Originally Posted by
Vahnavoi
But beyond that, let me write you another satirical conversation:
GM: "In this world, dark elves are called Drow, they are an evil, subterranean, matriarchal spider-worshipping race."
Player: "That's so cool! I want to play a Drow!"
GM: "Nice! So let's start by rolling your abi-..."
Player: "But I don't want to be evil."
GM: "Okay? Well, that's workable..."
Player: "I also don't want to play any subterranean adventures. Those are so cliched."
GM: *Puzzled* "... well okay, you could be
part of an exploration party send to the surface..."
Player: "I also don't want to worship spiders."
GM: "... well they do have some other gods..."
Player: "Also, I find this matriarchy thing not to my tastes, so I'll play a lone male who has no ties to that social paradigm.
GM: *Looks at the player* "Okay, let's see if I got this right: I described an evil, subterranean, matriarchal spider-worshipping race..."
Player: "That's right!"
GM: "... but you want your character to not be evil, not live underground, not worship spiders and not have anything to do with their social order?"
Player: "Yes!"
GM: *crossing their arms* "... what, exactly, did you find cool about my Drow?"
Player: *points to a book* "Well, you see, they have dark skin in that picture."
GM: "And?"
Player: "And I find your game has too few dark skinned people in it."
GM: "Okay?"
Player: "So I thought I'd fix that by playing a Drow."
GM: "Uh..."
Player: "But I don't want to be part of an evil matriarchy. That'd give a bad impression of dark skinned people. So, instead, I will be lovable good ranger!"
GM: "You... you do realize my setting has actual dark skinned humans in it? Including an entire culture of immigrant from historical Egypt?"
Player: *puzzled* "Yes?"
GM: "So if you want a positive representation of dark skinned people, why not play, you know, a dark skinned human?"
Player: "... but they're not elves."
GM: "... I'm sorry?"
Player: "They're not elves. So they don't have pointed ears. Or this totally awesome bonus to dexterity. Playing a ranger is totally unoptimal without a bonus to dexterity."
GM: "Doesn't sound like you really want to play a Drow at all."
Player: "How come? I just said I wanted to play a Drow."
GM: "Would you be satisfied with playing an Egyptian with one-time boost to dexterity?"
Everyone else at the table: "Hey, wait a second! You didn't give us that option when we made our characters!"
GM: "... why's that a big deal all of a sudden?"
Player 2: "I totally wouldn't have picked orc and eaten an ability score penalty to mental stats if I could've just been a human with a bonus to strength.
GM: "But I thought you liked exploring orc culture and special disadvantages they have in society?"
Player 2: "Well sort of, but these penalties totally stink. I could've just picked a human and... I dunno, pretended I was still an orc?"
Player 3: "Refluffed."
Player 2: "Say what?"
Player 3: "Not 'pretended'. Refluffed. It's what you call it when you take a mechanic made to model one thing and use it for a completely different thing!"
GM: "Hold on... so you would've been fine playing... refluffed humans?"
Player 2: "Yes."
GM: "But then, what was the point of me creating all these special mechanics to model differences between orcs and humans?"
Player 2: "Eh, I don't play orcs for the mechanics, I play them to explore the culture, the psychology..."
GM: "But those mechanics are there to model the culture and the psychology! How are you supposed to explore being disadvantaged withouy actually having any disadvantage?"
Player 2: *sips juice through a straw* "Eh, I can just roleplay it."
Player 1: "So, can I play a Drow now?"