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de-trick
2007-11-13, 06:53 AM
1. Name your donkey mount butterscotch the wardonkey of doom

2. move the big baddy to attack and go "whahhahaha I'm the wraith King"

3.A critical miss on a annoying player and asked if I get sneak attack( I pointed and laughed at the guys face too)


all I can think of

SoD
2007-11-13, 07:09 AM
One that can't be planned...sadly.

One player couldn't make it, so I controlled her character, along with all other NPCs. In a fight, I start making rolls in the open. The players all watch my attack roll. 20. I say ''Ooh, possible critical...'' and rolled another 20 (I don't use death rolls) ''OK, that's a definate crit. Now for damage...'' All players are watching in horror, which I found slightly confusing. I roll whatever for damage, quite a bit though. One player asks ''Who is it attacking?'' I reply, confused: ''...the...enemy...?'' ''What? Aren't you rolling for the enemy???'' ''No. I'm rolling for the bard.''

Or, if a player accidentally burns down the hometown of another player, which they went to save, and nobody ingame knows this, except the player who did it: have him playing chess against some random NPC. Have the fire come into conversation over the game, but don't blame the player for it. End with ''you're quite the pyromaniac, aren't you? Oh, checkmate.''

Well, I laughed afterwards.

Mr. Friendly
2007-11-13, 08:02 AM
Hideous Laughter (http://www.systemreferencedocuments.org/35/sovelior_sage/spellsHtoL.html#hideous-laughter)?

Prometheus
2007-11-13, 10:55 AM
I had a magician-comedy routine:
Jacob the magnificiant appears to the roar of the carnival crowd. He is holding a deck of cards doing various tricks with it when he calls for an audience member. A lady who is clearly "his biggest fan" runs down screaming when he singles her out. "Pick a card, any card!" he shouts as he spreads them out in a fan spanning his two hands. She picks one and shows it to the crowd - a seven of diamonds. She promptly returns the card when Jacob who upon receives it his right hand and before returning it to the deck he looks at her in mock confusion: "Mam, I said pick one card and you gave me too" - smiling he shows two cards where her one was a four of diamonds and a three of diamonds. He repeats the trick but this time she draws an Ace of Spades. Upon it return he ends up with two cards, each with half an ace of spade printed on it. He sighs tearing each in half down the center and aligning the jagged edges of the printed half together. He wets his fingers with his tongues and rubs the edges between those fingers as it becomes whole again top to bottom. He grins, signs it, and gives it to the screaming fan.
The next trick he calls up a kid who doesn't want to be there and is constantly rolling his eyes. Jacob asks him to think of a card any card in the deck. "Think carefully now! You've got to be concentrating on it hard for the magic to work...You're just not picturing it well enough! Here hold this and it will help you remember!" as he passes the boy his card. The boy runs back into the stands excited.
Next he calls some assistants to help him make a quick oil fire, which he walks through completely unharmed. As smoke lifts off of him he winks and says "Goog thing I worse my fire-proof clothing today or this would be a different kind of show!" "But these can all be illusion right? I could have half a dozen tricks up my sleeve and you didn't pay for that!" he says as he empties a suit of fullplate, a unicycle, two buckets, a rope, and a live chicken from his sleeve. "I couldn't say, interact with an illusion could I? I wonder..." He next waves his hand as he mock creates/summons the illusion of a large red dragon in the middle of the ring. Promptly, the enormous dragon breathes fire all over the magician and swallows him in chunks, with charred bones flying out of his mouth. There is a moment of silence before somewhere amongst the crowd a loud voice says "****ing incredible isn't it?" and walks out into the middle unharmed. He grabs a bone and tosses it into the air as the illusory dragon bounds after it and disappears as it passes through the audience. Finally to prove his powers go beyond his own talent for showmanship he calls a random farmer from the crowd down, and hypnotizes him into donning the suit of armor, and riding the unicycle across the robe spanning the two buckets and with the chicken wandering below him. "Thank you and enjoy the rest of the show!"

But a lot of the comedy the players are responsible for: Dominating a soldier that was fighting them, interrogating him, drinking him silly, ordering him to strip, and send him to the nearest down on a donkey. About half a week later, they did the same thing to someone else. The town must have been confused.

Or when the armored dwarf first got covered in sap than covered in pollen. He looked like an angry dandelion with all the pollen clinging to him.

BRC
2007-11-13, 10:59 AM
Theres a running joke in my group where if we get caught anywhere were not expected (like in the BBEG's hideout) we always claim that were exterminators here about a termite problem, if asked why were so heavily armed the following is always said.
"After running into a dire cocroach nest you take every precaution you can!"
After which somebody cries
"We lost five men down there!"