MagFlare
2007-10-23, 03:52 AM
The squire jogged breathlessly alongside his master's horse, a sack full of weapons jangling on his back. "A vampire lord, sir? Sounds like trouble."
"No kidding," said the fighter gravely.
"I'd recommend the longspear today, sir," the squire advised. "Don't want to get too close to a vampire. On account of the level drain, sir."
The fighter appeared to consider it. "But the villagers said he commanded an army of skeletal minions," he said. "Fat lot of good a longspear will do there."
"Ah," the squire said. "Then you'll be wanting the warhammer, sir. There's no better way of dealing with skeletons than bludgeoning damage, they say."
The castle loomed overhead. Predictably enough, bats were circling the belfries.
"Remember the undead bane longsword I got two towns back? It'd be a shame not to use it here," said the fighter.
"It's a tough choice," the squire agreed. "So - which one will it be, sir?"
The fighter dismounted gracelessly, tied his horse to a nearby tree, and took the proffered bag of weapons. A faraway look passed over his eyes.
"Sir?" said the squire.
"Maybe I don't need to choose," the fighter said thoughtfully. "Say, do you have any twine?"
***
"What do you see?" asked the fighter.
"Trouble, sir," the squire said, lowering his spyglass. "Looks like there's some activity in the ogre camp. And, uh, their leader seems to be carrying... uh..."
The fighter snatched the spyglass and looked for himself.
"A big sword," he said eventually, "with a bunch of little swords taped to it."
"Yes, sir."
The fighter sighed. "I knew I should have patented that damned thing," he muttered.
The Whole Bunch of Weapons Duct-Taped Together
Proficiency Required: Exotic
Cost: The sum of all the weapons involved
Damage: Varies (see below)
Critical: x2
Range: Varies (see below)
Weight: The sum of all the weapons involved
Type: Varies (see below)
Described by its detractors as "a terrible, but oddly compelling, idea," the whole bunch of weapons duct-taped together can't be bought in any store. Rather, each one is handcrafted by its wielder out of whatever melee weapons happen to be available... along with a length of string, bit of tape, or dab of glue. Creating a whole bunch of weapons duct-taped together (hereafter abbreviated as WBWDTT) requires no Craft (weaponsmithing) skill check; its proponents would say that it's more of an art than a science. In any case, all that is required is two or more weapons, some sort of connective material, and a full-round action.
The Basics
The base weapon - that is to say, the one whose grip the wielder will actually be holding - must be a melee weapon with which the wielder is proficient. It will also be the weapon with the longest reach, determining the reach of the WBWDTT. If all weapons have equal reach, then it will be the weapon with the highest damage (before magical enhancements are factored in). Therefore, if you're attempting to make a WBWDTT out of a longspear and a greatsword, then the longspear is the base weapon; if you're making one out of a shortspear and a greatsword, though, then the greatsword is the base weapon. All additional melee weapons added to the base weapon provide bonuses and penalties.
If an additional weapon deals 1d6 damage or less, it adds one point of damage to the base weapon. If it deals d8, 2d4, or d10 damage, it adds two points of damage to the base weapon. If it deals d12 or more damage, it adds three points to the base weapon. A greatsword with two longswords taped to it would therefore deal 2d6+4 damage. The type of damage done by the WBWDTT is a combination of all the weapons involved, so a bastard sword with a club and two daggers taped to it would deal d10+3 slashing/bludgeoning/piercing damage.
But this power comes at a price (beyond looking ridiculous). WBWDTTs aren't exactly well-balanced weapons. Each additional weapon adds a -2 penalty to the attack roll. This penalty is reduced to -1 if the weapon is light or if it's a one-handed weapon made for a race smaller than the wielder; it's increased to -3 if it's a two-handed weapon or if it's a size larger than the wielder. (Weapons two or more sizes larger than the wielder can't be used in a WBWDTT, nor can two-handed weapons that are one size larger than the wielder. I realize I'm probably breaking some Monkey Grip Munchkin's heart by saying this, but I had to put my foot down somewhere.) For example, three greatswords taped together confer a -6 penalty to attack rolls; a greatsword with a dagger and a halfling-sized longsword attached to it has only a -2 penalty to attack rolls.
Weapons may continue to be added to the WBWDTT until it either can't hit anything or the wielder can't lift it, whereupon the wielder is encouraged to sit down for a moment and reflect on what he's trying to accomplish with his life.
Magical Enhancements
While WBWDTTs can't be magically enhanced, their component weapons can be. An enhancement bonus of +1 or +2 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +1 to the WBWDTT's damage. An enhancement bonus of +3 or +4 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +2 to the WBWDTT's damage and reduces its to-hit penalty by one point. An almighty enhancement bonus of +5 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +3 to the WBWDTT's damage and reduces its to-hit penalty by two points. Therefore, a +1 greatsword, a +3 greatsword, and a +5 greatsword taped together would deal damage equal to (2d6+1)+(3+2)+(3+3) = 2d6+12 damage, and have a to-hit penalty of (+1)+(-3+1)+(-3+2) = -2. A greatsword with a +5 dagger taped to it would actually have a +1 to hit and a +4 to damage, although this probably isn't the most financially sound means of obtaining this bonus.
Damage bonuses, such as those provided by flaming or frost weapons, cause the WBWDTT to deal an additional point of damage of the appropriate type, so a +1 flaming longsword and a +1 frost longsword taped together will deal d8+2 (for the additional longsword) +2 (for the enhancement bonuses) +1 (fire damage) +1 (cold damage). Similarly, bane weapons deal an additional point of damage to an appropriate target.
Any special ability which has to do with critical hits, such as the vorpal or the fill-in-the-blank-burst ability, doesn't apply to the WBWDTT. Keenness (and the Improved Critical feat, for that matter) has no effect on the WBWDTT. Special abilities dealing with alignment (such as Axiomatic, Holy, etc.) work normally insofar as bypassing damage reduction is concerned, but only deal an extra point of damage to members of the opposed alignment and only harm wielders of the opposed alignment if the aligned weapon is the base weapon in the WBWDTT. Dancing and defending weapons don't work at all in a WBWDTT due to the extra weight. All other magical special abilities - ghost touch, brilliant energy, etc. - work normally.
Special Considerations
If the base weapon is a one-handed weapon, then the WBWDTT is considered a one-handed weapon; if the base weapon is a two-handed weapon, then the WBWDTT is considered a two-handed weapon. No WBWDTT may ever be considered a light weapon, even if all its components are light weapons.
A WBWDTT can't be used to make a trip attempt, nor does it provide a bonus to disarm attempts, regardless of what weapons may be involved.
Sundering a WBWDTT is astonishingly easy. A single point of damage dealt to a WBWDTT results in the tape or string severing, the involved weapons scattering across the room, and the wielder - left holding the base weapon - looking silly. However, no damage is dealt to any of the weapons involved in the WBWDTT.
Anyone attempting to create a WBWDTT which is nothing but spiked chains attached end-to-end is immediately struck by a justice-powered lightning bolt from heaven that deals 20d6 damage.
"No kidding," said the fighter gravely.
"I'd recommend the longspear today, sir," the squire advised. "Don't want to get too close to a vampire. On account of the level drain, sir."
The fighter appeared to consider it. "But the villagers said he commanded an army of skeletal minions," he said. "Fat lot of good a longspear will do there."
"Ah," the squire said. "Then you'll be wanting the warhammer, sir. There's no better way of dealing with skeletons than bludgeoning damage, they say."
The castle loomed overhead. Predictably enough, bats were circling the belfries.
"Remember the undead bane longsword I got two towns back? It'd be a shame not to use it here," said the fighter.
"It's a tough choice," the squire agreed. "So - which one will it be, sir?"
The fighter dismounted gracelessly, tied his horse to a nearby tree, and took the proffered bag of weapons. A faraway look passed over his eyes.
"Sir?" said the squire.
"Maybe I don't need to choose," the fighter said thoughtfully. "Say, do you have any twine?"
***
"What do you see?" asked the fighter.
"Trouble, sir," the squire said, lowering his spyglass. "Looks like there's some activity in the ogre camp. And, uh, their leader seems to be carrying... uh..."
The fighter snatched the spyglass and looked for himself.
"A big sword," he said eventually, "with a bunch of little swords taped to it."
"Yes, sir."
The fighter sighed. "I knew I should have patented that damned thing," he muttered.
The Whole Bunch of Weapons Duct-Taped Together
Proficiency Required: Exotic
Cost: The sum of all the weapons involved
Damage: Varies (see below)
Critical: x2
Range: Varies (see below)
Weight: The sum of all the weapons involved
Type: Varies (see below)
Described by its detractors as "a terrible, but oddly compelling, idea," the whole bunch of weapons duct-taped together can't be bought in any store. Rather, each one is handcrafted by its wielder out of whatever melee weapons happen to be available... along with a length of string, bit of tape, or dab of glue. Creating a whole bunch of weapons duct-taped together (hereafter abbreviated as WBWDTT) requires no Craft (weaponsmithing) skill check; its proponents would say that it's more of an art than a science. In any case, all that is required is two or more weapons, some sort of connective material, and a full-round action.
The Basics
The base weapon - that is to say, the one whose grip the wielder will actually be holding - must be a melee weapon with which the wielder is proficient. It will also be the weapon with the longest reach, determining the reach of the WBWDTT. If all weapons have equal reach, then it will be the weapon with the highest damage (before magical enhancements are factored in). Therefore, if you're attempting to make a WBWDTT out of a longspear and a greatsword, then the longspear is the base weapon; if you're making one out of a shortspear and a greatsword, though, then the greatsword is the base weapon. All additional melee weapons added to the base weapon provide bonuses and penalties.
If an additional weapon deals 1d6 damage or less, it adds one point of damage to the base weapon. If it deals d8, 2d4, or d10 damage, it adds two points of damage to the base weapon. If it deals d12 or more damage, it adds three points to the base weapon. A greatsword with two longswords taped to it would therefore deal 2d6+4 damage. The type of damage done by the WBWDTT is a combination of all the weapons involved, so a bastard sword with a club and two daggers taped to it would deal d10+3 slashing/bludgeoning/piercing damage.
But this power comes at a price (beyond looking ridiculous). WBWDTTs aren't exactly well-balanced weapons. Each additional weapon adds a -2 penalty to the attack roll. This penalty is reduced to -1 if the weapon is light or if it's a one-handed weapon made for a race smaller than the wielder; it's increased to -3 if it's a two-handed weapon or if it's a size larger than the wielder. (Weapons two or more sizes larger than the wielder can't be used in a WBWDTT, nor can two-handed weapons that are one size larger than the wielder. I realize I'm probably breaking some Monkey Grip Munchkin's heart by saying this, but I had to put my foot down somewhere.) For example, three greatswords taped together confer a -6 penalty to attack rolls; a greatsword with a dagger and a halfling-sized longsword attached to it has only a -2 penalty to attack rolls.
Weapons may continue to be added to the WBWDTT until it either can't hit anything or the wielder can't lift it, whereupon the wielder is encouraged to sit down for a moment and reflect on what he's trying to accomplish with his life.
Magical Enhancements
While WBWDTTs can't be magically enhanced, their component weapons can be. An enhancement bonus of +1 or +2 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +1 to the WBWDTT's damage. An enhancement bonus of +3 or +4 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +2 to the WBWDTT's damage and reduces its to-hit penalty by one point. An almighty enhancement bonus of +5 to a weapon involved in a WBWDTT adds a +3 to the WBWDTT's damage and reduces its to-hit penalty by two points. Therefore, a +1 greatsword, a +3 greatsword, and a +5 greatsword taped together would deal damage equal to (2d6+1)+(3+2)+(3+3) = 2d6+12 damage, and have a to-hit penalty of (+1)+(-3+1)+(-3+2) = -2. A greatsword with a +5 dagger taped to it would actually have a +1 to hit and a +4 to damage, although this probably isn't the most financially sound means of obtaining this bonus.
Damage bonuses, such as those provided by flaming or frost weapons, cause the WBWDTT to deal an additional point of damage of the appropriate type, so a +1 flaming longsword and a +1 frost longsword taped together will deal d8+2 (for the additional longsword) +2 (for the enhancement bonuses) +1 (fire damage) +1 (cold damage). Similarly, bane weapons deal an additional point of damage to an appropriate target.
Any special ability which has to do with critical hits, such as the vorpal or the fill-in-the-blank-burst ability, doesn't apply to the WBWDTT. Keenness (and the Improved Critical feat, for that matter) has no effect on the WBWDTT. Special abilities dealing with alignment (such as Axiomatic, Holy, etc.) work normally insofar as bypassing damage reduction is concerned, but only deal an extra point of damage to members of the opposed alignment and only harm wielders of the opposed alignment if the aligned weapon is the base weapon in the WBWDTT. Dancing and defending weapons don't work at all in a WBWDTT due to the extra weight. All other magical special abilities - ghost touch, brilliant energy, etc. - work normally.
Special Considerations
If the base weapon is a one-handed weapon, then the WBWDTT is considered a one-handed weapon; if the base weapon is a two-handed weapon, then the WBWDTT is considered a two-handed weapon. No WBWDTT may ever be considered a light weapon, even if all its components are light weapons.
A WBWDTT can't be used to make a trip attempt, nor does it provide a bonus to disarm attempts, regardless of what weapons may be involved.
Sundering a WBWDTT is astonishingly easy. A single point of damage dealt to a WBWDTT results in the tape or string severing, the involved weapons scattering across the room, and the wielder - left holding the base weapon - looking silly. However, no damage is dealt to any of the weapons involved in the WBWDTT.
Anyone attempting to create a WBWDTT which is nothing but spiked chains attached end-to-end is immediately struck by a justice-powered lightning bolt from heaven that deals 20d6 damage.