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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Titan in the Playground
     
    DracoDei's Avatar

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    Default (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Wikipedia-like cross indexing: Another being with Chickens in her portfolio

    Chicken Golem: Created by the servants of Cluckzor and/or She-Who-Clucks, these golems are created by gluing live chickens together. They are almost as inefficient as they sound as far as combat potential per hit-die, but hey, at least they are fairly cheap!

    A VERY belated link to a class based around summoning chickens, which might result from the blessings of Cluckzor.


    This is an interesting idea that has been floating around in my head for a very long while. I delayed at one point because I didn't want to post it too close to someone else's chicken-goddess: "She Who Clucks". I need suggestions on who to make the fiend who caused his brain-damage, and also his parents. His cult should be played for laughs at first... then let the PCs see through the double-talk to discover the great tragedy of Cluckzor.

    My formatting is probably off... but I wanted to get this written down before I chickened out (pun intended) again.

    Cluckzor
    Lesser Deity
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral, with strong tendencies to BOTH Good and Evil.
    Titles: Lord of Chickens, The Most Amazingly Evil of the Gods
    Domains: Evil, Destruction, Good, Healing, Madness
    Portfolio: Chickens.
    Favored Weapons: Beak or Spur... for those without either it is the Punching Dagger.

    Cluckzor was born under a different name... but it was never that widely known to begin with, and speaking it became... unwise. And yes, not only was he born of the union of two deities, he is so young that this event actually occurred at a time within recorded history. He was but young, and his parents had spoken through their own followers to recruit a modest priesthood for him, giving him dominion over chickens to start him out slowly. One day his parents sent him down to the Abyss to go find some fiends to slay, much as mortal farmers might send a very young boy out into the fields with a small sack of rocks to throw at crows.

    The Lord of Chickens suffered grave misfortune... he encountered an arch-fiend (deity?) who had retreated to that place for some peace and quiet. Vindictive at having his thoughts disturbed, and not initially wanting to rouse himself to his full combat potential this foe struck at both his brain with a pick, and his mind with spells beyond the ken of any mortal magic... the god who would be Cluckzor fled, and wandered in confusion for a while, before the fiend found him again. Having discovered who the one that he had struck down was, the fiend spoke to him with beguiling words, turning him against his divine parents and seeking to make him into a scion. This process was in its midst when his parents approached, wondering why he had not returned... Cluckzor (for that was the name he now used) and the fiend attacked. While his parents could have defeated the fiend, it would not have been without bringing such forces to bear that it would have destroyed the already delicate (but not weak) Cluckzor.

    They withdrew to their home and sent messages about the situation to their mortal agents, telling them to recruit as many new clerics for their fallen son as possible and have them importune him continuously to return to his home... this proved disastrous, for Cluckzor now so hated his parents and his old name that he reached out through his link to his priesthood and massacred them... Only a few survived, and, for a while they did not dare pray again... they gathered together to grieve... and noticed a similarity between themselves... all had been rather timid in their prayers to the one who had screamed in their mind that he was now CLUCKZOR THE MAGNIFICENT, and had phrased their prayers to him either in the form of sarcasm, or had dared to outright lie, worshiping him as a god of Evil (although keeping the actual harm they caused modest) in hopes of attracting his favor so that they might then have better leverage to beg him to return to his home... inspired by his parents they essayed to try a bizarre experiment, thus was born the most unusual priesthood. Clerics of Cluckzor are rigorously trained in double-talk, double-think, and the highest of moral standards before they are even considered for initiation. In game terms this means that a 1st level cleric of Cluckzor must have at least a +7 Bluff modifier (not a few have at least one other level before they join the cult, but bluff is added to the cleric skill list for them) and may ONLY be Chaotic Good. His clerics operate fairly openly, and blithely refer to themselves as cultists, affecting horrific vestments made from the various bones of chickens, and festooned with chicken feathers. Their rites include plucking chickens alive, then tearing off their wings, lower legs, and finally head, slowly with their bare hands(technically heavily gloved in case the chicken gets loose enough to peck... but you get the idea). Note that chickens are the ONLY thing that they will willingly commit Evil acts against(and then, only because they firmly and resolutely believe it to the necessary sacrifice (pun not intended) to keep Cluckzor from unleashing real Evil to the best of his abilities)... everything else is a sham that Cluckzor's broken mind does not see through. They encourage supplicants for healing to recite a litany of their (usually incredibly venial) sins, then sneeringly tell them "it is a start" before "rewarding" them for their petty crimes with the spell and accepting the usual monetary donation with promises that it will be used to "bring the glory of suffering to the world" before giving backhanded admonitions to avoid bad behavior, phrased as paper-thin tips for becoming more evil.

    They will hunt down evil-doers, then spit on their corpses and perform other such incredibly mild and petty "desecration", which they will hurry to proclaim to the nearest undertaker (so that the fallen foe will receive a proper burial).

    Their greatest goal however is the eventual reform of their deity. As such the only place they show true ruthless efficiency is in their self-policing... any who fall from the path of Good are named Paragons of Cluckzor... and dispatched to him in "celebration" so that they may be rewarded. Said send off consists of skinning them alive, then deep-fat frying them... extensive magic is used to keep the Paragon alive throughout this process right up until the breading... they arrive to Cluckzor in the form of Lemures (and utterly unable to be promoted from that state), unable to influence him toward actual evil.

    Cluckzor dwells in a poorly constructed shack in the Abyss... it is actually an architectural marvel due to the fact that it remains standing at all, despite being constructed entirely of live chickens glued together. His priesthood long ago convinced him that he was utterly unworthy to communicate in any way with the fiend who caused his brain-damage, and similarly that any lesser fiends, other than those of his own creation, are utterly unworthy to speak with him. He has a small court of various awakened chickens, awakened dire chickens, chickenales (use vrock stats but remove Dance of Ruin), and other such poultry-esque creatures that he has created.
    Last edited by DracoDei; 2020-03-26 at 01:08 PM.
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  2. - Top - End - #2
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Zexion's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Portfolio: Chickens.
    Wow. Just wow. The corrupting story is quite depressing, though.
    Avatar by CrimsonAngel.

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    Titan in the Playground
     
    DracoDei's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Quote Originally Posted by Zexion View Post
    The corrupting story is quite depressing, though.
    Glad to hear it... sort of... I actually intended for him to not be quite corrupt... some part of him still remembers his upbringing and finds comfort in the good deeds of his clerics (remember, he has strong tendencies to BOTH Good AND Evil), even as he also rejoices in the trappings of being Evil... he is so badly brain-damaged that he never even notices the contradiction...

    Basically the tragedy is more about the brain-damage than the corruption... I was exploring the concept of a deity who was a drooling moron... at least by diety standards.

    Also, I added notes on his realm...
    Last edited by DracoDei; 2010-03-13 at 07:21 PM.
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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Zexion's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Cluckzor dwells in a poorly constructed shack in the Abyss... it is actually an architectural marvel due to the fact that it remains standing at all, despite being constructed entirely of live chickens glued together. His priesthood log ago convinced him that he was utterly unworthy to communicate in any way with the fiend who caused his brain-damage, and similarly that any lesser fiends are utterly unworthy to speak with him. He has a small court of various awakened chickens, awakened dire chickens, chickenales (use vrock stats but remove Dance of Ruin), and other such poultry-esque creature that he has created.
    Hilarious. Completely hilarious.
    Last edited by Zexion; 2010-03-13 at 07:28 PM.
    Avatar by CrimsonAngel.

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Deca's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    "But this was no chicken. This was evil incarnate."

    Sorry, I couldn't resist using that line.
    It's like an old steam train, but powered on insanity and pain.


    Uncle Fong avatar by Elagune

    My Homebrewed Creatures:

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Zexion's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Quote Originally Posted by Deca View Post
    "But this was no chicken. This was evil incarnate."

    Sorry, I couldn't resist using that line.
    Don't worry. Someone would have made the joke eventually.
    Avatar by CrimsonAngel.

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    Titan in the Playground
     
    DracoDei's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Tried to research the line... is it from a book called "Lemmings of Discord" by someone named Goodkind?
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    Orc in the Playground
     
    GreenSorcererElf

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Hi, I am still making my 20level chicken class, would you mind if I copy pasted, the basics of this god into a section of the entry? I would of coarse link to this with credits to you and explanations that this is where a full entry could be found? I also, wanted to add a bit in my, "prominent ChickenGods(name of the class I am makeing) section about two, almost, favored souls of CLUCKZOR. Since this would add on to the mythos you have made up I wanted to make sure it was o.k. with you.
    Last edited by Thugorp; 2010-10-20 at 09:48 AM.

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    Titan in the Playground
     
    DracoDei's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Quote Originally Posted by Thugorp View Post
    Hi, I am still making my 20level chicken class, would you mind if I copy pasted, the basics of this god into a section of the entry? I would of coarse link to this with credits to you and explanations that this is where a full entry could be found? I also, wanted to add a bit in my, "prominent ChickenGods(name of the class I am makeing) section about two, almost, favored souls of CLUCKZOR. Since this would add on to the mythos you have made up I wanted to make sure it was o.k. with you.
    Well, unless you somehow manage to deeply offend me, I would consider the whole thing a compliment, and the worst I am going to do (if it clashes with my vision) is to make a note that it isn't canonical. In either case I would edit in a link to the OP in this thread I think when I see the material added to yours (link me if I don't see it within a reasonable time period).
    [Public Service Announcement]P.E.A.C.H stands for Please Examine And Critique Honestly[/Public Service Announcement]
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    Orc in the Playground
     
    GreenSorcererElf

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    Hell if you want I can even just pm you the stuff first.

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    Titan in the Playground
     
    DracoDei's Avatar

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    Default Re: (3.X) (Deity) A Tragedy or a Comedy? [PEACH]

    That would work, but note that I am having connectivity problems.
    [Public Service Announcement]P.E.A.C.H stands for Please Examine And Critique Honestly[/Public Service Announcement]
    Extended Signature
    My Homebrew is meant to be used, but, if you do, PLEASE tell me how it goes.

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