[3.P] Tanuki Marital Arts Style?

[MaxiDuRaritry]

No, that's not a typo.

Tanuki (https://www.d20pfsrd.com/bestiary/monster-listings/monstrous-humanoids/tanuki/) are fun little critters that have a rather interesting mythological history in Japan (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yashima_no_Hage-tanuki).

This is a much better article. (https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/the-tanuki-japan-s-trickster-god) Thanks, Palanan!

If you take a close look at the PF tanuki and cross-reference with the folklore, you might notice something: tanuki have a "slam attack" they can use with their paws full, and mythological tanuki frequently use their absolutely massive testicles as melee weapons.

Now, I'm not insinuating anything untoward, mainly because I'm saying it straight out: PF tanuki slam their enemies with their sexy bits, and their "slam attack" deals damage a few categories larger than normal for a critter of their size.

I'll let you ponder for a few minutes as to what happens if you take Improved Natural Attack (Slam), which increases the effective size category of a natural attack, or if you take effective levels in monk and the Beast Strike feat. Or if you find some way of adding supernatural male enhancements to your slams, such as via kensai. Sizing/eager/warning/metalline, anyone? And what the hell would morphing do?

Let's see what fun some more op-fu can do here.

[Edit] How about flaming burst? And isn't there an enhancement that casts prismatic spray on a crit?

[Palanan]

I would humbly suggest that this article (https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/the-tanuki-japan-s-trickster-god) makes for a better overview of the tanuki, both mythologically and in present-day Japan.

For me, the tanuki are right up there with tengu and kitsune as classic yokai. It's a pity that unlike the other two, Pathfinder doesn't have tanuki as a playable race.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Thanks for the link. On a phone right now, and finding good links can be a pain.

Hmm. How about making them a parrying weapon? Or a weapon that deflects arrows? That'd be a sight, wouldn't it? And he could brag about how manly he is.

"I took a hill giant's fist to the chin and only lost three teeth!"

"I can parry flaming ballista bolts with my balls."

"...You win."

[Maryring]

Their style would probably involve some sort of capoeira style, because what better way to get the proper momentum and angle?

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Adding the effects of a -2 cursed sword could be a mite awkward if you try to pick up a knife to cut a chunk off the Christmas Turkey when the curse kicks in at the last second...

The Dark Sun shattering ability would come in handy.

"I got that hill giant back for punching you in the chin."

"Oh?"

"Yeah; I goaded him into nut-punching me. He shattered all the bones in his fist."

"I said you won, already! Geez!"

Shattering
Price: +2 bonus
Property: Bludgeoning or slashing melee weapon
Caster Level: 8th
Aura: Moderate; (DC 17) evocation
Activation: —
This weapon seems to be heavier than a weapon of its type, and seems very solid despite the fact that many fracture lines mar its surface.

A shattering weapon increases your ability to sunder objects, and you are considered to have the Improved Sunder feat regardless of whether or not you meet the feat’s prerequisites. When making a sundering attempt, a successful opposed attack roll on your part causes the struck object, which can be up to the size category of the shattering weapon, to shatter and be destroyed. If a sunder attempt is made against the shattering weapon, then the attacker’s weapon is also treated as being dealt a sundering attempt and thus is subject to destruction if you succeed on the opposed attack roll. A shattering weapon’s shattering ability only works against objects made of bone, stone, or wood; you are still considered to have the Improved Sunder feat against objects made from other materials, however.

Prerequisites: Craft Magic Arms and Armor, shatter

[JNAProductions]

This thread is amazing.

[flappeercraft]

This thread is nuts!

[Raven777]

This thread is ballsy.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

I...wonder what would happen to the tanuki in question if he added the manyfang property of the dagger of the same name, from Savage Species? Throwing, splitting, and returning? Just assume the connective tissue is reeeeeally stretchy.

[animewatcha]

Hmm.. Chaos monk's flailing strike for extra added attacks.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Hmm.. Chaos monk's flailing strike for extra added attacks.Regular monk is better, 'cuz of flurry of blows. I mean, the jokes basically write themselves.

Psionic crystal has the same stats as steel so if you could find a variant of metalline that lets you turn your manly parts to crystal instead of steel (or use polymorph any object-type shenanigans), you could use them for the psychic weapon master (http://archive.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/psm/20040827d)'s bonded crystalline weapon. Of course, now they're fully sapient, and you could ostensibly use any psicrystal feats and other abilities with them.

...D&D can get really weird at times.

[ben-zayb]

You can naturally use Greater Mighty Wallop to increase effective size. But let's just say that, ah, the spell's range is Touch.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

You can naturally use Greater Mighty Wallop to increase effective size. But let's just say that, ah, the spell's range is Touch.Well, remember, it's not really gay unless...

Well, it might be. Where are you holding the charge, exactly?

[flappeercraft]

You can naturally use Greater Mighty Wallop to increase effective size. But let's just say that, ah, the spell's range is Touch.

Not a problem if you cast it yourself or get a willing person of the opposite gender though.

[Zaq]

Not a problem if you cast it yourself or get a willing person of the opposite gender though.

I mean, I don’t want to tell a tanuki what is and isn’t okay for them to do with their own bits, but I would find it hard to believe that someone using said bits as a primary weapon against all kinds of crazy opponents would have too much objection to which party member does the spellcasting for making the bits better.

To be slightly less fun about it, either slinging your balls around is sexualized or it isn’t. If it isn’t, then it isn’t, so it doesn’t matter who gets involved buffing things—gender preference shouldn’t even come up. If it IS sexualized, again, I would imagine that the tanuki’s targets would be a bigger source of pickiness than the tanuki’s allies.

Basically, if you care who touches your balls, don’t whip your balls out in combat/public.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Not a problem if you cast it yourself or get a willing person of the opposite gender though.How very heteronormative of you.

And given how tanuki are portrayed in Japanese mythology, sex has very little to do with it, I think. Not that they aren't rather extensive on that level, but their...ah...tools, are basically just...tools. Yeah? At least when they're not actively pursuing a mate, anyway.

[Zaq]

How very heteronormative of you.

And given how tanuki are portrayed in Japanese mythology, sex has very little to do with it, I think. Not that they aren't rather extensive on that level, but their...ah...tools, are basically just...tools. Yeah? At least when they're not actively pursuing a mate, anyway.

This is basically what I was trying to say. I think you said it better.

[flappeercraft]

I mean, I don’t want to tell a tanuki what is and isn’t okay for them to do with their own bits, but I would find it hard to believe that someone using said bits as a primary weapon against all kinds of crazy opponents would have too much objection to which party member does the spellcasting for making the bits better.

To be slightly less fun about it, either slinging your balls around is sexualized or it isn’t. If it isn’t, then it isn’t, so it doesn’t matter who gets involved buffing things—gender preference shouldn’t even come up. If it IS sexualized, again, I would imagine that the tanuki’s targets would be a bigger source of pickiness than the tanuki’s allies.

Basically, if you care who touches your balls, don’t whip your balls out in combat/public.

Fair enough.


How very heteronormative of you.

And given how tanuki are portrayed in Japanese mythology, sex has very little to do with it, I think. Not that they aren't rather extensive on that level, but their...ah...tools, are basically just...tools. Yeah? At least when they're not actively pursuing a mate, anyway.

Well most people are like that, pretty sure its like 90% or more of the global population is heterosexual. Not like its wrong for it to not be, its perfectly fine, everyone to their own.

Well on the other point fair enough. Like Zaq pointed out, if they are already hitting people with their bits I doubt they really care if a touch range buff is used on them.

[ben-zayb]

The real question is, who takes the Bludgeoning damage everytime they use Slam? Sure, RAW, the recipient takes the damage, but Tanuki or not, how can you not take even Subdual damage at least?

[flappeercraft]

The real question is, who takes the Bludgeoning damage everytime they use Slam? Sure, RAW, the recipient takes the damage, but Tanuki or not, how can you not take even Subdual damage at least?

They have +3 Natural armor. Pretty sure that would protect them from the damage to an extent, plus they’re not human and have likely evolved in a way that allows them to use their bits as slams without issue. If not they would have been left sterile before they could even procreate.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Well most people are like that, pretty sure its like 90% or more of the global population is heterosexual. Not like its wrong for it to not be, its perfectly fine, everyone to their own.Actually, I believe the numbers are 10% strictly heterosexual, 10% strictly homosexual, and the other 80% are split between various levels of bisexuality (on a slightly skewed bell curve) and "other," which includes asexuality.

However, that's for humans (who live in a specific culture). Other races (such as tanuki) and humans who have completely different cultural viewpoints likely have wildly different sexual orientation graphs. Dwarves, for instance, would have entirely different bell curves than most elf subraces, and that's not even including satyrs, nymphs, dragons, hobgoblins, etc, etc, etc.

Basically, the takeaway is that cultural norms of sexuality are extremely complex, especially when they interact with that of any individual, which may be completely different than what the average person may consider "normal" (which may be completely different than others of their race, culture, or even alignment).

I think you'd need the equivalent of a doctorate to understand most of it, and even then, you'd probably be a looooong way from understanding everything.

[HouseRules]

https://i.postimg.cc/W3Bdd6RJ/Balls-vs-Polyandry.png

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Any ideas on how to further enhance a tanuki's slam attack routine? Or stuff that's interesting and/or funny? Whether it's for a serious game or as tongue-in-cheek as tanukily possible, it's a rather interesting exercise.

...Y'know, the BoEF's pleasurable ability would be both powerful and apropos, if inappropriate for most games. Kinda creepy, too, at least if used outside of, ahem, consensually amorous encounters.

And the BoVD's clamps of exquisite pain would help with any possible discomfort from the tanuki's PoV. Not comfortable from most observers' standpoints, but I think that ship has sailed already. Maybe craft some as ioun stones?

[Maryring]

VoP, so you can be nude and powerful at the same time?

[flappeercraft]

Any ideas on how to further...enhance a tanuki's slam attack routine? Or stuff that's interesting and/or funny? Whether it's for a serious game or as tongue-in-cheek as tanukily possible, it's a rather interesting exercise.

...Y'know, the BoEF's pleasurable ability would be both powerful and apropos, if inappropriate for most games. Kinda creepy, too, at least if used outside of, ahem, consensually amorous encounters.

And the BoVD's clamps of exquisite pain would help with any possible discomfort from the tanuki's PoV. Not comfortable from most observers' standpoints, but I think that ship has sailed already. Maybe craft some as ioun stones?

Get that one necklace from Savage Species that lets you apply weapon properties to natural weapons and get Morphing. One moment you have your bits, the next moment you have a dagger and another a sling.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

VoP, so you can be nude and powerful at the same time?Only if you take steps to mitigate getting...err...neutered by VoP. Druid/monk or wild monk, since wild shape absorbs all your clothes anyway? Even then, WBL is better, unless the campaign is an especially poor one.

[edit] Plus, there are no rules for wearing magic pants, so this shouldn't be an issue.

[OracleofWuffing]

Any way to fish for criticals with this? You know, it's not just the size that counts, but how you use it, too.

[Ruethgar]

Psionic crystal has the same stats as steel so if you could find a variant of metalline that lets you turn your manly parts to crystal instead of steel...
I mean, Mineral Warrior?

[edit] Plus, there are no rules for wearing magic pants, so this shouldn't be an issue.
BoEF, pants take up the body slot.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Any way to fish for criticals with this? You know, it's not just the size that counts, but how you use it, too. The whole Lightning Mace combo of course.
Add impact and find a way to make them spiky to add keen (morphing property to turn them into a pair of flail spikes, but without the spiked flail's handle?).
Take Beast Strike to add your slam damage on all of your unarmed strikes, so you effectively make all of your unarmed strikes with your manliest of parts.
Monk 1 or 2 for IUS and "treat your unarmed strikes as manufactured or natural."
Snap Kick for extra attacks.
Minions with the PF Butterfly's Sting feat who use extremely high crit range weapons (pass your critical hit onto ally).
Earth's Embrace from Oriental Adventures (auto-crit when grappling).
Favored Critical from Masters of the Wild (doubles crit range against specified type).
Final Strike of the Executioner from Untapped Potential (+1 to crit range when psionically focused).
Final Weakness from Ravenloft: Legacy of the Blood (study foe to add +1 to crit range against it for the rest of the encounter).
Power Crit from d20 Modern, Urban Arcana (expend action point to auto-threaten a crit on a hit regardless of attack roll).
Roundabout Kick from Complete Warrior (gain an additional unarmed strike on a confirmed crit).
Shinsei's Smile from Oriental Adventures: Secrets of the Unicorn (1/round gain a -4 penalty to an attack to increase crit range by +1).
The Pincers Hold, the Tail Strikes from the Rokugan Campaign Setting (auto-critical threat if you attack after a feint).
And lots of ways to add effects and extra damage on criticals.


I mean, Mineral Warrior?Could work, but there are downsides, there.


BoEF, pants take up the body slot.Pants may equate to body slot items, but body slot items don't necessarily equate to pants.

[RedMage125]

First, a question...what is up with the damage bonus on his full attack? The Tanuki has a STR of 14, and his single attack does 1d6+2 with his quarterstaff, but when he uses full attack (quarterstaff and slam), he only gets +1 to damage to both attacks. I'm more familiar with 3.5e than PF, am I missing something about how the rules intersect here?

Also, if you all want to see how crazy tanuki get with their...bits...I cannot recommend enough the movie Pom Poko. It's a Studio Ghibli anime, and it's all about tanuki and their ability to change forms and use themselves as weapons/vehicles/etc. There is extensive use of "bits" by male tanuki, to include creating an ENTIRE BOAT for several other tanuki to board. I recommend having subtitles on from the original Japanese translation, even if you watch it in English, because the English voice acting calls it their "raccoon pouch".

[ben-zayb]

Can a Warshaper use Morphic Weapon to create a pair of...Slam jewels? Or does a created Tanuki Slam attack allow the Warshaper to attack with his own?

Now if I could only flesh out a Paladin / Warshaper / Kensai to finally create O-Chul and his +5 Holy Cojones.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Would it be tacky if I went psychic weapon master and named the resulting psicrystal weapon Julius, shortened to Jules?