Anyone have problems switching from DM to player?

[Cocoapeanuts]

DMing for years, when you finally find someone else in your group willing to DM I jumped at it. But good lord is it a migraine. Trapped inside a dungeon, thrown against swarms we use oil and a torch to try and kill them only to discover it lights spider webs on fire and we all suffocate because there's no where for the smoke to go. And apparently as it's "non combat rounds" we weren't allowed to act for the entire minute while the flames grew and smoke spread. Yes we apparently stood in place for a solid minute watching smoke spread rather than running.

Honestly, it makes one never want to return to the player side.. I start to think the only fair DM im going to find is in a mirror. At least my players are enjoying our campaign and aren't getting murdered in a few minutes. Probably have to put this in the top 5 least enjoyable sessions I've had to play in.

[False God]

Sure, sometimes I run into bad DMs, or games that I'm not having fun in, but I do LIKE to play so sometimes I have to take a few lumps till things get going. Being a DM can be fun, but its also a lot of work, and sometimes I'll take a "MEH" game if it means I don't have to work.

[Batcathat]

Yeah, switching from DM to player isn't always an easy transition (and I imagine having someone used to DMing as a player can be a pain too). That being said, what you describe doesn't sound like a transition problem for you, it just sounds like bad DMing.

[Luccan]

Yeah, switching from DM to player isn't always an easy transition (and I imagine having someone used to DMing as a player can be a pain too). That being said, what you describe doesn't sound like a transition problem for you, it just sounds like bad DMing.

Agreed. I don't think 3e even has noncombat turns as an optional rule abywhere. It's certainly not a standard one. Has this person run any games before? If not, or if so but not much, this might simply be beginner error. As long as they're open to critique (and others at your table feel it was unfair) you may be able to steer them in a more sensible direction. Finding out why they're using those rules is the first step. I've had a few green DMs use optional/houserules they didn't fully understand because someone online made it sound cool. I'd also explain the importance of not taking away a player's agency, particularly in a life or death situation.

Edit: if they are experienced it may be a red flag, but talking is still the best way to go initially. And don't give up hope. Plenty of fair DMs out there, but the pool is still smaller and they get a bit more control of the rules, so the bad ones usually stick out more than a bad player.

[King of Nowhere]

then again, you say that your fellow players are not getting killed, so i assume your group survived that encounter. so it may just have been an intentionally difficult encounter

[Cocoapeanuts]

then again, you say that your fellow players are not getting killed, so i assume your group survived that encounter. so it may just have been an intentionally difficult encounter

The group I referenced not dying is the one I DM for, I'm playing with one of my players and some new people.
also, no it was a tpk. Suffocation. Dunno I've known the dude for a long time and have played in some of his other campaigns over the years I'm just mind boggled at the abuse the rules took last night and the obviously player death way they got leaned on. I'm aware 3.5 has non combat round times of 1 min but I can't see ending combat killing creature and ruling the fire used to immediately be on 1 min vs 6 sec rounds. That's just intentionally ruling against the players and their agency. Using a clear dislike of our actions to rule our death.

Also to other comments. In 3.5 section for a reason not playing 5e. I can't play babified low complexity d&d. It's actually just boring.

[Particle_Man]

Sometimes people rule, or house-rule, things differently than you would and you have to accept that.

But if this is more than that, an actual case of bad DMing, since you have known the guy a long time, maybe have an out-of-game conversation with him and ask why he ruled that way, how you think it was not fun for the group, and how there were other ways to rule it, and maybe see if you can find some way forward in the future with this guy as DM. It could be a "teachable moment" to help the guy become a better DM in the future. If not, find another DM, no harm, no foul.