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View Full Version : Gamer Tales Barbarian on a leash



GrishakiTheGoby
2019-02-13, 06:23 AM
I would like to share with you all a story about a nightmare experience I had at my last D&D game in order to open the floor to a conversation about both my story as well as player behavoir or play styles in general that you can't stand.... this is always a fun topic to talk about, so this is a story I like to call "Nobody put's GorGor on a leash."

Some people can't help but turn a perfectly functioning game of D&D into a trash fire.
I know there is no "one right way" to play roleplaying games, but my lest favorite style of playing D&D is what I call the "10 foot pole style" which is when the group sits and discusses what would be the most optimized and risk adverse way to do something before doing anything,... I like playing D&D in a risky and Heroic manner and I loath sitting and talking in a meta sense about how to optimize the adventure and combat because it takes forever, slows the game to a crawl, and makes character acting nigh impossible. "Lets poke every 5 foot square with a 10 foot pole to see if it's dangerous."

I Dm a game of pathfinder once a week and also play in a game once a week. At the moment when I am a player I play as an Orc Barbarian, let's call him GorGor for the purposes of this post. Honestly the game wasn't very good from the beginning, the DM is a really bad story teller, everything is locked and trapped, and ever npc's answer to any question is "I don't know anything useful" but the company is good so it's still fun.

Or at lest it was fun until one of the players invited a new player without asking anyone. This new player raised every common red flag you can possibly imagine, she showed up to the game with a character that had 3 18 stats, 2 17 stats and a 16, she described her character as "impossibly beautiful and with one gold eye and one red eye." (the character is a sorcerer btw)
At first it was fine but it got really bad when we wondered across our first dungeon when she started back seat gaming every decision everyone made.

The fallowing are all things that actually happened but I've distilled them to there essence to save space
Me to the DM: "GorGor opens the door."
Sorcerer: "Wait GorGor we should stand 30 feet away from the door and have my character open it with my open spell in case there is a trap" (The party then spent 25 minutes talking out of character about what the best way to open the door would be)

Me to the DM: "ok well GorGor has Dark vision, and a light source will give us away so GorGor is going to sneak up the stairs to see if there are any monsters waiting to ambush us then I'll return right back to the party and let them know what I saw.... If I'm noticed I'll also retreat to the party."
Sorcerer: "Wait GorGor before you do that let me come with you you'll need back up, also I think we should only go far enough to see just into the next room."
Me to Sorcerer: "Ok..... then I advance just enough to see 5 feet into the next room."
Sorcerer: "Well we should get closer then that don't you think?"
(The sorcerer then proceeded to painfully declare each 5 foot step up the stairs one at a time to the DM)

Me to the DM: "Ok I walk across the room to the gate."
Sorcerer: "Wait GorGor shouldn't we wait to see what the other characters want to do first?"

at this point I had finally had it "They are big boys and girls if they want to make a deceleration to the DM they will do that, they don't need you constantly telling them to do it." I said. Things got a little tense here as I learned she doesn't respond very well to confrontation.
But do you see a pattern here? Any time anyone made a deceleration about what they wanted to do this player would interrupt before the DM could say anything to offer some kind of criticism or advice... it took nearly 30 minutes to an hour and a half to get through each room because this player wanted to interrupted every character action with a meta conversation about what she thought the best way to do things was.... Have you ever been playing a video game with a friend only to have that friend rip the controller out of you're hands and say "You're doing it wrong, here let me show you the right way" because that's what this felt like.....

"NOBODY PUT'S GORGOR ON A LEASH! NOBODY!"

username1
2019-02-17, 03:39 PM
This is a tough situation to be in. I’ve never had any over controlling players, but I have had annoying ones. Few things to try:
Talk to the DM. The dm has the final say, so if their on your side it opens up more options.
See how the rest of the group feels. If the other players are annoyed too your job is easier.
Talk to the player. If the whole group is fed up you can all talked to her. Explain the problem and how you want to fix it.
Kick her from the group. This can lead to problems if the rest of the group doesn’t have a problem with her. There are several good ways to do this professionally.
Leave the group. If you can’t put up with her and the others couldn’t care less this might not be the right group for you!

Hope this helps.

denthor
2019-02-19, 09:28 PM
Override.

I walk up the stairs. Her should we ....

I repeat I have walked up the stairs. Ignore her what happens?

I one time walked into a portal forcing the DM to say I need to resolve this the rest of the party followed.
Fight, got the adventure done in one hour. They wanted to walk around the portal inspect the dead body cast spells.

Sometimes you must take control.

Khedrac
2019-02-20, 05:17 AM
One advantage of playing a character like GorGor is you can use the response "that might be the best idea, but it isn't what my character would do" and restate your original action.

The main CN player in the games I play (he usually plays party-friendly CN) is liable to say "bored now" and do something if he thinks the tactics discussion is taking too long for no purpose (he's a good tactician so he can tell the difference between pointless discussion and useful discussion). I for one find this a boon, because even if it is not the best decision doing something at least gets us moving again.

Guizonde
2019-02-20, 07:53 AM
there is a new european game called KNIGHTS (all caps). it boils down to mechas fighting evil demons, but with a cyberpunk twist mixed with arthurian legend. in it, you have "drawbacks" that change your character's personality for different advantages. mine is being a junkie that gives me serious bonuses to mental trauma. another has a very paranoid personality. one in my group has a drawback called "hot-headed". zero patience, but very effective in fights due to higher reflexes. here's one conversation we had.

nick: hold on, let me snort some fairy dust before going in. something tells me i'm gonna need it.
baraz: wait, shouldn't we recon the place beforehand? you know, in case there's a trap?
nick: it'll be fine, i'll cover you. i'm the tank of the group.
leon: ok, i'm bored. *plasma burst through the door and walls*
nick: *finishes snorting* welp, if there was a trap, there ain't none anymore.
baraz: wait, what if-
*nick and leon go inside, nick first, leon scanning for hostiles*

we know of each other's drawbacks, so it doesn't bog down the game. if leon is in the party with baraz, i have to be on my toes. baraz's player usually isn't the kind to bog down adventuring, so that's why he took the drawback. leon's player is usually the one to meta-game forever.

perhaps you should have a talk about your characters' personalities as a group. if gorgor is hot-headed and a leeroy jenkins, make it known to the more tactical players. also, find out if over-the-top metagaming is bugging only you or the rest of the group. give your party's characters more personality than just playing the sheet. it usually solves a lot of problems.

in my pathfinder game, we used to only play the sheet. then by session 4, we all had rp'd personalities for our characters based on their actions and dice rolls. we wound up with an oracle who has zero patience for shenanigans, a comic relief support bard, a skill-monkey inquisitor with zero sense of self-preservation, a monk who lives for combat, and a paladin trying to kill everything evil (including the inquisitor). our coversations go something like this:

oracle: ok, the clues lead us here. inquisitor, monk, recon time. no monkey business. just recon, no murder.
bard: but we're not in a zoo! monkeys, murder of crows? *crickets chirp* *starts playing the flute to boost the recon party*
monk: i get first dibs on the victims.
inquisitor: *goes sneaking ahead while everyone is talking* be vewwy quiet, i'm sneaking into danger!
paladin: remind me to strangle the inquisitor when he does something illegal. *readies his massive armament to protect the oracle*

what this boils down to is that we know our characters' personalities so well we don't meta-game anymore. we instinctively know which role we fill out, and what to watch out for in each other. this kind of party dynamic evolves after a few sessions. maybe it's still too soon for your group? perhaps sharing backstories or more personal details of your characters rather than your stats and gear could help out. when i bring a new character to a game, there's a small paragraph on their appearance, 3-4 on backstory and personality, and just the main gear and class so the team knows which niche i go into.

at least, that's my two cents.

paddyfool
2019-02-20, 09:46 AM
I agree with the above advice about needing to talk to people, especially your DM and the problem player, if the group dynamic is being soured for you. It's not much fun if you can't play your own game.

GentlemanVoodoo
2019-02-20, 02:15 PM
2nd the idea. But there are times where you simply have to tell another player to shut it. Point out you do not interrupt them on their turn and the same level of respect should be given. If they still have a problem with it, tough. You shouldn't have to suffer and lose your enjoyment of the game.

Don't get me wrong. Diplomacy should always be done first but it seems from what you described this player needs a wake up to reality. This can be done while still being polite and respectful.

Hackulator
2019-02-20, 05:18 PM
Yeah just ignore them in character and continue doing what you were doing.

Hoplite308
2019-02-21, 12:01 AM
A lot of interactions come down to a power struggle. Sometimes it's really low-key: stances, asking for favors, negotiation, coming up with plans... that kind of thing. And it's important to know where in the pecking order you feel the most comfortable. At the top, at the bottom... it varies, and there's no wrong answer, but that's where you want to be. This works best when everyone is playing the part of where they fall in that order.

In this situation, this other player has taken a leadership position. She feels most comfortable at the top. That's fine, but there's more than just the privilage of leading that comes from being at the top. There's also the responsibility to make sure that everyone else in this team game is also having fun.

Take her aside, away from the table. Tell her your concerns. If she's more of a dominant personality, which I suspect, then this isn't considered a challenge to her mindset. It's a problem, and she likes overcoming problems. Don't go to the GM, don't bring it up in front of the group. That turns it into a challenge to be met head-on in the most efficient manner: leaving. By bringing her off to the side, the most efficient way to solve the problem is not being so controlling, assuming you approach her in what she would consider to be a respectful way that doesn't feel like an attack. If and only if this doesn't work should you bring it up to the GM.

I don't recommend just ignoring her or talking over her. She's doing it and that's rude, but you doing it will only accelerate the power struggle you're currently having and lead to either her leaving or the two of you getting into a fight.

paladinofshojo
2019-02-22, 01:38 AM
Not really here to add any relevant feedback, I just want to point out how poetic it sounds putting a barbarian named “Gor”-gor on a leash.....