Finally, a versus thread worth reading:

[....]

Here we go, first qualifying bout:

Big Bird vs. Kermit the Frog

Both of them are unarmed in a sparesly forested area with gentle rolling hills and a small pond about ten feet deep. It is a fight to the death and both parties are willing. Who'd win?

[skreweded]

This is not even cool. Big bird by far. What the hell kind of question is this? Big bird would sit on him!


:smalltongue:

[SurlySeraph]

Big Bird's weight advantage is just too much in straight wrestling. Kermit could punch Big Bird, since he actually has arms, but he might get stomp-kicked. Big Bird, definitely.

Putting actual thought into that question makes me feel... unclean.

[Da Beast]

Big Bird with his huge talons and beak.

[DraPrime]

Big Bird, I guess. I don't really know.

[EvilElitest]

Kermit if faster, more intellegent, and far more flexible than Big Bird. Big Bird is stronger, but is far less intellegent. Also i respect Kermit, not Big Bird
from,
EE

[ocato]

Well, Kermit

A. Dates Miss Piggy, who is a black belt and also minorly crazy, so he is used to dealing with a weight disadvantage
B. Is accustomed to handling the mafia when they try to collect loan debt on the muppet theatre
C. Has bard levels (which is more than Big Bird can say)

http://cache.idolator.com/assets/resources/2006/08/kermit.jpg

[Icewalker]

Big Bird has that size advantage, can't really be overcome by anything Kermit can do. Looks like a pretty simple fight to me :smalltongue:

[bosssmiley]

Well, Kermit

A. Dates Miss Piggy, who is a black belt and also minorly crazy, so he is used to dealing with a weight disadvantage
B. Is accustomed to handling the mafia when they try to collect loan debt on the muppet theatre
C. Has bard levels (which is more than Big Bird can say)

http://cache.idolator.com/assets/resources/2006/08/kermit.jpg

Kermit has provably kicked Long John Silver's ass. Heck! Kermit was toying with the guy!

Given this history Big Bird should offer the Mighty Green One no problems. If nothing else Kermit would dispense one of his customary Anvilicious Aesops (about friendship, or sharing) on Big Bird that would stun the big yellow turkey into meditative submission. Then, as Big Bird ponders what he's learned today:
*WHANG!* with the banjo! And the crowd goes wild! :smallcool:

Now Cookie Monster vs. Oscar the Grouch: there's a fight for the ages!

[North]

Big Bird loses because of Avian Flu :smalltongue:

[....]

Okay, so we'll say Big Bird won that fight, even though I'd put Kermit on top.

Next match is Elmo vs. Tinky-Winky. Same setup.

[Kaelaroth]

Tinky-Winky has epic levels in Bard, but Elmo single-handedly defeated Fruit-Pie the Sorceror, and took his title as Sorceror Supreme...

hmmmmm....

Stalemate. Elmo is fascinated, but Tinky-Winky is stuck in a time vortex where he listens to the alphabet forever.

[MrsbwcMD]

These are absolutely hilarious! The fact that some of these characters could have Bard levels just boggles my mind.

Here's one for y'all:

Rainbow Brite (and the rest of her crew) vs. The Care Bears!

And if you don't know who/what I'm talking about, then you darn kids can get off my lawn! ;)
(Brownie points for those of you who know which person I'm quoting there!)

[....]

Tinky-Winky has epic levels in Bard, but Elmo single-handedly defeated Fruit-Pie the Sorceror, and took his title as Sorceror Supreme...

hmmmmm....

Stalemate. Elmo is fascinated, but Tinky-Winky is stuck in a time vortex where he listens to the alphabet forever.

I don't know if I'd say Tinky-Winky was an EPIC bard...

[Kaelaroth]

He is clearly an EPIC bard. he just has so many skill ranks in bluff, you'd never know.

In my opinion, the Care-Bears would win.

[Indon]

The Bears' offensive capabilities are ineffective against Brite, whose non-brainwashing arsenal, if I recall, was much more respectable.

Plus Brite has space travel (I think?).

Edit: Another one: The Teddy Ruxpin crew vs. Inspector Gadget (with Penny and Brain).

[Drider]

Edit: Another one: The Teddy Ruxpin crew vs. Inspector Gadget (with Penny and Brain).

Ruxpin is big **** bear, inspector gadget is a cyborg, it comes down to the teams, Newton beats penny, and the dog was just there to counteract that cat. the bear would win, unless you include the boss of inspector gadget(can't remember his name) who threw explosive letters at gadget.

[Indon]

Ruxpin is big **** bear, inspector gadget is a cyborg, it comes down to the teams, Newton beats penny, and the dog was just there to counteract that cat. the bear would win, unless you include the boss of inspector gadget(can't remember his name) who threw explosive letters at gadget.

Chief Quimby, I think. I'd be tempted to do that if that were to even the numbers, but if I recall, the Ruxpin team is, under normal circumstances, 3 members.

Edit: What was the name of the humanoid catterpillar guy?