PDA

View Full Version : Warhammer 40K Character Idea: Messiah of Tzeentch, and Everyone Else



Leliel
2008-04-22, 07:53 PM
Anyway, I once posted a essay on these boards entitled "Why I Would Worship Tzeentch If He Were Real", in which I entitled all the generally good and heroic things I could do with powers granted by the Raven God. Of course, this left out the question if he would allow me to do good things with them, but I justified it by thinking that inevitably, he would find some use for me in one of his ridiculously convoluted schemes.

Of course, this can't exactly be left OOC now can it? So, using my scheming imagination, decided to create a character based on this opinion.

Basically, he was originally a stout young Imperial officer with ideals a bit too much on the "idealistic" side for the universe he lives in, and as a result, started to doubt the more morally gray-ie, all-orders of his superiors. After the ship he was on got caught in a Warp Storm, he had the "fortune" of the first daemon he encountered being a relatively benign one made from the emotion of doubt, who seeking a new recruit of Tzeentch, decided to tell him about the true history of the Imperium and Chaos. As you might have already guessed, his emotions toward his superiors turned to rage, and he gleefully accepted the chance to spread a bit of Tzeentch's hope, in the (accurate) thought that using daemons to do was certainly as good or better than the Imperium's slow, ungainly, theocratic, and generally dystopic way of doing things. Today, he's become a fairly successful strategist and sorcerer for the Thousand Sons, and is looking to become a daemon prince. Classic "Fallen Hero" story, right?

Wrong. Although he's certainly fallen, he is far from forsaking his heroic side. He concocts plans that try to save as many civilians as possible, no matter their allegiance or creed. His sorcerer powers are often used to create beneficial mutations to crops to help them grow and become more nutricious and filling to it's consumers (and if they cause mutations themselves, all the better). The Grey Knights themselves note that the uncorrupted citizens in his domains are geniunely happier than when the Imperium rules them, although they of course chalk this up to eloborate slight of hand. He even tries to convert his comrades to his humanitarian way of thinking, though this almost never works.

Of course, he isn't delusional about his relationship to his master. Altough he geniunely belives the Chaos Gods are good as well as evil, he knows that ultimately, he is just a powerful pawn in Tzeentch's game. That won't stop him from using Chaos to help as many people as he can.

So, is this a good idea of somone to RP in a game
?

Tengu
2008-04-22, 08:33 PM
If this is for a RP game (the new WH40K RPG whose name escapes my mind at the moment, perhaps?), then you've got the wrong forum. You can use Gaming (d20 and General RPG) for non-DND games too.

Great concept, by the way. Very Faustian. Hard to play in a party of Imperium loyals, though.

Talkkno
2008-04-22, 08:58 PM
If this is for a RP game (the new WH40K RPG whose name escapes my mind at the moment, perhaps?),

Dark Hersey.

Belteshazzar
2008-04-22, 10:39 PM
"Weirdboy Thundaboot Eeerrh--- Da problemudik ting bout goin wiff Tzeena.. Tzzuza ...Txzu ... Da Boid-Head Fella Iz wat e izz alluz keepen fum youz Boiz...

I meen shur e be tellz you tingz and changez bad tingz up fer gud unz...But wen e startz doin Iz ting e dont liek stoppen da changz... Iuz once eard dat iz planz iz only bout changen... Peaze den Waaarrgg den Peaze Den Warrrrg, und not alluz afta oun anudar like yud be expekten.

Mean, sur Iz wan it be Warrgz when itz peaze but he alzo wan it be peaze when it WWWAAAAAARRRRGGGZ. And uz boiz don liek eit roitly. I meen why allua changen? Allua Toim. Den ow you knowen woitz up en down, gud er ... noit gud? Loik e saiz izelf "Itz All Acurden ta plann.." But iz hiz plan noit youz, not mien, not da Warbozz, err da Empura or even dat sneky Ellerad fella, see?

graymachine
2008-04-22, 11:10 PM
I think it's great and you could make an amazing character if you put the right shine of crazy on him too. Are you planning on actually playing him in an Emperor-fearing party? The IC/OCC friction would probably have the cleverness of the character overshadowed by frequent in-fighting, at least in the minds of your companions. I don't think it would go over well either with an all Chaos party, Khorne worshipers being what they are and all.

graymachine
2008-04-22, 11:12 PM
Dark Hersey.

Dark Heresy is actually being discontinued, I think. There is a new system being published for WH40K that should launch in the next few months.

Solo
2008-04-22, 11:31 PM
Foul heretic!

You foolishly bargain with the Ruinous Powers to achieve ends that you deem beneficial, yet you know as well as I that in the end, the harm of your actions will far outweigh any good you may have done, for such is the nature of Chaos!

Your thrice dammed carcase will weep in pain and torment inflicted on you by your capricious Warp God, making the thousands upon thousands of agonizing tortures the foul Dark Eldar have ever devised seem like naught but the effort of children feebly imitating the true masters of the art.

Yet beyond any kind of pain that shall ever be inflicted on your body will be the mental anguish inflicted upon your spirit, the torment of knowing that, though you tried to use your doubly cursed warp spawned power for good, all your efforts were in vain, for you are just an insignificant pawn in a game to ensure the demise of the Imperium and the fall of Mankind, and the only moves your puppetmaster will allow you to make are the ones that ultimately benefit it, not you.

Such is the fate of all who stray from the ways of the Emperor! I pray that you have enough sense to renounce your heretical ways and end your miserable life in a suitably expedient manner, for neither your masters nor I will grant you a pleasurable demise.


Have faith, comrads, and remain steady in your devotion to the Emperor! Only the solidarity of our faith in Him and the Imperium will bind us together and see us through the Night!

For without the Emperor, we would be nothing but a wandering blind herd grasping in the darkness, exposed to the evils of the universe.

Though the fight for humanity shall be long and difficult, we shall see it through to the end!

For just as the Emperor has adored everyone of us and sacrificed himself for mankind, so shall we plunge ourselves into the darkness and defend the Imperium of Man against the mutant, the heretic and the alien.

Shall I remind you of the tenet of Faith?

It is to venerate the Immortal Emperor, for without Him we are nothing!

Shall I remind you of the duty of all humans?

It is to to defend the Empire of Man, to purge the Unclean and the Heretic, the Mutant and the Alien!

Shall I remind you of the failure to do so?

It is everlasting torment and damnation, for such is the price of the traitor!

All praise be to the Emperor, master of Mankind by the will of the gods, master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies!

All glory be to the Imperium of Man! Beset on all sides by enemies, besieged from without by demons and xenos, attacked from within by heretics and rebels, for ten thousand years it has endured!

All exaltations be to the bravery of the Imperial Guard, the might of the Adeptus Astartes, the ever vigilant Inquisition, and the countless Planetary Defense Forces, without which the Imperium would have long ago fallen to the heretic, mutant, and alien.

Praise the Emperor!

Tola
2008-04-23, 01:42 AM
Well, that about says it.

Orks disapprove, the Imperium is all over you....what next?

The Eldar?

hanzo66
2008-04-23, 02:50 AM
The Tau: Who the hell is Tzeench? Oh, one of those Chaos gods? We're out. You go and get yourselves killed with that warp-thing you other races seem so fond of. Let's go enlighten some other guys by shooting the crap out of them.

Leliel
2008-04-23, 02:57 PM
Foul heretic!

Wha...? Oh. A Gray Knight. How charming.:smallsigh:

You foolishly bargain with the Ruinous Powers to achieve ends that you deem beneficial, yet you know as well as I that in the end, the harm of your actions will far outweigh any good you may have done, for such is the nature of Chaos!

Probably. But most of that harm will be done to the Ecclesiarchy and their ilk, which is fine by me.

Your thrice dammed carcase will weep in pain and torment inflicted on you by your capricious Warp God, making the thousands upon thousands of agonizing tortures the foul Dark Eldar have ever devised seem like naught but the effort of children feebly imitating the true masters of the art.

Certainly. Given that many of such tortures will be in the process of giving me superpowers, I'm fine with that also.

Yet beyond any kind of pain that shall ever be inflicted on your body will be the mental anguish inflicted upon your spirit, the torment of knowing that, though you tried to use your doubly cursed warp spawned power for good, all your efforts were in vain, for you are just an insignificant pawn in a game to ensure the demise of the Imperium and the fall of Mankind, and the only moves your puppetmaster will allow you to make are the ones that ultimately benefit it, not you.

I already am. But before you go on, ask yourself this: Why should my god wish the fall of Mankind, or even the Imperium? The former provides all their needs and food, and the Imperium even more so. It is corrupt, it is in a constant state of war, it is proud, it is in a constant state of flux...Perhaps my gods wish not for the death of Man and it's so-called Protectors, but it's continuation?

Such is the fate of all who stray from the ways of the Emperor! I pray that you have enough sense to renounce your heretical ways and end your miserable life in a suitably expedient manner, for neither your masters nor I will grant you a pleasurable demise.

Is there such a thing?

Have faith, comrades, and remain steady in your devotion to the Emperor! Only the solidarity of our faith in Him and the Imperium will bind us together and see us through the Night!

Oh, grand, now he's ranting. Have faith my friends, this will be over relatively soon...

For without the Emperor, we would be nothing but a wandering blind herd grasping in the darkness, exposed to the evils of the universe.

Not counting everything proceeding up and during the Dark Age of Technology, the Imperium today, Gue'versa...

Though the fight for humanity shall be long and difficult, we shall see it through to the end!

Gods, I hope not. I don't think I can stand another minute with you.

For just as the Emperor has adored everyone of us and sacrificed himself for mankind, so shall we plunge ourselves into the darkness and defend the Imperium of Man against the mutant, the heretic and the alien.

Please ignore the mutants with no connection to Chaos, the heretics who are just rebelling against a corrupt society, and the aliens that would leave us alone if we did the same to them...

Shall I remind you of the tenet of Faith?

Yes, why don't you? I forget everything drilled into us at the Imperial Navy every two minutes.

It is to venerate the Immortal Emperor, for without Him we are nothing!

Despite the fact that said Emperor was shortsighted, overly sentimental, and did not wish to be worshiped at all...

Shall I remind you of the duty of all humans?

Oh yes, I forgot how to read the writing drawn in every conceivable area too...

It is to to defend the Empire of Man, to purge the Unclean and the Heretic, the Mutant and the Alien!

See above comment on mutants, heretics, and aliens, adding that "skeptics who helped us get to this level of technology" count as "Unclean" in many belief systems too...

Shall I remind you of the failure to do so?

Why not, I also failed "Law for 2-year-olds"...

It is everlasting torment and damnation, for such is the price of the traitor!

And so is working for the Imperium.

All praise be to the Emperor, master of Mankind by the will of the gods, master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies!

Who are overstretched by about that many worlds worlds as well!

All glory be to the Imperium of Man! Beset on all sides by enemies, besieged from without by demons and xenos, attacked from within by heretics and rebels, for ten thousand years it has endured!

Due to it's enormous size, and nothing else!

All exaltations be to the bravery of the Imperial Guard, the might of the Adeptus Astartes, the ever vigilant Inquisition, and the countless Planetary Defense Forces, without which the Imperium would have long ago fallen to the heretic, mutant, and alien.

I...grant you that.

Praise the Emperor!

Who may be personally responsible for why the Thousand Sons are on my side, and not yours!



Hypocritical drivel, as usual. Get him boys.

To the Orks: Next time you criticize me, try to do it i a format I can read?

To the Tau: Tzeentch, for your information, is the personification of all hope and ambition in the universe, and as such, feeds on it.

He finds your dreams of an empire most tasty.:smallbiggrin:

PS: And could you stop shooting people indiscriminately? It makes my job of protecting civillians that much harder.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 03:29 PM
Insufficient levels of Grimdark detected. Make it so that his dealings are inadvertently slaughtering billions of people on the other side of the galaxy ('just as planned', say Tzeentch).

Alternatively, make him a corrupt, self-deluded demon prince who's convinced himself that he is doing good, humanitarian work, saving lives, forging a bright, happy future for his people, and spreading a new age of peace and prosperity, but Tzeentch is actually blinding him to the fact that he is massacring hundreds of thousands, brutally crushing humans underfoot, and bringing about the end times for those under his purview - after all, his zealotry is useful, even if he thinks he's using it against you.

Sorta like Oedipus, but having made a Faustian pact to root out the evil in Thebes - unaware of the fact that it's him.

I'm shelving this idea for a later Inquisitor Campaign, actually.

SurlySeraph
2008-04-23, 03:31 PM
Yes, this is a very good idea. This character would certainly be good-aligned, and very admirable. I have full respect for his actions and his intentions, though I personally disagree with the way he has gone about them.

Also, Inquisitor Solo and I are intimately versed in the Good Cop-Bad Cop technique.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-23, 03:40 PM
Solo, you don't post on the Inquisitor forum 'the conclave' do you?

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 03:43 PM
Solo, you don't post on the Inquisitor forum 'the conclave' do you?

Is the Conclave still alive even?

Arkhan - good times. Also, ridiculously complex rules ftw.

Rutee
2008-04-23, 03:47 PM
Insufficient levels of Grimdark detected.
DArk Heresy has very little grimdark. Mostly just dark humor :smallbiggrin:

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 03:48 PM
DArk Heresy has very little grimdark. Mostly just dark humor :smallbiggrin:

Dark Heresy is but a pale pretender to the awesome that was Inquisitor.

The awesome stabbed in the back by GW, though. :smallfurious:

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-23, 03:48 PM
It is. The GW sponsored site got shut down, but they've moved to a fan-run forum.

Even though the boards are pretty dead, and the Inquisitor system is massively flawed (complex, wierdly broken and completely unrealistic rules ftw indeed), I still think it's one of the best places to go for WH40K information.

Edit: As a side note, if you can still stomach playing Inquisitor, Dark Heresy does tons to enhance it.

Hectonkhyres
2008-04-23, 03:51 PM
And from the peanut gallery: 'OM NOM NOM NOM NOM.'

Rutee
2008-04-23, 03:54 PM
Dark Heresy is but a pale pretender to the awesome that was Inquisitor.

If Inquisitor was as Grimdark as normal 40k material, I'll have to say DH was better. Nothing worse then taking yourself seriously when you produce material that's absurd :P

Bryn
2008-04-23, 03:56 PM
...Seems like I got mega-simued by at least four people, and somebody already got in the Tyranid joke. Well, damn. Don't mind me!


Fool! Through your foolish ingorance in accepting the ruinous powers, you have damned us all! These ridiculous notions of saving people are the rantings of a madman! Through your heresy, you have opened the door for the denizens of the warp. Cities, planets, star systems... all will fall as a result your folly.

In the name of the Emperor, I hereby declare thee Extremis Diabolus, and consign you to the Warp.

/exterminatus. :smallamused:


Anyway, while a reasonable character idea in general, it doesn't really fit in the 40k universe... at least, as I would see it; it is, of course, subjective.

After trying forever to explain exactly why in a reasonably humorous manner, though, I have been beaten to the punch by Illiterate Scribe, who explains more eloquently and gives better ideas than I could have.

Final edit: extra stuff has been removed.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 04:09 PM
If Inquisitor was as Grimdark as normal 40k material, I'll have to say DH was better. Nothing worse then taking yourself seriously when you produce material that's absurd :P

Not at all. I'd say that, in the world where the story-designers actively seek out sympathetic characters and make them really, really, evil, it's self-parody.

Rutee
2008-04-23, 04:20 PM
I guess it really just depends on execution, that. You could pull it off either way, certainly

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 04:36 PM
I guess it really just depends on execution, that. You could pull it off either way, certainly

/tg/'s 'Bleakdim' campaign setting has it covered the right way, methinks.
(http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1014114/#1014437)
NentirelySFW.

And I quote:



Banners should be held up by spikes erupting from skulls, skulls which are attached to spikes on the armour. And those banners should have pictures of spiky skulls on them, possibly also holding up banners.

...

Addendum, the perpetual cloud cover is the result of several massive volcanoes. They also have the side effect of poisoning the air so that everyone who lives there is dying slowly and painfully. If the violence doesn't get you, you'll cough your lungs out before you turn 35.

Eita
2008-04-23, 04:38 PM
Foolish traitor! You have left the the Emperor's Light and have damned yourself and your flock to the mercies of a Dark God! When the Architect of Fate is done with you your very soul shall be scattered to the winds! Death will be but a fleeting dream in that dark place as Tzeentch tortures every fiber of your being. Your only solace will be the memories of the Almighty God-Emperor and how you abandoned him!

Then as the Thousand Sons reveal themselves to be the wolves they are they shall descend upon your worlds and destroy the sheep that live there in false security.

Know this Fallen One, the Gods of Chaos know no reason. They seek to destroy all Mankind, even if it means the very end of their existence. It is heretics like you who flirted with notions of allying or conquering with Daemons who brought the very fall of the Emperor Himself! Magnus the One-Eyed used sorcery most foul to cloud the visions of Guider of Man and hide the Treachery of Horus.

The wails of millions shall fill the streets of every world loyal to the Emperor as you go forth on your plans for "good". Unbeknown to you the Changer of Ways shall change all under your sway and brand unto them his Mark. A fate worse then death awaits, but such is the Emperor that He will seek to save them from the Dark One's grasp.

A thousand bells will toll with day of your fall as on angel's wings a heavenly sword of divine might pierces your black heart. The wings and weapons of the Adeptus Astartes shall be your downfall and the Holy Bolter shall be their sword! With fire and flame they shall cleanse the dark places that languished so under your shadow.

Maidens shall weep as the last of the true horrors you have brought come to life and the few lucky enough to survive them put to death. Such is the fate for all who near such evil, and fortunate are they. For if they are still pure of heart they shall enter the Emperor's Embrace. Then as your shadow lifts a heavenly choir shall sing as those worlds reenter the Fold of the Imperium.

Death to the Heretics! Purge the Unclean! Execute the Traitors! Annihilate the Xenos!

Long live the Emperor and His Mighty Imperium of Man!

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-23, 04:44 PM
Foolish traitor! You have left the the Emperor's Light and have damned yourself and your flock to the mercies of a Dark God! When the Architect of Fate is done with you your very soul shall be scattered to the winds! Death will be but a fleeting dream in that dark place as Tzeentch tortures every fiber of your being. Your only solace will be the memories of the Almighty God-Emperor and how you abandoned him!

Then as the Thousand Sons reveal themselves to be the wolves they are they shall descend upon your worlds and destroy the sheep that live there in false security.

Know this Fallen One, the Gods of Chaos know no reason. They seek to destroy all Mankind, even if it means the very end of their existence. It is heretics like you who flirted with notions of allying or conquering with Daemons who brought the very fall of the Emperor Himself! Magnus the One-Eyed used sorcery most foul to cloud the visions of Guider of Man and hide the Treachery of Horus.

The wails of millions shall fill the streets of every world loyal to the Emperor as you go forth on your plans for "good". Unbeknown to you the Changer of Ways shall change all under your sway and brand unto them his Mark. A fate worse then death awaits, but such is the Emperor that He will seek to save them from the Dark One's grasp.

A thousand bells will toll with day of your fall as on angel's wings a heavenly sword of divine might pierces your black heart. The wings and weapons of the Adeptus Astartes shall be your downfall and the Holy Bolter shall be their sword! With fire and flame they shall cleanse the dark places that languished so under your shadow.

Maidens shall weep as the last of the true horrors you have brought come to life and the few lucky enough to survive them put to death. Such is the fate for all who near such evil, and fortunate are they. For if they are still pure of heart they shall the Emperor's Embrace. Then as your shadow lifts a heavenly shall sing as those worlds reenter the Fold of the Imperium.

Death to the Heretics! Purge the Unclean! Execute the Traitors! Annihilate the Xenos!

Long live the Emperor and His Mighty Imperium of Man!

No, Eita, you are the Daemons. Illiterate Scribe crackered.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-23, 04:50 PM
And the daemons are also your father.

Inhuman Bot
2008-04-23, 09:28 PM
I'am a god of chaos and I still don't get it.

Belteshazzar
2008-04-24, 12:44 AM
Wots dis den Slannesh, owd e get in earh? See wot I meen wen you Chaos Boiz start wid day Chaosing it drawz aw dem udder chaos tings to yah? Loik wotchu'callum uhhh moths to da loit.

Und Papa Nugal gunna be pissed und roit ungrateful when e foinds out boit dis. Den da big rotted boiz gunna come en und den Da Hornned Angry Fellas gunna come fur some crumpen den da pink fella girly fella gunna show up und all hell und warppen tings gunna happen at once.

Den Da Marines gunna show up und ... eah know wot keep doing your ting dis sound loik a roit gud Warrrrgg so I be marken dis hear callunda paper here und we see you boiz in uhh two months.
-Calls offscreen "Ehh Boss we got a gud fight for ya so put down deem blue shooty fellas und lets get sum Roks und Boiz for a gud WAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGG!!!!!" Message fades into static and confused Tau fleet chatter-

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-24, 05:18 AM
I've said it before, I'll say it again. Even if they're forces of pure malevolance, whom are dedicated to the suffering and annihilation of humanity, the Chaos Gods still seems like the lesser evil compared to the Imperium.

Remember, change is good! If you aren't doing something new right now, you're doing it wrong!

Hoggmaster
2008-04-24, 06:36 AM
Dark Heresy is actually being discontinued, I think. There is a new system being published for WH40K that should launch in the next few months.

Its not going to be a new system, Fantasy Flight picked up the license and will produce it instead of GW.

Eita
2008-04-24, 06:44 AM
Wots dis den Slannesh, owd e get in earh? See wot I meen wen you Chaos Boiz start wid day Chaosing it drawz aw dem udder chaos tings to yah? Loik wotchu'callum uhhh moths to da loit.

Und Papa Nugal gunna be pissed und roit ungrateful when e foinds out boit dis. Den da big rotted boiz gunna come en und den Da Hornned Angry Fellas gunna come fur some crumpen den da pink fella girly fella gunna show up und all hell und warppen tings gunna happen at once.

Den Da Marines gunna show up und ... eah know wot keep doing your ting dis sound loik a roit gud Warrrrgg so I be marken dis hear callunda paper here und we see you boiz in uhh two months.
-Calls offscreen "Ehh Boss we got a gud fight for ya so put down deem blue shooty fellas und lets get sum Roks und Boiz for a gud WAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGG!!!!!" Message fades into static and confused Tau fleet chatter-

No. Just no.

It's WAAAAAAAGH!, not "WARG!". A warg is demon-wolf thing in Lord of the Rings.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-24, 06:45 AM
Hmmm... Orks are one thing that could do with getting a bit more GRIMDARK. They work better as bestial monsters rather than the comic relief.

Ahiman
2008-04-24, 09:04 AM
As a follower of Tzeentch I have to say...

Welcome to team winning everything.

But really, it just looks like you are doing good, you will see in time that everything you do is evil and that this is the way of power and greatness. Come all ye faithful to the temple of change and become more then you are.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 12:09 PM
I have a message from some ruffians outside the debate hall. I can't really read it though, the red ink they used is running. I believe it says.

KIILL MAIM BURN! KILL! MAIM! BURN! KILL! MAIM! BURN!

Whatever that means.

I also like the character. Though he would create an awkward situation should he manage to convert a Grey Knight or two to his side. Which would be badass. Of course, they would be forgotten, called heretics, and stricken from the recourd, but hey! Whaddyagonna do about it?

Make him actually serve Slaanesh though, who ended up making everything work out well by directly making everyone LOVE breathing. They would take a breath, shudder, and then smile really creepily.

Ewww. Bad thoughts! BAD THOUGHTS!

Bryn
2008-04-24, 12:19 PM
Though he would create an awkward situation should he manage to convert a Grey Knight or two to his side.

That would be very impressive indeed, considering that that would be the first Grey Knight ever to fall to Chaos. At least, IIRC.

Oh yes. Apologies for prior fail post, of fail. When I said what I said everyone else had said what I was about to have said so I only said things that were already said and the things that weren't said when I started were said by the time I finished having said what I said. Hope that makes up for it.

Said.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 12:50 PM
I[QUOTE=Sharikov;4237726]Hmmm... Orks are one thing that could do with getting a bit more GRIMDARK. They work better as bestial monsters rather than the comic relief.


Yeah - while I love the 'we are in fact the ultimate weapon against Chaos, pinnacle of the perfection of the Old Ones' creation' angle, expect the next Codex/backstory for them to make them much more evil. Sorry, but they're just too likeable at the moment. They even negotiate (albeit unreliably), for goodness' sake.

DanielX
2008-04-24, 01:05 PM
I was raised on a backwards planet on the very edge of the galaxy that nobody ever heard of, but I'd like to raise a point here:

Since it is pretty much established that the daemons and spirits are more or less reflections of the emotions and actions of the intelligent peoples of this galaxy, and bad things like rape or murder will inevitably provide food for Slaanesh or Nurgle or other chaos gods, then why not.... do and think good things? If there are good spirits, then they will be drawn by good emotions and good acts. Even 'evil' spirits that feed off of 'good' things like hope may be softened if there are lots of the good stuff and very little of the evil stuff. If Tzeentch had only hope, Slaanesh only love and positive desire, and Khorne only peaceful death from old age or accident, well, they might not end up being such tormentous monstrosities, then. Or maybe the Emperor will revive and become better than ever, instead or in additon. Or perhaps there will be new Gods, ones of joy and peace and prosperity and love.

All the people of the galaxy who are capable of good - this means you - should thus do so as much as they are able. Care for your friends and family. Love your spouse and children and make sure they are happy. Spare who you can from death or chaos. Don't lie or steal when you don't need to. Whenever you can, relax and find ways to enjoy yourself without harming others. It doesn't matter too much who you worship, though I suggest laying off of the "kill them all" rhetoric. Or not bow down to anyone, and simply act to the happiness of yourself and everyone you can.

Oh, and for the chaos gods who are listening here, does not tormenting souls get a little old after awhile?

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 01:26 PM
I was raised on a backwards planet on the very edge of the galaxy that nobody ever heard of, but I'd like to raise a point here:

Since it is pretty much established that the daemons and spirits are more or less reflections of the emotions and actions of the intelligent peoples of this galaxy, and bad things like rape or murder will inevitably provide food for Slaanesh or Nurgle or other chaos gods, then why not.... do and think good things? If there are good spirits, then they will be drawn by good emotions and good acts. Even 'evil' spirits that feed off of 'good' things like hope may be softened if there are lots of the good stuff and very little of the evil stuff. If Tzeentch had only hope, Slaanesh only love and positive desire, and Khorne only peaceful death from old age or accident, well, they might not end up being such tormentous monstrosities, then. Or maybe the Emperor will revive and become better than ever, instead or in additon. Or perhaps there will be new Gods, ones of joy and peace and prosperity and love.

All the people of the galaxy who are capable of good - this means you - should thus do so as much as they are able. Care for your friends and family. Love your spouse and children and make sure they are happy. Spare who you can from death or chaos. Don't lie or steal when you don't need to. Whenever you can, relax and find ways to enjoy yourself without harming others. It doesn't matter too much who you worship, though I suggest laying off of the "kill them all" rhetoric. Or not bow down to anyone, and simply act to the happiness of yourself and everyone you can.

Oh, and for the chaos gods who are listening here, does not tormenting souls get a little old after awhile?

It would seem that the Warp only exacerbates the worst in people - it's a twisted mirror of sentience, and so is sustained by all the bad things. Basically, it is all evil. As far as I can tell, there are several warp beings that, although nasty, would come close to being good:


The Emperor, when and if he returns as the Star Child, would be good news for humanity, at least, as things seemed comparatively utopian while he was in charge. That said, he did lead a genocidal 'kill everything that isn't of genus Homo' campaign.
Gork and Mork are the 'cleanest' warp entities - they respectively represent savage joy and savage cunning. They're horrendously violent, but they aren't prey to warp depredations.
Malal (now sadly discontinued due to a copyright screw-up, but, come on, can you really say that Be'Lakor, who started the entire Storm of Chaos campaign just to piss off the Chaos gods by killing Abaddon, wasn't serving him to some extent) is the force of self-destruction and fighting against the current order of the world. He HAETS chaos, and could be cast as a sort of reactive universal counterbalance.


Anyway, what you describe above is nowhere near GRIM nor DARK enough. Perhaps some gothic steampunky spikes and medieval grimy censers could be added?

Frosty
2008-04-24, 01:28 PM
That would be very impressive indeed, considering that that would be the first Grey Knight ever to fall to Chaos. At least, IIRC.

Dude, you know what would be more bad ass? If he manages to convert a few Sisters of Battle (and disable the auto-suicide mechanisms). Sisters of Tzeentch, march on! Sisters of Slaanesh, umm...don't march on. Stay at home with me.

Tola
2008-04-24, 01:34 PM
The problem with that is there's always war, murder, and death going on, mass amounts of pleasure and hedonism of all sorts, people seeking change(And not always the good changes) and the way of Knowledge, and god knows how much disease and despair. You can't weaken or soften them them, because in a galaxy with umpty-billion beings there'll easily be enough power for them to feed off.

I'm surpised the Orks haven't to a spore been dragged into Khorne's service. You'd think their very nature would make him even more bad-ass than one of the Big Four is already.

Dude, you know what would be more bad ass? If he manages to convert a few Sisters of Battle (and disable the auto-suicide mechanisms). Sisters of Tzeentch, march on! Sisters of Slaanesh, umm...don't march on. Stay at home with me.

Sisters of Khorne I can see.

...Now, an odd thought based off a line from Soulstorm;

"I've never met a cinder that wasn't faithful to the Emperor."

Necron-allied Sisters.

They're halfway to being human Necrons is their....zeal to purge and cleanse.

Eita
2008-04-24, 01:38 PM
I was raised on a backwards planet on the very edge of the galaxy that nobody ever heard of, but I'd like to raise a point here:

Since it is pretty much established that the daemons and spirits are more or less reflections of the emotions and actions of the intelligent peoples of this galaxy, and bad things like rape or murder will inevitably provide food for Slaanesh or Nurgle or other chaos gods, then why not.... do and think good things? If there are good spirits, then they will be drawn by good emotions and good acts. Even 'evil' spirits that feed off of 'good' things like hope may be softened if there are lots of the good stuff and very little of the evil stuff. If Tzeentch had only hope, Slaanesh only love and positive desire, and Khorne only peaceful death from old age or accident, well, they might not end up being such tormentous monstrosities, then. Or maybe the Emperor will revive and become better than ever, instead or in additon. Or perhaps there will be new Gods, ones of joy and peace and prosperity and love.

All the people of the galaxy who are capable of good - this means you - should thus do so as much as they are able. Care for your friends and family. Love your spouse and children and make sure they are happy. Spare who you can from death or chaos. Don't lie or steal when you don't need to. Whenever you can, relax and find ways to enjoy yourself without harming others. It doesn't matter too much who you worship, though I suggest laying off of the "kill them all" rhetoric. Or not bow down to anyone, and simply act to the happiness of yourself and everyone you can.

Oh, and for the chaos gods who are listening here, does not tormenting souls get a little old after awhile?

Lack of GRIMDARK detected.

Frosty, agreed...

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 01:43 PM
I'm surpised the Orks haven't to a spore been dragged into Khorne's service. You'd think their very nature would make him even more bad-ass than one of the Big Four is already.

That's the point. The Old Ones (read:the Slann from WHF) engineered them as an ineradicable, Chaos-resistant, biological weapon with an evolving genetic memory of technology, and a gestalt-hivemind capable of simultaneously making each one of them cooperate on a supernaturally organised scale. They're the last-ditch defence against the Necrons (da Madboyz haz da hedpower!), Tyranids (Squiggly beastz? In ur hiveship? It be moar likely 'dan u buggyz thinkin'!), and Chaos (woss dis' "kruption"? We liek fightin' da weirdbeasts!).

Also, waagh.

It disturbs me how similar Orky dialect is to Lolcat as a language.

IS THERE A CONNECTION !!?!?!

Corinthus
2008-04-24, 01:51 PM
Dem Humies Haz Moi BUKKKKKET!!!!!!

Bryn
2008-04-24, 01:58 PM
It disturbs me how similar Orky dialect is to Lolcat as a language.

IS THERE A CONNECTION !!?!?!

http://img234.imageshack.us/img234/5199/ghazgulcheezburgerlu1.png

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 02:03 PM
Dem Humies Haz Moi BUKKKKKET!!!!!!

http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/6837/bblimey0.png


http://img234.imageshack.us/img234/5199/ghazgulcheezburgerlu1.png

Halt, foul beast, lest you be destroyed in the cleansing fire! For Orkquisitor Eisenhorn, of Mork's Most Holy Orkquisition, is here!

http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/8197/eisenhornmr4.png

Solo
2008-04-24, 02:11 PM
I was raised on a backwards planet on the very edge of the galaxy that nobody ever heard of, but I'd like to raise a point here:

Since it is pretty much established that the daemons and spirits are more or less reflections of the emotions and actions of the intelligent peoples of this galaxy, and bad things like rape or murder will inevitably provide food for Slaanesh or Nurgle or other chaos gods, then why not.... do and think good things?

I can't tell a million New Yorkers to be nice to each other! Being miserable and treating other people like dirt is every New Yorker's God-given right.



* The Emperor, when and if he returns as the Star Child, would be good news for humanity, at least, as things seemed comparatively utopian while he was in charge. That said, he did lead a genocidal 'kill everything that isn't of genus Homo' campaign.
Mitigated by the fact that most of those aliens were trying to kill humans in nasty ways.

He seemed to have left the Watchers in the Dark alone, for what it's worth.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 02:16 PM
Mitigated by the fact that most of those aliens were trying to kill humans in nasty ways.

Mostly yes, but if they happened to be living on an Terra-wanted world ...


He seemed to have left the Watchers in the Dark alone, for what it's worth.

I was always of the impression that they were Cherubim-like psychic/biological constructs.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 02:34 PM
Oh, and for the chaos gods who are listening here, does not tormenting souls get a little old after awhile?

No.

Also, I would like to say I think Slaanesh would be the single hardest deity to knock off of the big for. Assuming he works based on pleasure, then that's gonna be tough. I mean just look how hard it is for the Eldar to reproduce. Or do anything that results in fun.

"I'm coming to bed now my PRECIOUS LITTLE MORSAL, I HAVE STOLEN YOUR SOUL FOR MY ETERNAL FEAST!"

"Man, what a delicious cheese burg PRECIOUS LITTLE MORSAL, I HAVE STOLEN YOUR SOUL FOR MY ETERNAL FEAST!"

Yes, I think Slaanesh speaks in pink.

And I want a set of Sisters of Slaanesh. They'd be cuddly and hopefully wouldn't be that distracted all the time.

Course, wouldn't they violate that whole agreement with "Corn and Slaanesh not being able to be on the same team" if their previous nature stuck with them?

Bryn
2008-04-24, 02:42 PM
Halt, foul beast, lest you be destroyed in the cleansing fire! For Orkquisitor Eisenhorn, of Mork's Most Holy Orkquisition, is here!

http://img183.imageshack.us/img183/3519/ghazgulcheezburgeronfiryn6.png
WE IZ BURNENG!
...
DO NOT WANT!

I tried to find that picture of the Kommando holding up a large painting of a Space Marine but I couldn't find it, so you get this.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 02:47 PM
And I want a set of Sisters of Slaanesh. They'd be cuddly and hopefully wouldn't be that distracted all the time.


I'd rather have a jeanstealer.:smallsmile:

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-24, 02:50 PM
The Watchers in the Dark are warp entities.

Orcs can fall to Chaos, anyway, if the picture in the Daemonhunters book is any judge. It's probably incredibly rare though, because what do the Chaos Gods have to offer them? The fact they operate on a closed-circuit psychic system helps as well.

On the note of 'final weapon of the Old Ones', my favourite daft 40K conspiracy theory is that that's what the 'Nids are.

Malal has elements of his role still present in the Sons of Malice chapter as well as Bel'akor.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-24, 02:50 PM
The Watchers in the Dark are warp entities.

Orcs can fall to Chaos, anyway, if the picture in the Daemonhunters book is any judge. It's probably incredibly rare though, because what do the Chaos Gods have to offer them? The fact they operate on a closed-circuit psychic system helps as well.

On the note of 'final weapon of the Old Ones', my favourite daft 40K conspiracy theory is that that's what the 'Nids are.

Malal has elements of his role still present in the Sons of Malice chapter as well as Bel'akor.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 02:57 PM
http://img183.imageshack.us/img183/3519/ghazgulcheezburgeronfiryn6.png
WE IZ BURNENG!
...
DO NOT WANT!

I tried to find that picture of the Kommando holding up a large painting of a Space Marine but I couldn't find it, so you get this.

http://img110.imageshack.us/img110/9631/orkrusou8.png

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 03:01 PM
I thought that the orks just were way too faithful in their odd way to Gork an' Mork to really support Khorne directly. I mean, sure he'll get the excess, but the majority would go to them two from the orky side of things.

NSFW. Also, In the grim darkness (really grimdark!) of the 41st Milenium there is only...

http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh157/koboldkommando/loveandpeace.png

Bryn
2008-04-24, 03:11 PM
Touché, seer* Scribe. But two can play at that game.

http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/8335/seriousinquisicatpz3.png

*Oh yes, I referenced Dominic Deegan. If I wasn't going to hell before, well...

Frosty
2008-04-24, 03:18 PM
I thought that the orks just were way too faithful in their odd way to Gork an' Mork to really support Khorne directly. I mean, sure he'll get the excess, but the majority would go to them two from the orky side of things.

NSFW. Also, In the grim darkness (really grimdark!) of the 41st Milenium there is only...

http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh157/koboldkommando/loveandpeace.png

Damn work censors. I can't see ANY of the images on this thread.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 03:43 PM
And another for you.


http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj312/ArtifexRolls/space.jpg

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 04:06 PM
I see your macro, Z-Axis, and raise you a ... a ... what has science done?

http://img110.imageshack.us/img110/8610/aggghhhorkbs8.png

Also, Artifex, I had another one of the 'In the Grim Darkness of the Far Future there is only Kawaii' pictures; I'll try to drag it up.

Thane of Fife
2008-04-24, 04:07 PM
And I want a set of Sisters of Slaanesh. They'd be cuddly and hopefully wouldn't be that distracted all the time.

Course, wouldn't they violate that whole agreement with "Corn and Slaanesh not being able to be on the same team" if their previous nature stuck with them?

But remember, Slaanesh is the god of pain, too. You can't have the Delectable without the Torture, or the Enrapturing without the Spasms.

The Sandman
2008-04-24, 04:33 PM
The Necrons seem to have been noticeably silent on this thread. What do you think they're up to? :smallconfused:

Also, I'm betting they make the Tau more evil before they make the Orks more evil. The Tau are actually almost benevolent at times!

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 04:37 PM
Also, I'm betting they make the Tau more evil before they make the Orks more evil. The Tau are actually almost benevolent at times!

Nah, that was last codex. They're quasi-Nazi imperialists with a penchant for mind control of 'lesser races', now.


The Necrons seem to have been noticeably silent on this thread. What do you think they're up to? :smallconfused:

Being PIRATES!

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1162726/images/097.jpg

Eita
2008-04-24, 04:40 PM
Thank you Illiterate Scribe... Thank you.

puppyavenger
2008-04-24, 04:42 PM
On the note of 'final weapon of the Old Ones', my favourite daft 40K conspiracy theory is that that's what the 'Nids are.


my personal one is they're a insane old one's legacy drawn to the imperium by the Emperor.

also, the emperor isn't ewxactly known for being understanding or patient (see thousand suns).

and if you ask me the hardes god to kill would be Tzeetch. Go on try, to elimnate change from you're life, just try. or hope, or knowledge or planning. or evolution. or (slightly easier) complex machevilian schemes. or sorcery. or grammer

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 04:42 PM
Thank you Illiterate Scribe... Thank you.

There is more, although I'd be lying if I claimed any credit for it.

Leliel
2008-04-24, 04:45 PM
Foolish traitor! You have left the the Emperor's Light and have damned yourself and your flock to the mercies of a Dark God! When the Architect of Fate is done with you your very soul shall be scattered to the winds! Death will be but a fleeting dream in that dark place as Tzeentch tortures every fiber of your being. Your only solace will be the memories of the Almighty God-Emperor and how you abandoned him!

And now for the guy who the Grey Knight thinks is too fanatical. Oy.

Then as the Thousand Sons reveal themselves to be the wolves they are they shall descend upon your worlds and destroy the sheep that live there in false security.

Which would be really surprising, given that I read the minds of them to see if they had, have, or going to be having any want or thought to do so. They didn't.

And now you have poor grammar.

Know this Fallen One, the Gods of Chaos know no reason. They seek to destroy all Mankind, even if it means the very end of their existence. It is heretics like you who flirted with notions of allying or conquering with Daemons who brought the very fall of the Emperor Himself! Magnus the One-Eyed used sorcery most foul to cloud the visions of Guider of Man and hide the Treachery of Horus.

Funny. I thought that Magus specifically used sorcery to warn the Emperor of Horus' betrayal, but he was too blinded by his favoritism to see that Magus was trying to help him, and prevent the Heresy in the first place, at which point Guilman was tricked by Horus into causing the Sons' fall in the first place.

Oh wait, I know that, because a sorcerer friend of mind lived through the whole dammed thing!

And believe me, I know my master, and he is far smarter then to destroy his food source.

The wails of millions shall fill the streets of every world loyal to the Emperor as you go forth on your plans for "good". Unbeknown to you the Changer of Ways shall change all under your sway and brand unto them his Mark. A fate worse then death awaits, but such is the Emperor that He will seek to save them from the Dark One's grasp.

Firstly, they would, but they don't know of the massive threat lying at their doorstep, because you're afraid of what might happen if they know about it.

Secondly, what's so bad about being a psyker? True, you have the hostile daemons, and the Warp visions, but really, there's a lot of benefit. Here's what I'll predict what will happen:

The forces of the Imperium go to "free" my planet, but on the way, they encounter a bunch of Necrons. After a long and bloody battle, they emerge victorious, but with massive casualties, and press on. They emerge at the planet, only to be crushed by my force's superior numbers, since the high amount of psykers allowed us to repel the Necrons with minimal losses, as well as give them some much needed experience.

Oh, and we know how our technology works, so we recycle your ships into a fleet for the Thousand Sons' invasion force.

A thousand bells will toll with day of your fall as on angel's wings a heavenly sword of divine might pierces your black heart. The wings and weapons of the Adeptus Astartes shall be your downfall and the Holy Bolter shall be their sword! With fire and flame they shall cleanse the dark places that languished so under your shadow.

At which point I will emerge from the safety of the Warp and quickly reconquer the planets I lost, who will be happy to see me.

Maidens shall weep as the last of the true horrors you have brought come to life and the few lucky enough to survive them put to death. Such is the fate for all who near such evil, and fortunate are they. For if they are still pure of heart they shall enter the Emperor's Embrace. Then as your shadow lifts a heavenly choir shall sing as those worlds reenter the Fold of the Imperium.

See above, and then I shall show how much more competent I am then the Imperium is by helping wipe out a dangerous group of Tyranids with minimal casualties.

Death to the Heretics! Purge the Unclean! Execute the Traitors! Annihilate the Xenos!

Blah, blah, blah, and more blah.

Long live the Emperor and His Mighty Imperium of Man!

"And ignore the fact that we are keeping him from reincarnating by keeping him alive, and he probably is more than a little angry with us right now!"



To the more stupid Orks: See comment on creating something I can read, but add needing to spell Waagh correctly.

To my esteemed college in Tzeentch: I have no doubt that a lot of what I do is evil, and I fully intend to garner power for myself, but I will still try to do equal and more good things.

And by good, I mean the truly altruistic stuff, not the Imperium's way of doing things.

To the naive planetdweller: That is exactly my point, and I advise you to keep a lid on it if you join the Imperial Navy. They don't like mercy.

To Slanneshian: Sorry, but no. I am more of the kind of person who is devoted to knowledge for knowledge's sake, and a life of wanton hedonism just doesn't do it for me.

I view you as a far better alternative to Khronites, though.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 04:54 PM
This thread is Win.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 04:55 PM
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1162726/images/356.jpg


Youuur ... pathetic concepts of good ... aaand evil are deluuusional. Lie down ... relax ... do not resist ... an' be battered wit' ah cannons! Yaha, mateys! Full port broadside! Yaargh!

Eita
2008-04-24, 05:05 PM
Alright, tired, so, no Inquisitor Eita for you Leliel.

Actually, the Grey Knights would probably slap me upside the head for sending a message in the first place and just finding your location and killing you.

Now you're just being silly. You're breaking with the very flavor of Chaos Marines.

Yeah, when he could've just sent a simple physic message instead. Also, you trust someone who fell to Chaos? Now you're just stupid, even though he probably showed you something close enough to the truth. We don't know much about the Chaos Gods anyway. Their eventual goal is a mystery. So, stop twisting flavor text just to help your idea.

Actually, by his Mark, I meant horrible mutations that shall serve to do naught but torture their eternal souls. Because, well, that's how the Architect of Fate rolls.

1. You'd be banished to the Warp for some time.
2. Yes, because they really want a naive daemon prince ruling over them instead of just the Imperium who at least know they're not the best guys around.

Kill 'nids with low casualties how? Also, I should point out that the Necrons actually have abilities that nullify physic abilities.

If the Emperor dies, Mankind is screwed. First of all, the tainted Imperial Webway would open up, letting daemons loose on Holy Terra. Secondly, it will take time for his mind to reassemble and take its place in a developing body, and even then it has to mature yet again. Do you think the Gods of Chaos will wait? The Emperor was the eternal bulwark against Mankind's eternal damnation. The Chaos Gods will use the ten or so years they have to make merry hell. Thirdly, the Astromonican would go out, having some rather obvious consequences. And finally, he ASKED to be put in the Golden Throne.

Selrahc
2008-04-24, 05:09 PM
He seemed to have left the Watchers in the Dark alone, for what it's worth.

Theres a few other protectorate species. The jokaero have been declared off limits for purges, due to their useful nature (Rubbish breeding cycle, peaceful nature, military incompetence, but the ability to manifacture beautiful and deadly minituarized weapons)

Other species have been declared as protectorates of man, but it remains a tenuous relationship, since Inquisitors are likely to blunder in and break the peace.

Similarly human communities who don't worship the emperor but don't worship chaos or xenos are allowed to remain independent, so long as they give the tithe, and allow scrutiny.

How ever, all this goes flying out of the window if a particularily zealous official takes offence.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-24, 05:10 PM
I'm more of a Slaaneshi/Tzeentchian worshiper with lots of extra Khorne for that delicious wanton bloodshed taste. Nurgle however, is a weak and pestulant fool, without whom the galaxy would be a far better place. Forget the weakling servants of the Corpse God, their pitiful Imperium shall collapse... in time. Before then however, the TRUE Carrion Lord, the Lord of Decay, the God of Plagues, the wretched Nurgle, the bloated grandfather himself, must join the corpses that litter the fields. When the enemy of Change falls, the disgusting blemish which so plagued the Prince of Chaos lies dead before the Satin Throne, and the bloated corpses head is offered up to Khorne himself, then, truly, the conquest may begin!

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-24, 05:14 PM
While Leliel's character does contain dangerously high levels of NERD-RAGE-ogenic materials, I have to address one thing.


Kill 'nids with low casualties how? Also, I should point out that the Necrons actually have abilities that nullify physic abilities.

Yes, but they are comparatively weaker vs. warp attacks than living things; no psychic ability to fend off attacks, the Pariahs are actually abducted humans, warp energy is anathema to C'tan (why Blackstones are some of the few things capable of permakilling them).

Leliel
2008-04-24, 05:25 PM
Alright, tired, so, no Inquisitor Eita for you Leliel.

Phew

Actually, the Grey Knights would probably slap me upside the head for sending a message in the first place and just finding your location and killing you.

Now you're just being silly. You're breaking with the very flavor of Chaos Marines.

I was already.

Yeah, when he could've just sent a simple physic message instead. Also, you trust someone who fell to Chaos? Now you're just stupid, even though he probably showed you something close enough to the truth. We don't know much about the Chaos Gods anyway. Their eventual goal is a mystery. So, stop twisting flavor text just to help your idea.

That's why I read his mind. No untruth's there.

Actually, by his Mark, I meant horrible mutations that shall serve to do naught but torture their eternal souls. Because, well, that's how the Architect of Fate rolls.

True.

1. You'd be banished to the Warp for some time.
2. Yes, because they really want a naive daemon prince ruling over them instead of just the Imperium who at least know they're not the best guys around.

1. True, and 2. The alternitive is genocide. Not much of an option there

Kill 'nids with low casualties how?

By staying back and blasting them with psyker powers and resserectable Rubic Marines and immortal daemons. I never said there wouldn't be incapacitated troops, just recoverable ones.

Also, I should point out that the Necrons actually have abilities that nullify physic abilities.

Psykers are still anathema to C'tan, and sheer numbers helps as well

If the Emperor dies, Mankind is screwed.

I have no doubt. I was actually ranting IC there.

First of all, the tainted Imperial Webway would open up, letting daemons loose on Holy Terra. Secondly, it will take time for his mind to reassemble and take its place in a developing body, and even then it has to mature yet again. Do you think the Gods of Chaos will wait? The Emperor was the eternal bulwark against Mankind's eternal damnation. The Chaos Gods will use the ten or so years they have to make merry hell. Thirdly, the Astromonican would go out, having some rather obvious consequences.

True, true, and more true. Once again, IC, I don't know that.

And finally, he ASKED to be put in the Golden Throne.

I have no responce other than "true".

EDIT: Oops...I forgot about the Tyranids ability to force daemons to stay in the warp. My original point about Rubics still stands though.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-24, 05:45 PM
Actually, while he asked to be put in the Golden Throne, if the Lords of Terra had actually tried, and used the knowledge they had, they could have brought him back. But you know what the say about absolute power... ALL HAIL TZEENTCH, THE ARCHITECT OF FATE!

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-24, 06:22 PM
The original purpose of the Inquisition was to prevent the Emperor from being reincarnated. A group of four high-ups in the Imperium split down the middle over the decision. The Thorians don't know it, but they're the descendants of the original radical faction.

Protected species (or at least not actively hunted ones) that the Imperium can tolerate will include the Xenarch and the Hrud, I think. Remember that Monodominance - the divine right of man to rule the galaxy - isn't adhered to by everyone in a position of authority in the Imperium.

I think an integral part of 40K is that it's a stalemate of war on the galactic scale. The only races that really have the potential to 'win' would be the Tyranids (because there could be six hive fleets for every Imperial planet) or the Necrons (because there's not enough left to resist them if they all manage to wake up). Of course this can never happen, but I'd say for every other faction victory really is an impossibilty.

The idea of using the power of the Chaos Gods against them is one that has merit, but it's a fundamental, unavoidable truth that ultimately you will lose.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-24, 06:43 PM
Maybe, maybe not. I tend to agree with the Revilers captain from Conquest of Armageddon, who used a Daemon-glaive against the Khorne Berzerker, Hrothqar Furor, who said that it took a man of true faith to use the enemies weapons against them. But maybe thats just because he was kick ass and I hate Black Templars.

Eita
2008-04-24, 06:52 PM
While Leliel's character does contain dangerously high levels of NERD-RAGE-ogenic materials, I have to address one thing.



Yes, but they are comparatively weaker vs. warp attacks than living things; no psychic ability to fend off attacks, the Pariahs are actually abducted humans, warp energy is anathema to C'tan (why Blackstones are some of the few things capable of permakilling them).

True, true. However, I'm pretty sure that the Necrons would realize that they'd be going up against the Thousand Sons. As such, Null Fields ahoy!

puppyavenger
2008-04-24, 07:07 PM
Actually, while he asked to be put in the Golden Throne, if the Lords of Terra had actually tried, and used the knowledge they had, they could have brought him back. But you know what the say about absolute power... ALL HAIL TZEENTCH, THE ARCHITECT OF FATE!

also note the inquisitions original purpose was to prevent the Emperors ressurection and the massive war that would follow
and now, a Tyranid perspective

translation


The Imperium is a dying relic, a stubborn weed with deep roots. You claim the Imperium is eternal, yet you fight a losing war on all sides. Each day you lose millions of troops and 10's of almost irreplaceable ones. and almost all you're victories are defences. how often do planets reject the imperium, keeping their own council or that of others? how often do you reclaim these worlds? How often do you reclaim worlds taken by the major factions? or the Tau? how often do you win them back? how often are habitable?

You claim humanities divine right of ruler ship to the stars. Let us look back in time and see how the galaxy was before humanity rose.

The Old Ones reached perfection. playing god so easily that they became him. They used servitors for all tasks, and mastered the then placid warp for instant travel. but the bitter hatred and jealousy of the necrotyr and the star-rending sadism of the C'tan rose to fight them. In their desperation they created many races, eldar Phsykers and ork warriors. The massive number of Psychic and free-willed creatures awakened the warp and spawned the chaos gods. In the great battle a stalemate was reached. The Old Ones were cast to Oblivion, the Daemons hid in the warp and the C'tan fell amongst them selves and eventually went into slumber.

Their successors would logically the two most successful species of their design, the Eldar and Orks. as the idea of a Ork-run galaxy brings something between a whimper and a suicide attempt, the Eldar ascended. Masters of the warp, they conquered the daemons and drove them to their haunts. Rising like a shining jewel, the Eldar empire grew, and in time, collapsed on itself. Freed from any hardship, the Eldar fell to hedonism and blood cults. When Sleanesh was born their time ended.

That is when anarchy begins, the eldar had no successor. Humanity is not a king, but an opportunistic warlord. Your mandate is of fire and blood, of ships and tanks, atrocities and speeches, propaganda and secret police. your crown is one of blood, a dangerously unstable crown for a race chained to it's world.

Now let us move on to humanities ubiquitous failures, and your "God". First came humanities golden age. You, like the Old Ones before you, relied on servitors for all your demands. But you gave too much intelligence to your mechanical men, and your control was incomplete. Yet the Emperor was alive, and in his omnificent omnipotence he abstained from humanities first downfall.

Next came the "great Crusade" to reclaim humanity with your god at it's helm. notably unworshiped. He created 20 legions of perfect super-soldiers and squandered them. One was his personal hit-squad, which he deposed of as convenient. Then he, in his complete wisdom, drove his Greatest champion into the warp-gods hands. He drove away his worshippers and declared those who tried to warn him traitors. His realm was ruined and him entombed.

Since then the Imperium has in no particular order: declared itself a theocracy, allowed itself to be ruled itself to be ruled by an autocratic council of mutants, cyborgs, bearcats, and an origination who's main purpose is to prevent the resurrection of the Emperor, created said organisation to prevent the Emperors resurrection, given it executive power and carte blache, organized a rebellion against a true theocrat, declared phsykers and mutants evil and destructive, made mutants and phsykers an integral part of the economy and military, etc.

The imperium is the shadow of a shadow of a false gods failure.


The tyranids succeeded where the Emperor faltered. The fleets cast aside the warp and it's machinations. WE are as perfect as everything we've met so far combined. As long as there is free will there is want, as long as there is want, there's jealousy, as long as there is free will, there is war.

The great ones come to cleanse the stars and bring the peace of ages, all shall join, peacefully or not.


origanal message
A NOM NOM NOM NOM

Eita
2008-04-24, 07:14 PM
Please. Don't patronize us. We all took Tyranid in High School.

puppyavenger
2008-04-24, 07:19 PM
Please. Don't patronize us. We all took Tyranid in High School.

ah....what?

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-24, 07:19 PM
Hey hey hey, what do you mean "MY" Imperium and "My" God? I am a devout follower of the Dark Gods, no Carrion God for me! (That means you too Nurgle you disgusting worm)

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-24, 07:24 PM
I actually barely passed Tryanid. I thought he said something about his aunt looking good in the carrion fields wearing his dead uncle for a dress.

Whatever that means. Crazy 'nids and their antics! They nead their own show!

"How I Ate Your Mother!"

"Hive Guy"

"King of the Swarm!"

"Gred: A Tyranid's Tearful Tale"

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-24, 07:32 PM
Surely "Two and a half men" would be more appropriate.

Also: Old Ones using servitors?? I take it you meant a less specific definition.

DanielX
2008-04-24, 10:02 PM
Anyway, what you describe above is nowhere near GRIM nor DARK enough. Perhaps some gothic steampunky spikes and medieval grimy censers could be added?

Although I am going to be accused of 'missing the point' or being a heretic, isn't the whole grim/dark stuff what is screwing everyone up to begin with?

Who says the warp must be entirely negative? Perhaps it is merely because there is a lot of negative energy being put out by all the constant war, suffering, and hate. I can sense it. The warp is cold, it is full of the wails of a trillion damned souls. But what if it were a sea of love and joy? Is that so impossible? Is the fabric of the universe so corrupted, that it cannot be freed from torment? No! No, I say! If we have damned ourselves through our hate, we can reclaim it with love!
They should merge Warhammer-world with Hello-Kitty-world. The result would be about 'even', methinks, neither too sickeningly-sweet nor too grimdark...

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-04-24, 10:08 PM
Although I am going to be accused of 'missing the point' or being a heretic, isn't the whole grim/dark stuff what is screwing everyone up to begin with?

Who says the warp must be entirely negative? Perhaps it is merely because there is a lot of negative energy being put out by all the constant war, suffering, and hate. I can sense it. The warp is cold, it is full of the wails of a trillion damned souls. But what if it were a sea of love and joy? Is that so impossible? Is the fabric of the universe so corrupted, that it cannot be freed from torment? No! No, I say! If we have damned ourselves through our hate, we can reclaim it with love!
They should merge Warhammer-world with Hello-Kitty-world. The result would be about 'even', methinks, neither too sickeningly-sweet nor too grimdark...Like this?
http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m126/stoopidtallkid/RPG%20motivational/40k/40K-Chibi.jpg

Solo
2008-04-24, 10:29 PM
This thread has been irredeemably tainted by Chaos - see their foul murals and twisted depictions of our glorious Imperium!

Inquisitors, the time has come for Extermatus. May the Emperor have mercy on those who posted these heresies, for we shall have none.

Rutee
2008-04-24, 10:34 PM
Like this?
http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m126/stoopidtallkid/RPG%20motivational/40k/40K-Chibi.jpg

I approve of this message.

Eita
2008-04-24, 11:01 PM
This thread has been irredeemably tainted by Chaos - see their foul murals and twisted depictions of our glorious Imperium!

Inquisitors, the time has come for Extermatus. May the Emperor have mercy on those who posted these heresies, for we shall have none.

It shall be done my Lord Inquisitor. The holy fires of the Emperor's Hand, the mighty Imperial Navy shall cleanse this world.

Exterminatus Totalus Immiediantus!

Death to the heretics! The righteous fury of the very foundries of Mars shall descend upon thee and smite thee! Thou shall know no respite, only a thousand years of torment for each heresy committed!

And then as you are lucky enough to know the sweet release of thine death, the Immortal God-Emperor of Mankind, Master and Guider of His race, the Shining Light in the Eternal Darkness of the Warp, Final Bulwark against the Terror, Unifier of Holy Terra and Mars, the Patron and Savior of All under His most Benevolent Wing shall come unto thee and punish thee for thou's crimes against His Most Holy Person!

Cleanse! Burn! Kill!

SurlySeraph
2008-04-24, 11:19 PM
*vile bug-like chirping*

You are Tyranids. You are more bloodthirsty than the Khornates, less free-willed than the Tau, more mindless than the Orks, and more viscerally disgusting than the Dark Eldar. We shall crush you all like the vile insects that you are, no matter what your numbers may be, and the decay of your stacked corpses shall form new soil for the planets you eat. The heretics and xenos have shown that they are willing to aid us against your kind, and this galaxy is not big enough for your kind and everything else. We will keep you out of our galaxy until whatever you are fleeing from catches up to you. And then you'll be the one devoured, won't you be, O Great Devourer?


This thread has been irredeemably tainted by Chaos - see their foul murals and twisted depictions of our glorious Imperium!

Inquisitors, the time has come for Extermatus. May the Emperor have mercy on those who posted these heresies, for we shall have none.

Patience, brothers! I am a Xanthian am a Tau sympathizer know how we can use the might of Malal turn our enemies against each other, for the Greater Good greater good of the Imperium!

Just let the mad fools squat on this Emperor-forsaken chunk of rock, piercing each others hearts until only the strongest remains. Then we arm the strongest and lead it to the next planet that the xenos fight each for. The process continues until there are only a few exhausted survivors who are easy prey for the Emperor's Wrath. Only patience and guile are necessary, not massive power.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 12:38 AM
This thread has been irredeemably tainted by Chaos - see their foul murals and twisted depictions of our glorious Imperium!

Inquisitors, the time has come for Extermatus. May the Emperor have mercy on those who posted these heresies, for we shall have none.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1104829/images/390.png

Solo
2008-04-25, 12:42 AM
Exterminatus Totalus Immiediantus!

And if I may be so bold as to add...

"Hereticus, Mutanicus, Demonicus, Xenoius Go Awayus!"

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 12:57 AM
The art's terrible, but I found it. Rutee, you may appreciate this http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/1889/094qc0.jpg


OMG KAWAII PREGNANT ORK WOMEN, etc.

Solo
2008-04-25, 01:02 AM
High Inquisitor Eita, I believe the Grey Knights have a new target.

The Heretic known as the Illiterate Scribe, who is clearly a follower of Tzneetch, for how else could an illiterate man scribe but by the foulest acts of sorcery?

And no doubt what he does scribe is heretical and blasphemous in the extreme.

tyckspoon
2008-04-25, 01:02 AM
...
...

Goddamn 36.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-04-25, 01:13 AM
You mean 34.

Also, surprisingly, Space Marines can be very tender. Why didn't you mention this, Solo?
http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m126/stoopidtallkid/RPG%20motivational/40k/Kim_meets_Space_Marine_by_Sanity_X.jpg

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 01:16 AM
You mean 34.

Also, surprisingly, Space Marines can be very tender. Why didn't you mention this, Solo?
http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m126/stoopidtallkid/RPG%20motivational/40k/Kim_meets_Space_Marine_by_Sanity_X.jpg

Haha, oh wow ... is that some Kim Possible/Adeptus Astartes cross-over?

tyckspoon
2008-04-25, 01:17 AM
No, that's a 36. It'd be a 34 with a little less clothing, but it's not.

Rutee
2008-04-25, 01:25 AM
The art's terrible, but I found it. Rutee, you may appreciate this http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/1889/094qc0.jpg


OMG KAWAII PREGNANT ORK WOMEN, etc.

*Stamps an approved messagE*


No, that's a 36. It'd be a 34 with a little less clothing, but it's not.
so what's 36?

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 01:32 AM
*Stamps an approved messagE*


so what's 36?


No matter what it is, it is somebody's fetish. No exceptions.

although my translation from the original latin may be a little extreme.

There's also a fair bit of Rule 63 here, as well:


For any given male character, there is a female version of that character.

Rutee
2008-04-25, 01:34 AM
63 I know. Fairly common to subject Fighting Game characters to. Female Dio Brando is wtf?

Solo
2008-04-25, 01:34 AM
Mark my words, you will be expunged.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-04-25, 02:18 AM
I have to ask:
Who was that aimed at?

Belteshazzar
2008-04-25, 07:25 AM
Probable no one in particular. 4-chan images are like buckshot, just load some in your barrel and your sure to hit some-ones fetish sooner or later. That or force a sanity check.

Ironicly it turns out that viral memes (injected along with some living metal) are the one way the Adeptus Mechanus prepares is personal guard. By exposing them to all the collected horrific ideas they have ever encountered they steel their minds against futher horrors. Of course its probably like having contents of all the darkest pits of internet scum and villenry dumped into your head at once but it brings up images of a guardsman mumbling in lolcats while thrashing around in a fever.

Frosty
2008-04-25, 09:37 AM
NO! Don't show me 4chan!!! I must resist the taint!

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-25, 09:50 AM
This thread is made of so much win, it's surely going to wrap in on itself and cause the end of the universe.

ChocolateChtulu
2008-04-25, 10:26 AM
The Necrons' statement:

You live. For this, you deserve death.
Your allegiances are of no consequence: garnish your soul with the mayonnaise of the emperor or with the ketchup of the warp, for our dark lords are not picky about condiments.

Starsinger
2008-04-25, 11:05 AM
What's more grimdark than this? http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n90/Starsinger17/MPost386-IntheGrimFutureofHelloKitt.jpg

Eita
2008-04-25, 11:13 AM
Lord Inquisitor Solo, I believe I have found merit for this damned world after all...

Battle-Brother Belteshazzar, for only a member of the Adeptus Astartes could withstand such taint for so long, has enlightened me. True, the original heretic must be destroyed, but the remainder may be of some use.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-25, 11:34 AM
Surely they do not use lolcats, Goadsee, limeparty in conjunction with 2grills1mup!

The Tau now have true reason to liberate the people you oppress! Such vile acts against the very nature of sentience puts you no higher then the Y'he!

((Shock images names' change to protect the Shan'al and those who wish to join the Greater Good.))

Leliel
2008-04-25, 11:38 AM
Lord Inquisitor Solo, I believe I have found merit for this damned world after all...

Battle-Brother Belteshazzar, for only a member of the Adeptus Astartes could withstand such taint for so long, has enlightened me. True, the original heretic must be destroyed, but the remainder may be of some use.

BEHOLD, HYPOCRISY!

To those talking about Exterminatus: Not on my watch, and more so, ask yourself if Power over Change-like say, that which my master has-also includes the power to create life. It wouldn't be too hard-a few oxygen atoms here, a few proteins here-and then introducing life from a healthy world to, I don't know...de-Exterminize a planet?

Be careful of apathy and negelct...Things could change in your abscence.

To Tyranids: See De-Exterminizing process, above, and change it to "de-Tyranize". And yes, we are posting forces around the base to make sure you don't come back. Stalemate works in our favor.

To Necrons: You need better metaphor processors, and the forces of Chaos also have practically infinte resourses.

Remember, your gods fear the Warp as well...

To everyone: By the power of Tzeentch, the Architect of Fate, I command you to GET BACK ON TOPIC!

Although he did like the motiviational posters.

Destro_Yersul
2008-04-25, 12:01 PM
'FOOLS!'

the voice was heard before the figure even became visible, a massive man in a full suit of terminator armour. But this armour was different, somehow. It bore the colours and sigils of a Space Marine librarian, though they had been changed. Lightning crackled across the surface of the armour as the figure spoke again, illuminating the chapter badge on his shoulder. He was a member of the Guardians of Eternity, fallen from the Emperor's light.

'You doubt the Lord Tzeentch, Changer of Ways? You doubt that his plans are flawless? They span far beyond the reach of your years, and they will come to pass. We are all just pieces in his grand game, and the wise do well to ensure they are a valuable piece.'

The giant glares down at the screen in front of him, wondering to himself whether they were really listening. In the end, it didn't matter.

'So what is it, poor blind fools? Are you a King, or are you a Pawn?'

Solo
2008-04-25, 12:02 PM
To those talking about Exterminatus: Not on my watch
Speaks the man powerless to resist the might of the Imperium of Man!


and more so, ask yourself if Power over Change-like say, that which my master has-also includes the power to create life. It wouldn't be too hard-a few oxygen atoms here, a few proteins here-and then introducing life from a healthy world to, I don't know...de-Exterminize a planet?
And would not changing a planet from living to dead also be... change?



To everyone: By the power of Tzeentch, the Architect of Fate, I command you to GET BACK ON TOPIC!
There is no change, there is only WAR!

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 12:14 PM
I believe that we judged your character to be insufficiently GRIMDARK many posts ago. This thread has now been hijacked (by Necron Pirates) and is cast adrift in the Immaterium.

In that light:

I give you Jeanstealer, the adorable Tyranid!

http://i245.photobucket.com/albums/gg53/tyrajeanstealer/jeanstealerfull.png
Spoilered for largeness. Before you ask, it's within board guidlines, I checked.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-25, 12:32 PM
Illiterate Scribe's posts have maxed out my insanity points.

Tzeentch has nothing on pregnant orks and 'jeanstealers'.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 12:35 PM
Illiterate Scribe's posts have maxed out my insanity points.

Tzeentch has nothing on pregnant orks and 'jeanstealers'.

I'd let her steal my jeans, if you know what I mean.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-25, 12:44 PM
Goddamnit, I need to actually draw some stuff now to keep ahead.

Also, she's no jeanstealer! She's only got 3 arms!

((Thank you +30 bonus to resist pictures talent!))

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-25, 12:47 PM
I'd let her steal my jeans, if you know what I mean.

It'd be much, much worse if you let her steal your genes.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-25, 12:57 PM
Goddamnit, I need to actually draw some stuff now to keep ahead.

Nah, don't worry - while I did some of the early jeanstealer and /tg/ stuff, I'm currently cruising on repost repost repost.


Also, she's no jeanstealer! She's only got 3 arms!

Other one's behind back.

puppyavenger
2008-04-25, 02:30 PM
Also: Old Ones using servitors?? I take it you meant a less specific definition.

yes, I meant it in it's non-40k meaning

[QUOTE=SurlySeraph;4242040]You are Tyranids. You are more bloodthirsty than the Khornates, less free-willed than the Tau, more mindless than the Orks, and more viscerally disgusting than the Dark Eldar.
older than the eldar, more intelligent than the Tzeetchians, more powerful than the imperium. and if believe appearance a component on morality, may I suggest you begin the purging of mars.
We shall crush you all like the vile insects that you are, no matter what your numbers may be, and the decay of your stacked corpses shall form new soil for the planets you eat. The heretics and xenos have shown that they are willing to aid us against your kind, and this galaxy is not big enough for your kind and everything else. We will keep you out of our galaxy until whatever you are fleeing from catches up to you. And then you'll be the one devoured, won't you be, O Great Devourer?
Why would we flee? nothing stands behind us but peace, emptiness and silence. ha we have more Leviathans than you have las-guns in your pitiful galaxy. and the alliance between you and the other faction only further demonstrates the great hypocrisy that is the Imperium



[QUOTE=Leliel;4244342]
To Tyranids: See De-Exterminizing process, above, and change it to "de-Tyranize". And yes, we are posting forces around the base to make sure you don't come back. Stalemate works in our favour.
[QUOTE]

You think you can control life? The Fleets spores cause plants to grow beyond any thing you could imagine, and reduce animals such as yourself to corpses. To defeat us in such a contest you must break the Shadow. A feat of which even your epithermal masters are incapable.
to necrons. What is alive? are you, your bodies replaced with living metal? are the legion cybernetica of old earth? are the imperiums servitors? The eldar souls flowing in there infinity circuit? the warp spirits that this discussions' host worships? your gods themselves?

Bryn
2008-04-25, 03:00 PM
Two things! First off, I surrender to thee, Illiterate Scribe. Damn /tg/ and all that it has wrought.

O EMPEROR, I HAVE FAILED THEE!
http://img178.imageshack.us/img178/8696/arcoflagellantmishwh8.png

....aaaaand secondly, this thread is
http://img74.imageshack.us/img74/5927/winsealco9.png

That is all

Solo
2008-04-25, 03:05 PM
NOM NOM NOM

And yet you remain but another faction battling for control of the galaxy.

puppyavenger
2008-04-25, 03:29 PM
And yet you remain but another faction battling for control of the galaxy.

Do we ever stop you from retaking the worlds we pass? do we control or rule any worlds? Do we have factories and cathedrals and cities covering entire worlds?

Solo
2008-04-25, 03:52 PM
Do we ever stop you from retaking the worlds we pass? do we control or rule any worlds? Do we have factories and cathedrals and cities covering entire worlds?

I'll be impressed when you end one race or the other.

puppyavenger
2008-04-25, 03:53 PM
I'll be impressed when you end one race or the other.

It's only a matter of time intill we find the dark eldarcapital.

Bryn
2008-04-25, 04:02 PM
Do we ever stop you from retaking the worlds we pass? do we control or rule any worlds? Do we have factories and cathedrals and cities covering entire worlds?
I love settling airless balls of rock, don't you? After all, who doesn't enjoy a challenge?

It's only a matter of time intill we find the dark eldarcapital.
Dimension-hopping Nids? Oh shiiiiiii-

:smalltongue:

Eita
2008-04-25, 08:28 PM
I love settling airless balls of rock, don't you? After all, who doesn't enjoy a challenge?

This is a job for some dwarves (http://dwarf.lendemaindeveille.com/index.php/Main_Page). If they can turn a glacier into the dwarven capitol, this will be a cake walk!

puppyavenger
2008-04-25, 08:34 PM
I love settling airless balls of rock, don't you? After all, who doesn't enjoy a challenge?

:

We were simply disproving the statment that we were fighting for control of the galaxyyou all hide in the web-way for a few hundred million years, we'll be gone.

Also why does 40k still use our calender for years?

Eita
2008-04-25, 08:51 PM
Because the Emperor said so.

tyckspoon
2008-04-25, 08:56 PM
Also why does 40k still use our calender for years?

Because it's mostly centered around humanity and humanity is centered around Holy Terra, which naturally uses Earth years.

Selrahc
2008-04-26, 03:00 AM
It doesn't. 40k is something of a guess. The empire doesn't use Earth years, instead taking 400 earth days as length of a year. Nobody knows how long humanity was in the dark age of technology, and its knowledge of history is broken.

For all we know it could be 450K or 12K.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-26, 06:51 AM
And here I thought that it was because it turned out that the Emperor's buddy died some 40,000 years ago and he fixed things so it would always work around his birth date.

:smallbiggrin:

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-26, 07:53 AM
It's only a matter of time intill we find the dark eldarcapital.

Well, for one the likelyhood of you getting into the Webway to even FIND it is rather unrealistic. And even if you do, while the Dark Eldar maybe a race of raiders, Commoragh holds the great bulk Dark Eldar. Its a huge city in the webway, and I don't really think Asdrubael Vect would take kindly to you invading his city. If the Nids do find Commoragh, they will learn its a mistake to anger Asdrubael Vect, ruler and founder of Commoragh, and the most powerful Dark Eldar alive.

puppyavenger
2008-04-26, 09:40 AM
Well, for one the likelyhood of you getting into the Webway to even FIND it is rather unrealistic. And even if you do, while the Dark Eldar maybe a race of raiders, Commoragh holds the great bulk Dark Eldar. Its a huge city in the webway, and I don't really think Asdrubael Vect would take kindly to you invading his city. If the Nids do find Commoragh, they will learn its a mistake to anger Asdrubael Vect, ruler and founder of Commoragh, and the most powerful Dark Eldar alive.

1. Commoragh is not in the webway
2. assuming a large fleet, we'll be outnumbering the entire dark-eldar race
3. Hive ships eat the atmospere, alterintivly, genestealers use there have-a-one-in-six-chance-of-killing-anything ability.
5. all the powerful dark eldar nedd hundreds of souls each day to survive, smash tthe fleet and keep them ocupied with the (souless) tyranids and they'll turn on eahcother.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-26, 09:55 AM
1. Commoragh (http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Commoragh) IS in the webway you fool, thats the whole POINT of it.
2. Maybe maybe not, remember the Dark Eldar are the remnants of the Eldar Empire. Most of it was destroyed but there's still hundreds of thousands if not millions lrgy. Not a lot on a galactic scale but still.
3. Again, webway, it has no atmosphere. And you have to catch them to kill them, the Dark Eldar won't let that happen, especially with the homefield advantage.
4. Well, Nids aren't soulless, their souls are just all part of the same Hive Mind. Individual Nids are soulless but still. And besides, its not like they don't have billions of prisoners, and they can just have their ships slip out of secrete parts of the webway if they need to.

Bryn
2008-04-26, 10:05 AM
1. Commoragh is not in the webway

Um, it is. (http://uk.games-workshop.com/darkeldar/torturer/2/)


"It seemed there was but one way of escaping Her and that was to flee their homes and leave the physical world behind forever. We came here, into the realm between worlds that we created to traverse the galaxy safe from harm. Here, the Great Enemy's grip is weakened, yet to our Lord's horror it was not wholly broken. He had bought his people time, a little instant of time but nothing more. Others followed him, each choosing a place for themselves, building new shrines and around them great palaces. Here, where you sit now, is one of the chambers of the original Temple of the Black Heart. You are very privileged, you know. Not many survive to get this far. Most of them break before they even reach the second level."

And further (http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Commorragh) citations (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commorragh#Commorragh). (I assume the people at Lexicanum are working from the Codex, and I would give you page numbers if I had it myself.

Not to say that the Tyranids aren't awesome, and they're a fantastic race to use in fluff (see the Anphelion Project for an example). Indeed, if a full Tyranid Hive Fleet was able to directly attack the Dark Eldar, they would (in my opinion) probably win. So far, though, there is no sign that the Tyranids have any way to enter the Webway and destroy the Dark Eldar.

puppyavenger
2008-04-26, 10:32 AM
Um, it is. (http://uk.games-workshop.com/darkeldar/torturer/2/)

.

oops, ah-well, We'll just have to wait intill we find a open webway gate.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-26, 11:00 AM
oops, ah-well, We'll just have to wait intill we find a open webway gate.

Well... Good luck stumbling around the galaxy till you starve. All the webway gates are either closed or hidden. You would need to look for the open ones, and you would need to know where they are. And even if you found one, its unlikely you'd be able to find Commoragh. The webway is an infinitely large space, and it requires an intricate knowledge of whats where to find your way around. Honestly, trying to find something in the webway while you don't know where it is, would be like trying to find a single grain of sand in a galaxy full of planets full of sand. You have no idea where to start, and no clue how to find your way around, and even if you DID stumble on to where you're supposed to start looking, theres no guarantee you won't just float by without noticing it.

Belteshazzar
2008-04-26, 03:53 PM
I wonder why he is so eager to embrace Tzeentch as the god of hope and change, when hope brings you nothing but hope? By such measures then Nurgal is the god of stability, family, and unity. Khorne is the god of strength, power, and courage. Slannesh then would be love, pleasure, and joy.

Simply because Tzeentch doesn't rape granneys, shove krak grenades down childrens throats, and has good hygene doesn't mean he is any better. He just has a more refined taste for wickedness. He is the awful powergamer in a group with a Rabid Hack n Slasher, Emo Vamp, and Fat Neckbeard.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-26, 04:10 PM
I wonder why he is so eager to embrace Tzeentch as the god of hope and change, when hope brings you nothing but hope? By such measures then Nurgal is the god of stability, family, and unity. Khorne is the god of strength, power, and courage. Slannesh then would be love, pleasure, and joy.

Simply because Tzeentch doesn't rape granneys, shove krak grenades down childrens throats, and has good hygene doesn't mean he is any better. He just has a more refined taste for wickedness. He is the awful powergamer in a group with a Rabid Hack n Slasher, Emo Vamp, and Fat Neckbeard.

More related /tg/ goodies:
(sage if you've seen this before)
http://img234.imageshack.us/img234/5334/1206585170334rn2.jpg

Bryn
2008-04-26, 05:36 PM
More related /tg/ goodies:
(sage if you've seen this before)


That's from a webcomic (http://www.secretlivesofmobs.com/index.php?strip_id=9), and not a bad one at that. Which seems to have come out of hiatus without me noticing :smallbiggrin:

SurlySeraph
2008-04-26, 06:03 PM
I wonder why he is so eager to embrace Tzeentch as the god of hope and change, when hope brings you nothing but hope? By such measures then Nurgal is the god of stability, family, and unity. Khorne is the god of strength, power, and courage. Slannesh then would be love, pleasure, and joy.

Simply because Tzeentch doesn't rape granneys, shove krak grenades down childrens throats, and has good hygene doesn't mean he is any better. He just has a more refined taste for wickedness. He is the awful powergamer in a group with a Rabid Hack n Slasher, Emo Vamp, and Fat Neckbeard.

Well, the great thing about 40K is that while all the factions have their unbelievably hideous aspects, all of them have their vaguely positive aspects. Tzeentch is the positive aspect of Chaos. Sure, he is either manipulating damn near everything that exists, making up everything for his followers as he goes along to make it look like he's manipulating everything, or just insane. But given how GRIMANDARK the universe is, change is decidedly a good thing.

I realize that I'll be challenged to provide positive aspects for the other factions. Very well.

The Imperium of Man: It's trying, in its scary genocidal way, to make the galaxy a safe place. Its citizens make up most of the population of the galaxy, and it's just trying to protect them. Besides, it's technically ruled by the most unambiguously positive entity in all of 40K, even if he screwed up and isn't really in control at all anymore.

The Tau: Yes, they're brainwashed space communist cows, but they're brainwashed space communist cows fighting for the Greater Good. And they really do do good things; they negotiate, they don't commit genocide, they try to expand without harming anyone else, and they only attack when provoked.

The Orks: They're just trying to have fun. They don't really hate anyone or want to destroy anything, they just like to fight for fun. While it's strange to say this about a race of murderous lunatics who have weapon schematics literally coded into their DNA, they're the most innocent faction in 40K.

The Dark Eldar: Yes, they're horrible soul-drinking torture addicts. But the horrible torture keeps Slaaneesh reasonably placated, more so than how the straight Eldar try to avoid and fight Slaaneesh whenever possible. Helping the incarnation of hedonism and sadism to gain strength isn't good, no, but it's better than angering Slaaneesh into raging unchecked.

The Eldar: They're incredibly arrogant paranoid nuts who will do anything if it'll give them some miniscule advantage later. But when your entire species has nearly been wiped out, doing everything you can to keep the survivors alive is quite reasonable. Besides, everything that increases the numbers of Eldar or helps them last longer increases the chances that they'll be able to destroy Slaaneesh, and that would definitely be a good thing for everyone. Yes, they'd rather let millions of humans die than let a few hundred of their own people die. But, frankly, Eldar lives are worth a lot more than human lives.

The Tyranids: OK, so they're a race of terrifying alien locusts that seem to consume everything they get near. But they're a race of scared alien locusts. We have no idea what they're fleeing from, but if it's enough to make the Tyranids seek refuge in a place as wartorn as the Milky Way, it must be bad. In any case, the advantages of being assimilated into a hivemind have been enumerated elsewhere. If the Tyranids win there will be no such thing as opinion or free will, but the life that remains will be incredibly powerful, at a pinnacle of evolution. They just want to make us better.

The Necrons: Oh boy. I'm not entirely sure how to defend a race of undead robots seeking to kill everything that lives so that they can feed sweet, sweet souls to mad star gods. At least, I'm not sure how to defend them without saying that they're by far the galaxy's best chance at holding back Chaos (by reducing access to the Warp) and the Tyranids (by being inedible). You can say their motivations were understandable: they didn't want to have their souls eaten by mad star gods. One thing that should be considered, though, is that the C'tan are endangered. They ate each other until there are only four left, and two of those are asleep. If the Deceiver and the Nightbringer are destroyed, the Necrons will have no reason to go on killing. As they are, the Necrons are horrible, but they provide a valuable service by holding Chaos back, and they wouldn't be horrible at all if their leaders just died.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-26, 06:23 PM
But the Tau are snuggly and cute! How can anyone hate them?!?

You missed the Inquisition though, especially the Witchfinders. And the REST of Chaos. You know. Nurgle an' Khorne an' Slaanesh.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-26, 06:42 PM
I wonder why he is so eager to embrace Tzeentch as the god of hope and change, when hope brings you nothing but hope? By such measures then Nurgal is the god of stability, family, and unity. Khorne is the god of strength, power, and courage. Slannesh then would be love, pleasure, and joy.

Simply because Tzeentch doesn't rape granneys, shove krak grenades down childrens throats, and has good hygene doesn't mean he is any better. He just has a more refined taste for wickedness. He is the awful powergamer in a group with a Rabid Hack n Slasher, Emo Vamp, and Fat Neckbeard.

Ummm... they ARE the gods of those things, they're just those things taken to the way extreme. And don't think there aren't good followers of the Chaos Gods. many people who live on secluded worlds worship the Chaos Gods in different forms, and most of them aren't evil.

Agrippa
2008-04-26, 11:34 PM
Well, the great thing about 40K is that while all the factions have their unbelievably hideous aspects, all of them have their vaguely positive aspects. Tzeentch is the positive aspect of Chaos. Sure, he is either manipulating damn near everything that exists, making up everything for his followers as he goes along to make it look like he's manipulating everything, or just insane. But given how GRIMANDARK the universe is, change is decidedly a good thing.

I realize that I'll be challenged to provide positive aspects for the other factions. Very well.

The Imperium of Man: It's trying, in its scary genocidal way, to make the galaxy a safe place. Its citizens make up most of the population of the galaxy, and it's just trying to protect them. Besides, it's technically ruled by the most unambiguously positive entity in all of 40K, even if he screwed up and isn't really in control at all anymore.

The Tau: Yes, they're brainwashed space communist cows, but they're brainwashed space communist cows fighting for the Greater Good. And they really do do good things; they negotiate, they don't commit genocide, they try to expand without harming anyone else, and they only attack when provoked.

The Orks: They're just trying to have fun. They don't really hate anyone or want to destroy anything, they just like to fight for fun. While it's strange to say this about a race of murderous lunatics who have weapon schematics literally coded into their DNA, they're the most innocent faction in 40K.

The Dark Eldar: Yes, they're horrible soul-drinking torture addicts. But the horrible torture keeps Slaaneesh reasonably placated, more so than how the straight Eldar try to avoid and fight Slaaneesh whenever possible. Helping the incarnation of hedonism and sadism to gain strength isn't good, no, but it's better than angering Slaaneesh into raging unchecked.

The Eldar: They're incredibly arrogant paranoid nuts who will do anything if it'll give them some miniscule advantage later. But when your entire species has nearly been wiped out, doing everything you can to keep the survivors alive is quite reasonable. Besides, everything that increases the numbers of Eldar or helps them last longer increases the chances that they'll be able to destroy Slaaneesh, and that would definitely be a good thing for everyone. Yes, they'd rather let millions of humans die than let a few hundred of their own people die. But, frankly, Eldar lives are worth a lot more than human lives.

The Tyranids: OK, so they're a race of terrifying alien locusts that seem to consume everything they get near. But they're a race of scared alien locusts. We have no idea what they're fleeing from, but if it's enough to make the Tyranids seek refuge in a place as wartorn as the Milky Way, it must be bad. In any case, the advantages of being assimilated into a hivemind have been enumerated elsewhere. If the Tyranids win there will be no such thing as opinion or free will, but the life that remains will be incredibly powerful, at a pinnacle of evolution. They just want to make us better.

The Necrons: Oh boy. I'm not entirely sure how to defend a race of undead robots seeking to kill everything that lives so that they can feed sweet, sweet souls to mad star gods. At least, I'm not sure how to defend them without saying that they're by far the galaxy's best chance at holding back Chaos (by reducing access to the Warp) and the Tyranids (by being inedible). You can say their motivations were understandable: they didn't want to have their souls eaten by mad star gods. One thing that should be considered, though, is that the C'tan are endangered. They ate each other until there are only four left, and two of those are asleep. If the Deceiver and the Nightbringer are destroyed, the Necrons will have no reason to go on killing. As they are, the Necrons are horrible, but they provide a valuable service by holding Chaos back, and they wouldn't be horrible at all if their leaders just died.

I've just posted this quote on Avatar Spirit.Net. You'd be surprised how many Warhammer 40k fans they have. There's a split on whether Azula would be a champion of Tzneetch or if she'd worm her way into the Adepta Sororitas Witch Hunters. You may or may not be interesed in that discussion (http://forums.avatarspirit.net/index.php?topic=12467.0).

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-27, 01:53 AM
I was just linked to this (http://www.dragonrealm.com/exlibrismortis/ExLibrisnewSistersArmy.html), and I had to share.

Solo
2008-04-27, 02:03 AM
I was just linked to this (http://www.dragonrealm.com/exlibrismortis/ExLibrisnewSistersArmy.html), and I had to share.

Your heretical and deviant mockeries of the glorious Sisters of Battle cannot hope to overcome the greatest weapon (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU) of the Imperium!

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-27, 02:20 AM
Your heretical and deviant mockeries of the glorious Sisters of Battle cannot hope to overcome the greatest weapon (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU) of the Imperium!

If that's the best the imperium can offer, you guys don't stand a chance.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-27, 02:22 AM
If that's the best the imperium can offer, you guys don't stand a chance.

I'm gonna presume you switched sides before you said this. It's the only way it makes sense.

Solo
2008-04-27, 02:37 AM
From the most Beneficent Immortal God-Emperor of Mankind, Master, Defender and Father of Mankind, Glory be to Him on Terra!

All rise for the morning devotional hymns.

And now, Inquisitor Solo presents:

"Have Faith in the Emperor, for He Shall Never Give You Up!"


Were no strangers to war
You know the rules and so do I
A full engagement's what I"m thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy

I just wanna tell you why I'm invading
Gotta make you understand

Never gonna give humanity up
Never gonna let it down
Never gonna run around and desert it
Never gonna let it die
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna let Chaos loose to hurt it

I've guided humanity for so long
Through time innumerable
Now here is no peace for it
We can see war's gonna go on
We know the game and were gonna play it

And if you ask me how I'm protecting
Don't tell me you're too blind to see

There is only war, only war
No peace among the stars,
Only and eternity
Of carnage and slaughter,
And the laughter, the laughter
Of thirsting, thirsting gods.

I just wanna tell you how I'm helping
Gotta make you understand

Never gonna give you up,
My child, humanity
Gonna kill the mutant
Gonna slay the xenos
Gonna burn the heretic
Never gonna let them go and hurt you

Gonna cleanse the heresy
Gonna crush the rebels
Gonna purge the unclean
Gonna make it save for you
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up!

tyckspoon
2008-04-27, 02:45 AM
Damnit, Solo. I'd just gotten over the last inappropriate crush.

Rutee
2008-04-27, 02:45 AM
I would laugh, Solo, but an Exalted game that played out a few hours ago Rick-rolled a Wedding. You pretty much got one upped before you had a chance.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-27, 08:24 AM
Damnation, and the Tau have yet to perfect their "Can't Touch This" crossinvention. Retreat my brothers! For the Greater Good!

Let the lolcats of the orks fight this truly heinous foe!

Solo
2008-04-27, 12:45 PM
"Thou Cans't Touch Thy Servant of the Most Holy Immortal God-Emperor of Mankind"

Can't touch this (x2)
Can't touch this (oh-oh oh oh oh-oh-oh) (x2)

My-my-my-my war hits me so hard makes me say oh Emperor
Thank you for blessing me with a gun to shoot and two krak 'nades
It feels good when you know you're down
The Space Marines will lead a crackdown
And I'm known as such
And this is a Man that you can't touch

I told you heretic you can't touch this
Yeah that's how we're fightin' and you know you can't touch this
Look in my eyes xenos filth, can't touch this
Now let me bust the det-packs out, you can't touch this

Fresh new gun and armor
You got it like that now you know you wanna fight
So move out of your seat
And finger the trigger and get off your feet
While it's rollin' hold on pump a little bit
And let me know it's going on like that like that
Cold on a mission so pull on back
Let 'em know that you're too much
And this is a Man that you can't touch

Yo I told you, can't touch this
Why you standing there traitor, you can't touch this
Sound the bells a crusade is in, sucker you can't touch this

Give me a bolter or chainsword
Making 'em sweat that's what I'm giving 'em
Now they know when you talk about the Emperor
You talk about a God that's hyped and hip
Brothers are sweatin' so pass them a clip
Or a 'nade to learn what it's gonna take
And now he's gonna burn
The purge's legit either work hard
Or you might as well quit

Faith shall be my shield
You can't touch this (oh-oh oh oh-oh-oh) (x2)
Break it down
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh-oh) (x4)
For the Emperor

Go with the flow in a spin if you can't move to this
Then you probably are dead
So wave your bolter in the air
Bust through the moves and kneel to praise our eternal warfare
This is it for the victor
Purge to this and you're gonna be a winner
Move slide your sword
Just for a minute let's praise our lord
Lord, lord, lord yeah

You can't touch this
Look xenos, you can't touch this
You'll probably get burned, heretic
'Cause you know you can't you can't touch this
Ring the bell cleansin's back in, break it down

When you see me you know the Emperor's my savior
I'm hell on Chaos and I'm magic in the war
Now why would I ever stop doing this
With others makin' wars that just don't hit
I toured around the galaxy from Terra to Cadia
For the Emperor, go Emperor
For the Emperor yo Emperor and the rest can go nova

Heretics can't touch this (oh-oh oh oh oh-oh-oh) (x2)
Xenos can't touch this (oh-oh oh-oh-oh)
Yeah Chaos can't touch this
I told you, can't touch this (oh-oh oh-oh-oh)
Too hype can't touch this
Get me outta here you can't touch this
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-27, 01:06 PM
Now, this is a story all about how
Mankind got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there,
I'll tell you how I became humanity's Immortal God-Emperor

In western Mesopotamia born and raised
Ruling Terra was how I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And using my psychic powers to strengthen my soul

When four or so warp gods who were up to no good
Startin' makin' trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one lil fight and Tzeentch got scared
He said 'We're movin' your Primarchs to the galaxy's every corner'

I called for a Crusade and when it became ready
The astropaths predicted the grim dark future
If anything they said there would only be war
But I thought 'Naw man forget it' - 'Yo homes to Istvaan!'

I pulled up to my Palace (couldn't have been just fate)
And I yelled to my Custodes 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at the Imperium, I was finally there
To sit on the Golden Throne as Mankind's Emperor.

Next up, on Scrib-O-Vision; 'Drop-pod rain; some stay pure and others feel the pain'.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-27, 02:47 PM
"SIR! His rhymes are too awesome! His chops are too rightous! Our ships can't take this level of awesome!"
"By the Greater Good, retreat and re-group!"

This means war. Eternal GRIMDARK WAR!

And bugger, I have work now. Expect my response soon enough. I'm not willing to give up that easy.

Solo
2008-04-27, 02:55 PM
Our chapter librarians can predict you every move, xenos filth! Behold, we predict in full your counter song!


Perhaps it will run something... like this?


Arise! ye starvelings, from your slumbers;
Arise! ye prisoners of want.
For reason in revolt now thunders
And ends at last the age of cant.
Away with all your superstitions
Servile masses, arise! arise!
We’ll change henceforth the old tradition
And spurn the dust to win the prize.

Chorus
So comrades, come rally
And the last fight, let us face.
The Greater Good
Unites the every race.

No saviour from on high delivers;
No faith have we in Emperor or Chaos.
Our own right hand the chains must shiver:
Chains of hatred, greed and fear.
E’er the other races will out ignorance
And give to all a happier lot.
Each at his forge must do his duty
And strike the iron while it’s hot!

GolemsVoice
2008-04-27, 03:18 PM
Now it's day and night the bolters bark
and like proud Space Marines
we toil and toil, and when we die
with honor fill our graves
And one bright day
when ev'rythng is silent on the field
we'l shoot those Xenos one and all
we'll gun the traitor down
we'll give the Warp a little shock
remember what I say
and they'll yet regret that with Marines
they joined this epic fray

Space Marines
-Traditional

Sisters we have heard on high
Drop-pods falling from the sky
While the traitors in reply
Their righteous punishment delay

Gloria, in excelsis Imperatoris

Guardsmen, why this jubilee?
Why the jouyous fight prolong?
Who the eternal saviour be
That we praise within this song?

Come to Terra all and see
The Emperor, of whom we sing
Come, adore on bended knee
The Emperor, eternal king

See him on His Golden Throne
Where he watches our praise
And like a guiding light he shone
While our weapons to war we raise

Sisters, We Have Heard on High
-Traditional Carrol sung be the Ecclesiarchy

Eita
2008-04-27, 08:09 PM
Surprisingly, I barely had to change this.

Mine eyes have seen the glory
Of the coming of Our Lord;
He is trampling on the heretics
and on all others he abhors;
He hath loosed the fateful lightning
Of His terrible swift sword;
His Astartes are marching on.

Chorus
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
His Astartes are marching on.

I have seen Him in the watchfires
Of a hundred circling camps
They have builded Him an altar
In the evening dews and damps;
I can read His righteous sentence
By the dim and flaring lamps;
His Astartes are marching on.

Chorus
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
His Astartes are marching on.

I have read a fiery gospel writ
In burnished rows of steel:
"As ye deal with My contemners,
So with you My grace shall deal":
Let the Heroes born of His flesh
Crush the heretics with His heel,
Since the God-Emperor is marching on.

Chorus
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
His Astartes are marching on.

He has sounded forth the trumpet
That shall never call retreat;
He is sifting out the hearts of men
Before His judgement seat;
Oh, be swift, my soul, to answer Him;
Be jubilant, my feet;
Our God-Emperor is marching on.

Chorus
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
His Astartes are marching on.

In the beauty of the lilies
He was born across the sea,
With a glory in His bosom
That transfigures you and me;
As He died to make men holy,
Let us die to make men free;
While the God-Emperor is marching on.

Chorus
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
His Astartes are marching on.

Battle Hymn of the Imperium
-Usually sung in Imperial Guardsmen camps. With assistance from the Commisar.

Solo
2008-04-27, 08:42 PM
Such a glorious outpouring of faith from our beloved Inquisitors shall surely beat back the armies of the heretics, xenos, and Chaos!

For lo, is it not said that a single man of faith can triumph over a legion of the faithless?

Brothers, you are to be commended for your efforts! Arise, and let us purge the galaxy of all those faithless that threaten our existence!

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-28, 02:42 AM
You know, I went to go look for some Heavy Metal Lyrics to adapt and I realized something.

I don't have to do a thing. They're already about the Chaos Gods.

Then I remembered. Chaos does as it pleases! Therefore I deliver a haiku written on the back of the skull of a guardsmen.

"Stupid ugly twerps
Gather around useless corpse
Many easy targets"

The Sandman
2008-04-28, 10:32 AM
It shall be done my Lord Inquisitor. The holy fires of the Emperor's Hand, the mighty Imperial Navy shall cleanse this world.

Exterminatus Totalus Immiediantus!

Death to the heretics! The righteous fury of the very foundries of Mars shall descend upon thee and smite thee! Thou shall know no respite, only a thousand years of torment for each heresy committed!

Wait, Mars? The one with the Void Dragon sleeping on it, being worshiped by the Adeptus Mechanicus? That Mars?

When your entire technological base isn't corrupted by a C'tan, come back and we'll talk.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-28, 11:43 PM
Oh you petty foolish humans, when you aren't being dominated and corrupted/influenced by one Godthing, you're being dominated and corrupted/influenced by another. When you will you finally give in and realize your existence is meaningless save to serve beings far greater than yourselves? Mankind and the sum of its parts are merely pawns to be used in the gods game of chess.

SurlySeraph
2008-04-29, 12:48 AM
My brother Inquisitors, those songs make me love you in ways that are probably heretical. Please put me in a Penitent Engine before Slaaneesh can slip into my mind.


Wait, Mars? The one with the Void Dragon sleeping on it, being worshiped by the Adeptus Mechanicus? That Mars?

When your entire technological base isn't corrupted by a C'tan, come back and we'll talk.

What makes you think it's corrupting us? We can enslave horrible star gods just as easily as they can enslave us, you know.


Oh you petty foolish humans, when you aren't being dominated and corrupted/influenced by one Godthing, you're being dominated and corrupted/influenced by another. When you will you finally give in and realize your existence is meaningless save to serve beings far greater than yourselves? Mankind and the sum of its parts are merely pawns to be used in the gods game of chess.

Our existence is meaningless except to serve The Emperor! And we will serve him and no one else!

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 12:51 AM
Our existence is meaningless except to serve The Emperor! And we will serve him and no one else!

So you say preything, so you say. Only time will tell if your resolve will hold, or if it will be enough to stem the tides of True Believers.

Solo
2008-04-29, 01:01 AM
For ten thousand years, your so called "True Believers" have fallen before the bolter and the chain sword.

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-29, 02:45 AM
For ten thousand years, your so called "True Believers" have fallen before the bolter and the chain sword.

As do yours.

Solo
2008-04-29, 02:55 AM
The difference being, you've been trying to take over the galaxy for about 10,000 years and have failed every time.

I'm buckling in my power armor. It's those bad guys that haven't made any net gains in ten thousand years!

Meanwhile, the Defenders of Humanity seem to have done their jobs ok.

puppyavenger
2008-04-29, 08:25 AM
[QUOTE=SurlySeraph;4258602]


What makes you think it's corrupting us? We can enslave horrible star gods just as easily as they can enslave us, you know.

QUOTE]

opkay, go to a tomb world and find the nightbringer, now inslave him. canyadoit? alternitivly, wake up the voiid dragon. anything that can slay the eldar pantheon must be inslavable by a civilisation who are barly maintaning the status quo.

Also where'd all this "Tyranids are running" fluff come from? As far as I remember it isn't in the new codex.

Bryn
2008-04-29, 10:39 AM
Also where'd all this "Tyranids are running" fluff come from? As far as I remember it isn't in the new codex.

I remember seeing a post here that claimed that the fact that the Tyranids are coming from another galaxy 'implied' that they're running. This has apparently been misinterpreted to say that they are running, rather than just being a (dubious) implication. Personally, I prefer to believe that the Tyranids ate everything worth eating in their previous galaxy and are now on their way here to continue the feast :smallbiggrin:

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-29, 10:45 AM
I remember seeing a post here that claimed that the fact that the Tyranids are coming from another galaxy 'implied' that they're running. This has apparently been misinterpreted to say that they are running, rather than just being a (dubious) implication. Personally, I prefer to believe that the Tyranids ate everything worth eating in their previous galaxy and are now on their way here to continue the feast :smallbiggrin:

They're running from the Angry Marines. Srsly.

Solo
2008-04-29, 12:20 PM
Fear the Angry Marines, for they come in two flavors: Pissed and Well Pissed.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-29, 12:42 PM
Fear the Angry Marines, for they come in two flavors: Pissed and Well Pissed.

A vile lie spread by the corrupting agents of Chaos. The Sons of Temperus Maximus know only one flavour:

f****** ANGRY! ALL THE TIME!

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 01:42 PM
They're just angry because they have yet to embrace the Greater Good. Or Khorne had his way with them.

Now that I think about it, Space Marines might be one of the saddest tales ever. Most of their leaders (Primarchs) were corrupted or killed in battle, they never really know what their doing, they're all ready to kill one another without much prompting. They have all these tales of honor and companionship, but that always fractures over time. They're misttrusted by most of humanity while still being held as heroes and the most they can hope for is that their chapter remembers them for a while. They all serve a dead guy too busy making sure the rest of the human race doesn't get gobbled up by Chaos to notice them. Sad Times.

As a side thing, is Khorne pronounced like "Corn?" I've been in an arguement about this with a chaos sympathizer for some time now, and would like to prove I'm right before cleansing him for the Greater Good.

Solo
2008-04-29, 01:54 PM
They're just angry because they have yet to embrace the Greater Good.

Or prescription medication, for that matter.




As a side thing, is Khorne pronounced like "Corn?" I've been in an arguement about this with a chaos sympathizer for some time now, and would like to prove I'm right before cleansing him for the Greater Good.

No need to debate the heretic. Just build catapults and launch baskets of corn over at them, shouting "Corn for the Corn God".

This will send them into a blind rage, but, after finding themselves unable to locate your position, they will take it out on their own troops, killing each other for you.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-29, 02:04 PM
http://img120.imageshack.us/img120/6883/1208578034916wo4.jpg

WE ANGRY MARINES HAVE NO NEED OF YOUR STUPID-ASS GREATER GOOD, FOOL.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-29, 02:06 PM
Or prescription medication, for that matter.

Finally, the secrets of the ethereals are revealed.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 03:50 PM
The difference being, you've been trying to take over the galaxy for about 10,000 years and have failed every time.

I'm buckling in my power armor. It's those bad guys that haven't made any net gains in ten thousand years!

Meanwhile, the Defenders of Humanity seem to have done their jobs ok.

HA! you don't wanna go there pal. We've made plenty of net gains, I mean how many more space marine legions do we have now because they defected from your pitiful Imperium? How many thousands of soldiers and slaves and servants have we gained from the ranks of mankind? How many sectors have you had to cross off the star maps and quarantine due to Chaos presence their? More than a few. And while we have been slowly making gains with our immortal lifespans, you have been slowly declining, your technology becoming more scarce, your worlds dying, your best slowly fading away. It is as if the whole of your Imperium is a grand gift to the Lord of Entropy, so far have you fallen. Like the subtle tendrils of the plans of Tzeentch, we shall wait and bide our time until the time comes to fruition that we are recognized as the True masters of humanity, for truly, have we not Immortal life spans with which to wait for your pathetic Imperium, beset as it is on all sides by those who would see your precious Imperium of Man burn and your people die, to slowly sink into decay and nothingness. We have all the time granted us by the True Masters, and what does your corpse god give you? He gives you borrowed time, and the day when that time shall be paid back with FULL interest is approaching. Mark my words mortal slime, your time will come, all it takes is patience.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-29, 03:59 PM
HA! you don't wanna go there pal. We've made plenty of net gains, I mean how many more space marine legions do we have now because they defected from your pitiful Imperium? How many thousands of soldiers and slaves and servants have we gained from the ranks of mankind? How many sectors have you had to cross off the star maps and quarantine due to Chaos presence their? More than a few. And while we have been slowly making gains with our immortal lifespans, you have been slowly declining, your technology becoming more scarce, your worlds dying, your best slowly fading away. It is as if the whole of your Imperium is a grand gift to the Lord of Entropy, so far have you fallen. Like the subtle tendrils of the plans of Tzeentch, we shall wait and bide our time until the time comes to fruition that we are recognized as the True masters of humanity, for truly, have we not Immortal life spans with which to wait for your pathetic Imperium, beset as it is on all sides by those who would see your precious Imperium of Man burn and your people die, to slowly sink into decay and nothingness. We have all the time granted us by the True Masters, and what does your corpse god give you? He gives you borrowed time, and the day when that time shall be paid back with FULL interest is approaching. Mark my words mortal slime, your time will come, all it takes is patience.

But...

What have you actually done? "Waiting till you die" is considerably less than cool and being immortal doesn't mean you can't get shot.

Also, why can't the daemon primarchs be assed with doing anything anymore?

Callos_DeTerran
2008-04-29, 04:07 PM
I remember seeing a post here that claimed that the fact that the Tyranids are coming from another galaxy 'implied' that they're running. This has apparently been misinterpreted to say that they are running, rather than just being a (dubious) implication. Personally, I prefer to believe that the Tyranids ate everything worth eating in their previous galaxy and are now on their way here to continue the feast :smallbiggrin:

The Hive Mind approves of this message and reasoning! The devouring of your valued genetic material shall occur slightly later then the other biologicals on your miserable ignorant world.



Wait...what now? I just blacked out for a second.....Dang it...I seem to have eaten one of my pets again..

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 04:07 PM
Did you miss the part about conquering whole sectors? Because I thought I mentioned conquering whole sectors. And who the hell cares how cool it is, I mean its not like were not helping it along by killing you, and besides it doesn't need to be cool when you're all DEAD. And no, being immortal doesn't mean you cant get shot, it does however mean you've been around so long you know how to kill people and stay alive really well. And honestly Daemon Primarchs are DAEMONS. They're FULLY immortal, its not that can't be assed to do anything, they just don't see time like you mortals do. They know how to bide their time, they aren't just going to all attack at different times, they'll all attack at the next Black Crusade, and even if you push it back, it will cost you greatly.

Solo
2008-04-29, 04:21 PM
So Chaos plans to win in the same manner as the Giamonk.

By waiting for the enemy to die of old age.

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-29, 04:24 PM
Pun-pun Star Child and Batman Y'nnead coming right up ...

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 04:25 PM
No, we plan on attacking you at different times over thousands of years because we're immortal and you aren't. We can afford to wait thousands of years and striking when we see an opening, you don't have the luxury of time to build up proper defenses to block us from destroying you, all you can do is defend the best you can while everyone else tries to kill you. That is why you are all just preythings.

Solo
2008-04-29, 04:26 PM
No, we plan on attacking you at different times over thousands of years because we're immortal and you aren't. We can afford to wait thousands of years and striking when we see an opening, you don't have the luxury of time to build up proper defenses to block us from destroying you, all you can do is defend the best you can while everyone else tries to kill you. That is why you are all just preythings.

In other words, yes.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-29, 04:27 PM
It's just....

It's just not GRIMDARK enough...

*sob*

Illiterate Scribe
2008-04-29, 04:30 PM
It's just....

It's just not GRIMDARK enough...

*sob*

Put some more spikes, skulls, candles and grime on it and it will be.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 04:30 PM
In other words, yes.

Don't put words in my mouth pitiful whelp. Mind your betters.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 04:33 PM
Did you miss the part about conquering whole sectors? Because I thought I mentioned conquering whole sectors. And who the hell cares how cool it is, I mean its not like were not helping it along by killing you, and besides it doesn't need to be cool when you're all DEAD. And no, being immortal doesn't mean you cant get shot, it does however mean you've been around so long you know how to kill people and stay alive really well. And honestly Daemon Primarchs are DAEMONS. They're FULLY immortal, its not that can't be assed to do anything, they just don't see time like you mortals do. They know how to bide their time, they aren't just going to all attack at different times, they'll all attack at the next Black Crusade, and even if you push it back, it will cost you greatly.

Out of curiosity, and more as a Fio'la then a Shas'el, what of the two beings called 'Gork' and 'Mork' by the Be'gel? Our studies into your Immarterium are lacking, but we have heard of these. Why are they still there if you hold such great power within the Warp?

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 04:37 PM
Its doubtful if Gork and Mork even exist within the Warp or exist at all. Its possible they merely represent the WAAAGHH! itself, although its possible they exist, they would certainly exist due to the WAAAAGHH!! itself, and if they have any presence in the warp, it is directly tied to this fundamental Orkish energy. So basically, not out jurisdiction. We aren't orks, we can't do much about it.

Myshlaevsky
2008-04-29, 04:38 PM
"Wait for you to die?"

"Out of jurisdiction?"

This is CHAOS we're talking about, right?

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 04:44 PM
1. Stop taking my words out of context and putting words into my mouth instead of reading what I say and 2. Since they aren't really warp entities like Daemons, and we aren't even sure if they exist, and if they do they exist in a way that only orks can tap into their power, then yes, not being orks, its OUT OF OUR JURISDICTION. Unless you want to take orkish blood transfusions to see if they're real, I suggest you watch your tongue.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 05:32 PM
It was of our belief that your Immarterium is based mainly upon emotion, as well as a reflection of our own material world. The Vash'aun'an, as we call it, would harbor this Gork and Mork, unless our studies have been wrong. Rather, I have brought a Vespid Strain Leader who has studied them extensively to put forth his question.

"Chirp chirp chirp cheep chirp cheep cheep bzzzz chirp cheep cheep?"

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 05:58 PM
Well, the Orks appear to be singularly unique in this case. While it is true for most races that their emotions become manifest in the Warp, the Orks seem to project their own warp-field, fueled by their laten psyker powers, this is known as the WAAAAGHH! It is unknown if the WAAAGHHH! is an energy all its own or if, like we theorize the Eldar webway may be, it is both of the warp, and not. And I know many languages, including several variations of Warp-tongue and Daemon speak which should be unspeakable by a non warp-denizen, but I still can't understand what the 7 Hells of Warplore he's saying.

Selrahc
2008-04-29, 06:14 PM
Also, why can't the daemon primarchs be assed with doing anything anymore?

Angron is banished, Night Haunter is dead, Fulgrim is dead, Alpharius is dead, Horus is dead, Magnus is studying, Mortarion is lazy, and Perturabo and Lorgar are both in the rather passive role of "Overseers".

Lorgar and Perturabo do actually do things though, its just they don't have much incentive to try particularly hard. They're already god, with nigh infinite power over their own realms.

Solo
2008-04-29, 07:42 PM
Don't put words in my mouth pitiful whelp. Mind your betters.

5 stages, man, 5 stages.

So far, you are at denial and anger.

Soon, you shall reach acceptance, acceptance of the fact that Chaos is no better than the Giamonk, and with acceptance, you will be able to start on the road to solving the problem.

I know it's hard to admit that Chaos is so pathetic, but I shall be here for you to see you though this crisis of faith, and I want you to know you can count on me to help.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 07:48 PM
5 stages, man, 5 stages.

So far, you are at denial and anger.

Soon, you shall reach acceptance, acceptance of the fact that Chaos is no better than the Giamonk, and with acceptance, you will be able to start on the road to solving the problem.

I know it's hard to admit that Chaos is so pathetic, but I shall be here for you to see you though this crisis of faith, and I want you to know you can count on me to help.

Ha, you're already at the delusional stage. Quiet preything, lest you meddle in affairs not your own, and incite the wrath of beings greater even then I. Besides, as a servant of the Blood God among others, Anger and Rage are constant states of mind.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 08:05 PM
I love how we can all come together to hate the guts of everyone!

Ralfarius
2008-04-29, 08:15 PM
And from the peanut gallery: 'OM NOM NOM NOM NOM.'
*Attracted by the emanations of impending feeding, emerges from the landed mycetic spore, beginning the process of converting this planet's biomass into a digestible state for the hive fleet.*

chiasaur11
2008-04-29, 08:17 PM
5 stages, man, 5 stages.

So far, you are at denial and anger.

Soon, you shall reach acceptance, acceptance of the fact that Chaos is no better than the Giamonk, and with acceptance, you will be able to start on the road to solving the problem.

I know it's hard to admit that Chaos is so pathetic, but I shall be here for you to see you though this crisis of faith, and I want you to know you can count on me to help.

Does the "help" involve continual laser fire while the Glorious Emperor of Mankind's anthem plays loudly and repeatedly? If so, can I watch? It would educate the masses about the dangers of chaos worship.

Callos_DeTerran
2008-04-29, 08:18 PM
I love how we can all come together to hate the guts of everyone!

*A carnifex and necron land stand claw-in-rusty-metallic hand as carnifex starts 'singing' and swaying* EEEssssshhh KKAaaaaaalck Scccrreee baaarrr SCraawww?! *Necron lord picks up with next line.* Why can't organic beings die?

Solo
2008-04-29, 08:31 PM
Ha, you're already at the delusional stage. Quiet preything, lest you meddle in affairs not your own, and incite the wrath of beings greater even then I. Besides, as a servant of the Blood God among others, Anger and Rage are constant states of mind.

The Kübler-Ross model describes, in five discrete stages, the process by which people deal with grief and tragedy, especially when diagnosed with a terminal illness. The model was introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book "On Death and Dying". The stages have become well-known as the "Five Stages of Grief".

The stages are:

1. Denial: "It can't be happening."
2. Anger: "Why me? It's not fair."
3. Bargaining: "Just let me live to see my children graduate."
4. Depression: "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"
5. Acceptance: "It's going to be OK."

Kübler-Ross originally applied these stages to any form of catastrophic personal loss (job, income, freedom, startling revaluations that your beloved Chaos Gods are infact pansies). This also includes the death of a loved one, divorce, drug addiction, or infertility. Kübler-Ross also claimed these steps do not necessarily come in the order noted above, nor are all steps experienced by all patients, though she stated a person will always experience at least two.

You'll note that delusion isn't one of the stages.

In short: "u r wrong!"

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 08:49 PM
Oh, so you're just a crazy moron. I see, thanks for clearing that up... delusional freak, makes us look sane

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 08:51 PM
Wow, that was one of the more severe cases of ownage I've seen in a while. At least since the Tau Empire was Emperor-Rolled.

I think this calls for another battle, or another round of odd debate about something awesome. Like which is more badass, Crisis V8 suits or Dreadnoughts?

comicshorse
2008-04-29, 09:00 PM
Didn't Ahriman just reduce the Cadian gate to smoking rubble. Pretty much destroying the Empire's best defence ?

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 09:01 PM
I wasn't aware that there was a stage of ad homonem attacks. I shall inform Kübler and Ross of this at once.

And I wasn't aware actively trying to sound like an ******* was part of this thread. I thought that at this point, the purpose was to be silly and have fun, but just FYI, if thats the point, you aren't. You're honestly coming off as a jerk, and its kinda getting to me.

Solo
2008-04-29, 09:06 PM
Didn't Ahriman just reduce the Cadian gate to smoking rubble. Pretty much destroying the Empire's best defence ?

Chaos won in that they broke through, but that Cadia still stands and the Imperium is still holding the Chaos legions back.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 09:14 PM
My apologies for being a jerk and making you read this thread and witness my jerky comments.

I shall relinquish control of your mind at once and let you not read my comments so that you may not be "gotten at".

Yea see, I can't honestly tell if you're trying to be a prick or not, but you're coming off the wrong way. I mean, god forbid I come here to discuss things and get responded to by you. I'm sorry you don't seem to be able to grasp the concept of "good natured ribbing" as opposed to "jamming your elbow in someones ****ing ribs"

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 09:22 PM
You're made the mistake of assuming I'm doing this for your benefit as well as my own.:smalltongue:

... Just stop talking to me...

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 09:28 PM
It would be prudent for you to think it over a couple of times next time you try "good natured ribbing" . Next time you try to be funny, it would be nice if you realized that its probably not for anyone but you.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 09:31 PM
Another few more posts and then the two enemies shall fight, leaving the eastern edge free to be taken into the warm embrace of the Tau Empire. Excellent...

Solo
2008-04-29, 09:33 PM
Another few more posts and then the two enemies shall fight, leaving the eastern edge free to be taken into the warm embrace of the Tau Empire. Excellent...

Foolish xenos! You fail to remember that the Eastern fringe has the Imperial Guard to protect it! Have you forgotten so quickly the might of the Guard?

You know as well as I that there are two crucial advantages the Guard has over your xenos armies.

1. There are always more Guardsmen

2. There are always more Guardsmen

comicshorse
2008-04-29, 09:44 PM
" Sacrificing minions is there any problem it CAN'T solve"

You know that sounds familiar

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 09:48 PM
You would fight us as the tendrils of the Y'he themselves bear down and choke your precious Imperium? There are few enemies in this universe that we have come to find, and the Y'he, the Great Devourer, is the most likely to bring a return of the Mont'au! None of us shall be able to stand against the Y'he if we fight amongst one another without end. Our protection can allow these worlds to survive their onslaught, and you would throw them to the jaws of an unfeeling beast.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-04-29, 09:48 PM
" Sacrificing minions is there any problem it CAN'T solve"

You know that sounds familiar
Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what is right. We are indeed slaughtering our men, but that does not mean we don't care. Their souls are gathered unto the Emperor's own bosom, and their sacrifice preserves humanity as a light in the dark of the universe.

Solo
2008-04-29, 09:49 PM
" Sacrificing minions is there any problem it CAN'T solve"

You know that sounds familiar

We sacrifice our own, but never fail to honor the sacrifice. Thus we are strong, since for all those that die, the remainder become more determined to win, for the sake of the fallen.

Consider now, would it be better for a man to meet his death at home at the hands of invading xenos, or honorable on the field of battle, protecting his wife, his family, his planet, the Imperium, and the Emperor?

Clearly, better to die in the defense of all you love than to watch it be destroyed at the hands of invaders.

Thus is it ethical and sound to make sacrifices in order to assure further victories for the Imperium.

Praise the Emperor!

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 09:53 PM
" Sacrificing minions is there any problem it CAN'T solve"

Barbarians! Why do you send your men to their doom? Each is a life that is taken with no need. Each could be used to service the Greater good, but you dash them against the rocks until they break and run slick with their blood. Would you become so animalistic to forget your fellow being? Or have you come too far down the path of damnation to turn back?

Solo
2008-04-29, 09:59 PM
Barbarians! Why do you send your men to their doom? Each is a life that is taken with no need. Each could be used to service the Greater good, but you dash them against the rocks until they break and run slick with their blood. Would you become so animalistic to forget your fellow being? Or have you come too far down the path of damnation to turn back?

Xenos such as you could not hope to understand the glory that comes from being the first to die on the field of battle for Emperor, for no man who dies in His name dies in vain!

He who falls on the field of battle is become a maytr to the Imperium, and the ground soaked with his blood becomes consecrated, hallowed beyond the ability of even the mightiest members of the Ecclesiarchy.

Though the death of Guardsmen are Ork WAAAAGH!s brought to a halt, entire worlds liberated from Chaos, and the Ruinous Powers held at bay.

Death is truly the greatest honor that can come to a Guardsmen. It is a great benefit to us that you Tau cannot understand the magnitude of such self sacrifice for being incapable of it makes you all the easier to dispatch.

And if you find it do barbaric for our men to die, why do you shoot them? We may field vast armies, but it is your guns, not ours, that expand the casualty lists.

comicshorse
2008-04-29, 10:03 PM
Though the death of Guardsmen are Ork WAAAAGH!s brought to a halt, entire worlds liberated from Chaos, and the Ruinous Powers held at bay.

Aren't any Gaurdsmen who fight Chaos executed afterwards to prevent the knowledge getting out:smallsmile:

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 10:10 PM
You hide your words and twist them to suit your own needs. Minds such as yours are little better then that of the Y'he! You would throw so many of your own Gue'vsa so that your enemy would run out of ammunition! Even the Be'gel are better then you in this respect. At least they do not waste their shas'la merely to send them to their death.

I have fought your Imperial Guard. I have seen many honorable men die when they could have lived for so much longer. They could have done so much more then fall before our line. I have seen your own officers execute men for being out of uniform to have camouflage. I have seen hundreds of tactics fall and break, and yet your shas'o never altered his strategy to save men. I have tried to reason with your soldiers, and yet they are more afraid of their superiors then of my Hammerhead tank. I have talked with them, I have reasoned. I use Guse'vesa in my own cadre. They are well trained men. More disciplined and brave then any Be'gel, yet you kill them off, considering a slaughter to be acceptable losses to take a city half destroyed.

All of this to destroy our home and the home of the Gue'la that are with us.

The Greater Good has a place for beings such as these, but I weep for your future if your view of your own man does not change.

Solo
2008-04-29, 10:17 PM
It is for your future, not mine, that you should weep, for the vengeance of the Emperor shall soon arrive, and He shall soon lay His most Holy smack down on you!


Aren't any Gaurdsmen who fight Chaos executed afterwards to prevent the knowledge getting out:smallsmile:

Actually, the ones who get executed are the ones who failed their sanity saves.

Tola
2008-04-29, 10:19 PM
I thought it was usually brainwiping? And frankly, anyone who's dealt with Chaos in battle would be glad of it. Chaos tends to go for the 'Lovecraftian horror' angle with....well, everything.

You NEVER see a nice-looking Chaos world, EVER. You'd think Slannesh at least would take more care to make his worlds look beautiful, but....

Even the NECRONS make their structures and architecture look awe-inspiring. They may kill you, but at least the place will look cool afterwards.

....I would like to be proved wrong.

Solo
2008-04-29, 10:23 PM
Even the NECRONS make their structures and architecture look awe-inspiring. They may kill you, but at least the place will look cool afterwards.


And then we come in, wipe the Necrons off the face of the planet, and claim their condos as our own.

Lord_Asmodeus
2008-04-29, 10:24 PM
http://us.games-workshop.com/games/40k/chaosspacemarines/terrain/daemonworlds/images/daemonworld_sepia.jpg
Word Bearers

http://mythicmktg.fileburst.com/war/us/media/newsletter/2007_05/BastionStair03.jpg

Chaos Fortress.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 10:25 PM
We have pretty buildings. They're rounded, and are comfy. For EVERYONE to enjoy! :3

And on the serious note.

Our studies into your culture, as well as your Emperor have led us to this conclusion. Should he ever decide to strike those who you say he would down, then the Chaos you all so fear would overwhelm in that moment. Would you destroy your whole race for a personal vendetta? There was a Gue'la we know of who almost did, once. Would you wish to repeat that?

Solo
2008-04-29, 10:30 PM
We have pretty buildings. They're rounded, and are comfy. For EVERYONE to enjoy! :3

And on the serious note.

Our studies into your culture, as well as your Emperor have led us to this conclusion. Should he ever decide to strike those who you say he would down, then the Chaos you all so fear would overwhelm in that moment. Would you destroy your whole race for a personal vendetta? There was a Gue'la we know of who almost did, once. Would you wish to repeat that?

Well, I suppose that last paragraph could have been more vague...

People the Emperor wishes to smack down:

Orks
Necron
Chaos
Dark Eldar (And sometimes Eldar)
Tyranids
Heretics
Rebels
Xenos (Misc)

I fail to see how striking down any/all of the above would cause Chaos to win.

Heck, destroying Chaos would cause them to lose, for that is what happens when you are destroyed.

Naive xenos filth, you make the mistake of thinking that peace can be obtained in this galaxy, but mark my words: There shall be no peace among the stars, for there is only WAR!

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-29, 10:34 PM
Probably, but your language is tough, and I am merely a Shas'el. I would need a Por'La to truly debate this with you.

EDIT: Your blasted edits annoy me. Also, It is taken from the theory that your Emperor is the only thing stopping Chaos from truly coming, as well as providing guidance for your ships. Even for several rota, what would happen if suddenly everything was lost, and unable to find their way around?

Solo
2008-04-29, 10:36 PM
http://us.games-workshop.com/games/40k/chaosspacemarines/terrain/daemonworlds/images/daemonworld_sepia.jpg

Your GRIMDARK spikes with GRIMDARK skulls lack GRIMDARK banners attached to the spikes.

GRIMDARK banners of skulls mounted on spikes.

SurlySeraph
2008-04-29, 10:56 PM
Oh, Chaos won't overwhelm us. We can beat them, we can beat everyone! At least, that's what the Comissar says. I trust him.

'Course, Chaos is rather tempting. They're going for a "kinder and gentler" image now, you know.

Unsuspecting comrades hear warnings, hear signs.
Freedom's day Chaos's coming arrives.
Turn from the Emperor or else die.

Forgotten children, conform a new faith,
Hope entropy and lust alongside hate.
Never trust the corpse god, join us and be free
Souls of Damnation in your own reality.

Chaos rampant,
No need for distrust.
Come and join us.
It will be worth it.

Khorne's sons protect your Slaaneeshi daughters,
Succubus mothers along with Nurgle our father.
Your souls will be safe for eternity,
In the reliable embrace of an everchanging deity.

Chaos rampant,
No need for distrust.
Come and join us.
It will be worth it.

On and on, south of heaven

The root of all evil is the heart of a black soul.

A corpse on his throne all eternity.
A false Inquisition that hides truth never told.
The loss of all hope and your dignity.

Chaos rampant,
No need for distrust.
Come and join us.
It will be worth it.

On and on, south of heaven

Solo
2008-04-29, 11:02 PM
Oh, Chaos won't overwhelm us. We can beat them, we can beat everyone!

Except your spouses and children. That would be against regulations.

Callos_DeTerran
2008-04-29, 11:17 PM
And then we come in, wipe the Necrons off the face of the planet, and claim their condos as our own.

And how well has that worked out organic excrement? See it's the naive faith and foolhardy bravery that really adds the flavor your souls and biomass. :smallamused:

Solo
2008-04-29, 11:20 PM
And how well has that worked out organic excrement? See it's the naive faith and foolhardy bravery that really adds the flavor your souls and biomass. :smallamused:

Bring it, rust bucket. We have Windows Vista.

Callos_DeTerran
2008-04-29, 11:22 PM
Bring it, rust bucket. We have Windows Vista.

And we have faster and unlimited internet access. Can your vaunted Imperial Guard and Marines stand against the corruption and horrors of places like 4chan? Your own commisars will defeat you before the Deceiver even need deceive.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-04-29, 11:24 PM
And we have faster and unlimited internet access. Can your vaunted Imperial Guard and Marines stand against the corruption and horrors of places like 4chan? Your own commisars will defeat you before the Deceiver even need deceive.Back off, I have a TinyURL address and I'm not afraid to use it.

Solo
2008-04-29, 11:26 PM
And we have faster and unlimited internet access. Can your vaunted Imperial Guard and Marines stand against the corruption and horrors of places like 4chan? Your own commisars will defeat you before the Deceiver even need deceive.

The Guard have trillions of men, each with his own Internet connection, each able to Emperor-roll you and/or hit "Refresh" while locked on 4chan to carry out a DOS attack and melt down the server.

tyckspoon
2008-04-29, 11:37 PM
Your GRIMDARK spikes with GRIMDARK skills lack GRIMDARK banners attached to the spikes.

GRIMDARK banners of skulls mounted on spikes.

Gah! Because I've been following the PA Dwarf Fortress thread..

"The Fearful Cathedral, a GRIMDARK sword. This is a GRIMDARK sword. All craftmanship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with GRIMDARK, decorated with GRIMDARK, and wrapped in GRIMDARK leather. This object menaces with spikes of GRIMDARK. On the item are images of Imperial Guardsmen in GRIMDARK.

This item bears images of:

An Imperial Guardsman. A Commisar stands near him.
An Imperial Guardsman. He lays dead on the ground. One bolt shell is near his head.
Imperial Guardsmen, all carrying lasguns. They do nothing.
A banner. It bears the image of The Fearful Cathedral."

Xuincherguixe
2008-04-30, 01:50 AM
What saddens me the most about the imperium is that in their ignorance they sap the joy out of slaughtering them.

It makes you weak, and easy prey.

When the battlefield changes, your tactics fail to. And you proceed to drown in your blood.

Even the Orks seem to act in more intelligent fashion.

You claim to be the defenders of humanity, but in a fitting fashion for those obsessed with a corpse all you do is rot and decay.


Only through chaos can man be saved. Only chaos allows one to be as they are. Even when the warp blesses and improves them. Stronger, Smarter, and more in tune with reality. You call it insanity, but you are far too tiny to judge anything.


I only pray that the Tau don't die too quickly. When they burn, they at least give off light. The imperiums citizens only leave the same darkness that was there a moment ago.

ArtifexFelicis
2008-04-30, 05:49 AM
Wait, if we shove the Necrons offa their planet, then what would happen to the Condos? Or would they even have bathrooms?

Or do they metabolize all their food at 100% GRIMDARK efficiency?

Ralfarius
2008-04-30, 09:53 AM
*The gaunts come in an unending tide, choking the local fauna with their numbers. Even the shrieks of the planetary creatures are drowned out by the unstoppable cacophony of trampling chitin and muscle. In the distance, a massive Carnifex opens a metal obstruction, crushing the soft biomass within to an easily digested pulp. Spore mines drift lazily across the landscape, the wind currents drawing them towards a huddled mass of warm-blooded creatures. Tiny rippers wriggle amongst the clashing tide, gorging themselves on life forms both warm and cold. The setting of one sun casts long shadows over the dimming continent, capillary towers looming.*

Callos_DeTerran
2008-04-30, 10:17 AM
The Guard have trillions of men, each with his own Internet connection, each able to Emperor-roll you and/or hit "Refresh" while locked on 4chan to carry out a DOS attack and melt down the server.

Yeeesss and while your 'trillions' of Guard launch their DOS assault the Necron forces shall be perfecting the Invisible Christopher Walken dance. Yes, we'd go that far.

Eita
2008-04-30, 08:55 PM
And then we come in, wipe the Necrons off the face of the planet, and claim their condos as our own.

Real estate for the real estate god!

ArtifexFelicis
2008-05-01, 05:29 AM
Mortgage for the Mortgage Throne!