What your PC wants VS What your PC needs

[ivoze]

Whenever you create your characters in dnd or really any ttrpg, you have to set their goals and ambitions. What they want from this grand adventure of theirs and all that. Thing is, What your character wants isnt always the same as what you (i.e. the player) think they need. For example, one of my characters left their abusive parents under a vow to return one day to prove himself to them. He want to basically rub it in their face and prove he isnt such a failure as they deemed him. However, what i think would be best is to actually reconcile with his parents since I, the player know, that his parents where only hard on him because of their own upbringing and they dont know better. So the question is, should we the players help guide our PCs to do what they want and achieve their self set goals, or should we somehow try and steer them to what they actually need in life? Should this job be offered exclusively to the DM instead? Am I just overthinking this with metagame knowledge of my own backstory?

[MarkVIIIMarc]

Don't overthink it but also realize your PC's relationship with his/her parents may change with time.

Heck, perhaps they'll realize dad is a terrible Lord of the fiefdom and decide to overthrow him instead of show him up.

Perhaps the PC will mellow with age after he has to raise a child or two or when he sees how rough the world is.

[Sindal]

In all honesty, you shouldn't plan the ending of your characters story. What's the point of a background that is also an ending.

The fact that your character hates their parents guts is as far as you should go.

You have no idea if you will ever meet or see your parents ever again if you've left home. It may never be relevant to the tables game.

If you, as a player, decide "well this is how it started but mu character is starting to have a change of heart". Just do it. Play your character having a change of heart, in the moment instead of 'what's gonna happen later'. Whether it works out or not is up to you and fate.

[DarkKnightJin]

In all honesty, you shouldn't plan the ending of your characters story. What's the point of a background that is also an ending.

The fact that your character hates their parents guts is as far as you should go.

You have no idea if you will ever meet or see your parents ever again if you've left home. It may never be relevant to the tables game.

If you, as a player, decide "well this is how it started but mu character is starting to have a change of heart". Just do it. Play your character having a change of heart, in the moment instead of 'what's gonna happen later'. Whether it works out or not is up to you and fate.

Agreed. Adventuring is a dangerous profession, and death lurks around every corner in the dungeons you delve

My Cleric left his clan for a similar reason as OP's character. To become legendary, so none could mock him anymore like they did when he was young.
He hadn't been home in 15 years.
As of last session, he went home to be there when his mother died, and completed a legendary challenge to remain in the clan, in spite of his 'halfbreed' status. So, in a way, he managed to achieve the goal he'd set out with half a lifetime ago.. but his adventuring days aren't over quite yet.

Even though he's the last of the original gang to still travel with the group. No character deaths, but players that had to drop the table due to real life stuff. It's a shame, but these things happen.

[Sariel Vailo]

A vacation is what my PC needs. What my PC wants is the goose stepping alchemist to try and experiment on her against her will again so she can rearrange his organs.