Pessimistic Prediction Pit.

[mlsq42]

Simply put, this is a place for you to put in your most pessimistic, saddest and above all evil predictions here. The ideas you've suspected but can't say anywhere else on the board for fear of being a downer.

Well, mainly it's just me but whatever.

V I'll leave since that's a well beaten horse.

But Durkon will return to his homelands after his death... as a Zombie in Xykon's army.

And Elan will get a happy ending... he dies happy after saving Haley's life.

Any others?

[Euron]

Sam Beckett Roy never makes it home gets resurrected.

[DBear]

Elan and Haley never see each other again. This is possibly foreshadowed in #483. (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0483.html)

[Liwen]

Haley's daddy gets killed minutes before Haley herself, both died because of Belkar. V arrives and zaps Belkar to get epic level, pounder Xykon in dust and take her rightfull seat aside Emperor Redcloak has Queen of the Snarl.

PS : The bad guys win, forever.

That's pesismist enough for your tastes?

[Flickerdart]

V and the Snarl do the fusion dance and cast over nine thousand spells for massive damage. Ridge racer.

[Needle]

From first to last to die.

Belkar: When V finds Haley, Belkar accidentaly pukes the wizard, signing his dead.

Celia: Because she can't withstand violence, she criticize V to much and gets zapped by V.

Vaarsuvius: After regrouping and resurrecting Roy, the fighter changes his priority and heads for the elf, who abandoned Haley when she was reunited with the group.

And well, I can't forsee that much (or think about another reasonable death =P), but I don't think any of these events will happen, except Belkar dying first, whatever the means.

[Squeeck]

When the Order finally gets together, Elan tells Haley that he cannot be with her anymore. He cannot put Haley's happines over someone else's life, and has determined that the 'Therkla incident' won't happen again.

No, I did not ship Therkla & Elan, but I've had doubts about Haley & Elan from the start. What does she SEE in him, anyway? He makes her laugh? Sorry, I did not buy that with Jessica & Roger Rabbit, and I'm not buying it here either.

[Jan Mattys]

When the Order finally gets together, Elan tells Haley that he cannot be with her anymore. He cannot put Haley's happines over someone else's life, and has determined that the 'Therkla incident' won't happen again.

No, I did not ship Therkla & Elan, but I've had doubts about Haley & Elan from the start. What does she SEE in him, anyway? He makes her laugh? Sorry, I did not buy that with Jessica & Roger Rabbit, and I'm not buying it here either.

Actually, in strict technical terms, Elan is the hot one here...
He might not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but sure he is attractive.

So the Roger Rabbit analogy doesn't really apply.

[paddyfool]

Most pessimistic: That the end of the strip is the Snarl breaking free, destroying everything, killing everybody. And that somehow, it's all the Order's fault.

Slightly less pessimistic:
-V is now a Lich, recruits help from Hell via Qarr to seek further power, goes after one of the other gates for him/herself. Ends up joining Linear Guild on pretence of being own evil clone.
-Haley and her nemesis kill each other, after Haley is sold out by the cleric of Loki, who turns out to be Hilga. Belkar dies too. They all get made into golems by Grubwiggler.
-Roy never does get resurrected.
-The Azure City-ites never manage to find/found a new home, and Elan and Durkon never manage to get back to saving the world; eventually, Durkon is killed, and Elan brings his body home to the dwarven lands.
-Redcloak hires Linear Guild, gets Monster-In-The-Darkness on-side, destroys Xykon, captures a gate, and takes over the world. Goblins rule.

Caveat: I don't actually think any of the above will happen.

[Nerdanel]

Xykon and Redcloak unleash the Snarl on Mount Celestia. Eric Greenhilt, Sara Greenhilt, and everyone else in the Lawful Good afterlife from the highest gods to paladin mounts like Windstriker is forever erased from existence.

[BobVosh]

Actually, in strict technical terms, Elan is the hot one here...
He might not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but sure he is attractive.

So the Roger Rabbit analogy doesn't really apply.

I'm with him. Not to mention Elan has everything Haley seems to want for herself; openness, niceness, etc. Only two things lacking is Int and Wis.

I can beat that "ultimate pessimistic" ya got there:

The Giant has something happen to him so he can't/won't finish the comic. I could predict what...but that seems unnessacarily dark.

In comic:
Dominate on Haley to become his queen from Xykon.

Meh, not feeling too creative.

[Squeeck]

Actually, in strict technical terms, Elan is the hot one here...
He might not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but sure he is attractive.

So the Roger Rabbit analogy doesn't really apply.

Partially true. I think I was meaning what BESIDES the Cha 18? Any qualities for longer term relationship, that sort of thing.

Have we even seen on-screen Elan tell Haley how he feels? The other way round, yes, but has Elan actually confessed anything? The best I can recall is 'Want to make out?' (although my memoryis fuzzy here...)

[Shadic]

He told her that he loves her right before the separate in Azure City.

[RMS Oceanic]

How about I combine pessimistic with Shaggy Dog tendencies?

Loki, Tiamat and Rat had their own plans for the rifts, and their minions succeed in actually controlling the snarl two minutes before anybody else gets to the final gate. World is re-aligned to be evil, and everybody is divinely retooled as level 1 commoners.

[Avilan the Grey]

Partially true. I think I was meaning what BESIDES the Cha 18? Any qualities for longer term relationship, that sort of thing.

Well appart from the obvious joke "What? I don't understand the problem?"

...He's got honesty, openness, niceness... Most things women say they want in a relationship.

[Scatman]

Vaarsuvius attains ultimate arcane power, destroying the very fabric of existence and ending the comic.

Wait, I think that was too pessimistic.

[Mauve Shirt]

600 is a splash page cliffhanger, and Rich never updates ever again.

[Lamech]

Alright then evil predictions...
-Xykon comes up with his own plan to manipulate the gates. He absorbs Snarls power into himself, slaughtering the gods and rules the multiverse turning it into a horrible hell. Forever.
-Elan is turned to evil by magic, and becomes a happy member of Xykons team evil.
- Tsukiko dies.
- OotS gets to the first gate and is hit by several attacks strong enough to TPK them in round one.
- Redcloak never gets goblin equality.


I'm pretty sure most of the stuff won't be quite this bad, now if their is a downer ending, I'm betting it will just end up something like
-Haley and Elan die, the happy ending is in heaven.
- Recloak win the gate Dark One rules the world, hopefully stomping Xykon into the groud as his first action.
Possible downer endings for the order...
- OotS is slaughtered at the final gate, they are simply no match for any single member of team evil, and team evil actually sticks together. OR They get stomped by something random; A samantha without family strife, a intelligent pit fiend, something like that wipes out the order. Perhaps they get overwhelmed by some super-soilder type of team evil. (Hobgob casters, wights, summoned demons.

[Bedinsis]

It turns out that the oracle can't really see the future, he only has complete knowledge to the future if he acts in a particular way. The future he knows has the Order eventually defeating Xykon.

However, "his" known future required that Roy didn't remember anything apart from the prophesies in their latest encounter. The future, as it will come to be, involves the Snarl getting released and unmaking everything. Including Elan.

[Shatteredtower]

Xykon will never be reunited with his dog.

[Mercenary Pen]

Let's see...

Haley's father dies of starvation moments before she turns up with the money to free him- and she doesn't get given a refund on his release fee.
Bone Golem Roy gets encased in Full Plate and helmet so that pieces of his remains cannot be easily removed from the structure of said golem- and the rattling thing in Roy's boot turns out to be nothing more than a pebble. Moreover, Bone Golem Roy kills Celia.
Mr. Scruffy kills Belkar for puking on him one time too many- then proceeds to eat Belkar's corpse because they've run out of cat food.
Vaarsuvius never finds the correct four words, let alone any of the other prerequisites.

[Setra]

The Giant has something happen to him so he can't/won't finish the comic. I could predict what...but that seems unnessacarily dark.
There should be limits on pessimism :smallfrown:

[TheBST]

Mr. Burlew finally cracks and gives it all up to become a trucker. The final panel he leaves us is a scan of crudely drawn stick figures with swords giving the reader the finger.

[Setra]

I've got a contender for most pessimistic.

Mookie takes over the comic.

[Lira]

I've got a contender for most pessimistic.

Mookie takes over the comic.Oh gods no. No no no no. That's just too awful to think about.

[Blue Ghost]

Qarr possesses Kazumi's baby, making it an Unholy Scion, who becomes the new main villain of the comic.

[drengnikrafe]

As it turns out, all of this was really a dream. When you type in "www.giantitp.com" tomorrow, the internet will tell you no such thing exists. After much studying, you find out that it was all a big dream. None of this really happened.

You then try to start the webcomic in real life, but a bunch of Spooooky lawyers sent by the wizard from the coast put you in an insane asylum where your roommate is Cthulhu.

[Cleverdan22]

Partially true. I think I was meaning what BESIDES the Cha 18? Any qualities for longer term relationship, that sort of thing.

Have we even seen on-screen Elan tell Haley how he feels? The other way round, yes, but has Elan actually confessed anything? The best I can recall is 'Want to make out?' (although my memoryis fuzzy here...)
Pureness, the ability to see good where others don't, that sort of thing. Haley built her whole life on mistrust and lying, it makes sense that someone could fall in love with a person with those qualities. Plus, Elan is, by definition, GOOD. Have you ever seen him do something terrible, or even particularly mean?

Also, for pessimistic prediction: V becomes a bad guy, and Haley is forced to take him down.

[Kranden]

A super Volcano erupts and destroys the world!

Now that's Pessimistic

[chiasaur11]

As it turns out, all of this was really a dream. When you type in "www.giantitp.com" tomorrow, the internet will tell you no such thing exists. After much studying, you find out that it was all a big dream. None of this really happened.

You then try to start the webcomic in real life, but a bunch of Spooooky lawyers sent by the wizard from the coast put you in an insane asylum where your roommate is Cthulhu.

So, the comic existed, but it disappeared, like in those Twilight Zone episodes, or you just ticked off a legal team somehow?

Anyway, considering Cthulhu is so manic-depressive he sleeps for aeons on end, I figure I don't have much to worry about if I remember my tinfoil hat.

[drengnikrafe]

So, the comic existed, but it disappeared, like in those Twilight Zone episodes, or you just ticked off a legal team somehow?

Anyway, considering Cthulhu is so manic-depressive he sleeps for aeons on end, I figure I don't have much to worry about if I remember my tinfoil hat.

Well, I suppose I can tell you, since you're just a figment of my imagination that will disappear tomorrow, and this is the last night I can play on these forums.

The comic never existed, only in your dreams. The lawyers come after you because you are infringing on things that supposedly already existed.

Also, in this pessimistic point of view, Cthulhu is not as you know him. He's awake all the time.

[chiasaur11]

Well, I suppose I can tell you, since you're just a figment of my imagination that will disappear tomorrow, and this is the last night I can play on these forums.

The comic never existed, only in your dreams. The lawyers come after you because you are infringing on things that supposedly already existed.

Also, in this pessimistic point of view, Cthulhu is not as you know him. He's awake all the time.

So he's taking his medications!

Good on him.

[AMJ]

Most pessimistic prediction is that Rich for undisclosed reasons decided to stop the comic. No updates no maintenance n nothing. After a couple of weeks even the hardcore fans do not come by to check daily and after 3 months no one checks anymore, the story doesn't end there is no explanation...

Oh man it has happended more than once with (web)comics that I liked.

- AMJ

[Linkavitch]

- Tsukiko dies.


How is that pessimistic, exactly?

I agree with the Rich Burlew never updates after #600 people. That wold be really bad.