My friends are thinking of trying out DnD for the first time

[Detective]

Hi all, a strange day happened and my friends started talking about trying to set a game up.

Problem is? We as a group do not know where to start. What books do we need to get for both player and DM to start, and any other tips? I am familiar with how the game is played due by learning the rules prior to play online, but I know nothing about the DMing part, nor would I proclaim to be a know it all

P.S: I already have a worry with one of them, as she argued with the one who thought about being the DM about how the elves are supposed to be like in the world. Don't want it to end up with her clashing with the DM over stuff she disagrees with.
She also claims to be a rule-stickler though, and if I recall? There is a rule out there that says the DM is the one with the final say or something like that. If any of you know where it is in the books, that might help to make her calm down. Might :redface:

[Nidgit]

Most players don't need anything, as class/race/etc. information can be found fairly easily online. You as the DM should definitely have the Player's Handbook and should consider reading the Dungeon Master's Guide. Everything else is supplements that can enhance your game but definitely aren't needed to get started.

[Kane0]

Hi all, a strange day happened and my friends started talking about trying to set a game up.

Problem is? We as a group do not know where to start. What books do we need to get for both player and DM to start, and any other tips? I am familiar with how the game is played due by learning the rules prior to play online, but I know nothing about the DMing part, nor would I proclaim to be a know it all

P.S: I already have a worry with one of them, as she argued with the one who thought about being the DM about how the elves are supposed to be like in the world. Don't want it to end up with her clashing with the DM over stuff she disagrees with.
She also claims to be a rule-stickler though, and if I recall? There is a rule out there that says the DM is the one with the final say or something like that. If any of you know where it is in the books, that might help to make her calm down. Might :redface:

Absolute minimum? Free online rules plus some dice, or there are online rollers plus free phone apps that do that too. If you're not sure what to do try DMguild for a free starter module you can use which might even have pregenerated characters for the players to use instead of bothering with making their own (although that is a fun part of the game in its own right).

It's a collaborative game, the rules are there to support the narrative rather than the other way around. The DM has final say, though there are guidelines for consistency's sake. Many players come to the table with pre-existing notions that need to be identified in order to work with or around, and on the other side of that coin many have zero expectations and no genre-savviness.

If you have fun, then take a look at buying books (Players handbook, DM Guide, Monster Manual are 'core', everything else are either adventures or supplemental material)

[Greywander]

The bare minimum: Player's Handbook

The core rules: Dungeon Master's Guide and the Monster Manual

"Expansion packs" with more player options and optional/variant rules: Xanathar's Guide to Everything and Tasha's Cauldron of Everything

More monsters and monster lore: Volo's Guide to Monsters and Mordenkainen's Tome of Foes

Start by running the rules as-is; don't try to tweak the rules until you've played with them enough to have a good understanding of them.

The DM has the final say in anything, but the DM should also listen to what a player has to say and consider if what the player is asking for should be fine or not. Sometimes it's not a problem to look up a rule and verify that you know how it works, but sometimes it's better to keep the action moving. In the latter cases, the DM should make a ruling as best they can, and make a note to look up the actual rule after the session. As the DM, you can choose to roll back and change things if the actual rule would have had a significantly different outcome, or you can choose to stick by your ruling for that one time but resolve to run the rule correctly from that point on.

The biggest thing to understand is that you're all on the same team, the DM included. You're all there to have fun, not to "win". It's not a competition between the players and the DM. As the DM, you should consider allowing players to have their cool moments, even if it completely ruins what you had planned. It's okay for the players to have an easy win from time to time, especially if they understand how dangerous the situation was; it makes them feel powerful and/or clever to overcome a dangerous obstacle so easily. As a player, you should make sure that your character and their actions aren't detracting from the fun of the other players. It can be helpful to have a "session 0", where you discuss what each of you is looking for in the campaign so you can all properly align your expectations. Session 0 can also be a good time for creating the player characters, allowing the table to work together to create interconnected backstories that fit into the DM's setting.

For DMing, a good tip is to only jot down some vague notes and try to improvise based on those notes. Time spent carefully preparing is often wasted as the players inevitably go off the rails, usually unintentionally. Anything you do prepare that doesn't get used can be reused elsewhere. For example, you can create a list of NPC names, and just pull the next name off the list whenever the players ask for an NPC's name. That way, you have a list of names ready, but they're not yet attached to specific characters that the players might not meet. That map of the sewers can be reused as the castle, or a bandit stronghold, or wherever the players end up going. Using a premade module can also take a lot of the burden off of the DM, since the material is already prepared.

Lastly, PC death will happen eventually. Be prepared for it. It can be rough on a new player, but the DM can help by making it a memorable scene. And actually, this reminds me of another piece of advice I've heard: don't interrupt the villain's monologue, it's the DM saying goodbye to their character.

That's all I can think of for now. Hopefully that helps.

[Anymage]

The basic rules are all you need. They're online here (https://www.dndbeyond.com/sources/basic-rules) and in PDF form here (https://dnd.wizards.com/articles/features/basicrules). They're also comparatively limited, but are a great try before you buy option. If you pick up more books with more options it's always easy to add them in later.

Player's Handbook, Dungeon Master's Guide, and Monster Manual are the three core books. PHB is understandably the player option book, with more different ways to play the various classes (the basic rules only have one subclass for each class, while the PHB gives at least three for each), plus the full list of spells as well as options like feats. DMG has more in-depth info about how to put together your world as well as various ideas to make it your own, while the MM has more monsters including a few that are iconically D&D. There are other books with more options of various types, but it might help to not try overwhelming yourself too early in.

What does DMing involve? I'm sure you can find some free sample adventures for low level characters around online. You simply describe what the world contains and how it reacts to the PCs. In practice this is made much easier with preparation, so you know what's around. And sometimes a heavy load of improvisational skills will help. (Partially because the players will find the damnedest ways to go that you've never thought of. Partially because when they do this, it helps to be able to redirect them back to places you've planned instead of feeling compelled to have the full world prepared from the first session.) Still, while it sounds like a lot of work, you don't have to do everything perfectly in order to do a good job. So long as everyone - including yourself - is enjoying themselves, you're doing okay.

And finally, sometimes it does help to listen to other players since they can often have background information that's handy or a better grasp of the rules than you do. In the case of the elf player, it's worth asking where they heard what they heard. If it's just minor fluff, it's worth listening and being open to ideas. Note, however, that D&D elements are not necessarily the same as their inspiration from elsewhere. Tolkien's elves, for instance, are just generally better than you at basically everything. That would make them too strong an option as a playable race if kept to, so D&D elves are more toned down. If it's a plot setting and she wants Rivendell where elves have become strong and high level through their long lives, be willing to humor her. Her elf PC is still comparatively young and low level to be able to run with the rest of the party, however.

[Bobthewizard]

I would get a copy of the players handbook and the Starter set, and some extra dice. Lost Mines of Phandelver is a great adventure for a group to learn how to play together. The Essentials kit might work in place of the starter set but I haven't played Dragon of Icespire Peak.

Whoever is going to DM should read the rules in the Starter set a few times so they can help others. Make characters together your first session and learn as you go.

[Leon]

Limit to Core/SRD, no variants/ optional rules (Ie feats).
Have a Session Zero where such things a how elves are defined can be discussed and remind the potentially problematic player that the DM is the final Arbitrator on what goes.

[KorvinStarmast]

Hi all, a strange day happened and my friends started talking about trying to set a game up.

Problem is? We as a group do not know where to start. What books do we need to get for both player and DM to start, and any other tips? I am familiar with how the game is played due by learning the rules prior to play online, but I know nothing about the DMing part, nor would I proclaim to be a know it all

P.S: I already have a worry with one of them, as she argued with the one who thought about being the DM about how the elves are supposed to be like in the world. Don't want it to end up with her clashing with the DM over stuff she disagrees with.
She also claims to be a rule-stickler though, and if I recall? There is a rule out there that says the DM is the one with the final say or something like that. If any of you know where it is in the books, that might help to make her calm down. Might :redface:
1. Get the basic rules from the WoTC web site. That has all of the rules you need to begin.
2. If you can get your hands on the Starter Set, the adventure therein is a decent one .
3. If you go to WoTC's website, they have downloadable Pregenerated Character sheets. I'd suggest that you stick to the basic rules (the free ones) and only use the pregens for

Fighter, Rogue, Wizard, and Cleric.
(If you are all determined to roll up characters, I suggest the quick build for each class)
Have the players choose their characters from the pregens.
Play for a few sessions. You can switch out characters later if the group likes this well enough to invest in a copy of the PHB.

The DM is the authority is cited on Page 6 of the PHB.

As to your already bossy player:
Sounds like you all, as a group, need to elect her to be the DM.

FWIW: Elves are described in the Players Handbook (PHB) in some detail, and in a bit less detail in the basic rules. If you can check out the PHB at the library, or head to D&D Beyond and read up in the race section,

[Sigreid]

Personally, I'd download the free rules and find a free level 1 adventure online. Reason being, I'd want to know it was something I was actually interested in before tossing out the dollars.

For the person DMing, I'd suggest they use the free rules to create a little 4 person group of characters and run them through the adventure before bringing players in. This will give them a solid familiarity with the module and at least most of the rules they'll have to use in the module.

[Keravath]

You can get the free basic rules on line. SRD=System Reference Document. It contains a minimum of race/class choices but is enough basic material to get started.

If you want to buy something then the minimum is probably the Players Handbook + Monster Manual. You can use the SRD for basic magic items and a lot of the Dungeon Master's Guide is extra detail on world building and other elements that might be useful for a new DM getting into the game who is really keen but overall I don't think most of the DMG is useful for new DMs or beginners. The basic rules of play are in the Players Handbook.

Finally, I'd suggest Lost Mines of Phandelver or the Essentials Kit as decent starting points. Both of these come with abbreviated sets of the rules and decent adventures to take the characters to level 5-7. The adventures aren't perfect since I think both have encounters that can end up killing level 1 characters fairly easily and a new DM might not see those coming but overall either could be a reasonable entry point to the game.

[Hairfish]

Personally, I take a page from the PbtA game Fellowship: unless it's important to the game world, the players of the PCs of each race get to decide what their race is like. Within reason, of course.

If your "this is what I think elves are like" player is the only one playing an elf, let them run with it. If there are multiple elven PCs, their players will have to reach an agreement between themselves.

e: If they're trying to use "elvishness" to justify some actually relevant in-game advantage, the situation changes somewhat. Would need more info about that, if that's the case.

[Sigreid]

Addendum to my recommendation up above:

1. I'd suggest the agreement from the group that if they decide they want to continue after the trial adventure, the PHB at least will be gotten and people will be allowed to rebuild their characters, keeping their gains from the first adventure but being able to take what they learned about what they liked and didn't like about their character and use the more expanded rules to build their character. You just retcon the adventure and pretend the character always was what they have become.
2. I personally wouldn't recommend the first game be Adventure League or another unknown table. The reason is simply that whether you have fun or not depends mostly on the other people at the table. So I'd recommend keeping it to known quantities.