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Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-12, 07:41 PM
This thread is to post all hilarious, funny, chuckle atrracting inside jokes your gaming group has.

Here are a few of mine:

1) we (me, Vinshcwitz and Zaviousis) were in the "knarled forest" and apparently, there was a very important section of it. We walked into the clearing and saw a stone pedastal in the center. We all walked up to it as a bright light flashed. We all had to take a sense motive to see the creature that had appeared. Vinshiwtz and Zaveosis rolled an 18 and a 19. I, however, rolled a one on it. So, while they talked to the creature, I had my back to it, had my hands and fingers dancing infront of my face, and noticed I had fingers. And The DM even demenstrated it and said in a stupid voice"fiiiIIIIIIngers."

2) Zaviousis was added to the game later (before, he was a Vampire ranger). He was a paladin, and since we read oots, we immeadiately thought "Oh my god, we got a Miko." We all tried to talk him out of it, but couldn't. So, now every time a character makes a joke around him, he goes "I do not understand how..." or "I don't find that amusing." So, one day, (after we gave him the nick-name "fun-sucker") he did the same exact thing, but this time, I had the bright idea to make a slurping noise with my mouth. So, now every time we even mention a paladin, someone makes the slurping noise.

Lert, A.
2008-10-12, 07:55 PM
One word:

"Wumpires."

In a classic D&D setting my plot hook was an old man with a creepy Transylvanian accent who warned the group of wumpires. The group pretended to not understand and spent the next three sessions fighting vampires and wondering what is a wumpire and will it be worse than vampires.

The old man now shows up in every setting to warn of wumpires, whether they are real vampires or not.

Calinero
2008-10-12, 08:14 PM
I think I've got a few.

1. Dire Weasels. Apparently, at a session I did not attend, a few of them leaped out of a barrel and attacked a friend of mine. He killed them and tried to sell their bodies. It didn't work. Now, whenever we open or look in a barrel or chest, it is common for someone to yell "Dire weasels jump out at you!"

2. Mr. Snark. During one of our less serious sessions, a friend of mine made a cleric. Somehow he forgot to give him a name. Halfway through the session, we realized this and somehow named him "Mr. Snark." My friend began playing him as absurdly over the top in a ridiculous voice. He would also accentuate every other sentence by saying "Snark, snark snark" at the end. He also invented the Harlem Globetrotters.

3. Detect Taint! A result of a Ravenloft campaign where there existed Taint (an evil magical substance.) I was the only one who could use a spell to detect it, and got a little...overzealous. I began using it on random objects that couldn't possibly have Taint (including statues of the god Palor), just to annoy the DM. I know will occasionally bring it up in entirely unrelated campaigns.

Dr Bwaa
2008-10-12, 08:26 PM
We have a wizard from the first D&D campaign we ever played (still ongoing!) named Gamus The Badgermage (as a result of his using spare Summon Monsters to spawn loads of Badgers). He's one of only two original characters still alive (because he got ressurrected after his Disintegrate incident, unlike my crazy monk), and as we're nearly epic and clearly going to bebe epic soon enough, he's started spawning cross-campaigns. This is mostly the result of one session, in which we gained access to a newly-reopened leyline in order to Teleport (the Weave is all screwed up so teleportation from leylines is possible, but anything else is very, very dangerous) out into a desert oasis with a genie who might tell us where to find this dragon who has info on this other dragon...(etc etc etc it's a very well-done campaign). Anyway, before we left, all the magic-users were sort of in awe of the power of the leyline, and I natural 20'd a bardic knowledge check. Coupled with some inanely high Knowledge and Spellcraft rolls from various parties (Gamus, who is an archmage, has not failed a spellcraft roll in recorded history), we invented circle magic and got Gamus' effective caster level up to 53. Then he began spawning various nasty spells hundreds of feet high that shouldn't have been possible (we faked all the rules, none of this was RAW obviously) into the nearby town that we were about to be at war with, rescued the paladin's slain celestial gryphon (long story but now his mount just acquired the Ghostly template), and after we finally teleported, he collapsed on the ground and advanced an age category or two.

Since then Gamus the Badgermage has transcended time, space, and setting (and DM) to appear in almost every campaign since, usually playing the part of the strange old man giving out "sage" advice and resolving difficult plot points if needed.

drengnikrafe
2008-10-12, 08:31 PM
+1 Bard!

Okay, it goes like this. We get in a battle with a medium sized faction of Kua-Toa and other merfolk types. By medium sized I mean somewhere in the realm of 30-40ish. In any case, we are in this battle, and the Bard (who is a female gnome named Bob Dylan) starts playing a bard song that increases all attack rolls and damage rolls and AC by 1. Through this battle, which probably lasted 4-5 rounds, there were at least 6 sperate instances in which the line between the monster getting hit and not getting hit, or us getting hit or not getting hit, or the monster dying or not was decided by that 1 additional point. Not even joking. That Bard tipped the battle in our favor just enough for us to win it.

Return of Lanky
2008-10-12, 08:35 PM
To this day, one of my most memorable villains was a Lich Bard. On top of being a lot of fun, he was absurdly effective in futzing with the PCs.

This means that every time my PCs run into a Bard villain, they make preparations to deal with the undead. Any whiff of a Lich, and they prepare counterbardic measures.

And if the bastards ever stop, I'm going to nail them with another Lich Bard.

Pandaren
2008-10-12, 08:35 PM
A. Mr. squigy.


B: Jeb.


C: Wawoowawoo sound effect.

You're better off not asking.

Sstoopidtallkid
2008-10-12, 08:38 PM
"Do the Zombies have teeth?"

sonofzeal
2008-10-12, 08:44 PM
1) Flamestrike + room full of trolls = "FIRE IN THE TROLL!" Gets used as the verbal component for any AoE spell now, whether fire or not.

2) Passive Megaraptor + player yelling "Chaaaaarge" as a joke = startled Megaraptor and very very dead character. Gets used during any Mexican standoff now... strictly OOC of course.

3) Radical Pacifist Diplomancer + Harpoon Spider failing Will Save vs Calm Emotions = having a pleasant conversation with what was obviously intended to be pure "always Chaotic Evil (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AlwaysChaoticEvil)" cannon fodder. Gets used any time that character is within earshot, usually with references to tea and crumpets.

lordofthe_wog
2008-10-12, 09:03 PM
SLAAN!!!: After I played through Neverwinter Nights 2 with my best friend, we realized how awesome Slaan (some random lizardman) was. So we made a lizardfolk barbarian named Slaan, gave him a ranseur, and decided that his INT would be his dump instead of CHA and WIS. Teaming him up with a cleric who had managed to get a 17 for INT (against his 7) resulted in some rather disturbing inside jokes, including the edibility of dead frogs (as well as their existence in the middle of the desert), yakfolk tricking the two into thinking what they were eating was cow instead of human (a slip of the tongue gave it away), Slaan accidentally tricking the yakfolk guard into breaking down the door by holding his fingers centimeters away from his captors nose and chanting "I no touch you, I no touch you." Also, we now yell SLAAAAAAAAAN a lot. For no reason. At all.

Colossal Gay Al: In Slaan's second adventure, he and the cleric started out in the middle of a field, where dinosaurs roamed (because I'm an uncreative DM). He saw a T. Rex and an apatosaurus fighting, and decided to attack them both. Out of idiocy. Suddenly, the guy playing Slaan realized that there is only one possible reason I would put in a T. Rex. In the book Nymphology, there's a monster called Colossal Gay Al, a purple Tyrannosaurus of colossal size wearing a top hat and holding a cane, who's hobbies consist of tap dancing and devouring small towns.

The Orc Brothers: When I introduced another friend of mine to Dungeons and Dragons, we decided to make two half-orc brothers just to make it simple for him. I played the barbarian, because all I've ever been able to play is the guy who hits things with sticks. He, being an idiot, decides "HURR, MAYBEH I'LL PLAY DA CLERIC, DUH" and off we go. Now, not only does he make a cleric, but he uses a shortbow, while I go for beating the crap out of things with a greatclub. Well, against the DM's advice, we decide to take rather... unique character traits. My half-orc (Let's call him Fot) felt the incredible urge to mark his territory on everything he killed, which he did by relieving his bladder. My friend's half-orc (Togg) had to eat everything dead. So after everything in Room X was dead, Fot would unzip and let fly, then advance onto the next room, leaving Togg to chow down on the pee-soaked bodies.


Yes, we are horrible, horrible sickos.

Hal
2008-10-12, 09:11 PM
100% Fail: We have a ranger with multi-shot who has a tendancy to fire dozens of arrows and hit nothing but sky. We ended up making cards ranging from 100% Win to 100% Fail, and he would wear the cards on his face depending on how he did in the last round (and how consequential the fail is).

50 Bards: Has anyone seen the "Gamers" movies? In the second one, one of the players wants to play a bard, but his bard is incredibly fragile, so much so that it dies in every encounter. Midway through the campaign, the guy is tired of losing levels and asks if he can just bring in a new character anytime he dies. The DM hesitantly agrees, so the player brings in Bard clones anytime the previous one dies. At one point during a huge battle, the Bard dies so often that the rest of the party shields themselves behind a pile of Bard corpses.

My gaming group watched that movie together, so now whenever our DM threatens to make us fill out a new character sheet, we make jokes about our next character being 50 bards.

drengnikrafe
2008-10-12, 09:20 PM
100% Fail: We have a ranger with multi-shot who has a tendancy to fire dozens of arrows and hit nothing but sky. We ended up making cards ranging from 100% Win to 100% Fail, and he would wear the cards on his face depending on how he did in the last round (and how consequential the fail is).

50 Bards: Has anyone seen the "Gamers" movies? In the second one, one of the players wants to play a bard, but his bard is incredibly fragile, so much so that it dies in every encounter. Midway through the campaign, the guy is tired of losing levels and asks if he can just bring in a new character anytime he dies. The DM hesitantly agrees, so the player brings in Bard clones anytime the previous one dies. At one point during a huge battle, the Bard dies so often that the rest of the party shields themselves behind a pile of Bard corpses.

My gaming group watched that movie together, so now whenever our DM threatens to make us fill out a new character sheet, we make jokes about our next character being 50 bards.

The second Gamers movie (The Gamers: Dorkness Rising, I believe it was called) is actually finally out? No way!

herrhauptmann
2008-10-12, 09:29 PM
A recent 4E module I played, a bunch of elven followers of Mielikki were guarding a grove of trees when some wood smugglers showed up. Yes, wood smugglers (from Calimsham I think)
Well the smugglers beat the elven knights, and outran them heading into town at 2 am. In a town with curfew, they got the stolen wood back, evaded the pursuers, and got to their warehouse.
1 game day later, we crashed what 'might have been' warehouse, and what do we find? Entire freaking trees. Dozens of them, several feet wide each, and 20+ feet long. How the hell did they outfight and then outrun a bunch of knights? And why the hell were our bosses 'unsure as to the location of the warehouse'?

So now, whenever we take a job, we keep asking if we're being asked to retrieve 'rare wood'. The wood jokes got beat to hell in the last module, a weeks travel through the underdark to a shrine, and everything besides the walls are made from wood.

erikun
2008-10-12, 09:53 PM
"You found a soda machine."

Standard response when rolling a 1 on a Spot/Perception check, meaning that you were so far off track that you found something that wasn't even there. Frequently used even in non-modern settings. I kind of picked this up with one group and have taken it with me to others.

Skjaldbakka
2008-10-12, 10:06 PM
I had a villian dubbed "midboss". The fact that he was the main villain of the first half of the campaign just adds to the amusement factor. Not sure why you would dubb a Lich with 20th level spellcasting riding a colossal red dragon "midboss", but it happened.

Lycan 01
2008-10-12, 10:12 PM
"Its part of that fetish thing."

Call of Cthulhu's sanity system lists possible insanity effects. One of them is the developement of a fetish. My players read this, and now whenever somebody says something perverted, innuendo-laced, or even slightly suggestive in the middle of a game, one of my players will shrug and comment that its part of that fetish thing. Even in random conversations somebody might slip it in. It always makes us laugh, and it can turn a tense situation into an awkwardly funny one, especially if it leaves me (the Keeper) at a loss for words...


The twisted thing is that I intend to give one or more of my players a fetish in the next game. Perhaps they'll become obsessed with feet, or they'll find themselves inexplicably aroused by bullets... Man, I'm gonna make them wish they'd never made those jokes. :smallbiggrin:

Enlong
2008-10-12, 10:29 PM
CUUUUUBES!!

So I put my PCs through a big ol' maze, shich I then proceeded to fill with Gelatinous Cubes. Every time they turned a corner into a dead end, Cube. So now, one of my PCs has taken to screaming CUBES!! whenever confronted with one of them. He did this throughout the session. It was fun.

True, I haven't had a session with them since the first Cube incident, due to college and stuff, but I'm confident that one Cube sneaking up on that player is all it'll take to re-spark that joke.

Calinero
2008-10-12, 10:32 PM
.......

*twitches*

....cubes.....

Erm. Sorry. Ahem. Bad cube experience once. Near TPK. Was lucky to get out alive.

Actually that's another inside joke. I have long had the desire to make a Gelatinous Cube PC Cleric--a worshipper of Rubik. God of Cubes.

Enlong
2008-10-12, 10:35 PM
Wow... that would be awesome. And hey, is it my fault for putting cubes in the maze? Those things have evolved to fit perfectly into five-foot squares, man.

I never managed to get anybody with one. IMaybe I'll use Brine Oozes, stick one in an oasis...

... I like Oozes.

Neko Toast
2008-10-12, 10:43 PM
There was this table-top that a few of my friends and me played over the summer (McWoD, if you've heard of it. We only used the book for rules, though. Our DM completely re-invented the story). One of the first quests we had was finding this man named Otto. Well, at the end of the quest, the poor sap was shot at... with a tank. When the smoke cleared, the DM had us make spot checks. I was the only one who passed, so he told me that there were no signs of entrails or any body parts in the crater where Otto used to be. Well, I immediately assumed that Otto was still alive. So then in later quests, whenever a stranger had the same vague appearance as he did, I would shout out "Holy ****, it's Otto!" I did it so often that the DM eventually brought him back. xD Now I'm obligated to scream out "Otto!" during our sessions whenever we meet someone new.

Another one we had was about an NPC in the organization our characters were in. We never met him, but his name was mentioned several times. He was Slayer Harvey (all people in this society have a prefix: most of them being slayer). Well, since all of us had seen the show "Harvey Birdman: Attourney at Law" before, we made a pact to sing those words every time the name was mentioned. Well, it got awfully sickening after a while, so the DM finally killed him off.

nobodylovesyou4
2008-10-12, 10:54 PM
"Pork"
Once upon a time, our fair adventuring party entered a city (set in a homebrew campaign). The DM handed us the map so we could look the place over. One guy says, "pork, pork, pork... why did you write pork all over this map?" DM's response: "That's PARK!" Later, when getting a room in the inn, the same guy says, "Can't I just set up my tent in the pork? Or sleep on a porkbench?" Now, we no longer go to the park. We can only go to the pork.

"I'LL KILL YOU!"
We were playing a Return to Castle Ravenloft 3.5. I had just seen Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for the first time, so I wanted to use the line "we cant stop here, this is bat country!" somewhere in the game. However, I was beaten to it when my friend (same guy in the pork story, actually. he invents a lot of inside jokes.) slept outside (in the pork, actually... go figure!). During the night, he was swarmed by bats. First thing out of his mouth: "I can't sleep here, this is bat country!" I immedietly shouted, "That's my line! I'LL KILL YOU!" and proceeded to chase his ass around the table. Now whenever he makes a joke that I should've made, I shout that at him.

"Sugar"
This one is the most recent. I got the bright idea to make a barbarian who decided to name himself "Soogar". Due to illiteracy, however, he spells it "Sugar". So whenever pronounce it as "sugar", he yells, "IT SOOGAR!" That character was played by the same guy from the other two stories, and that joke went on for a while until he died. At one point, I actually went, "How's it going, soogar?" and he respond, "IT SUGAR! ER, SOOGAR! DAMNIT! LOOK WHAT YOU MAKE ME DO!"

The New Bruceski
2008-10-13, 01:31 AM
Dire Bears

In our 4e game we encountered some bears in a cave. As they attacked the DM accidentally read the listing for dire bears, and took my fighter from full to -15 in one set of attacks. To my credit as a defender I never even flinched, though I think it was shock. Now when he skips a column in the book or is double-checking something, we'll make cracks about "it's actually dire bear zombies" or a dire ooze, et cetera.

BloodyAngel
2008-10-13, 02:11 AM
"Rhem'vrock"

In a very odd game, I was running for two friends... one of whom was playing a drow cleric and the other, a half orc fighter. The drow, an arrogant thing, ordered the orc around like she owned him. In retaliation, he invented a term of address for said priestess. Rhem'vrock... according to him, is an orcish term that loosely translates to "wh*re-b*tch". It is apparently used to describe the many, many female orcs and the like that a powerful orcish warlord "owns". So... essentially an orcish concubine.

As the priestess did not speak a word of orcish, she had no idea what it was that he kept calling her. But he insisted it was a great term of respect! So, at one point, when she was forced to speak to a small band of orcs who were threatening her, she referred to HERSELF as a Rhem'vrock. Leading to a massive amount of laughter on their part. The irony is, it was enough to convince them that she was not dangerous, and saved the party's life.

Assorted references to Rhem'vrocks show up from time to time in my games now. I even have a female orc warrior named Rhem'vrock on my WoW account. :smallbiggrin:

Ravyn
2008-10-13, 02:21 AM
Most of mine are (at least originally) from Exalted games.

There was one that came up because of my group's tendency to recruit almost every NPC they saw. One of the players mentioned that he could imagine my BBEG getting up and moving up to the window in time to see them wander up. "It's the perfect day for the next step of my pla--good gods how many Solars did they BRING?!" That last line ended up showing up numerous times in that game, in the next game, in various other things--I even used it in my blog once.

And The Waffle Incident. Group's trying to break free of the BBEG's twin offspring, who've semi-captured them, and lead off with drugged breakfast. It lays one of the twins (and one of the PCs) low, but the other's still on his feet. Then the crafter who made the waffles chucks one at the remaining twin. With an accuracy-booster. Guy doesn't bother blocking. It should've done more damage, only my assistant (running the antagonist at the time) managed to convince me that a waffle should have negative damage. I really shouldn't've let him. But that's not the best part.

The best part was a year and a half later. There we are, in a D&D game run by a mutual friend of most of the group (not one of my players, but he'd played with us in another game), running into a room with the rather quirky "god" of the setting. One of the PCs attacks him and finds his weapon turned into a waffle. Attacks again, and now it's his helmet. After a bit of negotiation, someone asks him "Why waffles?" He responds, "Well, there was this guy a couple universes over who scored a hit with a soggy waffle..."

Then there were the jokes that came from when one of my players began his own game; I was responsible for quite a few of them.

We had one antagonist, one Seven Steel Viper by name. Big guy, bigger ego. And not too fond of being poked fun at. So I dealt with how slow combat was going by insulting him, particularly getting his name wrong. After getting several wrong numbers, materials and species (Five Paper Gartersnake!), I reached my turn and delivered my piece de resistance--"I know! We'll call you Half Dozen Pincushion!" my character shouts, as she hits him with two volleys of three chakram each. He kept the nickname for quite a while.

This was also a character who tended to take an inordinate amount of risks... not all of which succeeded. She spent more time surrendering than any character I've ever played--which satisfied her just fine, as it put her right where she could start talking her enemies around or sabotaging them on the way out. The joke got to be that the worst thing an enemy could possibly do was capture her.... but the enemies never quite figured that out.

LotharBot
2008-10-13, 10:40 AM
+1 Bard!

... Through this battle, which probably lasted 4-5 rounds, there were at least 6 sperate instances in which the line ... was decided by that 1 additional point.

I had a 4e cleric cast bless for the first and only time... made the difference on 8 attack rolls during a single fight. It wasn't even a very big fight. The group joked that I should quit while I'm ahead, and that the next 4 times I cast bless it'd be useless.

If anyone's played the Shackled City campaign, you might remember "Crazy Jared". Suffice it to say, "For Anduria!" has become a battle cry in our games, and we're often joking about having cardboard cutout armies at our backs.

We used to call one of my characters, a halfling ranger, the "masterwork halfling" because he was always giving people +2 bonuses for flanking, aid another, and so on. His legendary hate for goblins made him show up in goblin mythology in other campaigns -- Fear effects tended to make goblins scream "oh no, it's THE GARLEN!" Eventually the world backstory came to include him being summoned from another world to lead an assault on a goblin lesser deity.

Another player made a character named "filthy Ike", a brilliant archer who never bathed. When one of the host's dogs let one rip, it always got blamed on Ike.

Also from the Shackled City campaign and our continued epilogue... our broken batman wizard, Roland, had gained control of the plane of Occipitus. One of our epic plots was to move Occipitus (which was the size of a small moon) from being embedded in an evil-aligned plane to a good-aligned plane. So we flew it there, over and through other planes. Someone joked that Roland should carve a huge stone fist on one end of it, and create an epic spell of "Fist of Occipitus" that summoned it to smack down an enemy.

In our next campaign, one of the end bosses (a CR 22 dry lich at the time) flew past our level 7 party and dropped a spell on our Giant Paladin ally. The DM thought that would be it -- she whacks our big ally and flies off, and we finish fighting with the goblins on the ground. Well, we weren't going to stand for that, so the aforementioned Filthy Ike (buffed up from our bard) lets go with a volley of arrows, and takes out her canosphinx mount. "I can't believe you killed her dog" is now our catch phrase for when someone takes on a challenge way too big for them.

Whenever that party, which topped out at level 17, ran into a fight where big melee would be the right solution, someone would say "we need a spell of summon Rubble Rousers" (the level 27 Shackled City party, which was heavily melee focused). So, over 6 months of careful planning, my wife and I conspired to make it happen. I know it sounds like a bad idea to mix a level 17 party and a level 27 party, but all of our players loved it, and everyone had a significant role in the boss fights. So that's a case of an inside joke turning into an actual gameplay experience.

AgentPaper
2008-10-13, 12:40 PM
Very early on, when my group was just starting DnD, one of my players made a character named "Blargo". He was a typical very stupid fighter, notably one-sixteenth tree. (He spoke the language, too) In the first part of the adventure, another character, a gnome wizard, finds Blargo, who had wandered off at some point. Blargo instantly assumes that the gnome is a spy, and rolls a 1 on his sense motive when the gnome tries to reason with him. So, Blargo attacks, sending the gnome flying off into a bottomless pit of sorts. When Blargo finally rejoined the party, his only words were, "I killed a spy! Wheres the shorty man?" Now, whenever another PC meets up with another after some time, one of them will shout out, "A SPY!" and roll a sense motive. Fortunately this hasn't resulted in a PK yet.

Later on in the campaign, the same party was stuck defending a small keep from a horde of orcs. Unfortunately, the player who usually played Blargo couldn't make it, so he was controlled by another character, who had a dwarf fighter that he played. Now, the dwarf fighter had recently broken 20 on his AC, and he now thought himself pretty-near invincible, especially to a bunch of measly orcs. So, he makes himself and Blargo rush out a breach in the wall (made by a catapult) to hold the orcs there. One round later, both get attacked by ALL of the 20 or so orcs outside (mostly javelins) and die. Now, whenever a PC or NPC dies, everyone wails, "Blargo! WHY!" and throws that player dirty looks.

Blackfang108
2008-10-13, 01:14 PM
"Hey 'John,' search for traps."

He was the rogue.

Three traps were successfully detected. 7 were not.

10 traps went off in his face.

Over the matter of an evening (realtime).

We call it the "Night of the Living Fumbles."

And regarding the +1 Bard:

My Warlord recently used Lead the Attack. I missed, AGAIN.

and the +1 to attacks for everyone else from the miss made the difference between the thing getting another attack in or not.

And I hat to keep reminding them. Three people in a row: "24 v AC/ Miss/ Did you remember the +1?/ Oh, 25/ Hit."

shaddy_24
2008-10-13, 01:35 PM
There was when I was DMing Expedition to Castle Ravenloft. The players encounter a vampire (who was successfully ID'd as a vampire) and the ranger asks if he should shoot arrows at the guy. I respond "Well, you could shoot chickens at him, but they wouldn't deal that much damage." Now whenever someone asks what they should shoot at an opponant, the first answer is "chickens!"

Smeggedoff
2008-10-13, 01:39 PM
P'tang P'tang, god of newts, mentioned every time we need a minor god to be standing around :)

in his pantheon is

Gond, Gnome god of invention, junk and making a quick buck (can't remember how different this is to his faerunian counterpart), turns up everytime we need something odd

usually in his travelling junk shop, where can be found

Talking moose head, trophy, always introduced with a cry of "BUY THE TALKING MOOSE HEAD!" heavily referenced anytime we go shopping

also usually affiliated with Gond is

The Wand of Random Polymorph, a horrible, HORRIBLE artefact we were once gifted with that when touched to something, polymorphs it randomly with no HD limit for a short amount of time, during experimentation our wizard goes down to a beach, picks up a handful of sand and...
cue the rest of the party standing on a cliff overlooking the beach, wizard tears past screaming being pursued by an assorted pack of monsters, including but not limited to three tarresque...and a rock

not just any rock

the Rock that goes "HaghlaghlaghlaghlaGL" (For WoW players think Murloc) the announcement of the rock must be accompanied by the appropriate finger motions (hands at nose level, fingers down like wiggling tentacles), the cry and accompanying finger motions would surely be heard and seen whenever someone looks in a barrel, chest or fails a search roll.


thank you and goodnight, you've been a wonderful audience

Thrawn183
2008-10-13, 01:43 PM
"2d6+6"
In a game early this summer, my DM's girlfriend's ex came to visit. Nobody likes him. Let me put it this way, somewhere between talking about how he got hired to strip and talking about working in a hospital and seeing a gangrenous... female... yeah, he pulls out his wallet and shows how he keeps a card that his frat hands out with the Georgia pedophilia laws on it "just in case." The fact that he goes to school in Alabama means he must have a lot of these things.

Anyway, he brought a monk that he plays, that happened to have some pretty great stats. Really great stats, but he was playing a monk. He did a whole 2d6+6 per unarmed strike. At level 13. We fought some lycanthropes with DR 10/silver. He started the night boasting about how amazing his character was and ended the night literally cursing how horrible it was. Anyway, now my friends and I will hit eachother in the arm and say "2d6+6!" Its funner because an unarmed strike can be any body party, so you can just walk up to a friend, headbut him and say 2d6+6! It's spread to a whole lot of my friends who weren't even there.

KazilDarkeye
2008-10-13, 01:44 PM
In my case I have recurring characters:

1. Sir. Eeriously;
A centaur with a brother named Dave. Usually high on pot (the rest of the time he's sleeping). That's not actually his name, but he says "seriously" a lot and our party Monk was a bit literal-minded.


2. Handwash Only;
A Yuan-Ti Pureblood with retrograde amnesia (short-term memory loss). Writes things he has to remember on his arms e.t.c. Knows his name because that's what it says on the label on the inside of his trousers. Has a second cousin called Machine Washable (who is a lot more "together", apart from the fact he keeps forgetting his name). I hope to surprise the players with 80% Polyester Blend soonish.

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 05:13 PM
O you mean the Vinshwitz thats and elf bard that MULTI CLASSED INTO ROGUE AND RANGER AND IS CHAOCTIC NUETRAL and nobody likes him cuz he is awesome and he hit a 49 on a goblin with 6 hippoints and made its atoms disappeare from all exisatanceS????????? i think i have heard of him.:smallbiggrin:

Storm Bringer
2008-10-13, 05:46 PM
gnome on a stick: confectionary of choice for the kobald on the go.
Came about due to our first 3rd ed campgain, where the party thief (a ugly gnome rogue. Like chr 4) was always out in front out the party, scouting like a good theif should. However, we were still getting the hang of the rules, and he had a frankly crap hide roll. he was forever being spotted, and the kobalds first reaction to an intruder was to chuck a javalin at him, Now, his AC was crap as well, so he was forever being hit. the result: a gnome on a stick.

the best part is later on, he pumped his hide/move silently up to stupid levels. he once snuck down a 3 foot wide hole that a beholder was looking down, then took it out in one really, really lucky backstab. he was preening for hours after that one.


Dogs: Doesn't matter where we meet them, members of the canine genus are our most deadly foes, being responsible for many a dead PC. We've had a party breeze though a enitre cult to be taken out by the leaders pet spaniel.


other in-jokes: all incidental coversations between NPCs are always about Chelsea's cup chances. you'd be suprised how many orcs support The Blues. It's almost as many as support Man U.

Jalor
2008-10-13, 05:50 PM
My group has two.

1) The first one is from a comedy sketch called Number Wang (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGkQB0f1hks). Every time anyone mentions a number and someone remembers that sketch, they call out "That's numberwang!".

2) During an early session in which one player was being stupid, our DM threatened to have a "fairy riding a beholder, using its eyestalks as reins, whose breath weapon is 1d4 mindflayers" attack him. It's now the equivalent of a "rocks fall" in our games.

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 06:10 PM
I had no idea this thread would get to two pages already. Yay for me.

And no vinchwitz, (how do you SPELL that?!?!?!?!?) I was talking about the one who I had to grab a SAVE from falling into lava by rolling horribly on a balance check. I did this TWICE!!!!!!! That vinchwitz.

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 06:13 PM
I had no idea this thread would get to two pages already. Yay for me.

And no vinchwitz, (how do you SPELL that?!?!?!?!?) I was talking about the one who I had to grab a SAVE from falling into lava by rolling horribly on a balance check. I did this TWICE!!!!!!! That vinchwitz.
try to pronouciate vinchwitz, then try vinshwitz, whci hsounds more elven

what falling a dex check and nearly \falling in lava til a person called Xavion saves me???

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 06:16 PM
They sound the same...

You know, when we all went on the stepping stones and had to roll the dice. Me and Zavieousis gopt AWESOME and WIN while you got a FAIL... TWICE!!!!!!!!!!!
And I was awesome enough to save your skin instead of shrugging my shoulders and saying "Ah well, another PK"

Asheram
2008-10-13, 06:38 PM
Oh gods. Were to start.

We have this guy in our party... This is an interesting fellow. IRL, he's got either high Wis, Low Int. Or high Int, Low Wis. He's a real marvel to play with.

We've just rescued this young girl, 'bout 19 years of age, from a lot of hobgoblins. Now. The guy thinks a little, looks at his character sheet, then asks the dm
"About how much does the girl weigh"?
DM responds: "Eh? Oh.. About 120 lbs."
He replies. "Great! Then she fits right into my bag!"

Annother occurance... We've split up the party on a late night session of gaming. Everyone is really tired. (I apparently passed out after ninjaing the kill of a troll from the said guy above.) Now. It's common occurance to put your character on autopilot after someone else if you go to the bathroom or something like that in order to keep the game running. Now, Idiot said above plays a dwarf warrior and is out in a forest with a monk following close behind. The monk passes out (irl) from fatigue and is now on autopilot after the dwarf.
About two hours later, the monk awakens, looks around, and finds that's he's captured by an orc warlord who wonders what the Hell the guy were doing in his lands, while noticing that the dwarf is now re-rolling his character.

Also, it's a common occurance that whenever you roll a 1 on a spotcheck, that you see either pink elefants, or a lot of hidden indians around the room.
When you roll a 1 on a listen, you instead hear something that sounds like elephants.

Oh yes... Of course, the great blunder of holding a quite heated discussion on if we should kill the kobolds or not, in presence of the kobold chieftan, in common, believing that they only could speak draconic...

And of course, the classic of the warrior in fullplate attempting to sneak past the dragon.

Beholder1995
2008-10-13, 06:42 PM
This is an inside joke between two of my players that I simply don't understand.

I DM for two experienced players who have got... a LOT of inside jokes between them... anyway, one time during a session, somehow, the name 'Schindler's List' came up. And they both. Cracked. Up.

To this day, I can't imagine why the mention of that movie would make them guffaw like that...

Icewalker
2008-10-13, 06:48 PM
Had a member of the group who was ridiculous in the extent of rules lawyering, although not so much in a bad as much as just he was willing to argue any point towards his advantage, as it was first edition so the rules are very fuzzy in places. It was really just kind of entertaining, but the phrase which is now used whenever rules-lawyering arises is "Define door."

Revanmal
2008-10-13, 07:01 PM
Rolling a 1:

Search - "You found a magic oven mitt." *searcher now has to wear said oven mitt the rest of the game irl*

Spot - "Ooh a penny!"

Listen - "A song of unparalleled beauty wafts into your eardrums, distracting you from any other outside noise..." *DM pulls out a tape deck and plays 'Baby Got Back'*

Townopolis
2008-10-13, 07:18 PM
We once had a gnoll in our party, he had the lowest INT in the party, but we ended up using his plans whenever he was around.

That's not the joke though,

We were setting up an ambush for a chain demon. Most of the party (my paladin, a ranger, and two clerics) hide in a ruined tower while the gnoll and another paladin lure the demon in. After they jump in and "hide from the demon in the tower" the gnoll decides to shout out some encouragement to the demon. Something along the lines of the following is shouted out.

"Oh no! We're trapped in this tower, unable to escape, defenseless, and most importantly, ALL ALONE!"

Gnoll rolls nat. 20, demon rolls nat. 1.

Now, whenever anyone's bluffing anything "And most importantly, we're ALL ALONE!" is shouted out by someone else.

KillianHawkeye
2008-10-13, 07:26 PM
'5-foot Step'

In our ongoing 3.5 campaign, one of the players is playing a Fighter who is tricked out for archery. He can shoot at any target he can see without penalty, since we rarely have enemies farther enough away to be in his 2nd range increment.

Anyway, he frequently attacks using Rapid Shot for 3 attacks (he's currently level 10), followed by making a 5-foot step in some direction that only makes sense to him and rarely actually accomplishes anything useful. He does this EVERY SINGLE ROUND of combat! Even if it's just going back and forth from one square to another.

So anytime that player can't make it, somebody else usually takes control of him for fights, and we always remember to have him take his 5-foot step every round. :smallwink:

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 07:45 PM
They sound the same...

You know, when we all went on the stepping stones and had to roll the dice. Me and Zavieousis gopt AWESOME and WIN while you got a FAIL... TWICE!!!!!!!!!!!
And I was awesome enough to save your skin instead of shrugging my shoulders and saying "Ah well, another PK"
they dont saound the same, what u are saying should be pronouce "vintwitch"
*ch* *ch* *ch* and yes you did becouze the dice hate me. :smalleek:

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 07:47 PM
darn right i hate you
Did I say that?

Decoy69
2008-10-13, 07:48 PM
We have our very own "Jimmy the Shiv" an old deranged prisoner who seems to appear in every prison. Regardless of what has happenend to him previously. He's always in the corner with a polite "Shiv ye while ye sleep?" making furious stabbing motions.

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 07:50 PM
lol. I used to call someone shiv, but i never knew what it meant. Oh well...:smallbiggrin:

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 07:58 PM
my brains leak from my ears and cotten balls eat fingers.

Mushroom Ninja
2008-10-13, 08:17 PM
My group has several:

I look at the Ceiling, do I see a Vampire?
Legendarily, my group at one time, had a DM who loved to surprise PCs by having Vampires drop down on them from the ceiling (they climbed there with their spider climb ability). One day the PCs entered a room and,before the DM could read the description, one of them declared "I look at the ceiling, do I see a vampire?" The DM, befuddled by this, dived behind his screen to check his notes and, emerging with an evil grin on his face, stated "Yes, in fact, you do!"

Boots of Elvenkind
In my group, none of the players who have been with the group for quite a while ever buy Boots of Elvenkind. I asked some of the players who had been around the longest and they told me the following story:
Apparently in one campaign, some character bought a pair of Boots of Elvenkind and died that session. Another character in the party decided that the boots would serve him better than his friend's dead corpse and took them for himself. The next session, he died. After three or four characters died completly nonrelated deaths the session after they inherited the boots, the party, deciding that they must be cursed, sunk the boots to the bottom of the sea.
Now whenever some new player joins the group and has Boots of Elvenkind on his character sheet, everyone eyeballs him suspiciously.

Sneak Attacks
It's an ongoing joke in my group that certain DMs, whenever they see that a player is playing a rogue, change all enemies in the adventure into plants, oozes, elementals, constructs, and undead.

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 08:22 PM
nice sig. mushroom

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 08:25 PM
My group has several:

I look at the Ceiling, do I see a Vampire?
Legendarily, my group at one time, had a DM who loved to surprise PCs by having Vampires drop down on them from the ceiling (they climbed there with their spider climb ability). One day the PCs entered a room and,before the DM could read the description, one of them declared "I look at the ceiling, do I see a vampire?" The DM, befuddled by this, dived behind his screen to check his notes and, emerging with an evil grin on his face, stated "Yes, in fact, you do!"

Boots of Elvenkind
In my group, none of the players who have been with the group for quite a while ever buy Boots of Elvenkind. I asked some of the players who had been around the longest and they told me the following story:
Apparently in one campaign, some character bought a pair of Boots of Elvenkind and died that session. Another character in the party decided that the boots would serve him better than his friend's dead corpse and took them for himself. The next session, he died. After three or four characters died completly nonrelated deaths the session after they inherited the boots, the party, deciding that they must be cursed, sunk the boots to the bottom of the sea.
Now whenever some new player joins the group and has Boots of Elvenkind on his character sheet, everyone eyeballs him suspiciously.

Sneak Attacks
It's an ongoing joke in my group that certain DMs, whenever they see that a player is playing a rogue, change all enemies in the adventure into plants, oozes, elementals, constructs, and undead.

The sneak attack one would be REALLY bad for my rogue, Pavion.

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 08:26 PM
The sneak attack one would be REALLY bad for my rogue, Pavion.
Thought is name a Javard?

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-13, 08:27 PM
Oh opps, my bad. It is Gerard.

Vinshwitz
2008-10-13, 08:33 PM
o ok i see now

Jorgo Mono
2008-10-13, 09:12 PM
Two Words:


"Ride Check" :smallamused:


Funny amoung my group of immature people for reasons that would not be appropriate to list on this forum.

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-14, 05:18 AM
:smalleek:

only1doug
2008-10-14, 06:02 AM
"metaaal" with accompanying hand wiggle.

during a very odd campaign we were on Mongo, the party are wandering between the various areas of Mongo and had found a small village.
No one spoke the language of the occupants except me (i was the shaman of another nearby tribe) and i could only speak to one of the rest of the party.
For some reason Player A had an obsession with finding sources of metal, every 5 minutes he'd ask about it. At one point he asked about fish, with hand wiggling gesture to indicate fish, My character assumed this was another way of asking about this metal that he was always asking about and said metal (hand wiggling to indicate fish).

Now in any game when someone becomes obssessive about one subjuct or has become misunderstood someone will wiggle their hand ans say "metaaal"

My character learned some other english phrases but metal is the most remembered.


"what you think" hand movement second finger raised, rest of fist clenched

"whatever" Hand raised palm out to speaker, head turned away.

"something else" hand flat wriggling to indicate snake.

"flick the lid, spin the wheel" the verbal component of a fire summoning spell that they had taught me. requires somatic component (as described) and focus (fuelled zippo lighter) to work.
creates a small but useable flame.

Guinea Anubis
2008-10-14, 06:23 AM
Its not a bug he can take it
DMing Deadlands Reloaded for my friends. The posse got hired to take care of a Hummbug infestation. Now Hummbugs are kinda like Cicadas from hell, they can keep a 5 mile area awake with there humming and shater any glass with in 10 feet. Hummbugs also can do a small AOE sonic attack when in danger.

Now the one guy is playing a character that is an alcoholic. When trying to pin point where the bug was, he got with in 10 feet, Well needless to say the bottle of Alc he had on him shaters. This pisses him off since he just picked it up and it was a bottle of the good stuff. So he goes for over kill and puts a stick of TNT in the tree the has the bug in it, but somehow the Hummbug lived.

So he makes up his mind just to step on the stupid bug... and misses. Well at this point the Hummbug is doing its AOE sonic attack and he starts to bleed from the ears.

So he pulls out his saber to stabe the bug.... and misses. He now takes a wound from the Hummbugs sonic attack.

Getting REALLY pissed off he pulls out his double barrel shotgun and unloads both barrels at the bug... hits the hummbug! But rolls low on damage. I use one of the DMs fate chips to make a soke roll, and soke up all the damge so the Hummbug lives with no damage. He is still bleeding from the ears but makes the save so he does not take another wound.

Well this was the last straw for him so he backs off and pulls out another stick of TNT lights it and tosses it at the Hummbug...and misses! So he uses one of his fate chips to re-roll ... and misses again! So he uses anouther fate chip to re-roll ... and hits... rolls damage... and after a long battle the Cicada sized Hummbug dies.

Blah

So we where walking down a road and heard something in the bushes. We where going to just walk past it but the one player asked "what does it sound like" the DM said "Blah (the sounds Wishbone makes spitting something out)" after hearing the Blah 2 or 3 times the player said "OK, I have to see what it is" So now Blah is the sound of temptation.

Orran
2008-10-14, 06:52 AM
As a DM I have the unfortunate habit of saying what my characters are fighting as I say their action. It goes a little like this.

Player 1: Well I'm not sure if this guy is evil so lets try and take him with no-lethal force *hits my vampire for 18 NL damage*
Me: Ok well the vampire doesn't sdeem fased by this
Player 1: ...
Player 2: So he's a vampire then?
Me: Ah crap

This has happened with vampires, werewolves, a cleric they thought was a death knight and most recently a bard. So now whenever my players don't know what something is they make jokes about me saying it until I inevitably do.

Another one is that for a while the party crab like creatures on two different occasions, and I accidently said wall-like instead of war-like. So know whenever they see crabs they say "Ahh wall-crabs" and joke that the crabs are saying "Ahh wall-people."

Leon
2008-10-14, 09:13 AM
In WHFRP

"Do we get out numbering" - even when we are plainly outnumbered, and sometimes we use it too much that it bites us, but it is a valid tactic for some members of the group to have a chance in combat

"Does it have Loot" - the catch cry of the Kislevite

"You didn't kill anything but didn't get hurt" - often what i hear when im late to a session or missed a session, its also become common when im at a session as i can fail to hit a barn door even with massive bonuses but conversely a T5 Fullplate wearing Dwarf doesn't take much damage

" its a Rat" (or many variations of) - My Dwarf suffered at the hands of the skaven and now suffers a insanity in regard to anything related to rats, has resulted in quite a number of incidents involving mundane rats and misunderstanding's


DarkSun

"No Bugs" - Giant Ants are a no go for my Druid, ive been on the losing end a number of times and various other large vermin have ravaged the party on occasion

only1doug
2008-10-14, 09:33 AM
In WHFRP

<snip>
"You didn't kill anything but didn't get hurt" - often what i hear when im late to a session or missed a session, its also become common when im at a session as i can fail to hit a barn door even with massive bonuses but conversely a T5 Fullplate wearing Dwarf doesn't take much damage


T5? wimpy for a Dorf, my group has T6 or T7 dorfs.

I assume you are playing the original WFRP not the new edition.

Leon
2008-10-14, 09:51 AM
New, currently T5 - it will go up later, regrettably an encounter with a spawn of nurgle has stunted the actual stat somewhat.
Also the Dwarf is SPD 5 (6 if fleeing)

Angel in Black
2008-10-14, 10:07 AM
In a low-power (15 point buy, commoner stat equivalent) game, a buddy of mine decided to play a monk. This was a mistake. A monk with a +1 LA. Bigger mistake. A water mephling, so small-sized. Silly, silly Mike...
He missed so often... "FoM it, Mike!"
When he did hit, he would ALWAYS do... "how much damage, Mike?" "2!!" with accompanying two-finger wave with a sarcastically excited look on his face.
Also, since he had like 6 HP, every time he got healed up from negatives in a fight... "so, Mike, you wanna get up?" "No, no that's alright. I'm-a stay right here, where it's safe."

Then there was the thing when I was running the Witchfire Trilogy (Iron Kingdoms), and they took issue with Magistrate Borloch's name.
"What the hell kind of name is Borloch, anyway?"
"I dunno... Maybe it's elvish for something?"
"Don't be stupid, he's human!"
"That don't mean nuthin."
"OK, if you're so clever, what's it mean?"
"Two."
From then on, every time the number 2 would come up, they'd say "Borloch" instead. made the betrayal a whole lot more satisfying for me, I can tell you!

Good times.

Xavion&Pavion
2008-10-14, 07:14 PM
During one session, we were in a dungeon, and there was a tresure chest in the middle of the room. Me being the tank/cleric, I had to open this chest since we had already fallen into several trap chests. So, i wlaked over to it, and opened it up. Inside, was a small red crab, and a moth ball. I reached in, and without getting pinched by the crab, picked up the mothball. I looked at it, and then set it back in. As I reached my fingers in that held the mothball, the crab grabbed it, put it on his head thingy or above his face, and danced from side to side, with his pincers pinching high in the air.
So now, that group of our PCs are called "The Order of the Crab" and our symbol is a crab, with a mothball on his head.

SurlySeraph
2008-10-14, 07:51 PM
1. "I eat the baby!"
So there was this baby. It was demonically possessed. If we just killed it without sealing the demon somehow, it would just possess a different baby elsewhere in town. We didn't have any spells to banish the demon. So, instead of doing the smart thing and finding the appropriate spells, we took the fast approach. My paladin heroically ate the baby, imprisoning the demon in his own stomach. The DM was too shocked to make any objections, such as that the baby would die before I finished eating it, or that no normal human could swallow a baby whole, or that the demon would find a way out of my stomach, or that even if I'm a Gray Guard and it's for the greater good, eating a baby damn well violates the paladin's code.
2. "I go to the brothel!" "There are no brothels in this town." "I start one!"
I think this is self-explanatory.
3. "There's no such thing as Chaotic Good."
I tend to play unimaginative, paranoid, puritanical paladins. Whenever there's a Chaotic Good member of a usually evil race (either as a PC or NPC), I either steadfastly deny that he can be good and put lots of effort into spying on him to make sure he isn't trying to betray us, and frequently attempt to exorcise him. If such a character does something very and undeniably good the first time I see him, I start denying that he exists, convinced that he's just an illusion created by a conspiracy to make me more tolerant and sinful.

TheEmerged
2008-10-14, 08:04 PM
You guys know that one video where the guy casts Magic Missile into the darkness? I had a player in a Champions campaign that built his character around this concept -- and it *worked*.

"I am SO screwed this turn..." Yes, we're a group of optimists. This comes from a board game we're fond of called Robo Rally. At the time we usually played at a married friend's house, and his wife was fond of commenting that we said this so often while playing she was beginning to think it was part of the rules. Naturally it has bleed into other games.

"I wait for the orcs to respawn to see if we get better loot next time." A lot of the people that were part of the D&D 3.0 campaign I've mentioned before were actually first-time players to the pencil & paper RPG experience, coming from EverQuest. Needless to say this led to constant MMOG jokes, even though most of the time they were sarcastic (like this one).

"Annoying Man!" Most of my time in pencil & paper RPG gaming has been in the HERO system, especially the superheroic genre. One time, the players challenged me to create a single character with 'normal' defenses/stun/body and no more than a 2d6 NND but unlimited number of points to see how long I could keep the character alive. It ended up being one of the few times I've seen a HERO fight back up more than a "minute" (which in HERO is closer to 30 turns in most games). The sarcastically-named 'Annoying Man' had so many tricks up his sleeve the players were ready to kill me. As a result, to this day I start getting glares whenever the opposition starts 'avoiding death'...

Lord Tataraus
2008-10-14, 09:33 PM
I just started up a Hunter: The Vigil game with my new group at my college and already we have one inside joke from the first session. One player decided to play a Coroner and he was trying to think of what virtue/vice to have when some one suggested Lust for his vice. The inevitable follow up was the suggestion that his character is a necrophiliac and his first brush with the supernatural was in mid...uh...climax with a cadaver who turned out to be a vampire and proved to be an especially awkward situation. From then on the player can never live that down. His necrophilia is constantly referenced (most ooc) to the point that he has accepted it and its sort of a creepy unknown where the other characters wonder if he really is a necrophiliac or not.

Knaight
2008-10-15, 09:06 AM
The Black Hand.
In a Fudge game, one of the characters, a monk with black market connections, was trying to remember any mercenary bands nearby, and rolled horribly. So he remembers The Black Hand, simply because they are so generic, and goes to the city to check it out. It turns out that they are all peace loving people who smoke a black herb that stains skin dark grey when harvested, so for a few minutes the monk(who can only speak in proverbs) is talking to the incredibly high black hand member they run across. The conversation went something like this:
M: "When the minnow seeks the octopus he must remember that the octupus can change his spots"
BHG(black hand guy): Suup man. I saw an octopus change his spots once it was raad. (smokes). You want some.
FM(fire mage, another party member). Yes.(smokes, becomes a peaceful hippy).
BHG: You gunna pay for that maan?
M: The clownfish does not thank the octopus for his ink.
FM: Maaybe
BHG: Seriously man?
FM: No
BHG: Thaats coool.

All of this was done in extremely cheesy accents. Later the fire mage blew smoke in a guards face, causing the guard to suddenly realize his job was too violent. So all it takes for hilarity to insue is for a cheesy accent and fake smoking sign to be used somewhere, or for someone to fake smoke in somebodies face and them to say that their life was too violent.

Your not a guard.
In another Fudge game, this one a sci-fi black ops game, the party had earlier bribed some of the better higher paid guards to give them their uniforms, for a huge amount of money. Later one of the party, a woman in a mans uniform was walking past a bunch of drunk guards. So one of the guards pointed, and slurred "Yoour not a guuard." Then he staggered, and pointed at one of the other guards, who then said "Yess I aam" and pulled a gun. Three drunk guards proceeded to shoot at eachother, missing for a while, while the party member walked past. However it was caught on camera, so competent guards were later sent at the party. Just saying "your not a guard" and pointing sideways is now hilarious to everybody who was there.

Yes, I was the GM and do think that drugs and alcohol can make for really good humor in games. Sue me.

TheCountAlucard
2008-10-15, 01:52 PM
A few sessions ago, the party saw a bunch of clay statues by the riverside. The Mystic Theurge decides that they're probably golems of some sort, and has the fighter start messing with them. Since nothing really happens, the party moves on. Later on, they encounter an intelligent clay golem. The golem couldn't speak, but it seemed friendly enough, so they allowed it to follow them around. Turns out that the golem is the one who made the statues, trying to make "friends."

The party fighter has grown somewhat attached to it. He was rather disappointed when it disappeared while the party was travelling through some woods.

The PCs later got a chance at a wish from a glabrezu. The party really needed to beat someone to a powerful artifact, so they decided to have the glabrezu transport them there via the wish. At the last second, the fighter said, "...and the golem, too."

So, the party appears in the location they wished to be transported to, and the fighter sees the golem wearing a tribal outfit, including a large crown woven out of grass, and holding a staff with a human skull on top.

The party supposes that the golem had started a cult somewhere, and we all had a good laugh.

WalkingTarget
2008-10-15, 02:48 PM
Hmm...

Ok, 1st ed. L5R: the GM had us running all over the Rokugan on a mission from the Emperor. This involved a lot of border crossing and the bureaucracy involved in that. Eventually we had a section of the trip that involved passing through 2 more Clan lands just to get to the place we were trying to get so we decided to take a boat to cut some of that out. The GM hadn't even considered that approach, and his exclamation of "You take a boat!?" was hilarious (we can get a similar "You took a boat!" out of him if we remind him of the incident even today, years later). That's not the in-joke though. That is the name of the skill he decided related to nautical things since he didn't know the rules for it (I'm not even sure 1st ed. even had rules for boats). That skill was "shippery" which quickly became the placeholder in any of our games for the related skill, especially if the character lacked any points in it. The only exception, I think, was...

Exalted. This is sort of a meta-game joke in that one time there was some sort of generic test-of-might/character type of roll that simply had us roll our highest Attribute+Ability. We had things like Dex+Martial Arts, Charisma+Presence, or Int+Occult. Stuff like that, sort of make sense, right? One guy's was Manipulation+Sail which was such an odd combination that it took us a while to figure out what sort of action would require that roll (I think we decided on "attempting to convince somebody that you were a pirate"). After that, to "roll Manipulation plus Sail" became shorthand for referring to requesting a character to roll something obvious that, due to knowledge of their character, they are almost assured to pass, no matter what game we were playing and the associated skill types.

Edit: Thought of another.

In an oWoD Hunter game. One member of the group had been knocked out during a fight. Another player said, "I pick him up and jump out the window," to which the GM replied "You're three stories up!" The player's response: "We'll worry about that when we're out the window." This became the standard interplay when somebody announced the intention of falling from a high place (i.e. "You're [however high you are] up!" "We'll worry about that when [situational appropriate circumstance]").

Zenos
2008-10-16, 11:51 AM
Well, in this Dark Heresy campaign, I played as a guardsman, my brother would play an assassin and a tech-priest. And the thing is, the Tech-priest could not fail at a logic check. More of a wierd coincidence than an in-joke, but ah well.
Now, I am going to play a S60 WS60 T40 (which shall be increased) Guardsman who walks around in melee ripping stuff up. Maybe he'll even defect to Khorne. The thing is, he is heavily scarred and has a low fellowship, and my brother has already called my other guardsman character, who had decent fellowship, and Ork...

EvilElitest
2008-10-17, 08:04 PM
Every time an NPC is about to be killed in a very brutal manner, like crushed under a rock or thrown onto a carrion collecter, he always goes "Ah bugger" really loudly
from
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