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View Full Version : Adventurer In Love With A Bipolar Dragon-HELP!



Leliel
2008-02-16, 02:55 PM
Well, during my freinds Xorvintaal Exarch game, my PC (An NG Wereraven Wizard) has developed a mutual attraction to our mistress, a chipper young golden dragon. Good right? It is, except for one thing...

She's a Tsundere (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Tsundere). And not just any Tsundere either, but a Tsundere whose personality could be described as "Overcaffenated Katara from Avatar with paranoia and a teperment similar to that of Asuka Langley's". Yep, my character is wondering what he was thinking when he flirted with her.

So now, she has one of her dragon eyes following me at all times, making sure my Casanova tendancies (Lycanthropic instinct mandates that) are more in check then they need to be, and using Recall Exarch constantly. I am also living in fear of the day I have to use my Lair's Rebirth ability, since something tells me she'll have a nervous breakdown if she sees my unconscious body, and I don't think I'll be able to stand her overprotective blubbering. So...

How do I deal with this crazy lizard lady!?

And no, I will not accept "break up" as an option. Something tells me that there won't be enough left of me afterwards to "just be friends" afterwards.

The_Werebear
2008-02-16, 03:05 PM
See what the Half Dragon Wereraven Template looks like. While the dragon is looking over the youngsters (IE, DM is trying to calculate stats ) get some protection from Scrying. Thus, everyone is slightly happy, at least.

Attilargh
2008-02-16, 03:17 PM
Well, the easy solution would probably be to find another young tsundere dragon and arrange things so that they eventually fall in love. Having them meet cute (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MeetCute) should be a good start.

Alternatively, ditch your alignment and sell her off to some intrepid band of adventurers.

Or boost your Bluff, claim you're gay and hope she doesn't feel comfortable jumping the gender barrier (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/JumpingTheGenderBarrier).

UglyPanda
2008-02-16, 03:17 PM
Look up every bad boyfriend story in every women's magazine you can find and try to emulate those characteristics. Second-worst-case-scenario, you can fake your own death. Worst-case-scenario, buy 5000 gp worth of diamonds.

Reinboom
2008-02-16, 03:30 PM
Look up every bad boyfriend story in every women's magazine you can find and try to emulate those characteristics. Second-worst-case-scenario, you can fake your own death. Worst-case-scenario, buy 5000 gp worth of diamonds.

1,000 gp of diamonds.
Just need someone to get your body out of there quickly (teleport). Then revivify.
In 6 seconds.

Leliel
2008-02-16, 03:30 PM
Those would be great ideas...If my character was actually trying to get out of the relationship. Love makes you do crazy things after all. I'm actually looking for a way to survive her mood swings.

horseboy
2008-02-16, 03:41 PM
Find Lumpy, Exalted people named "John", feed them to her.

Rutee
2008-02-16, 04:43 PM
I'm sorry, not only am I not good enough at DnD to figure out a 'solution', no part of this situation doesn't scream AWESOME at me; I'd be looking to maximize hilarity, not save your character.

Edit: Oh! Then you're trying to keep it up, my bad. Try scrolls of Calm Emotions, for starters, and try to placate her when she's Tsun-Tsun.

Swiftblu
2008-02-16, 07:11 PM
Spike her drinks with potions of Calm Emotions and Charm Monster the hell out of her. You'll also want to cast a lot of Suggestions. Cast them on her in her sleep if you can, or Silent Spell it if you can't (no somatic component).

Get a Mind Blank or an Invisibility/Silence and her Dragon Eyes shouldn't know who you are. If that won't work, you can just Dispel Magic them. Still and Silent the Dispel if you can, so she has no idea it was you casting it. If she asks about it, Bluff her into thinking that there was just some magical interference. If all else fails, smash them (are Dragon Eyes physical?).

Azerian Kelimon
2008-02-16, 07:35 PM
I recommend buying a Helm of Serenity, or using a Reality Revision.

BTW, is this the werewolves-as-characters game we heard you talking about here? 'Cause if it is, it's a Big Damn Awesome game.

puppyavenger
2008-02-16, 07:53 PM
I recommend buying a Helm of Serenity, or using a Reality Revision.

BTW, is this the werewolves-as-characters game we heard you talking about here? 'Cause if it is, it's a Big Damn Awesome game.

indeed, how'd the Were-fox Darklord work out?

Faithdreamer
2008-02-17, 05:36 AM
This Dragon is so Cute! ^_^!

Be nice to her and listen to everything she says and be very patient and love her to death. She seems like a very young dragon and it will be very easy to break her heart with the littlest gesture.
Never ever start being a meanie and telling her to go away because you’ll break her heart in two; she’s never done anything to make you hate her and loves you beyond reason.

Leliel you should be flattered she cares about you so much. Show her that you care about her just as much with your humility and compassion and things will be nicer for you.

You do care about your Tsundere-chan Leliel..?

Tengu
2008-02-17, 05:48 AM
Bad news: you are in deep, deep ****e and there's no easy way out of it.
Good news: it's going to be hilarious for everyone apart from your character.

Really, this scenario is extremely amusing. Don't make anything that'll change the situation unless you are 100% sure OOCly that it will fail (preferably in a spectacularily hilarious manner).

Faithdreamer
2008-02-17, 06:03 AM
You're just a mean chaos demon Tengu what would you know? :smallamused:

You only make others pay the expense and laugh. This is not Comedic Leliel don't listen to a word he says.

horseboy
2008-02-17, 12:27 PM
You're just a mean chaos demon Tengu what would you know? :smallamused:

You only make others pay the expense and laugh. This is not Comedic Leliel don't listen to a word he says.
And that's different from a normal woman how? :smallwink:
There's a reason why men's side of conversations usually devolve down to "Uh, huh" "Yeah," "Yes, dear." "No it doesn't make you look fat." They don't care what you have to say, just that you're listening to what they say. Or your can fake it real well. :smallamused:

Leliel
2008-02-17, 12:59 PM
BTW, is this the werewolves-as-characters game we heard you talking about here? 'Cause if it is, it's a Big Damn Awesome game.

No, actually, it's a completely different game run by my buddy. I just wanted to play a wereraven.

holywhippet
2008-02-17, 05:15 PM
Use a simulacrum spell to create a duplicate of yourself and let her see it die. Enchant an item to permanently alter your appearance so she never finds out - or turn up at your "twin brothers" funeral.

Faithdreamer
2008-02-17, 07:17 PM
Pardons, you were saying?

I was so busy trying to find the fire extinguisher I couldn't hear your voice over the roaring flames. :smallsigh:

Nerd-o-rama
2008-02-17, 08:24 PM
Let me just say, as a man who is fascinated by crazy fictional women, that I love your description of Miss Copper.

Honestly, the way I (and most of my Good characters) would handle it is attempt to sit down and talk out your concerns about the relationship in a calm and mature fashion. Of course, I've never dated a woman who could eat me whole, so you may want to consider doing this from inside a Resilient Sphere or something. (Whatever you do, do not try this method over Sending spells or any other long-distance communication).

Then again, if she's really as bad as you say, I would run far, far, far away, and maybe sic some Dai Li and Mass Produced Evas on her just to be safe.

Faithdreamer
2008-02-18, 09:50 AM
I was all ears, boxie. Until you got over the talking part. Is there a way you can make it up?

Talk nerdy to me.

Fishy
2008-02-18, 10:49 AM
So now, she has one of her dragon eyes following my character at all times, making sure his Casanova tendancies (Lycanthropic instinct mandates that) are more in check then they need to be, and using Recall Exarch constantly. He is also living in fear of the day he has to use his Lair's Rebirth ability, since something tells me she'll have a nervous breakdown if she sees his unconscious body, and I don't think he'll be able to stand her overprotective blubbering.

Fixed. :P

You're right, this is a terrible situation for your character to be in, but it's also hilarious. You could play it up, even: Have your character 'forget' about the dragon eyes to while flirting with the Librarian, (Or wherever it is Wizards pick up girls). Receive your beatings, whine all the while that "It's not like that: she's not like you, baby!", make up, repeat.

Because abusive relationships are Comedy Gold. :/

KoboldMight
2008-02-18, 11:03 AM
well, you have gotten yourself into a quite unique stiuation. I'd advise you to seek some source of fire protection and then attempt what you peices of biomass call "compassionate conversation" while getting the message around that its not right to scry on people. either way the resulting fire works will be fun for all to watch (except you)
or kill her if it realLy REALLY comes to that (hope it doesn't)