Report

[CommodoreFluffy]

Hey guys,
I need to write a report, on something interesting for my English class. Since it is English, and we are only writing to understand fluid paragraph format, and persuasive writing, I was wondering if you could give me a hand on what to write my report on. If you can, that would be great.

[Icewalker]

"...And that's why Firefly is so awesome."

[Amotis]

"...And that's why raiding the great red wyrm's nest is a bad idea."

[CommodoreFluffy]

HA...Ha...ha...Very Funny...I Meant Seriously.

[Serpentine]

"A funny thing happened on the way to the hobby store..."

A review of the Internet.

"Finland: Fact or Fiction? An expose of a centuries-long conspiracy."

"There once was a man from Nantucket..."

"Why Homework is for Chumps"

"Why This Assignment is Stupid"

"Why I'm Going to Ace This Assignment"

"My Cat's Breath Smells Like Catfood"

[Amotis]

"How William Shakespear met Bye Nye the Science Guy"

"Worst Case Scenario: Goldfish"

"Lampshades: What's All That About?"

"The Desolation Spoon of Immorality: How I Found Dinner"

"Micky Mouse: Nazi or Nazi? You Decided!"

"I once had a nice pair of socks but I found them missing one day, have you seen my socks?"

"Jim"

"I once had a nice pair of socks but I found them missing one day, have you seen my socks? II"

[Jagg]

"Why does everyone take the piss?"

"Why I was forced to write lines for the word Piss"

"Why I've learnt the phrase extracting urinary fluid rather than saying taking the piss"

"Why I'm sorry I can't stop saying taking the piss coz extracting the urine sounds so prissy."
....

Serious response

How about the language used in Nigerian Scam letters? They at least try and be persuasive and you can find lots of examples for source material and it will be interesting and unique.

JAGG

[North]

Right about what would happen if zombies attacked your english class. Make sure you devote lotsa paragraphs to gruesome demises. Im sure that would go over very well.

[Narmoth]

something that your teacher has at least a peripheral interest of reading about, since you write this for the teacher to read and give you a good grade on, and something you have at least a bit of knowledge about, as again , your teacher should think you have something interesting to say on the subject.

[Shademan]

write about the life of a average knight?
how USSR is planning to innvade Norway on a army of elephants!!!

[Narmoth]

actually, they did. in 1944 they invaded Finmark, the which is the northerness county in Norway.
But they didn't use elephants. Not even raindeers.

[Shademan]

HEY! youre norwegian too!!!

kor hænn i landet e det du hjømme dæ!? HAHA!

[Serpentine]

An exposé of the wild, rude and raunchy goings-on of your class, including the teacher! :smallbiggrin:

[Kaelaroth]

Hmmm..
- All gym/PE teachers are paedophiles: Discuss.
- What would happen if I acquired all powers of Superman?
- If we were locked in the school permanently, what events would transpire? e.g. what would be the authority, what happens when foo becomes scarce... etc.

[unstattedCommoner]

Why This Task Would Be Significantly Easier If You Would Just Assign A Topic.

[Narmoth]

HEY! youre norwegian too!!!

kor hænn i landet e det du hjømme dæ!? HAHA!

- translation for the understanding of norwegian language impaired:
"where in Norway are you from?" (obviously not word by word, but I translate the meaning of the sentence rather than litterally)

Tromsø

And where are you from?

[MandibleBones]

Why This Task Would Be Significantly Easier If You Would Just Assign A Topic.

This. Definitely this.

Also, "Why You'e Not Prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse - and Why You Should Be."

[Mauve Shirt]

"Why one should spend their free time at giantitp.com"

[Rare Pink Leech]

Why This Task Would Be Significantly Easier If You Would Just Assign A Topic.

I love this idea - if I had an assignment like this I would definitely do this one. It would be a great way for my sarcasm skills to shine :smallsmile:

To the OP: just talk about something that you're interested in, especially if it's something that not a lot of people know about. This has a several advantages: you'll be able to talk more passionately and persuasively about something you're interested in, which will obviously help you write it better; teachers tend to love reading/hearing about things they didn't know about (as long as it's interesting), which will make your teacher more receptive; and more importantly, you will enjoy the assignment.

The part about the teacher being more receptive is especially true - in high school I had a research project that we had to present to the class, and I talked about Medieval sieges - how to attack a castle and what type of defences castles had. Despite having only average presentation skills, I got one of the best marks in the class due to having a subject that few people knew about.

[Solo]

"How I convinced a bunch of forum goers to do my work for me."

[Eksar Lindisfar]

"the way of redemption of Frodo Baggins"

"Platonic influence in nowaday books"

"bored topics to choose for a report and why they're so boring"

[Bor the Barbarian Monk]

"A full understanding of why he is dead, Jim."

"Things I found under my fridge: an exposé."

"Why a tempered steel pen really is mightier than a sword."

"The truth about lying, and how it saved the relationship between me and my cat."

"The Great Sock Graveyard: what I discovered in the Congo."

"Three reasons I shouldn't ask people on GitP to help with my homework."

:smallbiggrin:

[Dallas-Dakota]

''The life of Tolkien''


Right about what would happen if zombies attacked your english class. Make sure you devote lotsa paragraphs to gruesome demises. Im sure that would go over very well.

I like this idea, though I already did it in my old english class one time becouse I was bored, but I didnt give it to the teacher.

[Shademan]

- translation for the understanding of norwegian language impaired:
"where in Norway are you from?" (obviously not word by word, but I translate the meaning of the sentence rather than litterally)

Tromsø

And where are you from?

HOLY ****! IM IN TROMSØ TOO!!!!

[Gaelbert]

*Readies serious answers*
Persuasive essays are always my favorite. Let's see if I can find some of my old topics.
*Ahem*
Socialism. This one is good because usually no one expects it.
Take something controversial, like stem cell research.
I've more to add later when I find my old collection.

[Serpentine]

Well, whatever you choose, it ought to include the word "expose" (stupid PCs, not having any way to put in accents :smallannoyed:).

[de-trick]

how to play the cowbell

If here we go out for Chinese do people from china go out for Finland food

The story of a fish who had a laser beam

[Ranna]

oooo why boys and girls cant just be friends - i find that particually easy to talk about

...oh wait, wrong thread

Oh relationship woes, here i come :smallwink:

[Metal Head]

Do something really sarcastic. Like proposing that we euthanize all people over 70 and recycle them into soap. Your teacher might not understand that you're joking though.

[CommodoreFluffy]

I actually did something like that, but it was fat people, and candles/tallow