[3.5] So I died on the weekend. Boy was it worth it.

[Caeldrim]

Picture this. While escorting ~100 elven refugees to a city, we're "ambushed" by a freakin' army.

~600 black half-dragons, about 20 giant ape demon deelies, 5 half-dragon ogres towing an umber hulk, and a handful of 'medium bad evil guys'.

We run like the bejeezus towards the conveniently placed 'last holdout stronghold', and manage to slam the door behind us. So now we've got 100 elven commoners, about 5 low level elven fighters, and a party of 4 PCs, with a black dragon horde beating the door down. And there's no back door.

After a battle that can only be described as 'frackin' epic', with siege weapons, huge area effect spells, (lots of murderous mist and spike growth) and a major image of Bahamut coming to scare half the army into fleeing for their lives, and a LOT of lucky rolling, we had them down to about 15 half-dragon fighters, the ogres, the umber hulk (eep!) and one 'medium bad evil guy', who's standing back away from the pack, just watching.

As the rest of the party deal with the last of the half dragons, my character (the squishy wizard) decides it's time to shine. So I cast invisibility, step outside, cast polymorph (wyvern), and fly over to the MBEG, landing next to him as quietly as I can. I realise I'm taking a huge risk, but rule of cool dictates I have to do it (it's just that kind of character). I land fairly quietly next to him, and on my next turn manage to hit him with Tail, Poison, Bite, 2 Claws, and one Wing. Everyone cheers, and I think i've gotten off scot free.

He turns around and crits me for massive damage, and I die instantly.

The rest of the party manage (in my absence) to deal with the last of the baddies, and after a night's rest, the druid reincarnates me. As a goblin.

*facepalm*

Got what was coming to me for such a ridiculous tactic, but boy was it fun. :)

Now I have to go around with my face wrapped in bandages a la 'the invisible man' or else risk constant cries of 'AAAH IT'S A GOBLIN, KILL IT!'.

[The Neoclassic]

Now I have to go around with my face wrapped in bandages a la 'the invisible man' or else risk constant cries of 'AAAH IT'S A GOBLIN, KILL IT!'.

So your DM has it in for goblins now too? Geez, I'd be so frustrated if I was you. Kudos for the good attitude on your part. Also, amusing story.

[Oracle_Hunter]

~600 black half-dragons, about 20 giant ape demon deelies, 5 half-dragon ogres towing an umber hulk, and a handful of 'medium bad evil guys'.

Well, some Black Dragon has been very busy

[kladams707]

Well maybe some of them are 1/4 black dragon, they're just counted as half black b/c of their skin.

[Lert, A.]

I agree, that would be worth it.

[Assassin89]

I somewhat understand the plight of goblins. In the sacred shrine campaign, one of the four PCs was a goblin fighter. Because he was a goblin, he was not allowed into a town without the sorcerer bluffing the guard that the goblin was a prisoner/servant of the sorcerer. Even so the goblin had his sword peace bound. The goblin also had a difficult time convincing the mayor of the town that he was going to help with the water problem. I do not hate goblins in general, but this goblin threw me down a well after throwing the warforged down the same well.

[Inyssius Tor]

Now I have to go around with my face wrapped in bandages a la 'the invisible man' or else risk constant cries of 'AAAH IT'S A GOBLIN, KILL IT!'.

Speaking of druids...

Jake (newly reincarnated): Oh bloody hells; goblin again. TED!
Ted (doing something a fair way away): WHAT?
Jake: BREAK OUT THE DAGGERS; I GOT STUCK AS A GOBLIN AGAIN!
Ted: OH HELLS; GOBLIN BLOOD'S A REAL B**** TO GET OUT OF THESE ROBES!

[Lappy9000]

Impressive Story

That's quite a way to go. I personally have McCrittey, the d20 who rolls high constantly; but only for the DM.

[Arbitrarity]

That's quite a way to go. I personally have McCrittey, the d20 who rolls high constantly; but only for the DM.

I had one of those. I kept getting 18-20 for my attack rolls, and when I rolled the die to prove it wasn't biased, I got a 19.

My players stole that d20, and I was forced to use one of theirs for the night

[Caeldrim]

Well, some Black Dragon has been very busy

Yep. She sure has. In this campaign the BBEG is 'Matron Maya', a black dragon matriarch of sorts who likes to polymorph/shapechange into a kindly old granny type, with lots of pink frilly furniture and doilies and such.

She also gets around. And around. And around.

Fun campaign.

I'm thinking about making myself a 'hat of disguise' just so i can disguise myself as a halfling/gnome a little easier. Does anyone know of a similar item that works with 'alter self' instead of 'disguise self'?

I don't want to use it for cheese, just want to be able to walk comfortably in cities.

[The Glyphstone]

You don't need to look for cheese when you're using Alter Self. The cheese comes pre-packaged, and looks for you instead.

I can see a Halflingshape or Gnomeshape spell being OK as 1st or 2nd level effective, in the line of the X-shape spells from PHBII. Limits you to a single form, in this case a gnome or halfling.

Or you can just get yourself killed again and hope for a better Reincarnate roll. Find a Thought Bottle beforehand so you don't lose your level.

[Moff Chumley]

*sings* Homebreeeeeew!

[ShadowFighter15]

Thought bottle? What are those; memory-containing jars or something?

[Caeldrim]

I was hoping for something with more of an always-on effect like the hat of disguise rather than having to duck off to the outhouse every 80 minutes to re-cast. I realise it'll probably cost a lot but that's ok, i've got a fair bit of cash to splash around at the moment.

[Rei_Jin]

I'd have a look in the Races of the Dragon book, and then go through the ritual to turn yourself into either a Dragonborn or a Spellscale. No magic required after that.

Of the two, I'd recommend the Spellscale.

[evil-frosty]

Now my question has to be in wyvern form why didnt you just body slam him or land on him? U should still be able to get a few attacks plus huge creature falling on him.

[woodenbandman]

Epic battle. I did one of those one time. There were so many undead that they made ramps that piled all the way up the 400 foot walls. Out of undead. Some were still undead and not re-dead. The sizing spear was our friend, it was a giant missile of undead hate that knocked them all off the ramps, and then we kinda solved the rest of the problems with web.

[Nahal]

That's quite a way to go. I personally have McCrittey, the d20 who rolls high constantly; but only for the DM.

With one of my previous GM's, the dice went the opposite way. Whenever it came down to him vs me in some way, shape or form the dice consistently favored me over him. It got kinda funny after a while, especially when he would start swearing profusely after the BBEG missed me with his his Uber Falcon Punch attack.

[Caeldrim]

reading through the races of dragon book, there doesn't seem to be a ritual to become a spellscale, and the dragonborn of bahamut one is more of a 'bahamut comes to you' affair. I might ask the DM if after having kicked the arse of a bunch of evil dragons that bahamut might be interested in me now.

Cheers!

[Solaris]

reading through the races of dragon book, there doesn't seem to be a ritual to become a spellscale, and the dragonborn of bahamut one is more of a 'bahamut comes to you' affair. I might ask the DM if after having kicked the arse of a bunch of evil dragons that bahamut might be interested in me now.

Cheers!

Look again. This time, page 31-32. Rite of Spellscale Ascension.

[The Glyphstone]

Thought bottle? What are those; memory-containing jars or something?

They're rather broken items from..Complete Arcane, I think. You pay 500XP to effectively store your memories in the bottle, then at any time, you open the bottle and are immediately restored to that level of XP. Reusable, though it takes 500XP every time you "save game".

[Caeldrim]

Look again. This time, page 31-32. Rite of Spellscale Ascension.

Ah! good man.

Doubt the DM would allow it, or at least he'd make me FIND a spellscale to perform the rite (and fair enough).

Dragonborn of Bahamut looks a viable option though, especially since he was onboard with the idea at character creation, and we've been kicking 'spawn of tiamat' arse, AND in the epic battle in question i used a major image of bahamut to spook the crap out of the opposing army.

[kamikasei]

I'm thinking about making myself a 'hat of disguise' just so i can disguise myself as a halfling/gnome a little easier. Does anyone know of a similar item that works with 'alter self' instead of 'disguise self'?

No need. A hat of disguise lets you use it for a +10 to the disguise check; disguising yourself as another race is a -2. So sinc you're not trying to look like anyone in particular, you should be pretty effortlessly able to pass as any race you like (within size limits).

[Person_Man]

Awesome.

Of course, you should have just cast Invisibility and Polymorph on the party meatshield. He'd have much higher BAB and hit points. But hindsight is always 20/20.

[Draz74]

This reminds me a lot of my last character. He was a pretty un-optimal Wizard, but he abused Polymorph to make up for it. And he was pretty reckless sometimes, too.

And he died and got Reincarnated as a Kobold. *facepalm*

Sadly, the difference is that his death didn't happen while doing anything awesome. He got killed in the surprise round by an ambush of phase spiders. If he'd only rolled a 9 instead of an 8 on his Fortitude save vs. poison, the Lore of True Stamina ability he'd just picked up would have saved him ...

But at least, before he died, he lassoed down a vampire, abducted a high-ranking military officer by turning the party Monk into a Griffon, and, when stuck in the antimagic cone of a Beholder, drew his sap and whacked the beastie in the face (and made it out of that encounter unhurt!). Good times.

[Thurbane]

Now I have to go around with my face wrapped in bandages a la 'the invisible man' or else risk constant cries of 'AAAH IT'S A GOBLIN, KILL IT!'.

Our beguiler just got reincarnated as a Goblin too (he was a Gray Elf), in last night's session. He was less than impressed.

On top of that, we were just short of 9th level when he died. So now, the rest of the party have hit 9th, and he is midway through 7th (+XP from the battle he died in).

Also, his gear (armor, weapons) is now the wrong size for him.

[Fizban]

Yep. She sure has. In this campaign the BBEG is 'Matron Maya', a black dragon matriarch of sorts who likes to polymorph/shapechange into a kindly old granny type, with lots of pink frilly furniture and doilies and such.

She also gets around. And around. And around.

Fun campaign.

I'm thinking about making myself a 'hat of disguise' just so i can disguise myself as a halfling/gnome a little easier. Does anyone know of a similar item that works with 'alter self' instead of 'disguise self'?

I don't want to use it for cheese, just want to be able to walk comfortably in cities.

Dang you preempted me saying "Are you a wizard or what?" (that's even a reference...).

No alter self items that I know of, but 2nd level spell continuous isn't too spendy. Disguise self only allows a save if they touch you anyway, no reason you can't use a hat of disguise all day, especially if you go all wrinkly and worty (thereby removing some disconnect between your presumably ugly goblin skin and your disguise). Or you could go PrC hunting, I'm sure there's one with an hour/level humanoid transformation that won't gimp you too hard.

[newbDM]

<snip>

First of, let me say that I LOVE how the DM set that up (or were you just describing it more awesome than it was?). I would have liked to be in that game.

Are you in an epic level game? If not, what level was your party?

Thirdly, can you please tell me what you meant by "last holdout stronghold"? Are we talking Lord of the Rings where the elves are nearly extinct, or was there some other fluff to that stronghold? I won't lie, I am saving this thread for future inspiration/copyright infridgment, since it just seemed that awesome.

Can you also tell me why there were so many half-black dragons? Is there an evil dragon breading armies or something?

Also, that must have been a pretty bad "medium" bad guy NPC to survive all those attacks, and then instant crit a wyvern.