I need some advice.

[lumberofdabeast]

I'm bisexual.

I've known it for some time, although I can't remember how long exactly. A few years, at least. I live in a Missouri backwater; not exactly the most tolerant place in the world. So, I tried to keep it from getting out. And more or less succeeded, as far as I know; I've kept it secret from just about everyone, except a few online friends I never actually have to talk to in person.

I decided, however, that I was tired of hiding this particular part of my life from everyone, so I decided to come out. The first person I told was my mother, as she was headed out the door to work; she was closest, and I trust her more than just about anyone else.

She thought I was joking.

So now, I have no idea what to do. Plus, I'm afraid that she'll get angry and throw me out when she realizes I was telling the truth, even though such an action would be completely unlike her. Plus, I'm afraid that none of my friends or the rest of my family will accept it, and they'll all abandon me as a result. Finally, although this isn't a problem I'll have to face for some time since he lives in another state, I'm afraid my (Georgian, homophobic) father will attempt to beat me senseless, which wouldn't exactly be unlike him.

So, any suggestions on how I should go about this?

[Trog]

Perhaps talk to your mother again? If she was on her way out the door she may not have had time to take you seriously. Talk to her about it once more and also explain that you are worried about how your dad will react and you don't want him to know until you are ready to tell him.

No idea if this is good advice or no but if you are serious about coming out and you trust your mother the most I would make sure she knows you are serious... and scared. Most parents would be most first and foremost concerned that you are suffering.

Good luck.

[QueenOfMemnoch]

Well, to be honest, I'm kind of in the same boat as you.
I've known I was bisexual since I was twelve. Or rather, that I fell in love with people regardless of their gender.
I'm now eighteen, and, while I know my stepmother would accept it, my father would go absolutely freakin' bonkers.
Anyways, what I've learned is not to define myself by my sexuality. Pick and choose who you tell and tell them carefully.
As for your mother, telling her as she walked out the door was probably not the best idea. Sit her down over coffee or tea or something (not dinner, preferably) and have a serious talk with her.
Just yelling something at her seemingly random as she walks out for work is not conductive to serious discussion.

Atleast, that's how I see it.

[BlackStaticWolf]

First, telling someone anything important while they're walking out the door is a bad idea. You ask people to pick up a carton of milk when they're walking out the door... you don't confess deep secrets to them.

Next time she's not busy, tell her you need to talk to her. That lets her know that what you're saying is important to you, so she'll treat it as such. Tell her you weren't joking about being bisexual and tell her what you're afraid of.

As far as your father goes, if he lives in another state, that implies that you see him infrequently. I also get the impression that you don't particularly like him, so I see no reason why you need to tell him at all.

[Solo]

What other people don't know won't hurt them.

I see no reason for most people to know your sexuality.

Tell them if you want, but I don't think its a crucial bit of information.


Oh, and if your father hits you or anything, a call to the police is advisiable.

[lumberofdabeast]

First, telling someone anything important while they're walking out the door is a bad idea. You ask people to pick up a carton of milk when they're walking out the door... you don't confess deep secrets to them.

I'd decided today was the day several hours beforehand, and... well... I had problems working up enough enough nerve to do so. One of those now or never moments, when you aren't thinking very rationally.


Next time she's not busy, tell her you need to talk to her. That lets her know that what you're saying is important to you, so she'll treat it as such. Tell her you weren't joking about being bisexual and tell her what you're afraid of.

As far as your father goes, if he lives in another state, that implies that you see him infrequently. I also get the impression that you don't particularly like him, so I see no reason why you need to tell him at all.

Yes, I see him infrequently, but I do like him. He is my dad, after all. I just admit that he has a lot of flaws. And I can't not tell him; if I thought I could keep this a secret any longer, this wouldn't be a problem. While I'm thinking about relatives that live in other states, there's my sister, who is just short of guaranteed to disown me as much as she can as soon as she learns, if minors are allowed to disown siblings.

EDIT: Since the idea of simply not telling seems to be coming up a lot, I want to say that, if I could simply keep quiet about it, I would. But it feels too much like lying to me, and it's been bugging me for the past few weeks.

[Solo]

Minors cannot legally disown you, no...


And I can't not tell him; if I thought I could keep this a secret any longer, this wouldn't be a problem.

Why do you feel it important for him to know?

[Brickwall]

I think I saw someone say, "don't define yourself by your sexuality". So you're bisexual. If you end up falling in love with a female, then nobody ever needs to know, except her of course. And if you fall in love with a male, well, it can just be a surprise. It's not like they'd do anything different finding out about it that way than they would with you sitting down and telling them.

Except maybe have a greater chance of getting a heart attack, which is just guaranteed funsies anyway. :smallamused:

EDIT: I just noticed that you feel guilty about not telling people. What do you mean? I don't go blurting out "I like the womenfolks!" just because I'm straight, but nobody can be absolutely sure. I mean, if someone asks me (and they do on occasion), sure, I'll tell them I'm straight, but there's no reason to say anything about it. I realize it's not exactly the same, since straightness is commonly accepted, but the point is: why do you feel that you're lying, and what exactly is wrong with a lie that makes things more peaceful? This isn't a conflict where postponing it will make it worse. If your family can't care about you no matter what, you owe them no oaths or secrets. If you really feel bad about it, find some kind of psychologist who specializes in this sort of thing. They exist, though I have no idea what size town you live in. Just know that telling your family is not high on the list of good ideas at this point.

[Telonius]

First of all, it's very brave of you to come out. I'm not gay or bisexual, but several of my friends are; and about half of them have told me that coming out is one of the hardest things they ever had to do.

Regarding your mom: shock and denial are extremely common reactions to news you don't want to hear. It's normal, it's human; don't hold it against her. (Easier said than done, I know). You might have chosen a more opportune time to tell her, but there really isn't any "good" time to break unwanted news. (I had to break the news that I'm not Catholic anymore to my uncle right before my wedding - he's a priest, and I know he would have wanted to perform the ceremony). Anyway, don't dwell on that part of it. You need to know how to move forward.

An important thing to realize is that she's your mother, and she loves you, no matter how twisted the way of expressing it might be. I'm assuming she has religious objections to homosexuality (bisexuality included in that). She's worried about your eternal soul, so she's scared that way. Bisexuality is probably something she doesn't understand, at all, so she's scared that way too. So fear is her primary motivator at the moment. It's going to take a lot of patience on your part - as well as hers - in order for you both to come to terms with it.

Now, about your friends. Just going on the polls and averages here, but you're more likely to get support from younger people than older. They might surprise you.

Other people who might be able to help you out? Well, If you're in public school, the guidance counselor might be able to. (Yeah, I know, in some areas they have a reputation of being useless, but give it a try). I'm absolutely, 100% certain that there are online resources for people who have just come out of the closet - they're just a Google away.

Most likely, your "worst case" won't actually happen. But, just in case it does, let's consider it. Your mom tosses a fit and throws you out, your friends abandon you, your dad tracks you down and beats you senseless.

If you're still a minor in the US, I'm pretty sure she can't actually throw you out until you're 18. (I am not certain though). She's your legal guardian until that time, and if she's not doing any, er, guarding, then she's not fulfilling her responsibility.

If your friends abandon you because of this, they were pretty crappy friends to begin with. Friends pull together during difficult times; they don't toss one of their own to the wolves. And if they do, remember: they are not the only people in the world who will ever care about you. There are 5 billion people on the planet. At least some of them are willing to accept you.

As far as your father beating you up? Well, that's a quick trip to jail for him. If you ever, ever, even think that you might possibly be in physical danger from him, or anybody, call the cops. They're there to protect you; it's what they get paid for. If they blow you off (some districts are more enlightened than others), call the local public defender, or social services, or somebody else until you get somebody who will help you. If everybody blows you off, and you do get the crap beat out of you, call a lawyer; because you're about to get a few million in a negligence case.

Anyway, best of luck to you. I hope things work out!

[Darken Rahl]

Don't allow the conversation to be about sex. Don't get led into a discussion about how the sexual act works, who you're going to be having sex with, or anything like that. Instead, I would focus on identity issues, and how this shapes who you are, instead of allowing the people you tell to assume this is simply about who you want to sleep with. You know it's deeper than that, and to ensure that they understand and don't take it either as a joke or some sort of "wrong decision," you need to help them understand this as well.

[lumberofdabeast]

I think I saw someone say, "don't define yourself by your sexuality". So you're bisexual. If you end up falling in love with a female, then nobody ever needs to know, except her of course.
I don't define myself only by sexuality. But it's part of the definition, and a major one at that.

And if you fall in love with a male, well, it can just be a surprise. It's not like they'd do anything different finding out about it that way than they would with you sitting down and telling them.
That's the thing though. They might.

why do you feel that you're lying,
I'm not sure. I just... do. It's a gut feeling, something I can't really explain.

and what exactly is wrong with a lie that makes things more peaceful? This isn't a conflict where postponing it will make it worse.
I'm just... tired of hiding it, I think. I want to be able to talk to someone I trust about it.

If your family can't care about you no matter what, you owe them no oaths or secrets.
But how will I know if I don't tell them?

If you really feel bad about it, find some kind of psychologist who specializes in this sort of thing. They exist, though I have no idea what size town you live in. Just know that telling your family is not high on the list of good ideas at this point.
Too small to have a psychologist at all, much less a specialist. And even if there was one, I could never afford it.


Regarding your mom: shock and denial are extremely common reactions to news you don't want to hear. It's normal, it's human; don't hold it against her. (Easier said than done, I know). You might have chosen a more opportune time to tell her, but there really isn't any "good" time to break unwanted news. (I had to break the news that I'm not Catholic anymore to my uncle right before my wedding - he's a priest, and I know he would have wanted to perform the ceremony). Anyway, don't dwell on that part of it. You need to know how to move forward.

An important thing to realize is that she's your mother, and she loves you, no matter how twisted the way of expressing it might be. I'm assuming she has religious objections to homosexuality (bisexuality included in that). She's worried about your eternal soul, so she's scared that way. Bisexuality is probably something she doesn't understand, at all, so she's scared that way too. So fear is her primary motivator at the moment. It's going to take a lot of patience on your part - as well as hers - in order for you both to come to terms with it.
The rational side of me is certain nothing bad is going to happen. I've got no reason at all to think she cares if I'm gay, straight, or reproduce asexually. But the emotional side of me, the side that is and has always been the dominant one, refuses to listen. I'm still afraid.

Other people who might be able to help you out? Well, If you're in public school, the guidance counselor might be able to. (Yeah, I know, in some areas they have a reputation of being useless, but give it a try). I'm absolutely, 100% certain that there are online resources for people who have just come out of the closet - they're just a Google away.
Not an option. I'm certain my stepdad checks the internet history regularly, and I have no idea at all how he'll react. Which may be a major part of the reason why I'm so nervous, now that I think about it...

If you're still a minor in the US, I'm pretty sure she can't actually throw you out until you're 18. (I am not certain though). She's your legal guardian until that time, and if she's not doing any, er, guarding, then she's not fulfilling her responsibility.
No dice. I'm 19, and I can't even get a job right now for legal reasons I'm not gonna go into.

If your friends abandon you because of this, they were pretty crappy friends to begin with. Friends pull together during difficult times; they don't toss one of their own to the wolves. And if they do, remember: they are not the only people in the world who will ever care about you. There are 5 billion people on the planet. At least some of them are willing to accept you.
I agree, but what never seems to get mentioned is that being alone sucks. And the middle of Missouri isn't exactly the most open-minded place in the world.[/QUOTE]

[Darken Rahl]

Many health insurance plans allow for a certain number of visits to a psychologist before they make you begin payment for each visit, and some even cover all visits.

If you need to talk to someone, look into it, because your health is of the utmost importance, physically and mentally.

[Brickwall]

That's the thing though. They might.

Except they won't. It'll just be another couple sentences for them to yell, at most.


I'm not sure. I just... do. It's a gut feeling, something I can't really explain.

I'm just... tired of hiding it, I think. I want to be able to talk to someone I trust about it.

You're talking to a forum that spans the entire world, aren't you? Anyway, it sounds like you don't trust anyone, or that there's nobody around you that you should trust. So you'll have to wait until you can trust somebody, or you'll have to deal with risk, or you'll just have to shut up that little part of you inside your head that sits around crying "I just want to be loved". It's a very useless part.


But how will I know if I don't tell them?

You should have other ways of knowing if they love you. Really, you should.

[lumberofdabeast]

Don't allow the conversation to be about sex. Don't get led into a discussion about how the sexual act works, who you're going to be having sex with, or anything like that. Instead, I would focus on identity issues, and how this shapes who you are, instead of allowing the people you tell to assume this is simply about who you want to sleep with. You know it's deeper than that, and to ensure that they understand and don't take it either as a joke or some sort of "wrong decision," you need to help them understand this as well.
That's something I hadn't even considered until now... Good thing you provided what seems to be some good advice on the subject, then.

Many health insurance plans allow for a certain number of visits to a psychologist before they make you begin payment for each visit, and some even cover all visits.

If you need to talk to someone, look into it, because your health is of the utmost importance, physically and mentally.
I, due to lack of a job, don't have any on my own. And, even if I'm covered by my mother's or stepfather's, I have no idea what I'd say to explain the need to see one.

Except they won't. It'll just be another couple sentences for them to yell, at most.
Emotion, remember? It's always emotion. I have too damn many of them.

You're talking to a forum that spans the entire world, aren't you?
Yeah, but I'm never gonna meet any of you, or if I do, neither of us will know about it.

Anyway, it sounds like you don't trust anyone, or that there's nobody around you that you should trust. So you'll have to wait until you can trust somebody, or you'll have to deal with risk, or you'll just have to shut up that little part of you inside your head that sits around crying "I just want to be loved". It's a very useless part.
Well, yeah, I do have some trust issues I'm working on.

You should have other ways of knowing if they love you. Really, you should.
And I do. But as usual, the emotional side of me... well... you get the picture.

[Exeson]

Anybody who judge and reject you because of your sexuality are not even worth your time. As for the father issue, just tell him in a public place, and if he gets violent get him done for assault.

So don't be scared of what people might think or do, just be yourself and remember: Chin Up!

[Brickwall]

As for the father issue, just tell him in a public place, and if he gets violent get him done for assault.

That's a good plan and all, except for, y'know, the part where he gets beaten up. That tends to be a downside.

[truemane]

You're in a tough spot, that's for sure. You can't stay where you are and you can't go forward. I can't comment intelligently on whether or not you should or should not come out or to whom or when or where or why. I'm not qualified to make those kinds of judgement calls. Regardless of my own sexuality, I don't live in your head or in your life, so...

What I can do is tell you that what you have to do is control the variables that you can control and let the rest take care of themselves. You need to sit down and figure the worse case scenario. Worst case. If the whole thing goes as badly as you secretly fear and dread that it will. Once you've got that drawn up, figure out what you're going to do if that happens. Your parents kick out out. What will you do? Your friends refuse to talk to you. What do you do? Your father does indeed physcially assault you. What do you do?

Homeless shelters? Hostels? Any way you can acquire money? Residence? Food? Are there social programs in your town or one nearby? Are there help lines? Community Centres? All this stuff is on the internet just a google or two away.

What about emotional issues? Are you prepared for your mother to never speak to you again? Your father? Sister? Are there social/religious issues for you at work here?

All of that needs to be taken into account.

Once you know that you're prepared for the worst, you know you can manage anything better than that.

You can't control how your mother will react, or your father, or sister, or anyone else. If you are indeed saying that you simply cannot live the way you live now, then you need to prepare for the very real possibility that coming out will fundamentally change your life forever and ever.

Are you ready for that?

If so, then do it, and let the chips fall where they may.

[Kaelaroth]

Build up your strength.

I am not bisexual, I entirely bat for the other team; but overall, I feel the process is similar.

Build up your confidence. Are you really ready to tell your parents? I realise it probably seems like this has been closed up forever and needs to come out, but if it hasn't been a problem so far, then it might not be a problem now... if that makes any sense whatsoever..

Anyways, if it feels it really has to get out, I would suggest that you talk to your best friend or mother. They should, as they are you best friend and mother, trust and respect your decision. The most important thing to stress is that you aren't joking. I have been open with lots of my schoolmates for at least a year, and many still thing I'm just maintaining some incredibly twisted joke. Talking, just talking, is sooooooo important. It feels great to let it all pour out.

However, my situation is rather different to yours, being several years younger, homosexual and living in a different country. Yet; I beleive my advice is valid.

Whatever you decide, Good Luck! :smallsmile:

[Atreyu the Masked LLama]

Dear Lumber of the Beast,

I have nothing relevant to say that hasn't been said, however, I can and will say that I really enjoy your username. Very clever.

Good luck! :smallsmile:

[Solo]

I'm just... tired of hiding it, I think. I want to be able to talk to someone I trust about it.

If they ask, and you lie, then you are hiding it.

If no one asks...

[valadil]

How old are you? While I don't think holding it in is healthy, waiting till college may work if you don't have too long to wait. You could always move to Massachusetts. We're pretty tolerant about these sorts of things.

[Solo]

How old are you? While I don't think holding it in is healthy, waiting till college may work if you don't have too long to wait. You could always move to Massachusetts. We're pretty tolerant about these sorts of things.

Ah, Taxachusetts.

Tolerance is one of its virtues, though that may fail to outweigh some of its vices.

Choose wisely.

[Supagoof]

lumberofdabeast,

You are who you are. Nothing can change that. You need to talk with your mom to help her understand that. She'll probably go through the stages of denial ("No, that's not true, you're just joking with me"), Anger ("What do you mean! I didn't raise you to..."), Bargaining ("Well, don't you think you could try just liking [opposite sex]"), Depression ("I failed as you mother"), and finally Acceptance - which is what you want. Odd that I compared it to the five stages of death, but in a way the person your mother thought she knew is dying. Taking the time to talk with her and help her understand will get her through these stages. She may look for reasoning ("Why did this happen?"), but be sure to help her understand it wasn't a matter of why, it's a matter of when. Just as some are born to be rock stars and others are born to be politicians, this is something you know is just you.

The feeling you have inside is not healthy - physichally or mentally. You have shown courage by just throwing it out there, so we know you have courage. Now you need to take a little more and follow through with it. And know you have support of people here to help you along the way.

As for your father, cross the bridge with your mother first. Take it one step at a time. Doing too much at once is overwhelming and overloading. When it's okay for you to do so, then approach him. I'm not saying don't tell him, just don't tell him right away. Give yourself the time and thinking to approach him in the right moment.

As for the abuse thing, talk about it with him in a public place at first. You can avoid any worry of physical harm this way (I'm guessing a public place that will not allow a father beating his child is available in your area? Perhaps a McDonald's or a IHOP or something?). And if at the end of that conversation you still have worries or concerns about abuse, you have options at least, such as not going anywhere with your father and calling a friend or other understanding family member to come and get you. You may be surprised if your father doesn't react in the manner you think of.

Best wishes on this endeavor. I salute your courage.

Your friend,
Supagoof

[Tormsskull]

I have some kind of weird mental condition where I derive immense enjoyment from keeping secrets from people. Probably because it makes me feel all mysterious and such, and unpeggable. And of course the whole knowledge is power deal. So I would be giddy if I were in your circumstances, but you probably don't have the same weird mental condition.

That being said, I have no real substansive advice to give to you, but if someone you don't know wishing you good luck brings you any kind of reassurement or comfort, then good luck!

[Nightgaunt]

I can offer you no advice as to how to satiate your heart or your mind, or how to reconcile how your parents will react. While people may have some similarities what goes on in each of our minds is too varied for me to even guess as to good advice for you. Without knowing you I can't possibly help you. :smallsmile: So I will do the second best thing and ground the post in reality as much as I can, by offering advice on what to think about and what I've seen happen to friends of mine who went through this, or similar.

Know what you are going to do in the worst case.

Let's say you tell your mom, she freaks out when she takes you seriously, she tells your father, he kicks your ass and then he kicks you out. You are 19, don't have a job and are out on the street. I am not saying this is what will happen, but despite how awful and torn up you feel right now, it will not make you feel better to feel awful, rejected and homeless. Try to secure a temporary residence if everything hits the fan. I can't give you specific advice, because who you know, where you live, etc etc, is where that comes from. I'm just saying, have a place to stay if everything goes wrong. Friends, government aide, whatever you can come up with. Sometimes things go better then expected, other times worse. But you really need to have at least an idea of what next if it goes bad. Not having a way to support yourself is especially bad if you think their is even a slight risk of being tossed out. You are 19, which means they can toss you out if they wish. I don't know your parents, and I don't know you, so I can't judge the situation.

My own experiences...
1) A buddy of mine came out to his friends when he was 16, and his parents as well. Honestly, we all thought he was gay anyway, and his mother didn't think twice about it. Coming out of the closet barely caused a whisper of action.

2) A friend I knew from school came out a few years after while he was in college (21 I think). His father immediatly cut his school funding and told him he could go back to school when he "found jesus" or something similar. He took out massive student loans, ate the debt, and never spoke to his family again.

3) Another friend who told his mom when he was in high school (17 maybe?). His mother just denied it basically. Pretended it never happened and acted like he was straight. Eventually he told his father, who then beat the living hell out of him, and never mentioned it again. My friend continued to live in what was basically denial (his parents pretended he was straight, he didn't bring it up again) until he was 23 or so when he moved out. I mean the only positive side was they didn't think twice about having other guys sleep over, even though they still forbid girls from staying the night... whatever

4) Two girls I know fell in love while they were on the job. They both had daliances of both genders before that, but when they fell in love it was time to fess up. The one woman found her family to accept it, and the only thing they were depressed about is not eventually having grandkids (they did some scientific stuff later and had 'em anyway). The other women's family couldn't accept it, and basically told her she couldn't bring her partner to any family functions. Well... one less family

5) A women I knew more recently told her family when she was 21, the next day she was homeless. She did not have a particular positive experience over the next 3 years, but she is marginally better now. That is probably the second worst story.

6) An old friend of mine I knew when I was a little kid turned out to be gay. Everyone found out when he wrote it on his suicide note. I never knew him that well, but it was a rather tragic end. The note made it clear that his sexuality played a major role, or more specifically, the fact that he was terrified of telling anyone what it was ate at his soul until he had nothing left.

I don't know what your case will hold for you, I don't know what you have in terms of support. I wish you all the best. There are more stories by the by, but I am tired of typing. Other then my friends in school who came out, I had a pair of lesbians as roomates for a while and through association, made a great many homesexual and bisexual friends.

-Peace
"If I was gay, there would be no closet, you would never see the closet I came out of. Why? I would have burned it for kindling by the time I was 12. Because I know with all certainty in my mind, there is nothing wrong with being gay, and you know it."
-Henry Rollins

[Sisqui]

You said "the first person I told was my mother. Have you told anyone else? I know that you have said something to friends online, but what about friends in the real world? You might get more support from them as they are likely to be more open to it if they are your age. Also, it would give you someone to confide in who isn't as heavily invested in grandkids and how this will look to the rest of the family. You might just need someone to talk to face to face and a friend who supports you is better by far than a family member who won't.

[lumberofdabeast]

Nnh... She got back home from work, sat down, and ate some cereal while watching some forensics show on Court TV. I resolved to bring it up as soon as she was finished and the show went to commercial, only to have her leave to get some cigarettes before said commercial rolled around.

So, she got back, we talked it out, and it turns out she doesn't care about my sexual preferences, and she thought I was telling the last bit of a joke I had started telling her ten minutes back. Yes, we frequently put one conversation on pause to have another, then come back to the original several minutes later. So, yeah. One worry taken care of, a gajillion more to go...

Oh, and Atreyu, it's from a bumper sticker on the car I was born in. Funny how things turn out.

[Darken Rahl]

*snip*
it turns out she doesn't care about my sexual preferences, and she thought I was telling the last bit of a joke I had started telling her ten minutes back. Yes, we frequently put one conversation on pause to have another, then come back to the original several minutes later. So, yeah. One worry taken care of, a gajillion more to go...*snip*

This is awesome news. I'm very happy for you.

[QueenOfMemnoch]

I'm glad that worked out for you, and I wish you luck in the future.

[Skippy]

And now I see this thread, now it's all over...

Well, I'm glad for you. Good it all went OK, and good you have such good communication with your mother she could understand you.

Now, I just can say, enjoy who you are. No one can change you, no one should despise you for who you are. Live to the max, because we only have one lifetime.

[lumberofdabeast]

It's not over yet. I called my half-brother, and he's cool with it, which is nice. Then we talked about Guitar Hero for ten minutes. (He's on Freya expert, I'm trying to beat any song in Tier 7 Expert.)

Then I called my father. Turns out he's throwing a Halloween party for my little sister, and as such, will call me back sometime tomorrow. So, of course, I can't stop worrying. Not even Mr. Fix It helped.

Oh, and for at least one of my friends, it's a non-issue: He apparently now refuses to talk to me for some other reason, and as such, I couldn't tell him.

[lumberofdabeast]

Well, I tried to call at 6:00.

I stared at the phone for two hours, before finally managing to hit the call button. Turns out he was just getting ready to call me. We talked for a moment, then I finally said it.

"Dad, I'm bi."

"...So?"

I got all worked up over nothing. Kinda funny, really.