Strange dungeon

[Alhallor]

OOC (https://forums.giantitp.com/showthread.php?666432-Strange-Dungeon-OOC)

You all awake definitely not where you layd you're head down. You're in a dusty old room, in cages. One cage holds a big water tank with another inmate inside, in another one is a box with a... Cat?

Most normal cells have a bed and something to eat and drink at the side, at the top of the open water tank is a dish with gruel and besides the box with the cat is a plate with some dead mouses.

It was a pretty good carnage the other day, you brought down an entire guardhouse, but you were stuck in the rubble afterwards. As soon as you got that out of the way, some guards managed to apprehend you. They gave you a pretty mean beating and the only thing you remember is someone saying... "I know just the place for this one." You wake up in a water tank, which is nicer than you get most of the time, but you are still in a cell, which is pretty much what you expected.

You're order has received word of some weird disappearances, and you have been sent to investigate. You have already asked some villagers and they definitely could tell you that people were missing. You thought you found some tracks, the last thing you remember is the smell of lavender when you lost consciousness on you're horse, who is currently missing.

You have made a great fire to search the smoke for the future, you have been succesful. You have seen a great wyrm in a deep hole in you're vision. There was a lot of color and people who carried fire in they're hands. The vision was so intense however that you lost conscience and you awake in a cell.

As instructed you followed the instructions of you're buddy and hey it seems that people are missing! Seems like a shining knight even was at the same village as you! It wasn't that hard to find the trails even for you, but then you smelt lavender... And the next thing you know is that you wake up in a cell.

You wanted to give the challenge of the cat god a try and you woke up here! That wasn't all however. You faintly remember that the cat lord himself spoke to you. Some of you're brothers and sisters are kept in here, of course you have to find out everything about this big box, but if you could keep you're brethren save, the favor of the cat lord will be surely yours.

The adventurers guild wasn't really happy with you're recent claims... But not only where they're willing to let you keep you're claims but also compensate you for a Class B mission! Of course you need to get through the dungeon and map it out and the "we could bring you in, but not bring you out... But if you are a true adventurer you will surely have a good chance." Could have concerned you. But what chances did you had, really? Now you are in a cell.

You don't have you're equipment, familiars or cohorts at you're side. If you normally have a boot dagger or something small in you're normal clothing you still have that.

Strange beginnings (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit#gid=0)

[Cygnia]

Two little grey ears jutted out of the box like little furry shark fins.

...well, dis sux...

The box itself wasn't the problem. The fact that it was in a cage was the problem. The immediate problem at least. Another immediate problem was that Her Stuff was gone. Her artificial Pointy Ends with the Shiny Rocks and the belt that turned into a collar and the tacky but admittedly Useful vest. Her carrying pouch with Her Comfy Bed and Magic Sticks...

..and Her Everlasting FOOD!

Her ears flicked with annoyance.

Her thoughts turned towards what the Cat Lord had said about Her siblings being here. That meant Her Big Grumpy Sister Smokey (https://imgur.com/a/XvXkgOe) and Her Well-Meaning Older Brother Pippin (https://imgur.com/a/daR9qB9) (who loved everybody even when he shouldn't) -- and Her litter mate Dashie. Who was a Doofus (https://www.instagram.com/p/C0y9Wwug6bP/).

Guess I gotta go Save Everybuddy...

Mystery pawed carefully to see if She could squeeze Herself through the bars.

[BelGareth]

Infernox wakes up with a pounding headache, holding it while wincing in pain, eyes squinting he looked around seeing his location. "Well, that...was...ok, whats this?", standing up sighs and then activtes his anklets to teleport out of the cage....but nothing happened...what? he looked down, and saw he was in his underclothes, all his equipment was missing.

Well darn. he thought to himself

Now, how would he....ok, his claws were still good, and the other voice in his head perked up to the thoughts of destroying the cage he was in. He looked around to inspect the cage.


What is the cage made out of and how?

[Benoojian]

Finding herself in a cage, Gina looks around to see if anyone is watching the prisoners. If no one is around she begins dissolving the lock or the weakest part of the cage. The Dungeon Delver Extraordinaire doesn’t do well in confined spaces and she wants out.

Shattering Word reserve feat x2, 12 damage that ignores hardness per round

[Aegis013]

Xyrona sits up suddenly and pats herself down, immediately realizing that her horse and equipment are missing. She looks around and takes in the environment quietly.

"Anybody remember how we got here? I vaguely recall the smell of lavender and then I was here."

[Ridai]

Faith does a big stretch and yawn before getting up, then another biiig stretch just for good measure. She picks up the jar of water and has a quick look around at the current situation. "Convenient kidnapping, sweet," she says as she points a finger at the jar, making the contents glow golden for a moment. Between the chill voice, the half-smile, and the messy blonde hair, she's clearly not all the way awake yet. But she has breakfast, so that is about to get fixed. Where there was water before, there is now sweet, sweet golden nectar, and Faith is having a biiig sip. That one always wakes her up! Whipping a hand through her hair appears to be enough to fix her coif right up.

"Alriiight. Heya people, I'm Faith St. Mary, I explore dungeons. If ya want me to soup up yer breakfast, pass me yer water, I'll fix ya right up while I wait to interview the staff," she says, chill big smile to everyone else present. Another sip, her free hand grasping the air, which causes a saxophone to appear in her grasp, which she promptly kicks back on the bed with.

"Don't mind me," Faith says, and proceeds to add smooth background jazz to the scene. With her belongings having been taken except for her undies, the sound of chill tooting ought to get someone nearby to check. And if not, well, that just means she'll let herself out one way or another.

Angelic Acumen and Tongue of the Celestials is reapplied. Faith makes herself breakfast by using Golden Goblet of Rise-Mokér on the water, and summons an angelic instrument truly ahead of its time via Horn of Heaven.

[Metastachydium]

Floating in the tank, Brakq wakes with a bubbling groan. It's simple. Things are simple. She's locked up. Stupid thing, getting locked up. And people talk. Stupiud thing, to talk all the time. But then, she's in a fish tank. With no fish. Let 'em do 'em. Not like she hears all the talking. And there's no guards. She can see. (And <REDACTED> any guard she can't.) That means one thing.

She's not locked in here with this stuff. This stuff is locked in here with her. She reaches up. Grabs the plate with that gooey stuff. Pulls it into the tank. Lets the gooey thing muddy up the water. And mouthing something hard to discern but evidently very loud… Strike.


ATTACK THE WATER TANK (with MOUNTAIN HAMMER, ignoring all hardness and whatnot; and an empty plate): [roll0] (-4 for non-proficiency with plates) for negligible base damage plus [roll1]

[Alhallor]

The metal bars of the cells seem to be pretty sturdy, some have claw marks and minor specks of rust, but nonetheless they seem to be in a pretty good condition and always that close together that it's actually kinda hard to get through just by squeezing.

With cats basically don't have shoulders with an Escape Artist check against 20 Mystery could squeeze through.

Gina begins working on the integrity of the cage which seems to be slowly working and erodes the iron bars. But it will take some time, till it's destroyed enough.

The smooth jazz music doesn't seem to alert any guards or anything immediately.

There is also a sign in the middle of the room, the words on it are annoyingly tiny, probably only readable when you're stand directly before it.

The water tank in one of the cells begins to start to have a lot of cracks. After a little bit it breaks and releases a mass of water and a merfolk.

[Cygnia]

Mystery made a noise that suspiciously sounded like "...harumph...". Foolish hoomins, thinking that they could keep a CAT locked up! Mere bars would not stop Her unlike Dashie who is a Doofus and a Chonkabutt.

First things first though. She flopped back into the box on Her back and made air biscuits. Rhythmic purring emanated from Her plush throat. It was absolutely adorable if anyone could see it.

It was, however, absolutely necessary for Her survival in this place. To keep Her safe from the elements -- and purrtect Her from Her OWN AWESOME POWERS~!

Then She hopped out and attempted to squeeze through the bars...


Invoking Endure Exposure on Herself.
[roll0] Escape Artist attempt

[Ridai]

Oh, no one coming, alright then. Since the room is getting flooded, Faith crosses her legs on the bed while playing. A toe is aimed at the bars, which are getting blasted not only with smooth jazz, but also holy energies.

Faith uses her Celestial Light to attack the bars of her cage with 3d6 divine damage per usage.

[BelGareth]

Infernox responds "Faith St. Mary, well met....or well...whatever...not well, I am Infernox"

He looks around and sees others trying to break out and sighs. Hopefully he could burn his way out. He looked around and decided that wouldn't work, and instead decided to listen to the inner voice of 'destroying' the objects around him.

Whatever, maybe it would work.


2 claw attacks against bars for double damage with Ruinous Attack from Aym being bound.
[roll0]
[roll1]

[roll2]
[roll3]

Per the SRD, Iron bars have hardness 10 and 90hp's
EDIT: at ~15 damage per round, thats 6 rounds

[Metastachydium]

The aforesaid Merfolk flops onto her face rather ungracefully, the face in question mere inches away from being full of glass. This doesn't seem tpo disturb her much. Almost instantly, she's up on her elbows, looking around rather frantically. I want my hammer. I want it! she says, at last, in lieu of an introduction and promptly grabs a shard of glass lying within the reach of those funny, long Merfolk arms. And then she shouts. MOUNTAIN HAMMER!! as though that was a normal thing to say. And she stabs the lock.


Punishing Mountain Hammer with yet another improvised weapon: [roll0] for negligible plus 4 and [roll1], ignoring hardness;
do tell if grabbing a shard of glass results in damage to her

[Alhallor]

Be it by a random shard of glass, residual spell energy used in an unforeseen way, claws or a saxophone, the iron bars give way.

[roll0] damage by grabing a glass shard and using it as an improvised weapon, once. The shard of glass is ruined.

The cat seems to want to get out too, with a bit of help the cat gets out.

I'm gonna assume here that everyone gets out somehow, because you're clearly able to.

Even with some sound made it doesn't seem that there are any guards yet.

The two doors that led out of the prison room have some plaques on it, namely "Horse experiments" and "Guard room"

Wet floor (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Cygnia]

Smug Kitteh was Smug.

OK, time to get out of Teh Wet nao...

Mystery padded towards the edge of the room -- away from Teh Wet and finally deigned to look at the other prisoners.

There was a short hoomin. A hoomin with slightly pointy ears. A loud hoomin. A louder AND wetter hoomin. And a warm hoomin. Suitable minions for now. At least until Mystery could get Her Stuff back. She shook Her paws frantically to try to free Herself from the accursed Wet.

...suppose I'm gonna haf to give dese guyz My Blessing...

Mystery yawned instead. Better to see if dese guyz even were worthy of Her Blessing first.

[Metastachydium]

Shaking some blood off of her cut hand (Brakq has time to bleed!), the Merfolk begins to noisily flop and crawl out of confinement (or whatever remains of that). Stupid place; she'll have to rough it up a bit more. Then it won't be so stupid. But some of the folks here know the drill, that's good, some talent. Talent's good. And still no guards. Stupid guards, they make everything worse.

She looks around once more. Big, bulging eyes settle on Infernox for now. Others know their way around. This one looks fun too, though. Fire's fun. She'd use it, fire. But the ocean's a wet place. Stupid wet bits of the world. You wanna, uh, wanna set that thing on fire? she motions towards the sign. I just want my hammer. Makes me ALL, uh, antsy, doing without. she waves a hand before her face, spraying more blood onto everything. Blood's fun too. But you can have it, uh, I'll find something. she nods encouragingly.

[Benoojian]

"I'm Gina by the way, I don't suppose anyone else is here as punishment for fraud? And I swear to the Gods, if this sign says 'I prepared Explosive Runes'..." Gina leans in close to read the tiny letters on the sign.

[Ridai]

Faith smiles and waves hi to Infernox as she plays.

The bars are open, and the song reaches its end, the saxophone conveniently disappearing. Stepping into the wet and now jazzless prison, Faith saunters over to Brakq, giving her a shiny, nice-feeling slap on the bicep. "Hey, you do you, buddy, jus' lemme have a lil' looksee at that sign, then it's all yers." The bloody hand seems to have decided to stop bleeding.

Afterwards, she's right there with Gina looking at the sign. "Jus' ol' regular kidnappin' for me. Lavender smell and out like a light. Saved me a buncha time, really. But ooh, haven't had an explosive runes trap yet, always heard about it. Last dungeon, outfitter said those're fallin' outta fashion, too many people expecting 'em, like with the 11 Foot Pole Revolution. Sounded real heartbroken 'bout that, poor guy."

The healing is using Healing Light + Hands of the Healer. Taps for 3d6 healing.

[Alhallor]

Please retreat to you're cells and stay there.
The administrators

It has no additional effects.

[Ridai]

"Ah well." Faith strolls over to her cell, gets the pitcher of water, walks to the guard room door, crisply knocks on it twice, and, if possible, lets herself in.

"Hiii, name's Faith St. Mary, I got here jus' a bit ago. Ya see, I'm tourin' dungeons and would love ta have a chat with y'all 'bout yer workplace an' jobs. You free at the moment? I've brought drinks." Faith says with her thoroughly relaxed voice, either upon entering the room (shaking the pitcher in her hand), or in front of the door.

Diplomacy [roll0]

[Cygnia]

Mystery ambled over to the musical hoomin and waited to scoot in after Faith if/when the door opened. The guards might have Her Stuff and it was best to lay claim to it before dese guyz Got Thoughts in their little hoomin brains.

[BelGareth]

As the others escape, it's none to soon that Infernox also leaves their cell.

And is immediately accosted to light something on fire.

Of course, he would be that person. And from the merfolk... or whatever the nines that thing is

"Maybe we should choose a door, Horse experiment seems like something I don't want to mess with"

[Aegis013]

Xyrona's face seems mildly concerned that someone else was admittedly in here for fraud, but shakes it off. "Can I get some assistance? I don't actually have a way out this cage."

Once released, Xyrona nods to the others "I am in your debt."

She then investigates the "horse experiment" with some trepidation. "What did they do to my horse?" she asks rhetorically, turning on her heel from the sign and marching with determination in the direction indicated.

"If they hurt Asfaloth, they'll answer to me!"

[Alhallor]

If I have understood anything wrong, please tell me here or in the ooc.

It's also your turn.

When Faith opens the door one guard slaps the other on the back. "Told you they'd break out, you owe me 5 gold."

A rather ginormous guard strikes his club on the ground, which makes them sparkle with electricity. "Seize them down! Don't listen to them talk, remember we lost site 0309 to a fallen researcher!

The two guards at the front do the same, while another seems to mumble to himself.

"I would really like something to drink."

They are several chests on the southern wall, all have a plaque above them with titles such as: "Burning guy." "Water-Human" and "Kitten toys".

Xyrona, worried about her horse opens the door towards an experimental chamber.

You step into a nice and green meadow. It almost feels like the sun warms you're skin, but it's just arcana light sources. Asfaloth comes towards you, happy to see you, you also see another horse that seems to have the head of a squid. You hear a voice inside you're head when you open the door.

"And this is my most favorite succulant dandelion I like to nibble on it occasionally but not too much or it would disappear outright! Oh, hello there, are you acquainted with that fine steed?

OOC: Asfaloth can fit through 1 square doors, just needs to be slow and not charging.

Doors opened. (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Cygnia]

MY STUFF~!

Problem one: Violent hoomins between Mystery and Her Stuff. Which wouldn't actually BE a problem, except for...

Problem two: ...musical hoomin also in between Mystery and Her Stuff. And musical hoomin made for the purrfect meat shield. But, she needed that Special Something in order for Mystery to be truly effective.

*sigh* Supposed I haz to give dis one My Blessing den...

Faith suddenly felt two soft paws (with only the BAREST pinpricks of claws -- honest!) stretched out behind her calves. And...was that faint purring?


Invoking Endure Exposure on Faith.

[Metastachydium]

Between being specifically asked to break something she normally shouldn't (and getting to Hammer Blast away at the disgustingly polite woman's door with appropriate gusto) and hearing a clear implication that her toy of preference is likely nearby, Brakq forgets about the sign and Infrnox wondrously fast. They've my hammer? she turns around in a clumsy display of flopping about in the big puddle she made. You've my hammer! I want my hammer. she states, crawling on and on towards the door (how's it so far away?!). It's a really straightforward setup. She likes straightforward!

[Ridai]

Confronted with guards and one very loud one, Faith goes "Hey, tha's alright, if ya- wait, hol' on a moment, feeling beans." She bends down to pick up the kitty cat wanting attention, providing some scritches behind the ears to boot. "I don' need ta do the talkin', y'all can just talk 'bout whatever ya want, but jus' sayin', that 0309 sounds interesting, wha' happened there? Also hey, can you please hand her her hammer?"

Faith looks to Brakq. "Hey, do you need' a hand? I can go get yer hammer for you, if ya want." Brakq looks like she's having a bad time, so hey, golden rule.

[BelGareth]

Infernox frowns.

They have our stuff he thought.

He took a step forward.

You have our stuff.

[Metastachydium]

A hand? I, uh, I've hands. Two of them. Brakq informs Faith, somewhat baffled and quite absently. You should know. You fixed one! she reminds the prodigious talker who's… Only got her underwear on, for some reason? Why are these people shambling about in their underwear, Brakq wonders, all of a sudden. That's so stupid. Why's everyone's in, uh, in this weird state of undress? she asks it aloud, just as suddenly, as she finally reaches that stupid door to the stupid other room. And where's my hammer? I want it. I want to hit things!

[Aegis013]

Xyrona throws her arms around her trusted mount's neck. "Asfaloth! They didn't hurt you, did they?" upon seeing the squid-head horse, Xyrona blinks a few times.

"I am... May I ask, what are you? What interest do you have in my horse?"

[Benoojian]

Gina summons a swarm of bees around the ginormous guard and one of the others, “Stay still while we get our things back and the bees won’t hurt you.”
Gina begins moving towards the box clearly labeled for her.

[Cygnia]

HEY!!! PUT ME DOWN!!! Ooooh, wait, ooh, dat's nice...OK, hoomin, I let you live a little bit longer... Mystery purred in satisfaction, deigning to accept Faith's administrations. Besides, at this height, She had a purrfect line of sight to blast these insolence guards with HER SHEER AWESOME POWER~!!!!

...providing Her hoomin took a few more steps forward. Fire was too dangerous and might damage Her Stuff, but She had another tool in Her Arsenal.

[Alhallor]

"I'll get the traitor, you take down the talker!"

The giant guard doesn't even move, just extends his massive hands to clobber the other guard, who falls down with one hit, the smell of ozone fills the air.

The two other guards rush at Faith, brandishing they're clubs, but one does get stung heavily by a swarm of bees.

Roll the bees damage.


Attack 1: [roll0]
Damage 1: [roll1] and [roll2] DC 13 Fort save for half, all damage is subdual.

Attack 2: [roll3]
Damage 2: [roll4] and [roll5] DC 13 Fort save for half, all damage is subdual.

-------------------Xyrona------------------

Asfaloth doesn't seem hurt at all, though perhaps a did agitated because of the other weird horse and the time it was separated from you. The other horse answers by filling your head with perfectly understandable words.

Oh, I didn't wanted to be dispespectful good sir, I was just showing Asfaloth the sights, as would any good crop-partner, really. I didn't had any untoward thoughts or ambitions, no sir.

First battle! (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Cygnia]

Ah, purrfect...Teh Stoopids come closer to Me. Ideally, the Big Stoopid with the Electric Thwomper would have been nice to get into range as well, but Mystery could make do with this. Mystery's mouth opened into what appeared to be a biiiiiiiiiiiiig

*!!!YAWN!!!*

And a cloud of a strange gas enveloped the two lesser thugs, who suddenly found themselves weakened! Surprisingly enough, Faith seemed unaffected.


DragonKitteh Breath Weapon (DC 19 Fort for half duration for weaken, -6 Str penalty for 4 rounds, 2 rounds if Fort save is successful. 15ft cloud)
[roll0] Initiative if/when needed

[Metastachydium]

As one of the guards punches out another, Brakq seems to be overcome with an uncontrollable fit of juvenile giggling. But then, it occurs to her. There's people hittiong each other in the next room. She could be hitting things in the next room. Is that, uh, that is a fist fight, I want to fist fight now. she declares, crawling past the doorframe and the ridiculous little ball of fur, only to spring up and flop against the side of the closest guard with great force and a greater shout of DESTRUCTION HAMMER PUNCH!!


Yes, she is going to scream all her attacks, which, in this case is an unarmed strike Mountain Hammer against the guard on Q14: [roll0] for [roll1] and [roll2] NONLETHAL bludgeoning;
if the attack deals damage, she immediate action burns a use of Destruction Devotion to lessen the armpour or natural bonus armour of the guard by 1.

[Benoojian]

"I did try to warn you..."

[roll0]

[Aegis013]

Xyrona, somewhat uneasy around the strange entity, mounts her horse without further conversation and guides it carefully through the passage towards the guard room. As she is unarmed, she stays behind the others electing to observe the combat for now.

[Ridai]

The offer fell on deaf ears, it appears, as Faith gets resoundingly bonked on the head by a club, only barely getting missed by the second as she reels back on accident. Not that the bonk leaves all that much in lasting injury. At the same time, lil' cat has a burpee.

"Chill out, yer givin' the kitty gas," Faith says, waving a hand in front of her face, transitioning into a horn (in the musical instrument sense) materializing in said hand. "More the combat banter types? Alrighty then." And a mighty toot is tooted, with a little musical flourish. Celestial sound pleases the ear, but also has a soundwave rush forward to bowl angry guards over, further billowing the feline burp. A little step out of the way of the door follows to make room a bit.

Full Use Horn of Heaven, creating a 20ft cone doing [roll0] sonic damage (Fort DC 15 halves). Targets the guards in P15 and M15. Five foot step to R14.

[Alhallor]

Mystery's mighty yawn let's both guards be heavily burdened, they're gear suddenly way too heavy for them. The bees do they're stinging work, damaging one guard and with Faith's horn, and some stings, the heavenly music makes him unconscious.

The other guard, battered and weak, still try's to strike at Faith weakly, but Brakq is faster and strikes him down with one hearty punch.

The big guard sighes. "Why do I have to do everything myself?!"

He lurches forward, ignoring the hurtful sting of the bees.

[roll0]

Without further discussion he swings towards Brakq, trying to get him down.

[roll1]
Damage [roll2] and DC 13 Fortitude save for half [roll3] Electricity damage, all damage is subdual.

Guards are falling down. (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Benoojian]

"If you have to do everything yourself then I suppose we'd better focus fire on you so we can get our Damned stuff back" Drawing on the magic between magic, Gina lets out an arcane swear, attempting to blind the large guard and also blasting him as the word burrows into his eyes. Then she draws a shadowy curtain across her face and disappears.

Standard, Reserve Fuse: Shadow Veil and Shattering Word, DC 18 Will save from the large guard or he treats everything as concealed (20% miss chance and -5 to spot) and 6 sonic damage(damage regardless of save)
Swift, Vanishing Act, Gina is invisible 1 round

[Ridai]

"Woah, magic swearing, nice." Faith observes Gina's handiwork with a chill smile, taking mental notes.

Switching the kitty cat over to her right arm (transfer scritches included), Faith reaches out to the less big guard in front of her, putting a glowing hand on his shoulder. "Hey. Take a break. You deserve it." The energy flowing into the guard does feel like nap time might be just the thing right now.

Standard Celestial Light vs the smaller guard. The damage inflicted is good-aligned divine energy that does no damage to good targets, half to neutral, and full to evil.
Melee touch attack [roll0], [roll1] damage

[Cygnia]

WHOOP! Careful dere, hoomin -- DON'T DROP ME~! A slight mewl of indignation escaped the kitteh's throat as Faith shifted her hold. But the further skritchings helped placate Her.

Mystery thought about unleashing Her POWERFUL COMMAND OF THE ELEMENTS~! against Teh Big Stoopid with the Electric Thwomper, but that might also destroy the stingy thingies currently harrying him. Yes, clearly this was a Strategic Idea to wait for Her Weakening Breath to rechargeandnotjustHerbeinglazyandenjoyingtheheadsk ritches.

Lazy Kitteh is Lazy this round ;)

[Metastachydium]

A wide slasher bludgeoner smile materializes on Brakq's visage as the little guard falls, and the big guard battering away at her does little to wipe it off. Quite on the contrary. You give 'em, you get 'em. Cost of doing business. Life is dumb, and dumb is boring. Danger's fun. Almost as much as breaking stuff is. You, uh, you hit me. Brakq informs the guard with an odd kind of glee, before turning towards the other shmucks in here with her. He hit me! I need to, uh, I need to hit him now; save some of him for me, uh, me hitting him. she instructs them focusing all her otherwise available attention on trying to pry the funny stick out of the downed little guard's hand. It's a bludgeon! That lightning-strikes people! This must be her hatching-day.


Fortitude: [roll0];
Brakq move action tries to Rm herself, heedless of any AoOs that might provoke.

[Alhallor]

Brakq doesn't need to concern himself with getting damaged, because the combined efforts of Faith, Gina and probably a sizable morale boost from the kitty the heavy guard falls down too.

A heavy silence falls down on the room, only interrupted by the clacking of Asfaloth hoofs.

They have your equipment inside and are unlocked.

The guards all wear Studded Leather armor, the one from the big one is masterwork but also pretty big. They all have masterwork clubs that 2 times per day, can deal 3d6 Lightning damage (Fort DC 13 for half). You can freely decide to deal subdual damage with this clubs without getting a penalty.

Together they also have [roll0] Silver coins.
[roll1] Gold coins.
A Mug with 5 dice.
A bottle filled with mint liqour.
And an unsent letter to a wife (Gerlinde)


Hi Gerlinde,

how are you? I'm fine.

I don't know how the weather is, being underground and all, I'm sure you can have a bit more weather with you serving in the temple of 'Our Pain Devouring Lady That Brings Utter Suffering?'

It's just that great being a guard and being evil, normally when you're a henchman you just get downed by some goody-two-shoes paladin, like in my last appointment, I really thought that Wraith-Priest would take better care of us.

But it doesn't matter I can annoy my coworkers and call it discipline, we got a kitty in our last shipment and I'm being sure to kick it later, I can just call it testing!

Hope you had a nice sacrifice weekend.

In backstabbing love,
Gunther.

Money will probably play a role later.

Tip, Tip, Tap. (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Aegis013]

Xyrona happily collects her equipment, re-saddling her horse and glad to no longer need to ride bareback. As she works she informs the others of what she encountered in the other chamber. She also spends time carefully securing her and Asfaloth's armor.

"I'm glad that this group is so capable. Though, have any of you ever seen a tentacle-faced horse that speaks thoughts directly into your mind? There's one of those in that room labeled "horse experiment". It was rather uncanny. It didn't seem to be hostile, but given we're in this strange place, I certainly wouldn't mind a second opinion."

[Ridai]

"Ohhh, this an Evil dungeon, alrighy." And down the guards go. Okay, first things first!


Getting the lady her hammer from the big guard! "Here you go!"
Returning the toys to the kitten! Faith opens the chest and carefully places the kitten inside (with an extra few scritches under the chin). "Have fun, I'll be right back!"
Faith getting her own stuff! Walking over aaall the way to the last chest, she opens it and finds her Shenanigans Tools which are also her sustenance and mobility. And clothes!
Searching the guards and reading the letter. "Ohh, it's C-Evil, even! Hey, doin' what they love, at least. Really shoulda guessed by the moustaches, hm."
Putting on one of the studded leather armors and taking a guard club, on account of having nothing else in terms of equipment.
Lifting the kitty back out the box if necessary.


Clapping, then rubbing her hands, causing them to glow, Faith tops up everyone who got hurt (including herself). "Tentacle horse? I'mma check it out. Gonna explore the whole thing, might 's well start with someone who wanna talk. How 'bout you folks?"

Heal everyone with Healing Light, put on one of the normal studded leather armors, and take one of the guard clubs. Then go meet the tentacle horse after interviewing people.

[Cygnia]

Good. Teh hoomin set Her down without having to give the order. Though, while Faith's back was turned, She immediately hopped back out of the chest and ambled over to read this evil guard's letter...

...

...

...

...Mystery's tail twitched in anger. And expressed Her fury as only a kitteh could right on the unconscious man's head. Besides, best to get dis outta teh way now before I gotta *sigh* shift into teh Ugly form. Without a backward glance. Mystery padded back to the chest with Her stuff, with the telltale scent of cat urine now emanating from the prone guard.

Then the cat began to grow and her form began to change into something more hoominoid. Female, possibly a gnome or a halfling, but even smaller than one of those two species. (https://imgur.com/SPkPQJG) And nekkid. But there were Her clothes in that chest. Tacky vest, check. Belt to improve Her Awesome Powers? Check. Artificial pointy endz with their pretty baubles? Check and check. Carrying pack for all Her stuff -- ooh and Her everlasting FOOD was in dere too -- check.

And the wands. Yep, zappy time now. Check.

Reluctantly hoominoid now, the former cat turned towards the others. "'Sup?"

[Metastachydium]

Only ever so slightly displeased that she couldn't get a piece of the big guard (in the end, it's not like fleshy things make crunchy noises that satisfying when hit with a blunt implement; Brakq just feels there must be better stuff to hit with a stick in here!), Brakq accepts her treasuredhammer from the weird song-dance lady with the closest thing to a genuine gratitude her face can show and… Oddly enough, doesn't bother to take a good swing yet, no. Instead, using the blocky, big maul as a grotesque crutch, she flops and drags herself all the way to the her chest and looks in. The gauntlests, armour and assorted tidbits are put on without much ado; but the backpack gets some extra attention. She removes, one after the other, sveral pyramid-shaped flasks of clear liquid and two large earthenware eggs with curious little metallic pins sticking out of them, inspects them with an idiotic grin, then places them back in, swinging the whole thing onto her back. There's alightshow for later in there. So good!

It is only then that she equips the big hammer again… And swiftly turns it against the chest with a resounding MOPUNTAIN HAMMER!! It feels so right. I, uh, I have my stuff now. she tells the cat, evidently unfazed by her sudden transformation into a not-cat. Let's go break something.


Mountain Hammer on the empty chest, because of course: [roll0] for [roll1] and [roll2], ignoring all hardness.

[Aegis013]

Xyrona covers her face upon the realization that Mystery's shifted form is not wearing any garments, the tips of her pointed ears turning red.

"Please cover up. It's immodest." She says, half-mumbling through her hands which are blocking her view.

[Cygnia]

In response, Mystery just shot a baleful look towards Xyrona. If it wasn't for the fact that She no longer had Her magnificent plush fur in this form, Mystery would have chosen to stay nekkid. No acute sense of scent, no silently communicative tail and ears, no fur to stay warm...if it wasn't for Teh Thumbz, hoomin form would be utterly useless. How do hoomins even LIVE like dis?!

"...whatebber..." muttered Mystery. Eventually, garments were finally worn. At least the louder, wetter hoomin didn't seem to care. So, Breaker-of-Stuff was also now deemed worthy of Mystery's blessing. She patted Brakq gently, invoking Her purrtection from Her AWESOME POWERS~!

"OK, so who's gonna be in front of Me?" Mystery deigned to speak. "I don't wanna hurt anyone with My Terrific Might accidentally. You have been warned..."


Invoking Endure Exposure on Brakq

[Ridai]

"Oh hey," Faith says to Mystery, evidently taking the surprise of kitty turning into naked woman in stride, raising two fingers in greeting. "Headin' over to see tentacly horseys, can tag along if you wanna."

Faith hasn't heard much in terms of plans from the others, sooo... she's going back through the cells to the Horse Experiment, to see the tentacle-headed horse. She grabs a mug on the way, firing some water from her flask into it, then making it glow.

To the tentacle horse: "Heya, I'm Faith St. Mary, Faith for short, nice to meet'cha, jus' got here via kidnappin'. You wanna talk a bit about yourself, how life's in here, how you became a tentacle horse?" She offers the cup with the best ever drink to the horse. "Care for a drink?"

Diplomacy [roll0]

[Metastachydium]

As Xyrona shows off the wonderful expressive versatility of Elven ears, Brakq, using her maul as an impromptu crutch has already begun to crawl towards a near exit, only to stop abruptly as she happens on the letter herself. For once, it is not destroyed, no. If it needed destroying, her stupid puddle would've destroyed it, right? No, she figures, it must have a greater purpose.

Locating some writing supplies, she quickly jots onto it a few more lines. This is a stupid place; maybe people will be stupid enough to mail it even so:


Gerlinde you stupid landcow
we knocked out your stupid husband peed on him and stole his funny club
your fancy church deserves a better class of people hitting things to work with
send here no rush

[Alhallor]

---------------------Faith and a horse-------------------

Despite a nekid kitty-person Faith goes towards the "horse experiment" where a horse with a tentacled... Face? Maw? Munches on one leaf of a Dandelion. When Faith introduces herself the horse happily goes towards here and she hears a clear distinct voice in her head.

Oh, hello! I'm horse! You got kidnapped? Oh no, where did you're kids got napped? Are they sleeping soundly?

My life here is pretty nice, I can munch on a lot of grass and leaves, I have that very tasty dandelion over there! And I regularly get snacks!

The tentacles move in a weird pattern and the squid-like head seems to look a bit confused? or angry?

What do you mean, became? I always looked like this.

-------------------------Guard room-----------------

On the other room a letter got some new words written on it, but that is not the only writing available.

On the door where the party emerged from is a plaque with the words "new arrivals" written on it.

On the door opposite this one is a "Water experiment."

On the north is a "Big glass chamber."

and it seems to the south is the "Transport chamber."

[Ridai]

"Hello, horse! Oh no, it's a human manner of speakin'. What I meant is that I got napped 'n' put in a cell over there while I was nappin'. They also took my stuff, but I got it back, so 's all good. Did sleep soundly, too."

The horse getting irritated, Faith raises a hand in apology. "Ah, sorry, my bad, first time talkin' to a horse. How long've you been here? Good ta hear yer havin' a great time. Folks bringin' you snacks also spendin' time with ya? Y'know, talk with ya, play with ya, regular brushies, that sorta thing?"

[Aegis013]

Xyrona reads the signage above the variety of doors. "Fascinating. Which of these chambers should we investigate first?"

[Metastachydium]

Brakq tosses the letter aside and straightens up, insofar as she is able given the limitations imposed by being a fish-shaped thing out of water with only a big hammer to lean on. Can we see, uh, see the big glass chamber? I want to. she asks with a big grin on her face that promises precious little good. I want to, now! Glass is funny. Glass is funny in so many ways.

[Cygnia]

"Glass works," nodded Mystery. Avoiding more of Teh Wet was ALWAYS a Good Idea.

And She then pet the rear of the slighty-pointy eared hoomin's horsey, invoking Her Blessing yet again on the steed JUST in case.

Invoking Endure Exposure upon Asfaloth

[Aegis013]

"Big glass chamber, here we come! Forward Asfaloth, yah." Xyrona deftly maneuvers the horses' bridle and skillfully rides to the door, clip-clopping through the portal first, her jousting gear at the ready.

[Alhallor]

---------------Mind Horse------------

Oh, I have been here forever! As long as I can think off. And yes I get regular brushes, though people don't play much with me. They do ask me pretty often if I want to eat a brain. What even is a brain? Is it tasty?

-----------Big glass chamber----------

You open the big doors to the "Big Glass Chamber" and it opens up to a big room with a lot of glass containers. Almost all of them are filled with a murky fluid, which prevents you from seeing into it. On the container nearest to you, theres a THUNK! and you see something lumpy retreat back into the murky waters.

Around one container are three individuals with white robes, one of them has some purple insignia stitched unto it and presses a needle against one murky container, shortly afterwards, inside the container you see something that resembles an ogre with a lot of fur and the muzzle of a rat with multiple arms, before going murky again. The other two white robes scribble furiously on they're clipboards.

A Brakq in a porcelain shop. (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Aegis013]

Xyrona looks around, Asfaloth making their presence known with a huff.

"What are you three doing here?" she asks, her pleasant sing-song voice betrayed somewhat by the lance under her arm.

[Metastachydium]

Brakq crawls into the room herself, her already bright grin widening into truly morbid proportions. The pointy-eared knight's attempt at starting a conversation barely registers with her. Polite talk's stupid, and this room is beautiful. So many things to hit! So many promises of stupid big bright stuff cracking open with sharp sounds!

Sole issue is, there's really a lot of those. So much so that she is stuck paralysed with indecisio with a moment there. What to hir first? She can't hit all the things first! But then, an idea alights in her head. Hey. Hey, you! Hey! You there, hey! she calls out to the robe people. You know who's, uh, who I am? Ask me! Ask me! Ask me, I want it! she hollers on, her big bulging eyes darting about to locate a container of apprpriately modest size as close to the robes as possible.

[Ridai]

"No idea how they taste, but they're wet, fatty, jelly-like 'n' probably don't taste as nice as yer dandelions do for ya. Things use brains for thinkin', an' it's not nice to eat someone's brain, as that kills the owner of the brain. Tends to make 'em pretty angry with ya. Good thing you get regular brushies, though! People really could play some more with ya, I'll see if I can badger management about that. You enjoy yer dandelion, friend." Faith smiles to the mind horse and heads through the "First trials" door.

[Cygnia]

CAT LABORATORY

The sign was as clear as day to Mystery. If Her missing siblings were anywhere in this damn dungeon, that was a pretty good place to start. Ignoring the lackeys in the white coats, the big glass jars and Her minions for the time being, Mystery headed over there. Yep. Time to save teh day as usual...

Of course, if the white-coated lackeys did anything bad to Her littermates, Mystery would soon be back to inflict Her VENGEANCE~!

Yes. Even if they hurt Dashie too. Who was a Doofus.

[Benoojian]

The cat seemed to know where she was going so Gina followed her.

[Alhallor]

----------------Big glass chamber-------------

The researchers look bewildered at the emerging group and one begins to ask Brakq: "What is your... " But get's smacked by an invisible hand. (Swift action, magical slap)

This is a breach scenario, what should we do?

"Sigh... Don't engage in conversation and use boring magic to bring them down?"

Exactly. (Full-Round action, establishing battle tactics).

The two other researchers procure weird wands and point them at Brakq who begins to feel... Kinda warm, cozy and sleepy?

Two will saves against 15, fail one and you get [roll0] Subdual damage, fail the other one and get [roll1] Subdual damage.

-------------------Cat laboratory------------------

Gnome and Cat-human make they're way sneakily into the Cat laboratory, it seems the researchers are too occupied to notice you two.

You land in a connection room, with a door leading to the laboratory itself, you can hear faint meowing and stressed hissing from the other door who is closed.

-----------------Not a horse----------------

Before Faith can go to the next room a tentacle lands on her shoulder beckoning her to stay, at least for a moment.

Say, it's nice talking to you and it seems like you're looking around, it's weird I feel like... Something is missing and it's not brushes or something else... It's something familiar but I have never seen it before, I think. Could you perhaps look for it while you go prowling about? I'm a bit too scared to really go outside like Asfaloth.

In the next room are two cells in one is a dwarf that kinda looks like part of him have been transformed into stone (perhaps a really lazy Cockatrice picked at him?)

In the other is a very old looking women who... Seems like she's realls small.

Strange, isn't it? (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Auranghzeb]

Muck looked around the transporter room from atop Otto's hump. Surveying the area from a vantage point.


Hey Otto, seems we are on another floor. Let's explore ahead.

[Ridai]

Faith smiles to the tentahorse. "I'll look around for it, don'cha worry, buddy," she says, gently patting the tentacle on her shoulder.

Heading into the next room, she looks to the two people present and behind glass. "Hi, I'm Faith St. Mary, nice ta meet'cha ya can call me Faith, an' I'm explorin' dungeons. Can ya tell me what's goin' on here, how'd ya got in 'ere, if ya wan' out, that sorta thing?"

[Metastachydium]

Brakq makes a very annoyed face. She didn't ask these stupid stupids to make her feel warm inside! That'd be stupid! She asked them to set her blowing **** up! Good of you, uh, to aks. she goes on, pretending EVERYTHING WENT HER OWN WAY ALL ALONG anyhow. I'm Brakq. the ambient lighting begins to flicker. Brakq the HAMMER!!


Will saves: [roll0] and [roll1];
regardless, if there's a glass container or the like, preferably as close to the robes as it gets, weighing less than 30 pounds… You know what happens.

[Cygnia]

MY PEOPLE~! Hearing the cries of distressed kittehs brought out the glare from Mystery. But She had to be smart. And so, She muttered a few words to make sure the door didn't have any tricky magicks on it.

Then, finally realizing the smaller hoomin was with Her, Mystery made sure to invoke Her Blessing of Protection upon Gina as well.


Invoking Magical Insight to see if there's magic stuff on the door.

Then Invoking Endure Exposure on Gina.

Since Mystery knows Feline, can she understand what the poor cats are saying?


Mystery (http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheet.html#id=2727459)
F CN Tibbit Dragonfire Adept, Level 6, Init 4, HP 72/72, DR 2/magic, Speed 20/30
AC 22, Touch 16, Flat-footed 18, Fort 11, Ref 8, Will 8, Base Attack Bonus 3
Fire/Frost/Weaken (DC20/19 Reflex for half dmg, DC 19 Fort for half duration for weaken) Breath Weapon (4d6, )
Least Energy Assault Crystal (fire) MW dagger -1 (1d4-2 +1(fire), 19-20/x2)
Least Energy Assault Crystal (frost) MW dagger -1 (1d4-2 +1(frost), 19-20/x2)
2 EW = 4 hours Mage Armor (+4 Armor, +4 Dex, +2 Size, +2 Natural)
Abilities Str 3, Dex 18, Con 18, Int 14, Wis 13, Cha 8
Condition Dragonblooded
Darkvision 60ft
Low-Light Vision
Endure Exposure: Endure Elements 24/hrs & immune to Mystery's breath weapon
Magic Insight (Detect Magic at will)
+3 save to sleep & paralysis (Dragontouched & Draconic Heritage: Green)
+2 to Acid spells/abilities saves (Draconic Heritage: Green)

[Aegis013]

Hearing the intentions of the strange white robes announced without remorse, Xyrona alerts them to the inevitable combat that will now ensue. "I'm not going to let you put us back in cages. En garde!"

Asfaloth manages to build up quite of bit of momentum on approach and Xyrona thrusts her lance towards center mass of the first of the strange white robe wearers.

Swift action: Test of Mettle
All enemies that hear Xyrona's challenge and have an Int score of 5 or more must make a Will Save DC 14 or be forced to prioritize Xyrona as their target for 7 rounds. No effect if they beat the save.

Spirited Charge: [roll0] to hit
On a 31 [roll1] to confirm

On hit it deals [roll2] damage
On a critical hit it deals [roll3] more damage.

Xyrona is unharmed.
-2 AC from charge leaves her with 16 AC until her next turn.

[Alhallor]

-----------Big glass chamber--------

Brakq! The name echoes through the chamber, get's thrown back and around and back again. BRAKQ! The name seems to somehow increase in volume and it almost seems like the name get's a live on it's own while it searches, hunts for prey.

BRAKQ! One of the glass containers shatters with a loud iteration, spilling murky fluid and glass shards everywhere. Out of it falls a lump of incredibly wet black hair who splorches on the floor.

Xyrona's charge hits one of the researchers with her charge, instead of valiantly fighting her he... Just falls down unconscious, deflating like a wet paper bag.

The other reseacher cry's out in horror as he sees the lump of black hair, that Brakq freed.

"They released Subject #0192!"

He get's toward another door and rips it open in a panic.

The adorned researcher draws her own wand and points it at Xyrona. Sleep!

Make a Will save against 15 or get 5d6 subdual damage, while the intense feeling of you sitting in a warm comfy chair, covered in your favorite blanket, having a hot cocoa in your hands while a biting blizzard roars outside batters you.

Muck sees a fellow rider, though on a weird four-legged beast sprinting away. The sounds of a loudly proclaimed name and battle wash over him and Otto, who is hungry.

---------------Cat laboratory.---------------

Mystery's expert eye doesn't see any magic on the door, but there are several magic auras that even shimmer through the frame of the door, but not strong enough to make out anything concrete. The cry's of her brethren speak of.

They want to get out, they're uncomfortable, they don't have enough space, they are too much on a too small area. You hear one that speaks in an undecipherable accent, the cacophony is too much too hear any concrete voices, you're not sure if you're close brethren are here.

--------------First experiments room------------

Both the dwarf and the old woman look up when Faith is talking, they are both in similiar cells like Faith St. Mary before, not giving them much room, though the bars the dwarf is behind seem to have some dents on them.

The dwarf laughs a rumbly, rocky laugh. "Out? How many times have you tried that? Lured us with fake promises of an escape? It's alright I stay right here."

The old woman speaks with a tone of voice that seems to fit more with a young girl. "Oh, hush, you could at least play along! Nice meeting you Faith I'm Edora and that grumpy fellow is Boulderdash strongarm of the stonebreaker clan. I can't really tell you what's going on, some white-robed people seem to be running the place and collecting weird things? I heard some stuff about experiments too and it seems lately they have been injecting some stuff into people, I don't really know why they do all this, though. I never found out how Boulderdash got in here, but I woke up one day and was here. It would be very nice if you could get us out of here, but they already gave us some opportunities to get out, but they did catch us all the time when we wandered around a bit."

They let it out! The fools!? (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1ovFqlgEmHCDDW-Ho3b8ThJYaGuP4enCEE9H_JUn4Lkg/edit?pli=1#gid=0)

[Ridai]

"Hey, no prob," Faith says, pointing her finger at the bars and beginning to blast them with divine power. As that is doing its magic, she says "Got here with a few other people who're in the process of gettin' out, so y'all just gotta hang back a bit, I reckon. Met some guards, turned out evil 'n' way too stick-happy, they're havin' nappy time now. Did also meet a nice tentacle horsey, though."

[Aegis013]

"Not this time." Xyrona says, shaking her head to clear the clearly illusory feeling. Asfaloth clip-clops forward slightly and the tip of the knight's lance once again thrusts towards center mass of its target.

Passed the Will save here (https://forums.giantitp.com/showsinglepost.php?p=26016318&postcount=26).

5ft step so the lance can reach the next strange whit robed figure

[roll0]
On a 29, [roll1] to confirm

On hit it deals [roll2] damage
On a crit, it deals [roll3] more damage

Xyrona is unharmed.

[Cygnia]

With a grimace upon Her kyoot (yet hoomin) face, Mystery decided it was time for the direct approach to save Her fellow kitteh-kind. Even if they weren't Her littermates, purrhaps they had seen them! Besides, given what those stoopid guards wanted to do to cats in that note back in the first room, it was time to show these creeps just why you don't [BLEEP] with cats!

But first, She had to open the door...

[Metastachydium]

Unaware of how useful she could suddenly be for several someones who probably think of her as something vaguely resembling an ally in the adjacent rooms, Brakq appears to have been hit with one of those weird laughter spells as as her very name brings wanton mayhem into the world, sending shards flying, hair (hair?) hitting the floor and stupid robes stupidly fleeing the room in stupid horror for their stupid lives (okay, just one robe, but still). She can't seem to stop flopping about on the ground, shaking and laughing like a maniac. This, uh, this is too funny. she explains to the remaining robe in a moment of teary-eyed half-calm, throwing in a GLASS-SHATTERING MOUNTAIN HAMMER STRIKE ATTACK!! immediately afterwards, swinging her maul at the closest jar that looks too big and heavy to smash with simply intoroducing herself to it. And back to laughing she is.


Punishing MOUNTAIN HAMMER a big glass container nearby: [roll0] for [roll1] plus [roll2], bypasing all hardness as usual