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Vaynor
2006-09-14, 06:55 PM
" '...Quick, help me carry Fred. We'll find shelter, and wait until he comes to.' "

Jaques grunted with the wait of Fred, his leg bowing beneath the weight. He kept on stumbling through the rain. Then, Fam'tala cried out, which at first seemed like pain, but Jaques realized it was from joy. He helped to set Fred down, and Fam'tala grinned down at the weary man, and pointed into the distance. Up ahead was a small cave, it's dark, looming mouth a small dot in the wilderness.

"Finally, shelter," Jaques gasped. He sat down on the ground, and took a long, deep breath.

"Let's get a move on, once we're there we can rest," Fam'tala explained.

Jaques got up, grumbling, and helped Fam'tala pick up Fred again. They went on their way, keeping up a good pace so they could make shelter as soon as possible.

I can't wait to be out of this rain, and into the nice, safe cave... thought Jaques.


[hr]

Cave monster, anyone? Anyways, how's that for a first post?

EDIT:

Ideally, you should have posted 3 days ago, but... meh.
I was told to wait.

Brickwall
2006-09-14, 07:10 PM
Good, since nobody was determining the outcome of the vote *glares at OP*

I guess that means I'm up. I have way better ideas than cave-monsters, though. Besides, they've still gotta get away from the thing that's approaching (for now), remember?

Vaynor
2006-09-14, 07:13 PM
Good, since nobody was determining the outcome of the vote *glares at OP*

I guess that means I'm up. I have way better ideas than cave-monsters, though. Besides, they've still gotta get away from the thing that's approaching (for now), remember?
Yeah, yeah, I just thought if there was a monster in the cave, AND something coming after them, it would add to the action/suspense. ;)

Brickwall
2006-09-14, 07:25 PM
No, it'd add to the main characters getting skooshed in Chapter 2. Yes, they're the main characters. Action/suspense is when you know they have a chance, you just don't know how they will end up making it.

PhoeKun
2006-09-14, 07:51 PM
That's pretty much how it works. A cave monster pretty much means the heroes are screwed, unless it is a pathetically weak cave monster... and if that's the case, why did we bother adding it?

Vaynor
2006-09-14, 08:56 PM
Good point. But make sure they hear the thingy coming closer... Just to make it a LITTLE suspenseful. ;)

Brickwall
2006-09-14, 09:19 PM
Fam'tala can sense it. There's no need to hear it. Why must it even be big? Jaques hinted at it, so wouldn't everyone not reading this be like "Whoa, that not-giant thing is the monster?! Doubleyew Tee Srubbing Bubbles Eff!"

I had my own plans for the monster, but I will leave it ambiguous until I have to. I don't want to dictate too much of the story, lest people start overwriting me *glares at Abd*.

______________________

nice safe cave...

As soon as the group was five feet into the cave, Jaques collapsed on his leg. He could go no further.

"Come on, Jaques, we have to go. Fred can't stay near this thing!" Fam'tala's face was obscured by darkness, but Jaques could tell she was worried.

"You try running away with a leg half-made of eyes! Besides, it's a cave, we can't run much farther!" Fam'tala was silent. Jaques only heard her feet as she walked further into the cave. And further, and further, and further...it was no regular cave. A sudden chorus of screeching heralded a mass of panicked bats into the mouth, though they turned around on a dime at the sign of the Storm - all animals could sense it instinctively.

"This isn't just a little cave, it's an entrance to some kind of tunnel! I can't tell if it's natural or not!" Jaques was tempted to smile. Was this their escape? Would they be safe for another Storm? With renewed vigor, he slowly dragged Fred along the cave floor. He hoped that being unable to see wouldn't be too much more of a handicap, but even the hope brought a worried frown to his face.

_________

Will the monster chase them through? Where does this lead? Why? What's inside? All for the next writer to do!

Sophistemon
2006-09-14, 09:46 PM
That would be...

PhoeKun.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-15, 12:08 AM
I had my own plans for the monster, but I will leave it ambiguous until I have to. I don't want to dictate too much of the story, lest people start overwriting me *glares at Abd*.

Ah, come on, I know you love me.

...one little slip in my reading, and I gotta pay for it through the teeth...

Brickwall
2006-09-16, 01:32 PM
Teeth? I was going for way worse than that. Bend over, and prepare to feel significant pain in your metaphorical wallet.

Don Beegles
2006-09-16, 05:30 PM
Holy mixed metaphors, Batman!

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-16, 06:33 PM
Holy mixed metaphors, Batman!

Yeah, I'm not touching that one. Despite that it was aimed at me. :P

Sophistemon
2006-09-16, 09:33 PM
PhoeKun's turn is long over, and so is the turn of the person after him. However, if he would like to, PhoeKun may still take his turn before the next person goes.

I mean, c'mon. It's possible that he forgot.

PhoeKun
2006-09-16, 10:04 PM
but even the hope brought a worried frown to his face...

Jaques steeled himself before following after Fam'tala. He stumbled several times along the way; it was difficult to navigate in the dark. And to be sure, it was difficult to tell whether or not the cave was natural or otherwise. The walls were rough to the touch, but the floor seemed unnaturally straight. Or at least it did until Jaques put his hole in a divot, and fell flat on his face.

This elicited a chuckle from Fam'tala. Apparently, he had caught up.

"See? You can still move. Now, come on; help me carry Fred. We can't stop here..."

Jaques might have complained, but he knew she was right. Taking some of Fred's weight onto his shoulder, he walked blindly forward into the darkness, side by side with Fam'tala. The air was heavy and oppressive, and Jaques could swear he kept hearing... something echo off the walls. He'd never wanted anything so much as he wanted a light right now...
------------------------------------

Yes, let's say I forgot. It works better that way.

Sophistemon
2006-09-16, 10:47 PM
Good job, PhoeKun. Well done. IvanMcK is up!

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-17, 02:56 AM
It would appear we're actually starting to build upon the proposed romantic involvement between Jaques and Fam'tala. Awesome. I'm a terrible romantic writer, I've only been good at massive plot changes so far, so I'm relying on you guys to really seal the deal here.

Sophistemon
2006-09-17, 01:03 PM
I've never written a romance myself, but I think that I can figure it out.

S'long as it isn't a sad romance. I like happy endings.

ivanmckilliagin
2006-09-18, 07:07 AM
He'd never wanted anything so much as he wanted a light right now...

He didn't get his wish, but after a few more minutes of walking in the inky blackness, the managed to find a dry, flat area, and laid Fred up against a wall before huddling down to wait for him to wake up.

"What happened to Fred?" asked Jaques, while cursing himself at his ignorance of the gifts and boons of others.

"It's a long story, Jaques, but I guess we got some time," replied Fam'Tala.

Brickwall
2006-09-18, 04:05 PM
...

Am I the only one who thinks that's the biggest cop-out in the thread yet?

Wimp.

PhoeKun
2006-09-18, 04:07 PM
... Ei Yei!

No, Brickwall. You are not the only one.

Sophistemon
2006-09-18, 06:15 PM
Before I write my piece, I need to know something. How many types of 'Gifts' are there?

There are the bad ones. What do we call them? Curses?
Then there are the Gifts, which grant strange abilities to people.
Then there are Boons, which give great power. Did I miss any?

PhoeKun
2006-09-18, 06:40 PM
I'm trying very hard, but I can't remember a time when we mentioned bad Gifts. There are Ravages, which are the scars left by the Storm (which lead to Gifts, as is my understanding), but no negative Gifts...

But I shouldn't be considered the authority on the matter, especially today. Although... didn't Brickwall essentially create all of these things? Damn, he's practically running this story. :P

Sophistemon
2006-09-18, 06:51 PM
Okay.
Ravages, Gifts, and Boons.
Brickwall can yell us more.

Brickwall
2006-09-18, 09:12 PM
Ravages? Huh...I don't remember that. Did I make that one?

No, I'm not running the story, I just got some stuff in while you were all *insert semi-naughty word here*ing around deciding "Oh, what ever direction can we take this story?"

Yeah, so...take a lesson from this. Act first and laugh last.

Sophistemon
2006-09-18, 09:18 PM
Well, I like the word 'Ravages' for the negative aspects of the Storm, so I'm going to use that. I'll have my part up tomorrow, round 3:ish.

Brickwall
2006-09-18, 09:32 PM
I like it. Make it a good one, to make up for Ivan's failure *more glaring*.

ivanmckilliagin
2006-09-19, 11:52 AM
Meh, my creativity isn't a faucet. I wanted to give something, rather than just not post, or really cop out and say i wasn't ready to.

Instead, i gave someone else a way to further the exposition by setting up a question about them.

Not every paragraph of a book is action-packed...

PhoeKun
2006-09-19, 12:11 PM
It doesn't need to be action packed. In fact, I'd say there's very little actual action in this story at all.

But what you did was say, "I don't know what to write" and make it part of the story. It was the single biggest cop-out in the history of this project. Quite frankly, I'd have preferred it if you had "really copped out" and just admitted you weren't ready.

People get writer's block - it's ok to admit it.

Brickwall
2006-09-19, 03:39 PM
If you'll notice, we have done so. Many times. A weel. Each.

Bad writers always quit, good writers never quit, and great writers know when to quit.

Sophistemon
2006-09-19, 08:45 PM
"It's a long story, Jaques, but I guess we got some time," replied Fam'Tala.

Fam'tala sat down, removed a candle from her pack, lit it, and ran her hands over the aching muscles of her legs. Jaques also sat, but refrained from the self-administered massage.

"I'm all ears," he said. Fam'tala chuckled. "What?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just something fitting to our current topic; I once knew a man covered in ears." Jaques blanched. "Oh, it wasn't so bad. He wasn't crippled any, and his hearing was marvelous. Anything louder than a whisper caused him to double over in agony, though." Jaques glanced at his leg, which no longer hurt.

"I see," he said. "We were talking about what happened to Fred, I think." Fam'tala nodded.

"Right. Well, for you to understand that, we should probably go over the three types of Stormchanges. You know what a Stormchange is, right?" Jaques looked at her and raised an eyebrow. Then he glanced at his leg. Fam'tala gasped. "I'm so sorry! That was callous."

"Don't worry about it. Just go on." She nodded.

"Well, the first and most common type of Stormchanges are the Ravages. Now, all Stormchanges have a negative aspect, but Ravages have very little to no positive aspect. Things Ravaged by the Storm tend to die very quickly afterwards, too mutated to survive."

Jaques looked at his leg. What positive aspect had it ever exhibited?

"The next type, much rarer than the Ravages, are the Gifts. Gifts, like Ravages, have a good and bad aspect to them, though with Gifts they're generally equal in severity. I, myself, am considered Gifted, as was my friend with all the ears." Jaques did not like that she referred to him in the past-tense. She continued: "Even rarer than that, almost unheard of, really, are the Boons. The positive aspect of a Boon nearly completely makes up for it's negative aspect. Fred has a Boon."

((There. Sorry for that being so long. I'm leaving a description of Fred's powers up to the next person, as I've already written too much. Also, there are some things in this that could contradict some things already written, though I tried my hardest to weed all of those out. If I've missed anything, please bring it to my attention.))

((PS. Hope this makes up for my last contribution, as it wasn't that great.))

Brickwall
2006-09-19, 08:50 PM
Remember where they are- total darkness. You used visual references too much without note of the pitch-black surrounding them.[/critic]

Good to have things clarified, but I bet Jaques is even more curious about Fam'tala's scar(/Ravage).

Abd, redeem yourself in my eyes.

Sophistemon
2006-09-19, 09:22 PM
Hold on. I'll have someone light a candle. Is that allowed? Can I do that?*

Also, Fam'tala has a Gift. She may have a scar, but it's called a Gift due to the criteria noted above.

*Did it. I'll remove it if asked.

PhoeKun
2006-09-19, 09:55 PM
I would ask that, if you are going to light a candle, you take a sentence or two extra to describe what in blazes this cave actually looks like. And also, there's a typo where Fam'tala says, "I once know a man..." which of course, should read 'knew'.

That's minor, I'm just pointing it out because I noticed it.

Sophistemon
2006-09-19, 10:20 PM
Right-o. Thanks for the typo-alert. I'll fix that now and add a description of the cave tomorrow.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-21, 01:35 AM
"...Fred has a boon."

Jaques glanced around the dimly lit cavern. By candlelight he could ascertain little of his surroundings, but he could tell the cavern walls were not entirely natural looking. The stone was smooth, rippled and black, and looked to almost flow like quicksilver in the flickers of light. Fam'tala continued.

"When he was caught in the Storm, he was glanced by a bolt of silverfire. He doesn't like to talk about it, but I think he was left behind after taking that hit- few people survive such a close brush with the Storm's energies. I can only imagine what he must have gone through... clawing his way to shelter, looking for scraps of food, all the while in such pain..."

Jaques fixed his eyes on his crippled companion. The physical effects of the silverfire were clear as day. Jaques remembered the feel of that energy, washing over him for even the brief second that it had from several knots away, burning and tearing at him like no other pain he had ever imagined. The stubborn bastard just won't let anything kill him.

"...Fred ended up with power over other Gifts. He could control them, enhance them, or take them into himself with a touch. He joined the Hunters soon after. He was a great teammate. Everyone wanted a Hunter on their side who could double the strength of their Gift. But he had a lot of difficulty controlling his Boon at first.

"Once, on a mission, he was out with a woman named Janelle, a shaper. The two were ambushed by a pack of Denizens. Fred doesn't really talk about the details, but from his report, she was severely wounded. Fred tried to take her powers to make a wall, or something, to protect them, but he drew too much... he drew her Boon into himself, and killed her doing it.

"And what's worst... he and Janelle were lovers."

---

God, exposition like a mother. Like smacking our readers with a hammer. Does this reconcile our contradictory story elements, Brickwall?

Brickwall
2006-09-21, 04:34 PM
By making someone else a shaper? Ummm...nope, not really! Still, it's a nice write.

And you've added a new thing for the readers to be confused about! Silverfire! Yeys!

Really, there's no way this is getting fixed without somebody getting snubbed. It just turns out everyone has voted it to be me. I just enjoy acting bitter about it. Now quit acting like I'm trying to ruin your life please?

Drinking anything more than a glass of wine per night is unhealthy.

PhoeKun
2006-09-21, 04:59 PM
Really? I had always heard that a glass and a half was good for you.

This requires further study... or maybe more wine.

Brickwall
2006-09-21, 09:10 PM
One glass. One glass only. Not a half. The half is for hedonists and drunks. You're not a drunk, are you?

Abd is, but I'm not asking him. Either way, it also has to be red wine. Red. White is not healthy.

Sophistemon
2006-09-21, 09:36 PM
Well, I liked it. Good job, Abd.

Who's next?

Brickwall
2006-09-21, 11:48 PM
Vaynor, then me, then...uhh, someone.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-22, 03:22 AM
One glass. One glass only. Not a half. The half is for hedonists and drunks. You're not a drunk, are you?

Abd is, but I'm not asking him. Either way, it also has to be red wine. Red. White is not healthy.

Harrumph. I am no drunk. I merely only post while drunk. Or insane. It's kind of a toss up for me. Although it's quite easy to conceal both through the watchful editor of my keyboard.

Brickwall
2006-09-23, 05:48 PM
Okay, I guess it's now my turn. I will make something after dinner.

Sophistemon
2006-09-23, 07:13 PM
Sounds good. Someone should tell Vaynor that he's missed his turn.

Brickwall
2006-09-23, 08:01 PM
"What's worse, he and Janelle were lovers."

"But what was he just trying to do now that caused him to get so...poisoned? You just sense things, and I have no Gift!"

Fam'tala looked away from the light somewhat. "I really don't know. Maybe he was trying to damage the thing itself." Jaques looked bewildered.

"How could he do that? Denizens of any continent don't have gifts."

"Not every enemy of ours is a denizen, Jaques." A silence filled the cavern. "Come on, we should get moving. If the cavern continues straight on until the next exit, we won't be too off-track."

____________
Short, but I think it was necessary to point out that there were more threats to the world than "denizens". Why not, after all? And how do these things have Gifts...? Bwahahahaaaa!

Brickwall
2006-09-24, 07:13 PM
PhoeKun has an hour to post.

Sophistemon
2006-09-24, 09:43 PM
Ivan's in trouble. (http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=banter;action=display;num=1159120813 ;start=0) Please come and show your support. It's important.

Brickwall
2006-09-24, 10:59 PM
The thread's closed.

I really hope he doesn't do something foolish. You can be forgiven many times, but you can only live once. Life should not be spent unhappy. Not even an instant of it.

PhoeKun
2006-09-25, 12:29 AM
PhoeKun has an hour to post.

PhoeKun was busy. And he continues to be.

Also, while Ivan's situation is upsetting, I'm not going to pay it much mind. There's nothing I can say to fix the situation... that's something he's got to do himself. In the meantime, there's no point in making myself upset by thinking about it.

Brickwall
2006-09-26, 08:53 PM
According to the order, it is nearing the end of Abd's turn (I skipped over Ivan, since he's having well-known troubles).

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-27, 02:01 AM
According to the order, it is nearing the end of Abd's turn (I skipped over Ivan, since he's having well-known troubles).
Are you kidding? I posted, then Brickwall, then back to me? Wow.

...uhh, okay. I guess I'll post. I'll be ready in a few hours.

EDIT: I'd like to clarify a few things before I post (and sober up a bit, indicating a post tomorrow afternoon, but at the pace we've been going I doubt that will slow us down significantly). I'm going to assume the following in my next update if no one shoots these down.

1. The Denizen Hunters (Fam' and Fred) have both seen the oracle?
2. This cave is of unknown depth, origin, material and may contain non-Denizen threats?
3. Jaques is still hesitant to see the oracle and thus learn his "destiny"?

Vaynor
2006-09-27, 10:48 AM
Dang, missed my turn. Oh well. I'll have to wait then... :P

PhoeKun
2006-09-27, 01:20 PM
1. The Denizen Hunters (Fam' and Fred) have both seen the oracle?
2. This cave is of unknown depth, origin, material and may contain non-Denizen threats?
3. Jaques is still hesitant to see the oracle and thus learn his "destiny"?

1. Presumably.

2. Yes, yes, yes, and perhaps. The known, supposedly non-Denizen threat is what was chasing them outside, or so the faeries tell me.

3. It certainly seems that way.

Brickwall
2006-09-27, 08:35 PM
1. I think I used Oracle in the indefinite, meaning there are multiple.

2. Probably not just the cave, but yeah. Pretty much everywhere, really.

But seeing as you guys change my writing anyway, this would be the most minor thing.

Anyway, this is a possible goodbye. I may never post here again.

PhoeKun
2006-09-28, 12:59 AM
Being familiar with the circumstances you are concerned about, I can only say I hope that doesn't come to pass. You're as valued a member of this group as any.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-28, 03:29 AM
But seeing as you guys change my writing anyway, this would be the most minor thing.

Anyway, this is a possible goodbye. I may never post here again.

I doubt there is anything I can say that will make you reconsider; frankly, I caused the situation that created this problem. It would be a great shame to lose you, given all you've added to the story so far- frankly, more than any other writer, including myself.

I've tried to make my peace with you, and although you've generally dismissed my attempts as unnecessary, you are clearly hurt by the fact that your writing was overruled. Disregarding that one cannot possibly control the story progression in this medium (which is part of the appeal, generally) and disregarding the (albeit poor) attempts to reconcile your story elements with those mistakes, I can understand how a good writer such as yourself would feel hurt by both the individual (me) and the group which overwrote your work.

However, suffice it to say, we've been doing everything we can think of short of rewriting all of the recent entries to keep your work in the story. Mistakes in this sort of forum will happen- and I'm sure these words will come around to bite me later- and we must learn to accept these mistakes and the rather significant attempts to make amends offered.

If you're backing out now, I will miss your work, which has thus far been critical in keeping this story together. However, if you cannot either (a) accept the attempts to make amends or (b) at least tell us what we can offer you, within reason, to make you feel better about this situation, I am willing to accept your stepping down. After all, I cannot offer you an unlimited control of my own works or the works of others.

Brickwall
2006-09-28, 03:37 PM
Wow, nice monologue. I am now going to laugh.

*there is laughing here*

I was talking about my possible impending bannage, which did not come to pass. I had no plans on backing out of RRST without a fight.

Suffice to say, I have resigned myself to the fact that my idea was overruled and replaced. I just love busting all your chops about it.

Actually, I think I mentioned that earlier. You're still not paying attention to me!

Yes I'm being sarcastic.

Anyway, it's your turn again, Groucho.

Sophistemon
2006-09-28, 04:53 PM
I'll send him a PM.

You did mean Vaynor, right?

Brickwall
2006-09-28, 08:17 PM
That's Vaynor? Wow. He must be some kind of master of disguise. The moustache and glasses really threw me off.[/bad movie humor cliche]

Sophistemon
2006-09-28, 10:53 PM
I'm not even going to try to get that joke, okay?

Whoever's next, take your turn, please.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-09-28, 11:23 PM
Wow. Don't I feel the fool. :-[

Still, it was a nice monologue.

I am actually cracking up while I write this.

Vaynor
2006-09-28, 11:27 PM
Wait... did I miss my turn again? Why does this keep happening to me!? Anyways, you never PMed me like you said you would Sophie! ;D

Sophistemon
2006-09-29, 01:06 AM
I couldn't decide if he meant you or someone else, and was just mentioning a personality trait.

Brickwall
2006-09-29, 09:53 PM
I meant Vaynor. I'll give him until tomorrow afternoon before I post my own.

Brickwall
2006-09-30, 04:35 PM
Maybe Vaynor should just say he's quitting...

Anyway, I will skip my turn by choice because I was the last one to post.

Or do you guys all want to drop out and have me make periodic installments?

Sophistemon
2006-09-30, 10:23 PM
I don't know what you're implying, Brickwall, but no. I'm not dropping out of this.

If you're choosing to forgo your turn than it is PhoeKun's turn now. Then Ivan's, then mine.

Brickwall
2006-10-01, 11:27 AM
I was implying that your (plural) lack of posting was similar to that of the first guy to drop out. Thus my suspicions.

Sophistemon
2006-10-01, 03:34 PM
I don't think that I missed my last turn.

Did I?

Brickwall
2006-10-01, 09:28 PM
Yes, yes you did. You haven't gone in quite a while.

I think we are once again sinking into anarchy.

Vaynor
2006-10-01, 09:31 PM
Sorry for my absence, I'm back now. (I did mention in my personal text I'd be back on Sunday)

Sophistemon
2006-10-02, 05:36 PM
Yes, yes you did. You haven't gone in quite a while.
Oh. Oops, sorry! I'll keep my eye on it more fervently. Does PhoeKun know that it's his turn?

Brickwall
2006-10-02, 09:15 PM
He has also said he has been busy.

Okay, next guy to go sets our place. How's that work out?

Sophistemon
2006-10-03, 03:05 PM
Okay, if PhoeKun isn't going it's IvanMcK's turn.

EDIT
Okay, Ivan's turn is over. I'll post later tonight.

Sophistemon
2006-10-05, 07:44 PM
"Not every enemy of ours is a denizen, Jaques." A silence filled the cavern. "Come on, we should get moving. If the cavern continues straight on until the next exit, we won't be too off-track."

Jaques nodded, snuffed the candle and placed it in his pack, which he shrugged onto his shoulders. Fam'tala rose to her feet and grabbed her own supplies. She looked at Fred.

"Wish he'd wake up. I'm none to pleased of the prospect of lugging him around for much longer." Jaques nodded in agreement.

"Yeah... Here, you grab his arms and we can get going." Working in tandem, the two managed to lift Fred from the ground and continue their exploration of the cavern.

Time passes, as do small snippets of conversation. It is as though the cave stifles interaction. Jaques swore in frustration.

"How large can this thing possibly be?" he demanded. Fam'tala adjusted her grip on Fred's arms and shrugged. Jaques continued: "What is this, the second hour we've been walking? When does it end?"
---------
This is terrible. I have no allusions to the contrary, but I didn't want to skip my turn again. To be fair to me, though, I do have a fever and my mind isn't working as quickly as it should be.

Vaynor
2006-10-05, 09:14 PM
Whose turn is it now?

Abd al-Azrad
2006-10-05, 09:23 PM
Whose turn is it now?
I'm pretty sure it's my turn now- but before I go, could we do something about the sudden change of tense? Most of this story has been written in the past, and now we suddenly change to present tense, which surprises me.

See what I did there? Writing my reference to each situation in its own tense?

Sophistemon
2006-10-05, 09:45 PM
I'll go back and fix that.

Vaynor
2006-10-05, 11:11 PM
Jaques nodded, snuffed the candle and placed it in his pack, which he shrugged onto his shoulders. Fam'tala rose to her feet and grabbed her own supplies. She looked at Fred.

"Wish he'd wake up. I'm none to pleased of the prospect of lugging him around for much longer." Jaques nodded in agreement.

"Yeah... Here, you grab his arms and we can get going." Working in tandem, the two managed to lift Fred from the ground and continue their exploration of the cavern.

Time passes, as do small snippets of conversation. It was as though the cave stifles interaction. Jaques swore in frustration.

"How large can this thing possibly be?" he demanded. Fam'tala adjusted her grip on Fred's arms and shrugged. Jaques continued: "What is this, the second hour we've been walking? When does it end?"

Brickwall
2006-10-06, 12:03 AM
Yeah, get a SpellCheck done there, man. You even used "Allusions" in place of "illusions" on a D&D board. Get some sleep.

PhoeKun
2006-10-06, 12:07 AM
I would like to take a second to apologize for my lack of involvement of late. I've had stuff to do, and while it has left me with a fair amount of free time, it has not left me with much in the way of creative energy.

Now that the story is finally moving again, I hope to be able to buck that trend...

Abd al-Azrad
2006-10-07, 02:56 AM
Jaques continued: "What is this, the second hour we've been walking? When does it end?"
There is a school of thought that suggests that the world does not exist outside of the perceptions of its inhabitants. While unlikely and unreasonable, this theory, often dismissed as arrogance, was lent a small amount of credit as Jaques finished his complaint, only to turn a bend in the tunnels and look into the candlelit room he now saw, a sight that caused him to simply freeze entirely.

A small, circular room. Waves of black liquid washed over the walls, spreading outward toward the myriad of tunnels branching off. The apparent cause of these waves was a torus of jet black material spinning, floating, about at eye level, throwing off shadowy liquid to all sides.

Fam'tala was the first to speak.

"Never in my life did I dream I would ever bear witness to the most holy of holies." She fell to her knees, hiding her face as she did so.

Jaques stepped forward, letting Fred slide to the ground.

"What is it?" he whispered, awestruck. Fred's wavering voice answered.

"A thrumstone."

Brickwall
2006-10-07, 09:44 AM
I made an awesome entry before I remembered that Vaynor gets 24 hours to make an entry. Still, if he passes, it's all made.

Vaynor
2006-10-07, 12:41 PM
Oh, is it my turn? If you like your entry so much, you can go before me. ;D

Sophistemon
2006-10-07, 08:37 PM
Yeah, get a SpellCheck done there, man. You even used "Allusions" in place of "illusions" on a D&D board. Get some sleep.
Yeah, thanks.

I fixed the problems. I'm still sick, but at least my mind is as sharp as it normally is (that ain't saying much, but...).

And I really liked Abd's addition. More fluff to keep track of. We're digging a pretty big hole.

Good stuff, though.

EDIT
Vaynor, for Shock's sake do a durned entry. Seriously.

PhoeKun
2006-10-07, 08:41 PM
More fluff to keep track of. We're digging a pretty big hole.


Don't worry, I'm keeping notes.

No, really.

Abd al-Azrad
2006-10-07, 11:10 PM
You know what? Considering how rarely anyone posts, I doubt that us deviating from the "posting order" would significantly increase confusion. Brickwall, you've been keeping the story going much more than the rest of us combined- whenever you have a decent idea, I've no problem at all with you jumping the line.

Sophistemon
2006-10-07, 11:15 PM
Yeah, I'm going to have to agree with that. I guess we'll just enforce the rules more unflinchingly when we start a new story, if we decide to.

EDIT
Nice to know, PhoeKun. Thanks.

Brickwall
2006-10-07, 11:24 PM
Jaques raised an eyebrow. "A thrumstone? What's that, a stone that makes sounds?"

"Kneel you idiot!" Fam'tala yelled as she pulled him to the ground by his shoulder. "And don't look at it until it starts making a sound. You could get blinded." Jaques did as he was told, and pretty soon he was greeted by a buzzing sound. Taking that as the cue to look up, he noticed that the torus had flipped onto one side and expanded to the size of the room, runes of the Lea'a Fanti Ancients inscribed all along it.

"Lea'a Fanti...?"

"Yes. These stones are the places where they took those with injured souls. The Greatest, the highest of all the pantheon, heals them at one."

"That's not possible. The Greatest never interacts with the world. He is a god of the gods, not of mortal affairs." Fam'tala did not respond. Instead, she dragged Fred over to the inky jet black that coated the floor, and he...sank? The fact that the substance could not have meen a centimeter thick did not matter to the unconcious body, especially not as it began swimming toward the enlarged thrumstone, still with eyes closed and a lack of any life on its face.

__________________________

Does he make it? What heppens if he does? Why should anyone recognize or revere the Lea'a Fanti and the Greatest? Find out, on somebody else's installment!

Sophistemon
2006-10-07, 11:42 PM
That was good.

It isn't my turn, is it? I just went...

Vaynor
2006-10-08, 12:33 AM
No, I believe it's mine.

EDIT: Expect one soon!


The fact that the substance could not have meen a centimeter thick did not matter to the unconcious body, especially not as it began swimming toward the enlarged thrumstone, still with eyes closed and a lack of any life on its face.
The thrumstone continued it's humming, buzzing like a bee. Fred's body swam ever closer into the black liquid, until the very tips of his toes centered on the darkness.

"What's going to happen to him!?" Jaques whispered urgently with an expression of pure confusion on his face.

"Will you shut up!?" Fam'tala replied, motioning towards the thumstone, she added, "Just watch!"

Jaques shut himself up, and turned back away from Fam'tala and silently watched the holy scene. The inky black liquid sprouted long tendrils and they started to spin around the thrumstone itself. Fred started to sink into the center of it, and it started to glow with a bluish light. The stone then issued such a horrible din of humming, that Jaques' and Fam'tala's ears started to bleed it was so loud.

Fred was gone...

[hr]
I had NO idea where to go with this one, so I just kinda stalled...

Brickwall
2006-10-08, 10:46 AM
Storytelling tip: Holy things are supposed to be pretty/mysterious. You really just kinda reversed the entire point of this scene, whatever you did.

So, yeah, that's not "stalling" (also something we kinda dislike, as we have yelled at others about).

Vaynor
2006-10-08, 12:18 PM
Storytelling tip: Holy things are supposed to be pretty/mysterious. You really just kinda reversed the entire point of this scene, whatever you did.

So, yeah, that's not "stalling" (also something we kinda dislike, as we have yelled at others about).
I thought that's what I did...

Anyway, I didn't completely stall, I made him disappear... That's something. :)

I can add more if I need to...

Brickwall
2006-10-08, 02:57 PM
I thought that's what I did...

Anyway, I didn't completely stall, I made him disappear... That's something. :)

I can add more if I need to...

Tentacles=evil. Always. No exceptions. That's what I meant.

You don't need to add more, you didn't stall. I'm just saying you SHOULDN'T stall.

Vaynor
2006-10-08, 03:07 PM
Tentacles=evil. Always. No exceptions. That's what I meant.

You don't need to add more, you didn't stall. I'm just saying you SHOULDN'T stall.
I said "tentacle-like", just to describe what it looked like. As in there was more than just the original thing. It was blossoming in a way.

Oh, ok, good. ;D

PhoeKun
2006-10-08, 03:18 PM
You shouldn't even invoke the image of tentacles unless you're implying some sort of evil, usually the horrible kind from another plane of existence. Adding the cutsey question mark in parentheses after the word holy doesn't help either.

Now, I believe it is my "turn" in so much as we have those any more. Within the next 12 or so hours, I should have something up.

Vaynor
2006-10-08, 03:48 PM
You shouldn't even invoke the image of tentacles unless you're implying some sort of evil, usually the horrible kind from another plane of existence. Adding the cutsey question mark in parentheses after the word holy doesn't help either.
I added the question mark because I wasn't sure if it was actually a good thing or not when writing it. I just couldn't get that from he two previous entries.

Brickwall
2006-10-08, 05:33 PM
If the first two say it's holy, questioning it isn't exactly the best thing to do. Be active in your contradictions, or just ride with it.

Wishy-washy writers are a great source of aggrivation.

Sophistemon
2006-10-08, 07:57 PM
I agree with them, Vaynor.

Perhaps another word-choice is in order. Would 'tendril' be any better? Hm?

Vaynor
2006-10-08, 09:08 PM
I agree with them, Vaynor.

Perhaps another word-choice is in order. Would 'tendril' be any better? Hm?
Yes! Tentacle was just all I could think of to describe the picture in my head.. ::)

Brickwall
2006-10-12, 05:21 PM
So...umm...

Am I up again? How is it that we have a ton of writers, and only 4 semi-consistent posters?

PhoeKun
2006-10-12, 05:27 PM
Because I am, in a word, unreliable. It would probably be best if you just dropped me from the list, much as I hate to say it...

Abd al-Azrad
2006-10-15, 02:43 PM
Dangit, we stagnated again. Strangely, it does look like it's Brickwall's turn- according to the new posting order, we go Phoekun, Ivan, Sophistemon, me, Vaynor, Brickwall.

No, wait, because Brickwall jumped the line to get in his addition, it's more likely Phoekun's. And if he ain't gonna post, it's Ivan's turn.