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bird2234
2008-10-05, 01:55 PM
I'm new to homebrewing, so comments are appreciated!

Krietmeister

Krietmeister
Huge Construct
HD 14d10+40 (117 hp)
Speed 20 ft. (4 squares)
Initiative -1
AC 27; touch 7; flat-footed 27
(-2 Size, -1 Dex, +20 natural)
BAB +10; Grp +27
Attack Slam +17 (2d6+9, 19-20/x2)
Full-Attack Slam +17 (2d6+9, 19-20/x2), 2 Claws +12 (1d8+4, 19-20/x2)
Space 15 ft.; Reach 10 ft.
Special Attacks - Enclose, Improved Grab, Rend 2d8+4
Special Qualities - 60 ft Darkvision, Lowlight Vision
Saves Fort +4 Ref +3 Will +4
Abilities Str 28, Dex 8, Con -, Int -, Wis 11, Cha 1
Skills: -8 to hide
Feats: -
Environment: Any
Solitary
Challenge Rating: 10
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Chaotic Neutral
Advancement: 14-17 HD (Huge), 18 - 20 (Gargantuan)
Level Adjustment -


You hear a horrible screeching sound as massive figure leaps into view. It stands fifteen feet tall, and it appears to be vaguely humanoid in shape. Six mechanical arms ending with vicious claws shift slowly to reveal a gaping maw in its metal chest, and it approaches you, showing no signs of intelligence.

Krietmeisters are warmachines created by ancient engineers and burried along with their creators. Krietmeisters would follow commands of only their master, and with their master dead, they lack purpose, and are slowly twisted by time. When they are found by adventurers, even the ones that have only been there for a few hundred years are a bit sour, and the ancient ones are forces that are not to be reckoned with.

Krietmeisters are golems, essentially, with six spider-like legs protruding from their chest, and each one of these legs ends with mechanical claws. Every Krietmeister has an exposed core, and they attempt to feed as many enemies as possible during combat. Victims are almost never seen again once they are 'devoured'.

Krietmeisters cannot speak, and while they do understand Common, they almost never respond when they are spoken to. Krietmeisters weight around 8 tons and stand about fifteen feet tall.

Combat

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, a Krietmeister must first hit on a Slam attack. The Krietmeister may then attempt a grapple check as a free action without provoking attacks of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold.

Enclose (Ex): On the turn following an Improved Grab, a Krietmeister may choose to open a compartment in its chest behind its mechanical claws and 'feed' its victim into its dangerous mechanical core. The Krietmeister must then attempt a +5 attack roll. If it succeeds, the victim takes 1d6+4 damage per turn. The victim can choose to attack the core of the Kreitmeister from the inside. If the victim deals 15 total damage to the Kreitmeister's core, he/she may escape to a square adjacent to the Krietmeister. If the Krietmeister dies while the victim is inside, the victim takes 1d6+4 damage when as the construct falls, and may then escape.

Rend (Ex): If a Krietmeister hits with both its slam attack and its claws, it rends its enemy for an automatic 2d8+4 damage.

Construct
- Krietmeisters are immune to poison, sleep effects, paralysis, stunning, disease, death effects, and necromancy effects.
-Not subject to critical hits, nonlethal damage, ability damage, ability drain, fatigue, exhaustion, or energy drain.
-Immunity to any effect that requires a Fortitude save (unless the effect also works on objects, or is harmless).
-Not at risk of death from massive damage. Immediately destroyed when reduced to 0 hit points or less.
- Krietmeisters cannot be raised, as they were never alive to begin with.

Bhu
2008-10-06, 06:16 AM
Welcome to critter making!

A few nitpicks: Constructs get an hp bonus based on Size. It should read 8d10+40 (76 hp)

A regular Iron Golem is 18 Hit Dice at Size Class large. You might wanna consider upping this unless it’s meant to be less powerful.

Initiative should be –1 (dex is only an 8)

AC should be 13 (-2 Size, -1 Dex, +6 Natural)
This is easily hittable. You’ll want to increase the Natural Armor Bonus (an iron golem has +22)

You forgot the –2 Size Penalty on attack rolls, Slam should be +7, Claws +2

Only the Primary attack (the Slam) gets full Strength bonus, which in this case is a +3, the claws would get half rounded down, or +1

Damage for attacks is a lil high (1d8 to 2d6 is more normal for huge)

Saves should be Fort +2, Ref +1, Will –2 (the low Wisdom gives it a –4 to Will Saves)

Stats: 16 Str is awful low for Huge, it should be nearly twice that. Is the construct Mindless? If it is then it shouldn’t have an Int score. If it does have an Int Score it should have 3 Feats (no Feats if its Mindless) and 11 Skill Points (minimum of 1 point per hit die, x4 for the first Hit die, even after negative Int penalties)

Almost all Golems have Wis 11, Cha 1 (this avoids Will Save penalties)

Enclose sounds an awful lot like the Swallow Whole attack

Rend does 2d6+4 or 1d6+4 depending on the description or the block entry

I’ll leave CR for later.. Right now 7 is much too hi though



The flavor is kewl though. Kiteh like Spider golems.

bird2234
2008-10-06, 09:06 PM
Bhu has spoken! It was your homebrew stuff that made me want to give it a go. :smallbiggrin:



A few nitpicks...

Thanks for the review! I went through and changed everything you listed, but there may still be some flaws because I did it in fifteen minutes (in between studying, SSATs are in a week!)
I'm going to take some time later and self-correct what I can.


The flavor is kewl though. Kiteh like Spider golems.

Kitteh likes the fluff!

Fako
2008-10-06, 10:00 PM
Looks good, but there are still some errors:

How many claw attacks does it get on a full attack? Does it get 6 (one for each arm)?

With the adjusted hit die, the saves & BAB are adjusted. The BAB is +10 now, Fort +4, Ref +3, Will +4.

Being mindless, it doesn't get any skill points.

The improved strength adjusted the attacks. Slam is now a +17, Claws are now +12. Also, the bonus damage from a high Strength score needs to be added in. For slam, it's "Slam +17 (2d6+9,19-20/x2)" and claws are "Claws +12 (1d8+4,19-20/x2)".

Rend should now do 1d6+9.

Grapple is +27.

I agree that Enclose is a lot like the Swallow Whole (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/specialAbilities.htm#swallowWhole) special attack...

I can't comment on CR, because I have a hard time with that... I use Vorpal Tribble's method for calculating CR:
Originally Posted by The Vorpal Tribble
1. Divide its average HP by 4.5 to 6, 4.5 for 5 HD or lower, 5 for 6-10 HD, 5.5 for 11-15 HD, 6 for 16-20 HD.
2. Add 1 for each five points above 10 its AC is, minusing 1 for every 5 below.
3. Add 1 for each special attack (+2 to +5 or more if its got a decent number of spells in its spell-like abilities).
4. Add 1 for each quality unless you deem it worthy of more. Add 1 for each resistance and 10 points of DR it has, and 2 for each immunity.
5. Add 1 for every two bonus feats it has.
6. Divide by 3.


I like the idea, especially the image of this thing charging at the party and swallowing the unsuspecting mages. :belkar: I hope you do more work :D

Lappy9000
2008-10-06, 10:30 PM
I'm new to homebrewing, so comments are appreciated!

Critmeister

You hear a horrible screeching sound as massive figure rolls into view. It stands twenty feet tall, and it appears to be vaguely icosagonical in shape. Covered in mysterious numbered runes, it approaches you, showing no signs of intelligence.

Critmeisters are one of the most dangerous creatures in existance. The universal fear attributed to them stems from their ability to always roll natural twenties. On everything.

Fixed for awesomeness :smallcool:

Seriously, though, not bad for a first try!

Bhu
2008-10-07, 06:56 AM
Bhu has spoken! It was your homebrew stuff that made me want to give it a go. :smallbiggrin:



Thanks for the review! I went through and changed everything you listed, but there may still be some flaws because I did it in fifteen minutes (in between studying, SSATs are in a week!)
I'm going to take some time later and self-correct what I can.



Kitteh likes the fluff!

Yay I'm inspiring!! I had to work a 14 hour day today, but wil give nother review soon as I can.

Zeta Kai
2008-10-07, 08:22 AM
Critmeister

You hear a horrible screeching sound as massive figure rolls into view. It stands twenty feet tall, and it appears to be vaguely icosagonical in shape. Covered in mysterious numbered runes, it approaches you, showing no signs of intelligence.

Critmeisters are one of the most dangerous creatures in existance. The universal fear attributed to them stems from their ability to always roll natural twenties. On everything.

Lappy, that's even more aesome than the original. It's so brilliant that I'm amazed nobody's done it before. I mean, think about it: your party is attacked by a giant construct in the shape of a D20. Wicked cool.

bird2234
2008-10-08, 09:20 AM
Natural Twenties (Ex): Critmeisters may use this ability after any roll they make that does not result in a natural 20. They may change the roll to a natural 20.

Lorien077
2008-10-08, 01:49 PM
Yooooooink! Just the monster I needed for my steampunkish DnD 3.5 campaign: Everything but the Kitchen Sink. So thanks a ton, I was worrying about clockwork monstrosities. :)

Bhu
2008-10-09, 05:03 AM
Natural Twenties (Ex): Critmeisters may use this ability after any roll they make that does not result in a natural 20. They may change the roll to a natural 20.

Unless you limit the number of times per day, overpowered.

You dont take a size penalty to Move Silently checks, just Hide (weird aint' it?? I've never figured that one out).

Rend usually does double claw damage if it's based on claws.

A Clay Golem is the same CR, but it has Damage Reduction, and some immunity to magic (actually most GOlems do).


Does it have Berserk problems like other Golems do??


I still love the idea of a spider Golem :D

DracoDei
2008-10-09, 06:29 AM
Bhu... err... you DO realize that that is a completely different monster that just happens to have an similar/identical sounding name? That would be its core ability, and as such, I think the CR could be built around it being at will... and it is a joke creature anyway... Of course, limited times per day could also work... but I think it would be funnier if it was unlimited...

Bhu
2008-10-11, 05:26 AM
I realize it now..

My doctor is experimenting with the doses of my medication lately. Between that and working late hours I'm a little messed up by the time I read posts sometimes here lately...