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Doom Cellist
2008-11-19, 09:42 PM
Alright so I've got three players. One is an excellent role player, One play's the same person over and over. The third always plays the "Strong silent type" So he doesn't have to make a personality. I've tried many things ,threatening, blackmail, everything what do you suggest I do.

Starsinger
2008-11-19, 09:44 PM
Alright so I've got three players. One is an excellent role player, One play's the same person over and over. The third always plays the "Strong silent type" So he doesn't have to make a personality. I've tried many things ,threatening, blackmail, everything what do you suggest I do.

Did you try bonus XP for good role playing?

arguskos
2008-11-19, 09:44 PM
On a related tangent, what do I do for a player that just likes sitting there like a lump whilst the others rp? I mean, I've talked to them, and they claim to merely like the numbers. *shrug* It's not a HUGE deal, but it does bother me, since I like to see the players rp a little more than "let's loot the room, give me my gold, thanks."

NOTE: I do not use XP.

Doom Cellist
2008-11-19, 09:59 PM
On a related tangent, what do I do for a player that just likes sitting there like a lump whilst the others rp? I mean, I've talked to them, and they claim to merely like the numbers. *shrug* It's not a HUGE deal, but it does bother me, since I like to see the players rp a little more than "let's loot the room, give me my gold, thanks."

NOTE: I do not use XP.

My situation is similar to arguskos He just sits around while the others get a bunch of extra time

I also rarely use XP

ocato
2008-11-19, 10:02 PM
Well, your options seem to be to beat him to death or get over it.

elliott20
2008-11-19, 10:05 PM
here's the bottom line: you can't FORCE anyone to roleplay if they don't want to. The best you can do is encourage it. Some systems encourage more than others. D&D, beyond alignment (which it's application is debatable as well), is not one of those systems that really encourages the roleplaying beyond what is there in combat.

The problem here stems from several things:

1. player personality: some players aren't here to do their own production of shakespeare. They just want to go and hack up some monsters, count their loot and call it a day. That's fine. And in that case, you really shouldn't force them to as long as they are not disrupting the other player's fun. If that is the issue, and that's all they want to do, stop here and just move on with your game.

2. lack of involvement: they just don't have enough to sink their teeth into. this is where you need to help them. D&D is one of those games where the GM controls 99% of the environment, which in between running the rules, the monsters, etc, etc, etc, it can leave the PC's involvement in the world high and dry. Your players need to be vested in the world in some fashion. so, here's a suggestion. Tell them to write some connections to other NPCs, groups, etc. Tell them to write out HOW they are connected to them. Even allow them a bit of leeway if you must. this is how they become vested in the world. Born enemy? lovers? brothers? what?

note: do not make this connection someone who is a constant victim and therefore a consistent weakness to the PC. You want a connection, not an adventuring ball n' chain.

3. lack of drama: players need to have other sources of drama and intrigue beyond the over-arching plot. They need their own personal sources of conflict. Ask your players to write down 3. Use the relationships to help aid this process. Avenge a father? destroy an organization? ascend to a certain rank? what? what is their personal drama? this is the kind of thing that makes a character come alive and act on his/her own behalf. It's okay to let the players metagame this portion as you want to make sure whatever the player writes down, it's not just important to his character, it's also important to HIM personally. Again, vested interest.

now here's the thing: all of this is hinged around one important requirement: they need to want to play this. So, before you enforce this on them, talk to them and how they feel about adding more roleplaying and more drama into the game. If they're not interested in it, doing this will just annoy them. So, talk to them first.

VerdugoExplode
2008-11-19, 10:09 PM
If they're happy don't worry about it. D&D is about having fun and if they aren't having a negative impact on the game then there's not much you can do. You can try to award the people that do RP with gold, items or xp. Make a situation in which whoever is doing the most rp wise receives a reward. This might backfire horribly as some people play D&D solely for the number crunching and camaraderie and will notice that they are being punished, or at least rewarded less, and may start acting in a way that negatively impacts the party on the grounds that they are roleplaying.

In short, if everyone's having fun high fives all around and don't worry. If they aren't than you can only hope that the reward system will fix it.

Doom Cellist
2008-11-19, 10:13 PM
Ok thanks for the advice

arguskos
2008-11-19, 10:15 PM
If they're happy don't worry about it. D&D is about having fun and if they aren't having a negative impact on the game then there's not much you can do. You can try to award the people that do RP with gold, items or xp. Make a situation in which whoever is doing the most rp wise receives a reward. This might backfire horribly as some people play D&D solely for the number crunching and camaraderie and will notice that they are being punished, or at least rewarded less, and may start acting in a way that negatively impacts the party on the grounds that they are roleplaying.

In short, if everyone's having fun high fives all around and don't worry. If they aren't than you can only hope that the reward system will fix it.
See, in my case, my player SAYS they are having fun, but all outward appearances show that they are bored silly. I mean, they do HOMEWORK during session sometimes!! I've asked them not to, and they stop, but then they are even more bored. I've tried talking to them out of session, and in session, and get the same responses each time. I'm at a loss. I'd like them to stay, since we're friends, but I don't know what to do at this point. :smallfrown:

Doom Cellist
2008-11-19, 10:18 PM
Hmmm.. well arguskos could you tell me who the characters are and the setting plot ect. to see if I can see a problem

Biffoniacus_Furiou
2008-11-19, 10:20 PM
There are some people who will take an interest in D&D and gain an encyclopedic knowledge of the game without being able to relate to their own or others' characters (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger%27s). Just like someone who can't read wouldn't be able to learn the rules on their own, someone who can't relate to others won't be able to learn how to RP effectively or at all. If they know the rules and mechanics of the game, and have fun at playing the game rather than role-playing the game, then it's probably a good idea to just let them play the way they enjoy it. Don't put them on the spot or punish them for doing what they're naturally good at and avoiding what they're incapable of or uncomfortable doing.

elliott20
2008-11-19, 10:26 PM
like I said, if you want them to roleplay, you can't just say, "hey guys, how about some roleplaying here? I'll give out some XP for it." and call it a day.

roleplaying, especially good roleplaying, needs catalysts to make it work. And your players have to WANT to do it. This is why I suggested you let the players write themselves into the setting somehow. Before you do it, talk to your players and tell them about the idea, and why you're doing this. If they seem okay with it, run with it and see where it goes. If not, well, just let them be and try to enjoy yourself.

arguskos
2008-11-19, 10:30 PM
Urrr... not sure how that will help, actually, but fine.

Party composition (level 4, mind you):
Human Dread Necromancer - he really is a spontaneous player, sorta mad-scientist style. Fun guy, fun character, lacks all common sense though, causes some issues sometimes. Decent RP anyways.

Orog (orc) Barbarian - HILARIOUS character. Khrush (not kidding) is a "smash first, throw second, stomp third, ask questions last" sorta character. RP'd very well. Is considering drifting towards the good side of things, and maybe going exalted.

Elven Vow of Poverty Monk - really great rp'er, actually. He recently adopted a kobold child after the party obliterated their tribe (they were assaulting and harassing caravans and towns, and the party was hired to remove them). Now, he serves as the kobold's parent. Really cool character, fun times.

Illithid Savant (homebrew, both of them, don't worry about it) - this is the trouble character. The player (my girlfriend, who I introduced to D&D sometime ago) says she doesn't have fun doing anything other than combat (which I was then told takes too long and is boring :smallconfused:). The character is a merchant who just does stuff for no reason (really, I asked for some character motivation at some point... I got a bemused stare and a shrug from that player. Some prodding produced "they like money, thus I adventure").

I'm just confused, since I know so little about this character. The player almost never speaks in game, and just goes about their combat routine. I have no idea why she likes the game (though I've been assured multiple times she does). I'm happy to let it lie at this point really, though it still confuses me.


There are some people who will take an interest in D&D and gain an encyclopedic knowledge of the game without being able to relate to their own or others' characters (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger%27s). Just like someone who can't read wouldn't be able to learn the rules on their own, someone who can't relate to others won't be able to learn how to RP effectively or at all. If they know the rules and mechanics of the game, and have fun at playing the game rather than role-playing the game, then it's probably a good idea to just let them play the way they enjoy it. Don't put them on the spot or punish them for doing what they're naturally good at and avoiding what they're incapable of or uncomfortable doing.
At this point, that's what I'm doing, though they don't SEEM to enjoy it, and always get upset when I inquire, so I am very confused. :smallconfused:

Hal
2008-11-19, 10:34 PM
Do these players ever interact with NPCs? You have an easy tool for drawing them in by having the NPCs address someone besides the "party face." All that NPC needs is a reason to talk to the quiet ones more than the face. For example, if you walk into the Fighters' Guild Hall, they'll want to chat up your "strong silent Barbarian" (or whatever they are) more than the chatty Kathy Bard.

Sereg
2008-11-19, 10:36 PM
There are some people who will take an interest in D&D and gain an encyclopedic knowledge of the game without being able to relate to their own or others' characters (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger%27s). Just like someone who can't read wouldn't be able to learn the rules on their own, someone who can't relate to others won't be able to learn how to RP effectively or at all. If they know the rules and mechanics of the game, and have fun at playing the game rather than role-playing the game, then it's probably a good idea to just let them play the way they enjoy it. Don't put them on the spot or punish them for doing what they're naturally good at and avoiding what they're incapable of or uncomfortable doing.

Well as an aspie myself, I find roleplaying to be a fun challenge.

elliott20
2008-11-19, 10:37 PM
well, argusko, RPing, despite what many think, is not a one person activity. Spending your time talking in funny old English is not necessarily roleplaying. Roleplaying, in most context takes two. That is, the player and the GM. That's right, you need to give them stimuli to run with.

Next time, have stuff happen to her outside of combat. i.e. a merchant guild who wants to extract payments from her lest she be targeted by the merchant guild and ostracized from doing business in any place that has guild connections.

Have people come to her (knowing her rep as a merchant) asking for things. Things that she doesn't have and that if she wants the reward for, she must go find them. have those things be illegal but don't let her know that until it's too late. Instant drama.

arguskos
2008-11-19, 10:41 PM
I run a fairly sandbox game, so they talk to NPC's as much as they choose to. So far, it's been a pretty simple game (we're only 2 sessions in, and session 1 had a near TPK... inflicted on the party BY the party... don't ask), since they've been more about seeing what these characters can do than about dealing with the plot.

There are some opportunities for rp'ing with that character coming up soon though (her character's boss is in trouble, and they are off to save him). Maybe that'll help.


well, argusko, RPing, despite what many think, is not a one person activity. Spending your time talking in funny old English is not necessarily roleplaying. Roleplaying, in most context takes two. That is, the player and the GM. That's right, you need to give them stimuli to run with.

Next time, have stuff happen to her outside of combat. i.e. a merchant guild who wants to extract payments from her lest she be targeted by the merchant guild and ostracized from doing business in any place that has guild connections.

Have people come to her (knowing her rep as a merchant) asking for things. Things that she doesn't have and that if she wants the reward for, she must go find them. have those things be illegal but don't let her know that until it's too late. Instant drama.
I know this. Thing is, I DO provide the stimulus. Hell, once they dug up a grave, and found a plot-giving NPC (which they then accidentally killed, he was a deathless, the dread necro used charnel touch, he was already injured...). I go out of my way to create interesting, flavorful NPC's for them to interact with. I don't really target players with the NPC's, maybe that's where I'm going wrong.

I haven't been playing with the merchant aspect though... I should try that. Thanks for the tip. :smallsmile:

Weiser_Cain
2008-11-19, 10:42 PM
Look some people care about their post count and some people are content to lurk for years without ever signing up.
I say let the sit and have your fun with the one willing.

arguskos
2008-11-19, 10:45 PM
Guess I should just do that then. I'll give a few more shots, see if I can get the player to give it a try, and if not, then just let it lie. To each their own I guess! :smallsmile:

Thanks for the advice folks. Sorry to jack your thread for a bit there, Doom Cellist.

Raum
2008-11-19, 10:57 PM
Alright so I've got three players. One is an excellent role player, One play's the same person over and over. The third always plays the "Strong silent type" So he doesn't have to make a personality. I've tried many things ,threatening, blackmail, everything what do you suggest I do.It's often as easy as asking in character questions. Preferably in a way (or time) when he can't easily let others answer for him. But always ask questions...

Purely GM to Player you'll also want to ask what facets of the game he finds the most fun. He may simply prefer not to role play. As heretical as it sounds, it happens. :)

Raum
2008-11-19, 11:07 PM
See, in my case, my player SAYS they are having fun, but all outward appearances show that they are bored silly. I mean, they do HOMEWORK during session sometimes!! I've asked them not to, and they stop, but then they are even more bored. I've tried talking to them out of session, and in session, and get the same responses each time. I'm at a loss. I'd like them to stay, since we're friends, but I don't know what to do at this point. :smallfrown:You may simply be asking too general a question. Instead of asking "Did you have fun?" Try more detailed questions..."How was the game's pace?" "The RP to combat ratio?" "Do you find the plot interesting, confusing, or are you still looking for the plot?" Etc. You know your players better than I, try to ask questions in a way they can give you a specific answer without feeling like a bad answer will hurt your feelings. Tell them you're glad they're having fun but you're trying to find the one aspect of the game which "could be better."


The player (my girlfriend, who I introduced to D&D sometime ago) says she doesn't have fun doing anything other than combat (which I was then told takes too long and is boring :smallconfused:). The character is a merchant who just does stuff for no reason (really, I asked for some character motivation at some point... I got a bemused stare and a shrug from that player. Some prodding produced "they like money, thus I adventure").In general terms, try to relate something she likes out of the game to her character...preferably in an open ended way.

Whatever else you do, ask in character questions! :)

arguskos
2008-11-19, 11:09 PM
You may simply be asking too general a question. Instead of asking "Did you have fun?" Try more detailed questions..."How was the game's pace?" "The RP to combat ratio?" "Do you find the plot interesting, confusing, or are you still looking for the plot?" Etc. You know your players better than I, try to ask questions in a way they can give you a specific answer without feeling like a bad answer will hurt your feelings. Tell them you're glad they're having fun but you're trying to find the one aspect of the game which "could be better."

In general terms, try to relate something she likes out of the game to her character...preferably in an open ended way.

Whatever else you do, ask in character questions! :)
Hmm... other good suggestions. Thanks Raum. I'll give those a try.

afroakuma
2008-11-19, 11:14 PM
Guess I should just do that then. I'll give a few more shots, see if I can get the player to give it a try, and if not, then just let it lie. To each their own I guess! :smallsmile:

Thanks for the advice folks. Sorry to jack your thread for a bit there, Doom Cellist.

Well, of course, firstly you gave your girlfriend a tentacle face. If she ever decides to eat your brain, it is now officially your fault.

Secondly, it is your girlfriend, after all. She may be trying to be supportive. It may not be panning out.

arguskos
2008-11-19, 11:16 PM
Yeah, well, she made some really beautiful art for the illithids and dragonkin in my homebrew setting, so I felt she should get to play the first one that was ever a PC.

Also, yeah, that may be true. We've been playing D&D off and on for nearly a year though... so iunno about that. *shrug* Whatever she wants to do is great, I just want to help encourage RP in case she decides she wants to go that route (damn strong-willed she is! :smallamused:).

valadil
2008-11-20, 12:10 AM
Not everybody wants to roleplay. Some of the time they don't know what it is, but some people have tried it, decided RP isn't for them, and gone back to hack 'n slash. Don't fight it.

However there are also players who simply haven't come out of their shells yet. What I recommend for them is giving them personalized plot just for their character. Take something from their past or something they find exciting and focus the game on that. If that doesn't get them involved I don't know what will.

Devils_Advocate
2008-11-20, 01:54 AM
General tip regarding lack of roleplaying or involvement: If it bothers you that a player is not participating in a game in the way you want them to, you may wish to consider the notion that the problem is not with the player. As a very general rule, all else being equal, you should be at least as willing and eager to go along with what others want as you are to try to get them to do what you want. That applies to life in general, not just gaming.


At this point, that's what I'm doing, though they don't SEEM to enjoy it, and always get upset when I inquire, so I am very confused. :smallconfused:
I have a crazy theory: She's being sincere.

You ask her if she's really having a good time. She tells you she is. Instead of simply accepting this, you follow up with repeated "You just don't seem all that interested in this; do you really like it?", etc.

It's annoying to be repeatedly asked a question that you've already answered, and also insulting to have someone insinuate that you're not being honest about your feelings. That can make a person aggravated and/or defensive.

It's possible to casually enjoy an activity without bein' all "WOO! ENTERTAINMENT! YAY!" It can be relaxing to have a hobby that you don't have a whole ton of emotional investment in. Maybe she likes having a nice little game that she can even multitask homework with if she wants. Maybe she likes having something that isn't ZOMG SERIOUS BUSINESS that absolutely demands a bunch of time and energy or it's not even worth bothering with.

Just a thought.

Talic
2008-11-20, 02:05 AM
It's further possible that the activity doesn't even matter to her.

Perhaps she doesn't care if it's D&D, or pool, or a trip to the movies.

Perhaps it's more about spending time with someone she's dating. And, if she's not terribly interested in the game, perhaps she gets her enjoyment from the company, rather than the activity.

I know I've dated women who thought the sight of me "geeking out" playing D&D was absolutely adorable.

I didn't complain, adorable's a good thing, and any passing embarassment was more than made up for later.

Fiendish_Dire_Moose
2008-11-20, 02:33 AM
YOU CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER, BUT YOU CANNOT MAKE IT DRINK!

Seriously. Either bribe them with benefits and hope it helps, or give up on it. People won't role play if they do not want to or have any desire to do it. Some people are actors, some people are football players, and some people are guitarists. You cannot force someone to be all three.

Khanderas
2008-11-20, 02:39 AM
My own unqualified self thinks (puts on psychologist beard and glasses):
Two reasons why this could be,
one, the subject does not infact come to the playsessions to act out a part, he is merely there to enjoy the company and perhaps story that others provide, much like a movie where his "job" is to enjoy the social aspect with his friends.
two, he is too shy to act out, and settles for second best, wich is to let his (in his mind) far better players take front stage.

Mind I also include "just there for the numbers" in type one simply because he IS unintrested in this RP aspect if he is there to "win" and collect XP / gold.

In either case, I think one good way would be to "force" him to state something about his character. I read somewhere a guide on making intresting characters, name or place eludes me, that the character should have
* 2-3 things he always will "always" do (kill something evil when it is within swordrange, help those in need, kick puppies)
* 2-3 things he will never do (betray his king, eat meat, murder for money... oh wait thats adventuring, umm... backstab someone)
* Reason for adventuring (kobolds ate his family, war ended and he started being a sword for hire since that was all he knew, listen to too many bard stories and now try to be one of those heroes, religious calling)

Then when you have those stated out on a paper... then you got plothooks and perhaps even twists that "force" him to act out... Perhaps he likes it once he tasted it, perhaps not.

But say he is an escaped slave from the gladiator rings, escaped one day and is a sword for hire since he knows how to do nothing else (not an uncommon archetype I would guess after Conan and Gladiator). Is hired by a group by a random adventurergroup (the other PC's) for a share of the loot. The others are not escaped slaves and can possibly take on a job shipping newly captured slaves... how would your guy react... (hopefully with trying to convince the others to set the slaves free, to prevent in party fighting make the slavers real sleezebags who possibly may plan to sell the PC's once they are done with the job).

Since you already blackmailed, begged and tried to force the guy to RP, tricking is the only thing I can think of that is left :)

Serpentine
2008-11-20, 02:53 AM
With lack of roleplaying enthusiasm, it could just, perhaps, be that they don't have a real grasp on the character themselves... In my game, we have a rough-and-ready shortcut to character development: Fears and fetishes. Every character needs something they're afraid of - from "ick" through abstract dread to full-blown phobia - and something they have a "thing" for - from a liking through adoration to... well, you get the idea. Some examples include undead, failure, harm to someone else through one's own inadequacy, heights, enclosed spaces, boredom, the hells, etc. as fears, and elves, truth, the colour blue, shiny things, nymphs, attention, toads (don't ask :smallconfused:), jewellery, cats, etc. as fetishes. It's a good place to start to turn your sheet of paper with numbers on into a real person, and something you can have a lot of fun with.
^ seems along these lines, too.

arguskos
2008-11-20, 03:51 AM
Yelling and stuff
Ok, ok, I get it, I'm doing it wrong. :smallsigh: I'll just let it go and trust my players, her in particular to do what makes them happy.

Totally Guy
2008-11-20, 05:16 AM
Here's what I do. Keep offering the "Hero's Choice" dilemma over and over. Make them debate over what is the right thing to do.

After finding a magic item that can cure a sick ally reveal that it could be used instead to painlessly defeat a lesser villain.

When they decide to heal the ally reveal that their doctor also wants the item to lift a curse the party has seen elsewhere instead and that he has a "not as good cure" prepared.

"Besides," the doctor says, "if you cure him now with this he'll know you had the opportunity to defeat his enemy once and for all and you let it go. And for that he'll hate you. Give me the cure and I'll heal him my way and he'll never have to know what you gave up. In this case he will be grateful."

Weiser_Cain
2008-11-20, 06:01 AM
"Which one give more xp?"
I cast: Magic Missile at the sickness.

sleepy
2008-11-20, 08:11 AM
@ arguscos: you don't use XP, so I'm assuming you just inform your players when it's time to level up?

Why does this stop you handing out small character sheet bonuses?
--"Great job with that social encounter, it really taught your character a lot about negotiation. Here's 2 skill points. Spend them on Bluff, Sense Motive, Diplomacy, or Intimidate."
--"I like how you described searching for footprints back in the woods there, it seems like your character's getting the hang of that. Tell you what, from now on, you count as having the Track feat."

I actually think small bumps that don't focus on combat like this are cooler than a couple hundred XP's. They take effect always, not just when I want to craft or am within a narrow range of a level breakpoint, they don't cause brief level disparity in the party, and they usually give me access to something I wouldn't normally invest in. Spells known/added to spellbook, a weapon proficiency, or even a fluff class feature from another class (poison use?) can all make nice treats that reward a player without having much effect on balance.

Triaxx
2008-11-20, 10:12 AM
Give up something that's specific to her character. A group of telepaths that only can communicate with her.

Situations that anyone can handle are much less fun than one that everyone can contribute too, but only one person can deal with directly. Such as the Rogue being the go-between with the local theives guild.

I personally am light on story, because I live for the action of combat. My characters tend to be elves and have the contribution of a really, really, really good spot check. And that's about the sum total of their RP value. The fact that they tend to fly into the air and rain down fireballs in combat, means they are still valuable party members, they just don't feel the urge to get involved. Bad RPing? No, just consistent.

PurinaDragonCho
2008-11-20, 10:37 AM
Alright so I've got three players. One is an excellent role player, One play's the same person over and over. The third always plays the "Strong silent type" So he doesn't have to make a personality. I've tried many things ,threatening, blackmail, everything what do you suggest I do.

This may not answer the question you asked, but...

There is a balance for each player as to how much role playing he or she wants to do. For example, I had a low level wizard in one game, and I wanted to buy a potion of cure light wounds. The DM made me role play out going to several temples and talking to priests there. I spent about 20 minutes of game time trying to get on potion of CLW. Now, I think that's ridiculous. My character was good aligned, and talking to priests at temples of good deities. If somebody in this picture was evil, I could see it.

Maybe you've tried this, but try to figure out what your players want out of the game. If you let them know that they can get that - if they get the right information from an NPC - they might be more willing to talk to that NPC.

And my personal opinion - it's fine to say "I want to ask him where the Temple is," rather than actually saying something like, "Well met, noble priest. We seek the lost tomb of Blahblah. Canst thou aid us in our quest?" Too much of that latter stuff just feels kind of silly to me.

Curmudgeon
2008-11-20, 11:35 AM
Generally the best motivation is to introduce situations that play to the character's non-combat characteristics. This is supposed to be a merchant, right? So introduce opportunities for finding new trade goods, haggle about prices, make decisions between different types of commerce (after all, money is always limited; she can't pursue every trade venture), and the like.

You can also create situations that are just random interactions, such as some beggar child who decides to tag along and ask the character for handouts.

LibraryOgre
2008-11-20, 11:41 AM
Many moons ago, we had a scad of new players in our game, so the DM decided that everyone was getting pregenerated characters, more or less at random. He wrote up a short history that interlocked with at least one other player, and a personality for each of them that would play off another player's.

He also included some suggested quotes. The barbarian, for example, knew the ranger, but really, really disliked the mage. So, the barbarian had some suggested quotes like "You sorcerous dog!", "By the ancestors!", and the like.

For a person who genuinely doesn't know how to roleplay, this would be a good solution.

sleepy
2008-11-20, 12:06 PM
For example, I had a low level wizard in one game, and I wanted to buy a potion of cure light wounds. The DM made me role play out going to several temples and talking to priests there. I spent about 20 minutes of game time trying to get on potion of CLW. Now, I think that's ridiculous.

Was that the first time you tried to buy a potion? Did you try it much after that? Kinda sounds like your DM discouraging you from trivializing a magic item by stocking up out of character on every trip to town. He can't reasonably make something like a healing potion randomly unavailable in a Good temple, but he can make sure you don't assume you can cruise out with a belt pouch full after every rest by giving the process of getting them some gravity. Despite any leftover sour feelings it might inspire, I doubt you can deny your decision to drink that potion was not undertaken lightly.

Reluctance
2008-11-20, 12:42 PM
Why is nobody asking the obvious question? What does she like? Not just spending time with you. Not "D&D" (which is most likely really just a way to spend time with you). You mentioned that she likes being an artist. Does she like generic high fantasy tropes? Nature stuff? Cultural exploration? You may not be able to pull her all the way out of her shell, but you can at least tailor encounters to keep her interest.

You also mention that the other three players are, in your words "good roleplayers". How much of this involves them being proactive and ... well, noisy? Most people are socialized to take turns talking. At a gaming table, you can often need to elbow your way in if you want to say something. It might just be that she doesn't usually find openings to contribute. You probably don't want to throw her into the deep end too quickly, but throw her a couple of bones. A few one-on-one sessions, throwing in the occasional strategy meeting (where you as DM-ringleader should make sure everybody has a chance to contribute something), or suchlike should at least give her more reason to get into the skin of her character. And if she seems completely unenthused in even the one-on-one deals? She's just gaming to spend time with you. Deal with it. Give her a character she can more comfortably fade into the background with, and make sure to be extra attentive boyfriend guy during breaks.

Quincunx
2008-11-21, 03:36 AM
Run the phrase "gaming voyeur" by her. A lady introduced it to this board about two years ago as her description--someone who enjoyed hanging out with the group and listening to their exploits but had no desire to join in herself. She was a willing spectator. Point is, there's more than one of this type out there but usually not more than one per group.

Devils_Advocate
2008-11-21, 01:35 PM
Here's what I do. Keep offering the "Hero's Choice" dilemma over and over. Make them debate over what is the right thing to do.
That sounds awfully contrived. If you kept presenting scenarios like the one you mentioned, I think my character might decide to begin a quest to figure out why the gods keep testing him and his friends.

"My character searches for a third option (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TakeAThirdOption). Aw, I only rolled a 6..."