The Unknown
2008-01-07, 05:42 AM
I do not know you, you do now know me, what I do is ask questions, what I wish is not answers, but only to create more questions, for the truely wise do not answer, they ask, unless my own wisdom is but a wish.
Every day I change and every minute I stay the same, I am not the same, for always I am different, I do not agree with myself in the last statement, neither do I in the next, but I will let you now glimpse into my mind.
The following is a MSN conversation I have had just some months ago, it is completely raw and unchanged, including typo's and mistells.
--
-Pedro H- siger:
Hi.
[email protected] siger:
Hello
-Pedro H- siger:
How's it been?
[email protected] siger:
Better
-Pedro H- siger:
"Better"?
-Pedro H- siger:
What was wrong beforehand?
[email protected] siger:
Nothing
[email protected] siger:
Its just better
[email protected] siger:
I was thinking of taking a vow of nonviolence and go completely pacifistic...
-Pedro H- siger:
...
-Pedro H- siger:
-_-
[email protected] siger:
Im serious
-Pedro H- siger:
Damn you... now who am I gonna kill stuff with?
[email protected] siger:
Im deadly serious here
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm... well nonviolence is good but.
-Pedro H- siger:
What if you have to defend yourself? Hmm?
-Pedro H- siger:
Most people who are violent are too ignorant to be affected by words.
-Pedro H- siger:
And, you just contradicted yourself. You're -deadly- serious about taking a vow of -nonviolence- and -pacifism-? Deadly = violence.
-Pedro H- siger:
And, -have- you been violent before?
[email protected] siger:
Im not sinking to their level... And yes, I have, which is why I wont anymore
[email protected] siger:
I cant take it anymore...
[email protected] siger:
There is so much wrong with this world, I dont want to be part of it
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm? You have, how so?
-Pedro H- siger:
Mmh... I used to say that to myself but, then I faced the truth, if I'm not wrong, I won't last long, at least that's -my- way of thinking. I always thought that human beings are -born- in/with such wrongness.
[email protected] siger:
Yes they are
[email protected] siger:
Humans are basically flawed
[email protected] siger:
Being nonviolent, being peaceful
[email protected] siger:
Is not human
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
Depends on the point of view of many people, to some, being violent and psychotic, or just simply wrong, is utterly in human, and others think that, being wrong, is being human, and not being wrong, is inhuman, and won't help you last long.
[email protected] siger:
It wont, if I let someone hit me while I dont fight back I will not last long
[email protected] siger:
I dont care anymore
-Pedro H- siger:
You don't care?
[email protected] siger:
It wont break me, if I can only live in this world by creating pain, I will not
-Pedro H- siger:
About your life, about your survival, about anything?
-Pedro H- siger:
Creating pain, makes people strong. Those who endure pain, become stronger. "That which does not kill me, makes me stronger."
[email protected] siger:
I wont hit back
-Pedro H- siger:
And what if you don't manage to endure the pain whoever hits you will create?
[email protected] siger:
I will die
-Pedro H- siger:
And you'll just accept that?
-Pedro H- siger:
You'll accept to fade into nothingness? To go quietly under the night?
-Pedro H- siger:
That's as far away from being human, as you can possibly get.
[email protected] siger:
Simply put, yes
[email protected] siger:
Discipline...
-Pedro H- siger:
Discipline, is not as same as being foolish, no offense meant, is actually, the oposite of it.
-Pedro H- siger:
By the way, sorry if I take a little while to respond, I'm a little sick here.
[email protected] siger:
Yes, but discipline, if I can live to that, if I can live being inhuman, and accept not creating more pain when hit with it, I dont care about mortal life anymore
-Pedro H- siger:
Why not?
-Pedro H- siger:
You yourself said that life is meaningless, and if it truly is so, then, after we're gone, there must be nothing for us, nothing at all, not even a void, -nothing-. And this would be the only time we'd have to enjoy life, to... well... you get the point. And, you'd... let it go, just like that?
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
Emptiness is enlightenment
-Pedro H- siger:
And what will be worth that enlightenment.... if you won't be able to use it, won't be able to pass it on to anyone, hell, won't even be conscious of said enlightenment because there is -nothing- in emptiness, not even your consciousness?
[email protected] siger:
Exactly
[email protected] siger:
So what does it matter?
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps whatever happens, whatever you do in life, won't matter in the long run. Yes, that saying "What we do in life, echoes in eternity." is just plain stupid, it won't matter. But, it will all end, so right -now-, it matters, because you will never get a chance at it again.
-Pedro H- siger:
You'll eventually live with regret.
[email protected] siger:
Of course I will
[email protected] siger:
It dosnt matter
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh
-Pedro H- siger:
You say that now.
-Pedro H- siger:
But let us see if you will still think the same after heck-knows how many ears of living with regret as your only companion.
[email protected] siger:
Of course I will say something else
[email protected] siger:
It dosnt matter
[email protected] siger:
Only few years later, it wont matter
-Pedro H- siger:
So what matters, nothing, nothing at all? Feelings, nothing?
-Pedro H- siger:
Dude, seriously, you should try thinking in different ways. If it were true, that nothing really matters... then we wouldn't even exist.
[email protected] siger:
We dont
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes we do
[email protected] siger:
You say that to yourself
[email protected] siger:
Thats why you think we do
-Pedro H- siger:
Prove that we don't then I will change my mind.
[email protected] siger:
I cant
-Pedro H- siger:
A-ha!
-Pedro H- siger:
See?
[email protected] siger:
Can you proove the opposite?
-Pedro H- siger:
That's because -we do- exist.
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes
-Pedro H- siger:
We feel, we think, we evolve, we love, we hate, we hurt, we create, we destroy, we explore... I could go on the whole day.
-Pedro H- siger:
We -live-, we -die-
-Pedro H- siger:
We reproduce, damnit.
[email protected] siger:
But you cannot proove any of that
[email protected] siger:
All you can proove is, that is what you think is going on
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh, I can't prove?
-Pedro H- siger:
Yeah right, then how do you explain you and me, right now, you sitting in your PC, right next to your bed, and me, sitting in front of my PC, we both are talking, thinking, heck pondering on the meaning of life.
[email protected] siger:
We arent
-Pedro H- siger:
Prove that we aren't.
[email protected] siger:
Prove that we are
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
Alright, do you believe in spirits, demons, devils, all that so-called "other world" the "afterlife"?
[email protected] siger:
No
-Pedro H- siger:
Then perhaps that is the way to prove it to yourself, that we either do, or don't exist.
[email protected] siger:
I dont believe in this life neither...
-Pedro H- siger:
Find a way to contact all that stuff, it is possible, if you actually manage, then you've been proved wrong, that we do exist. If you don't manage to, then we don't.
[email protected] siger:
How can I?
[email protected] siger:
I dont even know how to contact this stuff
-Pedro H- siger:
Neither do I, but I know its possible, trust me. Believe it or not, my aunt believes that.... she's -not- screwed up in the head, but she once tried to make me believe that stuff... and try to do that stuff.
-Pedro H- siger:
I've seen her do it.
-Pedro H- siger:
Its possible, now -how- to do it... that i don't know.
-Pedro H- siger:
Another thing...
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps I shouldn't ask this one....
-Pedro H- siger:
Meh nevermind that last line. If you think that we don't exist, then... why? Why continue? Why be a pacifist? Why think about swearing that pacifism vow?
[email protected] siger:
For those who still believe
-Pedro H- siger:
You just sounded like you cared about life, about non-violence, about everything nthat exists around you. Now you don't care anymore?
[email protected] siger:
Heheh...
-Pedro H- siger:
Well?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hah... sounds like I got you.
[email protected] siger:
My mind is chaos... I dont believe in anything, but I believe in everything...
My way of thinking and seeing the world is never the same Pedro -.-
[email protected] siger:
Thats also why im not the same person as yesterday
-Pedro H- siger:
So I see.
-Pedro H- siger:
And to think that I sometimes think that my mind's chaotic.
-Pedro H- siger:
"Thats also why im not the same person as yesterday" Regarding that.... well... neither am I, no-one is the same person they were yesterday... but if I elaborated on why I tihnk that then I'd go into some half-scientific explanation
[email protected] siger:
Every second we die and every second we are born again
[email protected] siger:
Even a moment of silence changes us
[email protected] siger:
We are not the same, our memory, our personality is different
-Pedro H- siger:
Die, yes... born again? How so?
[email protected] siger:
Are you the same person as you were just a second ago as you read this?
[email protected] siger:
Even if the word has changed nothing, or even if it hasnt even changed your memory, you are now one second older
-Pedro H- siger:
Possibly, depends on what sense.
-Pedro H- siger:
Physical, biological? I'm not the same person I was a milisecond ago.
-Pedro H- siger:
In thought? Mind? I'm the same.
[email protected] siger:
So you can honestly say, the thought you have in your head now, is the same as a milisecond ago?
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
My main thought, is someone I'm thinking of, been thinking the whole day. But beneath that "main thought" there are countless others that I tihnk and stop thinking.
[email protected] siger:
So the main thought stay the same for you, dosnt change?
[email protected] siger:
How... Very... Interesting...
[email protected] siger:
My soul, my mind.... It is all liquid.. There is nothing constant there...
-Pedro H- siger:
Volatile, like quicksilver, huh?
-Pedro H- siger:
Not volatile, sorry... but changing.
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
Its like a buddhist school of thought, everything about you is liquid, the mind, the body, and the soul
[email protected] siger:
Nothing is constant, at all...
[email protected] siger:
What you see dosnt exist when you dont observe it...
-Pedro H- siger:
And when you do observe it?
[email protected] siger:
It exists, but only because you see it.. It dosnt REALLY exist, but the image exists, and the sensation of it being there exists...
[email protected] siger:
When you close your eyes, the sensation of it being there still exists, its texture still exist if you touch it, but the image does not-Pedro H- siger:
So it -does- exist when you don't observe it, unlike what you said.
-Pedro H- siger:
You just don't -see- it
[email protected] siger:
No, its the other way around
[email protected] siger:
It DOSNT exist when you observe it, but the sensation of it existing does
[email protected] siger:
Here is a green stick...
The green stick dosnt exist...
A picture, and a feeling of the stick, and of that it is green, exists
[email protected] siger:
But the stick itself, does not
[email protected] siger:
And once the feeling and picture is gone, it dosnt exist
-Pedro H- siger:
So
-Pedro H- siger:
The color exists,
-Pedro H- siger:
But the object, doesn't?
[email protected] siger:
The colour dosnt exist, your eyes reaction to believe they are seeing it does...
[email protected] siger:
Its like, what do you feel when you walk into a church?
[email protected] siger:
Well?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
Nothing, nothing at all. Most people say they feel happiness when they walk into a church, or come out of a mission or something. I don't feel diddly squat
-Pedro H- siger:
Sure, I feel the ground, the cold stone etc etc etc... but nothing else.
[email protected] siger:
What about walking into your own home?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
That too, nothing.
[email protected] siger:
Funny, you are possibly closer to understand this than any other people...
-Pedro H- siger:
Really?
-Pedro H- siger:
How so?
-Pedro H- siger:
I don't feel a thing, becauseI never stopped to think of it.
[email protected] siger:
When you look at "The wall"... That wall does nothing to you, the wall dosnt do so that you see it, it is you, who do it to yourself, you think you see the wall
-Pedro H- siger:
So it is entirely unrelated to his living self, to his life.
-Pedro H- siger:
Just to something he clings to.
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
So is what you see, and what you expirence
[email protected] siger:
All can be changed if you see it differently
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
-Pedro H- siger:
The wall is still the same, nothing changes, not even a single damn brick changes.
-Pedro H- siger:
People see different things, but that does not change what the thing they see is.
[email protected] siger:
Or do they?
[email protected] siger:
The thing dosnt exist
-Pedro H- siger:
In truth?
[email protected] siger:
Only what you see
-Pedro H- siger:
They think they do.
-Pedro H- siger:
But they only see, and feel what others want them to.
[email protected] siger:
You can never prove that the thing really exist, all you can prove is that YOU can see it
-Pedro H- siger:
E-heh...
[email protected] siger:
If others can see it to, you can never know if its the same thing
-Pedro H- siger:
If it didn't exist, then it wouldn't provoke such vastly different feelings in each person.
-Pedro H- siger:
They wouldn't feel a thing, just as I do, or rather, don't.
[email protected] siger:
Why wouldnt it?
[email protected] siger:
I told you, the feeling and the fact that it IS there exist, but it ISNT there
[email protected] siger:
Only the picture and feel of it
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
THe bed dosnt exist, the softness of the bed and the picture of a bed exists to you
-Pedro H- siger:
But the picture and feeling can't exist on their own, they are part of each other, and of something bigger, through which the picture, -and- the feelings are sent to whoever is near, if that bigger self didn't exist, then neither the picture, nor the feeling wouldn't exist to us, because they would never arrive to us.
-Pedro H- siger:
The wall, in this case, is the "bigger thing" that exist, through wich the feelings, and the picture, is sent.
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps the reality might be that its nothing more than a wooden stick in the middle of nowhere, but we see, and feel it, as if it were a church
[email protected] siger:
No its not.... It dosnt HAVE to be, you keep telling yourself, holding unto the belief that these things exist, and the only reason they do exist is because you NEED them to exist, you cant possibly think of a world where they dont
[email protected] siger:
Thats why you are so sure that they exist, thats why you defend it
-Pedro H- siger:
ACtually
-Pedro H- siger:
I did not defended that it exists
-Pedro H- siger:
It might be something, insignificant, that we see as something important to us.
-Pedro H- siger:
this
-Pedro H- siger:
thus*
-Pedro H- siger:
It exists...
-Pedro H- siger:
To us...
[email protected] siger:
Yes you do, actually... You keep telling that these things exist, you keep insisting upon that the wall exists... Even if, it dosnt.. It dosnt, if you are just willing, to one second, believe it does not exist, it dosnt...
[email protected] siger:
Try, try to think it dosnt exist...
-Pedro H- siger:
Are you saying that, if I think the wall doesn't exist, then it truly doesn't exist? Its an illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
But if you keep, insisting it does...
[email protected] siger:
You feed the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Ah! But therein lies the complication, how can one hope, to suddenly think, to suddenly believe, that something doesn't exist, when their whole lives, their whole existence, they've been taught that it does? Hmm?
[email protected] siger:
They cant, and thats why mad people get locked away
[email protected] siger:
They have seen the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Ah, but what if -we- are also nothing but an illusion? Hmm? That our bodies, minds, our very cells, are an illusion? How can an illusion, hope to break another illusion? And what if we believe that -we- are an illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Now you get it...
[email protected] siger:
The Illusion exists.. Because...
[email protected] siger:
We are illusions, the world we live in is a Illusion...
[email protected] siger:
The illusion feeds the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Then what is the truth behind all this illusion?
[email protected] siger:
When you find that, one truth... The one truth, the one thing which is true, without requiring us to exist, without requiring US, to make a meaning to it...
[email protected] siger:
I said it before...
[email protected] siger:
That is the meaning of life, that which exist without us having to make it exist
[email protected] siger:
That which is a illusion, before we make it into one
-Pedro H- siger:
Wish to know the most hopeless part of all this? " without requiring us to exist, without requiring US" We are incapable of even glimpsing at the hope of thinking of anything that does not require us to exist. We are incapable, of thinking of something that doesn't requrie us to exist.
-Pedro H- siger:
So
-Pedro H- siger:
Even though we know that we are nothing but illusions
[email protected] siger:
We depend on those
-Pedro H- siger:
We'll never hope to find the truth behind that illusion
[email protected] siger:
Indeed...
[email protected] siger:
Now you understand it...
[email protected] siger:
Now you understand it all..
-Pedro H- siger:
So why not accept the illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Yes, why not
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh, that leads to another truth.
-Pedro H- siger:
We never changed, you are the same person that you were secodns aog, or rather, the same illusion that you were, nothing changed... you only -think- that it changed.
-Pedro H- siger:
ago*
[email protected] siger:
Of course, but it didnt exist in the first place
[email protected] siger:
Neither did my statement
-Pedro H- siger:
Exactly
[email protected] siger:
Or this log someone is reading currently..
-Pedro H- siger:
That's why you never changed.
-Pedro H- siger:
To say that an illusion exists is completely incorrect, because an illusion is exactly something that does not exist, but we have no way of saying in such manner.
-Pedro H- siger:
What log? Eh?
-Pedro H- siger:
Someone?
[email protected] siger:
This convo is too interesting to just forget
-Pedro H- siger:
Hehehe... ditto.
[email protected] siger:
Thank you for the chat, it has been most enlightening
-Pedro H- siger:
No, thank -you-
--
Looking back I agree little, but saying exactly off why, would take far too long, and I have already taken too much of your time, I was interested to see how exactly you would find this log interesting, and if you have read this far, please do comment.
I do not care off typos or other faults, only viewpoints.
- Edin
Every day I change and every minute I stay the same, I am not the same, for always I am different, I do not agree with myself in the last statement, neither do I in the next, but I will let you now glimpse into my mind.
The following is a MSN conversation I have had just some months ago, it is completely raw and unchanged, including typo's and mistells.
--
-Pedro H- siger:
Hi.
[email protected] siger:
Hello
-Pedro H- siger:
How's it been?
[email protected] siger:
Better
-Pedro H- siger:
"Better"?
-Pedro H- siger:
What was wrong beforehand?
[email protected] siger:
Nothing
[email protected] siger:
Its just better
[email protected] siger:
I was thinking of taking a vow of nonviolence and go completely pacifistic...
-Pedro H- siger:
...
-Pedro H- siger:
-_-
[email protected] siger:
Im serious
-Pedro H- siger:
Damn you... now who am I gonna kill stuff with?
[email protected] siger:
Im deadly serious here
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm... well nonviolence is good but.
-Pedro H- siger:
What if you have to defend yourself? Hmm?
-Pedro H- siger:
Most people who are violent are too ignorant to be affected by words.
-Pedro H- siger:
And, you just contradicted yourself. You're -deadly- serious about taking a vow of -nonviolence- and -pacifism-? Deadly = violence.
-Pedro H- siger:
And, -have- you been violent before?
[email protected] siger:
Im not sinking to their level... And yes, I have, which is why I wont anymore
[email protected] siger:
I cant take it anymore...
[email protected] siger:
There is so much wrong with this world, I dont want to be part of it
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm? You have, how so?
-Pedro H- siger:
Mmh... I used to say that to myself but, then I faced the truth, if I'm not wrong, I won't last long, at least that's -my- way of thinking. I always thought that human beings are -born- in/with such wrongness.
[email protected] siger:
Yes they are
[email protected] siger:
Humans are basically flawed
[email protected] siger:
Being nonviolent, being peaceful
[email protected] siger:
Is not human
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
Depends on the point of view of many people, to some, being violent and psychotic, or just simply wrong, is utterly in human, and others think that, being wrong, is being human, and not being wrong, is inhuman, and won't help you last long.
[email protected] siger:
It wont, if I let someone hit me while I dont fight back I will not last long
[email protected] siger:
I dont care anymore
-Pedro H- siger:
You don't care?
[email protected] siger:
It wont break me, if I can only live in this world by creating pain, I will not
-Pedro H- siger:
About your life, about your survival, about anything?
-Pedro H- siger:
Creating pain, makes people strong. Those who endure pain, become stronger. "That which does not kill me, makes me stronger."
[email protected] siger:
I wont hit back
-Pedro H- siger:
And what if you don't manage to endure the pain whoever hits you will create?
[email protected] siger:
I will die
-Pedro H- siger:
And you'll just accept that?
-Pedro H- siger:
You'll accept to fade into nothingness? To go quietly under the night?
-Pedro H- siger:
That's as far away from being human, as you can possibly get.
[email protected] siger:
Simply put, yes
[email protected] siger:
Discipline...
-Pedro H- siger:
Discipline, is not as same as being foolish, no offense meant, is actually, the oposite of it.
-Pedro H- siger:
By the way, sorry if I take a little while to respond, I'm a little sick here.
[email protected] siger:
Yes, but discipline, if I can live to that, if I can live being inhuman, and accept not creating more pain when hit with it, I dont care about mortal life anymore
-Pedro H- siger:
Why not?
-Pedro H- siger:
You yourself said that life is meaningless, and if it truly is so, then, after we're gone, there must be nothing for us, nothing at all, not even a void, -nothing-. And this would be the only time we'd have to enjoy life, to... well... you get the point. And, you'd... let it go, just like that?
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
Emptiness is enlightenment
-Pedro H- siger:
And what will be worth that enlightenment.... if you won't be able to use it, won't be able to pass it on to anyone, hell, won't even be conscious of said enlightenment because there is -nothing- in emptiness, not even your consciousness?
[email protected] siger:
Exactly
[email protected] siger:
So what does it matter?
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps whatever happens, whatever you do in life, won't matter in the long run. Yes, that saying "What we do in life, echoes in eternity." is just plain stupid, it won't matter. But, it will all end, so right -now-, it matters, because you will never get a chance at it again.
-Pedro H- siger:
You'll eventually live with regret.
[email protected] siger:
Of course I will
[email protected] siger:
It dosnt matter
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh
-Pedro H- siger:
You say that now.
-Pedro H- siger:
But let us see if you will still think the same after heck-knows how many ears of living with regret as your only companion.
[email protected] siger:
Of course I will say something else
[email protected] siger:
It dosnt matter
[email protected] siger:
Only few years later, it wont matter
-Pedro H- siger:
So what matters, nothing, nothing at all? Feelings, nothing?
-Pedro H- siger:
Dude, seriously, you should try thinking in different ways. If it were true, that nothing really matters... then we wouldn't even exist.
[email protected] siger:
We dont
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes we do
[email protected] siger:
You say that to yourself
[email protected] siger:
Thats why you think we do
-Pedro H- siger:
Prove that we don't then I will change my mind.
[email protected] siger:
I cant
-Pedro H- siger:
A-ha!
-Pedro H- siger:
See?
[email protected] siger:
Can you proove the opposite?
-Pedro H- siger:
That's because -we do- exist.
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes
-Pedro H- siger:
We feel, we think, we evolve, we love, we hate, we hurt, we create, we destroy, we explore... I could go on the whole day.
-Pedro H- siger:
We -live-, we -die-
-Pedro H- siger:
We reproduce, damnit.
[email protected] siger:
But you cannot proove any of that
[email protected] siger:
All you can proove is, that is what you think is going on
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh, I can't prove?
-Pedro H- siger:
Yeah right, then how do you explain you and me, right now, you sitting in your PC, right next to your bed, and me, sitting in front of my PC, we both are talking, thinking, heck pondering on the meaning of life.
[email protected] siger:
We arent
-Pedro H- siger:
Prove that we aren't.
[email protected] siger:
Prove that we are
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
Alright, do you believe in spirits, demons, devils, all that so-called "other world" the "afterlife"?
[email protected] siger:
No
-Pedro H- siger:
Then perhaps that is the way to prove it to yourself, that we either do, or don't exist.
[email protected] siger:
I dont believe in this life neither...
-Pedro H- siger:
Find a way to contact all that stuff, it is possible, if you actually manage, then you've been proved wrong, that we do exist. If you don't manage to, then we don't.
[email protected] siger:
How can I?
[email protected] siger:
I dont even know how to contact this stuff
-Pedro H- siger:
Neither do I, but I know its possible, trust me. Believe it or not, my aunt believes that.... she's -not- screwed up in the head, but she once tried to make me believe that stuff... and try to do that stuff.
-Pedro H- siger:
I've seen her do it.
-Pedro H- siger:
Its possible, now -how- to do it... that i don't know.
-Pedro H- siger:
Another thing...
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps I shouldn't ask this one....
-Pedro H- siger:
Meh nevermind that last line. If you think that we don't exist, then... why? Why continue? Why be a pacifist? Why think about swearing that pacifism vow?
[email protected] siger:
For those who still believe
-Pedro H- siger:
You just sounded like you cared about life, about non-violence, about everything nthat exists around you. Now you don't care anymore?
[email protected] siger:
Heheh...
-Pedro H- siger:
Well?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hah... sounds like I got you.
[email protected] siger:
My mind is chaos... I dont believe in anything, but I believe in everything...
My way of thinking and seeing the world is never the same Pedro -.-
[email protected] siger:
Thats also why im not the same person as yesterday
-Pedro H- siger:
So I see.
-Pedro H- siger:
And to think that I sometimes think that my mind's chaotic.
-Pedro H- siger:
"Thats also why im not the same person as yesterday" Regarding that.... well... neither am I, no-one is the same person they were yesterday... but if I elaborated on why I tihnk that then I'd go into some half-scientific explanation
[email protected] siger:
Every second we die and every second we are born again
[email protected] siger:
Even a moment of silence changes us
[email protected] siger:
We are not the same, our memory, our personality is different
-Pedro H- siger:
Die, yes... born again? How so?
[email protected] siger:
Are you the same person as you were just a second ago as you read this?
[email protected] siger:
Even if the word has changed nothing, or even if it hasnt even changed your memory, you are now one second older
-Pedro H- siger:
Possibly, depends on what sense.
-Pedro H- siger:
Physical, biological? I'm not the same person I was a milisecond ago.
-Pedro H- siger:
In thought? Mind? I'm the same.
[email protected] siger:
So you can honestly say, the thought you have in your head now, is the same as a milisecond ago?
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
My main thought, is someone I'm thinking of, been thinking the whole day. But beneath that "main thought" there are countless others that I tihnk and stop thinking.
[email protected] siger:
So the main thought stay the same for you, dosnt change?
[email protected] siger:
How... Very... Interesting...
[email protected] siger:
My soul, my mind.... It is all liquid.. There is nothing constant there...
-Pedro H- siger:
Volatile, like quicksilver, huh?
-Pedro H- siger:
Not volatile, sorry... but changing.
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
Its like a buddhist school of thought, everything about you is liquid, the mind, the body, and the soul
[email protected] siger:
Nothing is constant, at all...
[email protected] siger:
What you see dosnt exist when you dont observe it...
-Pedro H- siger:
And when you do observe it?
[email protected] siger:
It exists, but only because you see it.. It dosnt REALLY exist, but the image exists, and the sensation of it being there exists...
[email protected] siger:
When you close your eyes, the sensation of it being there still exists, its texture still exist if you touch it, but the image does not-Pedro H- siger:
So it -does- exist when you don't observe it, unlike what you said.
-Pedro H- siger:
You just don't -see- it
[email protected] siger:
No, its the other way around
[email protected] siger:
It DOSNT exist when you observe it, but the sensation of it existing does
[email protected] siger:
Here is a green stick...
The green stick dosnt exist...
A picture, and a feeling of the stick, and of that it is green, exists
[email protected] siger:
But the stick itself, does not
[email protected] siger:
And once the feeling and picture is gone, it dosnt exist
-Pedro H- siger:
So
-Pedro H- siger:
The color exists,
-Pedro H- siger:
But the object, doesn't?
[email protected] siger:
The colour dosnt exist, your eyes reaction to believe they are seeing it does...
[email protected] siger:
Its like, what do you feel when you walk into a church?
[email protected] siger:
Well?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
Nothing, nothing at all. Most people say they feel happiness when they walk into a church, or come out of a mission or something. I don't feel diddly squat
-Pedro H- siger:
Sure, I feel the ground, the cold stone etc etc etc... but nothing else.
[email protected] siger:
What about walking into your own home?
-Pedro H- siger:
Hmm
-Pedro H- siger:
That too, nothing.
[email protected] siger:
Funny, you are possibly closer to understand this than any other people...
-Pedro H- siger:
Really?
-Pedro H- siger:
How so?
-Pedro H- siger:
I don't feel a thing, becauseI never stopped to think of it.
[email protected] siger:
When you look at "The wall"... That wall does nothing to you, the wall dosnt do so that you see it, it is you, who do it to yourself, you think you see the wall
-Pedro H- siger:
So it is entirely unrelated to his living self, to his life.
-Pedro H- siger:
Just to something he clings to.
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
So is what you see, and what you expirence
[email protected] siger:
All can be changed if you see it differently
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes, and no.
-Pedro H- siger:
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
-Pedro H- siger:
The wall is still the same, nothing changes, not even a single damn brick changes.
-Pedro H- siger:
People see different things, but that does not change what the thing they see is.
[email protected] siger:
Or do they?
[email protected] siger:
The thing dosnt exist
-Pedro H- siger:
In truth?
[email protected] siger:
Only what you see
-Pedro H- siger:
They think they do.
-Pedro H- siger:
But they only see, and feel what others want them to.
[email protected] siger:
You can never prove that the thing really exist, all you can prove is that YOU can see it
-Pedro H- siger:
E-heh...
[email protected] siger:
If others can see it to, you can never know if its the same thing
-Pedro H- siger:
If it didn't exist, then it wouldn't provoke such vastly different feelings in each person.
-Pedro H- siger:
They wouldn't feel a thing, just as I do, or rather, don't.
[email protected] siger:
Why wouldnt it?
[email protected] siger:
I told you, the feeling and the fact that it IS there exist, but it ISNT there
[email protected] siger:
Only the picture and feel of it
-Pedro H- siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
THe bed dosnt exist, the softness of the bed and the picture of a bed exists to you
-Pedro H- siger:
But the picture and feeling can't exist on their own, they are part of each other, and of something bigger, through which the picture, -and- the feelings are sent to whoever is near, if that bigger self didn't exist, then neither the picture, nor the feeling wouldn't exist to us, because they would never arrive to us.
-Pedro H- siger:
The wall, in this case, is the "bigger thing" that exist, through wich the feelings, and the picture, is sent.
-Pedro H- siger:
Perhaps the reality might be that its nothing more than a wooden stick in the middle of nowhere, but we see, and feel it, as if it were a church
[email protected] siger:
No its not.... It dosnt HAVE to be, you keep telling yourself, holding unto the belief that these things exist, and the only reason they do exist is because you NEED them to exist, you cant possibly think of a world where they dont
[email protected] siger:
Thats why you are so sure that they exist, thats why you defend it
-Pedro H- siger:
ACtually
-Pedro H- siger:
I did not defended that it exists
-Pedro H- siger:
It might be something, insignificant, that we see as something important to us.
-Pedro H- siger:
this
-Pedro H- siger:
thus*
-Pedro H- siger:
It exists...
-Pedro H- siger:
To us...
[email protected] siger:
Yes you do, actually... You keep telling that these things exist, you keep insisting upon that the wall exists... Even if, it dosnt.. It dosnt, if you are just willing, to one second, believe it does not exist, it dosnt...
[email protected] siger:
Try, try to think it dosnt exist...
-Pedro H- siger:
Are you saying that, if I think the wall doesn't exist, then it truly doesn't exist? Its an illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Yes
[email protected] siger:
But if you keep, insisting it does...
[email protected] siger:
You feed the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Ah! But therein lies the complication, how can one hope, to suddenly think, to suddenly believe, that something doesn't exist, when their whole lives, their whole existence, they've been taught that it does? Hmm?
[email protected] siger:
They cant, and thats why mad people get locked away
[email protected] siger:
They have seen the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Ah, but what if -we- are also nothing but an illusion? Hmm? That our bodies, minds, our very cells, are an illusion? How can an illusion, hope to break another illusion? And what if we believe that -we- are an illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Now you get it...
[email protected] siger:
The Illusion exists.. Because...
[email protected] siger:
We are illusions, the world we live in is a Illusion...
[email protected] siger:
The illusion feeds the illusion
-Pedro H- siger:
Then what is the truth behind all this illusion?
[email protected] siger:
When you find that, one truth... The one truth, the one thing which is true, without requiring us to exist, without requiring US, to make a meaning to it...
[email protected] siger:
I said it before...
[email protected] siger:
That is the meaning of life, that which exist without us having to make it exist
[email protected] siger:
That which is a illusion, before we make it into one
-Pedro H- siger:
Wish to know the most hopeless part of all this? " without requiring us to exist, without requiring US" We are incapable of even glimpsing at the hope of thinking of anything that does not require us to exist. We are incapable, of thinking of something that doesn't requrie us to exist.
-Pedro H- siger:
So
-Pedro H- siger:
Even though we know that we are nothing but illusions
[email protected] siger:
We depend on those
-Pedro H- siger:
We'll never hope to find the truth behind that illusion
[email protected] siger:
Indeed...
[email protected] siger:
Now you understand it...
[email protected] siger:
Now you understand it all..
-Pedro H- siger:
So why not accept the illusion?
[email protected] siger:
Yes, why not
-Pedro H- siger:
Heh, that leads to another truth.
-Pedro H- siger:
We never changed, you are the same person that you were secodns aog, or rather, the same illusion that you were, nothing changed... you only -think- that it changed.
-Pedro H- siger:
ago*
[email protected] siger:
Of course, but it didnt exist in the first place
[email protected] siger:
Neither did my statement
-Pedro H- siger:
Exactly
[email protected] siger:
Or this log someone is reading currently..
-Pedro H- siger:
That's why you never changed.
-Pedro H- siger:
To say that an illusion exists is completely incorrect, because an illusion is exactly something that does not exist, but we have no way of saying in such manner.
-Pedro H- siger:
What log? Eh?
-Pedro H- siger:
Someone?
[email protected] siger:
This convo is too interesting to just forget
-Pedro H- siger:
Hehehe... ditto.
[email protected] siger:
Thank you for the chat, it has been most enlightening
-Pedro H- siger:
No, thank -you-
--
Looking back I agree little, but saying exactly off why, would take far too long, and I have already taken too much of your time, I was interested to see how exactly you would find this log interesting, and if you have read this far, please do comment.
I do not care off typos or other faults, only viewpoints.
- Edin