That picture is amazing but I can't think of a witty remark ;_;

Quote Originally Posted by Geoffrey Fourmyle
Geoffrey Fourmyle

Spoiler: backstory

Fourmyle turned the gilt invitation over in his hand. He’d tried to warn that d’Orien brat. He supposed there was just no helping some people.

He penned a response posthaste and pressed his signet ring over hot wax. A courier from Sivis was along and got it where it needed to go soon enough. Fourmyle certainly paid enough for the privilege.

It wasn’t long before he got off a plush car on the lightning rail and arrived at his destination. A garish loom hung out in place of a sign. The dream weaver. This was where he’d been invited to celebrate that wretched scion’s birth. One had to keep up appearances, after all.

Servants showed him inside and took his coat. Fourmyle had dabbled in places like this, but could never quite bring himself to enjoy it the way it had been intended.

“Hey, there you are! Glad you could make it, little Geoffrey!” crowed the birthday boy over a glass of something expensive. He snapped his clumsy fingers and asked why no one had poured his guest a drink yet.

“You ever been here before?” d’Orien asked.

Fourmyle tried not to smile. “Once or twice.”

d’Orien chuckled. “Okay, I’ll try and take it easy on you in there. But I ain’t making any promises.”

“Perish the thought,” Fourmyle said.

The two allowed themselves to be led into a solemn, white chamber alongside the other guests. They were laid in featureless reclining chairs, pure white cloth draped over their faces and hands.

But this was no barber’s hot towel. On the contrary, this was a preamble to being divested of one’s senses entirely and being opened up to something else.

Fourmyle half-listened to the attendant explaining the rules of the game. Something about moving the flag from point A to point B, capturing the enemy’s base, and so on. He was reminded to feel free to enjoy himself and that nothing that happened while his party was under the folie a dix that was their shared forced dream would have any effect when they all woke up again.

Fourmyle closed his eyes and got to his feet in boots that weren’t his own. He was dressed in quiet silks with an impractical but very comfortable hood that would’ve made eating or breathing quite impossible on the outside.

d’Orien stood at the other side of the battlefield, wearing the shape of some hulking brute. No comment from Fourmyle, though the other guests sniped amongst themselves that he was overcompensating.

“Whoa, it’s Fourmyle! I thought you were just along for dinner. I heard Kalashtar didn’t dream,” said one of the guests from an orc’s mouth.

Another elbowed him in the ribs with a warforged elbow. “Don’t be common. Sorry, Geoffrey, I can’t take my husband anywhere.”

“Don’t trouble yourself,” Fourmyle said, his voice unmuffled through his thick cloak and scarf. “The normal rules don’t apply in here, after all.”

The alarm went off letting them know the game had started. d’Orien had tried jumping the gun, so was struck with a ten yard penalty. Fourmyle stepped straight down, as if through fog, and found himself under ground, as he knew he would.

Unlike being buried alive back up above, there was nothing below the surface here. Once he was beneath the surface, he could see emptiness all round him and ran forward as though on black carpet. He knew he was on borrowed time, of course. The telepath running the game was bound to find him sooner or later and boot him back where he belonged, but not before he got to where he needed to be.

The heel of d’Orien’s heavy boot clomped overhead. Fourmyle made a great motion of his arms, as though swimming through the ocean and found himself back on solid ground again.

d’Orien had the flags of both teams clutched in his crude fist, the corpses of a couple of his friends dangling from his tusks.

“Warned you I wasn’t taking it easy in here, man,” he said, his voice clear as a bell despite the circumstances.

“I’d expect nothing less.” Fourmyle pressed his back to a boulder as d’Orien lumbered toward him.

“Just a game. Don’t worry, I’ll do you quick. Resurrection still stings in here, though.” d’Orien picked a bit of armor from his teeth.

One of Fourmyle’s team shouted and charged in from the field. He broke a sword against d’Orien’s flank. It lodged in his thick hide, but still caused him to turn his head. That was all Fourmyle needed.

He ducked in an exaggerated fashion and before he finished redistributing his weight, launched himself upwards with all his strength.

Outside, this would do nothing more than make Fourmyle fall on his face. But nothing was the same here. As the telepath parsed the opposing commands, there was a narrow window where the fabric of things was thinner. All Fourmyle had to do was pierce it.

He jabbed his knife straight up in the air and sure enough his hand popped up just in front of d’Orien, catching him in the throat. He fell to his knees and choked out something Fourmyle had no trouble knowing was obscene. The alarm went off marking the end of the round. Point for Fourmyle’s team.

“Touche, chum. Oh, and happy birthday.”

Spoiler: stub

LE kalashtar cobra strike monk 2/warblade 3/psionic assassin 1/elocator 10/jaunter 4

Spoiler: abilities

str 12
dex 16
con 14
int 16 (increases here)
wis 10
cha 8

Spoiler: build table
Level Class Base Attack Bonus Fort Save Ref Save Will Save Skills Feats Class Features
1st Cobra Strike Monk 1 +0 +2 +2 +2 balance 4, concentration 4, disguise 4 (2), hide 4, jump 4, ms 4, tumble 4 darkstalker Bonus feat (dodge), flurry of blows, unarmed strike
2nd Cobra Strike Monk 2 +1 +3 +3 +3 balance 1 (5), concentration 1 (5), disguise 1 (2.5), hide 1 (5), jump 1 (5), ms 1 (5), tumble 1 (5) Bonus feat (mobility), invisible fist
3rd Warblade 1 +2 +5 +3 +3 concentration 1 (6), disguise 1 (3), hide 1 (5.5), jump 1 (6), ms 1 (5.5), tumble 1 (6) combat reflexes Battle clarity (Reflex saves), weapon aptitude
4th Warblade 2 +3 +6 +3 +3 concentration 1 (7), disguise 1 (3.5), hide 3 (7), ms 2 (6.5) Uncanny dodge
5th Warblade 3 +4 +6 +4 +4 concentration 1 (8), disguise 1 (4), hide 2 (8), ms 3 (8) Battle ardor (critical confirmation)
6th Psionic Assassin 1 +4 +6 +6 +4 upd 4 spring attack Sneak attack +1d6, death attack, poison use, powers
7th Elocator 1 +4 +6 +8 +6 autohypnosis 5, upd 4 (8) Scorn earth, Sidestep Charge
8th Elocator 2 +5 +6 +9 +7 hide 3 (11), ms 3 (11), tumble 1 (7), upd 3 (11) Opportunistic strike +2
9th Elocator 3 +6/+1 +7 +9 +7 hide 1 (12), ms 1 (12), spot 6, tumble 1 (8), upd 1 (12) carmendine monk Dimension step
10th Elocator 4 +7/+2 +7 +10 +8 hide 1 (13), ms 1 (13), spot 6 (12), tumble 1 (9), upd 1 (13) Flanker
11th Elocator 5 +7/+2 +7 +10 +8 hide 1 (14), listen 4, ms 1 (14), spot 2 (14), tumble 1 (10), upd 1 (14) Opportunistic strike +4
12th Elocator 6 +8/+3 +8 +11 +9 hide 1 (15), listen 5 (9), ms 1 (14), spot 1 (15), tumble 1 (11), upd 1 (15) spectral skirmisher Transporter
13th Elocator 7 +9/+4 +8 +11 +9 hide 1 (16), listen 5 (14) ms 1 (15), spot 1 (16), tumble 1 (12), upd 1 (16) Capricious step
14th Elocator 8 +10/+5 +8 +12 +10 hide 1 (17), listen 3 (17) ms 1 (17), spot 1 (17), k: planes 1 (0.5), upd 1 (17) Opportunistic strike +6
15th Elocator 9 +10/+5 +9 +12 +10 hide 1 (18), listen 1 (18), ms 1 (18), spot 1 (18) k:planes 1 (1), upd 1 evasive reflexes Dimension spring attack
16th Elocator 10 +11/+6/+1 +9 +13 +11 hide 1 (19), k: planes 6 (4), listen 1 (19), ms 1 (19), spot 1 (19), upd 1 (19) Accelerated action
17th Jaunter 1 +11/+6/+1 +9 +15 +11 hide 1 (20), listen 1 (20), ms 1 (20), spot 1 (20), tumble 5 (17), upd 1 (20) Travel power, benign transposition
18th Jaunter 2 +12/+7/+2 +10 +16 +12 balance 1 (6), hide 1 (21), listen 1 (21), ms 1 (21), spot 1 (21), tumble 4 (21), up 1 (20) shi’quos school Baleful transposition, fast movement
19th Jaunter 3 +13/+8/+3 +10 +16 +12 balance 4 (10), hide 1 (22), listen 1 (22), ms 1 (22), spot 1 (22), tumble 1 (22), upd 1 (22) Dimension door, teleport
20th Jaunter 4 +14/+9/+4 +10 +17 +12 balance 4 (14), hide 1 (23) listen 1 (23), ms 1 (23), spot 1 (23), tumble 1 (23), upd 1 (23) Freedom of movement, plane shift

Spoiler: maneuvers known

three 1s:
leading the attack, douse the flames, steel wind
two 2s:
wall of blades, tactical strike

Spoiler: powers known

three 1s: chameleon, control light, dimensional pocket

three 2s:
cloud mind, constrictor’s touch, dream lock

two 3s:
greater concealing amorpha

Spoiler: playtips

Spoiler: lvl 5

Skulk around and get as many aoos off as you can. The tax, darkstalker, lets you sneak around monsters with special senses. Your maneuvers will add zing, and invisible fist helps with this a lot, allowing you to go invisible til the end of the round as an immediate. Cobra strike monk helps lay groundwork for elocator, paying most of the feat taxes, and carmendine monk helps out by consolidating your monk abilities under your intelligence, which also provides your psionic powers later on and gives a few bonuses from warblade.

Spoiler: lvl 10

Psionic assassin springboards you into the secret ingredient and there’s no looking back. Kalashtar gives you a thick slice of extra power points, so make sure you enjoy them, alongside its other goodies. Take advantage of your frequent invisibility with spectral skirmisher, which, among other goodies, grants aoos when enemies try to attack your square while you’re invisible. You’ve got powers now, so enjoy them, and psionic assassin provides upd, which elocator backs up in spades. Remember transparency’s the default rule, so enjoy using dorjes and wands to your heart’s content.

Spoiler: lvl 15

You’re nearly done with elocator, and most of your tricks have come together. Evasive reflexes lets you take a 5 foot step each time you would be entitled to an aoo, such as when people jab at you while you’re invisible under spectral skirmisher. Have fun not getting caught. Your capricious step ability, multiplying your effective number of 5 foot steps, makes this strategy much more powerful, offering a lot of flexibility and mobility on the battlefield. In tandem with elocator’s scorn earth ability, you aren’t found unless you want to be.

Spoiler: lvl 20

You’re out of elocator and dovetailing into something that merges beautifully with it: jaunter. It shares elocator’s affinity for a great deal of battlefield mobility alongside an emphasis on tactical field movement and teleportation. Supplementing your jaunter abilities to move your friends around with benign transposition, shunt your enemies with its baleful cousin, taking greater advantage of all elocator’s movement-themed goodies with your speed boost, extra uses of dimension door, a larger teleport pool, and access to another form of plane shift, jaunter even offers up the important freedom of movement, which elocator doesn’t have on its own.

While elocator’s other goodies are limited, so jaunter’s second bank offers up a deeper bench, new functionality is always welcome. Shi’quos school is online and allows you to knock enemies prone if you charge an enemy at a lower elevation than you, which is all the time. Thanks again, scorn earth. This lets you knock him prone and unlike many similar methods of achieving this goal, there’s no recourse for him to trip you back. With your levitation via scorn earth and bottomless invisibility, all this will let you flit around at will.

Spoiler: sources

core: monk, cobra strike monk, dodge, mobility, combat reflexes, elocator, spring attack
champions of valor: carmendine monk
exemplars of evil: invisible fist
player’s handbook II: spectral skirmisher
tome of battle: warblade, evasive reflexes
drow of the underdark: shi’quos school
lords of madness: darkstalker
expedition to the demonweb pits: jaunter
secrets of sarlona: psionic assassin