Sad Character

[Sean_Tasker]

For my next campaign, the setting is a massive Holy War between the Gods.
My character was a Paladin of a God of Light, but my god was killed recently (1-2 years ago, in a 5+ ongoing war).
I'm generally an optimistic person, more akin to what the character was like before the god was killed.
I genuinely don't know how to play a sad character, that is still interesting and fun to play.
Ideas?

[YohaiHorosha]

Don't be "sad".

Focus on loss and emptiness. And lack humor. That will probably be enough

[Lord Torath]

Let me start by asking you some more questions:

Is your character going to be sad all the time? Probably not, so what sets him/her/it off?
- Mention of your god?
- Encountering ruins of your god's holy sites/temples?
- Seeing things related to your god's main portfolio (farms for a god of farming)?
- Using a weapon dedicated to your god (every time you enter combat)?
- Something else?

Why, exactly, is your character sad? (Yes, yes, your god is dead, but why does that make you sad?)
- Did your character have a close, personal relationship with thier god?
- Is your character sad because of the good things your god could have done or evil things it could have prevented?
- Does your character suffer from survivor's guilt (How can I be happy when my god is dead)?
- Does your character feel that they wasted their life worshiping a now-dead god?
- Something else?

How will your character manifest this sadness?
- Silent tears streaming down your face?
- Sobbing at night?
- Getting plastered every time you come to a tavern?
- Something else?

Do you suspect others in your party will try to comfort you when sadness manifests? How will you respond to their attempts at consoling you?

Is your character always going to be sad? Or will they find a way to get past the sadness?
- Sadness turns to anger directed at whatever killed your god?
- Sadness turns to acceptance and moving on?
- Slide into depression?
- Suppress all emotions?
- Something else?

Just being sad isn't all that interesting. It's how that sadness drives your character to change that makes it interesting.

[Rhedyn]

You aren't just sad. You are damaged. Your guiding light is lost. Clearly you still held to your just and right ways, but you have to ask yourself, "Why?". That nagging doubt can either moderate your zeal or cause you to sink deeper into zeal.

You have to question how this character handles loss. Do they get better, will they heal and grow as a person? Or will they not get better? Did this break them? Are they quicker to anger? Are they adventuring just to lose themselves in the quest to avoid darker thoughts and thus do not think over their actions to deeply. Does he laugh just a little too hard as though every brief moment of joy is a gasp of air from the nightmare that his life has become?

Has your character started to feel listless and no longer enjoy the things that he used to? Is he throwing himself into adventuring just to feel something?

Is your character taking larger and more noble risk because he just wants to die?

[GunDragon]

Maybe your character goes through a denial phase at first. "No, he can't be dead. Gods cannot die, right? Maybe he just disappeared for a while and is coming back."

[oudeis]

I'm going to sidestep your question and propose another take on the character: he's not sad, he's pissed. Let the rest of the world weep, he has work to do. He WILL keep the light shining, if he has to go to the Astral Plane and revive his dead god himself. Or become the new one.

[House Greyjoy]

Read "Small Gods" by Terry Pratchett. It's about belief and religion and faith and the life and death of gods. Become a philosopher paladin. It's just like a regular paladin only you spend more time thinking about the meaning of it all.

Some useful quotes from the book:

"I could be wrong. Not being certain is what being a philosopher is all about."

"What have I always believed? That on the whole, and by and large, if a man lived properly, not according to what any priests said, but according to what seemed decent and honest inside, then it would, at the end, more or less, turn out all right."

"There’s no point in believing in things that exist."

"Last night there seemed to be a chance. Anything was possible last night. That was the trouble with last nights. They were always followed by this mornings."

[Delta]

I'm going to sidestep your question and propose another take on the character: he's not sad, he's pissed. Let the rest of the world weep, he has work to do. He WILL keep the light shining, if he has to go to the Astral Plane and revive his dead god himself. Or become the new one.

It depends on your group, if the group likes lots of deep inter-party roleplaying, with strong relationships between the characters, the paladin despairing about the loss of his god might be a great experience.

On the other hand, many groups don't like so much personal drama and will complain about spotlight hugging or just don't care enough about the feelings of your character, then I'll also argue for the "Okay, now it's personal!" asskicking crusader with nothing to lose.

(actually, you can probably combine both pretty well, the pissed off crusader may very well use his anger to avoid confronting his more hurtful emotions which might break through given the right/wrong situation)

[Kaptin Keen]

Don't get sad - get even! =)

[Jay R]

Absolute commitment: A god's influence is not gone forever as long as one fool still believes in him. I swear to the memory of Apollo that I will be that fool!

[oudeis]

Absolute commitment: A god's influence is not gone forever as long as one fool still believes in him. I swear to the memory of Apollo that I will be that fool!

This is what I was trying in part to say, but you expressed it better. When I wrote that he was 'pissed', I meant that he was pissed that everyone else was succumbing to despair too easily.

[Mr Beer]

If you want an archetype of I Am Sad to work with, Eeyore or Marvin The Paranoid Android are good starting models.

"Here am I am, with a sense of faith the size of a planet, 'can you slay the orcs Marvin?', can I slay the orcs? I ask you."

[PastorofMuppets]

I’d like to know a bit about what it’s like for the remainder of the dead God of Light’s followers. Are his temples desecrated with his clergy slain or forced underground as a cult like organization? Have many turned from the dead god to worship his slayer following a “might makes right” sort of reasoning? Do you resent those that switched their holy symbols or do you empathize and maybe think about doing so yourself?

If you have the capability to be subtle you could be using using the sad or almost depressed outlook as a facade. Keep up the faith and hope in private, meet with whoever remains of the faith in secret while pretending to have given up to avoid suspicion could be a very fun RP opportunity if the group likes to be heavier on that aspect.

[Avanya]

Loss doesn't necessarily kill your character's optimism and if that comes natural to you, I'd keep that part of him. Maybe he believes there's some way to bring his god back - he just has to find it somehow. Maybe he believes there's some greater purpose that he just can't see. Or maybe he believes that his god will return because the world is still full of light - surely his god cannot be completely slain! You could even dial that to 11 and turn it into denial. This is just a test! Your god isn't dead at all, it's all just a trick to fool his enemies and test his loyal servants! You won't fail, you'll show him, you're with him always. Keep preaching his ways and living life like he decreed - perhaps even more now to show your devotion.

If you want to show some sadness or the loss hitting your character, it doesn't have to be something big. It doesn't have to be full on dispair and tears. It can be something as simple as silence and maybe a sigh. When your character would usually call on his god, maybe in a situation where there isn't much time to think, he'll do what he usually does, get no response and become quiet for a moment. A sort of realisation that something is missing here, like reaching for your sword that you lost. (this is pretty common after the initial shock of loss disappears and you get back to your everyday life - then little things pop up that remind you something is missing)

You can also go the route of trying to fill the void left by the loss of your god. He'll mostly be his usual self, only he starts doing some things he didn't used to. Maybe he starts gambling or drinking - not as something that takes over his character and becomes an addiction, but just enough to get a bit in trouble. Get drunk and do something stupid/something a paladin of the Light shouldn't here and there. Or start chasing romances in every town. Maybe be a little too eager to take on quests - anything where someone guides your life now that your god doesn't.