[3.5] How would you make a sword-swallower?

[BrianStromm]

I was working on a bard build with hidden weapons and I asked myself the question: "where on his body would a bard hide his blade?"

Hence the question I posed in the title. How would you make a sword-swallower in D&D 3.5?

The character doesn't have literally swallow blades, he just has to be able to start every encounter by making a weapon appear from his body.

[satorian]

A couple levels of Psychic Warrior, and a slight of hand roll to make it look like it's appearing from your mouth?

[BrianStromm]

You are referring to the Call Weaponry power right? If there are no rules about actually swallowing weapons that may be the best bet, but then I just need to find a way to make it more performative somehow.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Magically enhance your mouth as an extradimensional space (specifically, a handy haversack). Move action to pull out anything you've "swallowed." Like your sword.

[Seerow]

Magically enhance your mouth as an extradimensional space (specifically, a handy haversack). Move action to pull out anything you've "swallowed." Like your sword.

There's a spell for that. Hoard Gullet. 1st level spell, lasts hours per level.

[Troacctid]

Absorb weapon would be great for this. You'd have to UMD it, since it's not a bard spell, but otherwise it sounds exactly like what you're looking for.

[BrianStromm]

I don't think Hoard Gullet works well because it says that to get an item from your stomach would be a full-round action. That is too slow for my purposes.

Absorb Weapon does sound great though. Get an eternal wand (or regular wand and high UMD), stick that in a wand chamber in the weapon and pretend to draw the weapon from your stomach while touching the blotch with your tongue/nose.

[loky1109]

Body Pouch feat maybe?

[Doctor Despair]

Nomad Psions can take an ACF that grants them extradimensional storage space in their body. At level 1, it's the size of a belt pouch; maybe a shuriken or a dagger. At 5th level, it's as large as a sack -- probably enough for a shortsword, I'd think.

[MaxiDuRaritry]

Bite attacks are attacks made with teeth and fangs (for a lot of creatures, anyway), and I imagine you could easily fashion a fang into a weapon. So how about a +1 sizing/morphing weapon? Store it in your jaw as a tooth, and pull it out when you need it, I guess? It's a possible option, anyway.

[Inevitability]

Shadow Cache is on the bard list, unlike Hoard Gullet, and has a very similar effect. It gives you access to an extradimensional space via an invisible portal, so just position it near your mouth and the illusion should be convincing enough. The only downside is the 10% chance that your items disappear for each day you keep them there.

If going this route, I would consider going Planar Bard 6 to grab Portal Dissonance, which lets you redirect the Shadow Cache portal to lead to any portal you've entered in the past month. In a plane hopping campaign, it can prove to be a surprisingly versatile trick, especially because it bypasses the item loss chance.

[Vizzerdrix]

Hoard gullet spell. Max ranks in sleight of hand and preform. Finally a bit of DR for safety.

[Troacctid]

You could use Spell Thematics to change the visuals of your favorite weapon-generating spell and make it look like that thunderlance is pulled out of your mouth.

[Vizzerdrix]

You could use Spell Thematics to change the visuals of your favorite weapon-generating spell and make it look like that thunderlance is pulled out of your mouth.

Oooh! This, but with that spell that looks like a sword made of teeth!

[BrianStromm]

Thanks everyone for the suggestions. There were quite a few options I never heard of :smallsmile:

[Gimli177]

Hear me out, this might be a bit more ratchet of a way to do it but if you are looking for a non-magical way to do it (like maybe you want to play a rogue who is a circus con man or something or if you just dont want to use up a spell) you get your hands on a bag of holding. This also removes a lot of restrictions as to the type of objects swallowing. Pay a cleric to surgically stitch it into your esophagus. Take the quick draw feat so that drawing a weapon is a free action. Dropping a weapon is a free action in 3.5. Make sure you have a back up weapon for all the members of your party. Say you all get your weapons confiscated or have to sneak in somewhere that searches you for weapons. In a single turn you can quick draw all the weapons and drop them for free in adjacent squares allowing you to arm your whole party. Or just intimidate a kobald by pulling 30 shortswords out of your mouth in 6 seconds. Or if your DM allows for a lot of cheese you can make a wall of a ton of dropped shields in front of you all as a free action.

[blackwindbears]

Isn't that a Prestige Class in that Gwendolyn Kestrel book?

[Nihilarian]

If I was making a sword swallower I'd probably make them an Exemplar