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  1. - Top - End - #1
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    Default Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Taverna Generica
    TAVERNA: Teh Acronym's Victoriously Extraordinary Realm of Nice Alcohol Yes, The is not normally included. Hence, "teh"
    or
    PUB: Place of Uberous Bavardage Credit for that to Blue Umbrella for that particular Acronym

    Reasoning for this thread: Townies complained that ACRONYM players and characters were intruding, destroying their plots, and generally making a nuisance of themselves. This thread (and perhaps others that may follow in its vain) are by no means trying to replace town, but are trying to offer ACRONYM players the chance to show their characters off in a non-ACRONYM base environment. In the same way, we are in no way saying that because this thread is here, it will stop ACRONYM players from using the Town. We also remind Townies that we are not saying you cannot post here. Yet, we dissuade you from doing so.

    Before you stands a stout, heavy building, constructed from dark, grey stones, with crossbeams latticing neatly across the foundation, up to the heavy wooden, and thatched, roof above. An inn sign hangs outside, eroded by age, the image undecipherable, the name withered: TAVERNA GENERICA.
    On the front door, someone, most likely eons ago, has inscribed the same words, and the words Townies, Keep Out! Someone has also hung a sign, offering ACRONYMers work in the bar, permanently.
    The tavern is in walking distance from any Acronym organisation. This, I stress most heavily, is not to be abused so you can run amok. It is so characters with no teleport capabilities can come to the inn. Yes, it makes no sense, considering that the organisations are miles apart, in some cases, even further. It just is.

    Inside, there is a large bar area, capable of seating at least one hundred people, with tables, big and heavy, and dark red leather chairs, aged yet comfy, littered about in a disorganised style. Old, oil paintings, of landscapes and battles, are hung randomly about the place, and a roaring fire constantly blazes to one side, nicely illuminating the baby grand piano. Behind the bar, an assortment of NPCs man the bar, all middle-aged, pot-bellied men, with bad body odour, and too much stubble. The occasional good-time girl (legal), and, recently, boy (legal) (working as a bar wench/manwench) also serves as a bar(wo)man at times. And, still further behind them, are the drinks, many hundreds of thousands of them, ranging from the mundane, to the mystic. From the bar, one can also buy typical bar foodstuffs, like pork scratchings, and dragon-flavoured nuts and kettle chips. One can also order proper food, in dizzying variety, from the kitchen. By the bar, a sign reads "No Wanton Telepathy, Please.". The only regular barmaid/hostess/front-of-house is Yasmin Lewis.
    Behind the bar is a large kitchen area, designed to cater for large functions, staffed by unnamed NPC slaves and servants. The technology in the kitchen has been imported from another dimension, there are incinerators, ovens, microwaves, and fridges, unlike the typical level of tech in this dimensional quadrant.

    Beneath the kitchen and bar area, accessible through a hidden staircase, lies the gigantic, mysterious wine cellar, filled with ancient drinks, and age-old graffiti, filled with dust, and the occasional pair (or more) making hot nookie beside the bottles, barrels, fine clarets, vintage burgundies, and other fine wines...
    Above the bar and kitchen, for three floors, lie rooms, varying in taste and decor, available as homes, and as places to stay the night. There are NPC cleaners who circulate among the rooms every few days or so, to clean up after the notoriously dirty out-of-dimension ACRONYMers.
    There's a small stables outside, where horses, ponies, and smaller mounts can be stored, and the NPC stableboys are perfectly capable of sending larger mounts and vehicles to other, larger, holding places off-site, when required to. There is an NPC heavy warhorse stored there, by the name of Cookie, created by Kaela, who can be rented for dramatic entrances, and the like.

    The only spells on the inn are ones that prevent alcohol from being watered down, and another that stops the entire inn being destroyed. Portals, and teleports, are perfectly allowed within, though frowned upon if they appear in places where they're not wanted.

    However, one of the semi-permanent residents of the place is the demigoddess Tessa Camlar. She is somewhat protective of the premises and tends to quickly repair any damage. (Kaelaroth is allowed to godmod her for this purpose.)

    IC Rules are as follows:
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    1. No listening to unhappy songs during happy hour!
    2. No killing the staff.
    3. No vandalism.
    4. No thieving!
    5. Not so much a rule, but we'd like to remind customers that we retain the right to refuse and kill customers, and no responsibility can be taken on our part if you're evicted, injured, or killed, by Taverna employees.
    Breaking of the rules may earn ACRONYMers banning from the tavern, or a fine. Or, in certain cases, other ACRONYMers, or NPC policemen and bounty hunters, may be employed to hunt down the nasty, nasty people who broked the rules.


    OOC Rules are as follows:
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    1. No controlling the NPCs to do anything that would be considered unlike them to do. You're permitted to make them serve your character(s) a drink, but no, let's say, make them get drunk and burn the place down. Of course, you could always make it clear your character is mind-controlling them into doing such as thing, for example, but you cannot make them do anything out of the ordinary, and make it seem as if they were doing it out of their own free will.
    2. No destroying the place. You're allowed to damage it, but destroying it just takes the fun out of it for all the other players.
    3. No godmoding. Even if it's permitted in some ACRONYMs, it isn't in others, and therefore shall not be allowed in the taverna.
    4. Players are allowed to make NPCs speak in whatever tone, colour, and font they so choose. If I, the thread runner, am not online, NPCs can be played by anyone.

    Repeated rule violaters (in nearly all circumstances OOC, but perhaps IC), can be punished by being IC banned from the thread. And therefore OOC banned to, under threat of mod being called to remove you for breaking thread rules.
    Any other rules can be submitted by PM, and can be considered. Please bear in mind that the rules of this thread may update. Alerts that updates have been made will be made clear on the rest of the thread.
    Last edited by happyturtle; 2009-01-01 at 02:50 AM.
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  2. - Top - End - #2
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Butler what did Vidilia do? Was Jaren involved in anyway?
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "Ha! I pegged you, didn't I?" Zee declares triumphantly. "You really do look like one of those tragic past sort of people. If you were more cheerful and didn't take personal quirks of other people so seriously I'll bet you would be a lot happier."

    She reaches inside the hat she isn't wearing and pulls out a salami and Swiss sandwich. Takes a few bites out of it before gesturing at DC with her dinner.

    "And I really doubt that. I've met lots of people that are genuinely irritating."

    Hey, look! And there he is now!

    "Hiya Vespe! I'm-"

    She says her name.

    A name of alien surrealness. Of utter unnaturalness. Something so foreign and yet terrifyingly familiar. It has a beauty and horror beyond words. Beyond thoughts.

    Beyond pudding.

    Wait... no, that last one really doesn't fit at all.

    The name is akin to a dream. So real. So very real as it is heard. And so is she. In that instant all else is bland and gray and blurred. She's real. More real than all else. And in that same instant the vision is gone. The name forgotten. Vanishing away like a dream upon waking. Fading from mind and memory.

    "-but people tell me that's hard to pronounce, so everyone just calls me Avatar."

    She smiles cheerfully.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "Oh Vidalia and Jaren ma'am?" Butler blushes a bit. "They were quite a bit of fun ma'am, but I don't think I should go into the explicit details ma'am." Butler is unaware of who Jaia's brother is.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Did Jaren ever....do anything to you? Anything Sexual? Alexis looks very very worried.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    DC blinks at the name. He can clearly see why most prefer not to use it.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Nice to meet you Avatar. Vespe smiles. I'm guessing with a name like that you're some sort of god, or otherwise really powerful being?

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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    He nods to Alexis, Jaia and Izzy right there next to him. "Of course ma'am. Those would be the explicit details ma'am. I was hesitant at first, ma'am, cause the concept was new, ma'am. But it was very... nice ma'am." Butler blushes again.
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  9. - Top - End - #9
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Why does he always get away with this.. Why must I be to late to stop him! I'm sorry sir...but you do know Jaren is an incubus and a very mean one at that? He takes parts of peoples souls by preforming sexual acts with them.
    Alexis looks sad, Outraged and Worried. I'm so sorry Butler
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "An incubus, ma'am?" He has no idea what that is, or anything about soul stealing. He feels alright, so everything must be fine.

    "I don't think there's any need to get worked up, ma'am."
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Maybe you got lucky then.. But I doubt it. Chances are you just don't feel anything. When you get a chance ask somebody else about incubus. Then you'll understand. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from having a bit of your soul eaten Butler.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "God? Hardly. Powerful? Not particularly," Avatar leans back in her chair, munching on the sandwich. "I'm a rogue avatar. Which I guess makes my not particularly imaginative nick-name a little bit more meaningful. The rest of me thinks I'm deluded. That I became too human. We hadn't ever made a human avatar before and the fact that We used me as the base didn't help."

    'Me' being the human said avatar was incorporated into. It's all rather complicated.

    "So instead of dominating a poor innocent human spirit the two sides of me mingled until there wasn't a difference. Sooo... I'm sorta a personification of fertility. From the Far Realms."

    She reaches into her pocket and pulls out an acorn.

    And whispers something to it. The plant immediately sprouts and grows into a teeny-tiny little oak tree right there in her hand. "I can make things grow. And develop. And evolve. And metamorphose."

    The tree is then engulfed in a pulsing, throbbing opalescent white radiance writhing with snapping tendrils of black mist. The strange substance begins to eat the tree. Quite literally. "And I can draw on my own matter-like dream to use offensively. But.... Side from that?"

    She tosses the dream, or rather nightmare, over her shoulder. It begins to ravenously eat a hole through the floor. "I'm pretty much a normal human."
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "Well, at least he has a...soul." The Third says as he passes Alexis. He heads over to the bar, gets a drink, doesn't like it and heads back. "Having only part of your soul...eaten can't be too bad, surely."
    Before you criticise someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you'll be a mile away and you'll have their shoes.

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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Far Realms...

    DC blinks. Isn't that the place where things like Draken were around?
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Butler is not the type to be smart enough to wrap his head around the concept of souls/incubi. "Umm... alright ma'am. If you say so, ma'am." He takes a large sip from his Nuka-Cola, completely unworried.

    Izzy doesn't seem to be offering him any help on understanding, either.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Izzy. Will you explain what a incubus does?
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Neat. Vespe says this in the manner one would use to describe a new car, or a particularly shiny sword, but not the fact that one is a personification of fertility from the Far Realms. I guess he's just used to that sort of thing.

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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Not Draken. But one of his squiddy buddies.

    Said Space Squid isn't terribly fond of Avatar. Thinks she's 'tainted' with material stuff.

    "Yeah, the Far Realms. Sometimes called the Outside. It's sort of an in-between place that's just beyond the realms of perception and shut off by a nice Barrier that generally keeps unpleasant things from spilling over into the material realms. Deranged cultists usually try to kick holes in it. Hopefully I don't have any here."

    She's told her deranged cultists that she isn't a god before. They decided that she was a deceiver and tried to kill her.

    "As for a location..."

    Avatar glances about the room thoughtfully.

    And then points perpendicular to reality.

    How this is possible isn't readily apparent.

    "It's over there."
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Of course not Draken. Things like him, as in, Elder Evils.

    Er... Of course...
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Elder Evils are from all sorts of different places. Some are ancient demons from before the rise of the mortals. Others are beings that devour gods. Or the world serpent. Or Atropus, the World Born Dead. And of course Draken.

    Avatar, or rather the rest of her, falls into this category as well.

    Her original mission was to twist, corrupt, and mutate all life into her aberrant offspring and absorb the world into her domain in the Far. It's kind of what Ragnnora, the Mother of All Monsters does.

    'course, being a rogue avatar means Avatar has no intention of any such shenanigans.

    "Oh! I run a pet shop. The Barkhouse Bestiary. What about you, Dee Cea? What do you do?"
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    DC blinks. There aren't many who called him by that nickname.

    Well, there are certain beings who are out to kill or do horrible things to me. There's also a lich who wants to end everything and his pet talking cat. I fight against them, mostly.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Avatar makes a sour face. "That sounds like a profoundly uninteresting line of work," she comments. "Trying to end the universe, eh? That's a fool's errand you know. You could probably ignore what they're doing and nothing would come of it."
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Well, there's also the fact that the lich is extremely irritating and nearly killed me once, opening up an opportunity for another enemy of mine, an insane psychic, to very nearly destroy my mind...

    He shudders.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Terry reappears at his usual table. He looks around, being too lazy to count the people, sips a Nuka-Cola, then stands up. "Ladies and Gents, I will now explain the concept of 'Rogue Paradoxal/Paradoxical Cutlery™'." Alas, Vespe didn't know that for a vampire, radiation is basically getting drunk. Terry is pretty resistant, but around ten gallons of rad is overkill for him. Terry pulls down a crappy looking overhead thing with doodles of a spork on fire, a spoon in a block of ice, and a knife with a skull behind it. With a happy face."There's the "Holy Flaming Sporks From Hell", which can kill most minor zombies. Then there's the "Unholy Freezing Spoons from Heaven", which kill decent zombies, mostly wearing silly hats. Then there's the "Jolly Doom-Filled Knives from Limbo", which kill all zombies. Thank you for listening." Terry sits back down.


    El pops out of nowhere next to Alexis, and orders a milkshake. Unfortunately for ol' Elly, the drink was spiked for Alexis so people could kidnap her. And not with alcohol, cause they wanted to humiliate Ally. So, it was spiked with... Cocaine. El sips her milkshake. "Hey Ally, what's up? And why does my drink taste funny?"

    (I waz grounded for being up at 12:00 AM and using my Laptop... BUT I ISH BACK!")
    Last edited by Terry576; 2009-01-17 at 08:38 PM.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Who would want to kidnap and humiliate Alexis besides =Jaren >.< >.>

    Oh hello El. I'll just get an apple cider if you please miss. Thank you. I don't know maybe because you are so used to have alcohol it tastes strange without it.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    El frowned. "Nah, it tastes funnier than that.... Hmmmmmm... Why are there flashing lights dancing around my head? Why am I so dizzy? Alexis, why do you have a hammer for a head?" As you can see, El's tolerance for drugs is much, much, much less than her tolerance for alcohol...
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    I don't know El..... Wait what? Detect poison. On the milkshake...yes that will detect drugs as well.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    Terry looks at Vespe. "Hey V, I forgot to tell ya somethin'. To us vampires, radiation is kinda like alcohol. Got any RadAway?"

    El groans. "Uuuugh... My head hurts a LOT...."
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    I'll assume I detect the poison then....
    Alexis will put her hand on El's shoulder and try and push the drugs out.. of her body.
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    Default Re: Taverna Generica 6: I am not a number, I am a free house!

    "Boy, you've got all sorts of flowers and sunshine to look forward to, don't you?" Avatar responds, sticking her tongue out playfully. "So you've got a lich, an evil cat, and what? Some kind of telepath all out to get you? How did you manage to tee them all off?"

    For good measure she quirks an eyebrow at the zombie-related slides.

    Radiation is vampire alcohol?

    Ooooh, she can't resist this one.

    "What sorta radiation?" she calls out. "Electro magnetic? Beta, alpha? Maybe something exotic like positrons? Oh! What about strange quarks?"
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