[3.x/PF] GitP Regulars as Spells!

[Zaydos]

This is a terrible dental plan. For the copay of your immortal soul, you get your teeth to be clean for 1 day. After that, they are bad again.

It's a focus, you can keep it and cast it every day. Though it should be straightened, cleaned, and cavity free.

Also

Keledrath's Unhallowed Pact
Evocation [Evil, Lawful]
Level: Sor/Wiz 3
Components: V, S, M, Special
Casting Time: 10 minutes.
Range: Personal.
Target: You.
Duration: 1 week.

You call upon diabolic powers, communicating your desire with a harvester devil or imp through this spell. When you complete it a contract for your soul appears in your hand, your copy, and you gain Fast Healing equal to 1/2 your caster level, an enhancement bonus to each physical ability score equal to 2 + 1/2 your caster level, an enhancement bonus to natural armor equal to 1/2 your caster level, and Spell Resistance 12 + your caster level for the duration.

Material: 1 ounce of blood.

Special: As part of casting this spell you sell your soul, and your copy of the contract appears in your hand. You may not cast this spell if you do not have a soul to sell, or have already sold your soul.