Spectral Minion [PEACH]

[kinem]

Minion, Spectral

Diminuitive Construct (Incorporeal)
Hit Dice: 1d10 (1 hp)
Initiative: +9
Speed: fly 30’
Armor Class: 32 (+4 size, +5 dex, +5 deflection, +4 mage armor, +4 shield), touch 24, flat footed 27
Base Attack / Grapple: +0 / --
Attack: Incorporeal touch +10 melee touch (1d6 + Weakness + Fear)
Space/Reach: 1 ft. / 0 ft.
Special Attacks / Actions: Str damage, fear
Special Qualities: Incorporeal, evasion, construct immunities, darkvision 60’, low-light vision, fragile, deflection, displacement, Spell Resistance 30, Energy Resistance, Turn Vulnerability, Mage Armor, Shield, Superior Resistance, Damage Reduction 15/-
Saves: Fort +6, Reflex +13, Will +6
Abilities: STR -, DEX 20, CON -, INT -, WIS 10, CHA 10
Skills: Hide +17
Feats: Weapon Focus (Incorporeal Touch)[B], Improved Initiative[B], Lightning Reflexes[B]
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary or Grist (2-5)
Challenge Rating: 9
Treasure: None
Alignment: Neutral
Advancement: None

These are magically created incorporeal constructs that appear as translucent skulls.

They follow only extremely simple instructions from the creator. Examples are: stay, attack, hide, guard (= attack anyone but me who comes here) or flee. All spectral minions that obey the same person will attempt to follow the order if they are close enough to hear it.

Weakness (Su): A living creature struck by its touch takes 1d6 Strength damage unless it succeeds on a Fort save (DC 15; includes a +5 racial bonus)

Fear (Su): A living creature struck by its touch becomes panicked for 10 rounds unless it succeeds on a Will save (DC 15; includes a +5 racial bonus). If cornered, a panicked creature begins cowering. If the Will save succeeds, the creature is shaken for 1 round.

Fragile (Ex): If it takes even 1 point of damage, it is destroyed.

Displacement (Su): It appears to be about 2 feet away from its true location. The creature benefits from a 50% miss chance as if it had total concealment. However, unlike actual total concealment, displacement does not prevent enemies from targeting the creature normally. True seeing reveals its true location.

Shield (Su): An invisible, diminuitive tower shield-sized mobile disk of force hovers in front of it, negates magic missile attacks directed at it, and provides a +4 shield bonus to AC. This bonus applies against incorporeal touch attacks, since it is a force effect.

Mage Armor (Su): An invisible but tangible field of force surrounds it, providing a +4 armor bonus to AC.

Deflection (Su): It has a +5 deflection bonus to AC.

Superior Resistance (Su): It has a +6 resistance bonus on saving throws.

Energy Resistance (Ex): It has Resistance 20 to Acid, Cold, Electricity, Fire, Sonic, and Force damage.

Turn Vulnerability (Ex): Although not undead, it can be Turned or Rebuked as if it were a 20 HD undead.

Construct: Immune to mind-influencing effects, poison, sleep, paralysis, stunning, disease, death effects, and necromantic effects. A construct is not subject to critical hits, subdual damage, ability damage, ability drain, or energy drain. It is immune to any effect that requires a Fortitude save (unless the effect also works on objects). A construct cannot be raised or resurrected. Constructs do not require air.

Construction:
Spectral Minions are produced through use of a Rod of Spectral Minions.

Rod of Spectral Minions:
This skull-topped rod is about 4 feet long. It can be used to produce 1 spectral minion per day as a full round action, to a maximum of 5 that can exist at once, though if they are destroyed it allows new ones to be produced to replace them. The constructs obey whoever used the rod to create them, and the rod need not be carried afterwards.
Strong conjuration; CL 15th; Craft Rod, Craft Construct, chill touch, fear, shield, mage armor, displacement, and shield of faith; Price 60,000 gp; Weight 10 lb.

[Debihuman]

I gather you haven't made many monsters before. You have an idea, but your execution needs a lot of work before it's actually worth anyone using this.

Why is this an incorporeal construct? How is it even getting to the prime material plane? It has no actual purpose other than to kill your party.

This is a very unbalanced 1 HD monster. All it takes is one ranged ghost-touch weapon and it's toast. At 9th level, someone will have a ghost-touch weapon and this won't even matter.

1 HD monsters shouldn't be more than CR 3 because it has major flaws that will not stop high level creatures from taking it out at a distance with one hit. And it has way too many special abilities. It is a total glass jawed monster.

Mage Armor is a spell. You cannot combine it as deflection. This is written wrong.

An incorporeal creature has no natural armor bonus but has a deflection bonus equal to its Charisma bonus (always at least +1, even if the creature’s Charisma score does not normally provide a bonus). With Charisma 10 it has no additional deflection bonus other than +1.

It isn't carrying a shield so it doesn't get a shield bonus either.

Weakness (Su): A living creature struck by its touch takes 1d6 points of Strength damage unless it succeeds on a Fort save (DC 15; includes a +5 racial bonus). It isn't alive so it shouldn't have a racial bonus as it does not have a RACE.

I'm seeing a lot of rookie errors here. Let me ask you this: What are you trying to accomplish with this creature? Do you want something that players will defeat that is super cool or just overpowered and annoying?

Debby

[kinem]

I gather you haven't made many monsters before.

You wound me, Debi. It was many years ago that you first commented on a monster of mine, and I have made numerous ones since; well-crafted ones I like to think. Still, I appreciate your review.


Why is this an incorporeal construct?

That's what I wanted to make. To restate the obvious, it was constructed artificially, and to make it a bit unusual for such, it's incorporeal.


How is it even getting to the prime material plane?

It can be found on any plane, so I don't know why you assumed it's on the material plane. But it's produced by use of the Rod, so where it appears depends on where the Rod is used. As a reminder, in case you are thinking of Ethereal creatures, incorporeal is not the same as that.


It has no actual purpose other than to kill your party.

Well, it's mindless and just does what it's commanded to do.


This is a very unbalanced 1 HD monster. All it takes is one ranged ghost-touch weapon and it's toast. At 9th level, someone will have a ghost-touch weapon and this won't even matter.

Perhaps, although that's not a given. I know it's an unusual monster, and the CR is hard to judge for those, which is why I asked for the comments. I just added DR 15/- since that should help keep it around a bit longer, but it also has high AC, hiding ability, and Displacement to help it get in an attack before being destroyed.


1 HD monsters shouldn't be more than CR 3 because it has major flaws that will not stop high level creatures from taking it out at a distance with one hit. And it has way too many special abilities. It is a total glass jawed monster.

It's a bit of an experiment but I don't agree with that opinion. Yes, it's glass-jawed, as is my entire "Minion" line of constructs - that's kind of the point: Exploring what can be done with 1-hp monsters.


Mage Armor is a spell. You cannot combine it as deflection. This is written wrong.

In this case it's a Su ability, which does the same thing as the spell, so I used the same name. It stacks with a deflection bonus, so I don't know what you mean.


An incorporeal creature has no natural armor bonus but has a deflection bonus equal to its Charisma bonus (always at least +1, even if the creature’s Charisma score does not normally provide a bonus). With Charisma 10 it has no additional deflection bonus other than +1.

Specific rules supersede general rules. In this case, it explicitly has a +5 deflection bonus.


It isn't carrying a shield so it doesn't get a shield bonus either.

It has a Su ability which gives it a shield bonus much like the Shield spell.


Weakness (Su): A living creature struck by its touch takes 1d6 points of Strength damage unless it succeeds on a Fort save (DC 15; includes a +5 racial bonus). It isn't alive so it shouldn't have a racial bonus as it does not have a RACE.

Being alive has nothing to do with it. Any type of creature can have a Racial bonus, which is just a bonus specific to that kind of creature.


I'm seeing a lot of rookie errors here.

You might want to re-evaluate that statement. I'm no rookie, and while the balance might be questionable, the build is 100% correct in terms of the rules. It's an unusual monster because I already have made a ton of typical monsters.


Let me ask you this: What are you trying to accomplish with this creature?

While exploring what can be done with the 1-hp "minion" concept, to create a memorable addition to an encounter with the owner of the Rod.

[Debihuman]

Low HD monsters with Uber abilities are the WORST of monster design in my opinion. They are unbalanced.

1d10 hit dice but 1 hit point and it goes downhill from there. HP should be 5 and that's a pretty rookie mistake for monster creating.

I apologize for being harsh.

Debby

[kinem]

Low HD monsters with Uber abilities are the WORST of monster design in my opinion. They are unbalanced.

I can understand that opinion. What I would say, though, is that they are difficult - but possible - to design well. Also, they have to be used with caution, and should not be approached with a simplistic "CR tells the DM all he needs to know" view that a rookie DM might have.


1d10 hit dice but 1 hit point and it goes downhill from there. HP should be 5 and that's a pretty rookie mistake for monster creating.

If that were an oversight on my part, then indeed, it would have been a mistake. But it's not an oversight. They specifically have the Fragile special quality that makes them have 1 hp. Not all monsters have average hp. For example, Bloodhulks (MM4) always have maximum hp per HD. That's a perfectly legitimate option in monster design, just not the default one.


I apologize for being harsh.

I don't want to discourage you from giving people feedback on monsters. Perhaps though you should make a point to put in some positive comments as well as critiques. Also, since none of the errors you thought you found here were actual errors, perhaps take a more open-minded approach when dealing with unusual monster abilities.