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Emperor Demonking
2008-01-01, 11:14 AM
Palladin 1: Kill the babies.
Sorcerer 1: Go to the angry red dragon and say "i might be your great grandson."

The Faceless
2008-01-01, 11:19 AM
Barbarian: Do not rage at the high society ball. Girls down in taverns may be impressed by a wild and noble warrior telling them tales of battle and showing off his skills, duchesses and ladies usually prefer more genteel men. (If one happens to express an interest, wait for the inevitable assassins to come in before getting to the war cries)

Newtkeeper
2008-01-01, 11:20 AM
Druid- torch forests because you are allowed to be chaotic neutral.
Rogue- get caught stealing.
Mage- overshadow the party just because it's easy.
Samuri- take that class.

Tallis
2008-01-01, 11:55 AM
Mage: do not specialize in illusions if you don't have a good imagination.
do not attack the ogre with your dagger.
Paladin: do not eat your opponenets even if you are immune to any diseases they may carry.

Prophaniti
2008-01-01, 12:41 PM
Things not to do:

Cleric: go completely Divine Power/Righteous Might combat-focused. You should at least help heal a little bit, it's only courteous.
Healer: get hurt/incapacitated/damaged in any way, ever
Deepwood Sniper: Draw the dragon's attention with a double critical when you're all alone on top of the castle wall and the rest of the party is in the courtyard. (happened)
Paladin: be an @$$
Psychic Warrior: show up the fighter all the time. Poor guy's trying hard, let him have a few kills.

Irreverent Fool
2008-01-01, 12:49 PM
Things not to do...

Fighter (in full plate): Take archery feats and stand in the back ALL THE TIME when you have a mundane longbow, a tower shield +2, and a party full of people in light- or no- armor.
Rogue: Hide behind the wizard
Wizard: Have your contingency to be to teleport you far, far away. The DM balanced this encounter to having you here. That means we're all going to die if you're not.
Wizard (again): Talk about your familiar and/or your spellbook with any frequency. This just gives the DM ideas.

Idea Man
2008-01-01, 01:48 PM
Monk: Don't complain, about anything. You aren't the best at anything, everybody knows it. If you wanted to have that kind of character, you wouldn't be a monk.

Ninja: Never admit you're a ninja. You're a rogue, scout, monk, bard, really, anything but a ninja. Unless you're "ronin", then you can walk around in your black pj's and scare people. :smallbiggrin:

Ranger: Don't forget to take survival. You have one iconic job, so for the love of pete, do it well.

Zenos
2008-01-01, 02:05 PM
Wizard- Multiclass to any other base class.

Paladin- Have sex with every woman he meets. He's meant to be a paragon of virtue, not an Incubus.

Sleet
2008-01-01, 02:23 PM
Paladin: Take on Sweeny Todd as a mentor and career advisor.

CactusAir
2008-01-01, 07:17 PM
-Any Class: Use the following core PRC's when you access to vastly superior stuff from splatbooks: Arcane Archer, Assassin, Arcane Trickster.

-Warmage: be one.

-Chameleon: Fail to max out bluff.

Felius
2008-01-01, 07:29 PM
Paladin- Have sex with every woman he meets. He's meant to be a paragon of virtue, not an Incubus.
Except if you are a Paladin of Sune, then it's fair game.

Prophaniti
2008-01-01, 07:37 PM
-Warmage: be one.

Ouch, no love for the Warmage, huh? I enjoyed playing one...

Barbarian: Bash in the door across the hall from the one the rogue is checking because you're bored. This will always be the one door that is actually trapped. (I did that one. High hp meant I was the only one who found it amusing...)
Swordsage: Use your awesome Shadow Jaunt to jump next to the BBEG while the party is still contending with minions. You will hurt him, but he'll one-shot you. (Me again. I lead by example:smallbiggrin:)

Tengu
2008-01-01, 07:43 PM
Rogue - steal from the party, or pickpocket people around for the hell of it. Kleptomania WILL bring trouble.

Collin152
2008-01-01, 07:58 PM
Wizard: Prepare Mending on a whim.

CactusAir
2008-01-01, 08:12 PM
Ouch, no love for the Warmage, huh? I enjoyed playing one...


Both the fluff (background description) and the mechanics of Warmage scream "NPC class" to me. Past level 6, it's about on par with a mediocrely played monk. On levels 2-6, it's actually pretty decent.

NPC classes can be fun though. I'm a fan of 1 level commoner dips for commoner flaws. (Delicious, Chicken Infested, etc.)

-Shining Blade of Heironious: Be one. I mean it. Honestly, I think Adept levels would do far more for you at that point.

-Frenzied Bezerker: Fail to arrange for some mechanism for NOT killing your own party. No one likes a TKer

-Malconvoker: Fail to prepare summoning spells.

-Druid: Not take natural spell.

-Swashbuckler: Not be a Daring Outlaw.

-Unseen Seer: Not take Hunter's Eye or Divine Insight.

Duke Malagigi
2008-01-01, 08:35 PM
Paladin- Have sex with every woman he meets. He's meant to be a paragon of virtue, not an Incubus.

Why do you think paladins need high Charisma scores anyway?

The Faceless
2008-01-01, 08:39 PM
Why do you think paladins need high Charisma scores anyway?
Hey, no paladin of mine ever swore a vow of chastity.

Reinboom
2008-01-01, 08:51 PM
Paladin- Have sex with every woman he meets. He's meant to be a paragon of virtue, not an Incubus.
Woo... at least men are fair game. :smalltongue:

Druid - Satisfy wild shape curiosities...


-Druid: Not take natural spell.
Druid - Take natural spell. (Sorry, shapeshift variant only here :smalltongue: )

Planar Shepherd - Complain about power.

CactusAir
2008-01-01, 09:04 PM
Planar Shepherd - Complain about power.

Planar shepherds become vastly less of a problem if you ban access to Dal Quor, which by the fluff you should anyway.

Danin
2008-01-01, 09:21 PM
Warlock: Challenge the vampire to a duel because you can use spider climb to get out of mele... (I did that one)

Warrior: Duel wield whips while weaing black studded leather armour because it'll be cool. (Also did this, found out that improved trip doest work well with bladed whips)

Rogue: Assume you will pass your tumble check. (I'd only fail on a 3 or less, what were the odds of that?)

Reinboom
2008-01-01, 09:29 PM
Planar shepherds become vastly less of a problem if you ban access to Dal Quor, which by the fluff you should anyway.

I don't recall where all the planes match... but...
The "slowed time" realms for planar shepherd: Trap yourself in the bubble with opponents. You're a druid, you can take it. Now your teammates have the multiple turns benefit.
The fire plane: Constant fire damage. Oh, and free wishes.

these are the next big contestors to the dream plane.
Really, nearly every plane has an issue of some kind, if not for the plane itself but for the fact that you get (Su) abilities of the outsiders from the plane. This is abusable to an extreme.


Warlock - Pelvic thrust blast.

Collin152
2008-01-01, 09:30 PM
Planar shepherds become vastly less of a problem if you ban access to Dal Quor, which by the fluff you should anyway.

What is the deal with a bubble of Dal Quor?

Reinboom
2008-01-01, 09:32 PM
What is the deal with a bubble of Dal Quor?

10:1 time property. You, and all your teammates in the bubble, have 10 rounds for each round outside of it.

CactusAir
2008-01-01, 09:46 PM
10:1 time property. You, and all your teammates in the bubble, have 10 rounds for each round outside of it.

It's like free timestop, which you shoul'd never get, because Dal quor has been detached from the materiel plane since like 30,000 years ago.

I forgot about the fire plane thing, though. my bad.

EvilElitest
2008-01-01, 09:54 PM
Paladin-Become a Grey Guard, ever.
from
EE

Collin152
2008-01-01, 10:17 PM
10:1 time property. You, and all your teammates in the bubble, have 10 rounds for each round outside of it.

Wow. That is pretty bad.
It's timestop for your entire party, but it lasts longer. And then it keeps going.
Would the bubbles duration be based on time inside the bubble or outside?
I can't remember where the things from anyways...

Ashes
2008-01-01, 10:22 PM
Paladin-Become a Grey Guard, ever.
from
EE

Why not? It seems pretty interesting to me.

CabbageTheif
2008-01-01, 10:30 PM
hexblade-take weapons proficiencey shruiken
rogue/fighter-if all your feats are to two-weapon-fighting, dont decide to fight using only a katana because it looks cooler!

an kobold
2008-01-01, 11:45 PM
Arcane Caster: Cast magic missile into the darkness repeatedly. Eventually, you'll hit something that you don't want to hit.

Paladin: Say your "Satan Sense is tingling" when you Detect Evil.

TheOOB
2008-01-01, 11:46 PM
Wizard - Don't try and use physics to get more out of a spell then intended, magic doesn't follow physics.

Collin152
2008-01-01, 11:48 PM
.. very closely.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-01-01, 11:50 PM
Sorceror: Walk up to a giant imposing door in the last part of a dungeon call and knock because you're party can't decide which way to go. 30 feet away from the rest of the party. Then don't try to bluff your way into thinking you're actually undead and not with the adventurers.

And then call the lich ugly.

Yay experience!

masamonkey
2008-01-02, 01:02 AM
OK, for all those 'backkseat DM' gloryhounds...Don't...:

Wizard:...try to steal the Rogue or Ranger's thunder with invisibility and then whine when no ranks of move silent ruins everything. Same sort of thing with Mage Hand, Knock and Detect Traps.
...min/max your highest stat in Con if you intend to ever be an effective spell-caster higher than fourth level.

Any Class:...assume the nearest person to you picked your pocket when you eventually realize your purse is lighter and attack.
...throw magic items into the sea because your class can't use them and they're 'evil-looking.'
...run off NPCs another class needs to learn from, etc. because they are 'evil-looking.'
...take Lvl 1 as 3rd edition ranger and try to get later levels as 3.5 edition ranger. Also, don't tell off or or try to show up the 12th level druid, saying your one level of third edition ranger for two weapon fighting makes you a 'man of the woods.'
...assume that, 'by the numbers,' it is so improbable to run into a high level NPC at random in a populated area that they can push everyone around.

This is all from expirience with a backseat DM and whether they get what they want then and there or not, they usually end up losing in the end.