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View Full Version : Things a high level spell caster can do



de-trick
2007-09-07, 09:21 PM
we all know a high level caster can do many things, but what about the stupid ways to use a high level spell.

like using a wish to make a piece of bread

Sornjss Lichdom
2007-09-07, 09:35 PM
hm... gate in a mephit?

Quietus
2007-09-07, 09:37 PM
Use Time Stop, Fabricate, some poultry, and a couple vegetables to make dinner, following up with Delayed Blast Fireball to cook it.

Setra
2007-09-07, 09:39 PM
Polymorph Any Object, to rid yourself of pimples.

Dervag
2007-09-07, 09:41 PM
Use Time Stop to get more time for looking at the pretty clouds.

0oo0
2007-09-07, 09:47 PM
Use Time Stop, Fabricate, some poultry, and a couple vegetables to make dinner, following up with Delayed Blast Fireball to cook it.

Best idea ever.

knightsaline
2007-09-07, 10:11 PM
Cast wish to make it so he has presdigitation as an at will ability.
Cast a wish and say "I wish this wish was not granted"
Create a spell that overloads a targets nervous system via climax
Reset....THE WORLD *polarization effect here*
Gate in a succubus for a childs party
Use wish to change genders

Collin152
2007-09-07, 10:13 PM
Imprison the bug you just caught.

Fualkner Asiniti
2007-09-07, 10:19 PM
Create a spell that overloads a targets nervous system via climax
Reset....THE WORLD *polarization effect here*
Gate in a succubus for a childs party


...:smalleek: You disturb me.

knightsaline
2007-09-07, 10:26 PM
These suggestions would probably be of an insane or perverted wizard with low WIS or insanity damage.

Sarda is a good example. Days were originally 36 hours long, but Sarda shortened it to 24 hours to make people hurry up. Sarda sent White mage into a pocket universe that ended up being the universe he lives in. He teaches Black mage the spell "throw up black mages organs" with a range of "black mage" Sarda is insane because he spent Aeons (yes, Aeons!) trapped underground and went crazy. Power Arcane and insanity should not mix, but its fun to watch.

bosssmiley
2007-09-07, 10:32 PM
These suggestions would probably be of an insane or perverted wizard with low WIS or insanity damage.

Sarda is a good example. Days were originally 36 hours long, but Sarda shortened it to 24 hours to make people hurry up. Sarda sent White mage into a pocket universe that ended up being the universe he lives in. He teaches Black mage the spell "throw up black mages organs" with a range of "black mage" Sarda is insane because he spent Aeons (yes, Aeons!) trapped underground and went crazy. Power Arcane and insanity should not mix, but its fun to watch.

£lminster who? Sarda is my master now! :smallbiggrin:

Mewtarthio
2007-09-07, 11:00 PM
Cast programmed amnesia on self so that the ending of Citizen Kane can be suprising again.

Open a psychiatric clinic. To get people to "face their fears," cast weird on them, then plane shift to a plane where time does not pass, clone the victims, and return the the Prime Material Plane and ask what they saw.

Life drain those annoying mosquitos.

Use foresight/time stop cheese to cheat at poker.

Play a massive game of chess against yourself using summoned monsters as the pieces.

Setra
2007-09-07, 11:04 PM
Use Wail of the Banshee to kill Mosquitos

RS14
2007-09-07, 11:16 PM
Cast antipathy inside temples and other public buildings.


The cow went up the hill. The cow went up the hill.
Next verse, same as the first, it never gets better, only gets worse.
Cast Magic Mouth, permanency it, have it sing constantly whenever anyone is within 90ft.

Symbol of Sleep on university blackboards

Shrink item cast on clothing... while people are wearing it.

slexlollar89
2007-09-07, 11:25 PM
Cast time stop followed by quikened reality mealstrom to "do the dishes" while at mother's house, then use the remaing rounds to sneak desert.

tannish2
2007-09-08, 12:34 AM
Power Arcane and insanity should not mix.

BLASPHEMY!

anyway, cloning rats for low level fighters to kill (none of u ever played any of the elder scrols games?) creating a god of turnips, buscuits, and tuesday evening between 3 PM and 4 PM in a specific time zone.

Elephant
2007-09-08, 12:38 AM
Cast antipathy inside temples and other public buildings.


Cast Magic Mouth, permanency it, have it sing constantly whenever anyone is within 90ft.

Symbol of Sleep on university blackboards


Uh...aren't those built-in?

knightsaline
2007-09-08, 12:41 AM
Sarda is from 8 bit theatre. If someone says "A wizard did it", more than likely, it was sarda.

Create a spell to find out how the tarrasque breeds, if it does. Clone Mr T a few times to see if these (http://www.cs.cmu.edu/%7Edkb1/dnd/tarrasque.txt) actually work.

Try and convince some succubi to become CG, then use Genesis to make my own demiplane. Get the CG succys to live in my demiplane.

Cast a controlled Reality Maelstrom near any of the Lords of the Abyss (except Malcanthet. She owns!) so that they are sent into the barracks of some unique Astral Devas. Tell the Devas that the wizard will be sending one of the Lords of the abyss for them to defeat. Make a deal with Malcanthet so that she takes over that layer of the abyss and in return, the wizard gets an amulet that stops the wizard from being level drained. the amulet explodes upon the wearers death and cannot be removed from the person.

Invent a spell that writes or draws anything the Wizard likes in the sky. Used to send village elders into a heart attack or teach young children interesting words.

Solo
2007-09-08, 01:05 AM
Try and convince some succubi to become CG, then use Genesis to make my own demiplane. Get the CG succys to live in my demiplane.

You, sir, win.

Can I get a ticket to your demiplane?

Its ok if its one way.

knightsaline
2007-09-08, 01:30 AM
You, sir, win.

Can I get a ticket to your demiplane?

Its ok if its one way.

Sure, If you don't mind the level draining and the deviant sexual practices.
The hypothetical wizard who created the demiplane has a contingency Plane Shift. the contingency to activate it is not really suitable for this board (thereby avoiding a red text warning). I usually play clerics, so I don't have much XP in wizards (Except that they are the goddamn batman.)

boomwolf
2007-09-08, 04:56 AM
you can always summon some succubi for your personal pleasure.
if you don't get it, you are not in the age.

Ruerl
2007-09-08, 05:11 AM
£lminster who? Sarda is my master now! :smallbiggrin:


*amnesiadustthataretotallynottaclumyourwaynow*

Krimm_Blackleaf
2007-09-08, 05:40 AM
Use mindrape on yourself to remember where you left your keys.

The Duskblade
2007-09-08, 08:19 AM
... That sounds painful.

Casting stone to flesh on anything you can find made of stone.

Threeshades
2007-09-08, 08:24 AM
Cast stone to flesh on rocks for dinner.

Green Bean
2007-09-08, 08:35 AM
Cast Time Duplicate. Shapechange into a succubus. Freud would have a field day if he weren't so disgusted. :smallwink:

Jack_Simth
2007-09-08, 08:55 AM
Sarda is from 8 bit theatre. If someone says "A wizard did it", more than likely, it was sarda.

Create a spell to find out how the tarrasque breeds, if it does. Clone Mr T a few times to see if these (http://www.cs.cmu.edu/%7Edkb1/dnd/tarrasque.txt) actually work.One warning:
That's a 3.0 guide. Some things will be different.

It also depends on how effectively a DM plays a monster - some can't figure out that Int-3 means "very, very stupid"

Tengu
2007-09-08, 09:50 AM
Use Bigby's Interposing Hand to prevent others from peeking while you change clothes. More useful for female mages probably.

bugsysservant
2007-09-08, 09:54 AM
Create an alarm clock with a time stop snooze button.

mind rape happy people to give them traumatic childhood experiences.

arm wrestle other mages with crushing hands

Awetugiw
2007-09-08, 11:46 AM
arm wrestle other mages with crushing hands
I so have to introduce that in my campaign...

"Say, mister fighter. Would you like to enter in the arm-wrestling competition with all those frail mages?"
"Oh, wait... They didn't tell you about the special rules used here?"

AKA_Bait
2007-09-08, 12:02 PM
Create an alarm clock with a time stop snooze button.


Oh man... I totally need one of those.

Prepare a bunch of fabricates. Cast Alter Self to look like a Jolly Old Elf in a big red suit. Give the little boys and girls what they want for solstice.

Solo
2007-09-08, 03:12 PM
mind rape happy people to give them traumatic childhood experiences.

I am intrigued. What is this spell you speak of?

Winged One
2007-09-08, 06:52 PM
Use mindrape on yourself to remember where you left your keys.

I think this has been said before, but wouldn't that be mindwank?

I am intrigued. What is this spell you speak of?

Some spell from the BoVD that basicly lets you do whatever the hells you want to someone's mind.

Anyhoo...

Cast freedom on a mocha latte held by an intern.
Cast Mordenkainen's disjunction. Seriously, using that spell is the dumbest thing a mage can do at high levels.
Cast screen on his bedchamber when he's...alone.:smalleek:
Cast discern location on his keys. Seriously, locate object is good enough.:smallwink:

Solo
2007-09-08, 07:16 PM
Power Word: Orgasm.

Nuff said.

SilverClawShift
2007-09-08, 07:17 PM
I could say something about using Silent Image for entertainment purposes, but it would probably get me into a fair bit of trouble.

knightsaline
2007-09-09, 04:59 AM
Power Word: Orgasm.

Nuff said.

Want some spells from the Climax domain?
1: Heighten senses
2: Rabbits Stamina
3: Explosive Orgasm
4: Restoration
5: Symbol of male pleasure
6: Greater Rabbits stamina
7: Power word: Orgasm
8: Symbol of Female pleasure
9: Circle of Orgasm

Sedrea and Malcanthet grant this domain

Tokiko Mima
2007-09-09, 05:52 AM
Run a daycare based on multiple castings of force cage.

Reverse Gravity in order to dust your chandaliers and clean your ceiling.

Run a gold piece based version of "Where's George?" (http://www.wheresgeorge.com/) using the Refuge spell and a common trigger word, like "gold" or "piece" or "change."

Send out Demands that everyone in town tomorrow compliment you on your new dress. Forget that you did this the next day, and wear pants.

Chronos
2007-09-09, 03:17 PM
Cast maximized Shivering Touch on a stirge (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/stirge.htm), so it's easier for the party's fighter to hit it.

CockroachTeaParty
2007-09-09, 03:32 PM
I gotta try that 'stone to flesh' trick on rocks... I wonder what the taste like cooked?

bugsysservant
2007-09-09, 04:04 PM
Want some spells from the Climax domain?
1: Heighten senses
2: Rabbits Stamina
3: Explosive Orgasm
4: Restoration
5: Symbol of male pleasure
6: Greater Rabbits stamina
7: Power word: Orgasm
8: Symbol of Female pleasure
9: Circle of Orgasm

Sedrea and Malcanthet grant this domain

I really don't want to know the granted power of that domain :smalleek: . *twitches*


I gotta try that 'stone to flesh' trick on rocks... I wonder what the taste like cooked?

wasn't that a major way to get food in Nethack? IIRC, getting stone to flesh as a starting spell meant you never starved as long as there were boulders.

Mewtarthio
2007-09-09, 04:08 PM
Create a headband of at-will Sending. Become the ultimate assassin by repeatedly sending annoyingly repetitive songs at your marks until they kill themselves. Then mind rape (or programmed amnesia) yourself to get the tune out of your head.

Wulfram
2007-09-09, 04:21 PM
Use Wish to cure your common cold.

Commune: Should I take a raincoat?

Imprison people who annoy me. A couple of days later, cast Freedom, and ask them if they've learnt their lesson.

Discern Location of your glasses

Instant Summons on your glasses. Get's expensive if you're very forgetful though.

bugsysservant
2007-09-09, 04:28 PM
Discern Location of your glasses

Instant Summons on your glasses. Get's expensive if you're very forgetful though.

That's only really useless if you're the type of person who leaves your glasses on your head and forgets about them. Its even better if you contact other planes to ask where they are.

"Oh great and wise Pelor, where are my glasses?"
"Um, is this somekind of joke?''
"Nay, in your great wisdom, reveal to me the location of my missing occular apparati"
"Dude, they're on top of your head."

slexlollar89
2007-09-09, 05:00 PM
Foresight to predict the weather.

Timestop to have enough time to Greater eleport back to your tower

Discern Location to find your umberela

forget the umberella and Floating Dsik above your head

Plane Shift to plane of fire to dry off

Polymorph any object to turn the umberella salesmen into n intelligent, auto ummoning umberella with an ego score capable of overpowering Asmodeus

Have Asmodeus follow you, while holding his large hands over you the next time it rains

Jack_Simth
2007-09-09, 05:06 PM
Do note that you need to be fairly short to use a Floating Disk as an umbrella comfortably, as it vanishes if it goes more than 3 feet above the ground; a Gnome will usually be a little too tall, while a halfling has a fair chance.

Reduce Person, of course, makes basically any of the core races fit.

slexlollar89
2007-09-09, 05:16 PM
sorry... you could use a heigtened floating disk... HA HA HA!

add a quikened reduce person in there, and add in a slik spell, so Asmodeus falls into the mud...

tannish2
2007-09-10, 06:11 PM
raise the ground so that floating disk will float over your head. and hit anyone who questions the logic of this with an epic spell that causes a death so terrible that those within 20 miles need to make a fortitude save from the noises, then wish/controll weather to stop the rain, resurect them, use the epic spell again, and then soul trap them.... then cast controll weather to start it raining again.

Chaos Bringer
2007-09-10, 06:50 PM
Try and convince some succubi to become CG, then use Genesis to make my own demiplane. Get the CG succys to live in my demiplane.


Invent a spell that writes or draws anything the Wizard likes in the sky. Used to send village elders into a heart attack or teach young children interesting words.

At this point, Use the sky writing to advertise your new resort plane, and make tons upon tons of money from teenagers and old men.

knightsaline
2007-09-10, 07:45 PM
I gotta try that 'stone to flesh' trick on rocks... I wonder what the taste like cooked?

Like chocobo or tarrasque. If the DM is feeling like playing with medusas, get the DM to put real statues among the victims of the medusa. That way, the cleric or wizard wastes spells trying to turn all the "victims" back to human.

Edit: Chaos, the demiplane is MINE! no one else can go in but me! selling tickets to the public is an evil act, one of which I do not want on my (twisted) conscience. Go play with the LG Eyrines! The succys are mine! Besides, some of the succys might just play for the other team (puts on belt of elective genderchanging)

Then again, the succys could level drain those I don't like and could make some money myself. I'd have to teach them how to cast remove disease instead of detect good and summoning demons. If Wee Jas can convert a succy to LE, I can try and convince them to become CG. I could have a small force of entertainers/rogues on my side. Maybe if wizards allowed succys with lower LA, the grapple rules might be used more ;)