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Lord
2008-02-09, 02:39 AM
Alright before I show you it I'm going to need to give you a bit of background.
This is from a custom setting. There are four gods. Winter, god of honor, justice warriors and his namesake, his season is desighned to keep the world from becoming soft from lack of danger. Summer, god of power, life, and the arcane and his namesake, his season is so that the races can become strong for when winter comes along. Fall, god of illusions, trickery, rogues, and his namesake, his season is so that the races will know when to prepare for winter. and finally spring god of healing, protection and his namesake. His season is so that the races of the world may know that summer is on the way, so that they would not lose hope.
Summer and spring are close friends, Winter and Fall are also friends, both sides mildly dislike eachother, but they realize that the whole natural order would collapse if they didn't work together. Oh and Summer and Winter, are the to dogs.

Anyway so here's my first custom class, the Warrior of Winter!!!

Warrior of Winter
BAB: +1 per level
Hit die: 1d10
Skill points per level: 4
Class skills: See fighter
Saves:
See fighter.

Description: These Warriors are the greatest fighters in the world. They usually worship the god Winter, probably being part of his Knights. Though some have been known to revere the cold itself.
Regardless of what faction they align with. The Warriors of winter are far superior to the combatants of the other seasons, this however comes with a price. From the age of ten the are set into a brutal training regiment. Those that fail often enough are given back to their families to take up a normal trade. Winter may be a god of justice, but he is also the keeper of the harshest season, one designed for keeping the people of the world from becoming weak from a life without challenge.
Those who succeed are trained in the art of war, and the concept of honor, for years. When they finally reach the age of 16 is they have done well enough are admitted formally into the ranks. Those who fail are sent to do standard military service so that they may keep some of their honor.
When a warrior of winter first begins his career he is little more than a fighter without bonus feats. However, they soon begin to gain mastery over the cold. Eventually the cold becomes like warmth from a fire. They can quite literally walk through snow storms like an ordinary man might walk across the room. Finally at the height of their power, they gain the ability to summon snow storms, hail storms, and other cold based weather, assuming winter decides to grant their request.
Class Features:
Weapon and armor proficiencies: The warrior of winter is proficient in all simple and martial weapons, all armor, and shields {including tower shields.}.

Chill touch: Starting at 1st level the warrior may once per day per 3 levels use this ability as if he was under the effects of chill touch.

Chilling strike: At 3rd level he Warrior may at will do an extra 1d6 cold damage per character level, to a maximum of 10d6 at tenth level. This ability can be used once per five Warrior levels.
Variant: Optionally at the DM’s discretion, the players may instead opt to gain a permanent 1d6 bonus to all damage rolls.

Spirit Breaker: Starting at 6th level, the Warrior finally masters the ancient power of Spirit breaker a technique passed down for centuries. Once per day, the warrior may opt to use the spirit breaker, this will cause his body and weapon to glow white, this gives the warrior a +4 to Strength, his speed is doubled, and he gains an extra attack. It lasts for a number of rounds equal to 3 plus his constitution score to a maximum of 5 rounds. At 15th level, his speed is tripled, and he gains a +6 to strength. At the end of his spirit breaker mode, he is fatigued until the end of the battle. He may opt to attempt to extend this power so that he goes beyond his physical limits. He may increase the time a bit, he must make a fortitude save DC 15+2 for each additional round. This however, is dangerous. Upon exiting the spirit breaker mode, he must immediately make a fortitude save DC 15+2 for each extra round, or die from pushing himself too far. Even if he succeeds he will immediately fall unconscious for an hour. Upon waking up he will be exhausted until he rests for an additional five minutes. His memories will be clouded from what happened during the battle.

Freeze joints: At 10th level the Warrior may once per day per fivel levels after 10th, he may shoot a beam with a range of 100 feet that freezes the targets joints. The warrior must make a ranged touch attack against the target. If the beam hit’s, the target must make a DC 15+ the warriors level+ the warriors CHA Fortitude save, if the save fails the targets joints are stiffened. This causes the target to move at half their normal speed and take a -4 penelty to attack rolls. Should the target attempt to cast a spell he will have to make a concentration check DC 15+ the Warriors level+ The warriors CHA. If the save succeeds the targets speed is normal, the attack penalty is -2, and only half the warriors level should be factored into the concentration check DC.

Essence of Cold: After ascending 15th level, the Warrior gains complete immunity to all forms of cold damage and effects. They are unafected by old whether in any way shape or form. Nothing short of divine intervention or the warrior willingly putting down the effect, will change this. Not even level drain can stop it, Winter has truly found favor in this individual and only at his will can it be taken away.

Power of Winter: This “ability” is not really something which is under the warriors control. Rather the warrior must request some sort of whether change that is based off of cold. Theoretically anyone could use this ability, Winter simply would not grant their prayer, the only difference between a 1st level warrior requesting a blizzard, and a 20th, level requesting a blizzard, is that the 20th level is certainly far more valuable to winter than the former. Note however that there is a chance, however slim, that in times of great need for the entire Winteran faith, then winter may grant the prayer.

Thoughts, opinions, any advice on how to balance it would be appreciated. Sorry about the bad organization I couldn't figure out how to make those graphs. I tried to make it capable of holding their own against spellcasters.

P.S. If I missed anything please tell me.

[edit]: The spirit breaker may seem a bit random, it has a long story behind it.

Zincorium
2008-02-09, 02:57 AM
I posted this in the other thread you made (the one that didn't actually contain any information:

homebrew section (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=15)

AKA stuff you've made and want people to critique. Not only will you seem like you actually know how the forum is arranged, but you'll get useful feedback from people who are used to giving such.

Hazkali
2008-02-09, 05:05 AM
*Yawn* Someone else who hasn't read the stickies at the top of the Homebrew forum. :smallsigh:

Okay, if you want people to take this seriously, you have some work to do.

First, go here (http://www.pifro.com/dnd) or to the aforementioned stickies to get the forum code for a 20-level table, and fill it in. It is not that difficult but makes it easier for everyone to judge the class.

Secondly, bold and italics exist for a reason. Use the former for the titles of your abilities on each paragraph to make them stand out, and then use the latter when referencing abilities or spells in the bulk of the text.

Thirdly, most of your abilities are missing action types and speeds- you will need to judge whether they are (Ex), (Su) or (Sp) abilities, and whether they take a free action, move action, standard action or longer to use.

Fourthly, you really need to give Power of Winter some rules. Perhaps linking it to the spell Control Weather. Something along the lines of:



Power of Winter (Sp): At 10th level, the Warrior of Winter gains the ability to request Winter to alter the weather. Once per day he may attempt to use the spell Control Weather (changing to cold weather only).

This ability has a 100-5% per level chance of failure (50% at 10th level, 45% at 11th level and so on). If the ability fails it is considered expended for that day.

This ability has a caster level equal to 13 or the number of levels the character has in Warrior of Winter, whichever is higher, and takes five minutes of uninterrupted prayer activate.

Hecore
2008-02-09, 05:20 AM
Also something to consider about the class is that you only get six abilities over 20 levels. That means 14 of your levels are entirely dead - if I were you I would consider retooling the class as a 5 or 10 level PRC.

Lord
2008-02-09, 08:02 AM
Well I guess I had better start fixing it. This may take a while.
Oh and the thread which didn't have any information was a dirict result of my browser being screwy, I though I xed out of it fast enough but I guess not.

Swooper
2008-02-09, 09:37 AM
The duration of the Spirit Breaker power seems screwy. If read literally, it will last for 5 rounds unless the user has a Con of exactly 1, then it lasts for 4 rounds. :smallconfused: You need to fix this.


These Warriors are the greatest fighters in the world.
Oh, and you might want to actually back this up. Right now, a regular fighter is much better (and fighters are generally regarded as underpowered).

Hazkali
2008-02-09, 12:43 PM
As written, the Spirit Breaker ability is less useful than a couple of well cast buff spells, and certainly less useful than Rage. Whilst I like the fact that you attempt to scale it, the 1/day limit is really low for such a poor ability. Check out the Divine Power spell; whilst it doesn't do everything that this ability does, it won't leave you fatigued or...

Wait a minute. Just, wait a minute. Does that say you can DIE from using this ability?

So this character might die from trying to extend this ability to a length of time comparable to an average buff spell? Please, when you modify this class, get rid of that bit first.

I'm sorry if I come over harsh, I sometimes forget that this is your first homebrew.