Dragons_Ire
2018-12-18, 12:50 PM
Me and a sibling are co-creating a setting, and I had the idea of creating a new subclass for each class, inspired by various aspects of the setting. However, I don't have a ton of experience homebrewing, and I'd love to get some feedback so that I can refine my ideas. Please, critique honestly, and harshly if necessary. I won't take it personally.
I will include notes and explanations of my thought process for each feature in italics. Currently only the paladin subclass is complete and ready for playtest.
The initial concept for this subclass is an order of warriors who expose hidden evils. The main mental images that I used to inspire the features of the class were a warrior doing battle with a werewolf in a moonlit glade, a warrior battling a group of cultists he's infiltrated, and a warrior looking at a records book of a thief's guild.
Oath of the Nightwatch
The Oath of the Nightwatch commits a paladin to a lifelong stand against the darkness. Sometimes known as moon knights or hunter knights, these paladins are pursuers of evil wherever it may hide. Their arms and armor are often adorned with images of moons or stars, but some leave theirs plain and nondescript, due to the secrecy their hunts require.
Tenets of the Nightwatch:
The tenets of the Oath of the Nightwatch are the same, though the exact wording can vary by region.
Reveal the Truth. Expose evil, wherever it may be, and bring all dark deeds to light.
Shield the Weak. We face terrible evils, so that others with less strength don't have to.
Vigilance. We must always be on guard, the watchers in the night.
Unrelenting pursuit. Don't allow darkness to slink away and recover, pursue and destroy it whenever possible.
Oath Spells:
You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.
3rd: Bane, Guiding Bolt - These felt the most thematic. Bane is great against groups at low level, perfect for fighting a squad of cultists. Guiding bolt felt thematic, especially if reskinned as moonlight, but it's pretty strong. Maybe too good for a paladin?
5th: Shadow Blade, Moonbeam - Since the paladin can see invisible creatures via his Channel Divinity, See Invisibility is redundant. Shadow blade provides advantage when fighting at night, seems pretty solid. Moonbeam is possibly the most thematic spell for this class, and we have precedent for it being a paladin spell (Oath of the Ancients).
9th: Clairvoyance, Spirit Guardians - Expanding on the theme of watching/observing, Clairvoyance adds utility. Spirit Guardians is good for protecting, and defending against hordes.
13th: Locate Creature, Arcane Eye - These expand on the tracking/observing theme.
17th: Scrying, Steel Wind Strike - Scrying adds to the observation theme, and Steel Wind Strike is for standing between hordes and innocents.
Channel Divinity:
When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options.
Seeker of Truth. You can use your Channel Divinity to gain supernatural insight. As a bonus action, you grant yourself a +5 bonus to Wisdom (Insight) checks for the next 10 minutes. In addition, creatures have disadvantage on Charisma (Deception) checks made against you. This is almost exactly the same as one of the Redemption Paladin's options. I'm very satisfied with the flavor and balance of this option.
Rebuke Falsehood. As an action, you present your holy symbol and speak a prayer invoking clarity and truth, using your Channel Divinity. Each creature with its form hidden by an illusion spell, its form altered by a transmutation spell, or with the shapechanger tag that can see or hear you within 30 feet of your must make a Wisdom saving throw. If the creature fails its saving throw its natural form is revealed, ending any spells and effects which conceal or change its natural form and preventing the creature from concealing or changing from its natural form for one minute or until it takes damage. Huge shout out to cesius on this one. This is absolutely perfect.
Aura of Clear Sight:
Beginning at 7th level, you become suffused with lunar magic, empowering the vision of you and of your allies. You and friendly creatures within 10 feet of you can see normally in nonmagical darkness to a distance of 120 feet. At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet, and applies to magical darkness as well. This is really important thematically. When you fight a lot during the night, you kind of need night vision, especially if you're a human (like many paladins). Modified this to prevent Darkness shenanigans until level 18. I figure by that point it's not really that problematic.
Vigilant Guardian
Starting at 15th level, whenever a creature makes an attack against another creature within 5 feet of you that you can see, you can use your reaction to cause that attack to target you instead. Changed this feature to be a guarding feature. This seems a bit weaker than other 15th-level paladin features, but it is unique. The closest thing I can think of is the Mounted Combatant feat.
Unerring Watcher:
At 20th level, as an action, you can assume the form of a radiant watcher. For 1 minute, you gain the following benefits:
You have truesight out to 120 feet.
You gain a limited ability to see into the future. Your attack rolls have advantage, and other creatures have disadvantage on attack rolls against you.
Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
I think this is pretty flavorful, but is mini-Foresight too strong? It seems to be in line with the Ancients and Conquest features.
Anyway, I'm really satisfied with the class thematically, and none of the features seem really OP, but I'm worried that the overall package is too strong. It just feels a little too good. I hope that's just me loving the flavor, but I wanted to find some folks with objective (or as objective as possible, anyway) opinions.
Under construction
Under Construction
If you read through one or more of those subclasses, you are awesome. Have a cookie :smallbiggrin: If you provide feedback, you are even more awesome, have an internet :smalltongue:
I will include notes and explanations of my thought process for each feature in italics. Currently only the paladin subclass is complete and ready for playtest.
The initial concept for this subclass is an order of warriors who expose hidden evils. The main mental images that I used to inspire the features of the class were a warrior doing battle with a werewolf in a moonlit glade, a warrior battling a group of cultists he's infiltrated, and a warrior looking at a records book of a thief's guild.
Oath of the Nightwatch
The Oath of the Nightwatch commits a paladin to a lifelong stand against the darkness. Sometimes known as moon knights or hunter knights, these paladins are pursuers of evil wherever it may hide. Their arms and armor are often adorned with images of moons or stars, but some leave theirs plain and nondescript, due to the secrecy their hunts require.
Tenets of the Nightwatch:
The tenets of the Oath of the Nightwatch are the same, though the exact wording can vary by region.
Reveal the Truth. Expose evil, wherever it may be, and bring all dark deeds to light.
Shield the Weak. We face terrible evils, so that others with less strength don't have to.
Vigilance. We must always be on guard, the watchers in the night.
Unrelenting pursuit. Don't allow darkness to slink away and recover, pursue and destroy it whenever possible.
Oath Spells:
You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.
3rd: Bane, Guiding Bolt - These felt the most thematic. Bane is great against groups at low level, perfect for fighting a squad of cultists. Guiding bolt felt thematic, especially if reskinned as moonlight, but it's pretty strong. Maybe too good for a paladin?
5th: Shadow Blade, Moonbeam - Since the paladin can see invisible creatures via his Channel Divinity, See Invisibility is redundant. Shadow blade provides advantage when fighting at night, seems pretty solid. Moonbeam is possibly the most thematic spell for this class, and we have precedent for it being a paladin spell (Oath of the Ancients).
9th: Clairvoyance, Spirit Guardians - Expanding on the theme of watching/observing, Clairvoyance adds utility. Spirit Guardians is good for protecting, and defending against hordes.
13th: Locate Creature, Arcane Eye - These expand on the tracking/observing theme.
17th: Scrying, Steel Wind Strike - Scrying adds to the observation theme, and Steel Wind Strike is for standing between hordes and innocents.
Channel Divinity:
When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options.
Seeker of Truth. You can use your Channel Divinity to gain supernatural insight. As a bonus action, you grant yourself a +5 bonus to Wisdom (Insight) checks for the next 10 minutes. In addition, creatures have disadvantage on Charisma (Deception) checks made against you. This is almost exactly the same as one of the Redemption Paladin's options. I'm very satisfied with the flavor and balance of this option.
Rebuke Falsehood. As an action, you present your holy symbol and speak a prayer invoking clarity and truth, using your Channel Divinity. Each creature with its form hidden by an illusion spell, its form altered by a transmutation spell, or with the shapechanger tag that can see or hear you within 30 feet of your must make a Wisdom saving throw. If the creature fails its saving throw its natural form is revealed, ending any spells and effects which conceal or change its natural form and preventing the creature from concealing or changing from its natural form for one minute or until it takes damage. Huge shout out to cesius on this one. This is absolutely perfect.
Aura of Clear Sight:
Beginning at 7th level, you become suffused with lunar magic, empowering the vision of you and of your allies. You and friendly creatures within 10 feet of you can see normally in nonmagical darkness to a distance of 120 feet. At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet, and applies to magical darkness as well. This is really important thematically. When you fight a lot during the night, you kind of need night vision, especially if you're a human (like many paladins). Modified this to prevent Darkness shenanigans until level 18. I figure by that point it's not really that problematic.
Vigilant Guardian
Starting at 15th level, whenever a creature makes an attack against another creature within 5 feet of you that you can see, you can use your reaction to cause that attack to target you instead. Changed this feature to be a guarding feature. This seems a bit weaker than other 15th-level paladin features, but it is unique. The closest thing I can think of is the Mounted Combatant feat.
Unerring Watcher:
At 20th level, as an action, you can assume the form of a radiant watcher. For 1 minute, you gain the following benefits:
You have truesight out to 120 feet.
You gain a limited ability to see into the future. Your attack rolls have advantage, and other creatures have disadvantage on attack rolls against you.
Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
I think this is pretty flavorful, but is mini-Foresight too strong? It seems to be in line with the Ancients and Conquest features.
Anyway, I'm really satisfied with the class thematically, and none of the features seem really OP, but I'm worried that the overall package is too strong. It just feels a little too good. I hope that's just me loving the flavor, but I wanted to find some folks with objective (or as objective as possible, anyway) opinions.
Under construction
Under Construction
If you read through one or more of those subclasses, you are awesome. Have a cookie :smallbiggrin: If you provide feedback, you are even more awesome, have an internet :smalltongue: