PF - Worst Amalgam Monster

[unseenmage]

What are the worst two creatures to se the Amalgam (https://www.d20pfsrd.com/bestiary/monster-listings/templates/amalgam-creature-cr-special/) template to combine into a single monster to pit against a pair of 5th level adventurers? (A barbarian and a kineticist.)

I'm looking for the saddest, weakest, most pathetic amalgam of creatures to have them killmurder for fun and profit.

My first thought was kobold+goblin then I became too sad imagining such an abomination.

[unseenmage]

My IRL playgroup says Clockwork Zombie. I'm.having a hard time disagreeing.

[Psyren]

By "worst"/"saddest"/"most pathetic", you seem to be trying to elicit some emotional response from your players to the custom creature you're building - you know your players and what they would react to emotionally better than we do.

One fictional example that has resonated with a lot of people though:
https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/fma/images/4/4f/Nina_ChimeraForm.jpg

[Seto]

I'm not sure if you want your players to be sad about the pathetic being, or kill it for fun and profit.
It it's the former, like Psyren hinted, it would be a good idea to take a non-monstrous creature (a humanoid, or a noble magical beast, a Good outsider...) and fuse it with a really vile or disgusting monster... and make it aware of that, and really sad about it. Like, a Unicorn with the fur and fangs of a Dire rat.

If it's the latter, just pick something so pathetic it's funny. A shark with bird wings, but only half-developed lungs? A dire wolf head and tail, with a Gelatinous cube in between to fill in the body?

If you played Undertale, the Amalgamates are a good place to look for inspiration.

[SimonMoon6]

Owl + Bear

[Greg_S]

Dire Sloth (https://www.d20pfsrd.com/bestiary/monster-listings/animals/sloth/sloth-dire-tohc/) plus pixie is a decent one. Giant sloth with a pixie's face, perpetually staggered so the players are beating a helpless grotesque punching bag.

[Telok]

Chicken-drow-dryad-gelatinous cube-violet fungi.

[GrayDeath]

Sad as in "So bad its funny again": Gelatinous Skeleton".

Sad as in "People might feel a lot of empathy": Mold-Elf or maybe a Sloth pixie as mentioned above.

Worst as in "worst to face": Mindflayer-Gelatinous Cube-Ghost".
Mindsight, Mindblast, if it immaterial, can split if hit right, and eats both your Life Energy and brains.

[Dr_Dinosaur]

Chicken-infested Commoner + Gelatinous Cube = A melting person that occasionally disgorges a slimy chicken