new class (homebrew) , constructive criticism plzz

[fuzziemanbob]

brawler


1st
Unarmoured defence, Martial Arts,
+2 Martial Arts 1d6


2nd
Martial reaction,
+2 Martial Art 1d6

3rd
Martial technique
+2 Martial Arts 1d6
4th
Ability score improvement, action surge
+2 Martial Arts 1d6
5th
Extra attack, tough skin
+3 Martial Arts 1d6
6th
Martial technique feature
+3 Martial Arts 1d8
7th
Martial reaction improvement
Ability score improvement
+3 Martial Arts 1d8
8th
Martial technique feature blood frenzy
+3 Martial Arts 1d8
9th
Martial reaction improvement, action surge (2 uses)
+4 Martial Arts 1d8
10th
Tough skin improvement, ability score improvement
+4 Martial Arts 1d8
11th
Extra attack 2
+4 Martial Arts 1d10
12th
Martial technique feature
+4 Martial Arts 1d10
13th
Blood Frenzy improvement
+5 Martial Arts 1d10
14th
Ability score improvement
+5 Martial Arts 1d10
15th
Martial reaction improvement (action surge) 3 uses
+5 Martial Arts 1d10
16th
Tough skin improvement
+5 Martial Arts 1d12
17th
Extra attack 3 ability score improvement
+6 Martial Arts 1d12
18th
Martial technique feature
+6 Martial Arts 1d12
19th
Blood frenzy improvement
+7 Martial Arts 2d12
20th
Ability score improvement, extra attack 4, martial technique feature
+7 Martial Arts 2d12
CLASS FEATURES
As a brute, you gain the following class features.
HIT POINTS
Hit Dice: 1d12 per brute level
Hit Points at 1st Level: 12 + your Constitution modifier
Hit Points at Higher Levels: 1d12 (or 7) + your Constitution modifier per brute level after 1st
PROFICIENCIES
Armour: Light armour,
Weapons: Simple weapons, gauntlets 1d4 bludgeoning, knuckle blades 1d8 slashing, knuckle dusters 1d4 bludgeoning, claws 1d4 slashing, knuckle axes 1d6 slashing, spiked gauntlets 1d6 piercing, gauntlet sword 1d10 slashing, spiked boots 1d6 piercing, steel boots 1d4
Tools: None
Saving Throws: Strength, dexterity
Skills: Choose two from acrobatics, athletics, intimidation, perception, stealth, performance, medicine
Expertises
EQUIPMENT
You start with the following equipment, in addition to
the equipment granted by your background:
• (a) An explorer's pack or (b) a Dungeoneer's pack
• (a) 2 spiked boots or (b) 2 knuckle dusters





Unarmoured defence
While you are not wearing any armour, your Armor Class
equals 10 + your Dexterity modifier + your Constitution
modifier. You can use a shield and still gain this benefit.


Blood Frenzy
You can only enter a blood frenzy when you have dealt damage this combat
When you enter a blood frenzy you have resistance to slashing, bludgeoning and piercing damage, you deal double damage when you make a melee attack, you can make one extra bonus attack per turn, blood frenzy lasts for 2 turns. You can only enter into a blood frenzy once per long rest. Twice after the first improvement and 3 times after the second improvement


Martial reaction
When you are attacked you can use your reaction to counter-attack if they do not succeed on the attack. You get to chose 1 counterattack at 2nd 7th 9th and 15th reaction, you use your str/dex mod + proficiency bonus when you are attacked.

Forearm block, you block the attack and punch the opponent. 1d4 bludgeoning

Dodge strike, you dodge the attack and palm strike the opponent 1d4 bludgeoning

Flip. you knock the opponent prone and deal straight 1d6

Counter kick, you kick the opponent as they run at you. You deal 1d6


Tough skin
if you are attacked you roll a con save and if you roll higher than the attack you take half damage. You get 2 uses when you first get the ability and once more each time you at 10th and 16th lvl

Martial technique
boxer:
You become an extremely talented fist fighter. you learn different strikes to deal more dammage to
Roundhouse punch + 1d4
Back kick + 1d6
Axe kick + 1d8
Uppercut + 1d10
Palm strike + 1d12
Spinning elbow + 2d8



Grappler
You become an effective ground fighter who can hold his own while grappling with an opponent
Tackle, you knock the opponent prone and they must beat your roll to break out of the hold
Chokehold, you deal + 1d4 bludgeoning damage and are grappled
Armbar, + 1d6 bludgeoning and are grappled
Double arm lock + 1d8 bludgeoning and are grappled
Triangle hold + 1d10 bludgeoning and are grappled
Constriction lock + 1d12 bludgeoning and are grappled






ACTION SURGE
Starting at 4th level, you can push yourself beyond your normal limits for a moment. On your turn, you can take one additional action on top of your regular action and a possible bonus action. Once you use this feature, you must finish a short or long rest before you can use it again. Starting at 9th, and 15th level, you can use it twice and 3 times before a rest, but only once on the same turn.

[nickl_2000]

okay, first thing is first here. Please, please, please format. It is very difficult to read as it is right now.

I'm assuming that martial arts grows like the Monks does (you should define this). However, if it does, giving someone 2d12+dex damage with 5 total attacks and action surge is completely ludicrous. You are looking at a possible 80 damage in a single round without using a single resource, if you action surge you are looking at a potential 160 damage (using average damage on the die). In the end, you are a better hand to hand combatant than a barbarian or fighter and you are a better martial artist than a Monk, which isn't okay.

Beyond the overpoweredness of this class, it doesn't really seem to have much of an identity on it's own outside of the counterattacks. You have martial arts from Monk, Action Surge from fighter, and that is pretty much it. What is the actual goal here? What missing element in the PhB classes do you see missing that is filled by this class.

Additionally something to remember when you are homebrewing a subclass or class. There are 3 tiers to D&D, combat, social, and exploration. You have fallen into a trap that many fall into, you are building for combat and pretty much nothing else. Not only do you get no class features that build on those tiers, but you don't even get any tools.




Honestly, it is looking like you are trying to make an unarmed or martial arts fighter. If you are looking to do that, work within a system that exists. Take the Fighter Chassis and make this into a subclass of fighter. That will keep it at least a little bit more balanced and standard.

[Frozenstep]

Constructive criticism? Ok.

You could do to format things better. It's unclear what +2 martial arts means. Is that your proficiency bonus?

Second, the class seems like a mishmash of other class's strongest features. The extra attacks and action surge of a fighter, the health and rage of a barbarian, the ability to still use a shield alongside martial arts (bad flavor, imo), monk martial art scaling except way stronger...

Look, I think you'd be better off designing a subclass first. If you have to take from other classes just to build your own base class, it won't have much of its own identity.

[nickl_2000]

Also try and post only once if you can :)


http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?587925-new-class-constructive-criticism-plzz&p=23906443#post23906443