Paladin Pet Peeves

[Turgon9357]

I while back, I found a thread about how people thought a fantasy dwarf would react to modern society, technology, etc. This gave me the idea for this thread, in which we will post things that people do that would grate on a Paladin's brain, but would be unreasonable to freak out and start smiting for. I suppose that the Paladin in question would be more of the Mikonian heritage, but not as likely to flip out.

I will set the pace:

Picking out specific pieces in a trail mix.

[navar100]

People posting threads making fun of paladins.

[Turgon9357]

All in good fun, friend.

[Curious]

Rule 34. Especially nuns.

[VanBuren]

Smoking.

Filthy habit, that.

[NikitaDarkstar]

Atheists. Or maybe that does cause smiting?

[Togath]

Atheists. Or maybe that does cause smiting?

actually paladins dont need deities for their powers

[Vknight]

Yes yes they do. They are the divine power source in 4e and in 3x divine spells come from worship(Or reverence/worship of nature, in which case your a druid or ranger).

[Siegel]

Yes yes they do. They are the divine power source in 4e and in 3x divine spells come from worship(Or reverence/worship of nature, in which case your a druid or ranger).

You could be a paladin of the idea of justice, the same you could be a cleric of justice

[navar100]

All in good fun, friend.

Funny how it's always paladins who get ridiculed. No postings for jokes specifically about rogues, wizards, druids, monks, warblades, beguilers, psions, etc.

[horseboy]

People who use pictures of their kids as their avatars in social media, then get pissed off at you for not accepting their friend request. If you want to go on a subscription drive from people you haven't seen in 20 years, have a picture of you from 20 years ago so you can be recognized, not some pink Yoda looking thing in a John Deere hat.

[KnightDisciple]

People posting threads making fun of paladins.

Funny how it's always paladins who get ridiculed. No postings for jokes specifically about rogues, wizards, druids, monks, warblades, beguilers, psions, etc.

What this guy said.

You could be a paladin of the idea of justice, the same you could be a cleric of justice

This is correct. Neither class requires choosing a deity. You could quite easily be a paladin who doesn't choose any one deity, or any deity, but still fights to uphold Law and Good.

Rule 34. Especially nuns.

YES. UGH.

Seriously, that's kind of a pet peeve if I ever at all stop to think about it at all. It's a perverted twisting of the whole concept behind nuns (who are distinct from "priestesses" or other similar roles), and basically is a horrible slap in the face to the concept. The people who "rule 34" nuns should be ashamed of themselves.

[VanBuren]

Funny how it's always paladins who get ridiculed. No postings for jokes specifically about rogues, wizards, druids, monks, warblades, beguilers, psions, etc.

Those other classes don't have the same uptight stereotypes that paladins sometimes have. It's a lot like asking why the Fighter never gets made fun of for being Tier 1.

[Dr.Epic]

Saving children

You never said they had to be a LG paladin. A paladin of slaughter wouldn't like that.

[Coidzor]

Sexual promiscuity.

The internet. All of it.

Funny how it's always paladins who get ridiculed. No postings for jokes specifically about rogues, wizards, druids, monks, warblades, beguilers, psions, etc.

Well, to be fair, there are stupid rogue tricks and stupid monk tricks that have been discussed in the past.

But, really, making fun of the monk is like making fun of the truenamer. Like shooting fish in a barrel. Also, Monks generally get thought of as generally more humble, possibly because they realize subconsciously how useless their path has made them. Paladins, on the other hand, are popularly thought of as full of themselves, so poking holes in the bag of hot air is kinda cathartic.

[GnomeFighter]

Atheists. Or maybe that does cause smiting?

Would a Paladin ever meet an atheist? Somewhat hard to say you don't belive in a being people have proof of. Rather like people saying they don't belive in the existance of Jay Leno or Helen Mirren (not counting the players who try).

[Draconi Redfir]

Teir systems.

[Vattic]

Seriously, that's kind of a pet peeve if I ever at all stop to think about it at all. It's a perverted twisting of the whole concept behind nuns (who are distinct from "priestesses" or other similar roles), and basically is a horrible slap in the face to the concept. The people who "rule 34" nuns should be ashamed of themselves.

really? i'm quite grateful for it, myself. if you can't take people poking a bit of fun at you (talking about nuns and religious types here, not you specifically) then you may as well sequester yourself in some desert hideaway where you will never have to interact with any other people for the rest of your life.

On topic: deliberate falsehoods that lead to positive outcomes.

[KnightDisciple]

really? i'm quite grateful for it, myself. if you can't take people poking a bit of fun at you (talking about nuns and religious types here, not you specifically) then you may as well sequester yourself in some desert hideaway where you will never have to interact with any other people for the rest of your life.

This isn't about "poking fun at nuns".

This is about taking a group of people who have set themselves apart, have purposefully committed themselves to chastity for a higher calling, and making them objects of base, perverse lusts and desires. Turning a group who willingly chooses chastity and religious contemplation, and making them a target of fetishs and lusts seems wrong on several levels. Very disrespectful.

I realize it'll still happen. That doesn't mean I have to think it's okay.

[Dr.Epic]

The internet. All of it.

How would they be against a world wide means of communication and information sharing?

[legomaster00156]

Teir systems.

I don't know what they'll think of teir systems, but yeah, they'd be rather upset at being T5 on the tier system. Really, I'm upset about that. Why did you have to make paragons of truth and justice so weak, WotC?

[Vitruviansquid]

How would they be against a world wide means of communication and information sharing?

"You mean you can find anything you want on this 'inter-net?' And NOBODY regulates it?! What if someone puts dangerous or immoral information on there? BLACK MAGIC! KNAAAAAAAAAVES!"

edit: "Downloading music is an abomination. I mean, you wouldn't download a morningstar, would you?"

[VanBuren]

"You mean you can find anything you want on this 'inter-net?' And NOBODY regulates it?! What if someone puts dangerous or immoral information on there? BLACK MAGIC! KNAAAAAAAAAVES!"

edit: "Downloading music is an abomination. I mean, you wouldn't download a morningstar, would you?"

You wouldn't steal a horse,
you wouldn't steal a knapsack,
you wouldn't steal an Orb of Scrying,
you wouldn't steal a tome.

Scribing pirated spells is stealing,
stealing is against the law,
PIRACY IT'S A CRIME

[Vitruviansquid]

Wizard: "Actually, you're not really stealing the spells you pirate. If you pirate Melf's Acid Arrow, it's not like Melf can't then cast his own Acid Arrow. Melf's Acid Arrow is still there, only it's duplicated. So actually, it's like a net gain for everybody."

Rogue: "Man, if I could download a knapsack, I totally would."

[SowZ]

Yes yes they do. They are the divine power source in 4e and in 3x divine spells come from worship(Or reverence/worship of nature, in which case your a druid or ranger).

Well, there is a subset of Paladins that doesn't worship a god but instead worships Ayn Rand...

[Zale]

"You mean you can find anything you want on this 'inter-net?' And NOBODY regulates it?! What if someone puts dangerous or immoral information on there? BLACK MAGIC! KNAAAAAAAAAVES!"

edit: "Downloading music is an abomination. I mean, you wouldn't download a morningstar, would you?"

You know, now I'm picturing a Paladin's expression after seeing... certain illicit materials.



Oh that would be funny. You'd need a new computer after he smote the first one, though.

And I'm also imagining a Paladin running around trying to find this "Internet" monstrosity so It may be smote in the name of LAW, HONOR and JUSTIIIIIICCE!

[Mike_G]

This isn't about "poking fun at nuns".

This is about taking a group of people who have set themselves apart, have purposefully committed themselves to chastity for a higher calling, and making them objects of base, perverse lusts and desires. Turning a group who willingly chooses chastity and religious contemplation, and making them a target of fetishs and lusts seems wrong on several levels. Very disrespectful.

I realize it'll still happen. That doesn't mean I have to think it's okay.

Screw nuns.

I went to Catholic school and was verbally abused when I was freaking six years old by some sexless crone in a black dress.

Sister Rosemary, may she rot in hell, actually told a class of first graders that if we didn't quiet down there "would be dead bodies strewn all over this room."

Those of us who survived refer to St Joe's as "The Atheist Factory"

So, the only reason I object to rule 34ing the whole bunch of them is that there is nothing desirable about a nun.

[Draconi Redfir]

I don't know what they'll think of teir systems, but yeah, they'd be rather upset at being T5 on the tier system. Really, I'm upset about that. Why did you have to make paragons of truth and justice so weak, WotC?

I was more thinking about the fact that it promotes discriminaition and innequality, but sure that works too i guess

And I'm also imagining a Paladin running around trying to find this "Internet" monstrosity so It may be smote in the name of LAW, HONOR and JUSTIIIIIICCE!

MAIL!

[SowZ]

Screw nuns.

I went to Catholic school and was verbally abused when I was freaking six years old by some sexless crone in a black dress.

Sister Rosemary, may she rot in hell, actually told a class of first graders that if we didn't quiet down there "would be dead bodies strewn all over this room."

Those of us who survived refer to St Joe's as "The Atheist Factory"

So, the only reason I object to rule 34ing the whole bunch of them is that there is nothing desirable about a nun.

Yeah, I understand how such a thing can happen. But isn't insulting a group of people and actively disliking them because of your experiences with them the same type of justification many racist people use? At the end of the day, what makes prejudice against a religion or group within a religion that isn't wrong inherently, (belittling children is certainly not inherent to being a nun,) much different than prejudice against an ethnic group?

[VanBuren]

Wizard: "Actually, you're not really stealing the spells you pirate. If you pirate Melf's Acid Arrow, it's not like Melf can't then cast his own Acid Arrow. Melf's Acid Arrow is still there, only it's duplicated. So actually, it's like a net gain for everybody."

Rogue: "Man, if I could download a knapsack, I totally would."

Sorcerer: "Listen, Brosiris. It's all about intellectual property. Why shouldn't I profit off of the spells I create?"

Artificer: "Exactly. If I don't profit off of my labor, hell, if I can't even break even, then there's no motivation for me to create."

VoP Monk: "I don't believe in material goods. Learn from my mistakes.