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View Full Version : Has anyone ever considered using Mike Tyson as a BBEG?



AstralFire
2008-09-24, 11:26 AM
Just looking over a list of his quotes... they're really worthy of BBEG-hood:



I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous that these mortals even attempt to enter my realm.
I was gonna rip his heart out... I'm the best ever.
I just want to conquer people and their souls.
My style is impetuous, my defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious.
I want his heart!
I want to eat his children!
One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand. He was out cold, convulsing on the floor like a infantile retard.
I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.
He called me a ‘rapist’ and a 'recluse'. I’m not a recluse.
All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here... I'd fight him too. (May require some substitution of 'Pelor' and 'Heironeous'.)

AKA_Bait
2008-09-24, 11:33 AM
Well, if ever there were reasons for mood controlling medications...

Could work for a bruser of a BBEG.

Telonius
2008-09-24, 11:36 AM
Never considered it. But if he were, you'd have to have King Hippo, Don Flamenco, and Piston Honda as some of his minions.

AstralFire
2008-09-24, 11:39 AM
Never considered it. But if he were, you'd have to have King Hippo, Don Flamenco, and Piston Honda as some of his minions.

Lil Mac could be an NPC. It could be an entire boxing campaign.

Gorbash
2008-09-24, 12:21 PM
He's just a mid lvl Monk. Or Improved Unnarmed Strike fighter, which is maybe even worse.

AstralFire
2008-09-24, 12:39 PM
He's just a mid lvl Monk. Or Improved Unnarmed Strike fighter, which is maybe even worse.

Or a Gestalt Unarmed Swordsage//Crusader.

Swordguy
2008-09-24, 12:49 PM
Dunno. Can humans take Weapon Proficiency (Bite)?

Thend
2008-09-24, 12:54 PM
No but after reading those quotes HELL YES! If only I knew what BBEG was. Pm me?

Spiryt
2008-09-24, 12:59 PM
^ Big Bad Evil Guy, if I'm not wrong.


He's just a mid lvl Monk. Or Improved Unnarmed Strike fighter, which is maybe even worse.

Well, indeed. And the most of world's population are 1-3 level commoners or 1-2 level experts.

I don't think that the point of the thread is to treat him realistically. Rather to make a boos monster from him. :smallwink:

AstralFire
2008-09-24, 01:01 PM
No but after reading those quotes HELL YES! If only I knew what BBEG was. Pm me?

Big Bad Evil Guy. A Campaign or Arc 'Boss'.

Eorran
2008-09-24, 01:02 PM
I dunno, I think he's less of a BBEG, more The Dragon (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheDragon). Mike Tyson would fall into the "Brute" category of monster in 4e (puts out a lot of punishment, low defenses, high HP.)

TheThan
2008-09-24, 01:04 PM
Never considered it. But if he were, you'd have to have King Hippo, Don Flamenco, and Piston Honda as some of his minions.

you forgot Soda Popinski, Mr. Sandman and Super Macho Man.

Prometheus
2008-09-24, 01:27 PM
No. I can't say I ever have.

Those quotes really are disturbing. Many time people use the Stupid Brute "Me like crush things" type of character, but very seldom do they make them talk like the aggressive musclebrain or the psychopathic kid who doesn't understand what is wrong with what he said. Those are much more scary, even if they have a very slight more intelligent.

Telonius
2008-09-24, 01:33 PM
you forgot Soda Popinski, Mr. Sandman and Super Macho Man.

Soda Popinski? He's just a poor deluded Drunken Master. Mr. Sandman fights for the love of it. And Super Macho Man? Yeah, I guess he'd be the right-hand man that gets eaten by the dimensional portal Iron Mike is trying to create.

Hey, there we go - we even have a name for the BBEG. Michael the Iron.

SurlySeraph
2008-09-24, 01:34 PM
He's just a mid lvl Monk. Or Improved Unnarmed Strike fighter, which is maybe even worse.

I'd say Barbarian. He gets very angry (why the hell else would he bite off a man's ear?!), and he's definitely not Lawful.
This is a great concept. The real world is full of inspiring game ideas, isn't it?

MeklorIlavator
2008-09-24, 01:44 PM
I'd say Barbarian. He gets very angry (why the hell else would he bite off a man's ear?!), and he's definitely not Lawful.
This is a great concept. The real world is full of inspiring game ideas, isn't it?

If ever there was a candidate for the frenzied berserker, this is it.

AKA_Bait
2008-09-24, 01:49 PM
If ever there was a candidate for the frenzied berserker, this is it.

Oh heck yeah. Man... an adventure is forming in my head already... I'm thinking though that perhaps Michael the Iron shouldn't be the BBEG afterall. I mean, how could we resist using King Donald?

Tokiko Mima
2008-09-24, 01:53 PM
Yeah, he sure does come off as having a God complex saddled with 9000 times normal male aggression/libido levels.

"I think the average person thinks I'm a f**king nut and I deserve whatever happens to me. That's what I believe."

"How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They're just as good as dead."

[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."

He'd probably make a good gestalt Frenzied Berzerker//Unarmed Swordsage/Bloodclaw(bite) Master and he'd work better as a "The Dragon" figure, like everyone has pointed out. He has a simple mind, and all you need is a BBEG to point him to people to kill and he's happy. Having Tyson as the Dragon would allow you to hide your BBEG's powers and identity for quite a while, since you're never going to drag any useful info out of a Raging/Shifted/Frenzied Berzerker, even if you bring them to the point of death.

SurlySeraph
2008-09-24, 02:01 PM
Oh heck yeah. Man... an adventure is forming in my head already... I'm thinking though that perhaps Michael the Iron shouldn't be the BBEG afterall. I mean, how could we resist using King Donald?

:smalleek: Who would the protagonists be? Mother Theresa? Linus Pauling?

TheThan
2008-09-24, 02:06 PM
Haha

Ok Don king has to be the BBEG if Mike Tyson is going to be the Dragon.


and the protagonist: little Joe

Fiendish_Dire_Moose
2008-09-24, 03:12 PM
Okay, what the ****!
Seriously, what the ****? SERIOUSLY!? That guy's a nut.

Oslecamo
2008-09-24, 03:17 PM
Or a Gestalt Unarmed Swordsage//Crusader.

Or a wizard/incantrix who goes around shapechanged 24 hours per day with disguise self on top of it to show muscles and actually defeats his enemies with touch spells who look just like punches. And have badass quotes as verbal components.

AstralFire
2008-09-24, 03:21 PM
Or a wizard/incantrix who goes around shapechanged 24 hours per day with disguise self on top of it to show muscles and actually defeats his enemies with touch spells who look just like punches. And have badass quotes as verbal components.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0vhGEGJC8g
0:54-57

Telonius
2008-09-24, 03:24 PM
Okay, you've motivated me now.

Glass Joe - basic goon. Could be any race. Probably a Commoner with a Monk's Belt.
Von Kaiser - Joe's overseer. Weak rogue.
Piston Honda - Recurring enemy. Has to be a Monk with the flurry of blows feature.
Don Flamenco - also a recurring enemy. Vain and egotistical. Seems like a Bard to me.
King Hippo - Big and scary, but has a combo that will devastate him embarrassingly. Something with a very particular DR, maybe?
Great Tiger - This one has to be a Shadowdancer.
Bald Bull - Minotaur with Overrun. Another recurring.
Soda Popinski - Drunken Master.
Mr. Sandman - Fighter with weapon focus: unarmed. Possibly a Reaping Mauler.
Super Macho Man - Some ridiculously multiclassed thing.

chiasaur11
2008-09-24, 03:25 PM
:smalleek: Who would the protagonists be? Mother Theresa? Linus Pauling?

Richard Feinman, St. Joseph of Cupertino, and Mr. Rodgers.

Telonius
2008-09-24, 03:31 PM
Tyson has no chance against Mr. Rogers. He won the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, you know.

chiasaur11
2008-09-24, 03:37 PM
Tyson has no chance against Mr. Rogers. He won the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, you know.

Didn't say it was fair.

snoopy13a
2008-09-24, 06:20 PM
Tyson would be a monk. He was at his peak when he was training regularly back in the old days. After he whupped Michael Spinks (in a minute and a half) he left his trainer and started to get lazy. After a couple of years, he went crazy.

So, I think Tyson would be best represented as a monk who went chaotic. Sure, he wouldn't be able to advance any more but that would be accurate as his chaotic behavior essentially stalled and eventually destroyed his career.

Rei_Jin
2008-09-24, 06:50 PM
I'd love to combine Mike Tyson and Mr T into one individual, and play that as a character... He starts off as a monk for 6 levels, then takes 4 levels of barbarian, then 10 levels of Warhulk.

Swordguy
2008-09-24, 07:44 PM
I'd love to combine Mike Tyson and Mr T into one individual, and play that as a character... He starts off as a monk for 6 levels, then takes 4 levels of barbarian, then 10 levels of Warhulk.

You need a level of Mohawk in there somewhere to accurately represent Mr. T.

Calinero
2008-09-24, 07:50 PM
Mike Tyson should be the Dragon. The real BBEG would be Mr. Rogers, manipulating everything from behind the scenes.

Since he's so overpowered, he might have to be a friendly NPC instead of a PC, but I think that Chuck Norris would be one of the good guys.

Mr.Bookworm
2008-09-24, 07:51 PM
Hm...

Barb 8/Frenzied Berserker 10, with an alternate unbalanced class feature that gives him a Monk's unarmed strike progression instead of trap sense?

As for race, I'd make him a refluffed Orc.

Nerd-o-rama
2008-09-24, 08:17 PM
Hm...

Barb 8/Frenzied Berserker 10, with an alternate unbalanced class feature that gives him a Monk's unarmed strike progression instead of trap sense?

Still less cheesy than Lion Totem.

Mr.Bookworm
2008-09-24, 08:35 PM
Still less cheesy than Lion Totem.

Well, yeah, but excluding infinite loop tricks, Abrupt Jaunt, half of CC, full spellcasters, Shock Trooper, Archivist cheese, Candle of Invocation, and twenty other things, what isn't? =P

Lycan 01
2008-09-24, 08:46 PM
W...

T...

Eff?




Did... did he really say those things?



Well, I definitely just added a boxer to the list of named Cultists the Investigators will face in my next CoC campaign...

Kaihaku
2008-09-24, 10:11 PM
He's just a mid lvl Monk. Or Improved Unnarmed Strike fighter, which is maybe even worse.

Probably more like a Barbarian brawler.

chiasaur11
2008-09-24, 11:30 PM
Mike Tyson should be the Dragon. The real BBEG would be Mr. Rogers, manipulating everything from behind the scenes.

Since he's so overpowered, he might have to be a friendly NPC instead of a PC, but I think that Chuck Norris would be one of the good guys.

But Mr. Rodgers is Lawful Good!

And Tyson...
Less so.

CabbageTheif
2008-09-25, 07:58 AM
he has a bite attack, that he adds on a full round attack or to a normal when raging. and he can use the two-weapon rend feat with the bite attack. and improved sunder.
what are the rules for called hits? especially on ears?

AstralFire
2008-09-25, 08:50 AM
he has a bite attack, that he adds on a full round attack or to a normal when raging. and he can use the two-weapon rend feat with the bite attack. and improved sunder.
what are the rules for called hits? especially on ears?

There are none. But he might have Favored Enemy (Earful People)

TheCountAlucard
2008-09-25, 08:53 AM
Perhaps a 20% chance to fail spells with verbal components?

Tokiko Mima
2008-09-25, 09:51 AM
It came to me in a dream. Mike Tyson is an awakened (barely)That Damned Crab (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/fw/20040221a) Barbarian/Frenzied Berzerker permanently illusioned to look like a human! It all makes sense now. :smallbiggrin:

AstralFire
2008-09-25, 09:54 AM
It came to me in a dream. Mike Tyson is an awakened (barely)That Damned Crab (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/fw/20040221a) Barbarian/Frenzied Berzerker permanently illusioned to look like a human! It all makes sense now. :smallbiggrin:

You know, I'm not gonna deny his motives are simplistic, but his vocabulary indicates more intellect than he's being given credit for here.

What's the deal with the Damn Crab meme anyway?

Also! Excuse to plug my own photoshop:
http://theanteheroes.com/Humor/BossCrabBattle.png

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-09-25, 09:57 AM
That Damned Crab. (http://wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/fw/20040221a) Look at the stats. Think of the last level 5 or lower party you were in. Combine the 2. If you don't get a TPK, then I may be considered shocked. And remember, it is CR 3. Technically, a party is expected to face 4 of those in a day and win, with no deaths.

AstralFire
2008-09-25, 10:00 AM
Oh. I never looked at the CR.

5, I can see it. 3 is crazy.

Ah well.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-09-25, 10:06 AM
Oh. I never looked at the CR.

5, I can see it. 3 is crazy.

Ah well.A typical 5th level party probably loses one member to it. That's the issue. It can do a Partial Charge and Claw attack in the surprise round, probably hit(+10AB when most Rogues and Wizards of the level have AC 16-18), auto the grapple check(Rogue maybe has +6, probably less, v. +19), lose init, take a few hits, and retreat. The battle will be over in one round, and the party lost a member. That's the issue. It's not that the stats are actually horrid, it's the tactics that are implied by them.

Kaihaku
2008-09-25, 10:10 AM
But Mr. Rodgers is Lawful Good!

Totally Neutral Good.

Will you be my neighbor?

AstralFire
2008-09-25, 10:12 AM
A typical 5th level party probably loses one member to it. That's the issue. It can do a Partial Charge and Claw attack in the surprise round, probably hit(+10AB when most Rogues and Wizards of the level have AC 16-18), auto the grapple check(Rogue maybe has +6, probably less, v. +19), lose init, take a few hits, and retreat. The battle will be over in one round, and the party lost a member. That's the issue. It's not that the stats are actually horrid, it's the tactics that are implied by them.

Remember, some things are intentionally under CRed. It's under CRed too much, but at 5, it'd be a good 'underrated challenge.'

Also, the monsters don't -always- get the surprise rounds. Something like that could very well get surprised.

KillianHawkeye
2008-09-25, 10:38 AM
Hey, there we go - we even have a name for the BBEG. Michael the Iron.

Or else you can call him 'Mr. Dream', but then you have to make him white. :smallamused:

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-09-25, 12:18 PM
Remember, some things are intentionally under CRed. It's under CRed too much, but at 5, it'd be a good 'underrated challenge.'

Also, the monsters don't -always- get the surprise rounds. Something like that could very well get surprised.The surprise round is because it did a partial charge from underwater. Few PCs can make that spot check. And Under-CR'd should not mean a loss of one PC and the escape of the monster, which is what's going to happen to a level 5 party a large majority of the time. No, it won't be a TPK at 5 the way it would be at 4, but it will definitely result in a death. An encounter of the appropriate CR should use up 20% of a party's resources, not 20% of a party's members. And that's after already houseruling the CR up from 3 to 5. It's an insane monster for the level.

AKA_Bait
2008-09-25, 12:26 PM
You need a level of Mohawk in there somewhere to accurately represent Mr. T.

And the gold chains. You can't forget abou Mr. T's bling now.


But Mr. Rodgers is Lawful Good!

Not just that, he's a cleric of a LG deity (he was an ordained Presbyterian minister).


Totally Neutral Good.

Will you be my neighbor?

Oh come on man, he was lawful if ever there was one. He came home every day and did the exact same thing every time right down to when he changes sweater and shoes.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-09-25, 12:27 PM
Oh come on man, he was lawful if ever there was one. He came home every day and did the exact same thing every time right down to when he changes sweater and shoes.But...Bards can't be Lawful...:smallconfused:

AKA_Bait
2008-09-25, 12:30 PM
But...Bards can't be Lawful...:smallconfused:

Why would he be a bard? He was clearly a cleric with a few ranks in Perform: Cute Little Puppets and Perform: Mediocre Singing. No need for bard levels. Besides, even if he had one or two, and then went cleric he would still keep his class features. He just couldn't advance the bard ones anymore.

TeeEl
2008-09-25, 12:31 PM
Or else you can call him 'Mr. Dream', but then you have to make him white. :smallamused:

Hmm. I was going to suggest you could do a Jekyll & Hyde routine with Michael Oneiros and his evil alter-ego Michael the Iron, but that would have Unfortunate Implications due to the differing ethnicities.

Tokiko Mima
2008-09-25, 12:40 PM
But...Bards can't be Lawful...:smallconfused:

If Mr. T can break the rules of World of Warcraft to the extent of making a Mohawk class, then Mr. Rogers most certainly has the ability to shape the dark eldritch forces of raw chaos into a Lawful alignment, and spank the PHB until it allows him to be a bard.

Of course, maybe Mr. Rogers became a bard in his wild frat days and has since settled down into a comfortable Lawful aligned Factotum/Master of All Realities gestalt. That's possible too. :smallbiggrin:

AstralFire
2008-09-25, 12:53 PM
If Mr. T can break the rules of World of Warcraft to the extent of making a Mohawk class, then Mr. Rogers most certainly has the ability to shape the dark eldritch forces of raw chaos into a Lawful alignment, and spank the PHB until it allows him to be a bard.

Kinky.

Tokiko, I still like the way you think.

Necrotheologist
2008-10-03, 11:12 AM
That is an Awesome Idea! I'm gonna have to find a way to use him in my Ptolus game as someone that fights in the Arena. Maybe a fiendish minotaur. But how would I portray his "I just inhaled helium" voice?

Would my players even take him seriously?

Project_Mayhem
2008-10-03, 11:50 AM
You need a level of Mohawk in there somewhere to accurately represent Mr. T.

Surely there must be a homebrew Trollslayer class somewhere ...

AstralFire
2008-10-03, 12:16 PM
Surely there must be a homebrew Trollslayer class somewhere ...

Nah, he just needs Favored Class: Any but Bard.

(...Because Fools were Minstrels which is a- y'know what, forget it.)

NeoVid
2008-10-03, 01:03 PM
Well, if ever there were reasons for mood controlling medications...




Another Tyson quote:

"I'm on this medication to keep from killin' alla y'all!!!"

Jerthanis
2008-10-03, 02:10 PM
That is an Awesome Idea! I'm gonna have to find a way to use him in my Ptolus game as someone that fights in the Arena. Maybe a fiendish minotaur. But how would I portray his "I just inhaled helium" voice?

Would my players even take him seriously?

Make his lines sufficiently twisted and deliver them in the helium-voice, the players will laugh and make fun at first, but when they start realizing he's talking about things he's done before, and things he plans to do... it could be sobering and maybe even a little terrifying.

Kind of like the real Mike Tyson

Talya
2008-10-03, 04:57 PM
You need a level of Mohawk in there somewhere to accurately represent Mr. T.

And make him a night elf.