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Kris Strife
2008-11-05, 11:44 PM
As a requested spin off of 'The craziest thing you've tried to get past a DM' thread, name a wizard from any series and their effect in any system you choose. If any one knows how to add in quotes from another thread on a PSP, let me know and I'll add them here.

The Glyphstone
2008-11-06, 12:25 AM
Vaarsuvius: Drones on at length about the superiority of arcane magic, forcing all intelligent creatures within earshot to risk falling asleep.

monty
2008-11-06, 12:30 AM
Not a wizard per se, but Xykon. Randomly shoots out magic missiles out of boredom.

Kris Strife
2008-11-06, 12:41 AM
Not a wizard per se, but Xykon. Randomly shoots out magic missiles out of boredom.

doesnt have to be a wizard by D&D standards. We had Rincewind, Richard Rhal, and Morgan le Fay in the origional set. Heck, the starter examples were Gandalf and Fizban.

SurlySeraph
2008-11-06, 12:43 AM
Walter o'Dim: Walks up grinning. Saves any evil-aligned party members from their current predicament if they promise to serve him, threatens any good-aligned party members and warns them to give up their quest, then leaves. If any creature attacks him, he may counterattack with Contagion or Shocking Grasp, though he prefers to order one of the party members to defend him.

Kurald Galain
2008-11-06, 04:55 AM
Nakor. Hands everybody within 60 feet an orange, then disappears.

jcsw
2008-11-06, 05:53 AM
Wicked Witch of the West.

Summons 1d10 Flying Monkeys to attack random creatures.

bosssmiley
2008-11-06, 05:59 AM
Elric: brings about Armageddon, bitches about it.

Kurald Galain
2008-11-06, 06:28 AM
Syrup the apprentice witch. Flies into a randomly chosen party member, causing everything in his inventory to fall on the ground, spread over within a 30 foot radius. Syrup's inventory likewise falls on the ground: 1d4-1 potions of healing, 2d6 platinum pieces, and one randomly selected magical item. Each round, Syrup moves to the closest pile of items and pick them all up; if none are left, she flies off.

Coidzor
2008-11-06, 06:44 AM
let's see... Rincewind... He obviously runs by screaming, possibly followed by the luggage. Damn, I think this guy needs a percentile dice roll to determine what happens when he does run by. Maybe....

Roll percentile dice, on a roll of


1-32: Rincewind runs by, everyone must make a will save or be completely enraptured by the sight of this strange fellow running by and whatever is pursuing him and oh god it's got so many little legs. Those who fail that will save make a second, more difficult will save or be affected by a geas to join in the chase.

33-65: Rincewind runs by, everyone makes a save versus being distracted, but whatever was most recently following him takes an interest in the proceedings and joins in the fracas as a third side.

66-99: Rincewind runs by, followed by the luggage. The luggage inflicts a fear effect on any who watch it devour anything. Those who manage to make their save are still shaken for 1d4 rounds. Those eaten are treated as either shoved in a portable hole or shunted bodily into the astral plane.

100: Rincewind unleashes one of the 8 elder spells that created the universe, except it doesn't want to leave so it casts an 8th level spell that appears to be appropriate to the situation.

Drascin
2008-11-06, 07:00 AM
I'll just repost my previous post there...


Do they have to be wizard wizards, with hermetic magic and such, or all magic users are fair game?

Also, is someone getting all this? We must compile this into an actual Rod-of-Wonder-like table. I did have a "Videogame Summoning Rod" in one of my games once. If you rolled a 1 Kefka would appear and laugh at you :smallbiggrin:

Aanyway, some more wizardly types...

Lina Inverse: Chants Dragonslayer, makes an area about three kilometers wide around her nuclearly explode. Both enemies and allies. If you get this result, you better hope your Reflex save is up to par. Then asks you for a huge monetary reward for her trouble.

Zelgadis: Tries to blast opponent, fails utterly because he's the epitome of Worfing. Then remembers that hey, he's a nearly indestructible gish, and slashes the enemy's face open while snarking like there's no tomorrow.

Marisa Kirisame: Enters scene by smashing herself against the enemy leader on her broom, dusts off, and proceeds to blow up every enemy that doesn't immediately start running like hell with high-powered magical lasers. Then she comes to politely say goodbye, winks at you, and speeds away much like she arrived. Later you notice that any spellbook and/or shiny magical bauble owned by your party has misteriously disappeared.

Patchouli Knowledge: Roll another d100. On a result of 75 or better, she's feeling fine today - and so she opens her book and reduces your enemies to their base atoms with the power of all elements combined. On a result worse than 75, however, she's feeling ill, and she falls down coughing when she tries casting, falling prone and cursing her weakness in thirteen different languages.

Irreverent Fool
2008-11-06, 08:49 AM
Gandalf: Provides the benefit of a light spell on his staff for up to 10 rounds, all the while giving you the general feeling that he is a powerful figure, but not exactly giving you any evidence of the fact. After the light spell snuffs out, he assure you that he'll meet you up the road at the next inn and rides off on an incredibly fast horse that you didn't realize he had, insisting he has something important to take care of.

obnoxious
sig

Zeful
2008-11-06, 09:05 AM
William Ivering Zumalt (aka, WIZ or Sparrow): Having been through this already, he's angry and so infects magic with a virus making all magic everywhere stop working. Nice job hero.

Suzuro
2008-11-06, 09:17 AM
Crimson King: Stands on a balcony and looks menacing....(Okay, so he's not a wizard but he wears a robe!).


-Suzuro

Drakefall
2008-11-06, 09:28 AM
Granny Weatherwax: Her presence makes everyone in the immediate area put away their silly weapons and spells, to go home to their mothers/wives/jobs and to behave themselves for 1d20 years.

Tengu_temp
2008-11-06, 09:39 AM
Nanoha: beamspams one enemy for 314d6 nonlethal damage. When they regain consciousness, their attitude towards the party changes to Friendly.

ShneekeyTheLost
2008-11-06, 09:46 AM
William Ivering Zumalt (aka, WIZ or Sparrow): Having been through this already, he's angry and so infects magic with a virus making all magic everywhere stop working. Nice job hero.

If Wiz is ever attacked, he has a 50% chance of either becomming an invulnerable statue, or encasing himself in a bubble.

WirePaladin
2008-11-06, 12:16 PM
Think these were the ones I used~

You summon the mad arab....he offers to read you a passage from his book...and than summons devils and demons...

You summon Milamber / Pug...he opens a rift between worlds! and than for some reason even though he's got mad god powers he needs your help to fix things...

You summon Faust...he watch's you die...than walks off (or raises you from the dead as zombies to carry his bags)

You summon Morgan le Fay...who has a girl with her that looks...oddly familiar and after winning the encounter for you...wants to make baby O_O

You summon Zed from the sword of truth...he hits on your grandmother and while you have the image of him sleeping with your grandma in your mind you suffer a -5 to all atk rolls

You summon Circe...there is something...about her... (BAM baleful polymorph...no save)

You summon the wizard of oz! he throws tiny pigs at the enemy and gives the party a chance to run away...to and or from kansas...avoid the desert O_O

Elric of Melnibone - Appears!...and acts kind of emo for a bit...no affect on the party...but the girls who swarm up to try to get a piece of him make trample attacks on the enemies.
Or his whiteness could blind all on the field?

AND OR
flip a coin...on heads Elric is in his chaos period...bad news a chaos lord shows up...
on tails..Elric is getting some lawful aid...bad news a lord of law shows up...and you thought santa's naughty list was too tough

If someone cheats and it lands on an edge...a d4 to get one of the elemental lords...anything but water attacks...water just whines for a bit...and gives the party a boat of folding~

on a roll of 19...
Rod Gallowglass has his ship crash land on one enemy...summons his robotic horse which tramples an opponent...confuses the party by transfering a robot brain...than uses his massive magical powers to...pull a gun and shoot any remaining enemies

Any gnomes in the party must assume Rod is a warlock...inspite of himself O_O


If you roll the d100 while it's raining there is a chance that Creslin will show up...whine for a bit...cut up some folks...and than summon massive waterspouts and change the planets weather

Tsukasa shows up!...roll %...on a 1-20 morganna is still his babies momma...he has his monster balls attack you...21-60 he whines and runs away...61-90 he uses amazing dot hack magic to make himself realize he shouldnt be a wavemaster because they suck...and goes off to become a twin blade...91-100 he realizes he's not a male at all...and has to explain it to his girlfriend...while you, your party, and all of the monsters watch...

Thomas Covenant shows up...doesn't believe he's actually there...rapes the first female party member he encounters...than alternating between guilt and more disbelief saves the day...if no female party members are present...he wonders off trying to disprove his environment

Dungeon master shows up!...offers crappy cryptic advice that will make sense once you no longer need any advice

Jimmy Woods shows up! casts the spell video game armageddon...odviously hacks super mario brothers 3...getting all secret flutes the first time he plays...and uses the flutes to summon a tornado...tornado takes him and your opponents away...he never says a word. on a d100 if you a roll a 100 he does stutter out a cali...forn...ia

"The power glove. It's so bad, it's cool."

Siegel
2008-11-06, 01:22 PM
Nahema : An astonishing beautifull chick in chainmal drives by in a carriage and nearly knocks over the heroes. If the DM want she lets the heroes change bodys.

Its from Das Schwarze Auge / The dark eye

Bayar
2008-11-06, 02:05 PM
Lina Inverse: Chants Dragonslayer, makes an area about three kilometers wide around her nuclearly explode. Both enemies and allies. If you get this result, you better hope your Reflex save is up to par. Then asks you for a huge monetary reward for her trouble.

Zelgadis: Tries to blast opponent, fails utterly because he's the epitome of Worfing. Then remembers that hey, he's a nearly indestructible gish, and slashes the enemy's face open while snarking like there's no tomorrow.


I wonder why I was expecting to see these names :smallbiggrin:

Adumbration
2008-11-06, 02:21 PM
Tim the Enchanter: Shoots a fireball at a random target with each sentence he speaks.

Saph
2008-11-06, 02:31 PM
Richard Rahl from the Sword of Truth: Launches into a monologue on Objectivist philosophy. All intelligent creatures within earshot who can understand him must make a DC 25 Will save or be affected as if by a confusion spell. As soon as anyone attacks him, Richard automatically kills them (no save) and departs.

Getafix: 90% chance that he hands out vials of magic potion to anyone who asks him nicely. The vials give +50 Strength for 10 minutes, but only as long as the subject doesn't use a weapon. 10% chance that the potions instead produce the effect of a greater bestow curse.

Rand Al'Thor: Roll percentile dice.

01-70: He appears and immediately kills any enemies the party are fighting using a variety of horrible and imaginative high-level magical attacks.
71-90: As above, but he accidentally catches 1d4 PCs in the blast radius and kills them too. If any of the PCs are female, he will feel really guilty about this and proceed to memorise their names and faces.
91-99: As above, but this time he kills everyone in range indiscriminately because the VOICES just WON'T STOP TALKING! WHY WILL THE DEAD NOT BE SILENT!
100: Roll again, except everyone killed has been hit with balefire and is now unressurectable. Yes, even with Wish.

Sephiroth: He flies into a rage and causes the sun to go supernova, engulfing most of the solar system. Strangely, this has no effect beyond reducing all creatures in the area to 10% of their current hitpoints, and the sun goes back to normal afterwards.

- Saph

Dogmantra
2008-11-06, 03:09 PM
Harry Houdini: Shows up, breaks one party member out of handcuffs, then leaves through a really strange exit.

Kurald Galain
2008-11-06, 03:10 PM
Radagast. He causes plants to grow a few inches within a 100-foot radius. Then he wanders off again.

Vainamoinen. He provides the entire party with as much food as they can carry, and flies away.

Professor McGonagall. She can't actually do anything productive, and waits for the kids to upstage her.

paddyfool
2008-11-06, 03:21 PM
Tidied up version of my suggestions from the other thread:

John Constantine: Sends your enemies to hell. All party members must roll a d20 - anyone rolling a 1 is dragged along for the ride.

Phantom Stranger: does nothing much, other than making mystic pronouncements. Might help you escape if you are very evidently the good guys

Harry Potter: Wins the encounter for you by shouting something in fake latin; party is forced to cringe in shame, then find way to send him back to the Rowlingverse asap

Hermione: As Harry, but more efficient.

Voldemort: Kills whoever summoned him for their hubris and anyone else who talks back (party or otherwise), takes any obviously valuable magic items, leaves.

Dr Strange: Wins the encounter, then devastates surrounding area in duel with Dormammu.

Merlin: Wins the encounter; summons you to medieval England to help him fight Morgaine in return

Raistlin: Wins the encounter, coughs blood over you, wanders off to look into possibility of killing gods

Shazam: Grants your party's most obviously heroic member superpowers, and then stands back to see if said party member can win the encounter with them.

Elminster: Wins the encounter, gives you annoying side quest

Zatanna: Says "niw I" and does. Flirts briefly with some manly or cute figure in party then says "emoh" and vanishes.

Aleister Crowley: Runs away. Starts cult.

Thane of Fife
2008-11-06, 03:32 PM
From before:


Sephrenia: Appears and makes disparaging remarks about the general level of uncleanliness / bloodthirstiness / lack of intelligence of all male members of the party. If the party is in combat, every party member is Geased to protect Sephrenia. After the combat, she will offer no thanks, instead tongue-lashing them for being so barbaric as to kill people. In social scenes, she will directly state how everybody else's race is inferior to her's, but all NPCs will merely find this adorable, as opposed to insulting.

In the unlikely event that the PCs are preparing to sneak past something, Sephrenia uses her magic to sneak them past it, automatically being successful. She berates any magic-users in the party for not knowing how she did it.


And two new ones:

Maya Fey: Hangs around with the party making crazy observations until the PCs are completely screwed. Then she immediately channels Mia, who gives all PCs a +20 circumstance bonus to all d20 rolls until the end of the encounter.

Mialee: Casts a spell from the scroll she scribed. After the encounter, assuming the PCs survived, they have, like, a 50-50 chance of being attacked by a Displacer Beast - or, like, 50 of them!

Knaight
2008-11-06, 03:35 PM
Cudgel. Casts a spell, and it backfires horribly. Entrails fall out of one opponent and turn into bees, as cudgel vanishes yelling "huh?"

Edward Elric. Claps his hands, touches the ground, roll 1d4.
1-A masterwork spear with an extra 2 hardness pops out of the ground
2-His metal arm grows a blade out of it and he rushes one enemy.
3-An enemies metal armor fuses together at the joints.
4-He makes a cannon. A big cannon.

Roy Mustang. Snaps his fingers, one enemy must make a dc 25 reflex save or take 10d6 fire damage.

Mephit
2008-11-06, 04:29 PM
Gandalf: Provides the benefit of a light spell on his staff for up to 10 rounds, all the while giving you the general feeling that he is a powerful figure, but not exactly giving you any evidence of the fact. After the light spell snuffs out, he assure you that he'll meet you up the road at the next inn and rides off on an incredibly fast horse that you didn't realize he had, insisting he has something important to take care of.

Don't forget: He changes color every time you summon him!

horngeek
2008-11-06, 04:34 PM
Dumbledore: appears, binds all of your enemies, reveals plot points, then dissapears.

Kris Strife
2008-11-06, 04:36 PM
my suggestion from previous thread

Ridicully: Ignores the problem to yell at you about paperwork, food, importance of team work, and exercise for 20 rounds or until attacked, then promptly fireballs attacker. leaves a bottle of edible Alchemists Fire.

ashmanonar
2008-11-06, 04:42 PM
Harry Dresden (from Storm Front)

Comes running up, makes a few genre savvy remarks about the enemy you're fighting, burns down the building you're in at great personal cost, and limps off.

Harry Dresden (from Dead Beat)

Rides up on a reanimated T-Rex, with a short Jewish medical examiner playing a Polka suit, makes a few witty remarks, hits the guy forming a giant vortex of death, and runs the body-swapped Chief Warden through with his sword.

Harry Dresden (from Small Favor)

Jumps through a portal from the NeverNever, unleashes his personal faerie guard (Victory to the Za-Lord!), laughs with a Gruff wizard for 3 minutes, then strangles the BBEG with his own rope noose. Proceeds to swear loudly at God, and gets joshed by an Archangel.

Epinephrine
2008-11-06, 04:43 PM
Catweazle: Threatens folks with a small knife (named Adamcos). Upon anything the least bit dangeous occuring, hides in corner, blowing on his thumb ring while chanting, ''sator arepo tenet opera rotas''. If there is no danger, roll a d4:

1.) Becomes convinced that someone has captured his soul. Threatens/begs/cajoles/whimpers until he gets the object that captured his soul.
2.) Loses his familiar, a large, warty toad with no apparent abilities, and searches for it frantically.
3.) Sees himself in a mirror, thinks that he's seen his own ghost, and that he therefore must have died. Panic ensues.
4.) Chants something odd in Latin, disappears, and subsequently needs to be rescued from the side of something high.

Heliomance
2008-11-06, 04:50 PM
Harry Dresden (from Storm Front)

Comes running up, makes a few genre savvy remarks about the enemy you're fighting, burns down the building you're in at great personal cost, and limps off.

Harry Dresden (from Dead Beat)

Rides up on a reanimated T-Rex, with a short Jewish medical examiner playing a Polka suit, makes a few witty remarks, hits the guy forming a giant vortex of death, and runs the body-swapped Chief Warden through with his sword.

Harry Dresden (from Small Favor)

Jumps through a portal from the NeverNever, unleashes his personal faerie guard (Victory to the Za-Lord!), laughs with a Gruff wizard for 3 minutes, then strangles the BBEG with his own rope noose. Proceeds to swear loudly at God, and gets joshed by an Archangel.

Hmm. Bit specific, methinks. After all, he's the same guy in all of them.

Oslecamo
2008-11-06, 05:00 PM
Clow: hands stupidly powerfull magic artifact to the cutest member of the party. No manual included tough. Then dies, ressurects in a new form and haunts said party member for the rest of his/her life, wich isn't going to be very long, due to Clow submiting him/her to harder and harder trials for his own amusement.


Horus the betrayer: charms monster half the party, proceeds to try to conquer over the world, then when he's at the verge of victory he lets down ALL his defenses and lets himself be killed.

Jainda Proudmore: Summons large water elementals to fight and casts sleet storm, but as soon as she takes an hit she teleports herself and all the party to a safe heaven. Players recover expended spells/power points faster than normal while near her.

Cloud:Hits people with super oversized sword and makes everything move slow motion, but really doesn't deal much damage, unless his oponent is huge or larger, then he deals lots of damage.

Link:Kills all the enemies you were facing fast and effeciently with a various assortment of tools and swordmanship, but takes all the loot for himself and then disapears playing some instrument. I no enemies are nearby, he'll breack all nearby boxes, rocks, pots and cut down plants, revealing loads of hidden treasure inside them(wich he also takes for himself).

memnarch
2008-11-06, 05:38 PM
Chrono Trigger: roll 1d4

1) Chrono; Shows up, stand around looking a bit, battle music starts (ghost sound spell), he draws a katana, casts Luminaire (sunburst; ecl 20) in the square that's equidistant from the two furthest apart enemies. Music ends and he disappears.

2) Lucca; Shows up, talks about how cool her inventions are, battle music starts (ghost sound spell), she draws a gun, casts Flare (meteor swarm; ecl 20) in the square that's equidistant from the two furthest apart enemies. Music ends and she disappears.

3) Marle; Shows up, talks about Chrono, battle music starts (ghost sound spell), she draws a crossbow, casts Ice 2 (Ice Storm) in the square that's equidistant from the two furthest apart enemies or Life 2 (true resurrection; casting time 1 standard action) on a character who's dead. (life 2 preference) Music ends and she disappears.

4) Magus; Shows up, talks about his life, battle music starts (ghost sound spell), he draws a scyth, casts Dark Matter (sunburst, except darkness instead of light; ecl 20) in the square that's equidistant from the two furthest apart enemies. Music ends and he disappears.

Kurald Galain
2008-11-06, 05:43 PM
Kirby. Sucks up and eats a random enemies, then uses that attack on another random enemy, then flies off towards the rainbow.

hotel_papa
2008-11-06, 07:15 PM
River Tam Wanders, barefoot into the battle, looking around at nothing in particular. She says bizarred, cryptic things which have a 25% chance of being funny. This continues until the party is about to die or she establishes akward sexual tension with a male in the party who has described his character as "badass", whichever comes first. Then, she beats up everyone.

Geralt of Rivia Appears, drinks a foul-smelling potion, freaks out for a second, kills everything with a combination of swordplay, runic magic and albino polish badassery, then has sex with all women present before demanding to be paid.

Wil Wheaton Says "Don't be a ****." Everyone makes a DC 40 will save or permanantly becomes neutral good. Demons and other "always evil" creatures instead are transformed into sniveling, irrelevant teenagers who systematically destroy all that was interesting about the current campaign arc.

Joss Whedon Appears, kills everyone's favorite NPC, but in exchange grants everyone else a level in badass from no other discernable origin. He then leaves, tending to the seventeen other PC groups on his watchlist.


HP

Shhalahr Windrider
2008-11-06, 08:45 PM
Ulrich of Craggenmoor: The first time he is summoned, he is killed by the party's opponents. The second time he is summoned, he engages battle with the party's most powerful opponent. Shortly thereafter, they grapple, and Ulrich explodes, killing the opponent along with himself.

Miracle Max: Complains about being summoned. Only helps out party after being guilted into it. Bestows upon party a single-use possibly-magical item that would "take a miracle" to work. Surprisingly enough, it does.

Blackwolf: Uses Nazi propaganda films to incite fighting rage among allies.

Avatar of Montagar: Bluffs enemy into preparing for a magical duel before pulling a gun and shooting enemy instead.

WirePaladin
2008-11-06, 11:55 PM
You summon Akiro (From the conan movies) he narrates a part of your adventure...if called to do any magic he simply makes grunting sounds till you solve the problem yourself...or pass out (in which case he runs away)

Laharl shows up, claims your heroes are useless and that he should be the hero of the story, you can either try to fight him or become his vassals giving him almost no actual money but fluffing his giant ego, if there are any undead in the form of penguins in the party they must do as he wishes...or explode

Pleinair shows up, she can teleport your party wherever they dont know they want to go yet! Or she can give you random bits of news that have nothing at all to do with anything at all, but for some reason are glorious and funny all the same

If your going to summon Sephiroth you damn well better summon...

Kefka - Laughing mad, Kefka approaches laughing, you take the total number of PC's and NPC's present and break them into one on one brackets...at which point you flip a coin...whoever loses any given coin toss has annoyed kefka...he kills them. Those he doesnt kill he swears revenge on...keeps showing up after every other boss fight...
(The dead pc's will ressurect after but have horrible dreams of waking up on an island with a guy in a banana outfit, and fishing...for ever ~_~)

Finally when you think he's done or the arc is ending...he transforms 4 times...all of which by this point are far to low level to bother your epic level characters.

...ps he hates you