Most Embarrassing Deaths

[KillianHawkeye]

Everyone share your stories of the deaths that filled you with shame!



Mine happened tonight: I was playing my NE Necropolitan Dread Necromancer who was level 2. Since I don't care about the other party members, I sometimes wander off alone (bad idea, I know) and I came across a young half-orc and a gnome in the dungeon. We'd been fighting the orcs for 2 days. Some other gnome we'd just rescued had asked us to find her brother, which was the gnome in the room. He was chained to the wall. The two of them were hiding under the desk since our party had made a lot of noise in the hall passing by a few minutes earlier.

Anyway, the half-orc was only like 10 years old, and I'm Evil, so I figure I can get some information out of him since he was left to watch this gnome, but the kid zaps me with a shocking grasp. I tried to hit him with my Dread Necro touch attack, but rolled low, and the kid hits me with acid splash. I try attacking with my magic quarterstaff and and fumble and drop it, but luckily the kid jumps up on the bed and rolls a natural 1 with his ray of frost. I only have 2 spells left, so I try summon undead I to get a skeleton, but we continue to roll horribly. Meanwhile, the kid pulls out a club or a mace or something and kills me with a max damage roll.

So yeah, I got bludgeoned to death by a 10 year-old half-orc sorcerer.

[Pika...]

I once had a rogue find that a lowering then rising set of stairs leading to a door on the opposite side was a spike trap. I decided to have him try jumping the gap to the other door.

I think I got like a 3 on my Jump Check.

Although it made for good laughs.

[Avilan the Grey]

Showing off my new equipment too much and when finally realizing I have to get out of there (cave room) I roll too low, fumble, and can't climb up the damn rope in time. Hacked to death by three orcs, who, the DM tells me, is laughing at me as they do it.

(My teammates couldn't help me because had told them to go ahead without me.)

[Pika...]

Showing off my new equipment too much and when finally realizing I have to get out of there (cave room) I roll too low, fumble, and can't climb up the damn rope in time. Hacked to death by three orcs, who, the DM tells me, is laughing at me as they do it.

(My teammates couldn't help me because had told them to go ahead without me.)

How nice was the equipment?

[Temet Nosce]

I honestly don't really have any deaths which embarrass me, but I do have a story to share from a ways back about the rest of a party I was in.

Basically, there had been a previous game which ended when all the players other than me stopped showing up. The DM got frustrated, moved the game to a different venue and got new players (other than me, he let me keep my character).

Off we went, we started in a desert and the DM had it start raining acid. Now, we had tents that were proofed against this kind of thing, so I went to set mine up will the rest of the party "discussed" what to do. Their conclusion? They needed to dig into the sand to get away from the rain. So they dug a hole, in the sand, to get away from acid rain. Now, the DM warned them repeatedly with gradually increasing damage while shooting me PMs about how he couldn't believe this... After giving them several rounds to figure out how incredibly stupid the idea was he just gave up and dealt enough damage to kill them... They died digging a deeper pit, up to their waist, in acid.

Yeah, after that my DM gave up on that campaign. My head still hurts thinking about those people.

[vikbra]

Me and a couple of friends played D20 Modern a couple of years ago and the character I made was the ultimate fight machine. His background included things like special military training and some hardcore criminal experience and I had optimized him to be as good as he could be using guns.

Our first fight was against some kind of pathetic robber who didn't even know how to hold a gun that was threatening a poor girl behind the counter at some sort of store.
First round went like this:
I got my gun, took aim and fired... and rolled a natural one.
He turned around fired at me... a critical hit... maximum damage...

So my ultimate fighting machine died from the first shot fired at us.

[Avilan the Grey]

How nice was the equipment?

This was not a D&D game:

A wind-forming sword (basically when raised over my head it could cast wind bursts strong enough to topple medium-sized opponents several times a day (combined, if I recall, with a Cold Damage enhancement); an armor with high bonuses in general and a "wind rider" enhancement (basically it gave a huge bonus to riding skills when riding flying animals) and a shield that randomly could discharge thunderbolts when struck.

(Basically an Air / Weather themed set I had found in that very dungeon).

[Gorbash]

We were playing Shackled City AP, and we were on Occipitus, just having finished the Cathedral of Feathers part and we decided to rest there for a few days to heal all ability dmg etc, so we decided to clear up the rest of the rooms we skipped on our first way in.

One room was full of flying books, which attacked anyone who came in (a trap). The moment we entered 2d6 books launched themselves at each of us.

I got hit by 11, each dealing 2d8 points of holy damage. So yeah, my wizard got killed by a bunch of books.

Worst part is, I would have survived if I had my buffs on me (namely Heart of Earth and False Life), but since I didn't specifically mentioned that I cast them that day, the DM rules I didn't so I died.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Whilst getting an evil 'thing' (we didn't know what it was at the time) we encountered a half-elf having a tea party, with two plush animals. Then when one of our party members threatens him, and his friend, a possessed doll joined the half-elf. My Barbarian (14 max HP) had been injured in the battles with a rocking horse, jack-in-the-box, and animated statue, and now only had 8 HP. First round, the plush dragon shoots a breath of fire at me, bringing me to ~3 HP, and my 22 attack roll failed to hit the doll, who had used combat expertise. I charged it, and got a 20 on my roll. Because the DM hadn't said the doll used Combat Expertise this round, I thought I would hit. So, my DM, in a stroke of kindness said that she, in fact, did not. My attack just barely hits the doll, but slices it in half. Just before my attack landed, the doll brought me to -7 HP with a claw attack. Next round, I drop my Rage, fall to -9, and the Half-Elf that was having the tea party killed me.

tl;dr: I got brought to -7 by a doll, a plush dragon, and a rocking horse, then killed by a tea-party having half-elf.

[Ceaon]

My monk had just seen his best friend the fighter get horribly beaten by skeletons. I tell him to be more careful as we approach another gloomy house.
"You see a closed door," the DM says.
Me (to fighter): "Let me handle this, friend, because you'll get yourself killed!"
Fighter: "Look, I'm the fighter, don't you think it should be me who..."
Me (to DM): "I bust in the door, with all my strength!"
Fighter:
Me:*rolls* "Yay! I got 24!"
DM: "You bust in the closed, but not locked, door, completely destroying it the process."
Me: "Awesome. I told you to let me han-"
DM: "As you stumble down, the zombies that are in the building get an attack of opportunity."
Me: "-dle... wait, what?"
DM: *rolls* "What's your AC? Oh, right, 20."
Me: "Wait, you told me it was locked, didn't you? I mean, wait!"
DM: *rolls* "So, five hits, let's roll damage."
Me: "I'm dead."
DM: "Wait, what?"
Me: "I'm at 3 HP now. Whatever you roll, I'm dead. The minimum damage is way more than 13, right? I was just acting protective of my friend. You know, ehm, trying to be in character."
Fighter: "So, busting open doors with destruction for both involved parties as a consequence... that's in character for you?"
Me: "Wait, I was trying to be heroic!"
Fighter: "Heroic as in, immediately dying just after you swore to protect me. And the cause of your death is a... door?"
DM: "Sorry, man."
Me:

[Gorbash]

Unless the Zombies have somehow been expecting you, they couldn't have made their attacks of opportunity, since they were flat-footed...

[Myou]

Unless the Zombies have somehow been expecting you, they couldn't have made their attacks of opportunity, since they were flat-footed...

Plus, kicking in a door doesn't provoke an AoO from creatures on the other side. Seems like DM fiat. o.O

[Demons_eye]

16 whales fell on my cleric.

[Pika...]

16 whales fell on my cleric.

O.o

Um, you need to explain this one dude.

[Demons_eye]

Random treasure of book of fishes, roll some dice to see what falls from the sky. Me and this Paladin fighting this golem right? I am a cleric healing the Pally every time hes hit, we are in a hallway so its focused on him and can't get to me. Dm tells us it looks fine so we assume it to hard of a fight and I tell the pally to run. I break out the book of fishes roll and get 16 whales to fall on me and the golem. Later we find out it was 5 hp way from death and I was like but then when I looked at it later I was like

[Pika...]

Random treasure of book of fishes, roll some dice to see what falls from the sky. Me and this Paladin fighting this golem right? I am a cleric healing the Pally every time hes hit, we are in a hallway so its focused on him and can't get to me. Dm tells us it looks fine so we assume it to hard of a fight and I tell the pally to run. I break out the book of fishes roll and get 16 whales to fall on me and the golem. Later we find out it was 5 hp way from death and I was like but then when I looked at it later I was like

The poor whales.

[Demons_eye]

Sad part was if I had lived I had just killed 16 CR 5 whales and a golem. Would have been like level 8-9.

[Yukitsu]

I've only lost one character, and that was to a pretty tough fight.

However, I've doled out plenty of embarrasing deaths as a PC. One of my favourites was with my psychotic little girl character. We were in a pirate haven for the day, and I decided to find a slaver and stalk him all day, singing a song about stalking people. Later that night, I teleported into his house, drained his dex to zero (still singing) and woke him up, before putting his face in a shallow bowl of water (still singing).

I also managed paralyzing a rogue that was chasing after me. I don't actually carry a weapon on this character, so I had to pick up a kitchen knife, and with my strength 6 and small size hit him for a full 3 minutes doing 1 damage per hit.

[J.Gellert]

I don't have any, because I have not lost a character to date... but my two party members from one campaign do.

Our lord but secretly the villain sends us through a portal to a village directly in the way of obvious-big-bad's undead army. While the commoner's flee through said portal, we see the necromancer hovering in the air over the near hilltop, his skeletons pouring down towards us.

Then the party's fighter decides it's a good idea to give him the finger. Then charge up the hill. The rogue and I followed him (I was playing an elf-lord style cleric of corellon, so it was with a little "sigh" that I decided to charge).

As soon as we are within range of the necromancer? Circle of Death in our face. Fighter dies, rogue dies, and I'm the last man standing because I was making a more cinematic charge (fly spell on my horse). Getting their corpses back was a pain.

Moral of the story: Don't flip your finger to a necromancer. Don't give the finger to any NPC that is obviously not supposed to die yet.

[Yukitsu]

I do that all the time though. If they weren't meant to die yet, my DM wouldn't have put them into a campaign world that contains me. Like that level 18 cleric my level 9 necromancer just fought.

[Calmar]

I played a knight. It sucked, because it was weaker than a fighter (at least the way I built/played it...) and because everyone tried to tell me what a knight could, or could not do without violating his %§&%! roleplay-and-character-development-preventing code of conduct (or however it is called). Therefore my DM and I decided to let him die by letting a natural bridge over an underdark chasm crumble, with him falling down into the seemingly bottomless darkness for good.
Somehow our powergamer managed to cast a featherfall spell on him, letting him slowly float his way down into oblivion... Even the death of this guy was nothing but carp.

[chiasaur11]

Moral of the story: Don't flip your finger to a necromancer. Don't give the finger to any NPC that is obviously not supposed to die yet.

Those, my good sir, are the NPCs most in need of a good double deuce.

[Glyde]

Died falling down stairs trying to jump-tackle skeletons.

[Lycan 01]

*scratches chin*

I... I don't think I've ever had an embarrassing death. Actually, in my entire... 6 years of playing variour RPGs, I've only had two characters die. One died a rather heroic death, IMO, but the DM said it was a somewhat stupid move, IIRC. I'll let ya'll decide...


I forget what the name of the game was. It was basically a World War 1 DnD-based system. Very simple, very fun. I was the team sniper, and my squad ended up in a building clearing out some rebel soldiers. Well, my team ended up on one side of a room behind an over-turned table, and the bad guys were on the other side of the room behind some furniture. Lo and behold, a grenade lands behind the table with us. Everyone rolled a dodge roll - half the team failed. I realized that if the grenade went off and, at best, stunned the guys who failed, they'd be easy targets for the bad guys, who were about to open up on us with at least one machine gun and several rifles. So it came my turn... Dodging would be easy, and the worst I'd get might be a few flesh wounds or a shooting penalty. But... I didn't want to leave my friends to die. So I rolled to pick up the grenade and throw it back. I figured that if I could throw it back at the enemy, they'd have to dive for cover, and my team wouldn't have to pay for their bad Dodge rolls.

Well...

I rolled a 3.

The result was not pretty. My arm was obliterated, and my shrapnel-riddled body was hurled to the ground with a wet, pulpy smack. I retained consciousness just long enough to crack off one last pistol shot, which missed - my character didn't care, though. He'd died to save his friends, and that was all he cared about. My body absorbed most of the blast, and only one guy on my team was stunned. The rest of the squad quickly dragged him to safety, and they even lit and candle and said a quick prayer for me in a nearby alley.

So yeah. I accepted my death as a heroic sacrifice, the DM said it was a stupid move, and the rest of the team was too stunned to say anything.

What do ya'll think?

[Pika...]

*scratches chin*

I... I don't think I've ever had an embarrassing death. Actually, in my entire... 6 years of playing variour RPGs, I've only had two characters die. One died a rather heroic death, IMO, but the DM said it was a somewhat stupid move, IIRC. I'll let ya'll decide...


I forget what the name of the game was. It was basically a World War 1 DnD-based system. Very simple, very fun. I was the team sniper, and my squad ended up in a building clearing out some rebel soldiers. Well, my team ended up on one side of a room behind an over-turned table, and the bad guys were on the other side of the room behind some furniture. Lo and behold, a grenade lands behind the table with us. Everyone rolled a dodge roll - half the team failed. I realized that if the grenade went off and, at best, stunned the guys who failed, they'd be easy targets for the bad guys, who were about to open up on us with at least one machine gun and several rifles. So it came my turn... Dodging would be easy, and the worst I'd get might be a few flesh wounds or a shooting penalty. But... I didn't want to leave my friends to die. So I rolled to pick up the grenade and throw it back. I figured that if I could throw it back at the enemy, they'd have to dive for cover, and my team wouldn't have to pay for their bad Dodge rolls.

Well...

I rolled a 3.

The result was not pretty. My arm was obliterated, and my shrapnel-riddled body was hurled to the ground with a wet, pulpy smack. I retained consciousness just long enough to crack off one last pistol shot, which missed - my character didn't care, though. He'd died to save his friends, and that was all he cared about. My body absorbed most of the blast, and only one guy on my team was stunned. The rest of the squad quickly dragged him to safety, and they even lit and candle and said a quick prayer for me in a nearby alley.

So yeah. I accepted my death as a heroic sacrifice, the DM said it was a stupid move, and the rest of the team was too stunned to say anything.

What do ya'll think?

I say it's one fo those if you succeed it was heroic, if you fail it was stupid situations.

Picture related:

[OverdrivePrime]

2nd edition AD&D random dungeon game.
9th level party.
I was a wizard. We also had a rogue, paladin and a fighter.

We ran into a lich. Paladin forgot that he had a Sun Sword, and instead plinked at it with arrows. The fighter failed vs a stun spell, the rogue ran away in terror. I cast my worst spell and the lich laughed it off. Then hit me with polymorph.

I was turned into a turnip.

A sentient turnip.

Who was swiftly picked up by a kobold and put into stew. From almighty wizard to a stewed turnip, eaten by a hungry family of kobolds. Quite a blow to the ego.

But at least it was a TPK!

[Iliad]

While this hasn't happened to me but: I think in DMG 2 they provide mob rules and give two examples of a mob. One's a mob and the other is a throng of children. The throng of children is cr 5. That means most likely any four level 1 adventurers with swords and magic would be defeated by 25 kids.

That would a very embarrassing tpk.

[Jade_Tarem]

We've had a few in my group. The only one that personally embarrassed me was a game DM'ed by the group's powergamer - we don't mind, he's a pretty good DM.

We're playing a level 7ish game. For reasons known only to myself and God, I had decided to play a drow warblade mercenary character. After royally screwing up a scouting mission we were paid for by a local militia, that same militia was attacked by a bunch of giantkin.

One enemy in particular seemed more badass than the others. He was riding a dire bear - or maybe just an advanced bear, and shooting. The party closed in on him, and I decided to do the dramatic combat roleplaying thing and jump on the bear to fight the half-ogre rider. I figured I could take the AOO from the bear and get to chopping.

I make the jump check, and as my character leaps through the air, the bear attack/grapples and wins by a lot. He crits in the process. My character is dead before his body hits the ground. It made for a rather humorous scene though. "Kyaaaaaaaa-HURK!" *NOM NOM NOM*

[sofawall]

Well, me and party were in Sharn (Eberron) and we had riled up the place. We needed to get out, and fast. We had associates with an Airship, but getting to them was going to be a problem. I, being the wonderful changling sorcerer that I am, turned into an attractive female human to try to get an aircar to stop for us. Low and behold, it did!

Now, also being CN and very... unconcerned with the rest of the party, I told him to leave without getting my compatriots, who were hiding. The Barbarian, however, saw me, and with a combination of fast movement and the run feat, managed to jump up and grab the aircar. This was good, as it was someone else to hide behind.

Being both low wisdom and low int, I told the barbarian that I was going to get help, and we weren't abandoning the rest of the group. He accepted this explanation. When his back was turned, I proceeded to Shocking Grasp him in the back, as he was at 13 hp, and I really didn't want a witness.

I rolled all ones for damage. Barbarian got mad, tried to grapple me, rolled, yes, a one (hoorah!), and I managed to convince him it was the pilot, not me. He proceeded to decapitate the angry and confused pilot.

There is now no one piloting the aircar.

The Barbarian had a feather fall token, and needed to roll a, 12, was it? I did too, and needed a 10 to use it in time.

He rolled an 18.

I rolled a 3.

Splat.

[The New Bruceski]

My first character in 4th edition was on a first-name basis with the Raven Queen. One in-character embarassment, the rest were OOC.

IC, killed by an anvil falling on his head: Our first "quest" had us trying to find out how someone was stealing from a tavern. We caught some kids sneaking in through some underground catacombs. During the pursuit they climbed up a hole into a forge, and my Fighter climbed up after them. They dumped a suit of armor down the hole, and it barely missed me. Right when I was about to reach the top, they got the anvil over there, and I wasn't so lucky. With falling damage I was one hit point shy of death, so I'm counting it.

OOC, killed by foolish tactics over and over again: my other deaths came throughout the campaign. Forgetting my job of defending the others, I would charge after one group of monsters, or I would dodge right while everyone else dodged left. Suddenly cut off, I died three times (which is why it's embarrassing) from being swarmed, and once because I was the only non-Cleric trained in Heal, so when he went down I ran across the battlefield to heal him, then got cut down myself. The cleric needed a 2 on the roll to stop my bleeding, and rolled a 1 three turns in a row while I failed my saving throws.

OOC, killed by DM inattentiveness: We took shelter from a storm and found the cave occupied by two bears. The DM rolls damage against me, and I go from full health to dead. Turns out the statblock for Dire Bears is right on the adjacent page, and he looked at the wrong one for their attacks. The attack was undone, of course, but during the whole fight he kept referencing the wrong numbers and catching himself. We did get a new group joke out of it, and whenever we fight an X we now make sure it's not a Dire X.