Oregon Trail in the playground.

[Raiser Blade]

I decided (in a fit of nostalgia) to load up the old classic Oregon Trail to see if myself and a few select fellow playgrounders could brave the wild west.

Our party consisted of:

Raiser_B1ade-Doctor (Party Leader of course)
Haruki-Kun
Bor the Barbarian Monk (For emotional support)
Dr. Bath (Not the doctor ironically)
and, in the last position that almost always dies:
Almighty Salmon

Due to me being a doctor we had a veritable buttload of money to start with. As the carpenters and farmers were bitterly trying to decide which of their children to sell in exchange for one more set of clothing we gleefully cleared out the stock of oxen, food and spare parts. I tried to trade a pair of oxen for the rights to a firstborn child but sadly that was not an option.

Doctor Raiser, being concerned for our health, sets our pace and meals to their easiest setting and we're off!

May 1 We leave. Much crying is had amongst the population as our brave crew sets out.

May 2 I shoot some buffalo for kicks it's a good thing too we only started with 1900 pounds of it.

May 22 Haruki breaks his leg gathering buffalo chips for our fire. I set it with some old twine.

June 3 Dr. Bath gets the measles! I have the party rest for a few days while I find some more twine to treat him.

June 24 Haruki gets measles too! It's an epidemic! No amount of twine in the world can save him. Despite this we press on.

June 29 Dr. Bath recovers on his own. The others start to wonder about my overuse of twine. The word fetish is tossed around.

July 4-7 No water. We cast lots to see who will be donating their blood to the cause. Salmon loses.

July 10 We make it to Independence Rock.! We give out a double ration of meat to celebrate!

July 16 I get dysentary! Horrors! We take five days to nurse my wounds. Across the nation people mourn for the mighty have been lain low.
Salmon gets to be my personal assistant while I am sick.

July 25 As I suffer in my sickbed I somehow get a snakebite. Dr. Bath looks very innocent and whistles. Bor tells me stories to pass the time.

August 12 Salmon breaks his leg. Wagonmaster Raiser sets the pace to Strenuous to compensate. Who can run 200 miles faster? 12 Oxen or a crippled Salmon. Bets are made amongst the wagon trains. The odds were set at 50:1 in favor of the oxen.

August 14 Almighty Salmon catches up to us and breaks my leg in a fit of anger (brought on by heat stroke and exhaustion no doubt). We rest.

August 18 I get ANOTHER snakebite. I begin to suspect mutiny. Haruki graciously offers to drive the oxen onward while I am bedridden.

August 31 Haruki gets a snakebite. I designate Dr. Bath to snake hunting duties. He is allowed to use Salmon as bait if it comes down to it.

September 2 Bor gets cholera. Despite my advanced medical knowledge (and skill with twine) he doesn't seem to be getting better.

September 14 Salmon gets Typhoid. We quicken our pace and set our rations to meager in an attempt to quicken his recovery. Somehow he survives.

October 15 Because of all the resting we've been doing we're waaaaay behind schedule. Wagonmaster Raiser blames the quality of twine out here. Salmon gets dysentery but no one seems to notice.

October 24 In celebration of making it this far we have a buffalo killing celebration. Haruki mistakes Dr. Bath for a buffalo and shoots him in the leg. Salmon spends the rest of the day snickering at Dr. Bath.

October 31 On halloween Haruki gets a snakebite. Dr. Bath has a smug look on his face almost as if...

November 8-14 We have a couple of uneventful days. Haruki and I chat about the best uses for twine in a medical situation. Salmon and Bath are regulated to cow chip duty. Bor shoots some buffalo to keep our spirits up. (Gunfire makes me happy)

December 18 We FINALLY reach Oregon. Despite my best efforts...err, fortunately no one is dead.

It was a lot of fun and I may just do it again sometime.

[Volug]

Ho boy, Oregon trail:smalltongue:

It's been a long time since I've played it, if I can find the game I think I will.

[Tempest Fennac]

Here it is: http://www.virtualapple.org/oregontraildisk.html . I've played it a couple of times, and I managed to succeed with no fatalities once (I looked it up after a lolcat refered to it).

[Pwenet]

Ah, the memories.

Back in the day when teachers would use that game cause they thought video games were educational, but us students only tried to kill our parties as quickly as possible.

[Metal Head]

So many memories. Such a great game, but the modern generation doesn't know about it. Pity.

[The Vorpal Tribble]

Oh, I LOVED Oregon Trail. Was raised on the original with such bad graphics a rabbit was like 4 pixels. Later on then got the highly updated version where you actually had movies of the NPC's talking to you.... and that was still like a decade ago. Man.

[Dragonrider]

We have "Oregon Trail II"...when I was 11 I played it all the time. I always named my characters after people I liked in books, but half of them died, so I tried naming them all after villains: I was Melkor, and I think we had Shelob, Sauron, Voldemort, etc. They all survived and Melkor became governor of Oregon. :smallbiggrin: Life's little ironies....

Incidentally, in Oregon Trail II you can go through the town where I live right now. Tho' it was only a small trading outpost at the time.

(leaves you to wonder which small trading outpost is home to Dragonrider)


Edit: @Metal Head: I may be somewhat out of the mainstream, but I still count as "modern generation". :smalltongue: And my 10-year-old brother loves the game (he just loves to kill as many animals as possible though)

[Vonriel]

Man, the best part about those games were getting everyone killed off and leaving humorous tombstones, especially on the school computers. Sometimes, it would get to the point where you couldn't go longer than two or three days of travelling without seeing a single tombstone :smalltongue:

My epitaph was always, "I told you I was sick."

[bugsysservant]

I downloaded it onto my flashdrive and ran it at school. It screwed up the monitor settings and then promptly crashed. Now we have a computer at school with about 600*400 pixels, and 8 bit color which no one can fix because the admin blocked the controls. This happened months ago, and one has used the computer since then.

[Raistlin1040]

I can see it now. AMEN-style.

Raistlin, Magtok, Saurous, Moon Called and Vespe set out on the oregon trail. Magtok, the leader, is quickly killed by Saurous and Raistlin. Vespe mysteriously disappears soon after. While on the trail, a sword is found, and Saurous lies impaled upon it. Suspecting Raistlin, Moon Called kills him in his sleep. However, she catches Typhoid soon after, and without the medical skill of Magtok and Raistlin, she dies.

[Haruki-kun]

I can see it now. AMEN-style.

Raistlin, Magtok, Saurous, Moon Called and Vespe set out on the oregon trail. Magtok, the leader, is quickly killed by Saurous and Raistlin. Vespe mysteriously disappears soon after. While on the trail, a sword is found, and Saurous lies impaled upon it. Suspecting Raistlin, Moon Called kills him in his sleep. However, she catches Typhoid soon after, and without the medical skill of Magtok and Raistlin, she dies.

HALO-style:

Haruki, Salmon, Masato, and Bushranger.

Everyone dies, Haruki tries to fly away, but is killed by hunger. Haruki's last words:

I wish we'd thought this through.......

[North]

Thats awesome I was just thinking about oregon trail the other week. That game and number munchers. Classic.

[blackfox]

Love this game... Just beat it again, with a score of 2236 or something... fun. Of course, I was lazy and chose to be a banker from Boston or whatever.

What an amazing way to blow off English work.

[RTGoodman]

I've felt guilty for years that I was the cause of the sharp decline of pixelated Native Americans in the game. The reason? "You've killed 290312493 pounds of food. You can only carry 200 back to the wagon."

(Of course, I'm pretty sure there weren't any Native Americans to begin with, but I definitely spent most of my time just laying low the vast herds of buffalo and rabbits.)

[The Bushranger]

Raistlin/Haruki: :smallbiggrin: :smalltongue:

I loved playing Oregon Trail II! Haven't in years, though, not sure it'll even work on this computer I have now...

[averagejoe]

Ah, Oregon Trail. I remember that from the halcyon days of my youth. It was a game that proved conclusively that a group of people traveling through the wilderness can survive with nothing but bacon, pickles, and wild game to eat.

[Aramil Liadon]

Hey, I played that game! Back when video games were educational, probably 9-10 years ago now. I think I beat it once...

I thought Epsom Salts were the solution to every problem. Malaria? Epsom salts. Food poisoning? Epsom salts, 2 spoonfuls. Bullet wound? Pour Epsom salts over it. Out of gunpowder, no pickles? Don't worry, just eat Epsom salts!

[Dr. Bath]

What is this game? And why did I fail to get Salmon killed when using him as snake bait? Come on! I'm better than that! :smalltongue:

[Telonius]

I've felt guilty for years that I was the cause of the sharp decline of pixelated Native Americans in the game. The reason? "You've killed 290312493 pounds of food. You can only carry 200 back to the wagon."

(Of course, I'm pretty sure there weren't any Native Americans to begin with, but I definitely spent most of my time just laying low the vast herds of buffalo and rabbits.)

Oh, they were there. I think it was at Fort Bridger that you could hire an Indian to take you across the river. Incidentally, my wagon always overturned and two or three people drowned whenever I tried this. Treacherous pixellated game-Indians. :smallwink:

[RTGoodman]

Oh, they were there. I think it was at Fort Bridger that you could hire an Indian to take you across the river. Incidentally, my wagon always overturned and two or three people drowned whenever I tried this. Treacherous pixellated game-Indians. :smallwink:

Ah, yes, you could hire a guide. I'd forgotten about that. The other day when I played the version online, I didn't get that far, mostly because I refuse to waste time with that new-fangled "caulk the wagon" or "wait for better conditions" nonsense when my party got to rivers. Lost two party members and most of my supplies (just 12 bullets, some clothes, and like 100 pounds of food left) in the first river. Lost a third in the second river or something, I think, and then the rest died of starvation because I had neither money nor bullets nor food nor items to trade for bullets or food. :smallsigh:

[Venox]

Ahh, Oregon Trail...how I played you much in my youth. And how, shall we say, misguided my youth was those days. I remember at every store, I would skim over the list like so:

"Oxen? Nah. Spare clothing? Nope. Spare wagon parts? Don't think so! Extra food? Hmm...WAIT WHAT IS THAT SHINY THING OVER THERE!?

Bullets?! HELL YEAH BULLETS! WHOO! MOAR BULLETS PLZ! WEEEEE!"

...until I had used up my entire budget.

Granted every adventure would end in disaster, at least I had more than enough ammo to build a new wagon out of ammo boxes. :smallwink:

[azule74]

Ho boy, Oregon trail:smalltongue:

It's been a long time since I've played it, if I can find the game I think I will.

If you have a facebook page they have it on there. I loose a few hours a month to it.

[MisterSaturnine]

Where on facebook is it? I've looked, and tried the link Tempest Fennac gave, but no results. :smallfrown:

[SDF]

Is it possible to make it through that game without getting dysentery? No.

[Raiser Blade]

Is it possible to make it through that game without getting dysentery? No.


I know me and salmon both caught it.

[Icewalker]

This was one of the funniest things I've read in a long time.

Snakebite while bedridden...awesome.

Yeah, I tried booting up Oregon Trail 2 a little while ago...then realized there were a million little things it suggested I should buy, I didn't know anything about them, and I knew that everyone would die. Honestly. They do! It's ridiculous!

As can be seen in the first post, it's pretty ridiculous. :smallsigh:

Good times though, good times.


Also, I believe the Facebook group is "I tried to ford the river and my ****ing oxen died"

edit: er, was 'the' Oregon Trail facebook group...now there are like 50 with the same name.

[RTGoodman]

Where on facebook is it? I've looked, and tried the link Tempest Fennac gave, but no results. :smallfrown:

If you just search for it on Facebook, and then click "Applications," there are three results. I'm not sure which is correct (since I refuse to add more than a few applications), but I'm pretty sure I've seen people with the third one before (i.e., this one (http://www.facebook.com/apps/application.php?id=6815247637&ref=s)developed by "kickflip").

Also, I had trouble getting the one Tempest Fennac posted to work, too, but that could be my computer being dumb.

[Rogue 7]

I've always found that II was the best incarnation of the series. It gave you a lot more options, plenty of things to buy, and a lot of detail. The others? Not so much. Will be replaying now, I suppose.

[TheLogman]

I usually just set out with the worst food, fastest Oxen, no spares of anything, minimum Oxen, no Guns or Bullets, and hope I can get are as possible. Interestingly enough, I somehow survived on "Wild Berries" for about 2 months, and every time I tried to go over a river, I picked the way I was sure was wrong, and somehow made it though.

[Jimblee]

Oh, does that game bring back memories. I wish I could get that site to work

I heard its possible to get the whole way if you just load up on nothing but ox, and you just reach Oregon before you run out of food

[Vespe Ratavo]

Oregon Trail? O rly? Sounds like fun. The AMENites are going west everybody!

Our party consists of:

Vespe, the carpenter and party leader
Lord Magtok, along to act as a meat shield- er, co-leader thingy
Raistlin, so he can sing and stuff
Saurous, because we like to see him suffer
Moon Called, because we can

Warning: This is a LOOONG day by day description.
April 1st, 1848 Vespe, foolishly given control of the finances, buys 3 yokes of oxen, 1000 pounds of food, ten sets of clothes, 2 wheels, 2 axles, and 2 tongues, and 10 boxes of bullets. With $300 to spare, AMEN sets out.

Vespe looks at the map. Aw...boop! No one told me we were going all the way to Oregon!
The game is called OREGON TRAIL, where did you think we were going? Magtok slaps Vespe for being an idiot.

The wagon sets out, traveling at a strenuous pace, but eating filling rations.
Not to worry everyone, I brought plenty of food.
Have you thought about what we're going to do when the food runs out? Saurous asks.
I'm going to shoot stuff!
Brilliant.

April 5 The AMENites make it to the Kansas river crossing. Much oohing and aahing. Vespe and Raistlin caulk (heheh, he said caulk (http://www.cad-comic.com/comic.php?d=20030611)) the wagon and attempt to float it across. They make it across with no trouble.

April 6 Magtok gets fever. No one really cares.

April 9 AMEN makes it to the Big Blue river crossing. They stop to rest for 3 days, because they're lazy. Magtok's fever lets up a bit.

April 12 Vespe attempts to trade by holding up a sign that says "will dance 4 food." No one takes him up on it. Seeing as how it worked before, Vespe decides the only thing that will get them across the river is a lot of caulk. For once, he's right. MC giggles at the word "caulk."

April 15 Vespe pulls out his gun and starts hunting. He wastes some bullets, but doesn't hit anything.

April 16 Saurous tells everyone to wait a minute as he goes off to inspect something. He comes back saying he found an abandoned wagon with a set of clothing in it. He holds up said clothing, which is stained with blood. Everyone stares at Saur. What?

April 17 Raistlin gets typhoid.

April 18 Magtok says to stop when he sees a gravestone. He finds that it says "Here lies andy. peperony and chease"

April 21 AMEN reaches Fort Kearney. They rest a bit, and Raistlins condition improves. Vespe wastes two days trying to trade. Saurous, concerned about how much food they're wasting, starts making meager meals. (Yes, Saurous is the cook. No, that wasn't a very good idea in hindsight.)

April 26 The wagon leaves Fort Kearney. Everyone is disappointed at their smaller rations.

May 2 Saurous breaks his leg. Vespe, Raistlin, and Magtok laugh, but MC insists they rest at the next stop. Vespe agrees.

May 4 Moon Called goes missing. Everyone wastes 5 days looking for her.

May 9 They stop at Fort Whatever. They rest for three days.

May 12 Vespe trades a wagon tongue for 28 pounds of food. Everyone laughs at him.

May 14 The wagon reaches Chimney Rock. Vespe checks the map again, and is surprised to see that someone drew a line on it. An axle is traded for 27 pounds of food. Vespe is laughed at again, and curses his tendency to roll natural ones.

May 19 There is little water and grass. No one cares. Fort Laramie is reached, the AMENites pat themselves on the back and rest for two days.

May 26 Everyone is in poor health, and the wagons are stopped for six days.

June 3 MC, while out wandering, finds some wild fruit. She brings it back to the wagon.

June 5 Saurous gets dysentery from the fruit. Vespe, Raistlin, and Magtok laugh again.

June 7 Magtok gets cholera, stops laughing.

June 9 Wagon wheel breaks. Vespe attempts to repair it, but ends up driving the nail into his own hand. Saurous sighs and replaces it himself.

June 11 Independence Rock is reached! Everyone rejoices, and falls asleep for 6 days.

June 17 Noticing they're running out of food, Vespe attempts to trade for some. He trades an ox for 70 pounds of food. Saurous criticizes him, stating that they could have just killed the ox and gotten plenty of food.

June 19 After another failed attempt at trading, the AMENites set out once more.

June 22 Saurous, noting that the food is seriously starting to run out, cuts back rations even more. Everyone complains, and as a result walks very slowly.

June 24 Raistlin gets cholera.

June 26 Magtok gets a fever.

June 27 South Pass is reached. After some more failed attempts at trading, the AMENites rest for a week, then head towards Fort Bridger.

July 9 Magtok gets typhoid.

July 10 Magtok dies from all those diseases he got. He is buried, and the wagon moves on. Saurous brings back some "wild fruit" that looks suspiciously like meat. Vespe finds a cybernetic eye in the "wild fruit." :smalleek:

July 11 Vespe stabs one of the oxen.

July 13 Moon Called gets measles. Saurous insists they stop to rest. After 6 days of resting with no improvement, the wagon carries on.

July 23 Moon Called gets a fever. The wagon stops once more, for 2 days, with no improvement.

July 28 Fort NoOneReallyCaresAboutTheFreakingName is reached. Vespe gives in and trades 100 bullets for 50 pounds of food. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief. They rest for two days, and move on.

August 16 More "wild fruit" is found, rations improve slightly and are larger.

August 19 Soda Springs are reached, Vespe drinks from the springs, complains that it doesn't taste like soda.

August 25 Saurous gets dysentery.

August 27 Fort Hall is reached. Everyone is completely out of food. The words "mutiny" and "cannibalism" are tossed around a bit. Luckily, Raistlin steals all the money and buys food with it, thereby sparing Vespe imminent death.

August 28 One of the oxen dies.

August 30 Moon Called gets a fever.

September 6 More "wild fruit" found. The wagon stops and rests for six days. Health improves greatly.

September 13 Oxen injured, no one cares.

September 17 Vespe spies a road sign that says "Oregon is THAT WAY" and promptly turns the wagons. After going the wrong way for a while, Raistlin sighs and takes control of the wagons, telling Vespe to go play with the gun or something. 3 days are lost.

September 22 Saurous is exhausted for some reason.

September 23 Snake River Crossing reached. Vespe trades off some of Magtoks clothes for food, and 3 days are spent resting. The word "mind numbing boredom is tossed around."

September 27 The river is crossed. Caulk saves the day once more.

October 4 Saurous gets cholera.

October 7 The wagon tongue breaks. Vespe attempts to fix it, and actually manages to do it.

October 11 Fort Boise is reached. Much rejoicing, then 4 days of rest.

October 17 Raistlin inadvertently drives the wagons away from the trail. Vespe takes control of the wagons back.

October 26 Moon Called gets measles.

October 27 Trail is lost again, everyone fights over who runs the wagons, Saurous wins. Vespe takes control of cooking, and isn't bad, surprisingly.

October 29 Oxen dies.

October 30 A mob of trick-or-treaters descends upon the wagon, begging for candy. Vespe points out that it isn't Halloween yet, but it still takes a day to move the wagon through them all.

November 5 An abandoned wagon is found, with 3 sets of clothing, 1 wagon wheel, 2 wagon axles, and 3 wagon something elses.

November 8 Heavy fog and stuff.

November 11 Blue Mountains reached. Vespe looks at the map and rejoices that they're almost to Oregon. Raistlin proposes a party, and they do so, followed by resting for 6 days. AMEN sets out for Fort Walla Walla because it has a funny name.

November 22 Saurous gets confused and heads for Fort Willy Willy, losing two days.

November 27 Fort Walla Walla is reached. Vespe trades a wagon tongue for food, and they set out once more.

November 28 MC gets a fever.

December 1 Blizzard causes them all to waste a day playing World of Warcraft.

December 11 An impassible trail causes the AMENites to lose 10 days. Morale and food are low, but Vespe urges everyone to continue.

December 22 Moon Called dies. Saurous becomes even more depressed than he usually is. Vespe tries to hunt, but can't hit anything.

December 25 Saurous gets measles for Christmas. Luckily, helpful Indians help Raistlin and Vespe find food. Saurous dies from his measles.

December 27 The Dalles are reached. Vespe begs for what food he can, and the wagon floats down the Columbia river. Several rocks are hit, and both Raistlin and Vespe drown. The wagon slowly floats down the river...and hits Oregon without any of its occupants.

News of the failed AMEN expedition reaches AMEN members back in the east, who promptly throw a party.