Kender Taunts!!

[HighONseaweed10]

So I have been playing a kender in Ravenloft...which you can see is working out greatly
since I am a kender I wanted to get some great taunts from you guys.... funny taunts, yo mama jokes, ugly jokes, fat jokes, undead jokes, wear wolf.. that list goes on...anything good^^

[AslanCross]

Yo mama's so fat, when she turned around, it was the next day!
Yo mama's so stupid, when she jumped out of the window, she went up!

That's all I've got, sorry.

[zerombr]

i prefer the classic Tasslehoff quote, "I don't know anyone stupid enough to try to mate with an orc, but if there was one, he'd be your father!"

[ErrantX]

"Is that your head or did your neck throw up?"
"Is that your nose or is that a disease?"
"Were your parents that ugly too?"
"Is that a beard or are you just rabid?"
"My Uncle Trapspringer once saw an person so ugly it made him sick. Was that you?"
"Was your dad the ugly stick?"

That's all I got for now.

-X

[BlueWizard]

So I have been playing a kender in Ravenloft...which you can see is working out greatly
since I am a kender I wanted to get some great taunts from you guys.... funny taunts, yo mama jokes, ugly jokes, fat jokes, undead jokes, wear wolf.. that list goes on...anything good^^

Best game I ever played was Ravenloft and my friend played a Kender. The DM was great too.

This player was a natural, and kenderisms came to him.

[Thanatos 51-50]

"Why is it you druids are always hugging the Ugly Tree?"

[Hat-Trick]

Or better yet, "I bet you hit every branch when you fell out of the Ugly tree, didn't you?"

"You wouldn't know a sword if it was stuck in your gullet!" Seems pretty appropriate.

[shadzar]

Usually vampires are supposed to have good looks, but you must have sucked on the wrong thing, and as they say you are what you eat.

To skeletons: Stick and stones can break my bones, but at least I still have skin and flesh left!

I have been to many planes of existence and by far your domain makes the nine hells looks like Heaven.

Look out their is a piercer hanging form your face! Nevermind its just your big nose.

To plant-creature: Hey was your father the ugly stick?

[Eldan]

Just walk by, blink a few times with a confused look, say "woah" and walk on.

[shadzar]

I hear Takhisis is great for a good time. Her having 5 heads/mouths and all that.

[bosssmiley]

So I have been playing a kender in Ravenloft...

Define "thematic dissonance"...

[SilentNight]

"Ahem, your matha so fat, that when she jump for joy, she get stuck. Thank you." Or from James Brown, "Hit me!" * Leaves with paltry contribution*

[evisiron]

"Yo mamma may be a level one commoner, but her stink is CR 9!"

"THATS how you fight?! Well, at least someone is making the monks feel good..."

"Ouch, looks like someone took a whizz in that gene pool."

"Can someone undo that undead? Please?"

[Seffbasilisk]

As a Kender...they don't always have to make sense. IE: "Pickle pickle pickle!"

[Croverus]

"Do you carry that big weapon to compensate?"

"You call that scary? I've seen your mother; she does it better."

"Did you buy those pants from a dwarf?"

[HighONseaweed10]

"You call that scary? I've seen your mother; she does it better."

hahahaha i like this one^^