Beyond the Magic Portal

[Beholder1995]

Beholder pops through a glowing purple portal and looks around, rather astonished.

He seems in a clearing in the midst of a jungle. There's clearly a dirt path leading into the shadowy vegetation. Things here are... wierd. A massive green gas giant looms in a pink sky. Strange birds fly overhead. Tropical and temperate trees mingle in the same forest. The leaves are green and orange striped. Some are red and blue. Things are just... wierd.

He waits for Lupy and Joel.

[Nevitan]

Joel comes through and casts him epic level abjuration spell and then Protection from arrows.

[Lupy]

Lupy pops through, wearing some mid 1800s style explorer clothes. And carrying his crozier.

A lesser god won't have enough power to do much for you like an intermediate or greater god would.

[Beholder1995]

As soon as Lupy comes through, the portal closes. There is a slot machine, identical to the one in the Inn, sitting on a plate of steel where the portal closes.

Well, I guess we know how to get back. :smalltongue:

Onwards!

Beholder heads down the path. A shocker lizard scurries across the clearing briefly.

[Nevitan]

you sound a bit power hungry Lupy.:smallamused:

I might Do a Indiana Joel avatar for this.

[Beholder1995]

That'd be sweet! :smallbiggrin:

Pillars of multicolored smoke trail into the sky above the strange canopy.

Come on, now, fellows. I'm only in this mood very rarely. :smalltongue:

[Lupy]

Why would I work for a god whom myself and a couple of good friends could use as a mop? Lupy is follow Beholder, using his crozier to knock aside annoying brush.

[Nevitan]

stay cautious Baron, those might be prismatic walls...
Joel continues on slowly.
maybe you believe in the cause?
why do you follow Ignus?

[Lupy]

Nothing we can't handle. Wish I had my mitre with me...

I owe Ignus my life several times over, I'm a pyromaniac, I have worked for him my entire life, and without him I would be living at home. I owe him, but I also love him.

[Beholder1995]

The path is dirt and quite clear. The tree trunks are surprisingly far-spaced, but descend into darkness rather abruptly. Strange squeaks and animalistic noises come from all directions.

Deadtime. Continue this tommorow.

[Lupy]

Hmm, Lupy deadtimes too then. I won't be on 'til Tuesday though. :smallfrown:

[Nevitan]

are we all going to be on tomorrow?
Curse you! curse you both:smalltongue:
I think we are all in the same-ish tome zone.
Well couldn't someone just worship someone for they're cause?
Azuth did trap a god in his staff, and that was before he ascended

[Lupy]

If more gods had causes the heavens would never be at peace Joel. I love Ignus, but he, and most other gods, has the reasoning skills of my staff.

Tell me more about Azuth?

[Nevitan]

Well back when He was a mortal he was the first and Original Magistrate, the most powerful Mage to exist in his own time, and he got into a feud with Savras, a Dark god of magic. Their battles went on and off for Years until Azuth crafted a Artifact of a staff, then he trapped Savras in it. a Little while after that Mystra helped him ascend to Godhood.

[Lupy]

He's holding a god in his staff!?!?! Lupy's eyes are wide with horror. He brings his crozier into a defensive position.

[Nevitan]

Well. he did for a while, until Savra's Friend Velsharoon Helped him escape from it.

[Lupy]

Was that Joel talking?

[Nevitan]

Er, yeah, forgot to color it.

[Lupy]

Oh.

He lowers the staff.

So he ascended afterwords?

[Nevitan]

He captured Savra's Existence in the staff, ascended, and then had the soul stolen back.

[Lupy]

I see. Sounds a bit like what happened to Tel'anor... I take it you are his high priest?

[Nevitan]

huh?
Oh, no. I haven't even decided weather to Join him or not yet, But I doubt that I would rank as the High priest.

[Quinsar]

'Cept Telanor entirely destroyed the god...

[Lupy]

Lupy-logic =/= Logic. Deadtime for pie. :smallbiggrin:

Oh.

[Nevitan]

Yeah, I can tell you more about him
But I have to deadtime for tonight, see you Tuesday then.

[Beholder1995]

They come to a crossroads. In the middle is a tree with a multitude of wooden signs hanging from it. A pair of blue goblins go down the left path just as our group arrives. The signs say this:

Somewhere >
Nowhere <
Someplace Rather Different <
Someplace So Different from Somewhere or Nowhere that we Had to Go off the Sign to Say its Name <
Salad Bar & Bandstand >
Super Mario World <
Castle Conundrum and Temple Adventure >
Chicago <

Beholder seems taken aback by the multitude of choices.

Goodness... which way do we take? :smalleek:

There's the sound of hearty band music coming from the right path...

[Nevitan]

Well, everyone knows Goblins are stupid, so We can just go right as they went left.

[Beholder1995]

Maybe... we should try the right path.

[Lupy]

I've never been to Nowhere... Let's go.

[Beholder1995]

Lupy, 'nowhere' implies that there is nothing to do there. :smalltongue::smallsigh:

I mean, think about it- it looks like all the really interesting stuff is down the right path.... look- a castle, a lost temple... even a salad bar!

[Nevitan]

Yeah, we should probably go right...
We need a party name...
How about the orange texted heroes?

[Lupy]

He didn't mean it fourth wall! He didn't mean it!

I vote that we call ourselves the Viators.

[Nevitan]

viators?
Like Via.. Tours?
Er.. what?

What happened to your Avatar Lupy? :smallconfused::smalltongue:

[FireFox]

*sticks head in to remind Loopy Lupy of the H/H*
*steals Beholder's tophat*
*leaves silently*

[Lupy]

I like this avatar. It describes me instead of Lupy.

It means travelers in my native tongue. Yeah, he speaks Latin, he also looks Eutruscan, so it makes sense.

[Nevitan]

It describes a whole lot of people here:smalltongue:.

I dunno, Doesn't really strike fear into the hearts of our enemies...

[Lupy]

The fact that I'm a fire elemental, you're a necromancer, and he's a Beholder kind of means they'd be scared if we were called the breakfast cereal o's

[Nevitan]

How about a... Well, I don't know much that could stand up to us, but If our reputation preceded us nothings going to worry about 'the travelers'

[Lupy]

Hmm... What about... The Filiolus? It means godsent...

[Nevitan]

That might Work, though I don't much think the Baron is very influenced by the gods will...

[Beholder1995]

Hmmm... I'm at a loss, frankly. And yes, Lupy. I'm less than religious. Much less to one of your gods...

Do we really need a team name? :smallconfused::smalltongue:

[Nevitan]

Of course we Do!
Its... essential and such.

[Beholder1995]

Does Indiana Jones have a team name? Did any great explorers from history have team names? It just seems rather cornball, frankly...

Then again, this is TOWN...

[Nevitan]

Doctor Jones Also Didn't have anyone who stayed on his team for more than on movie... I mean adventure.

[Beholder1995]

I suppose that's true.

We could be Team Monocle, but I'm only a third of the team... what do we all have in common? :smallconfused:

[Nevitan]

Orange text...

Well... We all own property:smallconfused:

[Beholder1995]

You have beige text...

Er... I mean... so, what? We call ourselves Team Landowner? :smallconfused:

[Nevitan]

Its sandy Brown, thats Orangeish

How about..the proprietary brotherhood?

[Beholder1995]

No, it's brownish.

That sounds like some kind of religious cult. :smallyuk:

[Quinsar]

Psst! Beholder! Gill's Manison! Plot time!

[Nevitan]

Your Brownish

Meh, they'll be afraid of our implied Size.

[Beholder1995]

What about... team... Town?

This is a foreign dimension, after all...

[Nevitan]

thats Kinda... Bland.

[Beholder1995]

Better than team 'Proprietary Brotherhood'. :smalltongue::smallannoyed:

What about... The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen!

If you get that reference, then you get a cookie. Deadtime soon. Be off for an hour-ish.

[Nevitan]

That movie was a bit... odd.
Forks and Such...

but your not a gentleman, your a.. gentlebeholder...

[Beholder1995]

Well, let's hear YOU throw out some ideas! :smallmad:

[Nevitan]

how about... the Caster's biweekly Other planetary expedition team?

[Beholder1995]

That... actually... sounds good.

Let's go with that! The CBOPET... has a nice ring to it...

[Nevitan]

the
see
bee
oh
pee
Ee
tee?

Or the See boh pet?

[Beholder1995]

...

Maybe we should just abbreviate it as the Biweekly Expedition Team.

Or BET! That works, because we came out of a slot machine! Aha, you see! It's brilliant!

[Nevitan]

Aha!
Indeed the meeting of intellectuals proves noticeably useful.

[Beholder1995]

Good show! :smallbiggrin::smallamused:

So, from now on... these little excursions will be those of... the Biweekly Expedition Team!!!

[Nevitan]

but what if someone else comes in through the slot machine?

[Beholder1995]

Hmm... we shall befriend the natives and tell them to annihilate anyone not accompanied by us. :smallamused:

Beholder looks from left to right.

So are we going down a path or not?

[Nevitan]

should we wait for the archbishop?

[Beholder1995]

Beholder looks at the deadtimed Lupy.

Yeah... I guess... :smallsigh:

There is the sound of footsteps coming from the left path.

[Nevitan]

Joel casts Greater invisibility on himself and the archbishop.

[Beholder1995]

A miniature bipedal elephant comes strolling down the path, chatting with a purple, winged and beaked creature. They bump into Beholder.

Oh, I say! :smalleek:

Terribly sorry, terribly sorry...

It's uh... okay... :smallconfused:

Both creatures have thick english accents.

[Nevitan]

Joel uses a telepathy spell to converse with beholder
I dare say we've stumbled upon Dr. Suess's childhood vacation spot...

[Beholder1995]

I daresay you may be right... :smalleek:

Er... can either of you give us some information about this place?

The elephant looks around, confused.

What place? :smallconfused:

Indeed, there are a multitude of places in this place. :smallconfused:

Nev, you have tempted me to start doing everything in rhyme.

[Nevitan]

Place place and place only Rhyme in strict following of the Term.

They must not be very smart, they didn't catch one person calling himself an 'us'

[Beholder1995]

I know that, you doof. I'm TEMPTED to start doing it. I wasn't trying to do it right then. :smalltongue:

Heh.

Well... where am I?..

You're at the sign tree. :smallconfused:

[Nevitan]

Hey, I'm no 'doof' you... 'goober'?:smallconfused::smalltongue:

I'm gonna blast them...

[Beholder1995]

Please don't. I'd rather not get on bad terms with an entire world FILLED WITH MONSTERS.

Well, er... thank you? :smallconfused:

No problem, no problem at all, my good man! :smallbiggrin:

They wave and trot down the right path.

Where a huge venus flytrap lunges out of the vegetation and swallows them both.

And changes color in the process.

As a roc flies high overhead.

And the sky changes from pink to blue.

[Nevitan]

It seems the super mario world is closer than the sigh let on...

[Beholder1995]

Well, at least the sky is a normal color now... :smallconfused:

Sparse white clouds are appearing.

[Nevitan]

this place is Weird.
where did that slot machine come from anyway?

[Beholder1995]

I don't know... it just appeared one day. :smallconfused:

Deadtime. But don't stop working on that avvie.

[Nevitan]

Oh yea, I'd better start that...

[Beholder1995]

Beholder wakes up and kicks Lupy's deadtimed body.

Nope. Still deadtimed. :smallsigh:

He looks around to see if Joel is up. It's still dark in the jungle, and rather humid and cold.

[Nevitan]

Joel had casts Mordenkiaden's Magnificent mansion for the night.

((Only here fo rlike 5 more minutes, will deadtime with out notice))

[Beholder1995]

Beholder glares.

JOEL!!!! WAKE UP!!! IT'S SEVEN A.M!!!

[Nevitan]

Joel walks out
and now its three

[Nevitan]

Joel undeadtimes
And now its seven thirty.

[Beholder1995]

Beholder shudders as he undeadtimes abruptly.

AH! Oh... goodness... :smalleek:

he looks up.

Huh. I guess you're right... that went by fast... :smallconfused:

[Nevitan]

Maybe for you >.>

I think the Archbishop undeadtimed around five, but we weren't here.

[Beholder1995]

Curses...

So are we just stuck at this junction until the weekend, or what? :smallconfused::smallsigh:

[Nevitan]

I'm not sure, At worst we could drag Lupy with us...

[Beholder1995]

No... I don't think...

he looks around conspiratorially.

I don't think his player would like that...

[Nevitan]

Oh, it'd be fine. He wouldn't want to impede the process of Bet...

[Beholder1995]

Actually, I have to deadtime soon anyway, so I'd rather not do anything yet... :smallsigh:

Well, I suppose-

Beholder abruptly goes that familiar shade of deadtimed gray.

[Nevitan]

Stupid schedules

[Lupy]

I'm awake now! And I challenge you, just try and drag me. :smallamused: Give it a good shot sometime.

[Nevitan]

Joel Shapechanges into a titan
Oh yea?

[Lupy]

Lupy floats up to be at face level.

The Baron's gone and deadtimed, hasn't he? :smallsigh:

[Nevitan]

'fraid so..

[Lupy]

We could push him. :smallwink:

[Nevitan]

He is all floaty...

But he is sort of the DM here...

[Lupy]

Who's idea was it to give our players these semblences of lives?

My school band played today.

[Nevitan]

No Idea.

Oh yeah?

[Lupy]

Hmm... Now what?

The 7th grade screwed us up, badly.

[Nevitan]

Well, We could go down the left path, and come back when The baron undeadtimes.

Heh

[Lupy]

You wanna do that? Or should my player go read Sarum?

[Nevitan]

Dunno, My layer has a friend over and he probably wants to hang out...

[Lupy]

Okay, deadt- Lupy turns deadtime gray. :smalltongue:

[Nevitan]

ok then

See you later Lupy.

[Beholder1995]

Hmm... Now what?

The 7th grade screwed us up, badly.

Damn those seventh graders! :smalltongue:

My band may or may not end up playing the National Anthem at Fenway park... :smallbiggrin:


~-~

Beholders stirs.

[Nevitan]

You missed the archbishop, and I'm going to have to go back to studying my spells in about.. four minutes.

[Beholder1995]

That's fine, because I have to deadtime for about six ho-

Abrupt deadtime!!!

[Nevitan]

Done with my spells....
Is this ever going anywhere?:smallsigh:

[Beholder1995]

I honestly don't know... :smallsigh:

[Nevitan]

*grumble grumble*archbishop*grumble Grumble*

[Beholder1995]

So... I guess we ARE stuck here until the weekend. :smallsigh:

[Nevitan]

*kicks ground*
:smallsigh:

[Beholder1995]

It's not like you don't have other characters... :smallconfused::smalltongue:

[Nevitan]

http://i337.photobucket.com/albums/n365/b_nebb/ConcordantKiller.png
That flys in and attempts to stab Beholder.

[Beholder1995]

w00t!

Holy-!

Beholder rather nimbly rolls out of the way.

Die!

He fires a series of disintegrate beams at it.

[Nevitan]

The Contradict Killer dissipates in a pillar of smoke and come out to the left of Beholder shooting scorching Rays at him.

[Beholder1995]

He is schorched and bounds out of the way, screeching.

He casts Flesh to Stone on the Killer. Multiple times. Until it fails its save.

[Nevitan]

It flies at him with the sword above his head and gets ready to swing, then turns to stone, and falls over towards Beholder.

[Beholder1995]

He rolls out of the way; rather easy for a spherical creature, then fires a disintegrate beam at it.

[Nevitan]

The statue turns to dusk.

[Beholder1995]

Beholder does a victory jig.

[Nevitan]

Four more contradict killers sneak attack him:smalltongue:

[Beholder1995]

Beholder deadtimes as I focus my attention elsewhere... but I will continue to check my PM inbox.

[Lupy]

Lupy undeadtimes.

[FireFox]

Since I'm bored, and it's implied that Umbris spends most of his time literally as Lupy's shadow... the Sheikah appears here and stretches.

[Lupy]

Hello Umbris.

Check out my pretty incredibly awesome and macho new avvies. :smallbiggrin:

[FireFox]

*cough* Um, Lupy, I am FF: I see everything.

Greetings sir.

[Lupy]

Do you know what I just realized?

[FireFox]

Something about how the town is some kind of nexus for everyone and anyone who was ever important ever?

[Lupy]

Yes. And that I've never paid you... We have to take care of that as soon as I get back.

[FireFox]

I could have sworn we discussed how I don't require payment... :smallconfused:

[Lupy]

Well... To be honest I have a hard time remembering things before Terus and friends got a hold on me sometimes, but I can't believe I'm not paying you. :smallfrown:

[FireFox]

I wouldn't accept anything. I can sustain myself quite easily, and this is something I like doing...

[Lupy]

I need to pay you though, I pay all my employees. And technically you are an employee.

[FireFox]

Umbris rolls his eyes.

[Lupy]

Surely you must need something. Everdeep pockets? An invisibility cloak?

[FireFox]

Umbris laughs at the last suggestion and disappears to prove the point.

[Lupy]

I know what you can't possibly have! He reaches into his pockets, and then "Ahas!" pulling out a tiny little warm golden orb. About a half inch across. He holds it out to Umbris.

[FireFox]

Umbris is still invisible. Then he appears in front of Lupy. Bit small for a heart... :smallwink::smallamused:

[Lupy]

Just because it's cliche! :smallannoyed: (:smalltongue:)

If you swallow it, you can become etheral at will. And you will also have a heartfire that will never go out.

[FireFox]

Wait, heartfire? I was being witty. What's a heartfire? :smallconfused:

Some may accuse me of taking noncanonical liberties with the Sheikahs' powers. However, they are the Shadow People, and considering what is all in the Shadow Temple, I do not consider it that farfetched that the Sheikah have illusionary powers. In any even, that Umbris disappears, and the invisible one next to Lupy tries to take whatever it is and hold it up.

[Lupy]

The reason mortals die one day is that their hearts are not made to last forever. Gods and the immortals, thus, do not have hearts, they have heartfires. They are extremely rare, and difficult to obtain, that is the only one I have aside from the one residing in me since my heart attack in fact, and I paid dearly for it. It will never go out once it is inside you, with it, you join the immortals. :smallsmile: This is, in otherwords, the best gift Lupy can give.

((All of this is in my canon, and does not apply to the town at large. Happy now Quinsar? :smalltongue: ))

[FireFox]

Umbris returns to normal and stares at it. You're offering me immortality?

the Irony is delicious... :smallbiggrin::smalleek::smallamused:

[Lupy]

Yes. I have nothing else worthy of you. ((And... Deadtime. Freeze 'til I get back Mister!))

[FireFox]

I'm going to bed in... actually, crap, I should probably go now... :smallsigh:

[Beholder1995]

Beholder crawls away from the deadtimed CKs and pulls out an old-fashioned camera and sets it up as Lupy and Umbris begin talking.

He takes multiple pictures of the whole conversation. :smalltongue:

There's a slight wind this morning in the jungle; the canopy rustles. Strange animal calls are heard from every direction.

[Nevitan]

Shaadup you stupid animals, some of us are trying to sleep!

[FireFox]

Umbris won't appear on the photographs... No soul...

[Beholder1995]

Oh, but it's an all-purpose, magical (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Asspull) camera.

I came prepared. :smalltongue:

[Nevitan]

Enough of your flashes Baron!

[Beholder1995]

Shaadup you stupid animals, some of us are trying to sleep!

They noises stop immediately, and are replaced by a soothing breeze.

[Nevitan]

Er... thank you for your promptness.

[FireFox]

:smalltongue: You were deadtimed when they started talking, and they stopped talking and deadtimed now. You can't take pictures of things that aren'y heppening currently, therefore, no pictures for you. Anddon't you dare say you've got a camera for that. :smalltongue:
In any event, with either Sheikah magic or simple physics and Time, Beholder will be unable to know anything of that conversation.

[Beholder1995]

Suddenly, off in the distance, a brass band strikes up, playing this. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNpkQhaXnC0&feature=related)

:smallbiggrin:

[Nevitan]

Joel deadtimed to ignore it
and is now back
have they stopped yet?

[Beholder1995]

Beholder is at the base of a tree, twitching. His eye is bloodshot.

This... is... the... three... hundred and forty... seventh... TIME!... *twitch*

[Nevitan]

Hm
Joel casts fly and goes toward the music.

[Beholder1995]

Beholder gets up and follows him. The music is coming from down the right path.

[Nevitan]

Of course it it.
Joel flies until he can see the band.

[Beholder1995]

They come to a clearing in the jungle; trees tower above a swath of well-cut green grass. The wooden bandstand is up against one 'wall', and seems to be made up entirely by goblinoids in band uniforms, with a hobgoblin conducting. They don't look in the least bit tired. Smaller, more rugged looking paths wind off into the jungle darkness in all directions out of the brief clearing. Dotted about are large stumps that are being used as seats and tables by a myriad of... creatures. At one, a purple worm and a rakshasa discuss the meaning of life. At another, a mummy and a mind flayer are having a drinking contest. At still another there's a gelatinous cube trying to explain relativity theory to a pair of Skeletons. You get the general idea.

Then there's the salad bar... it looks pretty regular. There's a hatless beholder there, fixing himself a plate. He immediately catches the Baron's eye.

[Nevitan]

Joel casts wall of force around the proceedings and then cloud kill inside.

[Beholder1995]

What the-?... Joel, don't do that! :smalleek: shouts Beholder as the cloudkill begins to appear. He uses telekinesis to try and make Joel fumble the spell.

[Nevitan]

There Too Loud!
He continues with the spell.

[Beholder1995]

The band stops abruptly. Somebody calls out "holy crap!".

...although most of the monsters don't seem to care.

The hobgoblin conductor, who has a fluffy white walrus moustache, looks desperately at Joel.

You stop that right now, son! :smalleek:

[Nevitan]

I bet I'm older than you!
and fun fact, cloud kill gas is flammable.

[Beholder1995]

A powerful-looking guy with a winged helmet and blue cloak causally casts a dispell spell on the cloudkill with a gauntleted hand.

The band is cowering in the last tier of the stand as the cloudkill approached.

Two of the monsters who were caught in the 'kill are dead on the ground.

[Nevitan]

:smallmad:oh yeah?
Joel casts Imprisonment on the Guy, a spell that should lock him 2000 feet below the earths surface in a orb, only a powerful divination followed by a Freedom spell will free him

[Beholder1995]

Due to his utter expendability, he is transported immediately. This garners a Joel few glares from the will-o'-the-wisps he was talking to, but nothing else.

The band cautiously gets back into position. The conductor calls out to Joel.

C-can we start playing again?... we can do something different, if you like that...

[Nevitan]

NO! your too classical, and you've been playing for too long.

[Beholder1995]

Well... I guess we could take a break...

he turns to the band.

Let's take ten, guys!

The goblinoids leave their instruments and go down to the salad bar. The instruments get up and begin chatting among themselves.

Beholder has found his way over to the other beholder.

[Nevitan]

Right through the force wall...

Joel casts Heal metal on there instruments .

[Beholder1995]

Ayup. Right through it. :smalltongue:

The instruments are heated up... but don't melt or freak out or anything. Plus, it's not like they're being loud...

I though Joel was Neutral Good... :smallconfused:

[Nevitan]

Hes Lawful Good, and these are monsters in an Unidentified land.
And I'm a little bored.
He keeps them heated until the band starts to pick up there instruments.

[Lupy]

Lupy floats up. Did I miss anything?

[Beholder1995]

Lupy floats up. Did I miss anything?

Not much. Joel just tried to kill a bunch of innocent monsters, though... :smallsigh:

YOU'RE ON!!! :smallbiggrin:

[Nevitan]

Monsters aren't innocent.
Band! you can play again!
the instruments are still heated

[Lupy]

Joel! No murdering!

[Beholder1995]

The band director looks up from his salad, food still in his mouth.

Buf werg nog donf yeg! :smallconfused::smallfrown:

Beholder looks at Joel.

Joel, please don't hurt them. :smallsigh:

[Nevitan]

Its not murdering if they're monsters.
Thats what makes them monsters.

[Beholder1995]

Its not murdering if they're monsters.
Thats what makes them monsters.

They're not doing any harm! :smallmad:

[Nevitan]

They Woke Me up!:smallmad:

[Beholder1995]

...and you claim to be neutral good. :smallannoyed:

Welcome to the dark side, Joel...

[Nevitan]

I never claimed to be neutral.. or Heavily wieghted towards Good
Joel animates the corpses of the fallen monsters.

[Lupy]

Both of you, murder is murder. I'm technically a monster you know. :smallmad:

[Beholder1995]

Well, put, Archbishop. :smalltongue:

The corpses spontaneously begin to dance an irish jig. The band rushes to their instruments to provide music. The rest of the creatures begin clapping to the beat.

[Nevitan]

You can't Godmod my Corpses.
Alright, But I'm still gonna mess with them
Joel was keeping the instruments heated

[Beholder1995]

The band members have spontaneously grown thick padded gloves. Er... they don't care?...

I'm just telling you what happens to the corpses as soon as they're animated...

[Lupy]

No. The heat should disappear when Lupy says it.

[Nevitan]

:smallannoyed:this trip was suppose to be fun

[Beholder1995]

Well, we could try one of the paths...

[Nevitan]

this is one of the paths, the one on the right, with a salad bar!

[Lupy]

A salad bar?!?! Lupy rushes off to find the dressing, bsalmic of course.

[Nevitan]

I thought you only ate food prepared by holy or blessed hands?

[Beholder1995]

this is one of the paths, the one on the right, with a salad bar!

Right, but there are others!

He motions to the various paths that wind out of the clearing into the jungle darkness.

I didn't know you were such a fanatic for salads, Archbishop... :smallconfused:

There is a beholder at the salad bar. Hatless, of course.

[Lupy]

No, I can only eat only unholy food every so often.

Never underestimate the powers of oil and vinegar Beholder.

Lupy fills a goblet with bsalmic, sets it on fire, and starts drinking it like most people drink a very fine wine.

[Nevitan]

Your food bores me
Joel flies way up. looking down for signs of life.

[Beholder1995]

The jungle stretches out as far as the eye can see. Towering brown mountains jut out from the surface sporadically. Off, way in the distance there seems to be the blue of an ocean.

The beholder at the bar bumps into Lupy, and says, with a very thick french accent:

Out of my way, you bumbling fellow in fancy clothes! :smallmad:

[Lupy]

Be careful as to whom you insult, petty one. :smallannoyed:

[Nevitan]

Ugh, frikkin Crap
Joel sarts using summon monster to bring in Fiendish land based monsters to watch them fall.

[Lupy]

If Lupy could see him Joel would be in so much trouble right now. Luckily for the necromancer though, he can't.

[Nevitan]

He might be able to see the creatures splatting in the ground though.

[Beholder1995]

I sneer at your silly hat, you son of a peanut-snorting salamander! :smallmad:

The creatures fall to the ground and crash, probably dying, into the trees. Far away from the clearing, I guess...

Deadtime. :smallsigh:

[Lupy]

Ima freeze Lupy til he's back, the chance for Lupy to argue with a frenchmen is just too hilarious.

[Nevitan]

Joel keeps summoning and splatting creatures

((I won't be on tonight.))

[Beholder1995]

Ima freeze Lupy til he's back, the chance for Lupy to argue with a frenchmen is just too hilarious.

No kidding. Do you know where I got the idea of this guy? :smallbiggrin::smalltongue:

Not undeadtiming, though...

[Nevitan]

Monty Python

[Lupy]

In that case...

Lupy flies up over the tree line...

What in the name of - JOEL! :smallmad:

[Nevitan]

Yes?
He summons a Fiendish Dire Tortoise and lets it drop.

[Lupy]

What in the hells are you doing!?! HE catches it on a forcefield.

[Nevitan]

Killing Evil monsters, how about you?

[Lupy]

You don't do it like this. :smallmad:

[Nevitan]

It seems to work, I pull them from the lower planes, the fall and splat:smallbiggrin:

[Lupy]

This like something they would do though. It isn't right. :smallmad:

[Nevitan]

Whats wrong With it?
It kills evil.

[Lupy]

In an evil way.

[Nevitan]

In a quick and easy way, whats wrong with killing Evil if It only hurts evil things?

[Lupy]

You can't just drop them from 100 feet up. It's wrong.

[Nevitan]

no its not. Nothin gbad happens to anyone good.

[Lupy]

Doing bad things to evil beings is still bad.

[Nevitan]

But then is killing bad?
and anyone who ever saved someone through murder is a terrible person?

[Lupy]

Reedemed for saving a life. Those are just getting sucked up from fighting the demons or devils though.

[Nevitan]

But another mage like Halaster could of used any of those monsters to hurt someone.

[Lupy]

True... Carry on, but I still don't like it. He flies back to the fruit bowl, his large wings carrying him down and then dissapearing once he lands.

[Nevitan]

I won an argument... with an Archbishop:smallconfused:


Joel flies back down
I'm out of those spells and plus, there are so many fiendish creatures killing 200 wouldn't make a difference much less 20.

[Lupy]

I lost an argument... With a wizard. :smallconfused:
Ah well, not like he made any difference.

[Nevitan]

Joel was talking to Lupy.

[Lupy]

Lupy was/is sort of zoned out.

[Nevitan]

Bwahaha.. wait you or the cleric?
So how about we kill some stuff?
Er... some evil stuff?

[Lupy]

I... Need some brandy... He goes off in search of some brandy, forgetting that he can make it.

[Nevitan]

huh...
Joel sits down at the benches in front of the stage

[Lupy]

Lupy is drinking brandy out of a bottle when he comes to and sets it down.

[Lupy]

Deadtime. See you man.

[Lupy]

Lupy undeadtimes.

[Beholder1995]

I sneer at your silly hat, you son of a peanut-snorting salamander! :smallmad:

Repost! Filler!

[Mee]

Luppppyyyy!!!!
Can you play someone in the inn? Please?

[FireFox]

Lupy undeadtimes.

Yo, whenever you get a chance, the H/H could be updated... :smallsmile:

[Lupy]

I laugh that you would insult the mitre of the great god Ignus. :smallamused:

[Beholder1995]

...

Your pathetic comeback is so foul that I must turn my nose up at it! You smell of the socks of a half-dead bigfoot, you unintelligent, half-baked coooooonnigit! :smallmad:

[Lupy]

As though I wish to speak with you, legless fop. Lupy walks back over to the brandy is his most dignified manner. And he learned to look dignified in the courts of the gods.

[Beholder1995]

Your feeble attempts at strutting about in your elegant manner does not intimidate at me! I spit at your sillyness! Your father was a hot dog, and your mother was the daughter of a bowling ball! :smallmad:

[Lupy]

Lupy is ignoring him and sipping his brandy. In a very refined manner.

[Beholder1995]

The beholder begins to chuck every manner of sh*t at Lupy, including, but not limited to, dead farm animals. :smalltongue:

[Lupy]

All of it bursts into flame, and turns to ash just before it hits him. He remains completely unaffected, not even looking over.

[Beholder1995]

Stupid demi-god types, with all their firey-disintegrateing nonsense...

Meh. :smallmad:

He gives up and goes over to a table to eat his salad. Beholder is at the bandstand, playing 1st trumpet in The Washington Post.

[Lupy]

Lupy nods to Beholder and wishes he could lay an instrument without magic.

[Beholder1995]

Beholder nods back. The song finishes. Beholder gets up, thanks the conductor warmly, then goes over to Lupy.

So, Archbishop... what do you think of this place?...

[Lupy]

A very nice party. Though I wonder who checked the guest list.

[Beholder1995]

Beholder looks at the assorted Monster Manual entries seated around the clearing.

Dunno. Maybe that guy.

He motions to a gibbering mouther trying to pick up a salad fork.