"I wish we could blame something halfway poetic or sensible like government greed on ours. No, it all started with this stupid demon lich, and his awful little pet talking cat. Demon does some stuff, gets his butt kicked while I'm off in my corner doing villain things, so I don't really know too much about what was going on then. Anyway, this leaves the cat here in the Nexus, stranded on his own. Cat gets really weepy and depressed and stupid, decides to end existence to put an end to human suffering. Well, not human, sapient beings, but whatever. He and this necromancer girl get together in an impenetrable magical glass fortress and decide to have a cursed apocalypse child to achieve that goal, because of course they do. That's just the thing you do when you're a bunch of suicidal idiots, I guess," Magtok shrugs, doing his level best to ignore the fungi and rodents, hovering off the ground to keep his distance and covered his mouth and nose with his hand when he passes near the worst of it. I wonder what it'd cost to hire an entire army of pest control specialists to march down here to their deaths? Fumigating the entire building probably isn't viable, but maybe we could do something with a whole lot of fire, if the air filtration systems aren't too damaged.
"So this gross baby child ushers in the Egyptian plagues. Water into blood. Frogs, lice, wild animals, a thunderstorm of hail and fire, locusts, and so on. It goes on for a while, with people screaming in fury from outside the Glass Citadel, myself included. Finally I bring the necromancer woman's niece to their doorstep, trying to make a point about what they're destroying. She's instantly struck dead by the monstrous demon child, via the death of the firstborn plague, and that's what finally convinces everyone to be rid of the apocalypse baby. I stew in guilt for my part in Melody's death, but the world is saved, life goes on. That's the first of the four apocalypse-level crises I got personally involved in. The last two weren't as eventful, but the second is a doozy. We-" Oh, a light. We should probably shut up for a little while, then. Y'know, make sure the coast is clear and there's no spooky monster waiting in the dark, listening in. The cyborg unslings his rifle again, cursing his miserable luck. You know, I bet Affidavit never had to go to war with his own house.