Being Good Sucks! Let's Play: Pokemon Ruby, Hard Mode!

[The Shoveler]

Chapter 04: Why Am I Doing This Again?

Spoiler

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Now that the first badge is mine, I think it's time to...


Why must every major organization be retarded? First Silph Co., now this. -sigh- Might as well help out, it'll put up a good image for me.



Wow, you actually let them steal from you, even though you knew they would be targeting Devon and they announced that they were going to strike today. You guys suck.

The way to the crook's hiding place was full of eager trainers for me to harvest money from.


Yes, feed my Bonnie. Make her... is that a bug? I am compelled to make it mine...


Success! I shall name you... Scabbers. It seems appropriate.


See, this is why I love the bugger. First a PP Up, and now an Ultra Ball? Ziggy isn't so bad... ok, it sucks in combat, but for out of combat purposes it is awesome!

More of these overly eager trainers wanted to give me training, so I decided to go along with it. Doesn't hurt me if their pokemon don't survive.







There, that puts good ol' Scabbers up to beat with the rest of my team. Now it's time to stop that criminal before he-



Really? This man is holding your wife hostage? I shall make sure that he pays for this right away!

And so I bravely embarked into this cave that was sure to be filled with countless perils. Imagine my surprise when I found it was full of loud, annoying puff balls with ears that all deserve to die for not shutting up. Ever.

I would rather die than own a loud, obnoxious little hellspawn.


Wait, what? Why do you have a wingull? Tell me where that old man's wife is and you won't get hurt.


I had no idea it was talk like a pirate day! Oh wait, that's because-



Wait... PEEKO isn't that man's wife... but his Wingull? And what's worse is, you actually thought that you could hold this Pokemon, let me repeat, POKEMON, hostage in a cave... that has no exit. I have definitive proof that you people are the worst criminals that I've ever seen! I'm going to beat you up with this pokemon I just caught, now.




I know that was supposed to be an easy task, but why send only one person to steal from a company and why give him such a weak pokemon to do it with? You guys suck.

He then proceeded to kick me in the shin and run away, escaping without the slightest HINT of police from this reported incident. I see now! They can get away with being retarded because unlike Kanto or Johto, Hoenn has no police force to keep them in check!

Don't you DARE interrupt my monologue again, you little-


Don't avoid the conflict at-



How did he know my name? This is starting to get weird... Oh well, let's beat up some more trainers so Scabbers here can get stronger!





Ah, refreshing. Too bad Scabbers got hurt too much (1 HP and paralyzed) to do much else, so Toco took out the rest of the garbage.

I tried to leave, but I was stopped by that employee. Oh right, I was helping him, wasn't I?


No thanks, I don't need another one of your balls.


I could have said no, but I wondered if he would give me free stuff that didn't suck, so I followed.



Fine, but I'm only doing this because that's on the way and something deep in my gut says that you guys can't be trusted with your own crap.


-sigh- Fine.

-10 minutes pass- What the hell is taking-

Huh, so that's what took you so long. Fine, I'll have a chit-chat with this president of yours...





Oh really, but what would I get out of it if I said yes?


-recieves an orange pod... thing- What is this supposed to be?



If I killed him right here, would anyone care? His payment for my services is basically what I would need just to complete the damn mission! No, he's paying me for the mission already, no matter how crappy it is. Fine, it was along the way anyways...

As I was leaving the city, heading south to check out ol' Briney's crapshack sea shanty, I met up with that annoying twit May.


...You aren't going to use any of them in battle, are you?
Nope!
Then what's the point in catching them in the first place? If you can't use them (or abuse them) then why waste your money on them?
You don't understand! They're all for research. We couldn't do the research without them.
...You know, I think you are sicker than you look. You experiment on innocent creatures, truly disgusting. I hear Team Rocket is hiring, though, maybe you should join!

I then left her and proceeded to put Moveb*tch Zigzagoon to use cutting those two foot tall pieces of shrubbery that were arranged in such a way that one was slightly taller than the other and had a nice walkway cutting through it.


I also found some neat things that would sell well on the black market.




After that little excursion, I finally arrived at Briney's shanty of a shack. I was duly disgusted at what I found inside.

What. The. Hell? I knew you were attached to that Wingull, but... find a girlfriend or something, man!


You really are a senile old man, you know that?



HOW THE HELL DO YOU GET THIS INFORMATION?!

Of course, he dodged the question... again...

Oh well, might as well ride with him. Couldn't hurt too badly, could it?


God, I was wrong... -throws up on PEEKO-

Sorry for the late update, I've been busy in that fantasy place you people call the "Real World"

[doliest]

At the risk of sounding redundant, cool story, bro. You know what you need to get more people posting replies? Letting them have some power like asking them to vote on your team or something. Though they're pretty sadistic. As am I.

[FantasyFoxMan]

Damn, this LP is getting good. Keep it up. :3

[The Shoveler]

Yeah, I've been on my computer, but without internet. Photobucket won't work because it's too slow on this network, so I can't update the game with Chapter 05.

Too bad you guys can't vote on pokemon I catch, seeing as I have to catch the first one I see. I think voting on my team for gyms will suffice, though. I'll start the polls when I can update.

However, I caught an Aron in Chapter 05, so what should I name it?

[FantasyFoxMan]

Jake Steele. >:3

Wait, is it female? If it's female then I have no idea.

[The Shoveler]

Yeah, it's a male.

EDIT: I will have an update up tomorrow. Training sucks... and when I finally got all my pokemon up to Lv. 16 for the gym... all the pictures deleted themselves. So, I skipped the montage of training and just went with the Gym Leader and the Delivery into Magma territory.

Pokemon Caught:
Magikarp named Titania
Zubat named Eliza Bath (Female equivalent of Vlad the Impaler, real name Elizabeth Bathory)
Aron named JakeSteele

This training skip brought to you by Crush 40, bringing awesome rock music to Sonic games and montages since Sonic Adventure for the Dreamcast!

[Penguinator]

An interesting premise. I'll watch this LP.

Hang on, train the magikarp.

[The Shoveler]

Yeah, after the Electric Gym, I'm trading out Wingull for it.

I just realized that I can beat the leader! Shedinja!!

[Penguinator]

Wait, why after the electric gym? They both (eventually for Magikarp) have a 4x weakness to electric.

[The Shoveler]

Wait, why after the electric gym? They both (eventually for Magikarp) have a 4x weakness to electric.

Because I'm using the EXP Share for Magikarp, and I need all the EXP I can get before his Gym. Afterwards, I'm cool. I'll be high enough level not to care about squandered EXP and can use the gym/random trainers to level up if I need to.

Update being worked on right now. It takes a long time...

[The Shoveler]

Chapter 05: Data Shock

Spoiler

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ERROR... ERROR. SYSTEM REBOOT IN 3...2...1...
Ugh... what happened? I remember arriving in Dewford with that perverted seaman... but nothing else. Do I still have my pokemon?


I don't care how it happened, but this team is something I can be proud of.
INSERTION COMPLETED. CATASTROPHE AVERTED. DEOXYS CONTAINED.
Wh-What the hell?! I think I'm starting to hear things...

Huh? Where am I? Who are you?



I remember now... I came here to kick your ass so I could go on to... Slateport I think it was? Yeah, that sounds right. I believe I'd already delivered the Letter to some guy named Steven... then something happened and I woke up here.
Sounds trippy, dude! Let's have a gnarly battle, bro!
Fine, I'll beat the surfer talk out of you, since you obviously haven't escaped the 90's.



See, wasn't that just invigorating?
You... you beat me so easily... how?
With the random wild pokemon I caught on the way here.





Sounds... interesting. Well, see you later, I've got a certain CEO to pummel for giving me this crappy payment... I've never even needed to use it!!


Alright, the pervy sailor agreed to wait for me. Now to get to that stupid president.


Seems like the right place. Time to kick his ass for some really rare items!


Listen up, mate. I'm here to-



Thank you kindly!

Now, I can't let all that rage go to waste...

Yes, he'll do nicely.
-11 minutes later...-
Now tell me exactly WHO I'm supposed to deliver this package to in Slateport. SPIT IT OUT!

Good. Now I'll let you live in horrible agony. I think your president liked the show. Too bad you don't have guards here at this establishment!

With that fun out of the way, I decided to head to Slateport. I did promise to deliver this package to that Stern guy. Why is this piece of paper so important? Let's check it out!
ERROR...ERROR...SUBJECT HAS LEARNED TOO MUCH. DELETE. DELETE. DELETION COMPLETED.
Ugh, why is this happening to me?! Where am I THIS time...


Huh, maybe some "hot" girls are in there?


Out of the way, kid. Can't you see I'm trying to go ask that hot girl up there for a date? Want to fight? What? Pokemon battle? Oh, OK. I'll battle you, if that means you'll leave me alone.


Weak. Onwards!


So you need some flavor in your life? I know how you can add that, and it don't involve pokemon if you know what I mean.
-SLAP-
Fine then, I'll do your stupid pokemon battle. Why is that all people think about over here...


If you people wanted a firey-hot battle, why do you use Water types?!


Bring it on! But on a side note, you are butt-ugly. Get over yourself.



Why do you all suck? Oh well.




Thanks for the free drinks, sir! PEPSI?! I like COKE, dammit! I guess I'll just feed it to my pokemon when they seem thirsty.


A wall of dense meat, my one weakness! Hmm... maybe if I find this Stern guy, I can leave this town!


Seems like a good start.






This is really more trouble than it's worth. But I can't leave yet... I hate you Team Magma! Fine, I'll find the bastard.


Huh, the line's gone! Let's see what they were up to...

Bull crap! I'm not paying... fine, here's the money. Why do I have to PAY money to do my job...


Here's your-

TIME FOR YOU TO DIE YOU ANNOYING MOTHER F*CKERS!! LEAH, KILL!!



Who's next?!



So YOU are the one responsible for this retardation! I'm from Team Rocket, and I'm going to kill you Team Magma-
ANGER REACHING DANGEROUS LEVELS. TRIGGER UNLEASHING. CAUTIONARY PROCEDURES INITIATED. SUBJECT BEING DETAINED... DETAINING COMPLETED.

Why is this happening to me... Oh well, I've finished the assignment. Now it's time to go to the next gym, I guess. At least the path is clear...

EDIT: I caught a female Electrike. What should it be called?

[Domochevsky]

What... what exactly was that?

[The Shoveler]

What... what exactly was that?

Wait and you shall see, friend.

Yeah, I hate grinding and my game wasn't taking the screenshots I told it to, so I decided to skip the grinding by introducing a secondary plot to this game.

[The Shoveler]

Decided to name the pokemon "Jenny" after Jenny Sparks.

Also, we have character death! Who is it? Taking all bets!
Update will come later, after I grind AGAIN because the computer crashed as I was saving.

[XiaoTie]

Plot eh? Now this might be just the thing this LP was missing.

[The Shoveler]

Chapter 06: The Gap

Spoiler

Show

The proceeding events take place between the Museum and the end of the last chapter.

The subject is going to be out of it for a while. He is too weak for the challenges coming before him, so the Arbiters have chosen me to take over and train his team. Time to take on the local civilians in battles. Wait, is that wild creature attacking me?


You're actions are admirable, Jenny. You shall join this man's roster. Now, Leah, time to defeat this chubby civilian in battle to hone your powers.


Wait a minute, you aren't Johnny. Who are you? Answer me or I will be forced to take drastic measures!
Hmm. It would seem you are smart, Leah. I am merely an assistant to the great Arbiters, inhabiting the body of Johnny while he undergoes a detainment process.
How are you speaking in my tongue?
I'm not speaking in your tongue, I'm speaking the High Talk, which all creatures can understand. I merely know your pokemon languages as a protocol of my millennium of training.
Ugh! That jerk paralyzed me. It will pay the pain over ten fold!
Leah used Confusion!
Critical Hit!
Plusle Fainted!

It was nice chatting with you, Leah, but I'm afraid that I must dismiss you in order to train the other members of the team. Come Bonnie, we must get stronger.


I can take on all comers! I'll get stronger for you, Johnny!
It would seem that this one isn't so... intelligent. It does seem to have guts, though. Useful in battle, but that's about it.


Double battle? Bonnie, Toco, show them your teamwork.

No problem, Johnny!
That's... not Johnny.
What are you talking about? Of course it's Johnny! See, he looks the same as always!
He may look the same, but his voice and attitude are different somehow.
My identity is of no concern. Just think of me as an ally and defeat the threat in front of you.

One taken down. Now all we have to do is-
Foe Minun used Quick Attack!
Toco Fainted!
My one regret... is that... I wasn't able... to say... good...-
Toco, NO!! I'll destroy you for this you fiend!
Calm down, I'm sending in backup. Focus on the objective. Toco was unfortunate, but inconsequential.
...He was right, you aren't Johnny. At least Johnny cared about us!

Hey, Johnny. Long time no see!
That's not Johnny, Scabbers.
What're ya talkin' about? Of course it's Johnny! Now let's do as he said and beat up that there Minun.
Fine, but I will avenge Toco's death.

Wait, Toco is-
Return, you two. Healing is in order. Toco will be thrown into the ocean, from whence it came.
Now that that's done, I think some more trainers were giving out EXP over there.

...


I hate you, servant of the Arbiters.
DETAINING AT 50%.
It does not matter what you think of me. I am merely a temporary. My relation with you does not matter, only Johnny's relation matters.
You sicken me, you heartless shell of a man.
The sooner your training is finished, the sooner you are rid of me.


That's all the trainers. Wild pokemon time. This could take a while. I have to hurry.



Your task is finished. Harvey, it is your turn.
I'm ready to roll, Johnny!
I'm not Johnny.
What are you talking about? Of course you're Johnny, who else could you be? Some inter-dimensional traveler sent to Earth to possess Johnny so that Data could be uploaded that would prevent the world's destruction?
How did you guess?
Hah, you thought I was serious. Let's get down to business, Johnny!




Your task is completed, Harvey of the Swift Winds. Scabbers, you have a more tedious task than any other.
You murdered Toco. I will never forgive you. He was more a man than you could ever hope to be!
You can have your revenge after you train both yourself and Titania, your companion, who is holding the illustrious EXP Share device given by the head of Devon. You will get her up to level 16 while getting yourself up to level 25.
I will not forgive you, but I do this for Johnny.




You are done with your task. Now all that remains is the metal beast. JakeSteele, come forth and perform your duties.
I-I don't know if I can...
Don't worry, you'll do fine, just like the others. I think you are the strongest on the team, actually.
Th-Thanks Johnny. You know how to bolster my-


Ah! It... paralyzed me. I don't wanna fight anymore!
Cheer up, all of your teammates were also paralyzed, but the monsters here are weak, so paralysis means nothing.
O-Ok, if you say so...




See? That wasn't too hard!
Yeah, you were right, Johnny! Thanks a bunch.
DETAINING AT... 100%
I have to go. Have fun with Johnny.
Wait, what? I thought-

Why is this happening to me... Oh well, I've finished the assignment. Now it's time to go to the next gym, I guess. At least the path is clear...

Wait, Toco? Toco?! TOCO!!

Short snippits of character for the pokemon added in. I'm going off of their actual natures for personality, although I don't think I gave detailed enough segments for all of them. However, I've got a plan for that...

If this Let's Play seems weird, please tell me how I could fix it (plot was a given), since I've never done one of these before. Thanks.

R.I.P. Toco the Sea Breeze. You will be forever replaced.

[Deme]

Poor Toco...

Still, this is an interesting update.

[The Shoveler]

Bonus Chapter 01:

Spoiler

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Hello again, dear.
Sorry I haven't written in a while, work has been getting in the way. Looking back, I realize that I haven't really been paying much attention to you and you're probably worried. Again, I'm sorry.
How's the job going? I heard from "Mom" that you've graduated medical school. Being a nurse in these times must be rough, and I wish I could be there to support you as you go through this pivotal moment of your life.
This mission has got me thinking about that Red kid from Kanto. Remember him? He would hunt down our operations and attempt to end them when they were discovered. It all started with Mt. Moon, where our operation was an innocent one: Harvest Fossils. There was nothing illegal about that, but he decided that we were to be defeated simply by what an old man in a PokeCenter told him. If it wasn't for him, I don't think we'd have met. You were just an intern at that Center when I met you, and you are still as beautiful as that very day.
However, Red decided he would investigate the Nugget bridge and shut down our operation for recruitment. We had to open our doors to some foreign operatives to get the recruits we so desperately needed. We locked down Saffron City to get to the head of Silph Co. later that day, preventing him from getting anywhere. We had the guards bribed to let no one into the city and it worked.
Then he got to Celadon City through those blasted underground tunnels. He found out about the Game Corner, but we were prepared. We still had control of the Corner, and made him think he had won by making Giovanni go somewhere else and give him the Silph Scope. He took the bait and investigated the mooks we set up guarding Mr. Fuji, who gave him the Pokeflute while we took full control of Silph Co.
I was one of those mooks, remember? I felt a sense of accomplishment as he thrashed my team, because I knew that my job was a success. He could go on destroying our randomly caught Poison and Normal type pokemon, but he wouldn't be defeating the real heart of our operation: Gyarados, Rhydon, Alakazam, Crobat, and Poliwrath, among others. We gave him the roundabout, feeding him false victories until he thought he had finally defeated Giovanni at the top of Silph Tower. I was on vacation with you at this point. Sevii Island #5 was a good spot for vacation, and the boss thought it would make a good hideout for our secondary branch. We would tell them that this Red guy would come later claiming that Team Rocket was disbanded, and they were to act surprised and run the Johto branch of Team Rocket. Simple really, and it worked.

However, I'm getting past the point. I miss you every day, Jennifer, and I wish I could be with you. But Giovanni himself chose me for this mission, and I can't help but feel that it's fate for me to do this. It's the one mission that gives me a sense of importance, and I hope you can wait for my return. See you soon, dear. Remember that I will always love you.

Love,
Johnny.

[Penguinator]

Are you leaving Scabbers as a Nincada because you're waiting for a certain move?

[The Shoveler]

Are you leaving Scabbers as a Nincada because you're waiting for a certain move?

I WAS waiting for Dig, but... that comes at a high level. I think 41 or 47. Somewhere near there. Hopefully, I can catch a Roselia. Or Gyarados gets Dragon Rage at 25/30. Training will be abundant...

[Terry576]

I WAS waiting for Dig, but... that comes at a high level. I think 41 or 47. Somewhere near there. Hopefully, I can catch a Roselia. Or Gyarados gets Dragon Rage at 25/30. Training will be abundant...

But what about Shedinja?

Or are you gonna...

FUGGEDABOUDIT?

[The Shoveler]

Nah, I'm evolving Nincada next level and trading Ninjask out for Shedinja. After all, only 5/17 types can actually damage Shedinja! Ghost, Flying, Fire, Dark, and Rock.

EDIT: Yeah, sorry about this guys. I'm just starting school back up, so I have to prepare and get back into the groove of things, so an update will probably come next week or later this weekend.

*This thread has been put on indefinate hiatus. I have no idea when I will pick this up again.*

[The Shoveler]

School has finally settled down and I've remembered this thread existed. However, I've permanently lost all the data for this Let's Play, so I'll start up a new one. I'll choose a game and get the first update up by Sunday. I've got a Yu-Gi-Oh! Tournament tomorrow, so it might be slow going. I'll put a link in this post to the new thread later.

[Lemonus]

I've permanently lost all the data for this Let's Play,

Awwwww...

I'll start up a new one.

Hurrah!

[The Shoveler]

Alright, I've decided what I'm going to do because it was fun the first time and is definitely going to be fun this time. I'm going to be moving to Fire Red version and this time I'm not going to do a Nuzlocke run... but instead I'm going to play through the game with only one pokemon (the starter) and catch other pokemon for HM use.

I'll start the thread sometime soon and link it in this thread. See you in Kanto!


And thus the WAR MACHINE LIVES!!!