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Emperor Demonking
2007-11-09, 12:50 PM
Let's make the rules of the gaming forum.

1. You can't wish that the wizard lost his memory.

Kurald Galain
2007-11-09, 01:13 PM
2. You can't eat crackers with lettuce on them, except on a tuesday.

PlatinumJester
2007-11-09, 01:16 PM
3: ToB is worth every penny you spend. The only way it could be better is if the Warblade didn't have to take 2 level 1 stances. And thats the only way :smallmad:.

SadisticFishing
2007-11-09, 01:18 PM
3: ToB is worth every penny you spend. The only way it could be better is if the Warblade didn't have to take 2 level 1 stances. And thats the only way :smallmad:.

4. Or if they clarified all the random badly worded stuff.

OzymandiasVolt
2007-11-09, 01:31 PM
4. Or if they clarified all the random badly worded stuff.

I am curious to know what these badly-worded things that have somehow eluded me when I read the book three times are, but thread derailment is bad.

5. If it exists, it is broken.

SadisticFishing
2007-11-09, 01:35 PM
(hrm. how about what allies are for White Raven things? Can you use Divine Impetus more than once a round (seems like a yes, but that's just stupid, and the way it's worded makes it seem like a once per round thing)? Is Mountain Tombstone Hammer actually not supposed to have any prerequisites? Does the extra damage from Strike of Perfect Clarity crit? Urm, there were more, but I can't remember them at the moment)

6. Try not to derail threads to turn them into something about the ToB.

Mr.Moron
2007-11-09, 01:40 PM
3: ToB is worth every penny you spend. The only way it could be better is if the Warblade didn't have to take 2 level 1 stances. And thats the only way :smallmad:.

What they included stuff for archery? I can think of some really neat stuff that could be applied with that system using ranged weapons, just gotta call them shots instead of strikes!

Zincorium
2007-11-09, 02:01 PM
7. Monkey Grip does not work that way.

TRM
2007-11-09, 02:02 PM
8. Unoptimization is not the same as Good Roleplaying.

Duke of URL
2007-11-09, 02:06 PM
7. Monkey Grip does not work that way.

7a. Monkey Grip is not from the Book of Erotic Fantasies.


8. Unoptimization is not the same as Good Roleplaying.

8a. Optimization is not the same as Bad Roleplaying.

TRM
2007-11-09, 02:09 PM
7. Monkey Grip does not work that way.
9. Monkey Grip is not from the Book of Erotic Fantasies.

But it should be.

Tyger
2007-11-09, 02:11 PM
10. They're called custom magic item creation guidelines!!! No you can not have a +20 sword for 1000 GP.

Freelance Henchman
2007-11-09, 02:14 PM
"The Shocker" and "Shocking Grasp" are not the same thing. Do NOT mistake one for the other.

AKA_Bait
2007-11-09, 02:20 PM
8b. Optimization is not the same as good roleplaying either.

11. No, they do NOT stack.

11a. Not even then.

12. Ok, ok, we get it. Batman Wizards win at life. Gotcha.

13. In any thread Pun-pun must be mentioned sometime within the first 2 pages.

14. Just because your group likes it better another way does not make it RAW.

15. Or give you free reign to call people names.

Techonce
2007-11-09, 02:22 PM
Change is always a bad thing.

Trying to fix broke rules will only result in more broke rules.

Alignment discussions never end in arguements.

AKA_Bait
2007-11-09, 02:43 PM
Alignment discussions never end in arguements.

That one would be good if you deleted the last two words...

GoC
2007-11-09, 03:05 PM
Change is always a bad thing.

Trying to fix broke rules will only result in more broke rules.

Alignment discussions never end in agreements.

Fixed.:smallbiggrin:

Dhavaer
2007-11-09, 03:35 PM
3: ToB is worth every penny you spend. The only way it could be better is if the Warblade didn't have to take 2 level 1 stances. And thats the only way :smallmad:.

After Warblade 3, take a level of Fighter (or Barbarian) then a level of Crusader. Then your next Warblade level will give you a 3rd level stance, and you'll also have 2nd level Crusader maneuvers.

Roderick_BR
2007-11-09, 06:39 PM
(...)Does the extra damage from Strike of Perfect Clarity crit?(...)
I need to re-read it, but I think somewhere it says that damage from any maneuver can't crit at all (so, no you can't crit a mountain tombstone strike for 2d6 x2 points of Con damage, for example.

16. Frenzied Berserkers are not allowed. Specially with Leap Attack. Period.

Magi_Ring_O
2007-11-09, 08:19 PM
17. The monk will lose to the wizard, unless the monk has "improved put the wizard at a severe disadvantage by not letting him have a spellbook so that I will win" as a feat.

AlterForm
2007-11-10, 12:01 AM
18: Psionics does not work that way. Seriously. RTFM.

MCerberus
2007-11-10, 12:04 AM
19. Do not try and combine everything from a fantasy setting with real-world physics or an Antimatter Catgirl Damn Crab will eat you.

Cruiser1
2007-11-10, 12:24 AM
17. The monk will lose to the wizard, unless the monk has "improved put the wizard at a severe disadvantage by not letting him have a spellbook so that I will win" as a feat.
20. The Monk will lose to the Wizard even if the Wizard doesn't have a spellbook (at least at low levels) because the Wizard sells his spellbook and buys wardogs with them, for a big dose of level1 cheese. :smallwink:

Karsh
2007-11-10, 12:35 AM
21. http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b226/Karsh_Silvermoon/Deathwheel.jpg

Dervag
2007-11-10, 12:38 AM
8b. Optimization is not the same as good roleplaying either.8c. Nor is optimization the same thing as bad roleplaying; in fact, there are no one-to-one correlations between good or bad optimization and good or bad roleplaying.

Xefas
2007-11-10, 12:45 AM
22. The act of hitting things reeks of Anime. So do names, and effective swordsmanship. In fact, all Anime is just a bunch of swordsmen with names hitting people!

Zincorium
2007-11-10, 01:06 AM
22. The act of hitting things reeks of Anime. So do names, and effective swordsmanship. In fact, all Anime is just a bunch of swordsmen with names hitting people!

I know you're being sarcastic, but anime does have entire series that are composed of people with funny names hitting each other. Not good anime by my yardstick, but it's there.

Really, I think the ToB-anime link is because for some reason the people who cry about it have decided that you're required to yell out the name of your maneuver every time you use it. And that you have spikey, oddly colored hair.

Cyclone231
2007-11-10, 01:19 AM
23. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.

Jack Zander
2007-11-10, 01:46 AM
24. Having the last post does not make you win the argument.

Rolaran
2007-11-10, 01:54 AM
25. In prestige classes, the loss of even a single spell level is a cataclysmic flaw somewhere on the level of forcing the character to relinquish all material possessions and become a monk.

25a. Okay, that was a little extreme. Losing a spell level is still slightly better than taking a level in monk.

26. The CW Samurai will die alone and unloved.

ocato
2007-11-10, 02:10 AM
Really, I think the ToB-anime link is because for some reason the people who cry about it have decided that you're required to yell out the name of your maneuver every time you use it. And that you have spikey, oddly colored hair.

You aren't?

Whoopsy-doodle!

Behold_the_Void
2007-11-10, 02:44 AM
27. Any information regarding 4th Edition is a terrible change that's going to suck and make the game more like anime/WoW/monopoly/whatever. However, every new scrap of information also mentally compels people to post continuously for pages about how and why it's happening, despite having no actual gameplay mechanics to look at.

Optional: people may, if desired, give excruciatingly specific reasons why mechanics we don't know much about will suck.

Bender
2007-11-10, 03:06 AM
23. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.

23a Afterwards, post the same thing again and again without adding new information

OneWinged4ngel
2007-11-10, 03:08 AM
I am curious to know what these badly-worded things that have somehow eluded me when I read the book three times are, but thread derailment is bad. You read it three times and didn't notice the atrocity of wording that is Iron Heart Surge? :smallconfused:

Anyways, as good of a supplement as ToB is, I can think of plenty of ways for it to be better.

Miles Invictus
2007-11-10, 03:11 AM
28. Third edition is the worst edition of D&D ever made. So are first, second, and fourth.

kjones
2007-11-10, 03:14 AM
28. Third edition is the worst edition of D&D ever made. So are first, second, and fourth.

roffle.

Here's a rather obvious one:

29. THF > TWF > S&B

Jack Zander
2007-11-10, 03:26 AM
30. No matter how incorrect your math is, Monkey Grip is never a good feat.

Kaelik
2007-11-10, 03:36 AM
24. Having the last post does not make you win the argument.

24b. Except when you make it, then it totally is.

PlatinumJester
2007-11-10, 05:08 AM
After Warblade 3, take a level of Fighter (or Barbarian) then a level of Crusader. Then your next Warblade level will give you a 3rd level stance, and you'll also have 2nd level Crusader maneuvers.

Crap on a stick. I'm level 6 already :smallfurious:.

31: Don't try and make a Chuck Norris style character because you'll fail.

32: Just because you have a Greatsword doesn't mean you are Cloud fromm FF7.

33: Weapon Focus is about as appealing as Dog Wank.

34: Fighter is no more than a 2 level template. Taking 3 levels shows your stupidity.

35a: If thou ist in in a core only game then thou must ignore the class known as monk. In fact ignore the monk class no matter what.

35b: If you really must be an Unarmed Fighter then thou must be an Unarmed Swordsage or the Monk from BoE because that has spells.

36: You can roleplay and powergame.

37: Dwarves and Humans are the best core races.

38a: Warlocks aren't as cool as they sound.

38b: Neither are Samurai.

38c: Neither are Swashbucklers.

39 - Sorcerers aren't as good as Wizards.

40 - Ghostwalk is the single most useless splat book ever.

41 - Caltrops is the most underated spell ever.

Tengu
2007-11-10, 05:24 AM
42 - sooner or later, someone will make the obligatory Hitchhiker's Guide To Galaxy pun.

daggaz
2007-11-10, 07:19 AM
43. Did somebody say pun-pun?

Setra
2007-11-10, 07:42 AM
34: Fighter is no more than a 2 level template. Taking 3 levels shows your stupidity.
34a.Unless you are not bothering to optimize said character

44. No one loves the bard, despite his 432 Diplomacy check at level 3.

skywalker
2007-11-10, 10:56 AM
25. In prestige classes, the loss of even a single spell level is a cataclysmic flaw somewhere on the level of forcing the character to relinquish all material possessions and become a monk.

25a. Okay, that was a little extreme. Losing a spell level is still slightly better than taking a level in monk.

No, dude, this is like rule two... I can't remember who runs around saying it all the time, but I'll get it out of the way for him:

THOU SHALT NOT LOSE CASTER LEVELS!

Rex Blunder
2007-11-10, 01:25 PM
45. Although in a text-based forum, where you have plenty of time to compose your message, you don't need to ever say "umm," you should do so. It's a great way to imply that the last post is so wrong-headed and stupid that you have never seen its equal. And it won't get the mods mad at you!

Examples:
"Umm, no."
"Ummm.... ok."
"Umm... what?"
"Your idea is... ummm... not good."
"ummmm...."

MCerberus
2007-11-10, 01:36 PM
46.Bloodthirsty is not an alignment that goes well with "neutral", neither is stupid. Do not try and play either. Bloodthirsty Stupid especially.

Gerrtt
2007-11-10, 01:37 PM
47. Straw-men make you a better logician. So do slippery slopes and rabbit chases.
47. A: For that matter, don't bother backing up anything you say with something coherent. Heaven forbid you give someone something to comment on or critique.

Lord Tataraus
2007-11-10, 01:41 PM
48. The wizard wins. No, not even then. No, not then either. Just drop it.

48a. The druid wins.

bugsysservant
2007-11-10, 01:42 PM
49. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.

:smallwink:

Nowhere Girl
2007-11-10, 02:11 PM
50. No skill is better than Diplomacy. None. No, not even that one. Whatever you're thinking of, no. Nothing can match a skill that eventually becomes more powerful at what it does than 9th-level spells.

51. Almost no DM will ever let you use Diplomacy as written.

Kaelik
2007-11-10, 02:42 PM
50. No skill is better than Diplomacy. None. No, not even that one. Whatever you're thinking of, no. Nothing can match a skill that eventually becomes more powerful at what it does than 9th-level spells.

50a. And by eventually we mean level 5.

Cyclone231
2007-11-10, 03:44 PM
23a Afterwards, post the same thing again and again without adding new information

23b To add to this, never read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. And, heck, if you're part of a little sub-conversation, don't both reading what the person you're quoting was responding to exactly what you just said.

In case you think I'm exaggerating, that happened in this very thread - see rule 8, reproduced below.

"8. Unoptimization is not the same as Good Roleplaying."

"8a. Optimization is not the same as Bad Roleplaying."

"8b. Optimization is not the same as good roleplaying either. "

"8c. Nor is optimization the same thing as bad roleplaying"

Assasinater
2007-11-10, 05:16 PM
52. Any thread with 'vs.' in its title creates a rip in the time-space continuum.

Lord Tataraus
2007-11-10, 05:40 PM
53. Bad roleplayers are not all powergamers
53a. Good roleplayers don't all suck at optimization.
54. Your DM is not as bad as the pyschoDM (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=23784&highlight=psychodm).

Moff Chumley
2007-11-10, 08:46 PM
55. 4ed will kill D&D irrevocably, even more than 3ed, which is also horrible. Never mind that everyone here plays it. It is still a horrible game.

56. WotC is evil, inept, stupid, and despicable. Never trust WotC.

57. Always ignore the opperative word in the thread title.

UserClone
2007-11-10, 08:59 PM
50a. Ummmm...:smallwink: Yeah, except truenaming. Owned!

Shas aia Toriia
2007-11-10, 09:10 PM
50b. Truenamin sucks, and is still not as good as diplomacy. :smallbiggrin:

Hyozo
2007-11-10, 09:12 PM
50a. Ummmm...:smallwink: Yeah, except truenaming. Owned!

50q: Of course, only not at all. Truespeak is only worth having if you will get 9th level arcane spells

58: You will probably be ninjaed.

Lemur
2007-11-10, 09:22 PM
59. Hyperbole makes everything better.

Suzuro
2007-11-10, 09:24 PM
60. "It's not that kind of party!"

Aquillion
2007-11-10, 10:27 PM
25. In prestige classes, the loss of even a single spell level is a cataclysmic flaw somewhere on the level of forcing the character to relinquish all material possessions and become a monk.

25a. Okay, that was a little extreme. Losing a spell level is still slightly better than taking a level in monk.This is only true for full casters. Swiftblade (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/prc/20070327), say, is a very good class for a gish.

Siric
2007-11-10, 10:51 PM
61. Rolling a 1 is always more probable then rolling a 20

Cyclone231
2007-11-10, 11:44 PM
62. Remember this important fact whenever you're in an argument: being an idiot isn't against the rules. Calling someone an idiot is. Take that however you want.

Winged One
2007-11-11, 02:29 AM
63. Running gags never get old.

64. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.

65. All threads in the OOTS section eventually get derailed and become Miko threads, without exception.

tyckspoon
2007-11-11, 02:52 AM
63. Running gags never get old.

64. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.


(Squinty Fry Futurama image macro here)

Bender
2007-11-11, 05:31 AM
49a Afterwards, post the same thing again and again without adding new information

66 If you feel important, double post rather than edit.

66a don't apologise for double posting, important people don't apologise

Bender
2007-11-11, 05:33 AM
64a Afterwards, post the same thing again and again without adding new information

Closet_Skeleton
2007-11-11, 05:50 AM
67. The random NPC traits table and the Deja Vu power are jokes.

68. The random NPC traits table and the Deja Vu power are jokes.

Grynning
2007-11-11, 05:57 AM
69. No matter how much time you spend crafting a melee build, no matter how much love you pour into it, it sucks, and people will tell you to be a Pounce Barbarian and/or something from the ToB.
70. Someone will likely make a wisecrack about rule number 69.

AlterForm
2007-11-11, 02:03 PM
71. If it can be said with words, it can be said better with anger/image macro/catgirl reference/pissing contest/an out-of-context definition.

Shas aia Toriia
2007-11-11, 02:24 PM
72. Never read through the entire thread, especially if it has more then 3 posts. Instead post on the very last page and hope nobody said the exact same thing as you 6 posts ago on the same page.

73. BATMAN!!!! always wins!

74. Beware of white text.

PlatinumJester
2007-11-11, 02:36 PM
61. Rolling a 1 is always more probable then rolling a 20

61b. Jesters First Law of Gaming - a natural 1 will always occur when you need it the least and a natural 20 will always occur when you don't need it.

75 - If Batman is a Wizard then Robin is a Sorcerer. And no-body wants to be Robin...except for that one guy. Yeah you know who I'm talking about.

76 - Don't be a ninja. You don't have Naruto style powers.Play a nija tyle rogue.

77 - Singing "Iron Man" whilst playing a Warforged is not original.

78 - Neither is singing "Fly by Night" whilst carrying Mountain Dew.

79 - Mountain Dew is the drink of nerds.

80 - He who kills another member of thy party must bringith thy Cheetos and Pretzels next session.

81 - If you think your being original with a concept then your not. Fax Celestis has already thought it up because he knows all.

Shas aia Toriia
2007-11-11, 02:47 PM
61b. Jesters First Law of Gaming - a natural 1 will always occur when you need it the least and a natural 20 will always occur when you don't need it.

76 - Don't be a ninja. You don't have Naruto style powers.Play a nija tyle rogue.

80 - He who kills another member of thy party must bringith thy Cheetos and Pretzels next session.

81 - If you think your being original with a concept then your not. Fax Celestis has already thought it up because he knows all.

Alas, all of these are so true. And Fax rocks. :smallamused:

PlatinumJester
2007-11-11, 02:51 PM
Alas, all of these are so true. And Fax rocks. :smallamused:

Fax Celestis has the uncanny ability to memorise every DnD rule he reads. He's like the Chuck Norris of remembering things.

bugsysservant
2007-11-11, 03:19 PM
82. Despite being able to type, play dungeons and dragons, and use a computer, we are all illiterate on this forum. Thus, in any debate about imbalance or RAW, it is always beneficial to point out rule zero with a statement about how "No competent DM would ever allow such a thing to happen." Untill you do that, we will all continue to allow Pun-Pun and other infinite builds because we have thus far been incapable of reading the first few pages of the DMG.

82 b. Bonus points if you can imply that the other poster is a bad DM/player for sugesting any potential cheese. All sugestions are always used: there is no such thing as a theoretical build in D&D.

Temp
2007-11-11, 04:52 PM
77 - Singing "Iron Man" whilst playing a Warforged is not original.

78 - Neither is singing "Fly by Night" whilst carrying Mountain Dew.

79 - Mountain Dew is the drink of nerds.

I have totally never done either #77 or 78.

And 79 is totally untrue.


...Totally.

Moff Chumley
2007-11-11, 04:53 PM
75 - If Batman is a Wizard then Robin is a Sorcerer. And no-body wants to be Robin...except for that one guy. Yeah you know who I'm talking about.

Aww, do we have to know?

83. Always remeber Nightwing's current avatar. Just in case... :smallwink:

84. You are 'unrealistic' or being 'indeffinate' if you say that the caster does not abuse the rules.

85. You are being a bad player if you play the wizard WotC intended it to be played, eg. mostly casting stuff like fireball and only casting polymorph as a last resort.

85a. Nobody at WotC has any idea what they're doing, and they want to kill gaming.

UserClone
2007-11-11, 05:05 PM
86c. No, they ALREADY HAVE!!! WoTC HATES REAL ROLEPLAYING!
87. TYPING WITH CAPS LOCK ON JUST GETS YOUR POST NOTICED, AND DOESN'T MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE AN ASS!!
50c. Sarcasm should never be used when joking about made-up forum rules.:smallwink:

Khanderas
2007-11-12, 03:33 AM
24. Having the last post does not make you win the argument.
24b24c: Having the last post before the mods lock the thread, counts as a double-not-win

Tengu
2007-11-12, 04:15 AM
88. People always assume you are playing either core DND or "kitchen sink" DND, even if you clearly state otherwise in your initial post. Expect advice such as "play a halfling with a riding dog" for your already made human knight, "be a wizard" when you're in Dark Sun, and "Stone To Mud will be very useful" when you're asking about defending against a siege in a game that's not even DND.

Khanderas
2007-11-12, 05:47 AM
88. People always assume you are playing either core DND or "kitchen sink" DND, even if you clearly state otherwise in your initial post. Expect advice such as "play a halfling with a riding dog" for your already made human knight, "be a wizard" when you're in Dark Sun, and "Stone To Mud will be very useful" when you're asking about defending against a siege in a game that's not even DND.
DM: You barely made it to the keep and the orcish horde screams in anger for not being able to catch up to you before you get to safety.
Wizard: I cast Stone To Mud on the wall.
Everyone else: Whaa ?!!

89. Quoting someone and make a faux gaming session is always cool and witty.

90. Misspelling exhaulted is mandatory.

91. You should always stay in caracter, or "roll" and bring out the dice for some wicked "roles". Like.. Role with the punches or the warriors roll should always be to defend the squishies

hewhosaysfish
2007-11-12, 10:17 AM
92. When a Paladin is confronted with a world-ending demonic power, he will always use this as an excuse to eat a baby.

Zincorium
2007-11-12, 10:21 AM
90a. Ditto for Gehsthalt.

Gerrtt
2007-11-12, 10:36 AM
93. Nobody will ever play a 100% core game. This is due mostly to the fact that we are a) illiterate, b) ignorant, or c) unable to agree with what WoTC considers game balance.

AlterForm
2007-11-12, 10:46 AM
94. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.

Setra
2007-11-12, 10:54 AM
95. If you look at a baby wrong your Paladin will fall

Human Paragon 3
2007-11-12, 11:02 AM
95. If you look at a baby wrong your Paladin will fall

Depends on how wrong...

Moff Chumley
2007-11-12, 01:00 PM
96. Fighters, Monks, Samurai, Bards, Rangers, Barbarians, Elves, and Half-Orcs are all useless. You are only aloud to keep your dignity if you play a human wizard, you filthy non-comnformist. You discust me. Blech. :smallyuk:

Kaelik
2007-11-12, 01:15 PM
96. Fighters, Monks, Samurai, Bards, Rangers, Barbarians, Elves, and Half-Orcs are all useless. You are only aloud to keep your dignity if you play a human wizard, you filthy non-comnformist. You discust me. Blech. :smallyuk:

96a. Grey Elf-Necropolitian Wizards only. And if you don't PrC at level 6, you still fail.

PlatinumJester
2007-11-12, 01:33 PM
97. The d12 is only useful for barbarians and warblades. However after several years of neglect it now decides to roll only 1 - 5s.

98 - Sending your familiar to deliver a touch spell against a barbarian is never a good idea.

99 - Being a paladin ruins it for everyone else.

100 - Yeah you may have 18 STR and CON but you have the Will save of a turkey.

Rolaran
2007-11-12, 02:05 PM
101 - For some reason, the paladin code of conduct triggers a latent killswitch deep within the minds of 90% of DMs, who immediately look to exploit it. Thus, if you are playing a paladin, you can expect to face at least one "eat this baby or I destroy the village" dilemma. For some reason, this is not triggered by, say, the fighter's inability to cast spells, so it is considerably less likely that your fighter will find himself thrown off a hundred foot cliff and be told that it was his own fault for never learning Feather Fall.

102 - However, it is his own fault for never learning Feather Fall, because everyone knows that fighters are weak and that the only valid class to play is a wizard.

Blanks
2007-11-12, 04:27 PM
103:
There is no correlation what so ever between minmaxing/powergaming/cheesing/outright cheating and bad roleplay. Actually if you powergame it is automatically assumed that you are a good roleplayer.

104:
If your DM allows only the books you all have access to, he is a cheating bastard that hates good roleplayers (see rule 103). Anything less than every splatbook in the world + all possible homebrews are limiting the players unfairly.

Bender
2007-11-12, 04:38 PM
90b rogues are silly, you're much better off playing makeup


96. Fighters, Monks, Samurai, Bards, Rangers, Barbarians, Elves, and Half-Orcs are all useless. You are only aloud to keep your dignity if you play a human wizard, you filthy non-comnformist. You discust me. Blech. :smallyuk:
otherwise, you can keep your dignity in silence, except for the bard of course, what's the point in being bard if you can't annoy people

Temp
2007-11-12, 04:49 PM
105:
No, it is not a balanced system. At all. Proof, you ask?

A Paladin may not [usually] eat a baby without falling, yet that baby has every right to eat the Paladin.

Halfling_Daniel
2007-11-12, 05:13 PM
105a: However, the baby isn't allowed to eat the paladin either if the baby is also a paladin.

hamishspence
2007-11-12, 05:18 PM
To paraphrase Kipling:
"Now these are the rules of the Gamer,
And who knows how they came about?
For the gamer that keeps them may prosper,
But the gamer that breaks them is Out!"

"Because of his age and his wisdom
Because of his gripe and his paw
In all that the Rules leaveth open
The Word of the DM is Law"

Doe anyone think that some other rules might be worth writing this way? If so, try coming up with your own.

TRM
2007-11-12, 08:24 PM
106. All jokes are still funny the 101th time.
107. Never, and I mean never, read through the entire thread if it has more than, say... three posts. Don't bother to make sure what you're posting is new! Just post it and hope that nobody points out that somebody made that exact same point six posts ago, on the same page.
108. Spell l-e-v-e-l

Edit: Oh darn! Ninja'd. My, I should have read the entire thread first :smallwink:

105b. The Paladin can however eat the baby if the baby is evil or a goblin.

Lord Tataraus
2007-11-12, 08:59 PM
42. Always make sure to use the correct number when adding to a list such as this

109. Always point out "funny" or "ironic" numbers in lists such as "7" and "42"

110. Always point out the posters who did not read past the third and scold them for not reading the 20 pages before them like everyone else

110a. Do so especially if you are one of the first three posters

110b. Do so especially if you, yourself did not read past the sixth post hoping others will not point out your mistakes

Soups
2007-11-12, 09:40 PM
111. The fighter is the absolute worst class ever. It doesn't even get any abilities, just worthless feats. It wouldn't suck if it had spell caster levels.
112. Samurai from CW is the worst class ever. It doesn't get as many feats as fighter.
113. Bard is the worst class ever. It has spell levels, and they suck, but doesn't have the feats the fighter has, and doesn't have fighter's BAB or fort saves like fighter.
(Can you smell the Irony?)
114. You should not read the first 6 posts. Because wording something slightly different, but saying the same thing makes you more original than the founding poster that has made your point.

Lord Tataraus
2007-11-12, 11:18 PM
115. As long as you reword your post correctly, possibly by injecting irreverent comments mid-sentence, and using confounding word choice (while insert seemingly random remarks in various forms, such as in parenthesis (as well as parenthesis, within parenthesis) to further confuse (as well as detract) from what you are really trying to say (which will lengthen your post as well as seem more than the idiot you are (this is not meant to offend anyone, but does bring up the topic that you might want to insert such offenses (nothing too extreme though) and latter apologize to further lengthen the post)) so as to make others believe you DO know what you are saying (on a slightly related note the previous capitalization (which is commonly referred to as yelling, but may also be interpreted as further emphasis (akin to using bold, italic, or underlined words (though the capitalization is much easier and doesn't require formating)).) was used to further emphasize my point) which is, of course, self-defeating (as are many attempts to make your self more or less clear (as is clear (or it may be unclear) in this case)).)) then you are allow to skip every post (that is, most of the thread) after the first six posts.

116. If you could keep track of everything that was said (as well as shorten it to make more since and realize the stupidity (though underlying genius)) so you are equipped (that is to say, able to) reveal that such was said earlier by another poster.

Jack Zander
2007-11-12, 11:26 PM
117. Failure to adhere to these rules does not have any forum consequences but remember, you will be the laughing stock of a bunch of fat 35 year old guys living in their parent's basements.

UglyPanda
2007-11-12, 11:40 PM
118. Rule 0 is trumped by your feet.

118a. Especially when it connects with the DM's groin.

MCerberus
2007-11-12, 11:44 PM
117a. and college kids with no life eating Cheetos.




*hides bag*

Rockphed
2007-11-13, 12:25 AM
24b24c: Having the last post before the mods lock the thread, counts as a double-not-win

24d: Unless you ARE the MOD, then you just win by default.

Jack Zander
2007-11-13, 01:24 AM
117a. and college kids with no life eating Cheetos.




*hides bag*

*raises hand* GUILTY!

Setra
2007-11-13, 01:34 AM
24d: Unless you ARE the MOD, then you just win by default.
24e: Unless you are a corrupted mod, in which case you lose by default because everyone hates you.

Of course no corrupted mods here but..

Emperor Demonking
2007-11-13, 11:45 AM
119: Only level 20 matters.

ZeroNumerous
2007-11-13, 12:07 PM
120: There are only three base classes. Cleric, Druid, and Wizard.

121: Never, and I mean never, read past the third post of a thread. Especially if the thread has twenty pages in it already. Just immediately jump to the last page and post hoping that no one points out exactly what you said was posted no less than six posts ago only worded slightly differently.

Emperor Demonking
2007-11-14, 11:26 AM
122: A fighter is never the best at what he does Apart from when he is

ZeroNumerous
2007-11-14, 11:43 AM
123: Pages 9 - 10 of Complete Warrior are completely blank for your sanity.

AlterForm
2007-11-14, 08:52 PM
13. In any thread Pun-pun must be mentioned sometime within the first 2 pages.



13b. Also, in any thread requesting the best build for a contest/arena match/competition/****-waving contest, Pun-Pun is always the best answer and must always be mentioned before the first page or the topic ends, whichever comes first.

Guildorn Tanaleth
2007-11-14, 09:26 PM
124. If you proceed, you are likely to be eaten by a grue.

Woot Spitum
2007-11-14, 09:49 PM
125. Yes, we get that your way of playing RPG's is better than everyone else's. Yes, some of us still play D&D in a manner you like to call "The wrong way." Yes, we understand that makes us horrible roleplayers and probably horrible people as well. But no matter how many times you repeat this, with responses to every single individual post quoted and rebutted in your next post, you aren't going to change anyone's mind.

Callos_DeTerran
2007-11-14, 10:27 PM
126. It's an acceptable practice to cry if your DM mentions getting monsters from the Tribble.

127. Pun-pun is not the answer to everything. No, not even if he makes an ability for it.

128. Thou shalt not take Weapon Focus by itself or never pick up Power Attack if your a fighter.

129. If you question if an act will make your paladin fall, then your DM will make sure the consequences do just that.

130. All things Lovecraftian will have a tendency to appear at least once, therefore have no qualms about killing anything with a tentacle or wet grasping orifice.

Turcano
2007-11-14, 10:40 PM
131. The world does not need another home-brewed catfolk race. We get it. You're a furry. Now stop it. Seriously, after the first thousand variants of this stupid race, how could you possibly be so arrogant as to think you can add anything original to the concept?

Nerd-o-rama
2007-11-14, 11:30 PM
132. Needs moar caster levels. No exceptions.

TimeWizard
2007-11-14, 11:47 PM
133) Don't bother mentioning Psionics, Incarnum, Pact/Shadow/Truename Magic, or any other kind of non-core new abilty. Nobody is allowed to use non-core and it is not as good as Arcane Magic.
133a) Unless you're talking about Tome of Battle. Which is of course more broken then wizards.
134) It is obvious that magicians should be superior to warriors, because magicians have magic, which is superior to martiality.

Jack Zander
2007-11-14, 11:48 PM
1335. Pun-pun always wins. Unless he is facing Chuck Norris. Then everyone loses.

EDIT: Ninja'd

TimeWizard
2007-11-15, 12:17 AM
136) It's ok to post again with no new information if you have something to say to someone, espcially if it is less then one line

@ Zander: You were assassin'd! :smalltongue: Unnecesary smiley:smallbiggrin:

Jack Zander
2007-11-15, 12:27 AM
138: You will be ninja'd most likely. Better play it safe and skip numbers in lists, even if you aren't ninja'd.

shadowdemon_lord
2007-11-15, 12:36 AM
139: The Damn Crab will get you, unless you have antimatter. Then the anti catgirl genocide squad will descend for their attack...and promptly die as they are all catgirls in proximity to real world physics.

140: Never talk about fight club outside of fight club.

141: Never talk about fight clube outside of fight club.

143: Their is no rule #143.

144: Fight club will always be referenced if someone make a thread about lists.

145: Never read through the entire thread, especially if it has more then 3 posts. Instead post on the very last page and hope nobody said the exact same thing as you 6 posts ago on the same page.

AlterForm
2007-11-15, 09:52 PM
146. A group of monks is called a "suckitude"

147. A group of wizards is called a "rockitude"

148. A group of druids and/or clerics is called an "OMFGWTFBBQitude"

BardicDuelist
2007-11-15, 09:59 PM
146. A group of monks is called a "suckitude"

147. A group of wizards is called a "rockitude"

148. A group of druids and/or clerics is called an "OMFGWTFBBQitude"

149. "The most Intelligent Party Ever" is called BROKEN-AS-HELL-ITUDE. (note to anyone who looked at that thread: we went through Tomb of Horrors with not perminant deaths at level 8)

Azerian Kelimon
2007-11-15, 10:02 PM
150. Some things are always mentioned in specific kinds of debates: See BoED and BoVD when discussing cheese or flawed perception of game designers, BoEF when discussing how a seemingly pathetic class destroys everything when used by teamplayers (Sacred Prostitue + Broken-as-hellitude = More-broken-than-hellitude), PHB when discussing how monks suck badly, and SpC when discussing how a wizard is cheesed out.