A Father’s lesson to his Son...

[MR_Anderson]

One day there was a young boy who got in trouble at school and his father had to come pick him up shortly after school started.

On the ride home the son explained that he had only treated the other boy the way he had, because all the other students expected it, and if he didn’t, he would become the new target of the abuse. The father didn’t say anything, he just nodded.

The father made a stop at the grocery store, and they both went in. He picked up some potatoes, eggs, milk, sugar, coffee grinds, and bacon.

When they got home he pulled out a large pot, a small kettle, and a frying pan. He had his son fill the pot and kettle with water, and then clean the potatoes and rinse off the eggs. Once completed, his father asked him to pay attention and learn.

The man let the pot, kettle, and pan start to heat. He poured some coffee grinds into the kettle, then he placed the potatoes and eggs into pot. Then the father took time to fry up the bacon.

By the time he was done with the bacon the water had done its job boiling everything else thoroughly. He had his son set the table for brunch.

As they ate, his father asked his son what he had learned. Feeling confident that his dad was going easy on him, he quickly replied that if he was strong over others that he’d get rewarded as he now had the day off from school and his dad made him brunch.

Saddened, the father shook his head.

The water represents the world. Sometimes it could be perfect for a nice cool bath, while at other times it will seem like it is on fire and you don’t want to be in it.

Most people are like potatoes and eggs. They go into the world as a soft or hard person and the world has a way of changing them.

Then there are some very few people who are like coffee where they actually change the world in which they are placed.

The son shocked at the revelation, and still not really trying to learn but instead find holes in the teaching asked about the other items they purchased.

The father much wiser than any gave credit answered, that coffee is often bitter, so making the personal choice to add a little bit of smoothness and sweetness into the world will go a long way into having more people like it.

As for the bacon...

{scrubbed}

[Vinyadan]

When I was but a little boy
my father said to me
come here and learn a lesson from
the lovely lemon tree

My son it's most important
my father said to me
to put your trust in what you feel
and not in what you see.

Lemon tree, very pretty
and the lemon's flower's sweet
but the fruit of the poor lemon
is impossible to eat.

Beneath that lemon tree one day
my love and I did lie
a girl so sweet that when she smiled
the sun rose in the sky

We spent that summer lost in love
beneath that lemon tree
the magic of her laughter hid
my father's words from me

One day she left without a word
she took away the sun
and in the dark she left behind
I knew what she had done

She done left me for another man
It's a common tale, but true
A sadder man but wiser now
I sing these words to you

Lemon tree, very pretty
and the lemon's flower's sweet
but the fruit of the poor lemon
is impossible to eat.

(Will Holt)

[Scarlet Knight]

"Yet here, Laertes! aboard, aboard, for shame!
The wind sits in the shoulder of your sail,
And you are stay’d for. There; my blessing with thee!
And these few precepts in thy memory
See thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportioned thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new-hatch’d, unfledged comrade. Beware
Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,
Bear’t that the opposed may beware of thee.
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
For the apparel oft proclaims the man,
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell: my blessing season this in thee! "

Shakespeare, Hamlet

[truemane]

If you can keep your head when all about you
...Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
... But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
... Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
... And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
... If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
... And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
... Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
... And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
... And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
... And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
... To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
... Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
... Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
... If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
... With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
... And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!
-Rudyard Kipling, "IF___"

I always loved this poem. and I especially loved the line about the game of pitch and toss, even though it's terrible advice. But I guess "If you can take 10% of all your earnings, and invest it in an Index Fund from a tax-advantaged savings account, and remember that time in the market beats timing the market..." doesn't quite have the same punch.

[sktarq]

If you can keep your head when all about you
...Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, ... And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!
-Rudyard Kipling, "IF___"

I always loved this poem..... doesn't quite have the same punch.

THIS.
It always been been a deeply powerful work for me.
I have it hanging on my wall next a picture of my father. I asked him for a framed copy of it for my 16th birthday and he was thrilled to oblige.
If you had not posted it I would have, knew that from the moment I saw the title of the thread.

[veti]

I always loved this poem. and I especially loved the line about the game of pitch and toss, even though it's terrible advice. But I guess "If you can take 10% of all your earnings, and invest it in an Index Fund from a tax-advantaged savings account, and remember that time in the market beats timing the market..." doesn't quite have the same punch.

The line says "winnings", not "earnings", which makes it pretty good advice in my opinion. If you're ahead at gambling, the money isn't really "yours" until you cash out. Before then, you should be able to lose the lot without flinching; if that distresses you, it's time to stop playing.

[truemane]

The line says "winnings", not "earnings", which makes it pretty good advice in my opinion. If you're ahead at gambling, the money isn't really "yours" until you cash out. Before then, you should be able to lose the lot without flinching; if that distresses you, it's time to stop playing.

The image starts with 'winnings' which implied to me that it's what they had before they get into the pitch and toss. But I guess it's true that, within the closed circle of that single sense-image, it's not crazy to assume that the 'winnings' has been acquired from prior turns of pitch and toss.

The sticking point, I guess, is 'beginnings' - is that 'when you started gambling' or like 'starting life from zero again.'

I always took it to mean "If you can bet everything you own and not complain if you lose" - which, the not complaining about the consequences of choices you made yourself is good. But betting everything you own is maybe not so prudent.

But I like your take on it. I had never thought of it like that. And you're right, it's good advice. When your vices start being problems, it's time to give them up.

[Manga Shoggoth]

See all, hear all, say nowt;
Fat all, sup all, pay nowt;
And if tha ever does owt for nowt, always do it for thisen.

(A Yorkshireman's advice to his son, emblazoned on several pint mugs of mine)

[Vinyadan]

It's not time to make a change
Just relax, take it easy
You're still young, that's your fault
There's so much you have to know
Find a girl, settle down
If you want you can marry
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy

I was once like you are now, and I know that it's not easy
To be calm when you've found something going on
But take your time, think a lot
Why, think of everything you've got
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not

(Steven Demetre Georgiou, a.k.a. Yusuf, a.k.a. Cat Stevens. He later commented that the father's reasons looked pretty weak, but he had no kids back then.)

[Zipper43]

I bet it's authentic that, in the closed circle of that unmarried sense-picture, it's now not crazy to anticipate that the 'winnings' then, you should be capable of lose the lot with out flinching if you may maintain your head whilst all about you...are losing theirs and blaming it on you

[Scarlet Knight]

Happy Father's Day to al the Dads out there!

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years." - Mark Twain