Gonzo Games - 3e without character creation rules

[Quertus]

So, crazy idea - what if there were no character creation rules? What if you just came to the table with a concept, and the table balanced your concept to the table? What if the table statted out the concept to the party balance range. Same thing with ongoing factors, like items or spells. You want to buy an item? There are no prices - the table says the price based on how it will affect table balance.

So, in an adventurer for "10th level" characters, one could propose a low-int Ogre Psion, a Vampire Commoner, or a quadriplegic monk, and the table would determine at what level that would be balanced with the party. The table hands out levels whenever they feel like the character needs a boost to keep up with the party/module. If the monk wanted a Headband of Intellect +6, it might only cost him a few coppers, because it doesn't help him significantly / doesn't alter table balance significantly, but the 25th level, 12-int Ogre might need to spend a fortune for a even a +2 boost to intelligence. Want something that doesn't exist, like a sword-pistol, a Figurine of Wondrous Power - Colossal Duck, or an item that lets you automatically read all nonmagical writing within 10'? No problem, the table just determines how much it should cost based on how beneficial it would be to your build.

There would no longer be the concept of an unplayable concept / build, because the table would make everything work.

So, if all character creation rules were thrown out the window, what would you pitch? What could you play that previously you'd liked the sound of, but it seemed unfeasible.

Other than the above*, I think I'd go for a *real* Wild Mage... after finally running the character who can animate the dead, that's all, nothing else.

* OK, if a Necropolitan Pixie / Petal lost its wings and head, would it be a septapalegic?

[JNAProductions]

This sounds like it'd be both heavily houseruled and very difficult.

If you can make it work, it'd be awesome!

But doing so is a tall order.

[Uncle Pine]

So, crazy idea - what if there were no character creation rules? What if you just came to the table with a concept, and the table balanced your concept to the table?
This is basically how I handle character creation for players who join the group but have no previous experience with d&d or tabletop RPGs in general. It's worked well for me and usually allows for them to be introduced gradually to a series of game mechanics that would otherwise have to be explained to them in bulk. The only time this approach sort of backfired was when the girlfriend of one of my players asked to bring a vampire elf with purple/orange polka dot skin and prehensile armpit hair (https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PrehensileHair) to a 4th level one-shot (which was kind of weird, but we ended up making it work as a 2nd level half-vampire with the illithid grapple feat refluffed as hair instead of facial tentacles).

The other suggestions seem quite hard to implement in any sort of actual game: for example, nothing prevents the monk from buying a Headband of Intellect +6 for a fraction of its price and then simply hand it out to the ogre. It sounds to me like a freeform system would be a way better way to handle this concept than 3.5e. However, IF such a system would be made to work, I think I'd probably give the "kobold barbarian with a chihuahua's concept of size" a try and see how it goes.

[gkathellar]

It'd work a lot better in Pathfinder (I hated typing that), mostly because PF actually has expected monster stats by CR, whereas 3.5's vary so wildly that assigning the player stats would involve a lot of really fallible guesswork.

But on the other hand, 3.5 has such screwed-up math as it is that I don't know if you could really make things worse!

[Bronk]

I was in a game where this sort of happened accidentally... basically, one guy just never updated - and eventually didn't even bother bringing - his character sheet. He got around it by literally never doing anything, though.

A quadriplegic monk could work though, if it was also a beholder...

[Uncle Pine]

A quadriplegic monk could work though, if it was also a beholder...

If we go by the interpretation that a monk's entire body counts as a weapon and provide him with a +1 flying necklace of natural weapon, it's possible for a quadriplegic monk to not be at a disadvantage at all!

[Quertus]

If we go by the interpretation that a monk's entire body counts as a weapon and provide him with a +1 flying necklace of natural weapon, it's possible for a quadriplegic monk to not be at a disadvantage at all!

I mean, a quadriplegic Petal Monk is little more disadvantaged than a whole Petal Monk...