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View Full Version : How redendantly evil can you make YOUR NPC?



Thoughtbot360
2008-10-30, 11:26 AM
Try and out-cliche my villain, I dare you:

He's a crooked politician he murdered someone with his own two hands to cover up his necromancy hobby (which is fuelled by the corpses of people he hired to dig up), since said murder victime found out that he is really a Demon that is *possessing* said politicion. He also is funded by a Shark loan business he runs himself to fund his nerafious schemes. He has been conducting secret dealings with local goblin and orc tribes that he plans to use in his effort to overthrow the king and take over the nation. He also stole some jewels from an old lady, but mind you, they were actually ancient Artifacts of Doom (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ArtifactOfDoom). Then again, he did decide to steal her false teeth for giggles.

Oh, and did I mention that he is a demon-...of wife-beating?

jcsw
2008-10-30, 11:37 AM
Well if this is a hypothetical thing, my NPC is all that, and also a lawyer.

Dogmantra
2008-10-30, 11:39 AM
Does he wear nothing but black, with a cape and goatee? If not, he's not a proper cliche villan...

EDIT: As for a more cliche villain? I'd have to say you're spot on with the demon possessing him, but I'd say more along the lines of an outcast from society who went on a rage and slaughtered everyone in his village for no reason, made a deal with a demon to bring them back, but the demon double crossed him and now possesses his body. The villain is trying to align the three medallions on the altar of souls just as the sun is eclipsed by the moon. Why? Well, for world domination of course, he also kicks puppies. He videos it. Then puts them on youtube.

theMycon
2008-10-30, 11:40 AM
And mine kicks cute things.

BRC
2008-10-30, 11:47 AM
Bah, ameatur. Allow me

Doctor Baron Von Sinestro rules over the mountainous nation of Grimpeak where he conducts horrible experiments. He has a brainwashed army that he uses to raid other nations for slaves and test subjects for his twisted horrible experiments. He is also an accomplished necromancer, working his slaves to death and then raising them as massed hordes of zombies which he sends to raid and loot other nations in order to finance his dark, twisted, horrible experiments. He also works with both devils and demons, using their knowledge and power to improve the efficiency of his Dark, Fiendish, Twisted, Horrible experiments. He has a handlebar Moustach (always waxed with the blood of the innocent), a habit of revealing his plans to poorly secured foes, and a laugh so manical that it scares children and bruises fruit.
He is also the creator of reality television, 4chan, and politics.

Monstrodoom
2008-10-30, 12:02 PM
Don't forget your Speedo constructed of woven orphan scalps and the waxed, bloody severed head of a powerful celestial entity.

Oh, and the beautiful and serene bride kept in stasis in a block of ice, that all these horrible and twisted experiments are intended to save.. who is actually an evil Frankensteinein Prometheus constructed of demons, devils, illithid, snakes, and baby vomit. Oh, and she has Willem Dafoe's head, but a beautiful, beautiful Jessica Rabbit body. (Most of the experiments are to 'fix' her, by... either getting rid of the Dafoe head, or - and this is the kicker - to turn the rest of her into Willem Dafoe. Plus spiders. Maybe as boobs. Spider-boobs.)

Duke of URL
2008-10-30, 12:03 PM
Come Wednesday, you can hire the guys who write negative campaign ads in the States to make your BBEGs seem oh so much worse. They'll probably work cheap, too.

EvilElitest
2008-10-30, 12:04 PM
mine's eats a baby for breakfast every day. Why? Because he can
from
EE

Krrth
2008-10-30, 12:05 PM
Come Wednesday, you can hire the guys who write negative campaign ads in the States to make your BBEGs seem oh so much worse. They'll probably work cheap, too.

Heh....this is true.

Monstrodoom
2008-10-30, 12:08 PM
Ripping off Monty Python for this one:

Evil scheme to turn the world's population into drooling retards, just so the villain can win a softball game.

Bouregard
2008-10-30, 12:11 PM
"A virgin a day, keeps the scaleplague at bay."
Old dragon saying.

Ethdred
2008-10-30, 12:11 PM
He also is funded by a Shark loan business

My god! He lets other people borrow sharks in return for money? That IS evil. Don't the sharks have any say in this matter?

jcsw
2008-10-30, 12:31 PM
I believe the sharks are perfectly content to be temporarily used for evil schemes, seeing as they almost all entirely involve their eating of something.

JBento
2008-10-30, 12:32 PM
HAH! MY villain removes tags from mattresses.:smallamused:

EDIT: Also, he creates threads on alignment, paladins, and monks, he claims that Miko shouldn't have fallen and that Belkar is, indeed, Lawful Good.

And, to top it all off, he was responsible for the Star Wars prequels, the Matrix sequels and the D&D movie.

Beat THAT.

Amateurs...

Tehnar
2008-10-30, 12:46 PM
Joe is a foe so despicable, so cunningly evil that even the lords of abyss and the nine hells are in fear and awe of his power.

The players will typically first encounter Joe as a ringing noise in their head followed by a melodious voice saying: "Hi I'm Joe, could I interest you in our new line of products...."



P.S. No offence intended to any persons who are employed as such.

JBento
2008-10-30, 12:51 PM
Joe is a foe so despicable, so cunningly evil that even the lords of abyss and the nine hells are in fear and awe of his power.

The players will typically first encounter Joe as a ringing noise in their head followed by a melodious voice saying: "Hi I'm Joe, could I interest you in our new line of products...."



P.S. No offence intended to any persons who are employed as such.

"Such products will provide financial compensation should anything untowards happen to you or your possessions..."

EDIT: It's not their fault, really. I think they really ARE required to do talk like they do...

Eeep, double post

Nerd-o-rama
2008-10-30, 01:07 PM
Ripping off Monty Python for this one:

Evil scheme to turn the world's population into drooling retards, just so the villain can win a softball game.Actually, replace "softball" with "croquet", and that sounds an awful lot like the fourth Thursday Next novel.

EvilElitest
2008-10-30, 01:08 PM
my cliche villain is so evil he enjoys FATAL.....and Shreeded Moose
from
EE

Mastikator
2008-10-30, 01:09 PM
Mine is an organization of NPCs. Why? Because the whole is eviler than the sum of each part :D

Ahem.
A group of devil worshiping cultists summon a devil from the nine hells to worship. The devil gives them supernatural powers in return for souls (turns them into vampires).
The cultists invent a ritual that allows anyone to sacrifice the soul of any dying sapient being to the devil (the soul is thus destroyed), and they make it so it can't be seen and the one doing the ritual doesn't need to know the effects of it.
They then start a religion under the banner of good to lure good people to do this ritual to anyone when passing away. But they think they're going to a better place in the afterlife.
Only the cultists know what really happens to the souls, and the religion spreads. Thousands of souls are destroyed behind the veil.

This is actually an idea I have for a campaign setting I've been working on and off. :P
Acknowledge me, is it dark enough?

Dogmantra
2008-10-30, 01:10 PM
Also, he creates threads on alignment, paladins, and monks, he claims that Miko shouldn't have fallen and that Belkar is, indeed, Lawful Good.
Beat THAT.

Mine creates threads that discuss V's gender! HA!

Oracle_Hunter
2008-10-30, 01:14 PM
Bah, ameatur. Allow me

Doctor Baron Von Sinestro rules over the mountainous nation of Grimpeak where he conducts horrible experiments. He has a brainwashed army that he uses to raid other nations for slaves and test subjects for his twisted horrible experiments. He is also an accomplished necromancer, working his slaves to death and then raising them as massed hordes of zombies which he sends to raid and loot other nations in order to finance his dark, twisted, horrible experiments. He also works with both devils and demons, using their knowledge and power to improve the efficiency of his Dark, Fiendish, Twisted, Horrible experiments. He has a handlebar Moustach (always waxed with the blood of the innocent), a habit of revealing his plans to poorly secured foes, and a laugh so manical that it scares children and bruises fruit.
He is also the creator of reality television, 4chan, and politics.

For extra lulz:

His slaves work in an onyx mine - which is then used to turn them into various undeads.

Plus, he heats his castle with a kitten-powered furnace of his own design. :smallbiggrin:

Starbuck_II
2008-10-30, 01:32 PM
mine's eats a baby for breakfast every day. Why? Because he can
from
EE

Sounds like a Paladin I read once.


Mine is so evil: Some using on him Santify the Wicked/Mindrape turns the caster evil!
Also he eats Magic items.

Destro_Yersul
2008-10-30, 01:35 PM
Right, here's one for you. He's a fallen Paladin with a bloodthirsty daemonic sword. If he stops killing people with the sword for more than a week, the sword starts consuming his soul, allowing the Daemon in the sword to replace it. He has spiky black armour, glowing red eyes, and a cloak made from the cured skins of people he has tortured to death. Part #1 of the torture involving flaying them alive in order to obtain said skins. He only eats stew, made fresh each day from kittens and puppies. On weekends he adds babies to it just for fun.

v: He keeps the orphanages around so he can harvest souls from them. Defenceless children are prime fodder for the sword, y'know.

Thane of Fife
2008-10-30, 01:36 PM
Why have none of these villains foreclosed the mortgage on an orphanage? WHY?

That's classic evil!

TheCountAlucard
2008-10-30, 01:39 PM
Does he wear nothing but black, with a cape and goatse? If not, he's not a proper cliche villan...

Fixed it for you... (shudders)

Weezer
2008-10-30, 01:45 PM
Don't forget the villain is also the nefarious Grand Vizier giving bad advice and manipulating a naive but otherwise well meaning king.

Destro_Yersul
2008-10-30, 01:46 PM
Fixed it for you... (shudders)

I nominate this guy for 'most evil person in this thread'

You sir, are a horrible horrible person. :smalltongue:

Telonius
2008-10-30, 02:15 PM
My villain starts threads discussing alignment, monks, and which edition is best.

OverdrivePrime
2008-10-30, 02:23 PM
He is also the creator of reality television, 4chan, and politics. Flawless Victory!

You guys have all forgotten to add "Mime" to your creature's base template.

monty
2008-10-30, 02:31 PM
Fixed it for you... (shudders)

While you're at it, can I borrow some bleach? My brain needs cleaning.

TheCountAlucard
2008-10-30, 02:35 PM
I nominate this guy for 'most evil person in this thread'

You sir, are a horrible horrible person. :smalltongue:

Err, bwahaha? :smallsmile:

Yukitsu
2008-10-30, 02:39 PM
I've always wanted to make a diviner BBEG who determined who the party hero was going to be years before he would foil his plans, then used that knowledge to go find that guy as the baby, enchant him/her as his phylactery then watch as his freinds either have to kill him/her, or watch as the BBEG constantly comes back. Bonus points if you kill his parents and make him an orphan. Bonus bonus points if you burn down the orphanage for kicks. Bonus bonus bonus points if you're his/her father.

Of course, the question is why not kill him when he's a baby? Because that breaks the trope, obviously.

OverdrivePrime
2008-10-30, 02:42 PM
While you're at it, can I borrow some bleach? My brain needs cleaning.

Gotcha covered. http://i177.photobucket.com/albums/w219/mwellenstein/Lose/brainbleach.gif

Destro_Yersul
2008-10-30, 03:13 PM
Err, bwahaha? :smallsmile:

Indeed. Nice Avatar, btw. Somehow 'Paladin' Anderson fits this thread... :smallwink:

Starbuck_II
2008-10-30, 03:17 PM
I've always wanted to make a diviner BBEG who determined who the party hero was going to be years before he would foil his plans, then used that knowledge to go find that guy as the baby, enchant him/her as his phylactery then watch as his freinds either have to kill him/her, or watch as the BBEG constantly comes back. Bonus points if you kill his parents and make him an orphan. Bonus bonus points if you burn down the orphanage for kicks. Bonus bonus bonus points if you're his/her father.

Of course, the question is why not kill him when he's a baby? Because that breaks the trope, obviously.

Didn't you just describe Harry Potter?

Fax Celestis
2008-10-30, 03:18 PM
my cliche villain is so evil he enjoys FATAL.

Mine wrote FATAL. In Steve Jackson's blood.

Yukitsu
2008-10-30, 03:18 PM
Didn't you just describe Harry Potter?

Not inso far as I know. Didn't read it.

hamishspence
2008-10-30, 03:20 PM
lots of tropes, some potterish ones- if you don't want to know, don't look.

- though in Potter phylactery (of sorts) was created accidentally and Voldy didn't know it.

Thane of Fife
2008-10-30, 03:25 PM
Well, mine goes around and makes sure that everyone has perfectly happy childhoods and that there are no orphans, so as to ensure that no heroes arise to stop his, uh... diabolical designs?

Maybe I should have thought that one through better.

Irreverent Fool
2008-10-30, 03:58 PM
I've always wanted to make a diviner BBEG who determined who the party hero was going to be years before he would foil his plans, then used that knowledge to go find that guy as the baby, enchant him/her as his phylactery then watch as his freinds either have to kill him/her, or watch as the BBEG constantly comes back. Bonus points if you kill his parents and make him an orphan. Bonus bonus points if you burn down the orphanage for kicks. Bonus bonus bonus points if you're his/her father.

Of course, the question is why not kill him when he's a baby? Because that breaks the trope, obviously.

This has effectively happened in the campaign I am currently in.

My villain does everything posted above and also turns into a giant snake.
obnoxious
sig

Yukitsu
2008-10-30, 03:59 PM
This has effectively happened in the campaign I am currently in.

Who's the unlucky PC with the douche for a father? :smallconfused:

Irreverent Fool
2008-10-30, 04:23 PM
Who's the unlucky PC with the douche for a father? :smallconfused:

Well, our original party consisted of Sledge: the fighter, Duke: the sorcerer, Pighat*: the rogue and Melriach: the wizard (my character).

We found out over the course of several adventures that Duke's magic power was unprecedented within his family and it turned out he was a doorstep baby. We discovered that his original progenitor was an ancient lich who -- before lichdom -- prepared a ritual to make his only son into his phylactery and also grant said son immortality. The unintended catch was that should his son produce an offspring, that new child would become the phylactery and the original would die at the birth of the child. Well, it got out of hand and the line got out of his direct control and he lost track of it. Several hundred years later, he re-emerges after having been trapped in a war sometime back (the lich re-emerges, that is) and senses the presence of Duke.

This is not a typical lich. He's more of a military general-type, rather than the normal prerequisite spellcaster.

We discover the cultists performing the ritual to bring the lich back to life, and stop him just as he is rising. Even weakened by the incomplete ritual, he's pretty tough. We chain him with shackles given to us by the elves and trap him in a heavily-warded dungeon cell beneath their cathedral. The elves reveal that the callings Duke was hearing are due to the fact that he is bound to the lich. Duke's skull has become the phylactery.

Luckily for Duke, his only relations have been with wenches in the red-lantern districts, so any potential offspring have been eliminated before they could become the new phylactery.

Well, our characters aren't about the crush our old friend's skull! We figure that should Duke fall in battle or of old age, then we will destroy his skull and deal with the lich once and for all.

Well, Duke fell in battle (Halfling nat-20'd a mechanical dragon that had an internal fire sac, causing it to explode. Duke was the only one in range without a protection from energy: fire spell on him). Melriach volunteered to do what was necessary, but in actuality performed the normal burial rites and took the skull to study. Melriach is very interested in all aspects of magic and is of the opinion that there is no such thing as evil knowledge.

Another ancient evil had begun to resurface: the demigoddess Ty'beet, the one responsible from stealing magic from the elves and bringing it to humanity (spoiler: she's incredibly evil!). We had no way to stop her, but as the lich had been a general in her army in ages past, we thought we might interrogate him, using the skull as leverage -- this required Melriach to reveal he still had it of course.

Well, the skull ended up getting stolen when we rescued the former leader of the thieves' guild of Sambria from Ty'beet's cultist's clutches. They were planning to use her as a sacrifice in part of a ritual to open up a gate to some lower plane where Ty'beet and her cultists had planned to learn even more secrets for humanity. The party screwed up her efforts of course and destabilized the portal... causing it to open to an alternate plane and summoning a Bebilith, which we had to fight.

The rogue queen ran off in the night with many of our things... including the skull.

* I forget what his real name is. The characters killed a giant boar early on and Sledge and Melriach wanted to make use of their craft: leatherworking skills. So they made him a little masterwork leather cap with pig ears on it. He has since gained a reputation among the underground of the characters' 'home' city. There he is known as THE pighat.

obnoxious
sig

chiasaur11
2008-10-30, 04:36 PM
Mine is identical to Black Mage from 8-bit theater in every detail.

Because, the only thing worse than an incredibly evil guy is an incredibly evil guy with no creativity.

Demons_eye
2008-10-30, 04:41 PM
Mine is so insanly evil he blew his own MIND thinking up one of his plans.

KillianHawkeye
2008-10-30, 05:28 PM
Mine wears a suit made of kittens and shoes made of babies. Live babies. He uses his political power to ruin the kingdom's economy while padding his own kitten-fur pockets. He also wears a top hat and monocle, and walks with a cane made from poached unicorn horns. And in his spare time, he is that dude from SAW.

LordZarth
2008-10-30, 07:32 PM
Level 25 Demonic Lawyers? Ha. I laugh in your face!

Mine is a level 1 Auditor. Pwn'd.

Demented
2008-10-30, 08:01 PM
My villain is a dragon.

On Sundays, he shines his scales with the tears of the innocent and picks his teeth with their sharpened femurs.

On Mondays, he starts his day with a drink of wine flavored with a touch of virgin blood, and prefers a rousing thunderstorm. While eating his morning breakfast, he listens to a pipe organ enchanted with the captured souls of a thousand tortured orphans. The sound is very unique. A typical monday evening involves a sacrifice, preferably the prettiest peasant girl of the land, to bless the work week that is to come.

On Tuesdays, the ritual torturing of slaves commences. He prefers to watch and give advice to his newer 'torturists' on nerve clusters and psychological domination. Those torturists who do not listen well to instruction are imprisoned to be experimented on throughout the week by novice torturists-in-training. For prisoners, special attention is paid, and some Very Important Prisoners may even earn a monologue and elaborate, painful execution, with optional soul trapping. Escape, while possible, requires navigating an ancient obstacle course under the mountain, with appropriate use of lava and toxic fumes.

On Wednesdays, he takes the opportunity to treat the lords under his sway to a feast! Stuffed kittens and hamsters are served as hor'deuvres, while the main course is a herd of animated roast pork. The feasting hall is lit by brimstone torches and lined with undead archers and attendants. For safety, the food is tasted by randomly selected (and sometimes abducted) family members of the evil lords invited to the table. Entertainment is provided by a ballet performance and an orchestra of fallen archons; the intermission is a group of magicians who specialize in novel ways of tormenting puppies (from which souvenirs are available). Afterwards, the ballet girls are encouraged to seduce the guests in competition with a small harem of succubi; failure for the girls implies lack of appeal, and may result in being demoted to a lower service position, or a swift execution if one pleads earnestly enough.

On Thursdays, breakfast is frequently a mash of breastmilk-fed babies, because today is work, work, work! By noon, all the fresh servant undead must be animated, and the necromancers beaten until exhaustion. He enjoys a meal of cheese and fruit while watching his lich general whip the undead into shape. By early evening, experiments need to be set up and started. For the rest of the day, experimentation is priority, especially on celestials or the invocation of undiscovered ancient evils. Prisoners and slaves that weren't important or viable enough for Tuesday's rituals are sometimes used in secondary experiments in golem-making or undead animation. By midnight there are enough failed secondary experiments to release into the countryside.

On Fridays, he consults with devils and demons for the latest trends in evil fashionware and apparel. A small town is always scheduled for a decent razing by dragonbreath, and townspeople may be chained in their houses if too many are healthy enough to attempt escape. Escapees are hunted down with the help of dogs and imprisoned or enslaved. Orphans may be added to improve the catch. While the hunting party enjoys their celebratory feast, my dragon enjoys counting his loot over a warm bowl of unicorntail soup. His treasure is watched over by enchained celestials to ensure that nothing is stolen, or at least that the amount stolen is honestly recorded.

On Saturdays, he enjoys luxuriating after a hard week of work. Favorites activities include smoking a cigar made from the skins of unborn children, adopting a moustache sharp enough to engrave glass and curly enough to induce hypnosis, or corrupting the souls of siblings and then enchanting them into world-destroying weapons or sentient briefcases. A long walk on the beach with the current evil queen is also a favorite past-time, sometimes accompanied with devouring her black heart later that night.

P.S.
My villain is looking for an apprentice.
Do you know of someone evil enough to qualify?

Weiser_Cain
2008-10-30, 11:47 PM
My assassin has infected herself with a deadly plague that will become active in the event of her death, it only affects children at first, so you get to watch your family die.

Biffoniacus_Furiou
2008-10-31, 12:27 AM
I played a noble Necropolitan Dread Necromancer who had a Slaymate companion, which happened to be his own daughter who'd died due to parental negligence.

Demented
2008-10-31, 12:38 AM
Slaymate companion [...] his own daughter who'd died due to parental negligence.

That's so redundantly Evil that it's almost Good!

...At least from the view of a redundantly Evil relationship counselor...

Dyvim Matt
2008-10-31, 08:02 AM
While all the ideas presented so far are really good, to make the bad guy truely redundantly evil, you need to make sure that no matter how many times the players achieve a victory over him, he comes back for revenge. Bonus points if he comes back through a really convoluted loophole in the PCs' carefully thought plan.

For that cliché feeling, make sure he commits any and all the atrocities mentioned, but to achieve a very very vague goal. Does he want to dominate the world? Then make sure nobody finds out why, or simply because he's evil, bwahaha!

Drakefall
2008-10-31, 10:57 AM
Mine bent the laws of space, time and lemons to force 4chan into a corporeal form which he then proceeded to eat... and it did... nothing. Yes, he is so Evil that the consumption of 4chan itself had no effect on him. No possession, no explosion, no anti-matter creation. Not even indigestion (which he, incidently, is the god of).

Also he wears nothing but thigh high spiked boots and a black cape.

Irreverent Fool
2008-10-31, 03:44 PM
Mine bent the laws of space, time and lemons to force 4chan into a corporeal form which he then proceeded to eat... and it did... nothing. Yes, he is so Evil that the consumption of 4chan itself had no effect on him. No possession, no explosion, no anti-matter creation. Not even indigestion (which he, incidently, is the god of).

Also he wears nothing but thigh high spiked boots and a black cape.

There is no such thing as 4chan. Surely you must be referring to ebaumsworld.