Is This Even Possible?

[Skysaber]

Ok, so while doing some plane hopping, a party of D&D adventurers end up in a modern world. Lots of dust got blown off of D20 Modern books.

One of the players was a big fan of Harry Dresden. So he convinced the party to set up shop similarly, and yes, it says "Wizard" in the phone book.

So the DM decides to throw us a curveball. Our next client is an actress who did a photo shoot a long time ago that she's not proud of, 'nuff said, alright? But it got sold and by now it's on tons of websites, etc, etc.

So she figured magic boys are her only chance to erase this bit of sordid history. The price is high enough to be very appealing, so we'd like to take the case if we could actually fix anything.

We've got a wizard, a cleric, an artificer and a warlock, all 10th+. The artificer and warlock actually compete in the "I can make anything", and "Oh, yeah? I can make more anything than you!" contest with UMD.

If there is anything the D&D magic system can do, we've got a fair shot at doing it. With multi-planar access, we can buy anything we don't make ourselves.

The question is, is there anything we can do?

Our first thought was Wish, but the DM said some very discouraging things about that. In short, we'd be forced to go "Extra Effort" and that would carry with it unknown costs that none of us want to face.

Is there anything D&D magic can do to erase a file that's already on thousands of sites on the internet?

[Wintermoot]

Ok, so while doing some plane hopping, a party of D&D adventurers end up in a modern world. Lots of dust got blown off of D20 Modern books.

One of the players was a big fan of Harry Dresden. So he convinced the party to set up shop similarly, and yes, it says "Wizard" in the phone book.

So the DM decides to throw us a curveball. Our next client is an actress who did a photo shoot a long time ago that she's not proud of, 'nuff said, alright? But it got sold and by now it's on tons of websites, etc, etc.

So she figured magic boys are her only chance to erase this bit of sordid history. The price is high enough to be very appealing, so we'd like to take the case if we could actually fix anything.

We've got a wizard, a cleric, an artificer and a warlock, all 10th+. The artificer and warlock actually compete in the "I can make anything", and "Oh, yeah? I can make more anything than you!" contest with UMD.

If there is anything the D&D magic system can do, we've got a fair shot at doing it. With multi-planar access, we can buy anything we don't make ourselves.

The question is, is there anything we can do?

Our first thought was Wish, but the DM said some very discouraging things about that. In short, we'd be forced to go "Extra Effort" and that would carry with it unknown costs that none of us want to face.

Is there anything D&D magic can do to erase a file that's already on thousands of sites on the internet?


Surprisingly few "erase computer file" spells in quasi-medieval D&D.


Given your set up, I would start with taking a lightning elemental and a Modron and a bunch of wands or traps of modify memory and using your Artificer and Warlock to crossbreed them into some kind of Internet Elemental to release into the Web to go find and destroy the files. If you want to show your DM an idea of what you want, queue up the electrical gremlin scene from gremlins 2. How this is going to fix the issue of tens of thousands of fan-boys who have already seen it and remember it is a different question. Perhaps instead of simply removing it, you can get your elemental to subtly remake the image. A tweak to the eyes here, a big of brown hair under a blonde "wig" there and then you can hire another actress to come out and claim that the picture is them and they were hired to masquerade as the other actress. Wait... why hire another actress come to think of it. Bring in a succubus or other talent, then they can act the part and be sent home when you need them to disappear. Or make a flesh golem that will never betray you to do it. plus: bonus sexbot. Then you've got a believable and provable story to clear her in the public's eye. Plausable deniability. deepunfake it.

Even if you can't get the custom internet elemental by your GM, using a succubus as a "fake" coming out and claiming to be the real person in the pictures should do it. Just not as elegant or foolproof.

Of course, you should expect it to go rogue and end up being a new problem you need to solve later on. But that's tomorrow's problem.

[Tzardok]

Sounds like someone should research a variant of Awaken for this. Awaken Computer Virus or something like that.

[ksbsnowowl]

This sounds right up the ally of an Eldritch Machine (Eberron Campaign Setting, p. 273).

[noce]

You have two options:

Ask the DM how to do it, using Divination or Clairsentience; an example is Hypercognition, which explicitly states "The nature of the knowledge you gain might include even a conclusion concerning a dilemma that your conscious mind is unable to arrive at".
Ask her how much money she got from the photoshoot back at the time, and require to get paid in advance. Then travel back in time and find her. Convince her that herself sent you back in time to stop her from taking that photoshoot, and give her the money she would have earned from it. Then go back to present time. If you're asking, yes, there's a spell for this: http://archive.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/pg/20030409b

[Telonius]

Weird idea that just might possibly work - can spells be transmitted through internet connections? Release a new "not-proud-of" photo that has a Geas or a Suggestion that makes anybody viewing it want to delete it plus the other one from any database they have access to.

[daremetoidareyo]

Curse people who see the video to die a la the ring.

[Wildstag]

Surprisingly few "erase computer file" spells in quasi-medieval D&D.

Surprisingly few computer-related spells in D20 Modern as well.

[Wintermoot]

Weird idea that just might possibly work - can spells be transmitted through internet connections? Release a new "not-proud-of" photo that has a Geas or a Suggestion that makes anybody viewing it want to delete it plus the other one from any database they have access to.

Like. Upvote. Good thinking outside the box.

[TalonOfAnathrax]

I can't think of anything that fits perfectly, but here are several ideas on how you could cobble something together:

1: Manual shutdown
Do you have a feat slot available, the ability to craft intelligent items that grant feats, or the ability to access Dark Chaos Shuffle? Do you have the ability to create servants of some sort?
You could use some of the feats from Dragon 359 (Ears of the Mage, Name of the Mage) to make her name "taboo", sort of like what Voldemort does in the Harry Potter novels. This would allow you to detect anyone talking about her. You could then create some sort of tireless construct (I'd suggest something stealthy like a geared-up Shadesteel golem, perhaps commanded by an intelligent item whose Purpose is removing these pictures from the world and staying hidden) or creature (a Spellstitched stealthy undead you control - perhaps a Sepulchral Thief from Cityscape, if you can get one?). This being would then check on each instance of her name being said, and manually remove the pictures (the easiest method would be by mind-controlling whoever has them and making them delete the pictures, before wiping their memory of them + of this event). To remove false positives, suggest she change her name or start using a nickname all the time.
Review: This is unfortunately a slow method. However it has the advantage of being very hands-off once it is set up. If you don't like the idea of creating a willing sentient slave, this whole operation becomes stupidly risky (can you really give a free-willed wandering golem good enough commands to handle every eventuality it'll come across without being discovered?).

2: Manual Shutdown v2, now with even fewer ethics but better targeting
Same general idea as the previous solution, but using different methods. Start with an Elemental Weird as a base, because they've got the information-gathering down pat. Have it constantly be searching for people looking at the image, and have it cast Demand on them to make them delete it or ignore it. I don't know how you can get an infinite number of Demand spells per round, but with a custom item you can definitely get it once (or even twice) per round. That should be a good start on removing it from everywhere.
The main problem might be finding an Elemental Weird, enslaving it, and turning it into something with endless patience and focus without removing its abilities in the process of turning it into a Construct or Undead. Lesser Restoration can remove fatigue, but I'm not sure how to ensure constant perfect focus...
Review:This is the easiest solution, IMO. Not perfect, but Elemental Weirds are so cheesy and omniscient (especially if your GM lets Air Elemental Weirds know everything that air touches) that they can theoretically accomplish this. Unfortunately, AFAIK this requires enslaving a sentient being.

3: Skynet (metaphorically)
Try to figure out how the internet works, fail, and instead focus on figuring out who can control the internet. Start a campaign of mind-control over key industry figures (and even key politicians if you want to strengthen legislation to protect victims of photo-spreading) and make them manually do the work for you.
Review: This is a slow, risky, and very work-intensive method. It's basically starting a massive adventure/campaign just for her! And most of D&D's effective mind-control spells aren't very subtle (except Mindrape), so you'll likely be stuck using "nudges" or trying crazy plans like "impersonating Jesus and coming as a vision to various religious targets".

4: Help her reinvent herself
Straight-up rewrite her entire life. Get her a phylactery of change (new body), a new name, etc. Go around rewriting people's memories and breaking into archives to make any paperwork fit the new name and appearance.
Review: The ethics of this are extremely questionable, and she may balk at rewriting the memories of her loved ones, etc. And there's always the risk you'll miss someone important, etc. On the other hand, it could theoretically be a lot easier to do than the previous solutions, especially if she's okay with moving and restarting most of her life.

[Malphegor]

Legend Lore the location of the server it’s stored in. Multiple may be needed.

Destroy.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Time to whip up a magical computer virus. Hire a hacker to craft a virus program designed to find and replace picture and video files based on visual recognition with files you want. Then magically enhance the program (not the physical drive) as a self-resetting, repeating trap with divination spells to help it find those files more efficiently, and the files it replaces them with wipe the memories of the pictures you want to erase for anyone who sees them.

Sure, a regular mundane virus could do a halfway decent job, but you'd still have memories floating around.

That, or make the virus into a sentient AI so it can be upgraded later and used for other things, and it could defend itself, as well. Probably a bad idea, given how often these things go vastly wrong in fiction. Which would make for fantastic problems to build the campaign around later on, with magic Skynet taking over the world...

[Eurus]

Slightly different tactic: could you convince people that it's not her? You could make a body double of her to "prove" it, or enchant someone into claiming to have faked the photo... you could even make her forget that she actually did it.

My other idea would be custom spell research, because this seems like the kind of situation where that would be appropriate.

[daremetoidareyo]

make the online photos into a self resetting trap of bestow curse: blindness

[MaxiDuRaritry]

make the online photos into a self resetting trap of bestow curse: blindnessThen set up a business where you can fix them for a price?

[edit] You could also use alter self on someone to make a body double from a good actor or create a simulacrum. Call a nationwide news station and have the look-alike "confess" to making money by pretending to be the client. See if you can't get the pictures removed that way. Best done if you have both the original and the double in on the interview as "proof" that they're not the same.

[edit 2] Ah, ninja'd. Still a good idea, though.

[Maat Mons]

You could rewrite the client's memories so she thinks she came to you with an easier job.

[Wintermoot]

You could rewrite the client's memories so she thinks she came to you with an easier job.

end thread. best solution yet. one modify memory spell and boom. profit.

[Troacctid]

One of the alternative uses of bestow curse is to make it so that observers do not recognize the target, even if they would otherwise know her. It shouldn't be too much of a stretch to tweak it to apply to just images of her instead. Of course, it would screw up every photograph and video that's ever been taken of her, which, if you're an actress, maybe it's not great for the director to see you on the film and say "Who the hell is that and where is my star?" But look, it's better than hitting her with an unname, which is the most obvious way of solving the problem. She should be grateful.

[Bronk]

I like the time travel idea. The spell is a level 9 though, so maybe take a jaunt in the plane of time?

Can you somehow cast antipathy on the image so that it works with every copy?

How about this... Awaken's target is animal, or tree. It doesn't say the tree has to be a plant, so try to cast it on a computer data tree. Have whoever casts it learn some programming language, and designate that as its second language. It'll get plant traits, but that's the DM's problem to figure out. Be sure to cast it maximized and/or extended if you can for added intelligence. Set up a paypal account for it so it can get paid, tape up a smiley face on its terminal, put a fedora on top, and hang a trench coat on the computer chair. Maybe put Mavis Beacon typing instruction on the next computer over to be its secretary... Finally, make it a partner in your wizard detective business, and send it to do your dirty work.

[Quertus]

4: Help her reinvent herself
Straight-up rewrite her entire life. Get her a phylactery of change (new body), a new name, etc. Go around rewriting people's memories and breaking into archives to make any paperwork fit the new name and appearance.
Review: The ethics of this are extremely questionable, and she may balk at rewriting the memories of her loved ones, etc. And there's always the risk you'll miss someone important, etc. On the other hand, it could theoretically be a lot easier to do than the previous solutions, especially if she's okay with moving and restarting most of her life.

And here I thought I was the only one likely to come up with this style of solution.

Not surprised to see people beat me to mentioning time travel.

But all least i still get to be first to suggest…

Ask the GM what the DC is to solve this problem through code, use D&D massive skill boosting spells / custom items to hit the DC. (Doesn't change that people already saw it)

Mindrape her to no longer have a problem with the pictures. Problem solved.

[Telonius]

Another option: I see from the OP that "it got sold." So the pictures in question, are they just being pirated, or are they actually being licensed to the the sites? If it's actually being licensed, it means the person who owns it now is (presumably) making tons of money from it. So, if ownership of the thing is really what's causing the issue, you could lean into that angle. Use Suggestion (or just diplomance) the person to take the pics down, or sell it back to her at a massive discount.

[JoeNapalm]

Good thing you have multi-planar travel, because I'm pretty sure this is how this world ends.


-Jn-
Ifriti Sophist

[Eurus]

It occurs to me that some of these solutions are getting into Evil Genie territory, which isn't a bad way for a story about a movie star visiting a wizard to end (and very amusing to hear), but I feel like we could use an explanation of the party's motives and goals in this whole situation to figure out what a realistic solution looks like...

I mean, Maat Mons basically hit the nail on the head. A party with access to phenomenal magic powers presumably has easier ways to make money!

[Biggus]

You mentioned d20 Modern books, according to TV Tropes this one includes rules on how to send spells over the Internet: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urban_Arcana

[Zanos]

The simplest way to do this is probably to ask your DM for a skill check to program a computer worm that removes the content from the internet. Surely that's close to impossible with normal d20 modern DCs, but for high level D&D characters, augmented by magic items and spells, you could easily hit a modifier of + several hundred to your craft(code) or profession(programmer) check.

The highest DC d20 modern has for overcoming a computer security system is DC 40, so...

The RAW but annoying method is to use divinations to locate every computer/person with this data an neutralize them.

[Smegskull]

If you find all the source servers there is a Degauss spell in D20 modern that erases all computer files

If you can time travel you don't need to convince her not to do the shoot there is a "Camera Shy" spell in D20 modern that stops people showing up in photographs.

[Kitsuneymg]

What other d20 books can you get ahold of? Just 3.5 and Modern?

A time travel spell and stopping the shoot from happening seems pretty easy.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

What other d20 books can you get ahold of? Just 3.5 and Modern?

A time travel spell and stopping the shoot from happening seems pretty easy.Just make sure to check the lottery numbers before you head back.

All the lottery numbers.

[Seward]

Legend Lore the location of the server it’s stored in. Multiple may be needed.

Destroy.

Unfortunately given how the internet works, cloud storage works and how porn works (people download to local devices) there will be a bazillion file locations scattered all over the world.

Not a terrible idea if you'd caught it before it was distributed and there were relatively few copies. Impractical if the information has been shared.

[Maat Mons]

If you go with a time-travel option, make sure to take payment upfront. Because when you come back to the modified timeline, she won't know what you're talking about when you ask for money. Also, you'll need to carefully consider how you'll kill the extra versions of yourself who never got hired to travel back in time.

[Wintermoot]

Unfortunately given how the internet works, cloud storage works and how porn works (people download to local devices) there will be a bazillion file locations scattered all over the world.

Not a terrible idea if you'd caught it before it was distributed and there were relatively few copies. Impractical if the information has been shared.

Indeed. Based on some of the surprising responses in this forum compared to what I assumed was a baseline understanding of how the intarwebs work, my new first suggestion is "determine how the DM thinks the internet works" and base your solution off of that.

[Quertus]

Also, you'll need to carefully consider how you'll kill the extra versions of yourself who never got hired to travel back in time.

If time travel worked that way, why not keep them around as allies?

[Zanos]

Indeed. Based on some of the surprising responses in this forum compared to what I assumed was a baseline understanding of how the intarwebs work, my new first suggestion is "determine how the DM thinks the internet works" and base your solution off of that.
You don't need to destroy every copy in existence to make something very, very difficult to find. You could probably just edit some of the more popular SEAs to bury the results from the public internet more or less permanently. Making something unfindable is a lot easier than removing it from existence.


If you find all the source servers there is a Degauss spell in D20 modern that erases all computer files

If you can time travel you don't need to convince her not to do the shoot there is a "Camera Shy" spell in D20 modern that stops people showing up in photographs.
I've never understood why almost every tabletop game with technology spells has this spell that's really not all that much better than a blunt instrument and a careless hand.

If you have physical access to a machine, destroying the information on it is trivial.

[Quertus]

Indeed. Based on some of the surprising responses in this forum compared to what I assumed was a baseline understanding of how the intarwebs work, my new first suggestion is "determine how the DM thinks the internet works" and base your solution off of that.

Oh, it made me laugh, it made me cry. Sad but true.


I've never understood why almost every tabletop game with technology spells has this spell that's really not all that much better than a blunt instrument and a careless hand.

If you have physical access to a machine, destroying the information on it is trivial.

Curiously, "that file magically disappeared" and "somebody smashed my computer with a rock" have a few differences. Including how likely / quickly someone is to notice, and how likely retrieval methods are to work.

[Seward]

Well also, few files are stored on a smashable device these days.

Your cell phone can be set to automatically share to cloud streaming video, photos etc. Plus lots of stuff accesses your phone without you even knowing. It's even more true with workstations unless very carefully hardened (air barriers are best, but if you have a camera compromised pointing at your screen....)

Still as an earlier poster pointed out, we can't get the equivalent of rolling a 40 outcome on a skill check in the real world. Maybe Hollywood Hacking is possible at skill levels that need magical assistance AND being one of the best pure skill-based hacker in existance to achieve.

Given that I once reinvented somebody who had achieved character retirement by being erased from timestream from a sock behind a dryer with an Entropy mage in World of Darkness, anything is possible. (I postulated it was more likely that he'd been kidnapped and all records removed than he'd actually been eliminated from time and space, and "proved" it by "finding" a sock behind a dryer that belonged to him. Technically I created that sock with my Matter dots, and then convinced the universe my reality is true by using my much larger number of entropy dots plus blowing a lot of raw power on the effort, backed up mechanically and with dice...and consequences. The player changed the personality of his character to match the reality I created, how I saw him rather than how he was, which I thought was very good sportsmanship since he told me later he was trying to stop playing that guy. Oops. But maybe he liked his new version better, since he continued another year)

While d20 tends to be less free-form than Mage the Ascension, higher tiers of skill and magic can often do stuff on similar scale.