Flame of Anor
2008-11-22, 05:45 PM
WEEKLY OOTS NEWS
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Miko and Elvis: Their Secret Baby!!!
Dead? Not quite! Miko Miyazaki, bitchy former paladin, and Elvis Presley, the King of rock-n-roll, have only now been revealed by our secret reporters to have been hiding out on a secret Pacific island for the last several decades! What's more, they have a secret baby! Due to the stars' gravitational effect on the magnetic alignment of their genetic hormones, this baby, Uglybumpin' Kinglet Preslazaki, has strange abilities, such as the ability to fly! "It's absolutely true--little Uglybumpin' is so good at flying we have to tie his ankle to the leg of the table to keep him down. Now go away before I smite you," said Ms. Miyazaki to a reporter. The baby's nanny, Amelia Earhart, has even more shocking news: "Little Master Uglybumpin' used to be a Satanist. He would draw little pentagrams in crayons and sacrifice mice. It was so cute! He was even starting to get Satanic powers, like breathing fire and stuff. But lately his mother found out and told him that from then on, she would poke him every day and Smite Evil, so he'd better be good, or at least neutral." Are we to take from this that Ms. Miyazaki is delusionally claiming to still be a paladin? Well, why the heck not?
_________________________________
Miko and Elvis: Their Secret Baby!!!
Dead? Not quite! Miko Miyazaki, bitchy former paladin, and Elvis Presley, the King of rock-n-roll, have only now been revealed by our secret reporters to have been hiding out on a secret Pacific island for the last several decades! What's more, they have a secret baby! Due to the stars' gravitational effect on the magnetic alignment of their genetic hormones, this baby, Uglybumpin' Kinglet Preslazaki, has strange abilities, such as the ability to fly! "It's absolutely true--little Uglybumpin' is so good at flying we have to tie his ankle to the leg of the table to keep him down. Now go away before I smite you," said Ms. Miyazaki to a reporter. The baby's nanny, Amelia Earhart, has even more shocking news: "Little Master Uglybumpin' used to be a Satanist. He would draw little pentagrams in crayons and sacrifice mice. It was so cute! He was even starting to get Satanic powers, like breathing fire and stuff. But lately his mother found out and told him that from then on, she would poke him every day and Smite Evil, so he'd better be good, or at least neutral." Are we to take from this that Ms. Miyazaki is delusionally claiming to still be a paladin? Well, why the heck not?