Date (Idea) Thread!

[SadisticFishing]

Alrighty, well, you know, right before something turns into a relationship, there's that awkward "What do we do?" phase? Well I may be in that phase now, and though there are tons of questions to ask, this one seems like it could make a good thread.

What sort of things make good dates?

First dates especially.

I have virtually no ideas.

[Madmal]

there's already a fair share of threads that cover this, like the "relationship woes and advice" one.

[SadisticFishing]

That's a much bigger topic. This is about ideas for dates, not how to deal with your ex-girlfriend and your new girlfriend hooking up or something (note, this is not meant to be an insult/mockery :P)

[dish]

Date ideas will vary according to how old you are, where you live, and the weather/season.

Ok, so:
- dinner in a nice romantic charming restaurant?
- go to a movie / film. Possibly a scarey one (so there are excuses for holding hands).
- a walk in the park to feed the ducks / view the cherry blossom (helps if it is spring) / view the autumnal leaves (helps if it is autumn).
- in the height of summer how about a date at an open-air swimming pool?
- climb up your nearest hill and explore the tower at the top (good views)?
- go to a museum.
- If you can dance - go to a salsa night.
- an ice-cream parlour to try out as many different flavours as possible.
- if you live in a city with lots of street theatre go on a quest to view as many performances as possible.
- go to an art gallery and criticise the paintings together.
- window shopping in the most expensive shops in your town.

[Vuzzmop]

I do understand this point; the thread isn't about relationships, but about what needs to happen beforehand.

Dinner and a movie is good, if you can afford it. Or maybe take them somwhere quiet and hands on, like a pottery class, just like that movie, "Ghost", except that you won't be dead, which is a bonus.
What sort of price range are we talking about here?

[rubakhin]

Dude.

You live in Montreal. That place is huge. You'll figure something out.

Just going for long walks is nice, whether there's park, or nature, or just an interesting part of the city that you can look at. Plus, there's not much to distract you, you're forced to make conversation and bond. Ideal!

[SadisticFishing]

I suppose, though specific-ish, this isn't specific enough.

Personally, I'm looking for a first date idea for me and a girl who I met online, who lives near me, who I haven't met yet IRL, but we should at some point this week and I feel confident our online... "connection"-thing will transfer over. And if it does, I want to ask her out in some way or another, and I need first date ideas. Also, a way to ask her out - normally I just tell a girl I'm interested, but that's never really had the sort of romantic spunk I'm *supposed* to have. Yeah.

Well, price range, I don't particularly care about. But it IS a first date.

Pottery class seems like a much later phase of dating, though it may just be me...

Haha, yeah, Montreal is pretty big, and that might be part of the problem. I don't just have a "first date" place that everyone uses, like dinner and a movie. Too many damn options.

[SoD]

I do understand this point; the thread isn't about relationships, but about what needs to happen beforehand.

Dinner and a movie is good, if you can afford it. Or maybe take them somwhere quiet and hands on, like a pottery class, just like that movie, "Ghost", except that you won't be dead, which is a bonus.
What sort of price range are we talking about here?

On the subject of first dates, not being dead is a bonus...that's got to be the understatement of the year!

How about a midnight picnic? Picnic under moonlight, I think it sounds nice.

[randman22222]

Do you know how to sail? Find a lake or something where you can rent sailboats and sail.

Don't know how? You and the dame go take lessons together.

[Totally Guy]

Ice skating is a good one. I did that on valentines day but she hadn't told me she'd hurt her leg earlier that day so I only found out after I'd paid.

Also the pub is good. You can sit face to face and talk.

Crazy golf. Didn't to that one.

Fly a kite. I have a ship shape pirate ship shaped kite.

[dish]

Starting a new activity together is a great one...
See if anyone is offering a free trial class in an activity you're interested in - kickboxing, yoga, acting, painting, whatever.

[Thes Hunter]

Bowling
Beach
Hiking
Canoeing
bik ride
chess game
board game
local free outdoor concert
anything you have common interests in


I don't see how it should be that hard to find something to do. But then again that's probably just me.

[averagejoe]

Alrighty, well, you know, right before something turns into a relationship, there's that awkward "What do we do?" phase? Well I may be in that phase now, and though there are tons of questions to ask, this one seems like it could make a good thread.

Gosh, now that you put it like that, it seems like my life has been one whole "What do we do?" phase. Not just in relationships either.

As a fan of communication, I tend to think that it's a good idea to talk to the other party about it beforehand; they might have ideas, dislikes or preferences. It's safer, though maybe not as flashy, as suprising them. There are advantages to both.

I've always been a fan of renting a movie that both of you both like and have already seen. Then you can feel free to talk over it, and during the awkward silence bits you can pretend to be interested in the movie to make things less awkward.

I too have always been a fan of walks. Not just for dates either, but in general. If you go this route it tends to be a good idea to have a place where you can just sit for a good stretch.

[Bor the Barbarian Monk]

Personally, I've always thought dinner and/or a movie was a terrible idea for a first date. Either you're too busy eating and being selfconscious about food getting stuck between your teeth or you're sitting in absolute silence while watching a movie.

I've always been a fan of the "walking date," but it sometimes results in a search for conversation. Thus, I suggest going for a walk somewhere interesting. The easiest and most inexpensive place to go would be a mall, which has multiple advantages.

1. You're metting a girl from the net, so it's safer for both of you to meet in a public place.

2. There's a difference between shopping and buying. You can shop for something all day and never buy a thing. So don't make it a shopping excursion, but a social exercise.

3. There's a lot of material at a mall to discuss, from strange things displayed in windows to strange humans wandering the mall. Lots of topics to cover when and if your mind goes blank.

4. Just one down side. Lots of pretty females wandering the mall. If you're going to be on a date, have eyes only for your date. Romance tends to come to a rapid end when you spend too much time staring at another female's assets. :smallwink:

[happyturtle]

Movies are terrible for first dates. You can't talk during the movie, and afterwards, you only talk about the movie. Bo-ring.

You want something physical: paddleboat rides, hiking, canoeing, mini-golf.... activities that provide a built in topic of conversation as well as excuses to touch. Go to a playground and push her on the swings and climb the monkey-bars together. Play paintball. Ride rollercoasters.

If a meal is involved, a picnic is better than a restaurant. Make sure to scout out places with picnic shelters in case it's raining.

Laugh a lot. Have fun. And be sure and steal a kiss when the moment presents itself. :smallwink:

[Shadow]

Most of the ladies out there are going to scoff at this one, but....

My first date, every time:
Truck Stop!

Think about it.
It's a first date. I don't want to spend a ton of cash on a freaking interview! I just want to know if this is the type of girl that I may possibly be interested in pursuing something further with.
So I take her someplace cheap. Someplace that we can sit and get to know each other. Someplace that's going to show me what type of girl she is.

If she can have fun sitting and chatting with me in a freaking truck stop without complaining that we're in a damn truck stop, I may just be interested in taking her out again.

If she can do that, she may get a second date. That's when we go someplace nice.

But that's just me.

[Bor the Barbarian Monk]

And be sure and steal a kiss when the moment presents itself. :smallwink:
Ahhh...This reminds me of a date in my teens with a lovely lass named Serena.

Our first date was an evening stroll around her neighborhood. With a father and older sister as New York City cops, I was sure to be on my best behavior. So we walked, and talked, and had lots of laughs. A lot of hand-holding, too.

Then came the moment to say goodnight. We were at her front door, and it seemed we both wanted that kiss...but when it happened, it was more like an accidental collision of faces. It had to be the worst kiss I'd ever delivered. So I apologized. "I'm sorry...That could've been better," I muttered.

There are times in life when you experience what I like to call "movie moments." It's as though the moment was scripted, and the director got what he wanted on the very first take.

In response to my embarrassment, Serena looked me in the eye and said, "Well, practice makes perfect."

A much better kiss ensued, making it the end to a perfect date. :smallsmile:

[happyturtle]

*scoffs* :smalltongue:

She's interviewing you as well, remember? If a guy took me to a smoky truck stop to eat greasy overcooked food on a first date, I'd figure he wasn't going to put much effort into other activities either ifyouseewhatimean. There are plenty of cheap dates out there that don't involve diesel fumes.

[Shadow]

But the important part is the interaction between US! If she can overlook our surroundings, and STILL have fun with me....

Then I'll still be interested....

[CrazedGoblin]

But the important part is the interaction between US! If she can overlook our surroundings, and STILL have fun with me....

Then I'll still be interested....

sneaky, but very true i guess

[happyturtle]

But the important part is the interaction between US! If she can overlook our surroundings, and STILL have fun with me....

Then I'll still be interested....

If you sign up on the shipping permissions thread (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=86308), I'll totally write that up. :smallbiggrin:

[Shadow]

From a different thread, after an epic Gitp meet-up:
Shadow: You are a beast man... a BEAST! I don't think it is physically possible to frown when interacting with you. Oh, and I rolled seven sevens...So it's not like I'm a boring guy. I get pretty crazy. I just want to have fun, at all times, and if I get bored I make my own fun.

If she can do that WITH ME, she's a keeper, and I'll take her out somewhere fun next time.
If she can't do that, I'm glad I didn't waste any more time and money than necessary.
If you sign up on the shipping permissions thread (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=86308), I'll totally write that up. :smallbiggrin:*Goes to sign up....*

[Ranna]

I am in agreement with the ice skating idea... it is always fun and then food somewhere not too expensive though and maybe not one of your regular spots... you don't want over friendly waitresses asking you about where that other girl you were seeing went....

[Thes Hunter]

Yeah 1st dates should be somewhere were some talking can happen.

And I agree if it's an 'interview' lets see if there is any chemistry here date, than something casual and cheap is good, though I generally use coffee shops instead of truck stops... but then again I am a bit of a pretentious yuppie type. :smallbiggrin:

However if you already know that there is chemistry, and it's not an 'interview' type of dealy but more like a formalization of the status change from 'friends' to 'dating' then I think it calls for the nice resturaunt and all the dressing up and fuss. But just because you're all dressed up, doesn't mean there should be any less silliness and fun. :smalltongue:


But then again, what do I know, it's been a while since I 'first dated' and I am sure it will be a while yet before I again.

[Felixaar]

That's a much bigger topic. This is about ideas for dates, not how to deal with your ex-girlfriend and your new girlfriend hooking up or something (note, this is not meant to be an insult/mockery :P)

That happened to my best friend several times. Since both our girls are bi-sexual we're getting a bit paranoid.

But I should point out that the RWA thread is actually for any questions you have - it doesnt even have to be romantic, it could be dealing with friends, neighbours, roomates, family. We're nice people in there, we're not going to say "Nah, sorry, your question doesnt QUITE work for us. No advice for you." Even those of us who don't really have any good advice for you will do whatever we can to help.

SoD makes a good suggestion of the Moonlight Picnic (be sure to choose a night where you actually get moonlight tho).

Shadow's idea is so stupid it has to work.

happyturtle "...Or even when it doesn't."

Hey, it could work.

Bor is clearly a romantic genius - and for that matter, damn near managed to make me cry with that little description. Also, dont stare at other women. Man, that explains it. I kid, I kid.

Having, as yet, never been on a first date myself (I'm a lousy boyfriend :smallbiggrin:) I don't know what I can really offer. While the movies get a lot of put down its not that bad an idea, plus provides alot of conversation topic afterwards.

Going for a walk, especially through the mall is a good idea, but you need to have some patience, girls get drawn to clothes stores. I know that sounds stereotypical but in most cases its true. Ofcourse, if you're willing to let them dress you up (and have a large amount of cash for all the clothes they'll want you to buy), then bingo.

Probably a good idea is to pick an outing you enjoy - you, as in just you, not the two of you - so you can see if she likes it too. For instance, I love going to the movies, and can be kinda meticulous about where I sit (third row back, middle, as long as I dont have to push past people or sit directly in front of or behing people), so any chick who has very different ideas about it might not make the cut.

At any rate, good luck.

[Don Julio Anejo]

Weird no-one's mentioned nightclubs...

That's what I usually do - go for coffee and then go out partying.

[TRM]

I second the movies are bad first dates motion. Look for something that gives both of you something to do (rather than just "meeting in the park to talk" or similar) even if you don't hit it off conversationally immediately; the active things that were already suggested are especially good, because being active is fun! Really, with a first date, what you really need to do is talk and get to know each other (assuming you don't already have a base to work from—such as already being good friends); find activities that can spark a conversation, but don't restrict you to only one topic (another reason why movies are bad).
Edit: Maybe try thinking about it from her perspective? Pretend that you were getting asked out on a first date, and decide what would be a fulfilling first date for you—it's important to make yourself happy as well.

On the subject of movie dates: Movies dates seem to me to actually be much better for later dates, dates when you already know each other well enough that you can be comfortable not talking for most of the evening and still be happy with the result. From my perspective, if a girl that I barely knew (i.e: we're not already friends) asked me out to a movie I would feel disappointed at the end of the date. Assuming we didn't hang out together afterwards or before, we probably would have less than half-an-hour of talking time—not good for a first date.

Edit:
Weird no-one's mentioned nightclubs...


Night clubs only work if you're over 18 (and I don't think we know how old he is...)

Also, never been to a nightclub, but mightn't it be too easy to meet someone "better" while clubbing? :smallsigh:

[reorith]

shooting ranges are always fun dates. just don't get smacked in the face by your piece/scope/etc. black eyes are always suspicious and any explanation you offer will sound false.

[Thes Hunter]

Shooting ranges will certainly act as a selective factor if a woman being ok with firearms is important to you.


To me, guns are icky.... though I may one day go to a firing range because even though I find guns to be icky, I would like to know how to fire one if I need to.


But showing off the 9 mm you keep under your bed to the girl you like on your first date might not be a good idea.

[Collin152]

Wow, this thread has my hopes up.

Seems a good first date is impossible in this state. :P

[Jack Squat]

shooting ranges are always fun dates. just don't get smacked in the face by your piece/scope/etc. black eyes are always suspicious and any explanation you offer will sound false.

If you hold it correctly, you really shouldn't get smacked in the face by anything...and I can't think of any way you can possibly be smacked by your scope unless you're pressing your eye up to it, which is not only awkward, but you don't really get a good focus.

As to the subject of shooting ranges for dates. I at least know that my girlfriend does not enjoy shooting, and probably will never fire a gun again. Now, her first time was trying to shoot clays with a .410, instead of the much easier stationary targets with a .22, but the point still stand that not everyone is interested in shooting, and for a first date, I'd suggest something more traditional unless you're sure she'll enjoy it.

I would say hiking is a good one, as is going to a local rock climbing place, or even just heading to the park with a frisbee and some snacks.

[EndlessWrath]

Note: I don't discourage movies or are mocking any of you or such... this is just my opinion.

I find sitting down at a movie not date fitting. although it is a classic, I find sitting staring at a large screen isn't really doing anything. A memorable date is one where you do something that you and him/her like to do. Putt putt or maybe Laser quest if fitting, a walk in the park and end with a nice spectacular dinner... if you don't want to take her out, why not cook something? (a little much for a first date but second and thirds aren't out of the question)

Also... one must dazzle him/her. don't start out awesome and then dwindle down. Start good, then build up to the best.

Thats at least what I find works. I've only had one relationship not work out right after the first date... and that was the one i took her to the movies =P. Movies are fine and good... but that shouldn't be it...it should be the build up

[sktarq]

Two ideas

A: How about the zoo or aquarium. Time it on a school/work day if possible to minimize the number of little kids. It can be rather unexpected, you can walk around and talk and any gaps in the conversation are restarted by talking about the creatures or people in front of you. Small fuzzy animals generally put people in good moods (always good for a date) and watching animals cuddle often leads to people cuddling. It is an open, public place which is good for a first date, especially a first meet from the internet. Most also have great "date snacks" like ice cream cones and gift store to pick out something that matches her personality (fridge magnet or plush toy etc.).

B: Arts Fairs, Flea markets, Generally found in downtown areas that allow for any easy switch to a dinning venue of your choice (which I recomend you not plan but have a couple ideas on depending on how the date goes....very well someplace intimate, very friendly i'd point to a cafe, etc.) Again interesting stuff to talk about that lets the conversation roam. No real requirement about buying anything as lookie-loos are all over. Lots of good opertunity for jokes. Again public.

[The Rose Dragon]

DVD hunting.

If you're at a relatively rural or suburban area with no access to megastores, and if your date likes movies, DVD hunting can be a great way to spend half of a date. It says a lot about your tastes, and you can get to the strangest places discussing cinema.

[Thes Hunter]

I really like zoos, museums, aquariums... because it means I can geek out and see if the guy runs once he realizes I'm not a dumb blond. :smallbiggrin:

[The Extinguisher]

I'm the kind of person that likes to take these things really, really slow. I like the idea of a movie. Obviously not as the only part of the date, but if you can sit and enjoy each other's company while not talking, then it should work out well. But then again, I am the kind of person that isn't going to ask out someone I don't know. I generally have already done the getting to know someone part of the dating process before hand as friends. So I'm not really much help in this for you.

[SadisticFishing]

THIS is exactly what I was looking for. Just a whole bunch of ideas, and pros and cons, nothing to do with my particular situation - we're 19, by the way.

Pet store is one of the few ideas I've had, but it fits in so well with a lot of yours. Malls, stopping in a pet store to go "awww..."

Movie can be icky, but we're both movie talkers, and I think we'd both be fine with pissing off a theatre - could even be fun...

Taking up a sport/wtf as a first date seems.. Odd. Also, we're both rather competitive people, so that's probably a bad idea.

[Gaelbert]

I've seen a lot of picnics mentioned, and I'm leaning towards using one as a second date coupled with an art museum. Does anyone have suggestions as to what sort of food would work well at a picnic? Bonus points if you can come up with things that use no wheat, rye, barley, or oats, but I can usually find/make a substitute for those so it's not extremely important.

[happyturtle]

Cold roast chicken
Veggies and dip
Berries
Wraps (assuming you can get an appropriate tortilla)
Cheese

[sktarq]

Fruit, Grapes (very romantic), and Pears pair well with cheese. Use rice crackers to match with the cheese as well as hummus which is a good bet (actually if you look around the right places you can select a variety of hummus types, lentils, chickpeas, with olives, with garlic etc that can keep this option going for a long time).
also consider dried fruit as they store well, are hard to damage bouncing around in a bag, and aren't messy.

Actually I'd recomend making a couple of wraps (using corn tortillas) that morning, complete with contiments but avoid tomato, and then wrap in Aluminium Foil-they end up self marinating and all the flavors meld-which can be really good. And yes I'd recomen cold roast chicken breasts for the wraps-20-25 mnutes in a tented pan at 300F with a bit of butter and a few herbs the night before-we get the meat in packs of four or six. Eat one then save the others for later.

Snap Peas-nuf said.

Your favorite nuts (almonds, pecans, wallnuts etc not her...she won't fit in the basket)

What also works if you want to fancier and don't have to worry about it keeping for too long. Pack a pack of tortillas/bread subsitute, a packet or three of sandwitch meats, a wedge of cheese, an onion, maybe a jar of pickle, a favorite condiment or two andtoss a bag of spinach/lettuce on top. Then spread it all out on a cutting board with a knife. Make your own there.

[Quirinus_Obsidian]

The best date I ever took a girl on was to the local restaurant/pub and shoot some billiards. Simple, effective. It was one of the best nights. It ended with a Bor-esque face-mash, but, me and the girl worked on that =D

Note: first kiss; do not close your eyes until after she does, so you can more easily triangulate where she is going.

1: close quarters (yummy)
2: easy access to food (yummy, repeated)
3: On certain nights of the week, can be quiet enough to talk about stuff.
4: easy access to normally good beer (if of legal age, that is)

[zeratul]

I've seen a lot of picnics mentioned, and I'm leaning towards using one as a second date coupled with an art museum. Does anyone have suggestions as to what sort of food would work well at a picnic? Bonus points if you can come up with things that use no wheat, rye, barley, or oats, but I can usually find/make a substitute for those so it's not extremely important.

Fried chicken is good, baked goods are good, if you want something warm you can bring hot chocolate or coffee in a giant thermos, the other things people have mentioned work as well.

[evisiron]

Bowling is a good one, but make sure you don't destroy her score wise if you are good. (Thankfully, I don't have this problem: I suck! :smallbiggrin:).

[Halna LeGavilk]

Take her out to a local restuarant, preferably one not too expensive and has some atmosphere. It's usually fun and not too expensive.

[Jack Squat]

Bowling is a good one, but make sure you don't destroy her score wise if you are good. (Thankfully, I don't have this problem: I suck! :smallbiggrin:).

I'm horrible as well..high score of 95. My g/f has her own ball and had bowled more recently than me, she apparantly gets rusty fast. That or she made up the part about having averaged in the 130s.

On a semi-related note, if either of you have a Wii, skip the rental fee and just go wii bowling. In my experiance, it's more fun (and easier), although some people prefer bowling alleys for the atmosphere.

[Felixaar]

Note how FMA's sigged New Zealand banner makes no provisions about the sheep, or why all new zealanders have... wooly... hair.

I kid, I kid.

Bowling's a good idea. I typically go bowling with my dad though, it's one of our - well, more like our only - father son activities. Funny thing is that theres no clear victor, usually one of us wins by a big margin but exactly who it is changes each time we play - even when we play two games it will usually be a big victory but the winner changes each time.

I stand by my previous advice of just doing one of the things you love doing and see how she feels about it.